Saturday 30th March 2019
שבת 30 מערץ 2019 – Yiddish
01:15hrs. I woke with the occasion implosion – followed an explosion, from within the catacombs of my innards. “Ah, I thought, at last, a possible successful evacuation is building up. I felt quite smug at my ploy of having the chilli meal last night, in support of the many failed Senna tablets! I slowly began to move the joints and limbs of my overly-stomach-burdened body. Anny Gyna, Duodenal Donald, Reflux Roger, Hernia Henry, Kidneys Kevin and so on; all seemed in a good mood with me!
A cracking rumble from the innards, encourage me to evacuate the rickety, now working again £300, ci 1968 second-hand recliner with all the haste I could muster! Off to the wet room, and onto the Porcelain Throne.
Porcelain Throne Acitivites: *(Things are told on the following sections, just how they were. If you are disinclined to read of such activities, please move down to the photo of the sphygmomanometer, thank you).
Things began to move, as soon as I sat down. But, so slowly and painfully. I’ve often referred to such evacuation contents as torpedo-like in the past. This morning’s agony-ridden description would be Submarine-like! How my five-foot long canal from the end of the small intestines to my rear-end evacuation point the last part of the digestive system stayed undamaged amazed me. How it was not torn-open, and how such a mass of that size got through my tubes, I just don’t know!
After I had recovered from the shock and suffering, another thing puzzled me; How the heck did the plumbing manage to get all that down to the sewers? The best part of the whole episode was that I did not see a single speck of blood anywhere during or after the procedure. I was a bit nervous after cleaning up and going to make a mug of tea, as I found that wind was escaping of its own accord, for several minutes. I assumed this was my innards, either celebrating getting rid of or preparing for the next dollop brewing up. Hehehe!
* Got the Health Checks done.
Sys 138, Dia 68, Pulse 86 and Temperature 34.5°, all looking good methinks.
I got the computer on and started on this blog creation. Made up the days Thought Graphic, and had a DTAAD (Dribble-tinkle-and-all-done) wee-wee. With sharp involuntary bursts of what sounded like a two-stroke engine from the rear-end, bursting forth, and painful they all were too!
I got far as here on this page and realised I had not updated yesterday’s blog yet, let alone sent it off. So, I got in with doing that. Klutz!
*(Things are told in the following paragraph, just how they were. If you are hesitant to read of such activities, please move down to the next section, thank you). This did not last long, for another Porcelain Throne visit was demanded! This evacuation was nowhere near as painful as the first one, thank heavens. But it did start Harold’s Haemorrhoids bleeding and stinging badly. The volume was much less but messier. It took an inordinately long time to clean up afterwards.
04:15hrs, I finally got the Friday blog finished and sent off to WordPress. Phew!
Things were beginning to get active still. The unstoppable aromaless ‘phut-phut-eeck’ winds were escaping with worrying regularity. The innards are now contumacious and bubbling. They are really going to work on giving me some discomfort! I don’t want to sound like an alter-cocker, but several areas of my insides, seem to become more active and harmful, at the same time? And the wee-wees are starting again, albeit they are of the DTAAD (Dribble-tinkle-and-all-done) style wee-wee.
I suppose I should have expected some discomfort, pains, Accifauxpas and Whoopsiedangleplops like this to arrive this morning. After over 44hrs without a Porcelain Visit. The fun and pleasure of Sister Jane and Pete visiting me yesterday, and the good night’s sleep. With my luck and record, it is no surprise to me that with my terrible ill-fated fortuity, there is always the expectancy of a cataclysm, calamity, affliction, catastrophe and or disaster around the corner to suffer. No doubt, they were divined and retributed for me by the Greek Goddess of lousy luck, Tyche, bless her. In repayment of my recent bit of good luck, (For one-and-a-half hours yesterday; Jane & Pete’s visit) and as a lesson for me not to get expectant or hopeful of anything nice, prosperousness or pleasant happening to me, really. ‘Self-Pity and Sorry-for-Myself mode engaged. Hehehe!
I went to make a brew of tea, and to take the belated medications that I forgot to eat earlier. (Twit!) I had an extra Omeprazole and Ramipril, to try and calm down the innards and Duodenal Donald who’d started to kick-off as well! Fed-Up Mode increased to Defcon 3, Haha!
I took a photograph from the unwanted, impossible to access to clean, hard to open and close, light & view-blocking new windows. I took this in response to my hearing that whining noise again. I thought I might see something outside that might have been the source of the humming sound. But no.
I got back doing this post. The winds still involuntarily coming from the rear, got more frequent, until minutes after I had to visit the Porcelain Throne for the third time!
I far easier passage this time, although it left me feeling more sorer in the rear quarters. And, Harolds Haemorrhoids did not bleed. So that was good.
I went on the WordPress reader page. Then onto Facebook.
I stopped and bravely, I thought, had a bash at trying to cut the worst of my toenails.
No wonder I thought I was having difficulties in keeping my balance. I discovered that the left leg was more fluid-filled and puffy than the right one! Hehehe!
I only managed to cut the two big nails. It was physically impossible for me to do any more, because of the pain. Hey-ho!
I decided it was time for some breakfast. Cornflakes. Had another DTAAD wee-wee.
Utter fatigue came over me, I tried to sort some cupboards out in the kitchen to try and pull myself out of the sudden mental and physical collapse. I did well for half-an-hour, or so, then Anne Gyna kicked off, and I stopped. Sat down and put on a Dr Who DVD, nodded off for a few minutes, and woke up in need of yet another Porcelain Throne visit! These trips are leaving me very sore in certain areas now! Humph! Where it was all coming from, remains a mystery, but it had changed to the messy variety now, and cleaning up afterwards at least helped concentrate the vagueness and disinterest of the mind.
While I was up, I got the dinner sorted out. I deliberately made a small portioned one. Sicilian tomatoes, Melton pork pie and a handful of chips, a few slices of the Milk Roll loaf, and a small pot of lemon yoghourt.
I ate it all, but it took a while, as for some reason I was finding it hard to swallow. So I made sure I masticated the food as well as I could with my shortage of teeth. Hehe! I still enjoyed it, though, a flavour rating of 8.2/10 was granted.
A check on the state of the pins (legs), revealed knobbly shins and some new speckly-spots and blood papsules on the anaemic looking limbs. Hey-ho!
Fell asleep for a while, and was woken with Duodenal Donald and Anne Gyna both going at it, creating discomfort for me. I took a few good swigs of the inefficient, ineffective, inefficacious, inadequate, feeble prescription medicine, to try and calm thing down inside, along with the usual medications.
As I was settling back down in the £300, second-hand ci1968 recliner, another summoning to the Porcelain Throne arrived. Cleaned up afterwards again, and returned to the recliner with a stingy, sore tender rear-end! I put some Germolene on specific areas.
I got things in as comfortable a position as was possible, to alleviate the haemorrhoid pains, and had to get up again for another DTAAD wee-wee!
I think I watched some more of the DVD in between many dropping-off to sleep periods, varying from a minute to ten or so.
A very concerned and truly wee’d off Nottingham pensioner finally drifted into a demented dream-filled kip! Tsk!
recliner within a minute, gained balance without any dizzies or shakes, and I made my to the kitchen to do the Health Checks without any toe-stubbing or knocking into or anything over! The sphygmomanometer readings varied again, with the temperature at 35.1°. 
Then I spotted that I had left the hot water tap (faucet) running, stone cold now! I silently swore at myself and ground my teeth (and I don’t have many of them left, hehe!), I went into Self-Contempt-Defcon-Three status! 
Where in their office I found Hip-Hop-Dance-Instructor and Oberstess Warden Julie, and Highland Dancing Teacher and Scharführeress Warden Deana, busy working away, conscientiously. 
lungs? Hehehe! I exchanged a few words with the gals and withdrew to a safe distance.
Mary was coming the opposite way, and we stopped for a natter. Cyndy passed by and had a few words with Mary, then they both abandoned me. Well, you can’t blame them! Hehehe! 
I saw this labrador dog through the unwanted light and view-blocking kitchen window, near the tree copse. He or she was sniffing around wagging the tail at such speed and vigour. I didn’t see anyone with him/her, it was just that I was so happy to see the canine so contented, so I took this photograph of the joyful moment. It was a fair way off, but it came out alrightish I think. Mind you, it might have been a different type of dog, now I look closely at the print.
I got the camera and trotted down and outside to await their arrival. I caught them both on camera as they walked towards me. 
I lay there in the second-hand £300 ci1968 rickety recliner for a couple of minutes contemplatively mulling things over. As usual, there were no answers found, no targets or aims set, no solutions presented themselves, and a distinct lack of interest suddenly came over me. I conveniently stored away from reality the emotional fears and wants in the ‘I can’t cope with this’ storage section at the back of the brain, praying they would not return later to chafe, rankle, necrotise, and torment me. (Knowing full well that they would!) By gum, I’d woken in a right emotionally unbalanced state, this morning! Still, after having guiltlessly sent the ruminations and fears to Coventry, I actually felt a little easier, with less theorisationing and practical mental work being needed to fret over! 
A fairly good evacuation. Washed up and had a perusal of the legs with the aid of the camera.
I got the Health Checks sorted out. With the sphygmomanometer needing three tries to get it to work.
I don’t know why, but the brain started thinking of comestible eatables. Whatever I end up having for my nosh, later on, it will include the Nayoora Sicilian Marina tomatoes. 
It was 06:25hrs, already.
I spoke with Pole dancer, Leutnant Untersturmführeress Warden, and perimeter Gua
I said my farewells and set off, on the hobble to Carrington’s Pharmacy. With a feeling of oblectation; at the thought of at last getting the sock-glide and hosiery at long last! 
struggle, after this. Tsk! 
I went to the bus stop, already too late to get any benefit from going to the Winwood Social hour, not enough in time. 
narked, resentful, aggrieved, piqued and irritated with things for many a year! And I felt a touch guilty about it.
was full or not, and that was why he didn’t pull in. Oddly, this did not bother me? 
stop, back to the flats. 
I got to the top of Winchester Street, to Chestnut Grove, and took this photograph of the Winwood Heights in all its glory.
I made some sarnies and chips for the nosh. 
23:54hrs. I woke up reluctantly. A throbbing headache and Shaking Shaun and Dizzy Dennis toying with me, all at the same time. I lay there, feeling a tad dispirited and waited until things calmed down. Shaking Shaun let go of my body first. Dizzy Dennis later, but the headache remained, throbbing away. I remembered I have the food delivery coming twixt 06:00 > 00:700hrs. No blood test this week. I felt there was something else to be aware of, but could not pinpoint it. Eventually, the need for the Porcelain Throne arrived. I manipulated my grossly over-stomached body free of the £300 second-hand, ci1968 rickety recliner, and off to the wet room. 
The legs and feet felt much improved this morning, (not the knees, they were Arthur Itis affected in the extreme) as I walked far easier than of late. The evacuation went well, despite it being of the mini-rugby ball style. Made a nice change that did, Hehe! 
resting it to get the sock on – got it on and fell backward hitting the back of my head on the door! That did the headache a lot of good! Oy Vey, I’ll be glad when the sock glide becomes available for me to collect from the surgery. But when that is likely to be, is anyone’s guess!
07:50hrs now. The Ocado order is due between 07:00>08:00hrs. 
I got my clothes off and the glorious old slippers on. Then the computer on to update this blog. (You watch it, someone will call on or ring me now!) 
Got the nosh eaten up. 
a meg-mega, slow trickling wee-wee! And realised I had to rise, get some clothing on, and get ready for the food delivery.
£5! Cor blimey! Love a duck! 
Where I discovered that the wee-wee mode had changed to that of being an SSPWW (Short-Sharp-Painful-Wee-wee). By the time I had readjusted things ready to take the EGPWWB off to be cleansed and sanitised, I needed another further session! The stinging and tingling was a lot worse this morning. And yet, the legs felt and looked like most of the fluid retention had gone? I hobbled to the kitchen with the bucket and antisepticated it, in readiness for what was obviously going to be further heavy use later on.
Feeling right depressed and weary now, not really knowing why, apart fro, persistent Dizzy Dennis, maybe. 
I got the kettle on and did the Health Checks.
Got the ablutions sorted out, bins to the rubbish chute. Took a recycling bag down on the way out, dropped it at the caretaker’s door. 
pottery to be stolen from location, and residents porta-cabin. Where I had a natter with some residents, Doreen, May, Kath and Roy amongst them. Not many laughs this morning, mostly listened to complains and moans.
I called into the Sherrington Park Medical Practice and asked for some urine sample bottles, which the lady handed to me. Thanked them and off out to walk down to the Lidl store first, then to pick up the Sock-Glide and socks from the chemist. I bought some Rosti sticks, lemon yoghourt, Melton pork pie and battered sliced potatoes, and paid at the self-serve tills, then out and to the chemist. 
I thanked the receptionist. And decided to walk back to Carrington, partly to get some of the albeit cool, sunshine on my body, and allow me to rid my mind of the twisted thoughts within, and reclaim some form of belief, purpose, faith and confidence. 
wees were bothering me, so all was not a disaster! 
So low were my spirits. I should have known better than to even think that anything might go right for me. 
life of Woe has and will always be frustrating, annoying, failing, defeating, harassing, intruded upon, fraught, perturbing and plagued with my inadequateness and a dearth of any success! 
banged the bruise on my left arm, on the telegraph pole! 
When I got into Sherwood, the sky and clouds looked so beautiful, although it was not very warm with it. 
I was so pleased to see that the Nottingham City Council have now arranged for some meaningful efforts at population control to be activated in Sherwood at last! 
I limped on, and waited at the bottom of Winchester Hill, for the L9 bus.
When we got back to the flats, I joined a little ganglet of about six Woodthorpeonians, on the walk back to the block. They soon left me trailing. 
Buttered Polish sliced sourdough bread tomato sarnies, ham hock and some of the potato Rosti sticks. And very nice too! Mind you, I was feeling hungry! I ate everything up. A taste rating of 9.3/10 for this effort. 
The long evacuation went well; I read some of the Victoria Wood biography. But I clouted my head on the corner of the cabinet as I bent down to retrieve the book I’d dropped! Huh! 
Shit! I panicked a bit, no, a lot. After turning off and on a few times, it was apparent that it was not due to the Virgin going slow? Cannot be repaired! I tried on Google, but the link on there had lost all the contacts, and it was for my other old email account anyway, still no access to the current Email!
Oh, dearie me, I do feel a clot!
After another Porcelain Throne visitation. 
With all the hassle and palaver with things this morning, I hadn’t really noticed, or maybe they had just started, but the legs were extremely itchy around the Arthur Itis kees and shins. They felt like something was crawling under the skin? 
The landline light flashed. It was Sister Jane a calling. She’s doing her best to catch me up on medical appointments I think. At last, she is close to seeing someone about her mangled foot and big toe! Poor gal sounds a bit wary of not having an anaesthetic for the job, she is worried methinks. I hope all goes well for her, and she can get rid of her warpedness. Hehehe! I hope this photo of long lost and much missed Tabsie can cheer her up. 
I got a very early nosh sorted out. 
Into the kitchen, and almost cried when I saw how damaged and sad the poor tree copse looked. The wind damage had felled some trees, and many branches were hanging off of the trunks. 
Off to the kitchen with the EGPWWB to do the usual morning MOT on the bucket. Cleansed, dried and disinfected.
Took the medications, and then had to visit the Porcelain Throne. 
Which was a bit ridiculous. The evacuations, although a tad messy, went alright, I found myself waiting for the wee-wee that followed to finish… I waited and waited… I got the Victoria Wood biography and read an entire chapter before the end of the wee-wee arrived! I imagine I will be having another day indoors! 
Then I went to get the medical dosage pots sorted out. 
During the next three hours of my graphicationalisationing, I only needed three LSPDOWWs, they are getting more painful to pass now.
I had the last of the vegetarian chilli ready meals, with black beans added to calm the hotness down. Baked a sourdough baguette to soak up the sauce, and tucked into it with a certain amount of relishingosity! 
23:25hrs. I woke with a fleeting flash of fleek memories of the dream I had been enjoying so much. The mind lost concentration for a moment, while the Sock-Glide equipment took over for a few seconds, and I looked forward to getting the metal frame and socks from the Chemist next week. Try as I might, I could get back in touch with the dreams memories after that! It didn’t half nark me. Proper irked I was!
I got my balance and checked the legs. I could hardly see any signs of the leg ulcer (That I have waited eight weeks for the appointment, and that day is today, Grumph”). 
I laid out the tube, big shoes, paperwork all together in the hope that I would not forget to take them with me to the Health Centre. 
Posted that one off to WordPress. Went on the WP reader page. Then on Facebook to catch up with the TFZers and post some pictures to the albums.
A letter was found in the hallway. ‘Electrical contractor will need access to the flat to secure cables to the heater from skirting boards, if necessary.’ The timing was given as, ‘Either Monday 25th, Tuesday 26th, or Wednesday 27th March!’
I enjoyed a chinwag or two with my fellow alcoholic tenants in attendance. Hehe! We had a few laughs and exchanged insults.
stops, before I got off at the end of Gregory Boulevard. I had to walk back to the pelican lights, where I was nearly knocked over in the students rush to get to the college.
My sad indulging in the wool-gathering session came to an abrupt end when I noticed this Herbert of a Nottinghamiam Pedal Cyclist coming toward me, while he was texting on his phone! This annoyed me, he wasn’t even looking ahead! Although he did stop once or twice. 
dear, had I left it at the flat? I decided to have another search when I arrive at the Health Centre, which was only about five minutes away. Well, for a fit youngster, it took me ten minutes to get there, at hobbling-speed. Tsk! The feet were painful again. 
I have to collect the Sock-Donner from the chemist, along with the socks. This picture is the nearest I could find on the web, that was anything like the one they showed me how to use, which I will be getting. The layout workings are similar. The NHS one had thicker stronger square tubular tubing, is bright green and a lot stronger and durable looking to me. It has a snap-on grabber at the back, to trap the sock tops once you have inserted them in the grid. It is much larger too so there may be less bending down to use the NHS one? You can use it from seated. That’ll be betterer. Could be fun lifting the leg up, but far less hassle than what I have now! Carrying it home from the chemists should be fun, especially on the buses. 
I did ring my neighbour’s door, to hand her the strawberries. I hope she likes them. 
tomatoes as filling. Chips and chicken mini-sausages. 
I thought I could hear the sounds of a police helicopter. 
Having taken the pills and medicines, I spotted a little white smoke on the distance. It seemed to be coming from near the Hadyn Road/Hucknall Road junction area.