Saturday 8th June 2019
Hebrew: 2019 יום שישי 7 ביוני
After making such a mental-mess and getting all confused with things last night, I eventually got some sleep in, a good six hours of peaceful and dreamless peace! Ahh!
05:20hrs. I woke with the most considerable reluctance and taciturnity, then I had to struggle through a short period of uncommunicativeness between my thoughts and brain, that was out of my control. I listened to the confusion reining about, without the slightest idea or decipherment of what was milling about for a few minutes. Then again, somehow, and for some reason, this did not bother me in the least. It was not distressing, disturbing, or even frustrating to me? The fact that this unique event had happened did concern me a little later on in the day, however.
The usual need for a wee-wee came later than usual. But it was enough to convince me to get my well-torsoed body out of the £300 second-hand, gungy-beige, rickety, on its last legs, c1968 recliner, and off to the wet room. There were no toe-stubbing or dropping the walking stick on the toe this time. It was another of the SSWW (Short-Sharp-Wee-wee) variety.
I hand-washed the socks and left them soaking in the sink in liquid soapflakes.
Off to the kitchen, where I noticed the weather was raining and misty.
Luckily for me, I remembered last nights Accifauxpa, when I took the morning medications instead of the evening ones, when I suffered the mental-whoopsiedangleplop and mix-up over time and what day it was. At least I knew where I was. Tsk!
I got the kettle on and fetched the socked and rinsed them, and added them to the nowhere near dry oven mitts on the flat clothes airer.
I challenged me aboulia over what, if, which of the morning tablets I needed to take. After much faffling, pondering, and a surprising bit of ratiocination, I decided just to take one of the Warfarin of what should have been last night doses. How I arrived at this decision, I’ve not 
the foggiest idea, but it sounded right to me at the time.
I made a brew of Assam tea and went to the multi-tasked front room. (Office, Computer room, balcony room, bedroom, Sock-Glide Torture room, and Stroke Physio Exercise room) and took another shot of the weather outside.
Which was still raining, but less misty now.
I got the computer going to update, finalise, and send off the Friday post. And a call to the Porcelain Throne arrived. So, off to the wet room again. The evacuation was the usual struggle to get started, followed by the now familiar ‘Plonk’ or thud and a splash with water spraying up onto the bottom.
When I stood up, what gobsmacking colour things were. The same colour that the Humber Desert lorries were painted during the second world war, a sort of light beige. I ought to mention this to the doctor if it comes out the same colour again. Which reminds me, I still haven’t heard anything about the Doctor referring me for a paediatrician? I checked out the legs. Whatever it was that was coming on the right 
leg shin, yesterday, had now gone? The fluid retention was coming back.
Although even now still tender, the stubbed toe when I fell over in the kitchen looked much improved, however. I got the finger and hand shakes just as I was taking this picture of the feet. Tsk!
Back to the utility room, and pressed on with doing the updating of the diary. The fingers were still getting the electric-like shakes, and this persisted for an hour or more. It’s never lasted this long before. But, they did tell me at the ulcer clinic, that there was nothing they could do about the Axonotmesis, and it will only get worse. So, I have been warned. The stroke might have brought it on more quickly? Most annoying and time-consuming all the correcting time needed! Ah, well!
I got the oven on low, ready for preparing Josie’s weekend meal later on. Then made a start on this blog. The fingers were back to normal, with only a few-second shaking bout every now and then. After a few hours, I decided to get the ablutions tended to, so put the computer off as, since the last Windows Update, it will not go into Sleep-Mode again! Humph!
I made up the rubbish bags and called to see Josie and tell her when they would be ready, about 13:00hrs. She thought I looked a bit peaky and took the bags to the waste chute for me. I thanked her and we had a little chinwag, then back to the flat to get Josie’s nosh prepared.
Not very successful with the cheesy spuds, I’m afraid. I dropped one, and the husk broke. I saved the flesh, but the skin on the floor had to be dished. So, then I found they had not been cooked through properly. Any amount of bashing would not get rid of the lumps. So, I scooped the skinless potatoes into an oven dish and baked them for ages, but it was not very good. In fact, I think my worst effort ever! This got me feeling a little down again. The meal looked okay in the end, but the lumpy potatoes to the edge off of it for me. The smoked herring in tomato and veg sauce, garden peas and mushrooms were fine. I delivered it to her door and explained about the cheesy potatoes.
An hour or so later, I got my nosh cooking.
A feeling of exhaustion arrived.
Josie rang the door chimes and returned the dish and tray. She said the potatoes were fine, but I think she might have been being kind to me. Hehe! I handed her a pack of the lemon wafers for afters, she likes them as much as I do.
I got the nosh ate up, but the sudden drop in health meant I didn’t really enjoy it. By the time I’d eaten it, washed up, and took the medications, all I was capable of was sitting there watching TV, with the occasional short involuntary kip now and then. After one of these nod-offs, I decided to watch the DVD film, Equaliser 2 again and tried not to nod-off this time.
Of course, I nodded off.
I woke around eleven o’clock PM and got up. Still feeling a little groggy for some reason? Always the weekend, when there is no staff on site to help, innit! Hehe! Never mind, if things get bad I can use the Alarm Alert Wristlet button.
03:30hrs. Although sleep was in short supply last night, plenty of nightmarish dreams were supplied to torture my poor old blood-short brain. I can only recall bits of any detail, being chased in crumbling abandoned buildings again, falling from a plane, a self-operation to replace a certain undersized appendage, being kept in school… not the most cheerful of things to let one’s thoughts wander over, pretty glad to wake up, actually. Within a few seconds, the mechanics of the body informed me I needed a wee-wee (Fancy that, me, wanting a wee. Hehehe!). 
ankle gave way. I’m still not sure how I managed to avoid going over, but was nervous enough about it, to decide to put on the Ankle Support Strapping, as the toe was looking far less virulent and not so painful. Which meant tackling the infamously dangerous Sock-Glide! 
I then made a check of the pins and the toe first. A new, erm, unknown blotch had appeared of the top of the left leg. 
while I was using the glide. Luckily, none came this time. 
Accifauxpas, I was not letting my guard down and remained vigilant to the dangers that lurked from the mega-difficult to use locking device. 
The wee-weeing suddenly became very frequent, they were all still of the SSWW, though. 
I checked the hand washing drying. 
I went to get the potato and cheese ready, and getting something out of the cupboard, I pulled out the vinegar, a box of tomato puree and a tin of tomatoes out of the closet – knocked off the basin of potato and cheese, banged my right hand (decent bruise coming up), then lost my rag and sore at myself! It seems every time I get partly contended I forget about the hand and leg shakes. I am now fed up with myself, and have to clean-up and save what I can to make the meal. 
Excessive weariness dawned on me. Computer off, and I g
ecliner, without as much as a twinge from Arthur Itis or Anne Gyna! Off for a wee-wee, of the SSWW variety. 
Continued: I then foolishly took the morning medications! Not the evening ones! 
Continued: They looked excessively pale again. 
I wrote down some notes, but there was not much to remember, apart from the changing emotions. It was night time, and people were encouraging me to swim over the river Trent with them. I had heavy clothing on, but none of it mattered at the time, because I really did believe that I had lost my phobia and learnt to swim? I joined a queue of people, waiting for my turn to get into the water… With seconds all the same people, were on a beach, nighttime again, with intentions to swim the channel! This, I was not prepared for, and started to panic and find ways of not going… I recall sitting on the stone wall with my feet dangling in the water… I’m pretty sure this was the time I woke up, needing a wee-wee. 
I sat and took a photo of the pins. Not so blotchy today, but a well-fluid-filled pair of limbs, I’ve got.
As I was leaving the wet room, the intercom rang out, the Morrison chap was early, but this was nae bother. 
At the bus stop, Mary and Pete shared a chinwag with me. Caught the bus into Arnold, and had I had a bit of a shoppers delight visit. 
I paid at the self-serve tills. 
to me, bless him! A big chap too. Ahem! 
At the top of the pathway, I had to take a shot of this lovely wildflower. It looked so fresh and beautiful to me. 
Through the car park to the bus stop shelter. There were not many free parking spaces available this Friday. 
But, once in the foyer, May and Gaynor who were sat there, let me have a gossip and
What a pose May gave me for her photo! 
I got the dinner going and took the evening medications. 
By the time I’d covered the few feet to get to the bucket and relieve myself of the SNSWW (Short-No-Sensation-Wee-Wee), I had changed my mind about the stubbed-toe-pain. It is 
still stinging, now I had been standing and walking on the plates again! Tsk!
The pins (legs) appeared to have lost some water retention. They looked considerably less warped and misshaped, too. Also, I think a little less anaemic looking (Or maybe that was the lighting in the front room?). 
Next, I made a brew, then started on updating the Tuesday blog for publication. This was done with reasonable alacrity, thanks to the ring and fingers end temporarily losing their electric-like jumping and dancing every time they come into contact with anything hard, like the keyboard buttons. Nice to do some work without the frustration of this, peripheral neurology ailment. Or, as the medical centre called it, ‘One of your too-many medical issues, you have’ when they refused to tend to my feet and nails, on Monday. That reminds me, if I have not done the calendar wrong again, and Caroline comes today, I must remember to inform her that the doctor told the Age UK lady when she rang the surgery, in an effort to get help for me; She (The Doctor) would either phone me or call on me this afternoon. Surprised me that did, she’s never been to the old house of new flat before? And, of course, there has been no contact made.
Then, I went on Facebook to add some photos I’ve not had time to do and catch up on my beloved TFZer Facebooking. 
(or Sophie) might go ahead, if it does, we will try out the four-wheeled trolley on a bus trip.
I thought on the walk back; I knew it was inevitable, the ending of the visits, but sadness still overcame me.
I worked on some CorelDraw graphic making for a while. But the mind was stewing again, fretting over my actions, choices etc. I soon gave up through lack of concentration and made an early meal.
Being in a rush to get to the EGPWWB (Emergency Grey Plastic Wee-wee Bucket), and the resting having eased off the pain from the blackened stubbed toe, I was soon off out of the £300, c1968, second-hand, grotty-beige coloured rickety recliner… and fell back into the same within seconds! The shock of the agonising pain when I stood up made me fall back into the ageing recliner again. It took a few minutes for me to get over the shock. And the familiar aching and hurting began all over again. I did manage to get the slippers on, but that was because I was in need desperately now, for the emergency grey bucket! 
I decided to get the daily hand-washing done. Only one shirt, flannels and one pair of socks to do this morning. I eagerly got them washed and rinsed, rung-out as best as I could manage, and hung up the shirt, and put the socks and flannels to dry on the flat airer. Smug-Mode-Adopted.
Back to making a brew. Took the medications and did the health checks – ’twas a bit of a surprise with some readings this morning. Sys 165. Dia 143, but the Pulse was only 56? Low surely? The temperature was 35.7°c. I checked on Google: High environmental temperatures can be dangerous to your body. In the range of 90˚ and 105˚F (32˚ and 40˚C), you can experience heat cramps and exhaustion. Between 105˚ and 130˚F (40˚ and 54˚C), heat exhaustion is more likely. You should limit your activities at this range. I’m confused more now. Tsk! 
I went onto the balcony to take a picture of below, through tone of the uncleanable multi and dirty glass panes. 
unbidden and uncherished execrated windows, to view outside and below. 
Unfortunately, this involved my suffering a new toe-stubbing one more time! Yet again, against the WC risers metal legs! 
I merely laughed it off, with gay abandonment and quite a little laugh! I may have said something like “Well, fancy that!”
Suddenly. I decided to get the hand-washing out of the way the first job of the day. So, feeling a little cocky, I poddled to the kitchen without the walking stick; just as I was going over the door tread, I gave myself the worst ever Toe-Stubbing of my life! 
Nothing to do about it, but wait and hope the pain eases, so I can get my shoes on later, and make it to the clinic. 
The fingers were so bad this morning, the faintest touch of the tips against anything at all, and they would start dancing and jumping. However, I discovered the new Canon camera, could be used with the left hand, and still allow the shutter (due to its location nearer the centre top) to be pressed with a left finger. Not perfect, but overall better than trying to use the shaking right hand and fingers. Bit of luck there! But using the keyboard and mouse remains a battle of wills, with the fingers usually winning. I’m taking longer and longer doing the blogs and CorelDrawing. Phwert! 
It may prove difficult, with catching the 09:28hr bus, it is early, I’ll need to pay the £2.30 fare. Too early to use the bus pass. Oh, dear, what do I do? I suppose I’ll have to get the 10:02hrs one. Which will mean waiting for ages to get seen, and another long, late day for me. Humph! 
I went to make a brew. Got the shakes just as I was refilling the kettle – the result, the finger needed some antiseptic cream putting on it, to lessen the sensation from the scolding. I am now officially, fed-up, in constant pain, and missing the nurses so much! Haha! Surely things must get better soon, I thought. 
I checked the toe as the pain is just not easing off at all, and when it comes in contact with anything, it gets unbearable! The end of the toe was going black, I think.
I handed some nibbles to Obersturmführeress Warden and Operatic Singer, Julie. And set off on my hobble to Winchester Street to catch the 40 bus to the clinic. 
car zoomed around the bend and came close to clobbering me. I honestly don’t think the driver saw me at all! Grumph! My luck might be changing though, at least she missed me! Tsk! 
ed the St Anns Well Road and began to walk to the Health Centre. When the ignorant imbecile of a pavement Cyclist, weaved his way through some pedestrians, and on to the road. How he missed the chap crossing the road was a miracle. Again, I don’t think the bozo even noticed the gentleman as he shot between the man as he went off of the pavement! Grrr! 
I kept pressing the button and got these rather failed shots in. 
a sneer and a gone-out expression, one laughed, and the other one showed no interest at all. 
. Chips, yellow tomatoes and some Polish pork loin (Sopocka) wholemeal bread thin sarnies, an apple, and a lemon mousse. Ate all of this prandicle up, with degust. A flavour-rating 0f 8/10 given to this feast. 
04:40hrs. I woke after laying praying 
A most delusive sound rang out from somewhere. A kind of vague, wailing noise with coughing sounds in the background? This happened twice in the space of thirty seconds. It was rather loud. I heard it easily enough, without any hearing aids in? But couldn’t locate the source of the worrying noise. Tsk! The plumbing, perhaps?
the dancing-fingers k
knees were not so gnarled either. But some new papsules in number were appearing again now. And one leg was a little larger than the other. 
I limped along, with the pains and injuries from the ablution session still sore. Hehehe! Arrived at the shed, and turned to take this picture of Windwood Heights, without any lorries, vans or worked; it being a Saturday. 
I tried to get a decent shot of some magpies in the shrubbery as I walked along the rubbish-strewn footpath. 
Then another bird came down to join its mate on the floor. I patiently waited so long to get a good picture. 
I just got the lens through the wire fencing to take this photo of the linking passageway between Woodthorpe Court and Winwood Courts. Not operational yet of course, but it looks good and airy, and will keep us old uns indoors in the rain? 
. 
It was from the NHS concerning Bowel Cancer Screening. 
I got the nosh prepared and served up.
Got to sleep around 03:00hrs I woke in need of a wee-wee at 05:35hrs. My EQ told me this was going to be a stinker-of-a-day. A fraught, exigent sort of Sunday, lonely as well. (It was right too!)
it was blowing a good bit out there Brr! 
stroke, I can’t believe how weak I am now.
The rain came down, and it took my spirits with it a little.
. And watched the rain falling for a while.
I went to make a brew and took a photograph of the night scene from the unwanted, new, light & view blocking, multi-window panes that need cleaning, and I can’t reach to clean them, windows; That will require the use of the stepladder to take pictures of, or see anything down on Chestnut Walk. Such as ambulances, paramedics, fire engines, Police Cars or muggers. 
. A heavy shirt and a pair of bamboo socks. Oh, and the Ankle-Strappings.
So I carried on with the hand-washing, and did my best to wring them out and got them on the slow-airer flatbed, and hung some up.
By the time I had risen to my feet, Duodenal Donald and Reflux Roger both kicked-off at the same time. I made for the medicine drawer in the kitchen, to take the morning doses with an extra Omeprazole, codeine phosphate and a great-guzzle of the 
At least the results for this session had gone way done. And the sphygmomanometer worked first time as well!
I lost all interest in anything. (Found out later I’d missed the medication doses as well. Humph! 
Got the continental brown bread, the lemon dessert and a bottle of lemon and lime spring water, and back to the £300 second-hand recliner with the tray, to gobble it all up.
The evening sky was worth a picture taking of it, I thought.