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A confusing day. Mind Blanks, drifting off into sleep, even when on the computer. I’d had the longest unbroken sleep for ages, yet this did nothing to curb the drooping eyes, lack of concentration and endless run of depression bouts, varying between a few minutes, and hours. I have been nibbling all day long, never eaten so much in a day for many a month.
Generally feeling fatigued without cause or reason.
0400hrs; Woke up, and just laid there, almost unthinkingly, in the itch-creating, bruise-giving, catheter-tube-tugging, crumb-decorated from my nocturnal nibblings, God-awfully uncomfortable, cringingly-grotty, no longer working, dirty beige recliner, anti-sleep designed, c1966, second-hand bought for £300, ten years ago from the charity shop. Four what must have been an hour or so. Joined by 
, which I don’t think bothered me too much at the time. It felt like having a video playing repetitively in my head, over several mistakes and bad options I’d taken many years ago. I surrendered any resistance, considering myself worthy of the self-lambasting verbal flow.
A good shade this morning.
Three early morning views.
The high moon in the amazingly light sky.
When I got back to the kitchen, the sky seemed to have gotten a lot, very grown much darker?
Or, did I set 
wrongly?
Closer up.
Even closer.
Not sure why I took this one.
I mosied along to the computer and got myself in a pickle, as I made so many errors, unfelt key depressions, and ended up having to close each open programme, and restart, in the hopes of getting the keyboard that I’d some-buggered up. Miraculously, when I rebooted it was working again.
This temporarily cheered me up.
I went out on the balcony to try and take a shot of the end car park, now seemingly permanent mudslide.
A pad patch here. Two hours at least. I’d just become aware of things, and a new Carer Called. I hope she does again, too. 
, a lovely gal. She introduced herself, and got the leg strappings on, and sorted the medications for me.
Well, blanks, really. Several over about an hour
I can recall taking this shot. I was in a depression at the time; the keyboard was playing up again… or maybe 
was, or both of us?
A Carer called, who and when I’m not certain. But after she or he had been, I deflated spiritually and physically. The computer turned off, and I got an early meal made. I swear I thought I’d taken two photos of that meal, recalling that the first one was so bad, that I took another one. But much, much later, hours later, after my failed attempts at sleeping or watching TV, when I got around to putting the photographs on the blog, it was on the card. Yet, the photo of the ice cream I had for desserts, was there on the SD card? 
!
The attempt to get to sleep failed.
So, I tried watching TV. That failed and became so annoying, I got all agitated with myself. I get have few nodding-offs of a minute or so. No phone calls came in all day. Which is not unusual, but this brought on another depression and bouts of self-pity.
I am having a bad day.
Cheered when I had an Email from HRH Lisa. ♥
I literally sat there afterwards, with the TV pointlessly on, not being controllable, as, indeed, my mind was in a similar position, hazy.
I decided to get back on the computer again and I might as well stay up to get some New Year fireworks shots taken. But my confidence in getting any is minimal, to say the least. But I’ll try, but will I cope with falling asleep and missing them… or the shots coming out badly? Which is likely, as I type this, my old friend 
is kicking off, and not showing any signs of stopping yet.
Pressed on with this blog, to get as much done as I can before the planned fireworks photographicalisationing begins. If I don’t fall asleep! I didn’t. I think I was doing graphics for the blogs for a couple of hours, but it was going excruciatingly slow.
The late Carer removed the ankle and leg strappings and ointmentated the lower legs. They were not painful at all during the day but started itching away on removal. Resisting scratching was a hard job. Hehe! However, they were a lot better than they had been lately, so a positive at last. The only pain was from the ingrowing toenail toe, that I proceeded to make worse by stubbing it on the £300 second-hand shop bought, c1966. moth-eaten, bedraggled, grotty, cringingly-beige-coloured, much-dilapidated, crumb-containing from my nocturnal nibblings, bug-ridden, itch-inspiring, not working recliner leg. It seems to be going a darker colour and bent more now?
Around 23:00hrs, I tried to take a decent shot of the end car park mudslide; you can just make it out.
The time (midnight) came for me to attempt to take the New Year fireworks photos from the kitchen window. Unbelievably bad shots they were too!
Unintendedly artistic, though?
Unintendedly artistic, though?
Unintendedly artistic, though?
Unintendedly artistic, though?
For a New Year, suitably so,
Artistic, but not a Gainsborough,
Showing a hint of fe-fi-fo?
As into the New Year, we flow…
As a sage, these things I know,
Sunak Rishi will have to go…
A defeated Tory will whistle-blow!
The little boats will exceedingly grow…
For Starmer, a coming body blow!
He will become a confused Pinocchio,
World War instigated via Moscow,
President Xi Jinping, China, also!
Arms Oligarchs’ wealth, will overflow,
The West will lose its limited Mojo,
Europe will ban alcohol & tobacco…
Legalise Cocaine, & Heroin, taxed though,
Then replace football with Subutteo,
Europe will become the last Alamo,
The smaller free word, ran by the Mafioso!
Of course, this is all rubbish – Cheerio!
Another bite to eat.
Two slices of plain bread, with one…
Gorgeous early morning supper!
Oh, I only just remembered…
TTFN, All!
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Oh, What a Beautiful Morning 
…
Oh, all right then...
The urine was a little dark again.
I made a right mess of that one. Tried again…
This one was not a lot better.
Getting the diabetic socks off was not easy, and twice, I nearly took a tumble trying to get back upright after each sock was clawed off the legs. It had to happen, of course, as I tripped on the leg quilt that I had taken off. Somewhat painfully, although I didn’t hit the deck, managing to lean toward the 
. This displays my stupidity, as I was about to go to the wet room to have a stand-up wash and shave, thus washing off the Germolene in the process. Humph!
Yellowy, runny, stinky!
I’d got the larger Morrisons PPs on and set about removing them along with the dried blood from 
, after he’d been tugged at by the 
. The crusted haemoglobin broke, and red flowed down my leg onto the floor. I had to clean it up before starting shaving, in case I slipped on it
Got the floor cleaned and started to get the shaving done. Things went well today. Just one teeny-weeny nick on the ear hole. But not for long..
Well, that was the third 
out of the way.
arrived. She Germolened the right leg for me first off.
Then got the diabetic sock on for me, and we got the leg straps on between us. She did a good job of them. 
Then she issued the medications for me.
She’s spent a little longer with me than usual due to the extra fittings needed, and she had to rush off. Bless her. Did a good job all around.
I was on the blogging, and doing well, I thought.
called on me. I was in a bit of a state of losing the memory of what I’d been doing for so long, and I mentioned the FND symptoms, of which memory loss is included, and she listened to me, which was nice. She took the laundry down with her for me.
The pool had shrunken a little.
I made another mug of tea, and to my surprise, 
turned up. Where had the time gone? I was not concentrating at all.
It is not advisable to think that because things like 
& 
You will not like them unless you like the flavour of mushy-crushed cardboard. I imagine if anyone ate them, they would end up with tummy aches, as wot I did. And I only ate four of them before dishing the others in the waste bin, post haste.
Although Not Glorious This Time!
Then a closer Kodak Tim shot was taken.
A charm in this one?
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Nocturnal urine was a bit lighter.
Started by sorting the waste bags into one.
The plan was to get a shower & shave, so I left off the leg and ankle straps when Carer Richard arrived. When I asked him not to put them on, I asked if he could please ring my landline, as I’d not had any calls coming in and was worried that Liberty-Global may have gone off again. I gave him the wrong number and cheered him up. He verbally suggested that I was a nuisance – he was right. I found the correct number, and he rang again; the first one I gave him was for the Audio Clinic. Tsk! The landline rang. Thus, it made me feel much better that no one had rung me for four days. Humph! Sulk! Hehe!
I am off to the wet room for the only visit up till now of this very wet, rainy Thursday.
Hey-Ho!
I took a half-decent shot to the moon as I made a brew of Glengettie… 
Later, I spotted a chap from the flats on his disability scooter going up the gravel path to the park. He was driving along like Stirling Moss. The legal limit for these is 8 mph, but he was rattling away at well over that speed and uphill. If I get one, I’ll ask him where he got this one from.
.
.
Not good this one…
Not good, but better than the first?
Ah, well!
I didn’t, and not much wiser now that I’ve seen the rings on this explanation, what’s different about the yellow glove? Ah, I’ve gorrit now!
Bread at last!
The tomato sauce I ordered turned out to be something else. It warned on the label that it was an extra pungent chilli sauce. I’ll give that away!
The Danish loaf (substituted for Milk Roll bread) was eaten later with the evening meal.
I put some honeyed parsnips in the oven. And a can of curried beans, with tomato & basil sauce, and a suitable splashing of the Beetroot Borscht into the pan. 
Adding some gammon slices cut up.
It seems to me that every week, some animal is freed from a life sentence for murder and commits another killing! This scumball Bierton has now achieved three murders of elderly women, two while released from prison with the blessings of the overpaid, incompetent members of our HMG Parole Board, killers!
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It did look like that. Can you see it? Or is it just me and 
The contents were much lighter this morning.
Not that I’m likely to find myself in such a position again. I’m waffling, aren’t I? Sorry. I grabbed hold of
I was pretty pleased with my first close-up effort.
I tried again, a little more zoomed in.
erupted. Haha!
was enjoyed…but not for long.
started to fall all over the place! The earlier enjoyed smug modes were a distant memory now. So, I changed plans after a little ambivalent faffling. I decided to remove the PPs…
ever bled so much before overnight. NO! The blood had dried rock solid on my hair and skin! Naturally, the removal of the pants caused it to start bleeding afresh! More mess to clean up and another battle to stop it bleeding!
That was nice for a change.
Oh, dearie, me…
I was putting away the shaving tackle, I dropped a razor, & automatically grabbed it before it hit the deck.
So, the medicationalisationing started again. 
Thanks to the Germolene and heavy-duty plasters.
I returned to the wet room to check I’d not left the water running; all was safe.
The itching started again on the legs.
I asked him if he would put some of the cream for the Acne on my legs. He did so, and then he got the diabetic socks and legging straps.
Afternoon Shot.
Evening Shot.
Night shot to the right
Night shot ahead.
removed.
The papule lesions were creamed by Chris.
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I’m no longer educatable!
Not much nocturnal drainage?
Another poor morning shot…
Oh, dear, another one!
Not much rain today.
And an instant, as usual, unexpected, another 
caught me out as I went into the kitchenette. The stack of medical drawers was knocked over with some aplomb…
Everything got mixed up, and I had a devil job sorting out what should go back into which drawer! All the bending down and getting back up certainly remained in the memory box
Imbecilically, I then checked under the table and the spare room…
I got myself confused somewhat.
And abandoned my medicational investigations.
Found myself taking some evening shots from the open kitchenette window.
Best sunset for a good while tonight.
Baked curried beans and soy mini sausages (all gone now, sadly). Tomato passata added, with the regulation Milk Roll sliced bread. I think I enjoyed it..
visit, stifled my recalling from her on, until the last caller visited and woke me up. No idea who it was. 
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. 
A deeper twinge to it today.
A mixed bag from the bog evacuations.
I made a hash of my first-morning view shot.
So I waited until 
All working again!
Maryham issued the medications.
Warfarin INR Anticoagulation Nurse arrived.
Enoxaparin-filled hypos, as these I had were out of date.
Seconds later, the blood was flowing from the puncture wound, had soaked the cotton wool padding and was trickling down my arm. 
I sprayed the big quilt that Carer Israel had folded for me last night and was left on the bed. Which, as soon as the safety rail is fitted, I can use.
Oh, I nearly missed this one off the blog. Earlier, 
Back on the computer.
And continued…
And continued…
Yet the mudslide did not grow any bigger?
Mystery Photo?
.
Caramelised soy mini-sausages, tomatoes, and boiled potatoes, with some sauce. Milk Roll bread, and a pot of orange flavoured jelly for afters. 
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terminology used, but I think you’ll get the idea. And it worked!
better this morning.
The first twist of the new bottle of soda water, and the contents were sprayed out, some hitting the ceiling, most of it landing on the chair and quilt, not to mention soaking my dressing gown and legs! 
it was the Asda order arriving. 
chimed from the door buzzer, and the driver put the things into carriers for me, bless him. No rushing, he patiently waited while I took a bag at a 
time to the kitchen and returned to the door for more. 
Basic fodder, potatoes and bread. I’d bought too much bread; there was no room in the freezer for it all. Tsk! 
But, I gave some away.
A bit of room left in the fridge, though. Not to fret, tons of canned soups, beans etcetera in the cupboards to have with some of the mass of bread in stock. Two jars of Polish Pork Knuckle in the fridge too. The tomatoes were, unfortunately, Spanish ones. They taste terrible, this time of year. I was hoping 
they’d send Dutch, but, no luck. A load of treats & nibbles are now available for the Christmas and New Year carers & nurses. Bless ’em all!
Arrived as I was clearing up after putting the fodder away. I mentioned my not getting any calls in on the new phone, but I could ring out. Richard got his 
mobile and got the unknown number message. Then he rang his own phone on my landline, and my new but no one told me I had a new number, for the landline, number came up on his mobile. I think! Good old Richard! 
arrived ♥, I was so glad to see her. She really helped me out today, in many a way, I say! 
Sorted out paperwork that needed shredding and did it for me. Showed me how to record a programme on the new TV. I think I’ve got it now. She set up the TV to record ‘Heartbeat’ for me. ♥
After the gal had departed, I was always sad. Then, I sent an email to those who may want to phone me with the new number. Only Jenny rang me. But it was to tell me she’s tried three times to get through on the new number, and couldn’t! This was depressing news for me. She rang off and tried again, and got through? My first phone call on the new landline. Hurrah! But, no one else had got through. I rang Sister Jane, but she couldn’t. She’ll try again later in the day. I 
rang the Doctor’s with the new number. Kara rang the 
earlier and confirmed the lift for the morning to see and return from my visit to see the psychotherapist… Which still amazes me. I mentioned to the lady in the reception at the Audio Clinic, that I could no longer change the tubing on my hearing aids, due to my Peripheral Neuropathy. Explaining that this means my neurotransmitters are dying, and I cannot sense touching things or not; the brain is not getting the messages, or getting the wrong ones. And she booked me an appointment to see the Dementia Psychotherapist, tomorrow. 
After hours of blogging and mistake-making, I stood up to get to the kitchenette in search of a nibble… The day pouch almost fell to my ankles; it was that full. But, I rescued the situation in my usual calm, efficient manner. Well, it didn’t burst anyway!
Time to get a meal sorted out. 
Bacon bits, tomatoes, passata, liquid sea salt, Milk Roll bread and a banana. Very Nice! Flavour Rating: 8.3/10. After washing the things up, I destroyed three bags of cheesy curls. Hehe!
The missing flag fooled me. Tsk!
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The Red-Eye is redder. The Urine is darker. Cartilages Chloe & Carole are so painful and have given way a few times on me already. The Mystery rib pains are back again. I cut myself four times shaving. Neuropathy Pete has had two unintentional leg dances before 06:00hrs!
overnight had encrusted on the Catheter tube, my testicles, thighs and the protection pants. I’ve never had this so bad before. But, naturally, a man of my pain-bearing capabilities and heroic nature, did not cry out and swear, or nearly lose my balance as I started to clean things up, or spit on the floor!
when she kicked off for at least an hour of non-stop jiggling in an effort to dislodge the shoulder socket. Which, in turn, caused so many mistakes on the computer, I had to stop using it until Shirley had settled. Yet, I’m not complaining, for today there were two moments of sheer joy; admittedly, the second one didn’t last long, but still, every minor victory helps. 
, and they were both as near to normal as they have ever been in many a month of Sundays. Nice, not messy!
Oh, heck, that’s dark!
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, 
and 
were all in activation mode, and a smidgeon of self-pity came over me. As the coughing started. Followed, immediately I tried to mode, by the involuntary sharp in-taking of breaths? Nowt new, it was the same yesterday, but I’d hoped things would have died down a little by now. 
Then, as I stood up to get to photograph the colour of the bag’s urine… I emitted what can only be called a cry in pain of Argh! Or similar. 
kicked off, and will be with me as I hobble until January the something when the foot-lady calls on me. This is not a good prospect. Then again, have I any good prospects ahead of me? Not had many in the past,
either. Haha!
To the kitchenette, and took this rather failed photograph of the first morning view.
Another cock-up effort. 
I suppose me being either a gifted pareidolian or bonkers, see it clearly. Haha!
were even worse. So, I gave up. I’m going to have an early meal 
and settle down for a break. 
My pareidolia came out again. One of the little clouds (circled, right) looked just like a mouse to me. Just thought I’d mention it. I emptied out what drop there 
was of urine in the day pouch, and off to get the nosh cooking.
Mystery photo taken yet again here? Why, what for, when and any reasoning is not on the agenda at the moment. Another accidental activation?
Made a brew and got back on the computer for a while getting some blog catching-up done. Well, I say done, I made so many cock-ups I gave up after an hour or so.
all up, and delved into the fridge to get some ice cream for afters. 
woke me up an hour later. I was not in good shape response-wise. 
… he kept on installing what sounded like evidence in a courtroom being read out… reminding me of my past failings, bad decisions and lack of success. On, and on he went!
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tended too early… I can’t remember why, but was sure it needed to get done. I grappled my way out of the itch-creating, bruise-giving, catheter-tube-tugging, crumb-decorated from my nocturnal nibblings, God-awfully uncomfortable, cringingly-grotty, no longer working, dirty beige recliner, anti-sleep designed, c1966, second-hand bought for 
£300, twelve years ago from the charity shop, and then started to remove the 
. Oh, dearie me! Just look at the colour!
Took the above photo, emptied the bag, and got the things ready to go to the wet room to tackle the risky duty of getting Shaving, showering, medicating and dressing done.
or
, although Conrad had a slight advantage. 
As you can see, the shaving had the odd little cut accrued, bleeding. Hehe!
the raised toilet seat. Pretty!
…
.
Made a brew, and took this kitchen window view of the windy morning.
arrived. I asked her to cream the papules, put on the diabetic socks, ankle and leg strapping, and take the laundry down with her. The laundry is still there. But she did a great job with the strappings for me. A lovely gal. Took the rubbish bag with her too. 
temperature.
Then the recent ailments returned with a vengeance. Led by 
,
and an in-form 
.