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Gotten Himmel & Cragknangles!
Am I ever going to get any better? The obvious answer is no!.
Dementia Doreen is the worst problem. Because people just do not understand… I don’t understand! Why do I do so many things okay, one minute, then I lose it. I may get a Mind-Blank, which is scary even to me… but not until I realise I’ve had one. Then the depressions start. But not for long. Why can’t I realise that the memory is going to affect me, or lack of it and confusion in the head? Numbers, letters (Mail), dates, and times all get jumbled up – thus, I can’t even rely on myself to grasp, hold on to things, and wander off physically and mentally at times. Taking two hours, and finding the time too as well, to get the shower shaving done??? Times I feel I’m almost in charge… but, of course, the question is, Am I actually?
People do not realise the lack of control and ability to cope.
That’s without taking into account the Catheter, bladder, prostate, tumbling and falls, cataracts, Glaucoma, Saccades, deafness, and Peripheral Neuropathy with its balance and leg dances ever-threatening.

Shaking Shaun, Dizzy Dennis, the Mystery Rib Pains, Little Inchies struggle with the Phimosis, inserted tube and his fungal lesion bleeding, Duodenal Donald, Haemorrhoid Harold, and Anne Gyna. And my fear of paperwork, Reflux Roger, and Confusion Konrad through not retaining any details, making notes, and just forgetting about them. I’m not coping well.

The first brain scan is on Friday – wonder if they’ll find one in there? Yet sometimes, I seem to be sharp-witted, but that is soon frittered away. The bad moments seem to stay longer… or ~I think they do. My confidence is shattered. I’m up and down all the time. In and out of logicalness, caring and then not caring. Frustrated and get so angry with myself when I lose events and have no idea what has taken place. What I was about to do… this crap I’m writing is coming easily, flowing from my mind… Why?

Just thought I’d mention it, like.

I suppose if, or rather when, it gets worse, it won’t bother me so much? But the thought of going into a home… I don’t think I could allow that. Then again, would I realise it if it happened?

No diary but some photos. More or less in order of events.

Up, emptied and removed the , and emptied washed the bucket, and checked on the urine colouration.

Not too good.

Photographed the morning view.

Got the spuds in the slow cooker and made a brew.
Which I promptly dropped and then got cleaned up to the accompaniment of some self-slandering curse words.

Many, many or more hours later.
After blogging away – Well, I mean making mistakes, errors etc on the blog.
Visits from Carer Charly amid Sam.
I marathon, never had one that took longer – No, that’s a fib, sorry. I had my first barium meal; they forgot to give me the crystals to free things up on the Porcelain Throne. For four hours, I sat sitting in agony. So today’s hour was nothing. I’m sorry I mentioned it now. And many emptying of the catheter day pouch; it is so small…

I did another urine check.
Grrreat!
Carried out the Blood Pressure testing.

For about two hours, boy, did the wee-weeing do well.

I was working on the blog, but that is all I recall.
Mind-Blank again!

Shame about the Sunsetting – it didn’t!
At least it was covered by the clouds.
But I did get some interesting shots…

I can see her in this one…
Took a close-up of her…
And so quickly, she was gone.
Fare Thee Well!

Did the second G~P test.

Oh, ‘eck, not so good today, then?

Got some canned veg soup in the saucepan and flavoured it with some basil, and sea salt. Added baked beans and garden peas…
I know what you are thinking…
“Why did the pillock put peas in with beans?
I’ll tell yers…
I’ve no idea!
Another mind, blank, and when I realised I may have left the pan on, or tap, or stove, or heater… Tsk!
I hastened to the kitchenette to check. And sure enough, I could see the beans and peas in the soup. I added sliced tomatoes, the potatoes from the crockpot, and a sprinkle of basil.
What the hell it will taste like, I don’t know.

Carer Richard arrived. Got the night bag on, and within five minutes as he was sorting the medications, it had filled up almost a third???
We had a little natter, moan and laugh, and off he trotted to his bed.
I had a last go at this blog. Then heated the rather scary-looking pan of vegetable soup with the potatoes and baked means – it didn’t look particularly attractive. Hehehe!

Got some cobs in the oven, and I bravely served up the food in a giant plastic basin. And tackled it!

I ate nearly all of this vegetable stew concoction and two of the bread rolls.
Took me a while to eat it, and I fell asleep part-way through doing so.
A miracle it didn’t fall on the floor!

Zzzz!