In Odes, not good ones… but Odes!
The number of humans on this earth is 7.87 billion at this time…
On the global internet, the users add up to 4,321,740 and 9!
So your chance of your blog going viral is fine…
But don’t expect it, as I did, then found a steady decline!
I hope you do much betterer with thine!
My last one got two likes and comments; one was mine!
It’s Doreen Dementia and Liberty-Global I blame,
It’s fun to me, but it’s all money… a shame!
Their service is as much off as on, and it’s a game…
Farcically, ownership Liberty-Global disclaim!
Telling the call agents not to ever mention their name!
Liberty-Global owns Virgin; the boss should resign!
For Mr Fries knows not what he is doing…
Or though maybe he does, he makes money fine?
It’s overpaying mugs like me that he’s screwing…
His bosses think that everything is fine…
With Fries shadowy, manipulative money moving,
All on paper, mist and mirrors… this profit maker-divine!
A gorgeous gal wanted me in the early hours of this morning…
Of course, I knew that I was probably dreaming,
This very fact, I found a little perturbing…
She insisted on closer, passionate probing,
To my delight, she was acquiescing…
We were soon manipulating and bouncing,
She was ready and asked for another trouncing,
No problem for me, and I began eagerly disrobing,
But my performance, I think, was unconvincing…
Surely she should have been rejoicing?
And as her knickers, she was replacing…
I attempted some more romantic seducing…
I found it embarrassing what she was saying…
“I’ll not call again; there was no pain – Where’s this leading?
I’m just glad I was only dreaming!
– 
I thought the visit before was on the wet side…
But this evacuation was even more undignified
I failed to get there on time, my aim was wide…
I cleaned things up, taking it all in my stride,
In doing this, I felt an iota of pride!
Cleaned, refreshed, but I went from Jekyll to Hyde,
As I started to get things all antisepticised…
I dropped the Germoloid after it had been applied…
And trod on it, swore, and boy, how I did self deride!
The contents squirted all over, and my frustration intensified!
But this Throne visit had yet another downside to it…
Leaving the wet room, I misjudged the width a little bit,
Missed hitting into the frame; I gave myself a little merit!
Stubbed my toe on the airer; fell, hitting under my armpit!
All this cause I urgently needed a flipping sh__!
Thought Storms Erupted
The Thought-Storms erupted, irking, they attacked,
Insults, fears, and failures were lurking and squirted…
Self-loathing, diffidence, vacillation were not appreciated
New worries, old ones, insecureness… amalgamated!
It’s Thought-Storms like this that are most hated!
The cause of the forebodings could not be authenticated,
For reasons, causes, I waited and waited, breath abated…
Nothing was solved, understood or elucidated…
The logic-testing thoughts, endlessly circumlocuted,
My mind was failing, nervous and bloviated!
My resistance was worn down, crumbling, it wilted…
My own thoughts could not be filtered…
However, slowly the tormenting mind vegetated,
Which was good; the brain needed to be rested…
Along came a new wave of dichotomies to be wherrited!
Inchcock Thought Storms – In Ode
,
Midweek photographicalisations, of the sky, from the kitchenette. Well, I think they are anyway. They could be from earlier in the week or not, maybe. This one was taken close u to the window glass.
An early evening view? Possibly, an afternoon shot. 
this one already, Tsk! Assuredly an evening or early morning picture of the moon. Not a good one, but it was the best I could do at the time.
A midweek meal? Or thereabouts, methinks. I wonder if I ate it all? I recall the sausages having very tough skins for some reason. A much-belated taste rating: 6.5/10.
Now I can remember taking this one! Not when, though. I know I had an idea to use the two puffer clouds with CorelDraw to put two eyes over them. Thought it might be fun? Of course, not getting the photos to load put the mockers on that idea!
A late morning photograph this time. The sun coming up from the back of the flat complex casts a shadow over Chestnut Walk, the bottom field, and some households will lose their sunshine for a while.
Aha, I know these ones. This first one is the Iceland Foods delivery, which came while Car Richard was with me, on, erm… er… I’ll look at the Carer roster. Richards came on Mon, Tue, Wed and Thursday, so 
it’ll be one of those days. (See how quick I was there?) Hahaha!
Getting the food away in the freezer was a work of art and took me an hour. Some of the things had to be emptied out of the packaging, or they would never have fitted in!
Each time I opened another cardboard box, it needed constant moving.
Humph! What a farce. I’d forgotten all about this contrariety. Pity I actually remembered it when I saw the photographs. I was trying to rush to get the things n before they melted. I took bits of the flesh of my fingers in the rush…
Ah, that night’s meal. Fish fingers, fishcakes, buttered potatoes, yellow and red tomatoes, potato waffles, a banana and two lemon cakes. Haha! Not too bad, a nosh. Taste Rating: 8.8/10.
Evening photograph, judging from where the sun is, I’d guesstimate the time as around 19:00hrs. Puffer clouds were 
Last night methinks, but it could have been from
Hello, Mr Nice from above has started early this morning. I reckon it is something heavy he’s making today. I hope he doesn’t hurt himself too much. Ahem! Cause the clunks and thuds were louder, a lot of drilling noises followed along with the usual tap-tapping and odd thunderclap clunk, here and there later on.
No bread was delivered, but as they pointed out, I requested no substitute. Like last time, they’d sent me potato pancakes in place of bread?
Richard departed, leaving a confused Inchcock, Perplexed; ① as to how he thought they coming tomorrow, not today? ② How they could send something with a sell-by date of the same day? ③ The cream cakes were mashed up together in the box! ④ And the daffodils (Jenny and Francis treats) had petals knocked off of them! 
I’d finished, got new PPs on and dressed, Dizzy Dennis had joined me, and my vision was blurred for some reason? 
So, I did the blood pressure to see if anything was out of sync. Well, 
the blood pressure was acceptable. The Pulse was a smidge high, but only a tiny bit so. The body temperature was lowish, 35°c is my target, and it was 33.7°c. Again, it was so low as to cause concern. I thought about it; what had caused this funny spell? Then gave up.
I found myself sitting on the £300, c1968, second-hand, charity shop-bought, eyesorely-horrendously grungy coloured, haemorrhoid-testing, unfit-for-use, not working recliner, with the TV on? No idea? What happened during the intervening hours…
Initially, I panicked a bit, and got up, grabbed Metal Micky, and started having a search around Sherlockian style. Worried that any heat, taps (faucets), stove hobs or oven had been left on.
I felt hunger pangs brewing up. So off to the kitchenette and started on a had a cooking session. 
It was turning dark quickly tonight. Ten minutes after taking the first shot, I took this second picture of the same scene. 
I turned to put the saucepan on the draining board and gave myself one hell of toe-stubbing on the wheel of the server trolley! My language was a smidgeon blue and self derogatory in nature! 
05:40hrs: I blinked myself awake and waited for the eyesight to clear. And realised how good I felt this morning. Well, as good as I could manage. The brain fogginess and dizzies had departed! Yee-Ha! I’d had a decent kip for once and was with it more today. How long for, I didn’t want to go into!
The toe from last night’s stubbing and falling saucepan landing on it had left me with a new limping style. Hahaha! Yet I still gave myself a toe-stubbing on the same digit as I left the wet room, against the doorframe edge. Humph! But it was not a bad one. I got dressed, put the kettle on, and had to go back to the wet room to visit and utilise the Porcelain Throne
No doubt about it, Constipation Conrad was in full charge of the operation this morning! It was a long time before any activity started, and when it did, an awfully long and painful input from me was needed to literally force things out! So, I had a go at the crosswording, the old book.
Went to make a brew of Glengettie tea in the kitchen.
But at least the body temperature was a little higher this morning, close to its official target of 35°c for once.
must have been for me to hear it.
I took another photo to the right, of the end car park.
Took a photo (All of these were taken through the glass... too cold to stick my head outside and get the flat filled with snowflakes). Hahaha! Of the front car park on Chestnut Walk.
Snowflake was my nickname in the Meadows boxing club. I’m not sure why I bothered mentioning that?
The snowing stopped, leaving a thin coating that gave the bottom field an eerie look, especially for April! (Nearly) Haha!
Back to the flat, and the weather looked slightly different when I got in. The wind seemed to have dropped, and the snow had melted away into the earth and ether.
could smell petrichor as if it had been raining?
After an hour or so of computing, well, I say computing? It was more like making errors, forgetting details, getting things wrong, hitting the wrong buttons, and getting even more wee’d off! The weather changed again.
Made a start on this blog at long last. I got carried away on WordHippo, updating my words to use list… Suddenly, my mind was full of Cognitive biases and guilt. Why?
Humph! I went to make another brew. I took another wee-wee… they have been persistent again today, even though I’ve cut down on my Glengettie drinking a lot today. No, honestly!
The skies had altered again and were blue with almost white small puffer clouds.
Waiting for the kettle to boil, I took a clearer photo of the Chestnut Way end car park and red-van-mans parking. Well, he’s pretty consistent; you have to give him credit!
He’s been consistent today; although I’m worried about him now, he’s gone all quiet? Maybe he’s gone to an AA meeting? Or a Masonsonic Lodge meeting? Mafia get together? Or he is having a chat with Putin?
Well, I found I’d had three official-looking letters had been delivered. These make me nervous, you know. They always require me to make phone calls without considering my deafness or Doreen’s Dementia. Nottingham City Homes, Pegasus Police and Queens Medical Centre Eye clinic – Re Cataracts assessment! Two appointments for 3rd May! Now I’ll have to find out where and how to get there. But I was generally cheered by the news.
I took a half-decent shot from the kitchen window. Showing the further change in the weather… it looked so pretty now.
The extra crispy chips were marvellous, sprinkled with spirit vinegar and Worcester sauce. But, nothing would make the last of the fresh garden peas taste any good, but I did add a bit of sugar while cooking them – it didn’t so much. The tomatoes went down okay. Each round of the cheapo beef slices was eaten within a portion of milk roll bread. I was so keen on consuming the unostentatious meal I forgot to photograph it. So I did part-way through eating it. Oh, I did enjoy it! Flavour Rating: 8/10; I’d have given it a higher score, but for the crap tasting Kenyan peas.
Doing the washing up, I was belching with delight. Haha!
Made up a bottle of spring water, added a drop of orange cordial to it, and whistled to myself; as I checked on the taps (faucets), I was tickled with the actioning of help with the cataracts. Albeit not for a few weeks yet. Checked the electrics and wet room. Then, I meandered almost casually with Metal-Mickey, to the £300, second-hand, c1968, charity shop-bought, eyesorely-horrendously grungy coloured, haemorrhoid-testing, easily-falloutable, unfit-for-use, not working, recliner. My intentions were to get in with Sweet Morpheus as soon as possible…
Haveth a great day!
There was much handling of things in washing and cleaning; poor Little Inchies’
I finally got around to taking the Blood Pressure. A fine set of figures they were too! SIA 144, DIA 48 and Pulse at 72… No, hang on. The DIA’s a good bit low… I’ll check it out.
No, that’s not too bad, only just in the red area anyway. For some reason, the low DIA brought it up overall a smidgeon. I’ve had it a lot worse than that. Last week one day, it was Sys 171, so I’m not fretting.
I used my Chinese (Hong Kong) made by Shenzhen Relee Electronic & Technology Co. Ltd™, contactless thermometer. The result was a bit higher this time, almost on the target figure of 35!
I then spent hours trying to get the Card Reader to work to get the photos on the computer. I was at the limit of my patience and know-how of what else I could try… and wallah! The card suddenly returned to working mode? Although there have been odd, weird times when it tells me the reader is not recognised. So frustrating, I lost hours on the day messing about, turning everything off and back on, the card in and out of the slot… swearing, and at one point, I almost cried!
Time for a mug of Glengettie! 
My sociable, kind, understanding, compassionate, snotty-nosed neighbour above started his clunking, banging noises with some venom. I think he’s realised he was not so bad yesterday and is making up for it?
The sky turned into a bright blue; I’m glad I caught it with the Canon cause minutes later, it had turned back into a bright pale blue shade. It turned out to be a decent effort, I thought for once.
I took a photograph of the Chestnut Way end car park. 
The evening carer arrived and soon had the medicationalisationing sorted out. Took the waste bag with her to the chute for me on her way out.
I took an easy option tonight. Cooked some mushrooms with balsamic vinegar, squid sauce and chillies powder. (Not as ad as it sounds as it turned out, Hehe!) 
Unbelievably, Colin Cramps stopped tormenting me the very moment that the end credits rolled for ‘Heartbeat’. Ah, well!
I think it was gone midnight again before I managed to nod off. Well, that’s not exactly right. I realised I’d not taken the Hemp capsule again! I nodded off many times, but only for a minute, then I’d shoot awake again. 
I woke up with a whopping great jump and jerk. It was of such magnitude it moved my body mass a few inches towards the edge of the second-hand, £300, c1968, overwhelmingly-sickeningly beige coloured, tatty, uncomfortable, wobbly-recliner. A few more inches would have had me on the carpet, cursing and nursing Harold’s Haemorrhoids! Hehehe!
Of course, that was the end of any sleeping, so I lay a few seconds to work out what day and time it was and any actions or activities required… But here was the watch? No longer on my wrist?
I soon found out what I’d done with it – fourteen hours later, I found it on the floor, behind the £300, second-hand bought, c1968, nauseously beige-coloured, not-working, rusty, rickety, difficile, crumb-covered tatty recliner.
Refilling the kettle, Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley kicked off. Talk about bad timing! Harrumph! The water went all over the previously washed and dried cutlery and crockery, down the front cabinet of the sink and down my trousers, socks and slippers, and onto the kitchen floor…
I had to do other jobs and kept nipping back to see if Liberty-Global, the company with a 
Did the health checks, and the internet was back on. But to for long, ten minutes maybe…
Pee’d off with this already! The Iceland delivery arrived. 
incapable of providing a re
Washed and changed into the night attire, and I made up a bottle of spring water and lime juice. I did a couple for Carer Richard, who may come on Monday, and stored them in the fridge, so they will be nice and cold for him.
As I got down on the recliner to watch some TV, I took this snap of my legs. Not a pretty sight!
A morning shot here, Mayhaps Wednesday. (Or, Thursday, or else Friday?) 
Still, the 149 Sys reading came out okayish. DIA 70, Pulse at 91. The body temperature was not such a good result, though! Even lower this time, the minimum being 35°c, it was a little low at 33.7°c.
I’m assuming the picture of the Dettol disinfectant would have had something to do with Little Inchies Fungal Lesion bleeding and my need to wash the trews using it?
Aha! I can remember taking this one! I used Carer Richard’s so kindly donated camera. The batteries ran out, but I had some in stock and changed them, got a decent shot? Something bugs me that I may 
have already put this on a blog? Ah, Thursday this one, when I got the Ocado order delivered, by a helpful bloke who took the bags through to the kitchen, bless his cotton socks. Some great nosh arrived! Marmite cobs, fresh pod peas, potato cheese and leek pies. (Had an Accifauxpa with them, I’ll try to remember to tell you of the farce later). 
A tasty treat of the day, Polish sourdough bread, cheese twists, as well. Oh, and the best cakes I’ve ever had in my life, and I’m gerrin’ on a bit now yer know, Hehehe! Four cream and strawberry jam tartlets… Eat them all? Me? Ahem! Erm… Yes! Got some strawberries as well; going out for 
treats, they will be. Got the stuff stored away.
I think I’ve made a cock-up on this one; I can’t remember eating this at all. So, possibly, Dementia Doreen is having fun with me, or I saved an old photo, not a new one… that is, of course, unless the computer card reader ate the new one?
Ah, this was Thursdays anyway, I reckon, Cause there is sourdough bread in the picture. See that, I worked that out despite Dementia Doreen. Har-har Yes, I had two Heinz veggie burgers Texan style. They were delicious Yellow tomatoes, podded peas and BBQ sauce on the burger sandwiches. 
Fridays morning It took me hours to get the blog done with the graphic of Lisa and Bill in their laboratory. 
Oh, bloody woe is me! That damned Shuddering Shoulder Shirley is having a ball with me this week. Her timing is just immaculate. I was just stirring the freshly made mug of Glengettie when she gave just one almighty jerk that resulted in tea and broken pottery on the kitchen floor once more that needed to be cleared, cleaned and mopped again!
The can of strong Chilli-con-carne and garden peas was slowly warmed through. Then I added some grated leeks and some more red beans, Liquid smoke, then the BBQ sauce, all the time stirring it, on a low light, turning up the heat for the last few minutes. 
I thought the drops of blood on the cotton wool had created a humorous face pattern. I took this snap of it. Hehehe! 
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