Inchcock Looking Back at his Mam: In imitation rhyme


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Reminiscing about our Mam, in Rhyme

Mummy asked the midwife, to throw me in the river Trent,

Looking back, t’was my life’s first big disappointment,

She said she couldn’t afford me and still pay the rent,

From not paying the rent, she never did relent,

Sister Jane, to live with a rich relative, was sent,

Older brother Pete, joined the army to escape the torment!

She also ran away, absconded for years, yes, off she went!

– – – – – – –

I can’t say she was a good Mother or wife nor,

She spent most of her time on the run from the law,

She left Dad and me feeling very sore,

She wanted Bingo, betting, money, more and more,

She’d get it anyway, that was for sure!

– – – – – – –

The police caught her, and off to court she went,

For her crimes of conning folk and not paying her rent,

For character references, she forced an adjournment,

Her victim’s character references avoided her immurement,

Released on probation, they got her a new flat, paying her rent,

Her utility bills were paid too, they made them all obsolescent,

Even those who never got back the money to her they had lent,

Threw a celebration party for her, ignoring her criminal intent,

– – – – – – –

Despite all this, the woman was original in her day,

A con-artist of perfection, I really have to say,

Despite her nicking my stuff and her running away,

She could con anyone instantly without hesitation or delay,

She’d give you her last sixpence or chocolate from her Milk Tray,

Although the tanner and choccy came from one of her prey,

She was a crook but unique, I’d have wanted her no other way!

– – – – – – –

When I snuff it or die as it were,

Once again I’ll hopefully see her,

I anticipate my emotions will stir,

What to me would be the clincher,

Is what would I have on me for her to pincher!

See You in a while Mam XXX

Inchcock Today Sat 23 April 2016: Coming out of my torpidity at last

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23 April 1878

On this day in 1878, The Victorians eased the rules for those convicted and sentenced to Hard Labour within the penal system of England.

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Saturday 23 April 2016

I awoke after an hour and a half of sleep but felt so much better than yesterday, when the sudden attack of lethargy and torpidness hit me. The body showed no signs of complaints when I visited the throne in the bathroom, even Heam Aroid and Little Inchy were showing no signs of bleeding!

05Got the kettle on and loved the view through the kitchen window.

The Reflux Valve started sticking open and giving me continuous belching to the point of pain for ages. Most annoying.

Then made a brew and took the morning medications, then got the laptop going, but the internet indicated that it was unavailable! Luckily it came on again, but it is very slow. Virgin Media my Arse, that Branson is a fibber about how good it is!

Back to the porcelain, still no bleeding I’m glad to say! The hiccuping and belching is getting even more vicious now, Humph!

Did some WordPressing then I checked the incoming Emails.

I started the ablutionisationing, and got myself and the things needed for a trip on the bus into the City Centre, to try and get some photographs of the St Georges day celebrations. Took the rubbish bags to the chute, on way down.

The first bus at the flats was not due until 1036hrs, so I walked up and through the park and caught a bus to town in Sherwood. The hiccups and belches stated again, pied by a bit pf sneezing? Tsk!

04Dropped off the bus at the Victoria shopping centre (Mall).

Went into Tesco and spent some money on fodder, got a carrot, a parsnip, two lamb hotpots, a white and red onion, a turnip, Sopocka pork loin, tin of beans and three packs of Bread thins to go in the freezer for use later in the week.

02I wandered up towards Derby Road and took a photo of the Theatre Royal over the road.

It shows the incredible sky/cloud formations and the usual Nottingham shoplifters and benefit claimants crossing the road against the traffic lights once again. Hehehe!

Not many folks out and about yet, perhaps they have to clear their hangovers first?

Of all the shops I passed, only the shops with any customers were the Payday Loan shop, The Money Shop, Everyday Loans and Quick Loans shop.

Sad really.

I turned down towards the Slab Square and the Council House.

Some celebrants were getting a few things

07  01

08together for the parade later, and the Council House was displaying St Georges flag across the columns in front.

Very few people about here either, I was puzzled a bit.

Many barricades and fencing about, though. Ready for the parade when it starts.,

I was a little too early methinks.

So I hobbled down to have a look in the Marks & Spencer food hall.

1006I slipped the birds some seed.

there was a different Big Issue seller outside the M&S entrance door to the escalators down to their food hall.

I gave him a £2 coin and thought he was going to have a heart attack. He smiled and spoke, but all I could do back was grin in return as I could not understand a word he was saying. Must be a new incomer. But I was glad I cheered him up a bit.

They had some just baked and sliced Farmhouse loaves, so I treat myself to one, along with some plain yoghourts and fresh mushrooms that looked nice and clean.

As I came out and walked through the Slab Square, some of the display team were getting ready and trying out their uniforms and helmets.

My feet were aching badly, so I decided not to wait for the parade after all.

I’d go back and take some painkillers instead.

05The bus was no due for a good while, so I circled the City block passing through Clumber Street.

I can’t remember there being so few shoplifters… I mean Nottinghamians around on this street before?

I wandered back up slowly towards the bus stop, taking a photo of some jewellery to post for the TFZ gals on Boat22 01the Facebook site.

Later, I doctored it adding the prices converted in USD$, Canadian $, Australian $ and Japanese Yen.

Just for a laugh and comparison to the British pound prices like.

I’ve no idea what the thing on the left at £389 is, a bracelet of some sort I assume.

Caught the bus and was soon back at the flat, but it could easily have been so different, I fell asleep on the bus and amazingly woke up just as it approached the apartments. Phew!

SatGot in and put the fodder away.

Got my shoes off, made a cuppa and took the medications with an extra painkiller.

I transferred the vegetables from the Crock-Pot to the saucepan and added some mushrooms to the mix, then put the beef slices into the oven, cleaned the Crock-pot and updated this while it cooked.

P1070023It came out alright.

In fact, I had to rate this one as a most impressive 9.33/10.

The Farmhouse sliced bread was lovely and flavoursome, but I fear the tummy may object later as it was so soft.

Took the medications and back on the laptop. The Virgin internet was running a bit jumpy and slow again.

P1070025I updated this and then closed it down and put on a TV DVD called Unforgotten. It starred Nicola Walker and Sanjeev Bhaskar.

I couldn’t remember buying this at all, but it (The disc and box) were wrapped in film and looked new?

I watched to episodes and was fascinated with the plot, despite my never having seen or hearing of the series before.

Cleverly written, and it had subtitles on it, which helped.

I then put on channel 24 on Freeview, ITV4, to watch one of my favourite movies, Space Cowboys. Unfortunately, I flaked out during the second batch of commercial adverts.

Tsk!