League of Mental Men Party Manifesto May 2015

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League of Mental Men Party Manifesto

aa01a

May 2015

aa01Immigration:

Spokesperson: Clivey Dee

Yer… what about it like mate? We know what we’re doing! Now push off… turd!

Taxes and the economy:

aa02clSpokesperson: Marissa Bergen:

I will remove the VAT on guitars and drums, this is essential for musicians and budding musicians and of great concern to me that the high costs may well stunt the musical aspirations of the delinquents in the UK, thus forcing them to take-up unworthwhile careers in banking, the global economy or study history at Nottingham University rather than try to win but failing to of the European Song Contest for the country.

aa01The NHS:

Spokesperson: Inchcock

“We will ensure that all peoples of 69 years of age and over, with a replacement heart, and suffering from angina, arthritis, sticking reflux valve, deafness, haemorrhoids, duodenal ulcer, baldness, deafness, bad eyesight, dizzy spells, hernia and loss of short term memory will be treated 24/24 by jaguaresque nubile nurse day and night nurses and receive free beer tokens, a daily lavender massage and will get free membership of the ‘Support for Ex-Gas Lamp Wick Trimmers Association’. The finances for these new services will be raised by the NHS refusing to treat teetotallers, pavement cyclists, Olly Murs fans and Demented Liberal Democrat supporters.

aa03MSSecurity Defence & Foreign Affairs:

Spokesperson: Mike Steeden

We will save this Nation an absolute fortune with our innovative ideas for the transformation on the UK’s land forces. And, the Boy Scouts, Boys Brigade and Liverpool ball-boys we replace the soldiers with can rest assured that they will not be on a Zero hour contract! We will legalise weed and Outer Peruvian Gin for them as well.

aa03RachelJobs:

Spokesperson: Rachel Carrera

It is essential that we have no person unemployed whatsoever when we apply our manifesto for Jobs. There will be a new chain of education centres built throughout the land to be known as the Carrera Colleges and anyone not in employment will be forced to attend one of the many various courses in job-related study that ill be made available. The cost of these training coursed will b paid by the government – anyone not getting a job after successfully completing their course will repay the costs themselves. Anyone failing their course will be detained at Her Majesties pleasure awaiting deportation when we can find someone to take them.

aa04alienEducation:

Spokesperson: Alienora

New disciplines will be introduced to help the students into work so they can buy books to read themselves. Erotic tales, Rampant Bedroom Antics and Naughty Nights In will be the first courses.

Housing:

aa03GcSpokesperson: Shirley Blamey

Builders, repairmen, electricians, plumbers etc will be bound in honour to provide an acceptable service to house holders in the future. Nissan huts will be provided locally for any poor sod moving house. Failure on the half of the said service providers will lead them open for punishment including a fine, their wrist slapped an having their testicles removed with barbed-wire covered pliers and then stripped naked and nailed to the floor for victims of their shoddy work to pee over them and pour bleach and petrol all over their prostrate bodies before being set alight.

aa03GzLaw and Order:

Spokesperson: Gaz Hoadley

The new LOMM police force will replace the current Police Service. This body of officers will require constant contributions of money, sex and encouragement. Their body armour machine guns, pistols and and state of the art lazer weapons will be paid for by the imprisoned ex-MP’s and their families.

Benefits/Poverty:

aa01aSpokesperson: Buffalo Tom Peabody

Both of these will stop immediately we get into power. Anyone wanting to know how – please visit https://buffalotompeabodyblog.wordpress.com/ Thank you.

Alcoholic Testing Facilities:

aa03GzSpokespersons: The League of Mental Men

All current and new brands of alcoholic beverages on the market must be tested my members of the League of Mental Men before going on the market. Testing of each brand will be done over a period of six weeks in support of a fair deliberation being made by each member.

Inchy Today: Fri 3rd Mar 15 – Armed Robbery

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Friday 3rd April 2015

Struggled to get to sleep again.

Dream recollections:

I was working as an industrial cleaner at Carter’s Drinks (Which I actually did 19 70 > 1980): I seemed to forget where things were located and was frantic as I searched for floor scrubber, cleaning rags, breathing masks, pulleys etc everything I needed – the factory seemed larger and newer the layout changed the people different – had to climb railings high up on the walls?…

Out in the wild countryside next: Flat field country lanes yet hills all surrounding me, driving around searching for something or someone, again frantic in my determination to find whatever it was – My attire seemed to be a camouflaged army denim outfit but with me pyjama bottoms on, no gaiters but with issue boots without socks – a nagging unrecognised voice chaffing away in the background chastising my failed efforts and telling me how pathetic I was… Just what I didn’t need that!

0402

Then I found missen failing to climb out of a quagmire of mud up though coffins, graves, headstones, trees overgrowth and could only get my head and shoulders above ground and each time I did I fell back into the mire…

0502

Checked on the weather when I went down to make me cuppa – Damp!

I reckon this was an early morning dream because I could remember many bits of it.

Made notes of it and went to make a cuppa – WC’d, no blood! Laptop on Coreldraw9 froze and I was back to feeling frustrated. Tsk and Tut!

Took the morning medications.

Set alarm to remind myself of the Iceland arrival twixt 0900 > 1100hrs.

Managed to get the graphics done for this post, despite Serif and Coreldraw9!

Spit and polished myself and went down to await the delivery.

0501

Armed robbery at me local Iceland

The Iceland driver told told me there was no paperwork so if anything short damaged or overcharged to ring the Arnold branch, but not for 24 hours as the police will be on site for that length of time. Last night the shop had had an armed robbery and everything was upside down. They had to make the order up from the Hucknall store. I could tell something was different by the mouldy satsumas, crushed beef slices squashed kitchen towels and out of date bananas I received.

Read about it on the news site, thankfully no one was physically hurt during the raid by the three cowardly gits who scared the staff. Makes my blood boil this – and even if they catch the vermin – what will happen? A slap on the wrist? Grrr!

0504

Set off to the bus-stop – still wet… the weather and me!

Set off to the bus stop – no pigeons, too wet for em perhaps?

Down to Hucknall Road and caught a Three bus into Mansfield. Goes through the villages this one so settled and sat down with me camera in hand hoping to get some interesting photographicalisations en-route.

When we went through Hucknall Front Street I just missed getting a photo of two chaps having a set-too outside the bank, but they both ran off?

0505

Hucknall Pavement Cyclist

I did catch one of those naughty pavement cyclists though as he weaved at a good pace between the pedestrians, who by the time I’d focussed and aimed had magically disappeared?

The rain persisted and when we got to the Hucknall Market stop the weather prevented me from taking a photo of it.

We left Hucknall and at the next stop I saw some horses in a field, in their coats and near the hedge – I thought the rains not so bad now, I’ll see if I can get a shot of them for the TFZ gals… But a chap got on the bus and sat next to me – big chap… very big chap – squashed me up so I couldn’t move and even started to impede me blood flow.

Thankfully he got off a few stops later – what a relief!

Had to fight against nodding off as the bus got warm and the seat comfy despite me piles stinging.

0505a

Arriving at the un-crowded Mansfield Bus Station today

Arrived at Mansfield Bus Station, not many folks about, no fights, no screaming kids, no families arguing, no threatening yobboes… it was a bit unnerving in itself that.

How I appreciate the free pensioners bus-pass!

As I left the end of the station to take the under-pass towards the B&M store, a bus driver was checking on the damage he’s caused when his but had hit a BMW – the front bumper I reckon would need replacing. The BMW driver was very cool and calm when the bus-driver started taking photographs of the damage – presumably as evidence in the event of an over-claim?

0508

Mansfield’s B&M store – At this stage the rain had almost stopped… for a bit!

I plodded down through the flooded under-pass and into the B&M store – where I got some Burton’s Fish and Chips snacks at £1 a pack (3 packets of 5… Hehehe!). Tesco and Asda £1.59!

Then I popped into the Poundstretcher store next door and had a poddle around.

I risked getting two small jars of Beetroot at 49p each – and when I tried some later found them to be nice and soft and sweet – wish I’d bought more now Tsk!

Took me midday medications.

0507

Heavy rain on the way back to Nottingham today

Back to the bus-station and caught a Pronto bus back into Nottingham. This one takes the direct route.

The weather became rather fearsome as we left Mansfield, vicious rain – not that it stopped the driver Stirling Moss like.

I ate me mini-pork and pickle pork pie and packet of seaweed, took a photo of the rain hitting the front of the bus and fell asleep… Tsk!

0506

Brands Hatch bus route into Nottingham

shower

When I woke up, we were about ten miles further on driving on the dual carriageway neat Hucknall – I took a photo of the traffic in the driving rain – glad to be inside and not outside of the bus at that time.

Again I drifted off into slumber.

I only just woke in time to drop off at me bus-stop in Carrington.

Th rain had now abated somewhat and was only a light  and the winds had dropped as alighted the bus and crossed over Mansfield Road pelican lights back to the flea-pit.

Made use of the porcelain (No blood – hurrah!) and put me bits away.

Bling04

Me nosh tonight Tasty!

Made some ham sandwiches on bread thins, with some of the pickled beetroot and tomatoes I’d purchased and microwaved a box of French Fries. Overdid em a bit, but I like me chips crispy, browned and solid as a rock. FibMode

Took me medications.

Watched a BBC episode of Hustle then promptly fell asleep. (Again? Getting worried about this now.)

Woke up a couple of hours later disorientated and nearly took me evening medications again. Huh!

Don’t expect to get much sleep in tonight with all me little old man doses wot I’ve had today.

Did some Facebooking and blogging.

… Still here at 0130hrs trying to get to sleep… Humph!

Inchcock Today 2 Mar 15: The day of decrement… of his concentration

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Thursday 2nd April 2015

IMG_0007

A murky start to Thursday

I didn’t nod off last night until gone 0400hrs this morning.

Woke at 0815hrs wide awake, made a cuppa and took me morning medications – a bit late like but still.

Me ailments seemed to be kinder to me this morning. Testimony to the effectiveness of the Pressure Relief Pillow?

IMG_0008Found the 50p book I got from the charity shop yesterday near me sleeping spot on the floor – so I assume I must have tried to read it last night when I couldn’t get to sleep – though perhaps not because a quick glance at the first page held no memories for me.

Not that that is anything unusual for me nowadays. Tsk!

Started this diary then did a bit of facebooking before getting myself ready for a walk into town on a ‘Bling Photo Search’ for the TFZ gals. (Managed to get two decent ones.)

0301

The sky brightens up a bit on me hobble into Nottingham

Set off on me walk into Nottingham City Centre – a bit brighter now, the wind far less than yesterday thankfully.

On my hobble three pavement cyclists passed me before I’d gone 500 yards – but I couldn’t get me camera out in time to take a shot of them.

I was moving well this morning until I got passed Huntingdon Street and a dizzy got me – not very comfortable feeling but it dissipated in a few minutes I’m glad to say – must remember me GP visit next Tuesday about this problem. Left the hands shaking a bit this time, and the itching and aching started inside the upper arms again?

0302

Pegasus At-Risk updated

Made me way to the Nottingham Central Police Station and mounted the steps outside, then the steps inside up to the desk/counter.

Where I took another look at the updating letter I’d received that needed filling in – then asked the lady at the counter to have a look see if I’d done it correctly or not.

All was okay and she posted it in her internal mail for me back to Pegasus.

How kind and patient she was – bless her cotton socks.

0303

The old BBC building slowly disappearing now…

I had another nasty dizzy as I left the Police Station – bit worrying that one.

Over the road towards the Vic Centre and Tesco with the intention of getting some more of the special offer Burtons biscuits at £1 – to find they have gone back to £1.59… huh!

Still, I did get  some Marmite crisps and cheesey seaweed that is rather a delicate flavour and is not on me list of banned foods yet.

0305

Nibbles from Tesco today

Limped through Victoria centre shopping mall and on me way noticed that the ‘Boost’ franchise had once again got some customers at their stall – well one anyway.

Two staff working there today – things are looknig up for them methinks. I’ll have to try one myself one day – mind you, I didn’t look but I’ve been told they are very expensive?

0304

A customer!

I took some ‘Bling’ photos en route for the TFZ gals to post on their site.

0306

Kids at risk!

As I came out into the air I stood a while with another dizzy, not a bad one though – and took some photographs of the Nottingham pedestrians love of danger as they crossed the road against the lights with little interest at all in the safety of their kids.

I felt okay again and walked on over the crossing… with the pedestrian lights on

0309

Danger Zone for the less mobile of us

green I’d like to add (Hehe) and down Clinton pedestrianised street – where I received many knocks with people banging into me as I did me best to avoid getting actually knocked off me feet!

The mobile phone user were out in number and I’m considering asking for them to be classified as a dangerous to health species?

0308

Refuse lorry mounts the pavement in Nottingham’s Slab Square as I hobbled through it

Onward down to the Slab Square where I noticed a refuse lorry using the pavement.

Plenty of Nottinghomian’s about today.

I slipped some seeds to the pigeons.. I know I shouldn’t but when I see one injured I can’t help myself.

I hobbled through the walk to Marks and Spencer’s where I thought I’d see if they have any of the Marmite biscuits in stock – they didn’t.

0311

Bin lorry seeking victims to crush…

Hey-ho!

As I came out of the store the same refuse lorry I saw earlier was now seeking pedestrians to crush outside Marks and Spencer’s, I assume he’s managed to miss those at the tram stop.

Feeling a bit tired now, I made my way back up to the slab square – just managing to avoid being clobbered by one of the City-Hire mobility scooters near McDonalds – a close thing this time – Tsk!

0310

The Sky darkens…

The place seemed to have attracted more folk than usual.

The sky began to darken a tad as I walked passed the front of the Council House – and I noticed that there must be another wedding ‘do’ on, as taxis were dropping folk off near the steps… the steps that weary 69 year old disabled Nottingham folk get thrown off of by CPO’s when they try to shelter from the rain so as not to impede the ingress of those who have paid a fortune to get into the wedding… never mind.

0312

Protector of the Rich… nice gal!

I spotted the same CPO doing the same duties on the steps and took a photo of her as protected the well off against any Nottingham citizens with the cheek to want to climb the steps and hinder the affluent in their… I’m getting carried away again, sorry.

I wobbled up King Street to the bus stop and managed to get a seat on a Carrington bus.

As I sat waiting for the bus to set-off, a kerfuffle was taking place outside a store on Parliament Street, but the windows were too dirty for me to get a photograph of the shoplifters removal from the store – Tut!

Dropped off the bus and checked the twitchle for yobboes – all clear, so cut through feeding the club-footed pigeon when he saw me and came down for a nibble.

0314

Black bean feast… lovely!

In the hovel and WC’d.

Took me evening medications.

Made a microwaveable Iceland Chicken in Black bean sauce, putting a tin of garden peas in it and had it with some bread, a banana and a cuppa.

I have to say the flavour was gorgeous.

Fell asleep.

Woke after about 2 hours I woke and set about doing this post – and Coreldraw9 froze four times over the next four hours! I tried Serifplus after the first Coreldraw let down, but that crashed too.

It took me many hours to do this diary with having to force close and restart so many times – but it’s how things are – no one can help me just to get Coreldraw9 working properly. I’ve tried with all the laptops I’ve had. This is the most powerful one I’ve ever bought – and still the frustration remains.

Fed-up? Depressed? Me? Yes!

Did some Facebooking, set my reminder about Iceland delivery tomorrow and continued to involuntarily pass wind frequently, with obnoxious results. Tsk!

Inchcock Today Wed 1/3/15: Nemo Mortalium Omnibus Horis Sapit – especially Inchy!

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Wednesday 1st April 2015

I awoke thinking or rather trying to remember the dreams I’d had in me longest bit of head-down I’ve had for yonks – must have got although I kept repeatedly waking up and nodding off again, a total of 7 hours actually sleeping. I can’t believe how tired I still feel despite this.

First day of the new month eh? Did me ‘White Rabbits’ did you remember yours?

0301Went down, photographing the morning Sky as I did, and made a cuppa and cleared up a bit and make up a few pots of medication doses from the last of me supplies 0302tabsthat were available to last me until next Tuesday.

Started feeling a bit chirpier after having me cuppa and getting going on doing this post – then the inevitable happened while ingeniculating, a twinge of gargantuan proportions emanated via Arthur Itis reminding me not to feel so happy, contented or confident again – I should have known better really – Tsk!

Still on the bright side Anne Gyna is leaving me alone up to now, the torn muscle is fully bearable, the reflux valve is behaving, the duodenal ulcer is fine and no dizzies. Only the haemorrhoids are joining in the attack with Arthur. There I go again, getting confident and opening me gob…

The INR Warfarin level test results were delivered – 2.7 now, much closer to me target now.

Did some Facebooking for an hour or two (Well four).

Had a ‘getmissenwashed’ session and got the bits ready for the Nottingham Hospice Charity shop and set off in the gloomy windy weather with em, the rain had long stopped. (Try saying that quickly when you’ve ‘ad a few – Hehe).

The wind hindered me progress as I walked into Sherwood.

0303carI noticed a car pull up dead on the double yellow Bus Stop sign in the bus-lane outside ST John’s Church on Mansfield Road – the driver got out and collected something from behind in the middle of the road that he had lost or had dropped off his vehicle and placed it in the boot? Wonder what it was?

I plodded on up the hill and down into Sherwood then up the hill through Sherwood when I came upon the take-away food shop that did the nice roast potatoes. Although it was getting late I nipped in to see if they had any hot-food left.

Seeing they had just three portions of roast potatoes in trays I joined the three other customers in the queue – then realised I had not got enough money on me – Knockerbongoblow!

I nipped out and next door to get some, money from the Co-op cash machine.

Then returned to join the queue again, with just one tray of potatoes left on show – luckily none of those in front of me bought it and I was well pleased with getting it.

Of up the hill towards the Nottingham Hospice Charity Shop with the clothes and DVDs – as far as Wilkinsons when I realised I only got one bag in my hand and not the two I had earlier – oh dear… hobbled rapidly back towards the take-away convinced I must have left it in there. As I passed the Co-op there is was stood near the cash-machine – Lucky lucky lucky!

41T7Saw a poster for a sale where they were selling a ‘Fire Opal’ necklace/broach at an auction: ‘Reserve Price Applied’ whatever that means.

But the I photo’d the photo as I thought it was so beautiful for the TFZ gals.

Onwards up again to the Hospice shop and had a little natter with the girls there, handed them the donations and a little bag of nibbles.

Down the hill and at the bottom I had to go into the 0304vanroad to get around a self-hire van. Then seconds after taking this photographicalisation of it – a bus had to come to a full stop as the traffic accumulated at the traffic lights to the left causing a queue of traffic as far as the eye could see.

But it allowed me to limp around the van into the road to get passed more safely.

Up the hill and down towards Carrington.

0305homeThe sky suddenly brightened for a minute or so, then darkened rather quickly.

I could tell we were in for a drop of rain – and boy did we get it later… unfortunately the wind didn’t lessen any when it came, but again didn’t stay too long.

However I did get in the hovel and perched on the porcelain before it came down.

The pain from the rear continued but no new bleeding – that’s good.

Had a wash and reheated me potatoes in the microwave with a beefburger.

I used the remaining two tasteless insipid bland Asda cheese and onion cobs and had me nosh. Gawd those cobs are like cardboard, perhaps less flavourful even – Eurgh!

The rain started again – but the sun still got through at times – did a scan for a rainbow but none to see.

The famous ‘Inchcock collapsing time came and the sudden tirdeness crept in.

Took my medications early as I felt I could nod off at any time…

0206cushWC’d.

Ooh… nearly forgot to mention this, the pressure cushion that I bought yesterday and thought a bit expensive at £20 works a treat!

So for any other sufferers of haemorrhoids or Coccydynia,

 here’s the photo again so you can know which one to buy – Ahhh!

Good morning Mr Inchcock, take a seat…

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GCInt

Inchcock went to an arranged meeting with someone from the Nottingham Homes Counter in the Central Library building to inquire if he actually had any chance of being housed in a what they call ‘Independent Living’ – which used to be called Warden Aided Flats within the surrounding area of Carrington.

It went something like this:

Homelink lady: “Good morning Mr Inchcock, please take a seat.”

Inchcock: “Thank you.”

Homelink lady: “Now what is your problem?”

Inchcock: “You assume I have a problem very readily – why can’t I be just making inquiries?”

Homelink lady: “You can be making inquiries…”

Inchcock: “Can I appeal against your placing me in the waiting band category D housing applicants? The lowest one which your staff informs me no one on this list has ever been housed?” 

Homelink lady: Muses over Inchcocks paperwork…”They are right, but they shouldn’t have told you that – do you know the name of the assistant who told you this?”

Inchcock: “No! – Did you not receive the letters in support of my application from my doctor, the hospital and the local police?”

Homelink lady: “Oh yes, but they are worth nothing as long as you own your own home – we must look after those with children and families…”

Inchcock: “So I’m being victimised for living on my own then, let’s sue the wife for dying eh ?”

Homelink lady: “Let me finish please… where was I? They are worth nothing as long as you own your own home – we must look after those with children and families… the homeless, poor asylum seeking immigrants and the mentally challenged.”

Inchcock: “Oh, so if I had several kids with various partners, was an immigrant or had a mental illness this would qualify me then? Being harassed mugged and attacked by the local yobbery, having a dodgy ticker arthritis angina duodenal ulcer, hernia and early onset of memory losses being unable to clean the house and not knowing any councillors personally goes against me then?

Homelink lady: “I didn’t say that!”

Inchcock: “I know you didn’t – I just said that!”

Homelink lady: “Said what?”

Inchcock: “So if I had several kids with various partners, was an immigrant or had a mental illness this would qualify me then? Being harassed mugged and attacked by the local yobbery, having a dodgy ticker arthritis angina duodenal ulcer, hernia and early onset of memory losses being unable to clean the house and not knowing any councillors personally goes against me then?

Homelink lady: “It’s a simple fact that you cannot be considered for… hang on! Not knowing any Councillors personally you said goes against you?”

Inchcock: “I did!”

Homelink lady: “Why?”

Inchcock: “It’s true innit?”

Homelink lady: “Are you suggesting that we here at Nottingham City Homes are being intimidated, bribed or are in an allegiance of some sort with Nottingham City Councillors Mr Inchcock?”

Inchcock: “Glad you admit it gal…”

Homelink lady: “I admit nothing… there is nothing to admit to, I think you must be mad to make such allegations – this interview is being recorded you know…”

Inchcock: “Mad? Me? Do you really think so midduck?”

Homelink lady: “I am not your duck! And yes I do think you must be crazy to come here throwing such intimations around – this interview is terminated Mr Inchcock!”

Inchcock: “Thank you petal – before I go will you sign this statement I prepared earlier to the fact that you consider me to be mentally ill? – Then you can move me up to band C and I just might get #’@~$ing 10% chance of being rehoused…Hehehe!

She carried a good left hook…

This bit of nonsense was inspired by a dream that Inchcock had.

Inchcock Today 31/3/15: Feeling a tad perantique today

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Tuesday 31th March 2015

Woke up and failed to remember me dreams… remembered BJ was coming though, so got up (forced missen like) and got the laundry stuff ready, nibbles for the gals.

Surprising myself I also remembered I had to go to the GP to make an appointment – And – to go to the chemist to see when me medications needed collecting.

Made a note of these and put it in me pocket.

0201skyIt was very windy, the rain was falling, the morning dank – I passed wind that stan… never mind…

BJ arrived and lifted me to the launderette bless him. He seemed okay this morning glad to say.

Mandie was on duty at the launderette, always does me good to see her – mind you I don’t think it does a lot for her seeing me, but hey-ho!

Got the machine going and thought I’d nip to the chemist then to the GP to book me appointment then to the newspaper shop to see if I’d won the lottery… Note: Extreme Optimism Mode Adopted & Engaged here!

0203chemistSo off to the Chemist who informed me the next carrier bags full of medications is due in a two weeks time – Tuesday after next.

So off up the hill to the GP surgery to book an appointment as the rain joined the wind in making it an unpleasant day all in all.

0202rainI approached the surgery entrance way and realised as it was closed and locked as soon as I read the opening times on the door like (I’m quick yer know!) that it didn’t open until 0840hrs.

As I left the rain persisted down with a vengeance and I rushed (Well I say rushed… hobbled a bit more rapidly would be a better description) to the bus-shelter and stayed beneath the awnings until the rain abated.

0830hrs came, then went in and booked me appointment – that being next Tuesday at 1330hrs with the locum.

Out again, the rain had eased but not the wind and then to the newspaper shop. No winning on the lottery, Ah-well!

0204AsdaAll done, BJ ran us to Asda, where I got some bits including a large tray of small seasoned potatoes to try for nosh tonight.

The giant Gnomes were still on sale at Asda’s entrance.

We soon got finished and BJ offered to run me to the disability shop in Sherwood as I’m mentioned I was looking for a cushion that would protect me coccyx and help me ease the pain of me piles – polo mint shaped like.

Bit of a surprise finding they had a choice of them in stock – a bigger one when I saw the prices £20 – £23 and £30 each.

I took the £20 one cause it was the best looking and most suitable design for me personally like… FibMode

0206cushThe Pressure Relief Cushion that cost me more than the first bed and clothing I ever bought!

Fair enough that was a few years ago, I use the word ‘few’ in it’s loosest sense of course.

 BJ ran me back to the hoppit and dropped me off.

0207noshWC’d then started to cook the gorgeous looking potatoes to have with some beetroot and franks, along with the cheese & onion cobs that I’d treated myself to from Asda.

They were horrendous, appalling, rancid, and fowl!

They may have looked nice but once 0205Asdacooked… eurgh! Spit!

Even the cheddar with cheese cobs were pretty uneatable – bland, no taste insipid!

The beetroot was nice…

I’ll have a bag of Marmite crisps later to get the none-taste of these out of me mouth! Hehehe!

Did this diary after forcing myself to nearly eat the meal, then some Facebooking.

Took me medications with some water – and they had more taste than the crap potatoes and cobs.

Feeling well tired and depressed again now and had a bit of a dizzy but nowt bad… hello, the eyelids are getting heavy again… Sweet dreams!

Inchcock Today: Mon 30/03/15 –

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Monday 30th March 2015

Damned painful night all around I’m afraid.

Intercostal muscle, reflux valve and angina – Tsk!

And – I can’t remember me dreams again!

Remembered I’ve to meet Pete at 1000hrs to go with him for his mole photograph and have my INR testing done at the QMC.

Must get me LOMM posting done ASAP.

IMG_0035Made a cuppa and took me morning medications and got the laptop on.

Took a photo of the pink sky as I hobbled down.

Red sky in the morning – shepherds warning?

I hope I don’t get soaked again today to add to me medicationalistcal problems.

By the time I’d got me things ready it was again too late to walk into town so I caught a bus. (Heaven praise the pensioners free-bus-pass service – Alleluia!

Met brother-in-law Pete at his bus-stop and he torn a piece out of me for calling his Mole a wart and a photograph an x-ray in me yesterday’s diary when I mention him, then proceeded to explain in detail what he would do to me in the event of any such errors in the future before cuffing me around me head and pointing a finger or two of derision in me mush!

I think I might have annoyed him?

We had a good natter… well as good as any other two deaf old codgers could on the bus we caught – which turned out to be the wrong one – so we got off and 0102being as it wasn’t raining walked the last mile or so.

Pete took a photo of me hobbling along trying to keep up with him.

We went to the haematology department first and  waited in the queue, number called and I was in taking the nurses their nibbles and being tended to by a new nurse who seemed very pleasant. Even had a bit of a natter while they waited for the vein to stop bleeding – took a while to stop today.

0104Pete and I then asked at the reception desk for direction to the photo place and were informed where it was and we set off to the lifts, then the ‘D’ floor and while we waited Pete couldn’t resist the children’s scooter in the waiting area.

(Well I asked him to pose with it – hehehe!)

Seconds later the lady came out and took him into the room to be photographed – during which I started to read the paper and the lights dimmed, went out and came back on again. I wondered what they were doing with Pete – along with the noises emanating from the room it reminded me of Frankenstein!

He was out in a few minutes, I couldn’t see any raised or frizzled hair so assumed he was all okay. Hehe!

We caught the bus back into town and Pete wanted to call at the Kitty Cafe, then go to Aldi.

Jane and he have booked a sitting with them over the internet. £18 I think he said it was – but no doubt if I’ve gotten it wrong again he’ll let me know, oh dear…


We plodded on to the Chinese shop in Hockley and I got some seaweed and Pete got whatever bits were on Jane’s shopping list , then we moved on.

0107As we walked along Huntingdon Street towards the Aldi shop I espied the first bit of Nottingham Street Art of the day. Pete pointed out the finer points of the creation to me.

No idea who the artist was of course but hugely impressed with how he/he had used the alcohol and water bottles arranged attractively surrounded by chicken bones, banana skin, mouldy chip, nub-end and bloodied tissue – another Andy Warhol I thought? Shame the artist isn’t famous too – mind you, he/she was probably too pissed to realise the masterpiece that they had created?

Pete got some bits from Aldi and as I waited for him at the check-out, no less than two ladies approached the Obergruppenfurher member of staff holding their till reciepts telling him they had been overcharged? Not the slightest sign of being concerned about this at all showed as he just checked each receipt and grunted something to the operator and handed the second lady (I didn’t catch what he said to the first) some cash for what she was overcharged or short changed by and just carried on… Aldi? Mmmm?

0106We left and walked into the Victoria Shopping Mall where Pete needed to attend the WC. (For once, I didn’t?)

Waiting for him I noticed the ‘Boost’ fruit juice stall was bereft of customers again – then as I took the photograph one arrived! Again I had to winder ‘How do they make it pay?’

We pressed on and out over the walk-over where Pete took one if his wide photographs of the traffic and boy did it come out good or what? Yes it did! (See below please)

0105aHow he got the bus to appear half real half ghost was brilliant wonnit?

He sent me a copy via email later and I doctored it with 0103wording only and posted it here.

I took a photo from the other side of the walk-over showing a fruit stall and Nottingham Post vendors box. The pub in the background, the ‘Old Dog & Partridge is where the stairs come down from where we were, and Pete suggested a wide photo of the pub and he took one for me for the TFZ gals.

NCCwdogI used this one as a template for the post header. Clever stuff from Pete today.

bling4I nearly missed this one off – on suppose to be of my reflection in a cafe window wot he took earlier.

The way it’s came out is artistic and shows a different view of Pete and me in the background along with the buildings a bus and the trees and sky too – it should be in a gallery somewhere I reckon.

So I added a cut-out of me from a photo Pete also did with me camera.

Left Pete at his bus-stop and I poddled into boots to get some more of their effective sea-water nasal spray.

0109pigeoAs I walked through Trinity Square just two pigeons came down, one of them with a horrendously deformed claw, well a stub really and slipped them some seed.

I caught the bus back to Carrington and hobbled back to the pit.

WC’d.

Made some nosh, petite pois, potatoes and mini-franks: The enforced delay twixt them cooking and me eating them irke a bit!

0110Just as I was putting them in me dish to take with me to eat them – the call to the porcelain… the urgent call to the porcelain had to be responded to. And the pain and blood were not nice. Cleaned missen up and reheated the nosh – but I still enjoyed it.

Then realised I’m forgotten to go to the GP to book an appointment – Tsk and Huh!

Launderette in the morning and I’ve got to go to the chemists for me medications so I can call then and do it – famous last words!

Laptop on, Coreldraw9 didn’t freeze. (Yet)

Rear quarters still bad, Anne Gyna fair, Arthur Itis okay, Reflux a tad bothersome and the sneezing continues to hurt me pulled intercostal muscle, so things ain’t too bad at the moment.

BJ phones, he’ll pick me up for the launderette in the morning about 0750 – 0800hrs. I thanked him.

Took me medications now feeling a tad weary, but will I be able to get to sleep…?

TTFN.

Inchcock Today: Bleeding from the arm, leg and rear-end. Tsk!

/ Inchie / 6 Comments

Sunday 29th March 2015

IMG_0033I woke up scratching away at me left arm, left leg and rear end – I didn’t know which was itching worst!

After a few seconds I saw the blood on my hands and fingers that had been scratching away and stopped.

The arm and leg I put some antiseptic cream on – but it still it didn’t stop the bleeding on the arm and it began hurting as opposed to stinging. It looked to me like the lesion was caused by cracking skin?

A bit worried with this, so I tried a spot of Betamethasone cortisoid cream I had left over from me GUM clinic prescription left on the lesion and after a few minutes the blood stopped flowing. It seemed to weep water for a good while after, then seemed to stop, still hurting and itching? Sore now, more than hurting.

The leg was just a tiny scratch where I think I’d been scratching away at it.

The rear end was not the haemorrhoids but on me left cheek – that seemed to be only a drop of blood but I could feel the swelling?

Oh dear, what next I ask missen? I didn’t answer Hehe!

Eventually I nodded off around 0300 and woke around 1000hrs.

WC’d: Feeling pretty crap – now the angina was getting in on the act too – huh!

Too late to take me morning medications – but I did take just the beta-blocker.

0701Went down and put kettle on and made a flask – took a photo of the dismal wet windy weather outside.

I assessed me new ailments (The arm leg and bum). I couldn’t even find the lesion on the leg, like magic it had disappeared? The bum had healed (the piles were tender). As for the arm lesion, I must have been scratching at it in me sleep again, sore tender but not bleeding healed up, scratch-marks swollen made it looked a tad rough.

Not feeling too good really – not going to risk any walking today as when I came up the stairs with me flask I had a dizzy-spell that was not nice and lingered a fair while.

I think that the getting wet yesterday might not have help. Tsk!

(Poor old chap) Hehe.

Laptop on.

Flipping Coreldraw9 crashed again – Gnash!.

Did some WordPress perusing – then tried to concentrate on doing a post – not easy today.

Would you believe… I just sneezed and the pulled intercostal muscle has started stinging again now. What a hogwash start to the day… but it will get better I’m sure… Hopeful

Just some days I can easily get depressed – this is one. Hehehe!

IMG_0033The rains stopped now, but the winds still high and the clouds are moving about with great rapidity.

I must remember to pick up me INR record sheet and bus-pass tomorrow morning before going out.

I’m off to the haematology department in the Queens Medical, and meeting brother-in-law Pete in town as he’s got to go for some x-rays too.

Fatigued again now, and I haven’t done owt but computer related stuff all day.

Tsk!

Inchcock: His Depression in Rhyme

/ Inchie / 5 Comments

Inchcock’s Depression

Feeling sorry for himself can be addictive,

A solitary Life can still be conflictive,

Dislike of himself can be so vindictive.

Insults when he passes involuntary lively emissions of wind,

Essential that he has to remain thick-skinned,

They can be lethally pungent & musical like woodwind,

They make him feel guilty, as if he has sinned!

His angina he names Anne Gyna in fun,

His haemorrhoids feel at times like a blow-gun,

His dodgy reflux valve can stupefy and stun,

His WC visits on waking must be begun.

Arthur Itis ever present for the home-bound nomad,

But this does make the Nottingham lad a tad sad,

His repaired ticker still goes, making him glad,

But his relationship memories are so bad.

His lack of social skills are the worst ever seen,

He left school uneducated at the age of fourteen,

Got himself a job as a goffer and he was very keen,

Until he fell off the back of the lorry, rupturing his spleen.

Many woes and accidents were inflicted over the years,

So pain and frustration for Inchy hold no fears,

He take the insults and vilifications that he hears,

And the mocking, stares and incredulous insults he bears.

Easily he falls out with himself, on a daily basis too,

Happy memories can make him feel despairing and blue,

Yet self-destruction he seems intent to pursue,

He knows his failings and accepts them, although few.

What makes the old chap depressed and irascible?

Impecuniosity, frustrated with life? – Possible,

His ailments, unseemliness or his being gullible?

Or his being incapacitated and full of bull?

Is he really lonely, or is it imagined or an aberration?

Can he cope any longer with his lack of acclamation?

Why does he think he is doomed to cremation?

Never to know any true affection?

Hello… he’s cheered up and showing signs of jubilation?

Ah I see… it’s come back on has his BT internet connection!

28.3.15 Inchcock Today – The Nottingham Kitty Cafe opened today

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Going with Pete to the Hospital & the Kitty Cafe

Saturday 28th March 2015

So many dreams, but back to not being able to remember them – Tsk!

WC’d, haemorrhoids still bad, and I must have tossed and turned or something in the night because the torn intercostal muscle ain’t half giving me some gip this morning! Huh!

0601

Nasty looking sky this morning…

While I was making me cuppa to take me medications when brother-in-law Pete rang to confirm I was meeting him in town at his bus-stop to go with him on his hospital visit as a bit of support like – bless him, he’s a good lad.

Packed up the nibbles for the nurses and Janet and Pete then I got yesterdays diary finished and posted off, then got myself ready for me walk into town to meet Pete. Realised I was a bit late due to the extra attention required to me nether-regions so caught the bus instead of walking.

0607aGot the bus to town dropped off and the rain started again. Tsk!

Met Pete and we caught a bus to the hospital.

We walked around the side to the department we required at the back of the building and I gave Pete me brolly, he insisted on sharing it.

0605aWe got to the hospital.

Pete took a photo of me as I was taking one of him.

Seconds later he was in and being seen to – and out in about ten minutes – he’s going to have the wart removed and he has to go for a photograph to be taken of it first. Later he called me and arranged for me to go with him on Monday when I go for me INR tests, time to have a natter perhaps.

We couldn’t really today, because we were concerned about Sister Jane having tests today as well about her innards and Pete wanted to get back to her.

0606aWe caught the bus back into Nottingham and passed the newly opened Kitty Café.

Pete took the wide photograph I’ve used on the header with his mobile phone and emailed it to me later. Nice.

0605It appears you have to book a slot to go there?

The rain persisted down and Pete shot off to get a bus back to Jane – hope she’s going to be alright.

I poddled down to the slab square and thought I’d get under the shelter up the steps to the Council House building.

As I got me camera out I was approached by a lady-female PCO who asked me:

“Are you going into the building Sir?”

“No” I says “I’m just going to take a photo of the rain from under cover…”

“No your not… people need access to get into the wedding without hindrance!”

“Oh”

“Off you go then…”

So I went: taking a photo from the bottom step and getting awfully wet in the process.

06040607I limped up Clinton Street and over into Trinity Square where I slipped the poor wet pigeons some nosh like.

Took a photo of some ‘Bling’ fer the TFZ gals and waked down to catch a bus back to the flea-pit.

As I was waiting in the queue I noticed how the old Express newspaper building frontage looked grand in its surroundings – next to it on the ground floor is now a Tesco Express.

0608Considering there is a Tesco Metro three minutes (Well eight minutes for me like) walk away in the Victoria Centre, it was amazingly busy.

The ornateness of the brickwork is something you don’t see much of nowadays.

The march/protest came around the corner as I sat on the bus waiting for it to set off.

I cancelled when Pete got his appointment at the QMC.

It has little support and passed by in a couple of minutes – perhaps the rain put folk off?

I took a photo through the bus window but the grime and rain made it worthless – mind you it might have passed off as a bit of Modern Nottingham Art – sorry I deleted it now.

0602I just found out I missed off the photo that Pete took as I hobbed towards the centre earlier.

Now, the reason I look so old, ill, struggling and depressed is that I am old, ill, struggling and depressed.

That’s cleared that up then.

In the background is the works for the new tram service that will eventually go into the hospital grounds and on out to Toton.

The wind and rain still persisted and I just missed a heavier downpour as I got in the dump.

WC’d.

Has sausage sandwiches then started laptop – Coreldraw9 crashed – fancy that. Tried SerifDraw6 – that froze – getting fed up now.

The piles are still tender but the torn muscle is a lot easier now.

Fatigue and flatulence have arrived though… Huh!

TTFN all.