The following letter, sent in by Mr Dense Inchcock of Nottingham was received by the Nottingham City Council Parking Services, Loxley House, Station Street, Nottingham. NG2 3NG. Obviously of a spurious content and intention, Mr Inchcock thought perhaps it may start a bit of humorous banter twixt himself and Traffic Department personnel… but no!

We could not help but see the bitter-sweet side to this letter; however, the Council Officials obviously could not.

Inchcock’s Letter;

Dear Sir,

I went into your wonderful city last Tuesday, in my 1969 Austin Allegro registration W234 TIT, and after three hours managed to find a parking space within walking distance of the NHS drop in centre, where I was visiting about a medical concern.

I purchased a ticket for two hours to be on the safe side, not wanting to cause any bother to your wonderful Parking monitoring personnel, and walked the four minute route to the centre.

After being seen by the nurse in attendance, she called for an ambulance straight away, after finding a problem with my heart. An ambulance was summoned, and I was transported to the QMC hospital, where, after checks and being prescribed medication, I was released several hours later.

Thus, making it eight hours before I could return to my car. To my amazement, I could find no parking ticket or penalty notice on the vehicle, or after searching the streets, nearby.

Understandably, I am riddled with guilt, and full of contrition.

Considering my reprehensible actions, I would like to beg and entreat you to correct the situation, by issuing me with a penalty notice, forthwith ASAP.

I hope this will relieve my deeply felt remorse, and overpowering self-reproach. Yours Dense Inchcock.

The authority’s response was:

Dear Inchcock, Regarding your appeal received (date).

The Traffic Management Act 2004 sets out grounds on which you make representations to the Council. These are shown below:

* The recipient had never owned the vehicle

* The recipient had ceased to be its owner before the date on which the alleged contravention occurred

* The recipient became its owner after the date on which the alleged contravention occurred

* The alleged contravention did not occur

* The vehicle was stolen at the time of the offence (documentary proof from the police will be required)

* The relevant Traffic Regulation Order is invalid

* The owner of the vehicle is a Hire firm and the hirer has signed a statement of liability for any Penalty Charge Notices. (In this case the hirer will be held to be liable and the city council will proceed against the hirer)

* The amount of the Penalty Charge exceeds the appropriate amount. (In practice this has been correctly approved by the Council and the Department of Transport, so any challenge is unlikely to be successful)

* There has been a procedural impropriety by the enforcement Authority

* The Notice to owner should not have been served because the Penalty Charge Notice have already been paid

* Unfortunately the Penalty Charge will not be cancelled in these circumstances. It is the motorist’s responsibility to purchase enough time to cover the duration of the parking time required, allowing for any possible over-running of meetings or appointments. In these situations it is advisable to use a car park where payment is made upon return (like Trinity Square, Broadmarsh or Fletcher Gate)

* If you have been issued with a Penalty Charge Notice (“Parking Fine”) please be aware that Civil Enforcement Officers have no authority to cancel them. We accept the following types and methods of payment:

By cheque:

Please make payable to Nottingham City Council and send to Nottingham City Council Parking Services, Lawrence House, Talbot Street, Nottingham, NG1 5NT By card: Please visit us at Nottingham City Council Parking Services, Lawrence House, Talbot Street, Nottingham, NG1 5NT and we will take your card payment by chip and pin and provide you with a receipt.

By Postal Order:

Please visit your local post office and obtain a postal order. The order should be made payable to Nottingham City Council and should be sent to Nottingham City Council Parking Services, Lawrence House, Talbot Street, Nottingham, NG1 5NT. You can find your nearest Post office by visiting http://www.postoffice.co.uk and clicking on the Branch Finder tab. Details of how to pay are also shown on the reverse of the Notice.

Yours: Mr J Obsworth JP – Nottingham City Council, Clerical & Legal Chief Executive Officer.

Now Dense Inchcock is really confused!