Inchcock Today – Sat/Sun 22/23rd Dec 2018: Self-pitying, Porcelain Throne, and Whoopsiedangleplops Ridden Weekend. Humph!

Saturday 22nd December 2018

Bulgarian: Събота 22 декември 2018 г.

00:25hrs. For a complete change, I woke this morning ‘Not’ wanting to recall any of the dreams I’d been having, but bits still insisted on filtering through, possibly the worst nightmare I’ve had all year. Just about every one of my many mistakes, bad judgements, and embarrassing episodes were momentarily relived, and it wasn’t very nice at all!

I lay feeling sorry for myself for a while, when I opened my eyes, the scene was so soul-destroying – I’d been at the Nocturnal Nibbling again! As it dawned on me how many bits of fodder I had on, and around my body, the self-hatred and frustration grew! (Please see the Morning Thoughts, above). I wonder if I can get some help with this problem? Mind you, it’s not every night, just now and then that I gorge myself in my sleep. And, I have really tried this last couple of weeks to attain a degree of abstemiousness… He says, looking for some lame excuse. What a yold, Tsk!

I moved on mind-wise and lay thinking about what is on for today, and it was like someone suddenly released a hose pipe! A dire struggle ensued to get out of the £300 second-hand recliner and to the wet room in time. Then en route, I realised that the (First of many) Porcelain Throne was required as well! My first evacuation of the day was one of the mini-rugby ball types. But no haemorrhaging. It’s not been a great start to the day, I thought. (An understatement as I was to discover later! Oy Vey!

Anitcepticated the hands, and off to get the Health Checks done.

No surprised in the readings and the sphygmomanometer worked first try. Took the medications with some milk for a change, then made a brew of the Strong Assam tea.

I started to shiver a bit. After previously feeling all warm and snug? I didn’t need the EQ to tell me I was coming down with something or other. For once, I was so glad that no one will be calling on me.

No sooner had I sat on the computer chair, another hasty visit to the Porcelain Throne (2nd) was needed! A massive evacuation, this time of the normal mode, but a lot of it. Washed and antisepticated the dandies and contact points this time, with the Dettol. As I came out of the wet room back to the computer, a bit of sweating was starting, I took off my woolly hat and jumper. I reckon I’ll have Diahorrea Donald as a visitor for a while.

When I closed down the computer yesterday, I did it with the Update & Close option. So, once again I was not too bothered about all the flashing and stuttering that went on. Huh!

I made a start on this blog. Slow work, because the Liberty-Global Virgin Media Internet was so stuttery again!

I put the heavy dressing gown on as well now, it felt so cold everywhere in the flat. The slow computer was driving mad!

So I went to make another brew of tea, and get some mushrooms in the crockpot. I decided it might be a good idea if I made a stew of some sort. I have pork chinks in the fridge I can add to the mushrooms with some vegetables (parsnips, peas, and carrots) later when I get the cooker started.

Blimey, it still feels nippy in this kitchen, more so than the other rooms?

The thermometer read 9°c – 59°f, it must have got colder overnight. I took this photo to show the lights outside.

Then, as I returned with my mug of tea to the computer: I had to veer off to the wet room, and Porcelain Throne visit three! Oy-Yoy-Yoy!

An incident-filled session ensued. The passing style changed again, this time to a liquefied and messy mode!

And there was a lot of bleeding! Heck of job cleaning and medicating things after the evacuation. Tsk! I think this may be the last of the Throne visits, as there has been so much passed, there cannot be much left in there? (He says hopefully).

Then I spotted just one of the EIBWBBBs (Evil Ironclad Boll-Weevil black biting beetles) He or she was dead, and although it doesn’t really show on this picture, it was a massive beast.

Back to this lactarium.

Then I realised I had not yet finished off the Friday diary. Nitwit!

Before I started the updating, I nipped into the kitchen to add the ingredients to the mushrooms in the crock-pot: Sliced some parsnips, cut some pork into pieces and put them in with the mushrooms. I added some caramelised gravy stock and Hoisin sauce, gave it a good stir and started the slow-cooker on low.

I noticed that the temperature had shot up to 64°f, now.

I then got on with the updating and got it sent off to WordPress. Better late, than never!

I sensed that I could feel a draught coming from somewhere, but could not find the source. Is that possible? Here I am in my jammie-bottoms, dressing gown, slippers and with my knitted hat on, the temperature tells me is no longer cold… but that is how I feel. Cold!

The shakes and shivers are far less frequent than earlier, though. 

As I was taking this photograph out of the light and view-blocking kitchen window with the ledge that sticks out so far I cannot manipulate the camera if I want to make a downward shot, like this one and see the viewer at the same time… what was I saying? Hehe!

The Hunger Pangs arrived, and I made a mini breakfast of a slice of pork pie and some mini tomatoes.

The top of the salt pot fell. The mystery is where all the salt that fell out went to? Fair enough some went into the container, but where did the rest of it go?

It’s little mysteries like this that seem to evade other folks. Like the enigma of noises, I hear but cannot locate? The EIBWBBBs (Evil Ironclad Boll-Weevil black biting beetles) infestation, the most unreliable memory and concentration levels, etc. That seems to have followed me all of my sad, miserable, confused, bewildering, inscrutableness-filled failed life, and are still visiting me now, in my continued route to full decrepitude classification! Hehe! Just thought I’d mention it!

Had a few Highland Shortie biscuits, then fell asleep sat in the computer chair! Oh, dear!

Hours later when I woke again, I went on to Facebooking on the TFZer site.

Did the Health Checks and got the nosh ready.

I deliberately dished up some extra gravy with the concoction of pork and vegetables so I could enjoy dipping the broken off pieces of the gloriously tasting Soughdough baguette. Mmm! Not as tasty as I’d hoped it would be, nut the bread was enjoyed. Gave this one a Flavour Rating of 6/10.

Drained and unbelievably still feeling so tired. I got the fourth summoning to the Porcelain Throne! Another fluid evacuation. It confuses me as to how quickly the innards could have turned things like this and got the fodder through the various inner workings and out, so fast!

Cleaned the pots, and settled mega-early into the £300 second-hand recliner. Viewed the Freeview schedule, and found three films one after the other, that I thought I’d watch.

Got up to do the Health Checks to find that Dizzy Dennis and Shaking Shaun were both active.

Not a really disagreeable day, but the ailments coming and going were a tad irksome. I’ve had far worse ones. Got the head down again, and fell asleep in seconds.

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Sunday 23rd December 2018

 Yiddish: זונטיק דעצעמבער 23, 2018

00:15hrs. I woke in desperate need of the Porcelain Throne! I almost threw my elephantine body mass off of the £300 second-hand recliner, clouting my knee of the Ottoman as a hastily rushed to the wet room. Yet again, making it just in time. (This can’t last, I fear my next visit will not be so lucky for me!)

The evacuation was a typical Haemorrhoid Harold affair, messy and with great patience needed, my knowing full well a second dollop was brewing to follow on! (Experience told me this, and I was right for once). I did not move from the seat, I dare not! I got the Clarkson book and read a few pages, before the almost-liquid second-coming, came! Hahaha!

Another worrying factor, I nearly nodded-off while sat there reading the book? This concerned me a bit, so I cleaned up and got the computer on to find out what I could, of the noddings-off I’m suffering. I found this advice:

• Many cases of narcolepsy are thought to be caused by a lack of the brain chemical hypocretin (also known as orexin), which regulates sleep. This deficiency is thought to result from the immune system mistakenly attacking parts of the brain that produce hypocretin. A number of factors may increase a person’s risk of narcolepsy or cause an autoimmune problem, including:
  
• anyone elderly, with a high EQ
• an inherited genetic fault
• hormonal changes, including those that occur during puberty or the menopause
  major psychological stress
• a sudden change in sleep patterns
• an infection, such as swine flu or a streptococcal infection
• having the flu vaccine Pandemrix

Research is yet to confirm whether all of these play a role in narcolepsy.

I just ended up putting it down to my having been such a bundle of energy and working such long hours for so many years, and I’m getting old and paying for it now. Huh!

Got the Health Checks sorted. The flipping Sys and Pulse were high! 

Got it finished and went to make a brew and get some potatoes into the crock-pot. 

I intended to let them marinate in the water, seasoned with some strong Balsamic vinegar. I change the plans after I’d put light Soy Sauce in by mistake. Klutz!

While doing this, I had a brave-wave of an idea for a humorous rhyme about this weeks thoughts. Seen above, I added it to this post, as I had already posted it off stand alone this morning.) So I got it made up and sent off. When I create these ode-thoughts, if they do not flow out of the brain, I abandon them. This one shows the state my mind must have been in. Haha!

I went to make another brew of tea, a Strong English Breakfast one this time.

As I put the kettle on, a second summoning to the Porcelain Throne arrived. Off to the wet room. A particularly reluctant evacuation at first this time, again giving me time to read more of the Clarkson book (Nearly finished now). I even had a glance around for any signs of any of the EIBWBBBs (Evil Ironclad Boll-Weevil black biting beetles), but like yesterday, I could only one on the floor near the shower drain, but this was a live one, and soon made its way to and disappeared down the drain. The evacuations might have reluctant to move, but it was terribly splattery when it did come. I wonder if a new problem had affected the splanchnic department, somewhere, or is it the foods I have been eating?

Around 0500hrs I heard some noises again, as I have been doing lately around this time, but they were different this time. Repeated sort of long scraping sounds, but of short duration? I had a wander around, but by the time I started hobbling around, they had stopped again.

I opened the light and view-blocking new window in the kitchen and stuck the camera put taking a blind shot of below. The rain had stopped now, and I think that the giant puddle near the compound gate to where Willmott Dixon is building Winwood Court, had gone down a lot.

Unbelievable! Another trip to the Porcelain Throne! Hard to understand as well, was the again changed nature of the evacuation! Back to the hard mini-rugby ball-shaped escapees! Tsk! No hesitating in exiting either, no a little bit of discomfort. Still, on the bright side, there was no bleeding again. So, from diahorrea to liquidified messy splattering, next to mountainous rock-hard granite-like… Oh, never mind, it’ll change again next time I expect, if there is a next time! Tsk!

Cleaned up and medicated things in need of the same, and went on Facebooking.

Sister Jane rang. She gave me a few clandestine verbal telling-offs. (She is brilliant at this, I’d say up to Margaret Thatcher standard!) We chatted as I felt more and more guilty about my Sister-pointed-out failings. Hehehe!

Got the nosh sorted. Beef pie, potatoes with a drop of BBQ sticky sauce on each half, tomatoes and mushrooms. Followed with a naughty, wicked Limoncello dessert. A Flavour-Rating of 8.5/10 given.

I ate up the small but decent meal and placed the tray on the side chair. I thought I may have difficulty in getting to sleep tonight, with my dropping off for so long in the chair earlier.

Some strange noises were heard again, this time they sounded like whining and tapping sounds at the same time. I knew there was no work taking place?

I went out into the light and view-blocking, letting in the rain balcony, with its finger trapping window opening mechanism and misted up in the rain glass with gaps between them. The noises lasted a good few minutes, and I began to think they might just be in my head. I could not locate where they were coming from, seemingly all around?

Got a visit from Dizzy Dennis as I sat back down in the £300 second-hand recliner. Only a short one, though. And it did not stop me nodding off quickly, and for an uninterrupted five-hours! No waking in need of the Throne, that arrived as soon as I woke up again at 23:25hrs! Tsk!