Inchcock: Wednesday 9th November, 2022

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00:15hrs: I woke up with a little jerk and waited for the brain to catch me up. I was feeling surprisingly calm, considering the upcoming ‘bound-to-be-a-farce’ prepping for the hospital visit, then the mysteriously unknown what for; by both the hospital reception, Deana, Carer Richard, Carer Shannon, Carer Jodie, appointments themselves.

Made a brew of Thompson’s Punjana tea. Updated the Tuesday blog. It took longer than I expected cause I had the evening photos taken to tweak and add.

PREPARED THINGS I NEEDED TO TAKE WITH ME: To the hospital. I’ll have to remember to put the hearing aids in later. Got the paperwork in a plastic folder. Put that with the four spectacles needed. List of medications and doses. I can’t remember the others now, but I’m not going to take them out of the carrier again for fear of losing or forgetting to take them.


Got the clothes needed to change into. Socks, shirt, trews, and a long-sleeved thick shirt.
Into the wet room.
No messing, I got the teggies done, bleeding gums, and started Toothache Tiffany of again.
A few more than usual cause I was rushing, I suppose. I thought to myself, a 2-hour ETA means I’ll be sitting waiting and afraid to do anything cause I’ve got to respond straight away; they tell me when the lift arrives.
Possibly the same reason for the dropsies in the shower? Showerhead, gel bottle (3), flannel, loofah (2) and knocked the scum-cleaner bottle over. What was it doing in there? Well… I’ve no idea?
Drying off under the wall heater (Blimey, it was cold this morning!), I dropped the towel twice. The second time I tried to catch it… well, I did, actually. But I knocked endless items off of the floor cabinets in the process… The olive oil dropper, Eye drops, Germoloid ointment and
Daktacort cream. The oil dropper (it had to be the hardest thing!) landed right on my right foot’s Onychovryptosis (Ingrowing toenail)!
Having medicated and refreshed myself, I started to dress by putting on the Protection-Pants… Felt a twinge of pain from the bum and investigated… I fear it’s another boil or furuncle coming on.
I avoided using Sock-Glide-Glenda by leaning back into a corner of the room and managed to get both socks on.
But copped for a Right leg Neuropathic Schuhplattler dance as I was just about to get both feet on the ground! Hence, I now have a bruise on my right knee and another one on the elbow.
Then I got to do the .

How disappointing, down-heartening and annoying!

I was rather hoping to make it a hat-trick of good numbers…

I was making a mug of Glengettie and spotted the high, very small moon. Surrounded by beautiful blue skies.

Then I proceeded in a northerly direction and zoomed in on the planet. With hopes of getting some detail of the surface showing.

I don’t know why I bother!

I suppose there is a chance that the eyes are not picking out the finer points. No!

I decided suddenly (I do that sometimes, you know), To go downstairs and wait in the front lobby for the lift to the hospital. Did some checks first.

I left down at 0713hrs.

Tenant Chrissie was in the lobby, waiting for her taxi to arrive. We had a most enjoyable chinwag ad nattering session between us.

I got the crossword book out and had a go at it.
But it was a futile effort. As I read a clue, the whole page of them would blend together and look almost like running water! I gave up.

The marks that I could see on the windows while looking out for the lift arriving, for some reason, annoyed me?

At 0858hrs, I spotted the lift arriving. And thus began a long, late arrival for my appointment at the Queens Medical Centre and the EENT department.
The two drivers had three other patients in the ambulance and picked up two more en route.
The traffic was bad. When we arrived, they dropped me off first, and the driver put me in a wheelchair, and they both came in with me to ascertain I got to the right place.
This is how it went: We got to the EENT main reception and showed them the paperwork. The female told me. they had to go up to the third floor – which we did.
On the third floor, the paperwork came out again, and we were told we needed the fourth floor.
I recognised the fourth-floor area; that’s where I went on my last visit. The paperwork came out again, and we were told to go back down to the first floor again! So, we did!
A different receptionist checked the paperwork this time. And they took me through to another clinic to await being called into an assessment room.
within minutes, a young nurse came for me.
Asked why I was in a wheelchair. Can’t you manage with the trolley guide you’ve got? ‘Yes, I replied’ We went into a room to have a longish question and answer session. She checked the spectacle paperwork and began to tell me what was going to happen when they called me back.
She spoke so quickly, that I missed a lot of what she was saying. But didn’t worry too much, as she gave me paperwork and leaflets to give before coming in. 42 pages of them! See lower down on this page!  I then departed to the reception desk and was told where to wait for my lift.
Five hours later, the lift arrived! Another run around, too.
A patient and Carer were already in the ambulance.
The driver cleverly got us to the Treatment Centre to collect another patient.
It didn’t take him long to fetch him. Then in the heavy traffic again, the chap made his way to Basford to drop off the second patient gathered.
Then on to Carrington, to a nursing home to drop off the other patient and carer. And have a laugh and chinwag with the crowd of Carer females who came out to see him. Must admit, he was rather good-looking. Hehe!
Then, back to Sherwood to drop me off.

I thanked him and got the kettle on, sharpish. While it was boiling, I took a quick look at the paperwork I’d got to digest for the operation…

This is going to take some absorbing, methinks!

I got on with updating this blog. And was doing pretty with it. Then, the computer would not let me type or use the keyboard on anything?
I believed I’d just hit a series of wrong keys in my rushing to get the job done. But I know not what I’d actually done wrong. I turned off the computer and rebooted it… Argh! A dreaded Blue Screen came on! lt told me what keys to press for help and to Start… but pressing them made no difference.
I was incapable of sorting out anything. I was in a proper state, mentally, and felt this was the end of my beloved blogging days!
I was desperate, and I went to ask my neighbour Malcolm if he could help.
He came to take a look, uncertain if he could help.
Within minutes, he’s found the problem. The batteries in the keyboard had died a death! Malcolm fitted the new batteries and booted the computer up!
I was so relieved I could have kissed him – but didn’t, of course. Bless him; saved the day again!

I’d spent so long trying to sort it out; the blogging wasn’t caught up with me after all. and
Another late night in the offing. !

Came in and got the medications sorted out for me. I insisted on some treat-selecting being done! Bless her! Listened to my tale of the day’s farcicalnesses.

Went to get the nosh sorted out.
I got the mock pork in the oven cooking slowly on low heat. I forgot to add the olive oil spray tonight. That was not an amazing statement, considering the day I’d had. Took this photo of the evening skyline and had a look again at the leaflets, booklets and A4 pages of advice and instruction on the cataract pre and post-procedures.
My brain froze and refused to let me understand what I was looking at, had just read, or why I was bothering. Considering it was mostly fuliginous-flapdoodle and mostly incomprehensible to my affected brain. I gave up!

Checked the oven and got the TV on to watch what was left of the Heartbeat episode on channel ten.

I woke up and got the nosh served up.
I think the messy long day had affected me more than I thought – I was close to falling asleep several times while eating this meal. Tsk!
Ended up with terrible toothache before I’d finished eating it. Had to leave some of the shoulder and chips; too hard.

Washed the pots, washed and changed into jammies, into the recliner and commenced the usual routine of nodding off, springing awake, nodding off, nodding off, springing awake, nodding…

Inchcock: Monday 7th November 2022

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Sorry for the contents being short on details today.
One of those impossible-to-concentrate days.

Another can’t-get-to-sleep night. But at least I slept in, a reaction from the body mayhap in protest at Sweet Morpheus’s attitude to my requests for rest. So I reckon I’d got nigh on 6-hours of kip, much better.

I didn’t get up until 06:30hrs. A hint of mode came to me when I realised that if I slept this long on Wednesday, I could blob getting the lift to the hospital. Oh, dear!

I got up, had a wee-wee, emptied and cleaned the overnight bucket, and pressed on with getting the sorted. A couple of nicks shaving, but nothing serious. The teggies, shaving and washing etc., went rather well, actually. 
With the Porcelain Throne session, though. Unexpectedly, Trotsky Terence took over the bowels this time. What a mess!

I dressed and got the computer on, and did the health checks for today.

Well, what a nice surprise! Still in the Amber.
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arrived while I was making a brew and looking at what I’d got to eat for dinner in the fridge and cupboards.

Richard got the medications sorted and went and fetched the Flash speed mop and assembled it was a little quick for me to follow, but he kindly went through it again a little later for me. Who’s getting thick in his Dementia Doreen affected days? Hehe! You’re right!

Not only that, he used it… Fancy using someone’s new mop for the first time! It’s taken the edge off of my enthusiasm now, for the first time to use it. Hehehe! Only joking!

I must say he did it in no time. He didn’t move everything out of the way for this demonstration, and it seemed like three minutes before it was done!
Not confident about setting the new pads, but when I’ve done it a few times I should be alright. As long as the shakes don’t come on while I’m trying to fit them. What are the odds you’re offering for that a fit, shake, involuntary leg dance and or that the neurotransmitters don’t go offline when I try to fit the pads the first time? Hahaha!

Richard put the attachments on the old Carers table for me, telling me to leave them there, so you don’t lose them, keep them in sight! Richard knows what’s what. Bless him! We had a little natter, and he had to go; understandably, his bed awaited his attention.

I slipped him some treats, I insisted, said my farewells and thanked him for his help. But something was not right the moment he departed, and I shut the door; EQ told me not to panic… I wasn’t panicking. at least, I didn’t think I was. I thought I was in a good mood after just having Richard helping me. Annoyingly, EQ did not to me speak again? Somethings coming up that do me no good, but what and when? I forgot all about it and went to make a brew of, not Glengettie – for I have run out of their teabags. I could have sworn I had a box of them in the spare room, too! I also believed I had another box of the Co-op 99 teabags, but neither was seeable? Such are the mysteries of Woodthorpe Court, with the ghosts, wraiths, spectres, cacodemons, apparitions, and other grotesqueries that haunt the hallways and lobbies, searching for Inchcock; to curse with bad luck, create ambiguities, abstrucities, perplexities, misfortunes and botherations, to scare. worry and confuse me! They hide things as well!

I took photographs of the morning view from the kitchenette window! When I got around to loading these, I found the top one from yesterday.
I’m pretty certain I did not put it in the Sunday blog.
The morning rain was just bringing down another mini mudslide at the end car park.

I took a shot of the much-missed tree copse. I really loved walking through that up the hill to the Woodthorpe Grange Park every day… sadly I miss the smells and the odd wildlife when walking through the trees… and if anyone was about, I’d talk to the trees and any animals showing themselves to me.
I noticed how full the bottom car parking spaces were, and this made me realise how late I’d got up, and it brought about the worries of me not getting ready in time if the hospital transport came early. In fact, I dreaded missing them.

It cheered me up so, to see it was Nurse Hristina from the Phlebotomy DVT Warfarin Clinic to take a blood sample for the INR reading. She patiently read the Cataract letter for me to see if there were any signs of whether or not they were going to perform the operation on Wednesday – or if it would be another two Pre-assessments. I’ve had six already? When Deana rang the Queen’s Medical Centre Hospital about it, whoever she spoke to said she didn’t know either! Getting fed up comes easier for me! Hristina was very patient with me. ♥

Very belatedly, I got on the computer to update the Sunday blog, going on the WordPress comments section first. After an hour or two, a message came up from Microsoft warning about heavy rain in your area today?

Herbert in the flat above started his banging about again.
I did not retaliate. Although I’m not saying I wasn’t tempted to.
Eventually, very late on, I got the updating done and posted.

l wandered into the kitchen and added some items to the planned meal.&- Roasted veg sauce and some soya imitation bacon bits.

While making a brew, I think whatever EQ was on about affected me.
Not going into detail; just saying that my concentration was abysmal. I struggled to get making a brew of Thompson’s Punjana tea made properly. I decided to sit down for a while to drink the tea. (It went cold)
I nodded off, and I was flabbergasted when about three hours later. rudely woke me up. I thought it might be the evening carer, but no one came in. So I went to the door, and it was Josie bringing back the pots from her Sunday lunch. I was awake enough to ask her if she enjoyed it, and she answered, ‘Yes, very nice!’ That was good!

I went back to the computer, and I started doing this blog. But soon found it unbelievably hard work. Something was wrong; I just couldn’t spell words, understand them, or understand what I was doing minutes earlier… genuinely worrying.

Then the fretting over not getting up in time for the j074:00 > 09:00hr pick-up on Wednesday. Anything was likely to get me worrying at that moment. What’s going on?

Then, Herbert kicked off again. This time I matched each clatter and bang with one of my own, hitting the top[ of the tall bookcase. At least he stopped.
Around 18:20 hours, I got the chilli mixture cooking. Hope the Carer doesn’t come while I’m eating it –  didn’t think of that before.

As I typed that, in walked Carer Jodie. Hehehe! Early tonight, but she sounded a little Jaded. I soon got her laughing with my natterings after she did the medications. Treats in thanks, and off she went on her mission. Hehe!

Got the bean chilli and veg nosh served up. Had the last two brown cobs with it, and a lemon soya yoghourt

Very nice; the seasonings seemed to work alright. The smoked 7- Mediterranean Vegetable sauce suited this chilli.

As you can see, I didn’t leave a lot in the dish. Hahaha!

A flavour rating of 8.2/10 seemed to be a fair judgement. I just hope that the innards don’t start erupting later…
Sweet Morpheus was again reluctant to let me nod off. He relented in the early hours of the morning, and I think I got four-hours-uninterrupted shut-eye!  Then sprang awake, nodded, woke, slept, woke, fell asleep, woke…
Humph!

Monday 3rd October 2022

POLITICAL CARTOON

Mikhail Gorbachev died at the age of 91

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04:45hrs: I returned to the land of the limitation living. At the same instant, I required the attention of the . So did the balance exercises (that sounds so good, dunnit? Ha-Ha! They take about 30 seconds. Caught my balance, put the slippers on, grabbed Metal-Mickey, and started to go to the wet room? Blimey, the toes were tender this morning!

The evacuation was as soft as grease. No bleeding, and Harold’s Haemorrhoids were not stinging too much. I decided, as I often do on a morning when the Throne is needed so early, to get the ablutions done.
And the went exceptionally well, so much so that a . One cut shaving… did you read that? Grrreat!
Only the situation was of any real hurt. Mind you, I do have two of them, Humph! The fear is that will join in later on. She’s been a right nuisance these last three days.

I got Carer Richards bit on the server top; I just got the stuff from the fridge added to them later. Made a brew of Thompson’s Punjana tea and got the computer on. I was updating the Sunday blog but got another summoning to the Off to the wet room, carefully. I must avoid any stubbed toes now the ingrowing nails have started. What a difference this session! It was only 45 minutes ago when I last sat on the Throne. But this time, the evacuation was reluctant. And it needed much forceful input on my behalf to get it started. Once the bomb started escaping, it gathered great speed, hitting the water, splashing some water up my bum! As I stood to inspect the results, Hehehe! The main thing on my concentration was the pain from the toes – which soon changed. Temporary Boy had it bled! I was concerned about where the blood came from. An inspection, a blind one of course, of the rear end using the kitchen towels, and it soon became apparent that it was , but not the usual deep red, so I assumed it was the internal ones that copped for the tearing treatment? Certainly set off the stinging again.
Washing myself afterwards and , the absence for the best part of a day, kicked off. That was when I realised that Harold’s externals were torn as well… Either that or I cut them when I started performing, Which raised an interesting question; Why can’t I wipe my bottom with the left hand? I’m a lefty at writing? Just a thought, like. Finished up and went back to the computer.

The snotty neighbour from above started his banging, and I replied each time with a bang back on the top of the high bookcase. Childish, I know.

Oh, I forgot to put the photos of the early morning view on the blog. So, here they are.

How does the saying go? Red sky in the morning, Shepherds Warning – Red Sky at night, Shepherds Delight.

Arrived, and he was making out things were not too bad when I inquired if his status. But the lad was coughing, sneezing and yawning an awful lot this morning. He’s got an extra call to make.
Hehe!. I told of Fridays happening in the wind and rain, the Vampire foot girl cutting two of my ingrowing nailed toes, etc. But I gave him the short version, or I might have lost him as he fell asleep.

He left his treats until the next day. Took the three bags of waste to the chute and then returned to say a fond farewell to me. Bless him; he looked all done in.

I got the started.
The figures returned were similar to yesterday.
The body temperature was climbing again.
SYS 168, DIA 77. Pulse was still pretty high at 89.

I made an addition to the Blood Pressure Chart. I put a caricature of me using with a paintbrush on it.
Just for fun!
Another day all in the Red Zone.
This time back up to Hypertension Red – 2.
It’s not looking good.
When I went to the doctor in error last week, I mentioned this High Blood Pressure to Doctor Vindla.
She didn’t answer, speak or acknowledge that I was there.
At least she’s consistent nowadays. Tsk!
I was going to mention Doreen Dementias’ part in my life.
But what was the point?
Then I finally got the blog sent off to WordPress. Made a start proper on this blog and; started on me again. Just as I feared she may. With Anne Gyna, and then when I stand or move bothersome ingrowing toenails, I don’t think I could handle anymore at the same time.
This is bad.

At about 15:00hrs, an alarm went off, but only for a few seconds. It sounded to my ears as if it was in this room. But if it was the fire alarm for the flat, I’d have heard that, alright.

  And her stabbing pains are getting more severe all the time. I’ll see how it goes but I may dial 111 if she doesn’t ease up soon. I took a Codeine; that might help… or burst the duodenal ulcer. Fed up? Me? Hehehe.

Oh, Testicles! I took some formatted frame text from CorelDraw to the blog – and lost everything when CorelDraw crashed.
My language was sickening; I was so angry with myself!!! Grumbling, sulking, cursing… Grrr!
It took me over an hour to get it back on track. Then another two hours to get the photographs I prepped for the blog back on from the SD again. Then I start to doctoring them again. and !

What felt like a week later, I got caught up. As if to spoil my pleasure, started again, but at least she gave me a small break… or the CorelDraw disaster may have taken my mind off of her? Then:

So, I’m going to get something to eat, the evening carer will be here in a while. I got some chestnut mushroom on the boil. Added liquid smoke and salt and simmered them for ages. Then got the sausages in the oven.

Lastly, as the other stuff I hoped would be about ready, I heated some Ben’s Korean Style BBQ flavoured rice in the microwave.
This is the first (And Last!) time I’d this flavour. I got the bowl filled with what I thought looked like an appetising meal.
But, Oh, No!
Every single part of the meal tasted so strange, and a flavour rating of 1.5/10 was given after trying to eat it.
The Korean Rice was far too strong for my palette. The mushrooms tasted, I imagine, like leather! The sausages, well, they tasted nothing like the ones out of the same bag that I ate last week? Horrible is the word.
I couldn’t even eat the lemon cheesecake, one spoonful, and I felt sick! I must ask Richard to check the dates in the fridge for me, but he’s so busy.

I dished the more significant part of the meal into a food bag, a freezer bag, and a waste bag. While sealing it all up, I had a mammoth, chest-wrenching sneeze! And since then, has been in attendance! Still with me in the morning as I type this up!

Jodie arrived. Soon got the meds sorted, and I asked her to take my socks off for me, please. Got a raised eyebrow response, but she did remove them, bless her cotton socks. Chose nibbles and a drink in appreciation, taking the black bag with her to the chute as she left.

I took two photos of the view from the kitchenette window in different camera modes/settings.

They seemed to turn out pretty much the same in appearance?

The frames were different shapes.

I got settled in the second-hand, £300, c1968, overwhelmingly-sickeningly beige coloured, tatty, uncomfortable, wobbly-recliner.
The tummy rumbled, and I had to rise to have a wee-wee.
Back into the £300, second-hand, decrepit, Haemorrhoid Harold-testing, sleep deterring, nauseatingly beige-coloured, not-working recliner. And blow me, needed another wee-wee. Up again and over to the NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee-Bucket).
Back yer again into the £300, second-hand bought, c1968, nauseously beige-coloured, not-working, rusty, rickety, crumb-holder of a tatty recliner. Mastered it this time. I was asleep in minutes… Bliss!

Inchcock Today Monday 15th August 2022 – With Ode

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Independence Day for India & Pakistan 1947

Up all night again! Rose from the c1968 recliner went to the NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee-Bucket). Then realised I didn’t need to be there. This was the first time in years that I had not wanted to pass water on waking! Oddly-most?
I knocked nearly everything off of the small ottoman!
This snap was taken after I returned the things onto the top and tray. Turned away and knocked off the two bottles with the walking stick. It could happen to anyone…

I then spent over four hours completing the template for this blog and updating Sundays. Finally got Sunday’s poor effort completed. I posted but had to do so in shorthand. Everything was taking so long to do; time was running out. I’d lost the memory notepad anyway, so even if I had the time, I’d forgotten what had taken place. Good job; there were a few photos on the camera to assist.
Even making the WordPress comments took me well over an hour. And there are only three of them to do. I’m beginning to struggle to see now. Making tons of errors.


I utilised
the blue & white Boot’s Sphygmomanometer, manufactured by ZDEAC (Zhongshan Daguan Electrical Appliance Company Ltd) in Guangdong, China, to take the blood pressure.
SYS 150, DIA 76 and Pulse 75.
My Chinese (Hong Kong) made by Shenzhen Relee Electronic & Technology Co. Ltd™ contactless thermometer was used. With another near-perfect figure showing up. 34.8°f.
The NHS score came up as: ‘
Your blood pressure reading of 150/76 is high. You should check your blood pressure at a GP practice or pharmacy within the next week. I can’t say why, but I thought this reading would be nearer to the amber. Hey, Ho!

A short mechanical concerto from the flat above. A slow build-up using a drill mayhaps finishing with a clattering, then a shuddering clung. Almost musical.

Arrived a little later than usual. The poor lad had been working for over 14 hours. He was yawning a lot, poor lad. But gave me time to listen to my tale of the diabetes farce day at Bulwell.

 I had a stand-up ablutionalisationing session. Some discomfort was involved, but nothing serious compared to the last agony of the Porcelain Throne activity!
❶ Teeth cleaning, these may become my latest ailments, I fear. So tender, teeth breaking up.
❷ The shaving had the usual view nicks, again nowt worrying about.
The cleaning and medicating of rear-end stingers was not too bad,
Both the cleaning and ointmenting of this touchy area were extremely painful. But they are each time.
& combined to give me any shaking, but I avoided toe-stubbing, falls, or banging into anything… 🌟   🌟

The Porcelain Throne was needed as I washed nonchalantly, drying myself off. I was two paces away from me at the time, and I increased my cocky to Grade One. 🌟   🌟
Did I need to have rushed? No! Most painfully, I was still sitting there with what felt like a bazooka-sized shell, half-in and half-out! This caused to bleed profusely and necessitated more sanitising and ointmentasioning! – Treble ! Of course, it didn’t bother me.

Coming out into the hallway, the standoffish, smarmy slob from above gave me a short mechanical blast of noises as if to mock my pain. Has he put a CCTV in my flat? Hehehe!

I got back to the computer and started this blog going. Damned hard work with Doreen and Cataract Kathy both determined that I would not be able to cope with so many errors and cock-ups.
Indeed, they were successful in their mission, For after a few hours, my body and mind were drained. I bet I’ve missed no end of mistakes. Billum pointed some out from the other day. That one involved Arithmaphobic errors. I am struggling. Very frustrated. Would I be able to live without this blog? Ideally, I could leave it alone until after the cataract has been sorted, but… I don’t know.

I stopped and went to make the first brew of the day. Ah, a bag of seaweed crisps with the tea, and just sit and think things through. I intend to have a biscuit, no better not, something less stomach bulging…

Got the kettle on and got side-tracked by noises coming from outside,
I got the Canon and had a look to see if I could find what was making the now stopped din,
Of course, I couldn’t, so I went my get my long-range spectacles,
Could I find them?
No! Dementia Doreen again!
So, I returned to the kitchenette to make the tea. I’d not turned the kettle on.

Put a Quatermass DVD on. Grrreat! More blogging, but only for an hour or so, felt slightly rough, and I sat down in the recliner.
Woke up with the right foot slightly swollen and the right leg more prominent than the left (water retention).  I idly rewound the DVD. and watched some more of the movie. After six rewinds and nodding offs, I gave up and responded to the innards’ rumblings – off to the wet room.  
This session was painful and bloody, just like yesterday’s – but, Hey-Ho!, less of both! 🌟   🌟

As I got back into the front room, I espied signs of Nibbling in my Sleep! Empty, and a partially-full packet of Leicester Cheese flavoured Mini-Cheddars, and a few crumbs. Some suspected of being from the Shiitake mushrooms and Seaweed crisps, but there were no signs of any empty bags.

Hello, Mr Snotty has started on a series of tap-tapping, mostly followed by a thud. Musical Genius, he is!

Got the computer on to update today’s blog, then started on the next News Snippets blog. Oh, look at the time! Where did it all go?

An unintentional little lie lays there above. I got a bout of ditheringisations, pondering and divagating… and changed my mind; (Doreen Dementia allows me to at times). And I ended up working on a new file of Ode words with different endings. For hours! Though I do enjoy it.

Some silly-time in the morning now, going to get some even more belated nosh now.

I poddled off to the fridge to see what choices were in there for a nosh… I think I may have a live-in, or burglar, helping themselves to the fodder. Where’s it all gone? Most likely, Doreen confusing me again.

Surely I’ve not eaten all that stuff? Or did I? All those sliced potatoes, I can only remember eating one of them?
As I opened the freezer, the memory triggered. A rare thing, you know! I take it all back! I gave some to the Carers, and one was out of date.
Got some nosh sorted and two new mushroom steaks, each eaten in a brown cob, with the last of the salad and some BBQ sauce.
The mushroom steaks were not a scratch on the No-Bull burgers. Which Iceland have replaced with these horrible tasteless turds.

Samantha arrived and gave me the medications. Didn’t want a treat; she was busy, bless her. Sarah took the waste bags to the bin on her way out for me.

I tried to watch the Widowmaker film on the telly. Fell asleep so many times it was farcical. So off with the TV, and I was soon in a deep sleep. A weird dream was enjoyed.

Inchcock’s Ode: Talking with my ailments – Part Two

Talking with my ailments

Introduction:

Part Two – Shaking Shoulder Shirley

After Inchcock was diagnosed with Peripheral Neuropathy, he then got told he was a diabetic. Then had a stroke. (He’s a lucky lad… Not!) Next, a Subconjuntival Haemorrhage in his right eye.

Then while recovering in an NCH (Nottingham City Homes) Care Home, Shaking-Shoulder-Shirley introduced herself. He presumes this is due to the (Nicodemus’s) Nerve ends dying. But the occasional Neuropathy Pete’s shuddering, shaking and jerking of the right side of his body and limbs rarely last for more than a few minutes at max. Usually, Shirley is a lot more violent for some unknown reason and can wear the old man down when she’s persistent. Shaking and lashing about. Her efforts recently have increased somewhat, time-wise, and Inchcock says, “After a long hour or so session, I’m convinced she is trying to wrench my humeral head bone free of the socket” Oh, and Inchcock also needed three stitches in a shaving cut!

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The Nocturnal Natter with Shirley

A mixture of awake, half-asleep, and dreamt discussions, wrote from notes and during the actual multiple chin-waggings…

Inchcock: I’m not sure why or how you came about… Shirley: Ha!, now you talk to me; I’m not as important as Bloody Boris bladder then, what’s that about?
Inchcock: Whaddya mean about?
Shirley: Yo started this ‘ere Talking to yer ailments series of blogs off wiv him… not me, who is far more painful indeed… innit, no doubt?
Inchcock: Well… it depends which ailment is worst at the time… giving me the severest clot…
Shirley: Argh, shurrup! You’ll know now why I’ve been giving the jerks and aches then? Cause yer doesn’t rate me was mean enough… yer, I’ll put yer in more pain than gout!
Inchcock: I wouldn’t and don’t doubt your pain-giving qualities at all; I’m already in pain, tired and worn-out!
Shirley: I suppose Bartholomew give it more to you?
Inchcock: Well, he has been lasered and still works,
Shirley: Cum on mush, look how yers treated me, bad or not!
Inchcock: I massage you twice a day with Phorpain gel
Shirley: Not like you, an old fart that still drinks bottled stout! Yer just an ungrateful old trout!
Inchcock: I…
Shirley: And another thing, I’ve never let the shoulder joint fall out!
Inchcock: Well, I doubt…
Shirley: I’ll tell yer to wot you done to me int past, Inured me you have, I remember the Colwick security stakeout!
Inchcock: Go one then, tell me all about it… it won’t make me freak out!
Shirley: Now yer makin’ me want to puke and pout!
Inchcock: Pout? Why? What about?
Shirley: Oh! Yer not bovvered about me puking then, yer an emotional wash-out!
Inchcock: I remember now, Shirley, Colwick, when we did an overnight lookout…
Shirley: Ah, year, that’s wot it was about!
Inchcock: When I was using the night goggles, from the back of the van… and from it, I fell out, giving you a good clout?
Shirley, you landed in a field, and blood did spout…
Inchcock: Blood? Who’s? No, surely not?
Shirley: It was me, and you bleeding.. have you no memory left or what?
Inchcock: Erm…
Shirley: The burglars arrived? You felt around in the dark for the R.T., went out of the van to take a nighttime photo, missed the step.., and fell on me! What an idiot!
Inchcock: Ah, yes… I fell on a broken tin pot…
Shirley: And it cut me! And you still never got the I.D. shot!

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Notes made for later use…

In the afternoon, Inchcock: Fell asleep…

Shirley: Oi, you Inchie! Are you ready to have anuvver talk wiv me?
Inchcock: Well, I’d like for me…
Shirley: Don’t tell me, you’re back on the Drambuie?
Inchcock: No, no, no, I don’t drink anymore…
Shirley: Sounds like an oxymoron, yer fibbing, you see…
Inchcock: No, I’m not, you’ve been hanging around for over seventy-odd years, must have noticed, so you must indeed acquiesce, concede, and agree?
Shirley: Oh, trying to get clever with words, I see?
Inchcock: Why are you so nasty and sarkie?
Shirley: Me? I’ll tell yer why, dumbo! In left Shoulder Lilly, never, always me, that’s what causes my incongruity! Why is it always me the doctors stick the hypos in?
Inchcock: Now look, we’ve grown old together, Shirley…
Shirley: Yea!
Inchcock: We’ve been through some tough times, we all suffer, Duodenal Donald, Anne Gyna, Reflux Roger, Deaf Darren, Hemorrhoidal Harold, Saccades Sandra all of them, oh, and Toothache Tiffany…
Shirley: Enough of this claptrap mush! But I do wish you well with this little ditty!
Inchcock: She suddenly returned into the ether; what a pity!

Time To Get An Iceland Order Done, methinks

A bit bare, innit?