Inchcock Today – Sat 14 Sept 19: Nonarbitrary Whoopsiedangleplops and nervosity!

Saturday 14th September 2019

Afrikaans: Saterdag 14 September 2019

02:15hrs: I woke up in urgent need of a wee-wee, and after only 2 hrs kip as well, Humph and Globleturds! Out of the Brother-in-Law Pete damaged while he was flat-sitting, when I was in hospital, as he fitted new CCTC cameras, and searched for my valuables, which he found and took, (I still haven’t got them back yet four-months later), £300, second-hand, near-dilapidated, gungy-beige coloured, c1968, sometimes working, uncomfortable, rickety, rinky-dinked, rattling, rusty, resurrected, reconditioned, recalcitrant, recidivating and rotting-away recliner, over to the GPEB (Grey-Plastic-Emergency-Bucket) for a wee-wee. Which proved to be yet again of the INHBBT (I-needn’t-have-bothered-barely-trickling) mode.

I opted to go and get the handwashing wrung-out and hung. Argh! A toe-stubbing of a particularly sensitive nature was taken en route. What a Klutz of a Schmendrick!

I hung the shirt above the heater. Got the kettle on and took the medications. While doing this, I decided I’d have BBQ seasoned rice and bacon for the meal later. Then I got on with updating the Friday post. Which, with many, (All of the INHBBT variety) wee-wees, and stoppages for a false alarm Porcelain visit. I’m nervous after yesterdays blockage. 

I got the peas in the saucepan, but unfortunately, I left the heat on and not realised! I went back to computerisationing for about two hours, and the smell of burning, made me jumped up and rush to the kitchen…

Stubbing the same toe again on the way! Grrr!

I think I may have ruined the new saucepan! Treble-Humph and Globleturds! I think I might be able to save the peas, though, I don’t mind them burnt. Off again for yet another failed evacuation.

This time I noticed how the legs were looking; damned pale, warped and white, with the muscles looking contracted, and the toe was hurting something awful! More Humphs and Globleturds!

I finally got the post finished and sent off to WordPress.

Then I thought it would be a good idea to get caught up with the TFZer Facebooking. Ha! I was on it for over three hours! (because I was so far behind! Tsk!) But it was so nice to get caught up for a change. This being a Saturday, no health, Nottingham City Homes, shopping or physio appointments to get in the way. I loved getting it done. But it will probably be next Saturday before I can catch-up again.

I then realised I had not started this blog off yet! So I did!

I thought about the nosh then, I was getting a bit hungry. As for making up the templates, they will have to wait, or be done each day.

I got the fodder sorted and checked on the long sleeve t-shirt hanging up. It was very nearly dry already! Then it dawned on me what time it was! Almost my head-down time! A good job the rice will take little time to cook. Back to the food preparations.

The saucepan had in it a grand selection of my favourites for me to feast on! Uncle Ben’s BBQ flavour rice. Burnt until they had black spots on the fresh garden peas! Plenty of tomato slicer-sliced brown Sicilian tomatoes. Smoked streaky bacon rashers.

With a drop or two of extra virgin olive oil, Texas BBQ sauce, and an eighth of a small silverskin onions, & some tip-top, but expensive Morrison’s 45% balsamic vinegar.

Once all in the saucepan, it only took four minutes to cook, (an hour to prepare, mind. Ha-ha!) (Ten-minutes to check everything was turned off or not left on.) My aboulomania showing itself again!

I settled in the Brother-in-Law, Pete destroyed, c1968, recliner, and feasted on this divine meal, with its vinegariness adding the master-stroke to the taste! A taste-rating of 8/10! I believe the brown tomatoes helped the overall flavour, too.

As I stood up to take the utensils to be washed, the innards kicked off postprandial. I did think that the Porcelain Throne was to be used at last! But, no! Much malevolent, worrying, and threatening of severe activity from my intestinal department burst forth! At the same time, after the last evacuation caused a blockage in the toilet, part of me did not want the event to happen. Oh, dear!  Dippydro that I am, I changed my mind – it has to come again eventually, surely. So even if it causes plumbing mayhem, I now wanted the release to come. Not that my wishes came into it, for the uncomfortable blockage ensured there was no need for any Porcelain Thronal activity!

As I was cleaning the equipment, I was like a proper deipnosophist; but talking only to myself. (Well I would, with no one else about. Hehe!) The subjects mused-over were of no particular value, importance or even interest.

Then while scouring away at the pots, it dawned on me that I had managed to get the new saucepan that the peas were burnt in, eviscerated. Amazing! It may have been the Fairy Liquid I’m currently using instead of the cheapo ones I usually purchase?

I got down in the Brother-in-Law Pete destroyed by his nosing into things electrical, £300, c1968, grungy-beige recliner. I could sense I was going to have difficulty in getting to sleep again. It was hours beyond my head-down time, now. So, I turned on the television, got the headphones on and working, (all trial & error, you know! Humph!), and part-watched some TV. I found that Rumpole of the Bailey was on, two back-to-back episodes, which cheered me up initially. I watched the first one until the adverts came on, nodded-off, and woke up as the second one was finishing and the credits screen rolling. That was it for sleep, until well gone midnight. The mind-mused, fears, worries, frustrations and embarrassments came to the fore… No Throne activity, no sleep, no…

Well, it doesn’t matter. For such a loud crunching sound came from somewhere nearby, followed by the whining or humming noise starting! I had to get up to investigate. I checked every room (All three of them!) in the flat. Had a look out of the window for any signs of activity, but found nothing untoward? But I did get the pleasure of taking three photos of the astonishingly coloured sky!

I had a drink of spring water and took the evening medications that I’d missed taking earlier. Got back down in the grotty, Brother-in-Law Pete knackered recliner.

As I lay there, waiting for, hoping for and praying for sleep to come, slowly the eye-lids grew heavier, and: ‘Thwack!’ It almost sounded like the wings of a giant bird taking off. This time, I ignored the noise… at first! But I just had to go and have a check around later, when the ‘Thwacking’ was heard again! Nothing was found as to the reason or cause of the sudden crisp, loud noise?

Ah, the Mysteries of my beloved Woodthorpe Court, that lies somewhere between the twilight zone and a wormhole slipping through a tear in the fabric of space & the spacetime continuum. With illusion, delusion, fascination and hallucination, being rife!

• Not to mention the NCH’s plumbers giving me the floods, and my having to throw away my clothing from the soaked-through airing cupboard and buy new ones.
• The infestation of the EIBWBBBs (Evil Ironclad Boll-Weevil black biting beetles) in just the one flat, mine!
• The Fire Alarm that I cannot hear, as can’t many other tenants.
• Willott Dixon plasterer, who left plaster splashed and trodden on, all over the carpets, chairs, curtains, frames and doors, my being left with them in need of costly replacements.
• The electricians fitting the new Fire Sprinklers, who cut off my electricity for over nine hours that cost me in lost food in the freezer!
• The new intercom set-up, which came with instruction photographs that were different than the actual ones in layout.
• The new intercom set-up, that the ring tone, cannot be heard by me if I am not in the hallway, and see it light-up as well. Many other tenants say the same thing.
• The new intercom set-up, which the view of the caller is often replaced with ‘Camera Fault’ message. (If it works at all!)
  
• The new intercom set-up, not being heard, and often not working at all, I, and many others, have missed deliveries, visitors etcetera, on many an occasion.
• The NCH bloke, who filled the air vent, left, I went out to the Doctors for my INR Warfarin blood test. When I returned, the foam had run down the wall and covered my electric socket, and turned as hard as iron and browny-red. Now the plug outlet can’t be used, for fear of electrocution! Even murderers don’t have to live with this threat!
  
• Those mystery noises in the night and day! Droning, rustling, tap-tapping, whistling, throbbing, and most disconcerting to listen to. Baffling, perplexing and annoying at times.
• The joy of the new windows in the kitchen and balcony. That cannot be reached to be cleaned, without the use of the stepladders, which I have tumbled off of, on four occasions. Jenny did her best to get the new window cleaner chap for me. He called, said he would see me Saturday AM. That was three weeks ago. Heard nothing since.
  

There is no doubt about it, moving into this flat, was mayhem. Living in this flat is fear-making, nerve-jangling, and fraught-festering. But, the alarm wristlet probably saved my life when I had the stroke! The two Nottingham City Homes ladies who came to do an updated, saved the day after I’d toppled over cleaning the kitchen. They immediately picked me up and showed great empathy and understanding of my predicament and problems. Thanks again, ladies ♥

I love it here!