Inchcockski – Saturday 29th August 2020: I felt anandrious today, and confused with it!

Saturday 29th August 2020

Sethoso: Moqebelo Oa la 29 Phato 2020

03:30hrs: I came to my limited warped senses, with only one aim, that was to get to the Porcelain Throne, pronto! I extracted my wobbly, overly-bellied body from the £300, second-hand, c1968 rickety recliner, caught my balance, grabbed Metal Mickey. Then I proceeded to do a slow-motion imitation of a John Cleese walk, desperate to hold back any anticipated escapages en route to the wet-room! I thought I’d succeeded!

I whipped down the PPs and got settled down sharpishly on the raised seat, There followed one of the most horrendous evacuations I’ve ever had. Sadly! 

The painful motion began of its own accord, the grindingly slow, pleonastic event went on and on… Argh! After what felt like an hour or so, (but was only a few minutes), the final push I had to make to encourage things along, was agony, but necessary. A few seconds to recover, and I stood up gingerly and found that much blood had flowed, in amongst the pebble-like evacuated product. And paradoxically, during the mass evacuation, I took no less than three wee-wees! But worse of all, some of the pebbles were on the floor around where I stood! So all my best efforts to avoid this happening came to nothing!

A good clean up, medicationing, and antisepticalisationing took place. During which, I caught Metal Mickey with my foot, and he came down straight onto my left foot toes!  I was worried about the noise the calamity had made, hope it didn’t bother anyone!

  Of course, I wasn’t bothered at all. I took it nonchalantly and in my stride. Pain means nothing to me, Ahem! However, the embarrassment flowed thickly!

I hobbled to the kitchenette, and needed another wee-wee! I can’t keep mention this,  but it kept on all morning, every wee was of the SSP (Short-Sharp-Painless) type, and, peculiarly, with no pre or after Micturition dribbling. Not a good start to the day, but my EQ insisted things will improve, that’ll do me if he’s right!

I took a snap of the morning view, then got the kettle on the boil, and retrieved the BP sphygmomanometer from the third-down medical drawer.

The Sys is still a bit high, and the pulse rate was up – this is possibly due to the nightmare evacuation farce on the Throne, and all the upset of the proceedings, methinks?

Made a brew of Glengettie tea, and took the medications. Then off to Computer Cameron, and made up a template. Then updated the Friday Inchcock, which, after the horrendous start to the day, went almost smoothly. Oh, Yes! The ailments were all, apart from Toothache Terence and Shuddering-Shoulder-Shirley, being kind to me! A long job, but I completed it in record time. Smug-Mode-Utilised! 

As I got up to go for yet another SSP wee-wee. Coming back, I spotted the card posted Thursday, had dropped between the chairs. I got the long picker-upperer and retrieved, and opened it. It was from Warden Deana, bless her.

I got the blog sent off to WordPress, Pinterested some photos from it, and made a start on this post.

After an hour or two, and many wee-wees, I went to make another brew, Thompsons Punjabi. I got some new potatoes in the crockpot, to marinate, with sea salt, and some fish vinegar for a while, I’ll put the hear on later.

Took the tea, and returned to Computer Cameron, but not for long, Toothache Terence was starting his searing with pain again, so back to the kitchen for an extra Codeine.

I visited Facebook and read and posted some stuff. Then went on the WordPress Reader section. Time’s flown, I’d better get the ablutions done. Back in a bit…

I’m back! Not as easy a session as yesterday, but that was a miraculously damage-fee special one-off session. Back to a closer to the norm performance today. Hehehe!


etc. And then ! Tsk!

  • On arriving in the wet room, the need for another Porcelain Session came. And a painful one it was! But far easier than the first one all the same.
  • Oh, dearie me! The cistern was not coping with removing the waste product! I had the lid off and kept flushing and refilling via a jug from the sink. I poked in the inlet pipe, and found it part-blocked with the toilet block seals? I gave up after that, I’ll have another go later on. Gragnangles! 
  • Too early to use the shower, too noisy. So I cleaned and medicated my lower regions, but gave up trying to stop Harold’s Haemorrhoids from bleeding, I’ll try after having the stand-up wash. When I can concentrate easier. Flagtoggles!
  • Pickleglobknobs! The teeth cleaning was a nightmare, well, morningmare, bleeding gums, agony from the toothache, and four dropsies of the paste and brush!
  • The one job, shaving, did frit me a tad. Yet it went so well, only twp dropsies of the razors, and one of the foam spray. And, only one tiny cut above ear-hole. It always amazes me, why does my hair grow around and in the earholes, but nowhere else? Just a thought. Confusionableitis!
  • Cleaning around the rear end caused a few stings from the furuncles and piles. Ohh-oh-ho!
  • The dreaded medicationalising, was as to be expected, hurtful! Hahaha!
  • When it came to putting on the fresh PP’s, I lost my balance a smidge, I didn’t go over though. Instead, I put my hand out on the floor cabinet to stop myself toppling. Thus clearing just about everything you can see in this photograph! Grobbleknangles!
  • Note the screws up Haemorrhoidcream tub? When picking things up, I dropped that one three times! On the third effort, it bounced off of the raised seat, on to the wall, and rebounded landing behind the pipework! Grigglebogsblowit! Took me a lot of effort to reach it with the short picker-upperer (Donated to me by Jenny, Bless her ♥), and I had to knock the cartilage damaged finger getting it!
  • Then I had a bash at freeing the waste product. More flushes, and prodding in the hole. It’s still not all gone, but I’d had lost heart and felt atrabilious. I left it, to try yet again later on.

The feet and legs, as with the rest of the body, was really anæmic looking. Ghostly, infirm, peaky! A few new blotches. Silver-Lining-Search-Result: However, the ankle ulcer continues to slowly fade away.

I got some trousers and my slippers on, and off to the kitchen. The morning was breaking, at last.

I got the kettle on for a mug of Thompsons Punjana.

Set the heat on the crockpot, and put some mushrooms in the saucepan, with some sea salt and balsamic vinegar.

Ah, Herbert’s at his model making again, I reckon. No drilling and hammering this time, just the odd tap-knock and clunk. No problem at the moment.

I had a look at the many emails awaiting my attention. Busy looking time coming up for next week.

The wee-weeing is still coming at a steady rate of knots, about eleven or more so far, I reckon.

I had a perusal of the Nottingham Local E-magazine. To find some of the latest Coronavirus figures available. It took a while, but I managed to get these articles found, that does not look too good.

The cunning way in which they have changed the central figure from total to just new cases make it look far less to worry about.

Yesterday’s figure: Four new infections were recorded in Nottingham – bringing its total up to 1,337. Across the wider county, there have now been 3,366 positive tests confirmed since the start of the pandemic. This is an increase of 10 since yesterday, with Broxtowe recording the highest number of new cases (three) in the last 24 hours. However, there were no new cases reported in either Mansfield or Ashfield, while Bassetlaw, Gedling, and Rushcliffe all recorded two new cases.

I had a look at the leeks, mushrooms, and new potatoes cooking progress. Coming along nicely. Then I went on to create a funny ode on WordPress. Well, that was the plan… but the Prescriptions arrived, Deepak himself delivered them, bless his cotton socks. I thanked him and gave him a bag of goodies for the staff.

I turned off the computer and placed the medicinal items in the kitchen, and got on with making the meal. Another goodish effort and I gave it 7/10 for a Flavour-Rating.

Consumed it with relish, and got the pots washed. The fatigue and weariness dawned on me as I sat down, but would Sweet Morpheus arrive? No!

Put the TV on, in the hopes, this might help. But, no! The danged Thought-Storms began! Confusion, aporias, and incongruities flourished! They produced a sort of habrobaniacal state of mind! Claptickleisations!

Inchcock Today: Monday Bank Holiday 29th May 2017 Stuck in, no buses and the Trots return. Humph!


Monday Bank Holiday 29 May 2017

Romanian: Sâmbătă, 29 Mai 2017

0420hrs: Woke with a start, TV still on, undrunk orange juice in the mug near the £300 second-hand recliner, remote control resting in the folds of my stomach. Hehe!

Amazing innit? Last night I fell asleep, had a dream (Albeit an odd one) and found notes about it so clear and lucidly defined, and in pencil handwriting that I must have written, but was nothing like my usual scrawl. Also, I was able to copy it with ease when I updated yesterday’s Diary. Now, this morning knowing I’d had a hell of a dream and conscious of it being a real enjoyable sweven… but cannot remember anything else about it and I did not make any notes of it this time? Humph!

To the porcelain throne – a little loose and disconcerting this morning. Prayed that the ‘Trots’ were not coming back again! Pondered on whether to take a diarrhoea capsule or not.

Into the kitchen. The view outside was so gorgeous again with the pretty fresh greens. I took a photograph at the top of this page. Made a mug of Yorkshire tea, opened the computer and doctored the photo.

Then set about finalising and updating yesterday’s diary and doing a WordPress page on Sunday’s fantastic Papplewick Pumping Station visit and got them both posted off.

5Fri12fPassed the wind and shot ASAP back to the Porcelain Throne! This decided me to imbibe the medications next, and take a diarrhoea capsule with them after all!

Made another brew and took them.

Got this diary started off, accompanied I’m afraid with the familiar rumbling, grumbling bubbling innards having now started. Humph!

1Mon02For some reason, WordPress is not allowing me to Share with Facebook now?

And Grammarly is playing up and not working now and then. I tried the button many times without any luck. I can’t win can I?

Damned technology!

Fancy that? Grumph

The tea had gone cold again. Went to get a drink of milk, and Accifauxpa number one arrived. As I pulled back the inner foil lid on the carton, I managed to spill the milk over the inside of the fridge door, me, and the floor!

Made another mug of tea after cleaning up, then I did some WordPress reading.

Onto Facebook.

1Mon03Jillie from TFZ posted about kitchens.

I took this photographicalisation and posted it. Told them it is Crowded, cramped, not much storage space and minuscule – But I love it! Hehe!

Spent hours catching up with Facebook, enjoyed it, well, all apart from the freezing it did again.

Got the oven warming up ready for the beef pie to go in later. Put a heat under the potatoes on low. I’ve boiled them in BBQ flavouring today. Hope they taste alright.

Realised I’d not turned on the cooker, Tsk!

I did an order for Morrisons for fodder on Tuesday while t1Mon04he oven warmed up. Made some stuffing that should cook at the same time as the pie. Hopefully.

Reread the Emotions chapter to try to digest the meanings within.

Got the meal served in a bowl so as to seek to avoid crumbs from the rather well-done beef pie and crispy sage & onion stuffing. That I’d added some far too thick a gravy mix.

But I ate every scrap of it and the lemon curd yoghourt.

Felt tired again, so washed and settled in the £300 second-hand recliners. Perused the TV magazine. Many programmes worth watching were on at the same time again. I actually managed to watch over two hours of programmes, before the urge to use the Porcelain Throne arrived. After which I declared myself as ‘A Trot Sufferer’ again! Huh!

Most uncomfortable now, innards grinding away and Duodenal Donald joined in later.

The bug got to me, you know, the one where I  am suddenly aware that I have forgotten something, summat needed to be done? Horrible sensation and I could not remember anything, yet the feeling remained that I had forgotten something?

I spent ages nodding off to be woken by Duodenal Daniel or the requirement to visit the Throne, nodding off again, up again… All night it seemed. In fact, I think I did manage to nod off about midnight without any further Throne visitations until I woke around 0425hrs, and hastily, just in time got to the Porcelain!

The Trot’s Return? Oh, flipping ‘eck!

TTFN all, fanks for reading.

Inchcock Today Saturday 29th October 2016: Computerisationing nearly all day long

I came across this Poem while searching for something else this morning. I thought it was so gentle, and unpretentious; I’d like to share it with you all. 


Saturday 29th October 2016

In Norwegian: Lørdag 29 Oktober 2016

Awake, wide awake, at 0400hrs, out of the rickety £300 second-hand recliner chair and to the wetroom porcelain for a painful and bloody WRHD session. Not a good start I thought?

Anne Gyna and Roger Reflux had both decided to give me some stabbing gip this morning. By the time I was out of the WC, a new pain had developed on the top left-hand side of the chest, never had this one before. Worra start eh? After the great health day yesterday too. Tsk!

Medications were taken, along with an extra painkiller and ulcer juice.

Got the washing collated and in the bag to go down to the laundry room. In the washer and back up to do some WordPressing. Half an hour later and down again to move the clobber into the dryer. Roger Reflux and Anne Gyna both going along with me. Back up the lift and on the computer again.

0545hrs, back down and collected the dried washing, cleaned the filter and up a final time and stored the things away.

Took some more anti-ulcer medicine and another pain-killer, only an extra 30g Codeine, don’t want to take any diamorphine, although I’ll see how it goes. Not had pain like this for a long time. Yesterday I woke up feeling free and so happy with the ailments all giving me a break, this morning they seem to be in an irritable Let’s-give-the-old-fart a bad- time mood. Even the toes were painful now? Hehehe! Still, Arthur Itis appears to be losing interest in my knees and ankles a bit. Why he wanted to attack my wrists, I don’t know, but I rubbed in some Phorpain gel that seemed to have done the trick within half an hour.

Many WRWWs again this morning, but that’s nothing new.

0700hrs: Cleaned the micro-fibre cloth and scolded the back on my hand: I was not surprised in the least. Collected the empty glass jars, pickled egg, ulcer medicine bottle and a pickled mushroom container. I thought it would be a good idea to have nip down and out of the lobby and a hobble down to the recycling bins with them, and try to take a photograph in the dark outside.

Got down into the reception area and decided it would be best if I go back up to the flat and collect the camera! So I did. What a Wally I am!

Up to number 72, got the camera and down again and out down to the end of Chestnut Walk to the recycling bins.



6sat06All done by 0730hrs. I enjoyed the little amble, nobody else about at all. Plenty of lights on at many flat windows mind.

Not windy or too cold either.

It had been raining earlier; I worked this out by seeing rain on the roads and bins you know. Hehehe

The toes were aching a bit, but Arthur Itis was still sociable with my knees and ankles bless him.

I can’t understand how the chest pains seemed to evanesce then return when I got back to the apartment? Any suggestions please doctors? Haha!

Started to update this diary and do some pathetic graphics, pathetic; due to my not being able to import certain formats of pictures. Tsk!

n-janetSeven and a half hours later, I’d managed to do eleven graphics for the TFZers site.

This photograph is of the first one done on the right.

There were so much more that I wanted to do, but the hassle of CorelDRAW not working properly was driving me mad.Even after

Even after I’d reloaded an old version in the foolish hopes that this might work. Lost a lot of time there too.

6sat08Opened Facebook and posted each one to the TFZers gallery. Then did some regular Facebooking.

Getting many messages I must ask Duncan about when he visits. They all confuse me a bit, especially the orange exclamation marks?

Must get the ablutions done soon.

6sat07Sorted the medication pots out for the week. Took tonight’s dose.

Got the dumplings in the oven.

Then got on with the ablutions, a good shave with only two cuts, Colgate Gelled the teggies that bled a bit, a great scrub under the shower Hehe!

And into the jammies and got the meal finished off! Well, that was the plan, but I’d forgotten to turn on the oven earlier. So I turned it on now and potted around as it warmed sufficiently, then put the cheesy buttered mashed potatoes and dumplings back in the oven. Tsk!

6sat09Finally, it was ready.

Crock-pot vegetables, cheesy mashed potatoes, tomatoes and the meat filled dumplings.

A bit of BBQ sauce (Overdid that, lost control of my squirt, Haha!) and a Cox’s apple and vanilla imitation cream dessert to follow.

The dumplings looked pale and insipid; that’s why I suppose they tasted tasteless? Shame. I ate it all, though, just hope the dumplings don’t aggravate the ulcer or reflux valve. Not complaining now, though, apart from the old Duo Denal ulcer the ailments were all calming down now.

Not the foggiest what meat was inside of them? But it didn’t taste bad, it’s just that it didn’t taste of anything much? As opposed to the cheese filled ones at least.

Looking forward to seeing Duncan tomorrow.

Washed up the things, and on settling to watch some gogglebox programmes, the nodding off started.


Inchcock Today Fri 5 Feb 16: Cramp and Arthur Itis bad in the legs all day. Humph!


Friday 5th February 2016

Woke with a jump around 0400hrs, sure it was the dream I’d been having. Wrote down some notes before I nodded off again.

Awoke with a mission to visit the porcelain at 0600hrs, got up get to the bathroom with the knees not at all keen on my doing so. But a good start to the day here: No blood from the rear or Little Inchy and the constipation was a great deal easier! Mind you, I was doing so much sneezing it started the reflux valve off, and breathing was not without a certain amount of pain. Hey-ho, you can’t have everything eh? Hehe!

 Made a cuppa, took the medications and got the laptop on, consulted the notes on the dream. Even after such a short while, many of the words meant nothing to me, but at least, I could remember certain bits of it without the notes?:

I was inside a tram or railway carriage, running up and down the length of it, and recognised many passengers from my past. Then, I was loading an old stage coach with everything imaginable. Those items I can recall were a fish aquarium, my old Hoover from 1984, boxes and boxes of books, umbrellas, walking frames, my old fishing tackle, even my old brown Reliant Robin, that for some reason had become collapsable? In amongst the things were people, and I was trying to feed them at the same time as loading up the carriage?

The surroundings changed, I was on top of the stagecoach (The driver of the stagecoach was a guard who I had worked with many years ago). As it trundled along on the cobbled roads, and I kept spotting people at the side of the road and demanding that we stop to pick them up. Vagrants, policemen, Jeremy Thorpe amongst the many we collected I think. The others inside eventually turned on me, telling me that these new folk would have to share their Sugar Puffs, and there were not sufficient to go round?

I started this diary off, then completed yesterday’s and got it posted. Not that anything interesting was in it like.

I came across this word ‘Ingeniculation’ today. It will come in handy for me to use and try to impress others with. It means ‘Bending of the knee.’ Feel free to use it like. Hehe!

I got myself in the bath (Not easy, and a painful exercise, especially getting out again Hehe).

Had a gossip with some residents as I waited for the bus to arrive. One of the girls told me to try a shop called Lakeland to get some little individual pots of preserves from.

DSC00134 Got into town and went to the Jessops camera shop to see it they had any multi-card readers.

They had, but it cost me £24 plus VAT making it £30 all but a penny.

So, I went to the bank and got some cash. Tsk!

Then had a hobbled to the Lakeland shop to investigate for some Blackcurrant preserve jars. They did have some in, they were packs of three 40g jars; £3 each! Blimey the jars are only sufficient to make one sandwich! I didn’t invest in any.

The cramps along with the arthritis were making me suffer today. Oh Yes!

DSC00136I limped to the Primark store and found they had some of the jammie bottoms in at £5 each on a clearance counter. So I bought the last two XL pairs on the shelves. Well, it said £5 on the ticket, later when I got back to the flat, I found they had charged me £6 for them. Also, £2 for a Fair Isle Fleece, whatever one of them are? The jumpers I’d bought they charged me DSC00138the proper price? Suppose I’ll have to go back again, Huh!

I had a dodder around the slab square.

Seeing the buildings that were designed by the brilliant Watson Fothergill in this photograph, made me appreciation the man’s skill more than ever.

I wasn’t too cold today, but the biting wind made feel like it was.

DSC00137There were dozens of foreign food stall in the slab square today, along with some craft stalls.

At one on the corner, they were charging £5.99 for a French beefburger? That’s about $8.68 in American dollars, for one beefburger?

Perhaps they were made with horsemeat?

That’s about $8.68 in American dollars, for one beefburger?

In another, they were selling Kangaroo burgers at £4.99.

I could the 40 bus back to the flats, to save me having to wait for half an hour in the wind for the L9 bus that would have taken me all the way to the flats.

When I dropped off on Winchester Street Hill, the bus departed and I checked both ways and waited on the bend in the road, until no traffic was in sight – a car coming UP the hill nearly had me as I grappled to cross the road quickly enough, thanks to the pain from my arthritis and cramps. I’ve never had such persistent pains during the day ever. It might be the heavier water retention in the legs today that caused this? I’ll ask the nurse when I go for my INR blood test in the morning. No! I mean on Monday.

I doddered along to the flat. Got in and took an extra painkiller before doing anything, and then had to peep at the porcelain.

I put the clobber I’d bought in the self-erected steel and canvas storage thingy – it wobbled a bit. That made two of us. Hehehe!

Laptop on and updated this twollop.

01W01aDecided on baked potatoes and a beef pie for dinner. If I remember, I add some sweet potato balls when there are twenty minutes left to go. Garden peas in the pan and for afters, I have one strawberry mini-cheesecake left.

Please heed, that I did not, I say not, buy any fresh cream french horns again today!

I feel almost proud of myself. Haha!

Did some Facebooking.

DSC00140Not a bad meal. Apart from the sweet potato balls, they tasted a bit off – so I dished them.

Rated the remainder at 9.1/10.

Completely wiped out now.

The cramps on the swollen water retaining legs were still as bad as it was when I got up this morning.

Tried to watch some goggle-box but kept falling asleep and whenever I moved the legs the pain sprang me back into the world of awakeness! Humph!

Sat 8 Aug 2015: Whoopsiedangleplops, Dilapidated body, Confused Brain…

Saturday 8th August 2015


0415hrs: Stirred to like (Of sorts) The fridge freezer seems to have settled for a morning chorus of ‘Clunk, Whir… bang shudder whine chatagrurgle, Hoooiii clunk shudder this morning.

Bit of a dream still lingered:

In an old dilapidated building with dust and sunshine coming through the broken windows… chasing someone through the corridors that turned into passageways on a boat?  Someone then chasing me… that’s all I can recall?

WC’d, only a bit of bleeding from ‘Little Inchy’. Still felt well tired but in good spirits this morning.

0707Laptop on to finish and post yesterdays diary – made a cuppa and took me medications.

When I got up to make another cuppa when the first went cold, I glanced out of the window to see a bloke who was walking his three little dogs on the green opposite the flats, and all three were taking a dump at the same time! Original photograph time I thought… but by the time I’d got me card out of the laptop and put it in the camera they had all finished their ablutions. Hehehe!

Incidentally, me fingers are a lot less bothered with Arthur Itis this morning?

I wondered if the Magnesium tablet I took last night wiv me evening medications might have helped? The cramps that I took them for in the first place started to come on a bit last night, but nowhere near as bad as they have been, surely one tablet can’t have been that effective? I’m puzzled.

I put the batteries for the camera on charge, charged the mobile phone, then got yet another ‘Wrong Call’ on the land-line. It sounded like the regular chappy who calls every night and  can’t understand what he’s saying but he persists – I might have to get rid of the land-line if this continues. He’s calling ever night between 1700 to 19oohrs and now starting it at 0600hrs? Foreign accent, muffled voice, just can’t make out what he’s saying?

I put the Betamethasone Corticosteroid cream in the bathroom in case needed again.

Facebooked and graphicalisationed for a few hours.

Got the overfull washing bag, capsules and freshener ready, camera in bag and went down to see if I could have any luck with getting a washing machine free to use – I couldn’t. Both in use, and one indicating 35 minutes left the other 33 min’s – seems someone has used two machines – greedy little monkeys.

Back up to the flat and updated this diary while waiting to go down again and hope someone else doesn’t beat me to it again, and get me laundry done. If I can I’ll take me camera with me so when the drier is on I can have a poddle up to the park, find a bench and sit hoping to catch a photo of some wild life in the woods.

Made a cuppa and did a bit on Coreldraw x7.

Popped down to the laundry room and a machine was free.

while the wash was a-washing I did me crossword book a bit, and managed to a few answers done from te previously started one – not a lot, but some.

Got the drier going, but had to use the one that was very low to the ground.

Whoever had used it before did not clean the filter out.

DSCF0225This gets to me somewhat yer know, I’ve never yet… no I did once, but only once find the drier had been had its filter cleaned by someone after using it’.

Blimey, they even supply us with toothbrushes and knives to do the job – and still the moronic idle scum-bags don’t do it! Still it don’t bother me in the slightest bit really. FibMode

Off on a walk up the hill into Woodthorpe Park, too many humans playing music, kids screaming, footballers etc for any chance of a decent photo of any 0705wildlife. Huh!

As I was crossing the grass, I came across a bumble bee (I think it was) that was crawling through the grass, seemingly pressing its body against the blades?

I wondered what it was up to, even when I bent down close to take the photographs he wasn’t put off his path or intentions?

I went up and around the Mansion at the top of the hill and back down the other side.

I veered left into the woods and through a 0706thicket (If that’s the right word?) of trees and was so impressed I wandered further in and around it then took a photo of it as I was about to come out of it.

As I thought how much I loved all those different shades of green, and the trees fighting each other for the sunlight, it dawned on me – I was lost! “Whoopsiedangleplop Mark 1 for the day”

I could see the tops of the flats and eventually found a way through back to them.

I hope no one saw me laughing at missen as I appeared out of the wood into the grassed area.

0707I took a photo of the flats as I emerged into the open – from the other side to those I have taken before.

Woodthorpe Court on the right, Winchester Court on the left.

The right one is where I now dwell, but on the other side of the building.

Then:  “Whoopsiedangleplop Mark 2 for the day”, as I was steadying myself to take a good stable photo, I stepped forward a couple of paces to try and balance the shot – and trod in some dog-phoo!

Back into the bushes to clean me shoe up, then back to the flat and me laundry drying.

As I was taking out the washing “Whoopsiedangleplop Mark 3 for the day”!

Me back went when I was bending down getting the togs out – didn’t half feel a fool having two women help me up again. Double Tsk!

Back up to the flat, put me togs away and got the carrier bags ready for clearing out the cupboards tomorrow ready for the demolition men who are going to tear out me cupboards and drawers to fill in the hole in the wall – well that’s the plan anyway – but we’ll see when they get here eh?

Updated this diary and put the photo’s wot I took on it.

Pondered on what nosh to have. Bacon sarnies methinks?

DSCF0231Did some graphicalisationing again on Corel Draw and Paint x7.

Herbed chopped tomatoes and crispy bacon with bread thins fer me nosh. Rated 8.6/10

Had a great bath, soak and shave. It took me more time than having these did to medicate missen afterwards! Hehe! Put Phorpain gel on me legs hands and back.

Cuppa and took me evening medications.

Tired again now, and me back is still painful. Huh!

Thu 6 Aug : Inchcock Today: Busy yet again – Tsk!

Thursday 6th August 2015

0435hrs: The tones of the fridge-freezer stirred me, it had added a few more clunk-thuds to its chorus this morning – bit worrying that.

Up and at em… well, I stirred and appreciated the lack of cramps again last night, then mused on the dreams I could recall:

I was struggling to get up a beach from a canoe… it looked like I was an Australian beach – Kangaroos and koala bears all around…

Climbed over some sand dunes and found it was Los Angeles, I have no idea how I knew it was Los Angeles but I did. I caught a cab and the driver was a robot with a shiny metal head and spoke in an Eastern European voice to tell me I should not be here since the Declaration of Independence was declared, only non-humans were permitted in the City?

Can’t recall what happened next, but I ended up in the middle of a gigantic plate of chips struggling to get out, with Marissa Bergen trying to pull me out using guitar strings with hooks on the ends?

Shame I can’t recall owt else though.

Kettle on, cuppa and me medications taken then a check on me failing body parts when I had a wash and shave: Arthritis not bad in the least, Anne Gyna bothersome a bit, ulcer very fair, hardly any bother, Reflux valve closing okay at the moment, even the sin cancer wound has stopped itching – all good really, even the Little Inch had not been bleeding last night. (Should I have said that I’m thinking?).

The food delivery man rang, Asda (Walmart to me American friends) had failed to change the directions to the one’s I changed on their site. He arrived a few minutes later and I now have an overfull freezer.

Whoopsiedangleplop number one – knocked the new clock over, and I now do not own a new clock that works. Huh!

Little Inch was sore as soon as I moved the blood flowed again. Took me a while to get it to stop.

Laptop on, WC’d a few times, made a cuppa and finished off yesterdays diary.

There is only 1½ hours to go to the time the Nottingham City Homes repair man comes to replace the condemned fan heater, so no time to get any laundry done. Tsk!

Steve from Age UK rang (Yes he did, honestly – amazing!) he’ll meet me tomorrow at the old house t 1400hrs.

Got paperwork ready in bag now to take with me to meet him.

Filled in the electoral register letter I’d received and went to post it off.

Took the mail for Margaret the previous tenant, to the Community shed, and to ask anyone there if they still want the walker and tell them not to worry about making the phone calls fer me as I’d got hold of Steve from Age UK and would be meeting him on Friday.

The door was open – Yahoo!

Julia asked me if she could have the walker before I could mention it – I pointed out that it had been in me shed downstairs awaiting use for two weeks now! (That’s telling her…  she don’t scare me!) FibMode

Deana appeared and I gave them a choice of nibbles.

I realised I’d not crossed off Margaret’s name from the form I was about to post and Julia stuck some Cellotape on the envelope for me after I’d corrected me error.

When I informed them not to bother doing the telephone calls for me to the BT and Gas company to cancel their services for the old place, it became apparent they had forgot all about me request, judging my the confused and bemused expressions on their faces. Hey-ho!

Poddled to the letter box and then back to the shed, at the flat and got the Walker and took it back to the shed so they could donate it to the needy person. No thank you’s, just a ‘Yo wer quick!’ when I got back to the shed with it.

Mind you there might have been thinking about it, I didn’t have me hearing-aids in.

Rushed back to the flat in case the maintenance personage who had been booked to replace the condemned wall heat arrived… silly me thinking they’d come early.

Must remember tomorrow – meet brother-in-law Pete at 1030hrs at his bus stop in town then make sure I go to the old house for 1400hrs to meet Steve.

Made a cuppa and tidied around a bit – no point in doing a good job, the fitter will no doubt cause a decent mess – and next week I’ve got the carpenter tearing out the cupboard and drawer to block up the hole in the wall – then the week after it’ll be mayhem from their replacing the condemned window – oh the thought of it all… Tsk!

0704Doing this diary while I await the arrival of the Nottingham City Homes electrician.

Re-posted me graphic wot I dun on Facebook.

Titivated the open cupboard.

Nearly fell asleep once.

The Electrician chap from Nottingham Homes rang the buzzer and came up to replace the heater on the wall.

DSCF0212He didn’t speak much, took all his time to answer me questions and comments.

Took him around ten minutes max to change it.

He’s left me a nice spot on the wall to paint over bless him.

I can’t see any controls on the heater? DSCF0210I’ll have to ask someone later maybe they are handily placed on the top of the heater where I cannot reach them?

I got the brush and dustpan and swept up the bits of wire, plastic and the screws he’d left on the floor as a donation no doubt. Hehe!

Dinner in’t oven.

DSCF0213Chips (Fries), baked beans, tomatoes and pickled bullets… no, beetroots, smoked cooked pork with some bread thins.

I consumed this with great relish – the chips were savoury French Fries from Asda (Walmart) and pretty good they were too.

Rated this nosh at 8.4/10.

Sorted paperwork needed for tomorrow afternoon when I meet Steve at the old dump, so he can phone and cancel BT phone/internet and British Gas to cancel them.

Odd that innit, British Gas, owned by a French company? And BT biggest shareholder is Renaissance Technologies LLC a multinational company based in New York USA.


Took a photo from the living room window of the evenings skyline.

Tired and weary I got me head down – but not before coating me legs in Phorpain Gel first to counter the’Cramps’ when they came. Took me evening medications.

Feeling just tad less unsettled tonight, knowing that at least some progress in sorting the old place might get done tomorrow.

DSCF0088I dreamt early about Duncan Robertson (Cyber-pal), thought he was here and we were having a cuppa on the balcony and we started singing and a police helicopter hovered above us with one officer on a megaphone, but I can’t recall what he was telling us.

When I woke up for a porcelain visit after about two hours head-down, I actually looked around for Dunc – wish I could remember more.


Wed 5th June 2015: Inchcock Today: Morrison’s delivery, Dentist 0930hrs too early for a bus so walk there, Iceland 1300hrs, Clinic 1430hrs, Try ringing Age UK Steve (Ha!), Rubbish down chute, take extra Omeprazole, Clean up behind kitchen door, Little Inch bleeding, No magnesium to be had after long search, Dentist changes appointment, Nuisance phone-caller, Internet on a go-slow… Tsk!

Wednesday 5th June 2015


Up at 0355hrs, mind racing again: Morrison’s delivery, Dentist 0930hrs too early for a bus so walk there, Iceland 1300hrs, Clinic 1430hrs, Try ringing Age UK Steve (Ha!), Laundry, Rubbish down chute, take extra Omeprazole, Clean up behind kitchen door, Nuisance phone-caller, Prescriptions to collect, Cramps and on and on…

I realised that the ‘Cramps’ had not bothered me much at all last night, not sure if that was due to the dollop of Phorpain I’d rubbed into me legs or not. Must get some magnesium tablets while out this morning. (Soon found out that none of the three chemists I called in sold them – HUH!)

Made cuppa, laptop on and took me medications.

WC’d finding ‘Little Inchy’ had been bleeding again, yet another pair of jammy bottoms for the wash!

Legs showing signs of water retention – surprised me that as I am visiting the porcelain far more often this last few days?

IMG_0041Wash and brush-up, during which the perfectionist painter Paul’s handiwork I admired.

Wondered how to get off the paint without scratching the door?

A handy-man I ain’t, but he got paid for this crap painting!

The horrible high winds of yesterday and last night were in my favour for once – they were coming from the East and the flats on the other side to where I am coped for the worst. They seem to have dropped a lot this morning.

Did the header for today’s Diary. Posted yesterdays diary and started this one proper.

Got me things ready and set-off on me walk to the Chemists to get some Magnesium tablets, and the dentist fer me appointment.

Called in at the Community Hut on the way – but no one in again.

DSCF0205Walked up into Woodthorpe Park and down the path under the Chestnut trees to Mansfield Road.

Burke-on-a-bike nearly had me coming from behind. Git!

Turned left and over the crest of the hill and into the chemists. Where I asked them if the sold Magnesium tablets to relieve cramps – the lady said no, they are not allowed to stock cramp medications any longer. Oh?

Walked down and into the dentists, where I joined an orderly queue of other mugs all waiting to be snapped at, insulted, sneered at and overcharged.

The Obergruppenfurher Receptionist informed me there was no appointment for me today – it was for next Tuesday 11th at 1415hrs.

0707bI was admonished in Concentration camp Commander style for not realising the appointment had been changed, and reminded of the £18.80 extra charge if I fail to turn up for the next appointment???  

Well I’ll be blowed!

Tail between me legs I departed.

Walked down to the Boots store and waited patiently for someone to tend to me – for a good while. Eventually a lady did come to me at the counter. I asked about Magnesium tablets for me Cramps and she went to talk to someone, then returned. They used to sell Crampex tablets, but they have had to stop stocking them. Oh dear! I should try the larger Boots in town or an independent chemist.

So off to the bus-stop with me free pensioners bus-pass and caught one into town – having first worked out if I had the time so as to get back to the flat fer me food delivery on time.

Dropped off in town and went into the big Boots store in Victoria shopping centre (Mall).

Same story from them, they do not stock them any-more – the chap said that Crampex was a specialist product and no one else makes anything like them to offer me as a substitute. That’s nice innit – all the Cramp-sufferers now have to suffer in agony then?

DSCF0206Not a good day up to now!

Another Nottingham Pavement cyclist nearly had me as I left the building to go and get a bus back to the flats. Huh!

Caught the bus back to the flats.

DSCF0207The route takes in many steep hills to and from the flats on the L9 bus.

Had a go on me crossword book to help stop me from nodding off again en-route like.

Called at the Community hut again on the way to the flat – no one in again.

Thought for a moment when I passed the laundry room and there was a washer free, I’d get me washing done… then remembered I’d got me food coming so changed me mind.

Got in WC’d, then took me bag of rubbish to the chute.

Laptop on and updated this diary. Not an easy job as the Virgin internet connection was so slow… I’d getting fed-up with today…

I tried rebooting laptop to see if it helped speed up the connection…

It didn’t.

Nipped to the Community Shed – still nobody about.

DSCF0209Made me nosh

Cheesey potatoes, 2 mini pork & pickle pies, bread thins and the last few of me seasoned curly potatoes and roast potatoes.

Followed by a small cake and iced lolly.

Rated it 8.4/10.

I got a telephone call on the landline and it was the same foreign chap who has phoned me for the last two nights – can’t really understand what he’s saying. I think he was asking me about an order for some food, but I might be wrong. I decided to turn off the ringer as it seems he is intent on hassling me for some reason. This in turn made the health-alarm box make a buzzing noise and the red light flashed – thought I had to press the flashing light button and got the emergency monitoring lady on asking if I was alright? Int life confusing?

Had a bath and shave, put some Phorpain gel on me legs and knees.

Updated this diary – remembered me medications a little late, but still.

Again fell asleep in the chair – woke-up wobbling with a dizzy, then got me head down.

Thur 9/4/15: Inchcock Today – A Day of Rest…

Thursday 9th April 2015

I woke at 0625hrs – feeling freer than for ages – the good news about Sister Jane ringing about in my head and a sense of happiness in me heart.

I took me Blood pressure on me new machine – yesterday was Syst: 139 Dia: 67 Pulse: 78 – This morning Syst 156 Dia Pulse 83.

Perhaps a little high due to me being excited with the knowledge that Jane was okay and today should be an easier one for me – no medical appointments (until tomorrow) and a determination to get some blogging done now I can concentrate better. 

I rang Pete on me mobile and he sounded a different bloke – I’m so glad for em.

As I made a cuppa to take with me medications and some memories of the dreams I’d had lingered:

I was confined in some underground caves with two other peoples, no idea who they were but I liked them – searching (again) for something, maybe a treasure chest I think? Passages were narrow and we struggled to get through into an open area, a massive cave it held the chest and we were drinking in celebration when one of the women pointed out that we could not get the chest back through the opening we got in through – We decided we needed a lifeboat? I found myself in a supermarket asking if they had any lifeboats for sale and the staff all attacked me with giant frozen salamis and giant chicken legs?

That’s all I can recall?

WC’d, and had to tend to me haemorrhoids, so did me other medicationalising at4IT1 growths, cetraben to me tender areas and Neomycin Sulphate spray in me ear-holes and taking an extra omeprozole cause me duodenal ulcer was starting to play-up.

The little tiny boil on me bum was painful still.

Despite these problems I was still cheerful with the news of our Jane and Pete.

Despite Coreldraw9 freezing occasionally – usually at the wrong time and having to reboot and losing me graphics wot I was working on – 4IT6Tsk! – I managed to get some graphics done for the TFZ gang.

Spent a good few hours on graphicalisationing.

The haemorrhoids are bleeding and painful again… hey-ho.

Pleased with how the last graphic of Andy in the tunnel at the Nottingham Arboretum turned out.

aaaa3aI love doing these. When the graphic packages or laptop does not play up mind. I find I get a kick out of using photographs I’d taken on me walks to use as backgrounds.

I suppose I’d better get a bit of a walk in today – even if it’s the only day I do not have something on to do.

Got myself cleansed and made myself attractive just in case any of the many women that crave for me should meet me as I go on me little hobble to the shop to get some tomatoes. FibMode

I took bags out to the bins and pulled them out for collection in the morning.

IMG_0047Fatima and Fred came down for their brekkers in the morning sunshine.

I went back in and got me coat on etc and set-out for me mini-poddle to the shops on Mansfield Road.

The twtichel was clear of yobs so I took that root.

The sky was so clear and a sparcity of people cheered me up somewhat.

IMG_0048I noticed the sign on the Gladstone pub had been repaired now.

I wondered down and called in the chemists and got some toothpaste and ear spray. Had a little natter with the assistants – made them laugh a bit so that made me feel good too.

Then on and into the launderette where Mandy was on duty.

The place was not very busy, I must remember this in case I have to go later in mid-week like.

0404I managed to have another natter – and I even got Mandy to pose for a photograph for me.

I told her to expect to see this photograph in Bella, Grazia or the Minx magazine shortly. She smiled and called me an idiot.

Out and down to Lidl – I usually regret going there for some reason or other each time I visit.

I plodded around with no particular aim other than to get some tomatoes – but those on show were a mangy lot and all Spanish so I didn’t get any.

I got some Cheese Curls (they were not nice) some canned mushrooms and some apples.

IMG_0049The apples turned out to be dry, tastless and bland – nothing new ther then – I really should stop buying fruit from Lidl.

I noticed some posters they had hanging from the ceiling above the fresh (Using the term Fresh in the loosest possible definition) produce display stating: ‘We Love British!”

This from a German owned company with Ukrainian assistants an Asian security guard  and the poster had been printed in Italy on it.

I wonder if a British retail company had displayed this they would have been accused of being racist?

Better not let Nigel know?

Got back to the hoppit – must remember to sort out a lighter coat for me QMC hospital visit tomorrow with Pete.


IMG_0051Made me nosh of Braised beef in onion gravy, peas and carrots, seasoned little potatoes bit of bread and me medications.

By gum it wer lovely!

Started this diary after a little old man’s nap.


Did some Facebooking.

Drifted off waking up in a painful warped position with the laptop rather heated and me boil stinging.

Inchcock Today: Housebound

Saturday 4th April 2015

I took me medications and nodded-off around 0430hrs.

Woke up around 1045hrs and wrote down notes of the morning dreams I’d had:

Moored boats, all types hundreds of them tightly laying side by side – I was searching through them and everyone I boarded started to sink and I had to jump on another one – couldn’t do any searching they sank that fast… last one was a fishing vessel and it didn’t sink, I was overjoyed because somehow I knew who I was looking for was bound to be hidden on this boat – Found someone hidden in a big cupboard in the galley as I pulled him out the explosion threw us both out into the water… as I tried to get out a Frenchman (Onions around his neck too) stopped me back into the water…?

IMG_0038Went down and made a cuppa tea and took a photo of the dank morning (Well almost midday by now) sky.

Returned to the bathroom in answer to call for attention from the porcelain – fair bit of blood and pain – medicated as best I could.

Not feeling too well this morning.

0602Arthur Itis demanded that his knees get some attention, so I put some extra Phorpain gel and rubbed it in well, took an extra painkiller too.

Despite getting in a late 6 hours of dream filled kip, I still feel so tired?

Must remember all this for when I go to the quacks on Tuesday.

Still, Anne Gyna was not bothering me at all at this stage, plus, no dizzies yet today – swings and roundabouts eh?

Started the laptop and began this post to here.

Not concentrating very well here I’m afraid.

Spent all day on the internet Facebooking, Coreldraw9 and Serif-draw… both graphic packages freezing with alarming ease! Tsk!

Not physically too bad today – mentally challenging due to feeling a bit low – no walkies today, couldn’t muster enough energy or encouragement.

Watched many episodes of ‘All Creatures Great and Small.

Remembered me medications and continued to release involuntary emissions of wind of medal deserving putridity all day and night. Phrewww!

Inchcock Today: Sun 4th/Mon 5th January 2015


-3c at 0315hrs

Sunday 4th January 2015

What an odd dream, and I could remember some of it in detail this time:

I was stood in a massive luxurious gold plated bath with a sink inside it and a tool-box full of me medications and tools…

I could see myself putting the Haemorrhoid cream on my knees instead of  backside, the Painphor cream in my backside instead of me arthritic knees and calling to myself to stop… but I couldn’t hear myself warning me and then started eating the toothpaste, tube and all?

Something about my being young again and cuddled sat on the knees of a large lady…

Suddenly I was in the town centre walking across the slab-square juggling me pots of  medications and singing something while being dive bombed by Warfarin tablets dropped by mini Stuka aircraft?.

All through this particular dream I was watching rather than being and doing. if you know what I mean?

Ah-well. It was different to me usual dreams… I think?

0702medsArose 0315hrs and WC’d dropping me long distance glasses into the porcelain and cursing a bit as I retrieved and cleansed them. Tut – good start that  thought)

Then I went down to make a cuppa and took me medications.

Spent the rest of the day just doing blogging Facebook etc.

Monday 5th January 2015

0050hrs: Up and feeling so low for some reason.


The dream seemed to me like it had lasted so long. Full of frustrations from the past: I was working in a vast factory in security and was frustrated that I could not get every thing done in time… gatehouse duties, lorries in and out, checking loads, chasing around many units warehouses etc. All the buildings were made of planks of wood?

I felt depressed and frustrated for some reason this morning.

Went down to make a cuppa and boy did it feel cold downstairs! Found the heater in the front room had packed up – struggled to swap it with the one in the kitchen and that worked okay.

Brought me tea up and started the laptop – still a feeling of apprehension hung over me.


I  started doing this dairy when the stomach started churning again and the ulcer gave me bother for the first time in ages. The knees and feet still bad.

Want to get the laundry done today. (Or do I?)


Made a cuppa and took me medications and Facebooked for a while.

0101This morning I found the laptop was allowing me to watch videos, only on YouTube mind, so I watched an old Law & Order UK episode.

I then got myself spit and polished and got the laundry things ready – two biggish bags-full again, and set off to the launderette.

Mandy was on duty and we managed a natter or two as I used one of the big machines that took all load of washing in one go – mistake that!

When it had stopped spinning and I went to take the togs out to put in the drier I found they were really wet. I mentioned this to Mandy and she said “Yes, the big machine spins at a slower speed that’s why.

I wish she’s told me that when I was putting the stuff on, ’cause it took £3.40 to get them dried. So by using the big machine instead of two smaller ones I’d saved 40p, but spent an extra £1.40 and an extra twenty minutes was needed to get em dry! Tsk!

Me chin needed shaving again by the time I got back to the flea-pit. (Joking there)

0102I put the togs away and set off for a walk into town, not a comfortable one but easier than the last walk anyway.

En-route I came across yet another piece of Nottingham Street-Art.

I walked through the Victoria centre so I could take a photo of the traffic from the high walkover. On the way through I was sorry to see they had blocked off one side of the walkway because someone was in difficulties of sort sort on the floor near an entrance to the shops and being tended by several folk while waiting for a paramedic.


Nice mix of the old and new buildings?

On the walk-through I took me photo, not many folk about now Christmas and New Year have been and gone.

The muggers, pickpockets, Big Issue sellers and shoplifters must be having a break now.

I went into the Pound Shop and got some microwaveable Sausage Butties then back into Victoria centre and had a walk around the Market. Very sad, so many stalls unoccupied. The same in Derby as well.

Then I popped into the cheapo sweet shop and got some chocolate bars, then into Tesco.

Got some bread and lemon yoghurt… and do you know, I found a pack of French Cream Horns had found it’s way into me basket. Amazing that was!

0104aThe old knees and feet were stinging a bit now.

So I slowly made be way to the bus-stop. Passing ‘House of Fraser’ store window and this is what  saw and could not resist photographing.

I mean, the jeans on the right have got tears and holes in them and appear to have shrunk!

And those on the left look like they’ve not been ironed at all! And what’s the mouse looking thing near the crutch all about?

Fashion? Tsk!

0105As I exited the centre I spotted a driving-school car parked on the double-yellow lines. A Nissan Cube it were, and I thought could Mike Steeden be doing a second job here in Nottingham, cause I know he drives one yer know?

F1 driving school it were, I’ll ‘ave to look into this. Or not of course.

0106I poddled through Trinity Square and sneaked the pigeons some seed. I must stop doing this yer know – one day I’m going to get an instant £60 on-the-spot fine for it I’m sure.

I like the speeding three pigeons flying in at a belting pace from the right.

Down to the bus-stop and caught one straight away.

Some poor devil on the bus had a loud grating chesty cough that constantly burst out and annoyed some of the passengers? They were looking at her and tutting between each other.

Can you believe that? Poor woman, I gave her a smile as I got off the bus and said as loud as I could “Sorry your suffering with that horrible cough Madam, I do hope it eases for you, take care”. I hoped that might shame the moaners, but expect it had no effect at all on them.

0107Hobbled back to the dump and put me bit of food away.


Started the laptop and made a cup of good strong tea.

Then rubbed some Phorpain gel into me knees.

Set about updating this diary and AVG gave me various messages and needed a computer restart.

So I restarted it.

For me nosh I had sweet curried baked beans with sapocka loin and fresh bread, follows by two iced lollies, a yoghurt a lion bar and a pot of mousse. I can always tell when I’m getting down because my foos intake increases. Oh, and the two Fresh Cream French Horns that mysteriously appeared in me basket in Tesco – then took with me medications. Tsk!