INCHIE: Friday 7th April 2023

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I fear for most of the day today, I was here, but my mind was far away. I started that-many plans, jobs and needs, but maybe got 10% of them done.
In fact, I lost the plots more often than I retained them. I went way off-track. Let things slip, failed to remember to do things, to think anything out. I lost consciousness in a way and awareness of activities and plots planned and needed. But, do you know, I fretted and got hot under the collar far less than usual!
Right up until around 20:00hrs, and all the worries, fears, shame, self-hatred returned. It was like mental torture, and the Thought-Storms kicked off and stayed with me.
I was aware of the problems all the same, but just didn’t care? If I could buy a drug to put me back into that mode, I would. It was like a new lease on life. I suppose/imagine that Dementia Doreen played a hand in this, but for once, I didn’t mind.
A shame it came to an end, but unfortunately, it’s left me with memory blanks over the last eleven hours. I wonder if Cannabis might help me get that wonderful part-day relief from worry back?
Hey-Ho! This is the best I can give you…
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A terrible night, almost sleepless, yet again. 04:00hrs: Decided to give up on sleeping and get the ablutions done early. No shower, too noisy that early for disturbing the neighbours.
On the 2nd Catheter bag emptying, I was happy to see was Rating 2:  Great!
The right ankle ulcer had somehow been hidden from view this morning when I took these shots of it?
But the fatty tissue on the feet and ankle made walking and hobbling a smidgen dodgy all through the day.
But, Although I came close a few times… I avoided any tumbles.
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Pareidoliaing here with this shot. I see lips and or a mouth in there around the ankle bone? Hehe!

Went into the kitchenette to get the kettle on for a brew of Punjana Signature Blend tea.
The moon and sky looked blue to my eyes, so ~I took a snap of it.
Mede the mug of tea as I went to get the milk from the fridge (Well, that’s where I keep it – Hehe!) I saw how the moon and sky colours had changed in about five minutes?
I tried to get a good shot of it with the craters showing, but couldn’t get it right this morning. I think I took four photos of it, and this one is the best of the selection; on one, I actually caught only half of the moon. That is due to , and my nerve-end dying . They also caught me out when I was stirring the tea in the mug. Innit gobsmacking how maybe 2fl oz of liquid that spilt form the cup manages to spread itself on your dressing gown, hate counter, and the floor, and miraculously a few drops get into your right slipper? Cleaning that up was no fun.
Ailments , & were all activated by the time I’d got the mess cleaned up and replaced the dressing gown.
Got the Health Check belatedly done from the notepad. Well, this week is a vast improvement on last week’s returns! On the level tab, the L=Low, M= Medium and H= High for each scale.
Just look at the urine colour chart levels. Looking so good at the moment. (Just, mayhap I shouldn’t have said that?)

duties. Not good at all, in several ways:
①: The time lost waiting for the fully-in-control of . I tried to do the crossword while waiting for the action that had come part-way and was stuck rigidly to restart. But , and were making it very difficult to read the clues. So I counted the cracks and cobwebs on the wet room ceiling instead. Cracks 32, Webs 2.

②: I gave forth with a convoluted sort of… “Oooohargh… ach, (grinding what few teeth I have left) Ohohoho… Phew!” As the motion finally passed!
③: Then the task of cleaning things up. The water closet was not refilled again. So, I had to fetch water from the kitchen. Not an easy task with a walking stick and carrying basins of water, but I got it done in the end.
④: I managed the four trips balancing act, and I got the tank refilled. But, on leaving the room, I shoulder-charged the door frame edge again! This encouraged to join the other active ailments. I know I shouldn’t have, but I took an extra-strong over-the-counter Ibuprofen painkiller after I realised how bad the level of bother was that was giving me. At one stage, I checked to make sure that the shoulder bone hadn’t been detached from my elephantine, flobby-bodied torso. Hehehe!

Still a cloudless sky out there. It hardly looks like Nottingham usually does from the Detention Cells at Winwood Heights. 
I’m in cell-block Woodthorpe Courts. It was a life sentence. You won’t be able to get your medications; The Wardens have told me that they will arrive the next day… on eleven occasions over the last three weeks. I did get part of them, with the usually failed promise that the rest will be delivered or fetched by the Carers tomorrow – again. Naturally, I’m still waiting for them. The NHS seem to be having difficulties getting any a . The water in the WC tank is not refilling, so I have to carry water to refill it from the kitchen every time I need to empty the catheter contents or use the . Many an , , and tumble. Also, my walking into doors and window-frames are all part & parcel of life in my beloved Woodthorpe Court Cell Block.
Still, it’s much better than them posting/moving me to an ‘Alcatraz’ (Care Home). After I had the stroke, the needed bed space at the hospital, and I@ was dispatched to such a home… and remember many of the events during my 3-month stay. If it wasn’t for Brother-in-Law Pete and Sister Janet fetching clothing from the flat for me, I’d have run out of clothes. So many did not return from the laundry; you would not believe it!
Fair enough, here in the Woodthorpe Cell Block, over the last six months, I’ve lost five bobble hats, four T-shirts, two towels, a dressing gown, pyjamas, and a jumper. But this is nothing compared to the Alcatraz. One week, I sent six items, and I never saw them again! I’m not a lucky person.

The wonderfully healthy-looking colour of the catheter bag’s contents continued to be, well, impressive! great!

I made an Asda order for next week. All went well, but of course, is their habit; there will be price increases and not available to add to the equation and situation.

During the day, Carers Sam, Josef, Jodie and Sam called on me.

In the PM, the sun got through. I took these shots facing the sun, and was pretty pleased with how they came out.

The weariness dawned on me, and my eyes were failing again. This is now a hemerine event. and will be, until I can get at least the cataract operation done and dusted.
That is if I live long enough or the shortages of medications do not see me off first. I can see the headlines now: ‘Old Fart in Nottingham killed by the NHS & Parmascist’ Haha!

This view of the late afternoon clouds was an absolute pareidolia’s delight!
And I found some animals in it, not saying what they were. That’s because, my looking at this now, I can no longer find them. I do feel a right fool! Which is understandable.

Waking up just in time to get these two
shots of the brilliant sunset as the sun fell
out of view over the horizon. ♥

The day bag emptying was again almost a perfect colour!.

again.
Carer woke me up. Sorted what med we had in stock. And, of course, no night bags to swap for the day bag on … one day,  we may get some.
My estimate would be approximately September 2029. Or am I being over-optimistic in thinking I’ll live that long? Haha!
♬ Food Glorious Food ♬: Got in a bit of a pickle with having to work out the timing of the cooking of this feast. The oven, saucepan and microwave were all used in the preparation.
Sliced crispy roast spuds, boiled spuds, carrots, onions, and beetroot with gravy and soy mince.
I enjoyed this one. And the plain yoghourt with lemon curd added.
Flavour-Rating: 8/10.

But I was grossly disappointed in the lack of sleep again! No pains this time, just wave after wave of Thought Storms. Humph!

Go Forth with hopes of better times to come… Or, not like! Hahaha!