The Nottingham Lads True Tales of Woe

Newly Identified Medical Sydromes

/ Inchie / 9 Comments

Newly Identified Syndromes

Named Disease: HAJ (Had-a-job) Syndrome

aa03MSSymptoms: Being made redundant through no fault of your own, suicidal feelings, lack of food, and the disappearance of respect.

Most at Risk: The proletariat, anyone not related to a banker or a friend of a Politician, the unemployed, the millions of immigrants both legal and otherwise, the impecunious, the uneducated youths of today, and the educated youths of today without rich family connections.

Area’s most affected: The North – Midlands.

Named Disease: Spooninthegobatbirthness Syndrome

Osb07Symptoms: A snottiness and uncaring attitude develops that cannot be countered. The bank balance and overseas investment accounts increase exponentially.

Most at Risk: Royalty, Aristocracy, Politicians, Footballers, and the Right Honourable George Osborne MP (Conservative)

Area’s most affected: The rich 10% of the population.

Named Disease: A.A.D.(Alcoholic Addiction Dysrhythmia) Syndrome

aa03MS2Symptoms: Finding you have not got any alcoholic addictions, and the concern and worry you get about being so different to everyone else. A.A.D. syndrome is often claimed by alcoholics and West Ham fans for their failure.

Most at Risk: Those under the age of eight, and more mature liars.

Area’s most affected: Nursery schools, MOT stations, 

Named Disease: Monetary Cystitis (M.C.) Syndrome

aa03MS3Symptoms: It is extremely painful, nigh on impossible for you to repay money owed by you, forcing the sufferer to short change and overcharge whenever possible. Also builds an inbred hatred of Bank Managers, Loan companies and Old Age Pensioners.

Most at Risk: Pensioners, Politicians, Dentists, Lawyers, Bankers, Haliburton, George Osborne, Claret Appreciation Group members and Taxi Drivers.

Area’s most affected: Nationwide.

Named Disease: Hope Alopecia  (H.A.) Syndrome

aa03MS4Symptoms: A sudden realisation that all hope is lost, other than for the War Mongers, Politicians, bankers, Car Mechanics, David Cameron, Nigel Farage, Haliburton and other nepotistic clans.

One person definitely not suffering from this Syndrome is UKIP’s Nigel Farage. Campaigning in a seat where Labour “should weigh the vote”, Mr Farage said that his party is “taking big numbers” of Labour supporters making Thursday’s result “very very tight”. And with young and older voters both warming to his message on immigration and borders control, Mr Farage revealed that he had new evidence that the Labour vote across the country is collapsing because of the Corbyn effect. He produced polling evidence by former Labour leader Ed Miliband’s ex-adviser Ian Warren which he said showed 50 per cent of those who voted Labour in the humiliating general election defeat in May will desert the party. Humph!

Most at Risk: Everyone not connected with the above.

Area’s most affected: Anywhere with any businesses still owned and ran by English management, so as you can tell, these are scarce.

Named Disease: Compassion Deficiency Anaemia (C.D.A.) Syndrome

aa03MS5Symptoms: You couldn’t give a toss about anyone else.

Most at Risk: Most predominant in Parliament, and Lawyers offices, although likely to be found anywhere.

Area’s most affected: Virtually throughout the world.

Named Disease: Cacospysy Syndrome (C.S.)

aa03MS6Symptoms:  Irregular pulse, concern and worry that the government will find your stash of undeclared earnings from illegal practices of varying secretly ran companies. Panic attacks at Government Budget announcement time.

Most at Risk: The poor and the dodgy types.

Area’s most affected: All of the UK and FIFA representatives.

Named Disease: E.D.D. Early Decrepitude disease

aa03MS7Symptoms: Sudden realisation that the poor are getting poorer, and the Rich are getting richer, and you are one of the poorer. Urges to dress up in fancy dress and join WordPress might affect them. Memory loss and bodily function controls are common amongst these syndrome sufferers.

Most at Risk: Those who are poor and getting poorer.

Area’s most affected: Worldwide: In the event that you should feel or find any of the above symptoms coming on, do not consult your Doctor who will be too rich to be bothered to understand your frustrations and problems. In the event of your becoming disinterested in money and valuable items, Danny Soz (19¾) can be contacted for help. You could consider suicide, alcoholism, hibernation, or becoming a Politician. But best not to worry… your Doomed. Most E.E.D. sufferers end up not knowing the difference between the syndromes anyway, then read up on them and forget they did.

Inchcock Today Mon 30 Nov 15: Wet rain, GP, Clinic, Dizzy spells and bleeding… Tsk!

/ Inchie / 2 Comments

Monday 30th November 2015

Woke at 0345 hrs in need of the WC, Little Inchy not bleeding so bad this morning. Horrible night spent more of it awake than kipping. Tsk!

The rain had stopped at last, and the temperature was 55ºf.

Made a cuppa and took me medications, stomach rumbling again, but I put that down to me nibbling all day yesterday and not having a nosh.

Put me INR dosage card in me coat pocket so as not to forget it later when I go for me Warfarin level blood test.

Put me Lumix camera on charge, then took me morning medications, put me midday ones in me bag.

01W01Misty and raining heavily now – and I’ve got to walk to the GP surgery later, then go to the clinic to have me bumps and lumps checked.

Still, despite every thing I found missen singing again in the bath… Adam Faith and Billy Fury songs mostly, with the odd Rick Nelson and Nat King Cole thrown in.

Two nosh deliveries coming today. Morrison’s any-time now, then Asda tonight.

FooeyGot an email from Sister Jane in reply to mine, Fooey is not doing very well and she is expecting the worst. Poor old Fooey, made me so sad. I asked if I could go up to see them, no reply yet.

Made a start on the laptop and finished yesterdays diary off. Emails, messages and started this one-off.

No Morrison’s by 0845 hrs so I looked at me diary. It’s tomorrow when it comes not today. Tsk!

Out and caught the L8 bus into Sherwood as it was still belting down with rain and a bit windy with it. Dropped of at the bottom of the hill and walked up Mansfield Road and down into Carrington to the GP surgery.

The Obergrupperführer nurse was on duty today. But she doesn’t scare me like… WPlie

Had me test done and left feeling guilty after receiving a telling off about me weight, eating Brassica and going out in the rain?

Out and over the road and caught bus to the clinic (Well soaked again) – in and out in minutes today. Two doctors were off sick and I got another appointment.

P1020547Caught the bus into Mansfield just for the sake of it. Got some of me crossword book done e route.

Rained all the way and got even heavier when I got into Mansfield bus station.

Through the puddles under the subway and out into the shopping centre.

So many leaks coming from the roof I dare not get me camera out in the subway.

Called into B&Q to see if they had any bargains but no such luck, then I wandered up to another store and got some bread and tinned green beans.

P1020548Came out and took this rather sad photograph with the rain, closed down premises and lack of shoppers in the Mansfield City Centre.

 Had a whopping dizzy spell as I went down the steps onto the road.

Stood around holding onto the railings for what seemed like ages for it to abate, probably only a few minutes though. Decided to make me way back to Sherwood and the flat.

Walking to the bus-station in the rain is a blank in me memory?

Got the bus (Bless me free pensioners bus-pass) and felt a lot better.

P1020546Dropped off in Sherwood and an L8 came within minutes and lifted me up the hill to the flats.

Got in and WC’d (Relief!), hung me clobber up to dry out.

Made a cuppa and took me midday medications a little late but still.

The Asda delivery arrived with the usual substitutions on it.

P1020549Got me nosh ready, put me potatoes to bake in the oven, gave the 40 minutes then added the Cottage pie with sweet potatoes for 20 minutes, then popped me last Frikadellen in the oven with the others for ten minutes. The sweet potato-shepherds pie could have done with a bit more time, but I was so hungry I ate everything anyway. Added me carrots and peas from the saucepan, buttered, salted and peppered the baked spuds, added a sprinkling of vinegar and had a lemon yoghurt afterwards.

Drifted off to kip – woke up needing the WC urgently and had another dizzy.

Not a bad one, but it bothered me a bit having two so close together, not normal that.

Washed the pots up and titivated the kitchen but still felt tired, sat down to watch the TV and did so… in between dozens of dozing offs! No idea what I watched now, or rather tried to watch.

Kept waking up distorted and aching in places I didn’t know I had? Hehe!

Inchcock Today Sun 29 Nov 15: Ostentatiousness from the seagulls?

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Sunday 29th November 2015

Woke at 0310 hrs in need of the WC.

Cannot recall any dreams, ‘Little Inchy’ bleeding needed attention again, passed wind and nearly choked missen! Phwoar!

Laptop on to finish yesterdays diary off.

Kettle on and made a cuppa and took me medications.

After hours on the laptop I got a bath and freshened up.

P1020545Getting light properly now and the rain and wind is a-blowing!

Felt oddly tired and fell asleep when I sat down to have a cuppa.

Woke up hours later confused as to what day it was, time it was and where I was – for some reason I thought I should have been on a bus?

The stomach began churning once again, and I was nibbling nearly all the day… worms?

Listless a had a read of me book.

Went to make a cuppa and to me amazement outside the kitchen window were several seagulls. They were swooping at the window, I think one to two of them clouted the glass with their beaks?

Went to get me camera but they had gone when I returned. Alfred Hitchcock has nothing on this place! Haha!

Did very little of worth or value today at all – moped, read, watched TV… idle sod!

Took me medications and spent hours trying to get off to sleep.

Hey-ho…

Inchcock today Sat 28 Nov 15: Some sorting done at last

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P1020538

The Moon refusing to go away this morning…

Saturday 28th November 2015

Woke at 0400 hrs, WC’d, checked the temperature, a decent 57ºf this morning, made a cuppa and took me medications. Felt tired still for some reason, old age I suppose?

I’d been dreaming but could not define exactly what took place just knew it was related to running and chasing again.

Laptop on started this tosh off.

Facebooked a bit, then WC’d, made another cuppa and tripped up and went over in the bedroom when looking fer me clean bath towels. Luckily I fell on a pile of bags with clothes in that are waiting to be sorted – and made no noise to disturb me neighbour either, with the soft slow-motion landing I had. No injuries lumps bumps or cuts… apart from feeling a fool! Hehe!

Got a wash and shave and into me togs.

Out to catch the L9 into Arnold and get some Anya potatoes ’cause the craving for em came back.

Great chin-wag with the other residents waiting for the bus.

P1020539Dropped off at Sainsburys petrol station and waddled in and got two bags of me spuds – not very buy for a Saturday and I was out in time to catch the next bus back to the flats. Bad news, they have gone up to £1.50 a small bag.

WC’d then got me potatoes on the boil slowly.

Got me things ready and did some laundry to catch up on the pile I have still to do – having forgotten to take one of the bags with me last Tuesday. Tsk!

Out to the lifts and they were out of order, both of them.

P1020541    P1020542

So I popped down the twelve flights (24 really, two for each floor) of stairs and into the lobby on me way to the laundry room… guess what? The Fire Brigade were here again – this time in numbers and talking to someone in the lobby and looking unhappy about whatever it was they were doing. I assume they have turned off the lifts for some reason. Possibly a follow-up from the activation yesterday?

P1020469None of the other tenants heard any alarms?

Cleaned the machine and got me washing into it.

Then back up the stairs to the flat, definitely harder than coming down from the flats. Hehe!

P1020540Checked me spuds doing nicely. Then I put on another pan with the rest of them in it, and me carrots in another to warm them up later.

Cleaned the kitchen floor and it was time to go down the 24 flights of steps to the laundry room and get me togs into the drier.

Brigade chaps still milling about.

Togs into drier and back up the stairs to check on me spuds.

Somehow I’d turned off the rings when I put the new saucepan on? It’s not easy being a pillock yer know!

One more down to the laundry room with me bag to put the togs in. I was surprised at how well I coped with the stairs, and Arthur Itis was good about it.

Took me togs out and folded them – I acquired an odd sock in the process.

My next door flat lady arrived as I was leaving the lobby, now free of personages and the fire engine had gone from outside.

As we got the now working once again lift up to the flat she told me she had suffered her computer being hacked by someone demanding money not to destroy all her files!

She had taken it to a computer shop and they told her they can remove it in time, the git said she now has 2 days to pay-up. I hope the shop bloke was right about sorting it for her.

P1020544Into the flat and checked me spuds, done nicely, turned off the heat and left the lids on for later.

Really enjoyed me nosh tonight. Baby carrots, pickled beetroot and egg, sausages, Anya potatoes and chestnuts. Rated this one 9.54/10.

Sorted some togs out I’ll not need – owing to the shrinking… or right, owing to me getting fatter! Taking them to the Nottingham Hospice Charity shop next week. Might drop them off on me way to the GP on Monday.

Had a look on Facebook for a bit, then decided to settle and watch a DVD – what a decision that was, it took me so long to decide which to watch it was dark! Ended up watching some episodes of Sherlock Holmes from the 1930’s.

Getting to sleep took ages and ages. Then kept waking up regularly. Tsk!

Inchcock Today Fri 27 Nov 15: Help arriving today – no, I take that back…

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Friday 27th November 2015

Woke at 0245 hrs, I’d been dreaming and waking up all night – the dreams were all of the same theme but totally different situations: I was searching for something in each dream but someone or thing was stopping me getting to where I wanted to search… an undertaker who looked like Spike Milligan was hiding papers as I tried to search on office, then he became a judge wearing a helmet and sentenced me to join the Conservative party as chauffeur to one of the MPs?  That was in the last dream I think. Bits from earlier ones all seemed to have me searching on rooftops again?

I could feel the lower regions damp, so went to the bathroom to clean up ‘Little Inchy’ again and have a session on the porcelain. More washing to do again now too!

I came out of the bathroom, put the kettle on and thought I could hear music? Odd that I thought at 0330 in the morning?

P1020529Went to the door tracing the music, P1020530opened the door to find it was the fireP1020532 alarm belting merrily away.

I went into the kitchen opened the window and awaited the arrival of the brigade to get a photo of them.

The first tender arrived. The lads got out casually and wondered into the foyer to check the fire-panel I assume.

One of the officers even looked up to see if he could see any flames – or he thought I was being cheeky pointing me camera at him? Hehe! Probably the second reason, cause none of them called at the flat to check.

The second tender arrives with great haste.

The third didn’t come near enough for me to get a photo of it, as it turned around behind the garages and departed whence it came.

Bit of excitement to start the day, P1020533bonkers dreams, fire brigade now, what will be the third thing?

Me tea had gone cold so I made another.

‘Little Inchy’ was sore so after they had left I called in the bathroom to check on me pads I’d put on Inchy and found I’d left the hot tap running in the sink! So, no hot water or bath today for me! Huh!

Took me medications and got the laptop on to finish yesterdays diary off.

The ulcer was a bit easier this morning, well a lot easier actually, Anne Gyna calm, reflux valve too, the blister on me finger from burning it taking out me nosh from the oven yesterday had come up and burst nicely, the toothache has lessened, Arthur Itis was lingering but not too bad, no dizzies at all and the temperature in the kitchen was up to 60ºf. Things looked good, a bit worrying this!

The tummy started rumbling a bit later, but nowhere near as bad as the last two days.

Checked me emails and comments.

biGladysGot onto some Facebooking. TFZ’s Suzieann’s birthday today, on with doing a graphic for her up there in Scotland. Took me while and the flipping Coreldraw started playing up cause I was using so much memory in creating this, but I was pleasedish with it, just hope Suzie likes it.

She’s a lovely witty gal and suffering at the moment with having her eyes treated. Hope she has a marvellous day.

Got a good bath and titivated missen and called at the Community Hut on me way to walk into Sherwood.

No one in again, so left the mail or the flats last tenant Margaret on the desk with some nibbles.

Tried ringing Steve again on the way, got an answer this time. He’s going to call round later bless him.

Walked up to the park and down onto Mansfield Road and left down into Sherwood and called at the Co-op shop see if they had any bargains and get me bread. They had some potato letters at half-price so I got a bag, along with a TV paper and me bread. Couldn’t find me co-op card – add me losing the letter from the Nottingham Building Society and I’m now waiting for the third thing to lose today. Tsk!

Came out search me pockets but could not find me Co-op card!

P1020536I noticed some residents at the bus stop so a bus must be due to catch back up to the flats.

Here they are, I showed the photo’s of the fire tenders from this morning. Two knew nothing about it, but this chap who has good hearing heard them and got up to watch.

P1020534We all had a natter, not much time as we were only going three stops – but it was all uphill.

We all got in the lift had a joke and departed.

Into the flat and to the WC – glad to see I’d not left the heater or light on or tap running! Sad innit?

Put me potato letters in the freezer. Made a cuppa and sorted some paperwork as I searched again for the NBS letter to show Steve of Age UK.

Without any luck. Tsk!

Laptop on to update this while I awaited the arrival of Steve.

Started a graphic using Corel Draw and Corel Paint for the TFZ gals.

Got missen in a pickle – Photopaint won’t close and Draw will let me close it until I exit from Photopaint? Oh ‘eck!

Ended up crossing me fingers and force-shut-down the laptop.

Steve rang later, he’s too busy to come but will call the NBS on Monday to find out about the house movement.

P1020537Had me nosh and took me evening medications.

Potato letter waffles, carrots pork pie, sausages, tomatoes and beetroot, followed my a pot of mandarins in orange jelly.

Got the DVD on the TV sorted a bit now, thanks to advice from Duncan Robertson – so watched the last two episodes of the ‘Life on Mars’.

Tried the laptop to see if it loaded alright and it did. Just hope that Coreldraw works when I next use it.

WC’d, then decided I’d watch some TV… the usual story, spent 10 minutes picking out what to watch and fell asleep within five minutes of putting on the set. The anaesthetic qualities of TV programmes are much underrated ain’t they?

Inchcock Today Thu 26 Nov 15: Things gerring a bit better…?

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Thursday 26th November 2015

P1020527

No snow, no ice, no rain as the day lit up

Woke at 0600 hrs, still feeling bitter about FraserBrown (The amateur mock-Solicitors) mucking me about.

WC’d, made a cuppa and took me medications, remembering to take the extra Warfarin. Then realised I’d already taken them last night – a good Whoopsidangleplop start to the day!

Took ages finishing yesterdays dairy off, the ages on Facebook catching up.

Several cups of tea later, I started this one off, then got missen ready to go to the Clinic – bath have etc.

Want to go feed the ducks today if I can get ready in time and the clinic visit is not too long like.

So I’ll gerrof and prepare missen then.

TTFN.

All ready, bus-pass, camera, clinic cards, wrapped up warm, stomach settling and off I go.

P1020520Off on the L9 into town.

Nottingham pavement cyclists were rampant today.

I wondered down into the City Centre and wondered around for a bit taking photographs as I waited for the time arriving to nip up to the clinic.

P1020523The Christmas stalls were attracting the attention of the local ladies.

This stall selling well overpriced ladies accoutrements seemed popular.

I wanted to tell the girls that they could get the same stuff they were selling for £5 and £8 from the Pound Shop P1020522around the corner.

The German food stall was busy preparing the food on a giant rotating dish in the middle of the stall. I must say it smelt lovely.

If I win the lottery later I might be able to afford to buy some of there meats.

P1020525I must be feeling a bit better methinks, cause when I saw the sign hanging up on the stall that said ‘Olde English sausages – the noticed the Robirch Sausages bag they had just emptied onto the grill, I  felt like telling them that Robirch sausages are Irish made, not English, mind you they are great tasting though.

I wandered up to the clinic and noticed more Nottingham Pavement Cyclists buzzing through the crowds and scaring some of the old folk. Swine!

I got there and handed me letter and card to the receptionist. She read them, frowned and asked me why I was attending today and not in January as is me usual appointment time?

“Because the letter you sent me” I says… “Told me to come today at 1245hrs!”

She glanced down at he paperwork again, tutted and said nothing other than she pointed to the benches and commanded me to take a seat. Which I did.

As I waited I thought how lucky she was – if she was to lose her job through being thick, arrogant and uncaring, she’d walk into a job with FraserBrown pretend solicitors, fit in perfectly she would! Hehehe! Bitter still, Me?

A lady with a wonderful smile called me into the treatment room and was most helpful and understanding. (She wouldn’t stand a chance of getting  job with FraserBrown We-hate-Clients Solicitors at all)

She even explained why they cannot replace me inner plastic bit that went discoloured. She said it so nicely I was happy they hadn’t done it just for the opportunity to talk to her.

As I left someone else was getting an earful from the receptionist, who I think noticed me smiling at this? Oh dear, I hope she’s not on duty in January, she might remember me.

P1020526Another Nottingham Pavement Cyclist nearly got me as I walked through town on me way to the Canal to feed me ducks.

Outside a pub on South Parade an ambulance was collecting a customer and gently getting him in the bck of the ambulance.

P1020521A police officer got in with him?

On down Wheeler Gate I plodded, more pavement cyclists but they were too quick for me to gerrum on film.

I walked through the Broad Marsh shopping centre and called in the DVD shop to have a nosey around.

They didn’t have owt to tempt me with though.

Along to the Pound Shop, where I got carried away. Found they had just two pairs of the fingerless gloves with matting on the inside left, these are great when your fingers freeze, cause they help me keep hold of whatever I was holding at the time the fingers froze… if yer follow me like. So I got them, then saw they had tinned steak so I got one of them, a pair of long socks and a stylus pen for using on me mobile.

P1020517Then poddled to the Heron Store and got some bread.

Out and across the road to the Canal bridge… where a group of youths stopped me and asked if I was local, each had a clipboard and I said “Are you?”

It could have got interesting as I noticed the sneer coe on his face and the others closed in. But the traffic lights changed then and I could not hear what he was saying o wandered off pointing to me hearing-aids. Wonder what they wanted, survey or selling summat I suppose?

P1020519Got to the bridge and it was getting late, so I thought I’d drop the bread down off the bridge to the ducks.

I was amazed that there were so few birds there today. A chap stood watching me told me they had done a cull last week, he saw them doing it.

That’s not nice.

P1020518I wandered back into town to catch me last L9 bus.

Getting busier as the day went on in town it seemed.

There are now three saxophone player street artists on the stretch of road from slab square to the mall.

I thought I’d caught one in the photo above but missed him. You can see h equipment on the floor on the left though. (Failed again!)

P1020524Plenty of traffic about as I approached the bus stop.

Got on the bus and at a later stop the chap form the 4th floor of the flats got on and we had a little natter.

Nice chap, he’s the one who usually tells me a story from his passed, but didn’t today.

Got in WC’d, put me bits away, made sure I’d got the right medications ready and laptop on to update this load of waffle.

P1020528Got me nosh ready. Frikadellen, pulled pork balls, sweet potatoes in batter, beetroot in vin & orange, baby carrots and bread thins.

Followed by a banana, mandarins in orange jelly – there was to be a pot of orange yoghurt as well, but that had gone sour when I tried it, uergh!

After much hassle getting the DVD to work on the telly – I fell asleep watching it.

Kept waking up in between weird dreams, until 0300hrs when I had to go to the WC to tend to normal functions and clean up ‘Little Inchy’ who had got excited and started to bleed all over me. More flaming washing to do again! Tsk!

Inchcock Today Wed 25 Nov 15: Huh!

/ Inchie / 4 Comments

Wednesday 25th November 2015

Woke at 0220 hrs, depressed and feeling sorry for missen over yesterdays Woes and cock-ups.

The house sale being put on hold once again is really frustrating, as twice the solicitors who have put the stop on, have informed me that all they need to progress has been received, my going down twice to talk with them and getting soaking wet in the process, and as I say being assured they have all they need now to progress – this third stoppage and their demanding a valid passport and or driving licence with photo – and my not having either – yet I explained this to the woman at reception in the offices on my last visit and she phoned someone and got a call back, then she told me if I supplied my NI number on an official document that would suffice. I had a wage slip, the last one where I got my redundancy pay and she photocopied it – I AGAIN asked her if she had everything needed to progress now, she assured me they had AGAIN.

Then getting the letter yesterday telling me everything had stalled because I had not supplied a valid passport or driving licence and must get in touch with them urgently.

Then I told Deana the flats coordinator who had called to check my health-alert wristband, and she rang them (The comically called Solicitors FraserBrown) for me and got an answer-phone. It’s very frustrating – no, bloody frustrating!

I could do with someone with a bit more umph than I, going with me for a fourth (Or is it fifth now?) time and trying to sort out once and for all what’s what here!

Now, I await an answer from Steve Age UK – not much chance of that I fear for some reason. Or the so-called solicitors getting back in touch with Deana and Deana getting in touch with me… and a plan of action designed… or summat!?!

Made a cuppa, but I’m feeling morose and bitter.

I called Steve UK no answer – left a message asking him for advice. (Fool that I am, I actually expect I might get some, but not yet…)

Laptop on finished Tuesday’s diary. Then started this off, but with little enthusiasm. I feel so depressed again now, convinced I cannot win whatever I do and am doomed to failure frustration and desperate measures. Sorry, but that is how I feel.

Desperately need progress, good news and or a bit of good fortune here if I am not going to lose it.

Steve Age UK is so busy with other clients so to speak. At least he’s helped me get out of the old place and avoid the yobs, but into all this bother with the selling of the house. Deana is trying for me, but the solicitors FraserBrown of Friar Lane Nottingham that the Nottingham Building Society engaged for me to use are just not being helpful at all, each time I tell them I have not got a valid passport or driving licence… then they assure me they have everything needed when I asked the specific question of the receptionist and am assured I get on a high, only to be brought down again with another letter like the one yesterday demanding what they have already demanded to progress with the sale, and down I go again. Help of some sort must be available, I’m not sure I can cope with so many let-downs, oh sod-it.

Now today, I have to wait in, just in case someone calls to explain the storage heaters to me. Not that I have any interest in doing anything anyway, other than involved with the damned solicitors and getting the sale of the house moving again… See, I’m back on this subject again. This is doing me health no good, although I don’t seem bothered about that, it suddenly has little value or worth to me now – I might ring someone up for real help with me mind going warped? But who?

I made another cuppa and took me medications, plenty of them around, can they be the answer? Hehe!

No point in writing when I feel like this really, I’m only going to moan and moan and feel sorry fer missen

0350 hrs now. I’ll write more when some good, or at east neutral news arrives.

Got an email from Deana the coordinator saying she asked the FraserBrown woman who is supposedly dealing me house sale if a bus pass would suffice as picture ID? She didn’t know (Fraser Brown strike again?) but would ring back.

That was yesterday, Deana told me via email reply that she’s still waiting to hear from FraserBrown so called solicitors of Friar Lane in Nottingham.

I had a good bath and shave – only one cut today, I’m getting better… well the hands are shaking less despite me being uptight.

Did a mammoth sneeze when coming out of the warm bathroom into the cold hallway – one of hearing aids I’d just put back in popped out!

Even I managed to laughed at this Whoopsiedangleplop… then again when I struggled to get up after bending down to retrieve it. Haha! Can’t have this laughing in case FraserBrown the imitation solicitors get to hear of it. (Oh I’m getting sarky now!)

Checked the thermometer in the kitchen, and it’s up to 58ºf.

For some reason I thought about the mystery disappearance of me Dixon of Dock Green DVD and had another look around for it – humph!

The mail arrived, two for Margaret the previous tenant, two for the Dynamic Nottingham Pensioner… me.

The INR Warfarin blood level results and new doses. INR is down to 1.7 and the doses increased.

The other one was from Nottingham City Homes re the visit I’d stayed indoors all day for someone who was calling today to advise me on how the storage heaters are controlled properly – to inform me that someone would be calling on Wed 9th December between 12.30 > 1630 hrs to advise me on how the storage heaters are controlled properly. Tsk! No problem I’ll have croaked out with pneumonia by then! Hehe!

Fell asleep and when I woke up an hour or two later, I decided, feeling down a bot still, I’d cheer missen up and watch me Life on Mars DVD, not watched it for years now.

I tried to get the slot thingy in the TV to accept the DVD – only two buttons on the DVD slot, pressed the in different combinations and eventually the missing Dixon of Dock Green DVD came slowly out of it!

P1020516I put it in the box with the other DVD and inserted the Mars DVD – eventually getting it going after much guesswork with the remote control thingamajig.

Got the DVD going and fell sleep again. could I get it (the DVD) out of the TV again? I imagine this is what happened with the Dixon DVD earlier?

I couldn’t see any eject button on the remote? Toshiba are tosh! Played again with the buttons, got into a TV mode I knew nowt about – turned it off and on again, more buttons tried and the DVD still remains in the slot?

Made a cuppa and then checked emails to find another one from Deana.

01W01

More professional confidence boosting message from the farcical solicitors FraserBrown Incompetents, and no apology!

They’ve certainly mucked me about, lied to me and given me many nervous and worrying sessions. I just hope that this time they do not change their minds again… The Sneezlegobbling nerve testing gits!

No wonder me ulcer’s started off again. Can I sue them do you think? No, then they would start doing their job properly if they had to defend themselves. Swines! They seem to be hanging out the sale of me house for some reason?

I put the TV into TV mode and watched some police programms… well, that was the plan. Fell asleep, doing an awful lot of this nowadays.

Woke early hours.

Must remember to increase me Warfarin tablets in the pots I’ve done up in advance tomorrow.

Hello, the stomach’s rumbling again.

Nodded off again…

Inchcock Today Tue 25 Nov 15: Laundry laughter – Then Disaster

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Tuesday 24th November 2015

Woke around 0225 hrs, sneezing started again, temp in kitchen now down to 54ºf. Despite heat coming out of the storage heater in there.

No dream memories.

To the WC and found Little Inchy sticky, sore and sorry for himself. Cleaned him up again.

With falling to sleep so early last night I’d got no end of kip in, yet still felt so tired?

Laptop on and finished yesterdays dairy off.

P1020511Sorted some more medication pots and added them to those in the drawer for later, to make room  for the new packets bottle and tubes if they are ready when I check with the chemist.

The tummy rumbled and off to the porcelain again – this time things were different, I reckon I am now 2-3lb lighter after that visit! Core… Hehe!

 Back to the laptop with me cuppa and took me medications.

BJ should be calling later to lift me to the launderette. Made sure I’d got me bus-pass for afterwards, coinage, detergent etc in me bag or pockets.

Emailed, Facebooking and then titivated the kitchen a bit.

Had a wash and shave, took the rubbish to the chute and BJ rang, he’s on his way.

Met him outside and we were off to the launderette. Mandy was in good form today.

I felt a lot better now, but BJ was not in good form. That’s sister Jane, BJ and me all all with the same complaints, although being greedy I have a few extra. Hehe!

I nipped to the chemist and the prescriptions were ready.

Got the togs in the drier and went to take a photo of BJ and Mandy and what a clot, I’d left me camera card in the laptop again! Huh!

Popped into Lidl and got Frikadellens, pork pie and a vegetarian slice – a certain sign that I’m feeling better now.

BJ ran me to Asda with him and another sure sign – that he was not well showed as he cursed signalled and generally insulted so many other drivers en route… Ah well.

Got some more bits from Asda. Some green beans, carrots,cheese rolls and Sopocka – oh… and some Fresh cream French Horns fell in me bag again… Ahem!

BJ ran me back to the flats and I made me way up the lift home – nice word that!

WC’d then opened me bag of medications and rotated the stuff into me drawer.

P1020512       P1020514

Emptied the washing into the airing cupboard and hung some up on the clothes racks and… found a bag of washing that I should have taken with the others… oh I did feel a fool!

Got a phone call from Taxi driver demanding I let him in? Obviously another wrong number dialled.

Made a cuppa and cleaned the sink, for some reason it had gotted marked badly?

Deana the coordinator for the flats called to test my health alarm – letters had been delivered, one from Fraser Brown the solicitors AGAIN they want me to go in with ID documents – I went in last week (third visit) to tell the lady on reception that I do not have a current Driving licence as it has been returned to me poor health and being unfit to drive – and I have never owned a passport. The lady rang someone in the offices and they rang back to say me National Insurance number on a legal document would suffice – I found I had me last wage packet from when I was made redundant with me – she called someone again to confirm this would be sufficient and she made a photo copy – I asked her like I did the previous week, have you got everything needed now tp proceed with the sale and she like the previous week told me they had everything to proceed with the sale now. Now it’s all stopped again!

Today I get this letter from them!?!?!?!?!? ~ Swines!

Remember the name. Fraser Brown (They were recommended by the Nottingham Building Society too!) and be warned in case you come across the nincompoops yourself!

P1020515

Nosh after burning me finger, just before dropping it on the floor!

Deana rang them but no answer, it was on answer-phone, she left a message asking them to ring her back. God I’m frustrated and pee’d off again now!

Made me nosh.

I’m getting bitter and twisted too ain’t I?

Summary of Woes today:

  • BJ unhappy unwell.
  • Ate too much.
  • Missed a bag of laundry off.
  • Lied to by my solicitors.
  • Let down over help with storage heating.
  • Nasty phone call from Taxi driver.
  • Burnt finger taking nosh out of oven.
  • Dropped nosh on floor.
  • No answer to calls to Steve Age UK.
  • Cough starting again.
  • Little Inchy bleeding again.
  • Feeling depressed and frustrated.

All in all – Pee’d off with life going wrong!

Fed-up!

Inchcock Today, Sneezing Away! Mon 23 Nov 2015

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Monday 23rd November 2015

Woke around 0315 hrs, sneezed myself awake and shivering! I didn’t think you could sneeze in yer sleep – I do now?

Feel so drained, but had to gerrup to go to the bathroom, in which I recalled some of the dreams I’d had, of course no pen in the bathroom so by the time I got, me business done and painfully cleaned up the dried clotted mess little Inchy was in, most of the recollections of the dream had gone into the ether. Remember a bit though.

Dream: I was back in the skyscraper buildings with battles going on all around as far as the eye could see, propeller driven fighter bombers similar to a De Havilland bombing, but with unknown markings, artillery fire, tanks soldiers... I don’t think I’ve had repeat dreams before, similar yes. In the bomb damaged and ravaged room I was in, I think Artillery sighting from, was part of an underground train?

Overall I was feeling a bit better this morning, not good, but better. I thought about what I had on today as I made a cuppa. Must have a bath this morning and good shave, cause last night I didn’t have either, I was so tired again.

Doctors 1000hrs for me INR Warfarin blood level tests, put the record card in me coat pocket and checked the bus-pass was there too while I thought of it. Seems an age since I’ve been out of the flat. Clinic at 1215hrs, and wondered as I now had some bread that has gone stale due to me not eating, if I could manage (weather permitting) to get to feed the ducks on the canal later? Oh, must get some bread as well.

The shakes seem to have gone, that’s another good thing this morning.

Laptop on and finished yesterdays diary.

Made another cuppa and took me medications.

Got me thick cardigan and ear-flap hat ready so as to wrap up nice and warm on me trip out. Thermal jumper, then a fleece, then me multi-pocketed sleeveless jacket, then me waterproof coat on top, and me ear-flapped hat of course.

Started this diary off and did the graphics, hard to concentrate again for some reason.

Flippin’ ‘eck, I just sneezed and I think I might have woke up me neighbours from several floors up and down! Hehe! Nearly fell out of me chair!

Started doing graphic in Coreldraw and got in a pickle with it. For some reason it had stopped me exporting and the layers moved on their own?

Gave up!

Did find a funny that appealed to me though, hope you like it folks:

01topj9c

Got the big bag and put me laundry into it ready for the morning when BJ lifts me to launderette. Did this now in case I fell asleep later when I got in like. Tsk!

Had a bath but didn’t get a good soak, too risky. Cleaned and medicated the needy parts of me anatomy: Knees, hands, rear-end and Little Inchy.

The odd sneeze, but they were getting less frequent now. Took the rubbish to the chute and got well clobbered up, ventured out to set off on me way into town and the clinic and possibly the canal if I have time to feed the ducks.

I called into the community shed and Deana and Obergruppenfurher Julie were both in. Told them about the temperature only being 55º F, and asked if someone could possibly call and explain properly how these storage heaters work for me please. Deana called someone then told me that someone was calling on Wednesday so make sure I was in all day.

01W01This meant I was a tad late setting off so I decided I’d need to catch a bus instead of walking all the way to the GP for me INR Warfarin level test.

Unfortunately, I stopped en route to take a photograph of the Allotments down the hill.

Walked on down Winchester Street hill 01W01amanaging to just miss the bus.

Plodded on up the hill.

On the way another of the infamous Nottingham Pavement Cyclists belted passed me from behind making me jump a bit.

I had me camera in me had from earlier 01W01bso managed to catch the little varmint on film.

It’s not as if it was busy with traffic was it?

If they are too scared to use the road, they shouldn’t be on a bike should they?

01W01cOver the hill and down into Carrington and into the GP surgery. Booked in and got me crossword book out.

The nurse called me and soon had me blood taken.

Out and waited for the specialist nurse to call me to have a look at me rear-end situation. After much prodding poking and digging she said things are the same and she was going to give it another few weeks before deciding if the strangulation procedure was needed. I left some nibbles for the gals when I gave them me request for some extra Codeine Phosphates.

0101acOut and aught the bus into town dropping off at Victoria Centre shopping mall, where some of the new buildings were now revealed ready to open later.

This one a new American noshery it seems, called Coast to Coast.

Possibly it’ll be another one where 0101abyou’ll need a mortgage to get a cup of coffee from?

Walked into the slab square where the Christmas stalls and rides were now trading, the Ice Rink was nearly ready to open.

As I walked down King Street a crowd of folk had gathered with what looked 0101alike stewards watching over them, then I spotted the Fire tender beyond them when I took the photo.

Transpired there had been a Fire Alarm somewhere in the Council House, where a wedding was taking place.

As I made me way to the clinic the Groom was returning to the registry 0101agoffice carrying his new bride with him!

Up to Angel Row and into the waiting area.

Presented me card and was ushered straight in? Never had that before!

This time I had new faces investigating me lesion on Little Inchy.

Much later when all the “Oohs and arghs” and hidden giggles suffered they said continue with the same cream. I told them I had none left – the tall woman said “Oh, we haven’t either… we’ll order some, it must be kept in the fridge you know this one? Told me to all back Friday when it should have arrived.

Feeling a bit sore from the prodding pulling and poking, I walked back to the slab-square. Decided the ducks will have to wait for their treats, due to me discomfort in me lower regions.

0101ad 0101ae

0101afThe stalls, food outlets and rides were all up and running now, but not many of the folk were showing much interest yet.

My knees were doing well today. Just as well, cause Little Inchy was giving me some stick after being examined in-depth. Hehe!.

I was soon on the L9 bus, timing was right for once to catch it.

Again somehow although I nodded of three or four times on the journey back, I woke in time to get off at the right bus-stop – but felt drained.

The rest of the day was wasted – nodding off, Cuppa, medications, WC, nodding off, WC, bite to eat, nodding off… you get the idea, I was kaput! Humph!

Inchcock Today Sun 22 Nov 15: Feeling

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Sunday 22nd November 2015

Head Sat

01W01Woke around 0130 hrs, having fell asleep so early last night like.

Coughing, sneezing still, but the innards were a lot better mind, more gently rumbling rather that boiling and bubbling.

Bitterly cold in the flat despite me putting the heating up. So glad I had me new flap-hat to put on.

WC’d and medicated and cleaned Little Inchy.

Laptop started, cuppa made and medication pot out for later.

By the time I’d finished yesterdays diary and graphics off (between WC visits) it was 0436hrs!

Another cuppa, took me medications and started this diary off up to here.

Checked emails. Then did some Facebooking.

I’d forgot to post yesterdays diary – Tsk! So did it.

Feeling a bit weary suddenly, another dizzy and now shivering again. Decided not to have a bath yet until I feel better, so did some graphicalisationing… but couldn’t concentrate.

Not going out today either, going to get some serious sitting down doing nothing done until I feel perkier. Huh! The sneezing starting again now. Tsk!

Horrible day, hope to feel better in’t morning. Well enough to go to the doctors. Hehehe!