Tuesday 19th October 2021
My Porcelain Throne Marathon
Double-Barreled
Agony would best describe this session!
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Sat sitting, utilising the WordPress Blogosphere,
Facebook played up, it went a bit queer,
Problems were slowly driving me crazier,
Then things started to get somewhat peskier,
I got distracted, and this much was clear,
The innards churned and rumbled, Oh, dear!
To the Porcelain Throne, in a rush and full of fear!
Rock-solid Torpedo, stuck halfway; what a plight!
I struggled to free it, pain to expedite,
Harold’s Haemorrhoids I did excite!
They stung and bled, more than a mite,
The crossword, 6-letter word, trite?
The evacuating product was just too tight!
After a long painful, harrowing fight…
Suddenly, it came out alright!
Cleaned, and medicated with agility,
And a certain joyous alacrity,
But this was not the end of the activity…
Life often shows endless alterability…
A case for me, of banal carnosity!
Oh, what, an annoying bother and pain!
The evacuation had started again,
Soft as mush this time, almost liquid?
I’d no control over what it did,
Had to clean up the splatted semi-fluid,
Sessions like this are inhumane!
It was particularly stinky and horrid,
Sensations from burning pain to torrid…
The first one, reluctant, gigantic, immane!
The follow up virtually liquid, it’s insane!
A daily task, that brought me exhaustibility,
Can I claim uniqueness or exclusivity?
Or being a fool, for Odeing with such clarity?
I think the fool bit is right, actually!
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Oded in Support of Nottingham Branch of the Bulgarian Pregnant Koala Appreciation Society
Donations Accepted. Billum somewhere near Utah.
Only to find the damned thing had been bleeding earlier in the night and had dried hard to the inside of the protection pants! Oh, ooh… argh! That was five minutes of pain and ten-minutes of cleaning up I could have well done without. Sorted things though, I think.
0350hrs: Got the Saturday post updated.
Took a break from computerisationing and made up the dosage pots ready for next week.
about Nottingham Street Art creating.
No sleep, so I got up and made the meal.
Back to the canteen and did the Health Checks and took the medications.
Then as I started this diary going, the flipping whatever it is with the right wrist started again!
Sweetly cured mackerel strips, surimi sticks – both with the new fish sauce (Anchovy) pored on them. Baked beans with balsamic vinegar and softly cooked frits with distilled vinegar. A banana and a lemon Fool Dessert.
Made a note on the scribble-pad to remind me of the Audio Clinic at 1130hrs in the morning.
ennis or Trotsky Terence at the Throne. That was a nice change.
The hue of the scene from out side prompted me to take this photograph. I thought it was rather colourful and a bit different to what it has been lately.
I was also impressed with how the fingers were far less bent and warped today as well.
Emails checked.
Wafers arrived, late, but I’m going to get the ablutions done and have a hobble in my Tree Copse, legs permitting.
Off down the lift and out into the daylight, at last.
It was a tasty one, beef pie, Chinese mushrooms, garden peas, boiled potatoes and beetroots.
Back down to move the clothes into the dryer. Popped out the foyer door to see if I could get a photograph on the Copse in the dark.
Off to the Social Hour.
Foolishly I got on the wrong bus, muggins here got on the inbound L9 in error for the outbound one.
My alternative plan was to go in the Victoria Centre Mall and go into Tesco and have a wander around. The intended Sainsbury expedition will have to be done tomorrow. Tsk!
Got some bits and wandered out of the centre by the shortest route, as it was getting a bit dangerous with the crowds so large, to walk safely.
I had a further poddle around and then Anne Gyna started playing me up, so I made my way to the bus stop to catch an L9 bus back to the welcoming ‘So glad I live here now’ flat.
Caught the bus back to the flats at the bus stop just out of view at the end of the side road in this photographicalisation above.
The meal I’d placed in foil to try and keep it warm. It wasn’t too bad actually.
Computer on. Did a graphic for Sir Martin Shuttlecock for his birthday. A grand chap.
Carried on updating the diaries.
Went to make another cup of tea and the view from the kitchen window was nice now the mist had cleared somewhat.
The view from the kitchen window. Three sets of Christmas garden decorations now.
Hunger attacked me, despite only having eaten a few hours earlier?
0240hrs, Down and moved the things into the dryer, wiped the machines. Up and did some work on the computer. Started work on the diaries and graphicationalisationing.
Made a mug of tea and took the morning medications. At this stage, 045hrs, the first Whoppsiedangleplop of the day occurred. I dropped the pot of tablets, bent down to retrieve it and knocked the bottle of antacid off the kitchen counter and what a horrible mess it made as the bottle broke and the medicine looked like gunge and stuck like gunge to the kitchen floor! Picking out the brown glass bits was easy compared to cleaning up the liquid that had clung to the floor like a moveable glue!
Tried using paper towels but that wasn’t very successful, so I got the mop and bucket out – eventually the floor was presentable it – but it took as long again to get the mop and bucket cleaned, and it took two rolls of Blitz kitchen towels, flash liquid, bleach, washing up liquid and a lot of swearing to clean the sink that I cleaned the mop and bucket in!
Good job I’d just collected this month’s two bottles yesterday. So I started the last one off.
Made my way straight to the bank and they couldn’t find Duncan’s number on my mobile. I needed to call him cause he knew where I’d concealed the number, Humpf!
Nipped down to Broad Marsh, to take a photograph of a particular area to put on a Nottingham site, along with one from the 1950’s.
Back up to the Slab Square, where they SSE electric company workmen were busy setting up the Christmas decorations, on and around the Council House.
Where I was in luck today.
Walked back through the Victoria Mall (Centre) and noticed this Pizza place, The Stonebaked Pizza Company. Four staff and no customers.
I took a picture from the bus stop, facing where the bus would arrive from. Can you see some of Fothergill Watson designed building on the left-hand side?
At the flats stop, I found Mary, having a rest on the bench there, before she carried on into the flats. I stayed with her, and we had a gossip.
Got the meal prepared. Put the sauce, and mini sausages in a saucepan were slowly warming.
Got the washing, which I’d got ready last night, all sorted and waiting to go down to the laundry room. When I arrived at the machines, around 0325hrs, someone had used both dryers and they had not used a washer. Naughty! Still, it didn’t work out too bad, the spinner with the timer showing indicated it had 34 minutes left. So I did my wash on the short cycle which takes 30 minutes. Returned to the flat, made a cuppa, started the laptop up and started to sort the Inchcock Today posts.
Back down to the laundry room and the lady who’d used both dryers arrived to retrieve her washing. She did not clean out the filter on either machine –Double naughty! She took her things away and I cleaned out both filters for her. Transferred my stuff to the dryer and back up to the flat.
Made sure the expensive mini M&S Quiche Lorraine was safely in the refrigerator for later.
Did some Facebooking.
The drizzle started to fall. 
I had a wander around and a slow walk to the Victoria Market (Mall).
however, have some of the Fresh Cream French Horns on sale… Ahem! Along with cheapo cheese slices and some new season English Worcester apples.
Set about doing Jane’s sad last photographs of Queenie. A real lady in the cat world that will be missed terribly.
Jane told me she is the only female in the house now.
Got the fodder meal ready and digested it.