ALL THE MISTAKES IN THE ODE ABOVE WERE NATURALLY INTENTIONAL. Ahem!
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I woke and had to force myself not to nod off again. The ablutionisationing just had to be done early today. So as to try and get the Sunday blog finished and get through the marathon shower[shaving and shi…, erm Porcelain Throne Sessioning done. get dressed and all the paperwork etc., ready for the trip to the hospital done in time. A challenge? Yes!
But for a man of my calibre, brave, sophisticated, on the point of being heroic. Such a challenge is welcome. Yes, a two-hour-plus struggle, yet I relish such things. Indeed, I crave them!
Please bear in mind I have not yet taken my medications.
On fumbling my way free of the clutches and crumb-containing aged, grotty-looking c1966 made, charity-shop-bought, horribly beige-coloured, £300, Harold’s Haemorrhoid-testing, non-operational, acne-giving, virus-breeding, rickety, easy-to-fall-out-of recliner…
Signs of much nocturnal nibbling having taken place were found on and around the waste bin at the side of the chair. Ahem!
I tackled the night bag detached.
A smidge dark, traces of some blood in there?
The bag was filling up quickly, but it looked a slightly better colour.
I was planning to shower, so I thought I’d get rid of some urine in case it came on again while I was in the shower.
The teggies were done, and I got my feet in the bowl on the floor soaking in Dettol and was about to start shaving… the was suddenly needed. So it was to be – But what a messy affair!
Of course, by the time I’d cleaned things up, the water in the bowl had gone cold. No problem, I’ll empty it down the WC and refill it… Did I say No Problem? I dropped the bowl. Had to clean things up again, but I was undaunted. Little did I know what dropsies lay in wait for me later in the day, as well! I got the shaving done with only three little cuts,
I reached up to close the shower curtain…
I felt a little discomfort in the armpit… I got the camera to try and get a photo of it…
A right red mark in there, and all the hairs had disappeared???
Was dried off with paper towels.
All looked well with the contraption.
I got things medicated, dropping the ear-holes olive oil and spilling much of it on the floor. Got dressed and off to the kitchen to get the kettle on. I knocked the saucepan off of the stove top when I dropped the milk bottle… I have to report that; There’s more to come later… Tsk!
I took a reasonably decent photo of the blue morning view.
arrived. Got the medications done, but he did not look very well. I felt guilty asking him to help in putting my socks on. Poor lad looked proper poor;y to me. Fingers crossed for him. He a grand chap.
I got the paperwork checked, including the times of the lift. Got myself downstairs to wait for the Easy-Lift minibus. Jenny was down there sorting some of her charity work to be collected, bless her cotton socks. Lovely to see her. The van arrived, and the lady got me to the hospital with no bother. Thank you.
I’d not taken the camera with me, cause it’s bigger than the new ones and would be awkward to use and keep safe. I got these two photos from the web when I got home.
I got inside and joined the queue for the receptionist. A nice lady greeted me, and I gave her the paperwork, which she checked, and told me someone e would be down to see me shortly. I thanked her and moved into a seat as instructed. Remembered that I’d not got my mask on (Covid), so got it on post-haste. After a minute or two, Mr Mann came to me, checked m name and commanded (I’m not joking), to follow him, which was not easy as he’d got a good rate of speed on him. Into his office, sat down, and I was out and going back to the reception in… I’d estimate five minutes max.
He got annoyed when I could not hear what he was saying. But he only asked me three questions anyway. I think they were; how long have you had the catheter on? 8-9 weeks! Have you had a bladder scan? Yes! He asked a third question that I had to guess.
Then he said; That’s it then; we’ll see how you go when they take it off. You’ll not see me again! Very nice!
Back to the reception area to await the lift home. It was due in about an hour or so. I got the pen and crossword book out and gave it a go for gouty minutes or so. It was hard work reading the clues, but I enjoyed it. Even if I didn’t get many answers, it kept my brain going.
I got the pains in Little Inchie, and I knew that the catheter bag must be full and filling the tube with nowhere to go. I couldn’t check it, because it would mean taking off my trousers.
I thought I’d join the queue again to ask if it was possible for me to use the WC to empty the bag. But the kind lady who greeted me came over to me and asked if I was waiting for a lift or do I want her to call anyone. Kind! I explained my unfortunate condition, and she got two… I say two nurses who took me to the closet and emptied the pouch ♥!
Not only that, but as I was about to go with them, the Easy Link minibus arrived. The kind lady said you get your bag seen to; I’ll tell the diver what’s happening. She made me feel important. Unlike the Doctor, who knew I was an NHS imposter and had no qualms about looking and talking down to me.
The two nurses, by the way, I think, were in the photo from the web. Fourth and sixth from the left. ♥♥♥
The driver, chappie, was patient with me and soon had me back at the flats. I gave him drinkies from the three-wheeled-walker trolley basket.
I met Carer Carol-Anne in the lift.
She sorted the meds for me..
Dropped a mug of tea!
All clean up.
Peed off now!
Started A pan of vegetable stew.
Knocked the knife box off of the ledge when taking photos.
Knocked the box off!!!
Great space-related shots? Hehe!
Time for Food!
Oh, no, it isn’t!
Arrived. Very tired and not looking well at all, poor lad. He got the night pouch attached to the , and he gave me some Peptac. I got him a cold drink of spring water to help cool him down. Richard was sweating and had a croaking voice. I fear he may have to rest and see his doctor soon. Fingers crossed!
Hope he can get through the day; bless him.
Time for Food!
It started with a can of cheapo Asda vegetable soup and a can of tomatoes. I seasoned it with some BBQ marinade, sea salt & Oxo cubes. I added some peas and potatoes from the slow cooker. Then cooked some potato cubes in the oven until nice and crispy (the ones that Richard rescued as he arrived), crispy hard on the outside, and added them to the saucepan of vegetable delights. It was a struggle getting it prepared, what with the four-pronged walking stick and carrying the night pouch about with me. I did manage one more , spilt some soup on the kitchen floor while dishing it up.
Not that it bothered me or got me grinding my teeth, cursing venomously, encouraged self-loathing, nearly making me cry, or spitting blood…
Then, the feasting started!
Somehow or other, I ate the entire bowlful, and it was a large bowlful.
I enjoyed it and even went into the kitchen afterwards to wash the dishes and check if anything had been missed in my previous cleaning up.
All went well… apart from I’d left the cold tap running, the hob heat on and dropped and broke the sauce pot washing up.
ARGH! An irritated, self-annoyed Inchie could then not get off to sleep… well, not for ages, anyway. Grrr!