SUNDAY ODE
Advice For Whippersnappers – Part 2⅑th
Do no harm, don’t be lethiferous…
Try to avoid being fatuitous…
Resist acting violent, gratuitous,
If you have a win, it will be deciduous,
Good and bad things can be fortuitous…
You’ll seem at times fatuitous, bodacious,
When in the pub… you’ll appear streperous,
But at work, try to appear assiduous…
To try to cover for your hebetudinous,
Avoid drugs that make you feel somniferous,
Have a drink by all means, but don’t get stocious…
I used to do that, but in the morning, I felt atrocious!
Keep taking Covid-test; you can still be viruliferous!
That way, you can avoid capriciousness…
When you get arrested, do not show facetiousness!
And always remember life’s ephemeralness!
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
SUNDAY 29th MAY 2022
04:45hrs: 
Notwithstanding only getting three hours kip, I woke up with the usual jolt but feeling a lot perkier than usual. I went all industrial: Wee-wee, then dressed, and I did the medicationalisationing.
The thigh veins looked so very much improved, and I moved on to washing the tootsies, which were also looking much improved, in the bowl on the floor. Neither of them found their way onto the SDH card? That’s a good start, I muttered to missen! Through to the kitchen to make a Glengettie brew and took a couple of snaps of the red sky this morning.
Soon got the computer on to update yesterday’s blog. But of course, the $23 million a year salaried Mr Fries, boss of Liberty-Global, who bought out Virgin Media for $18 billion, still can’t get a signal to Nottingham that even pretends to be reliable.
So, very annoying!
So, I gave up and went to try to take more photographs of the view from the kitchen 
window. Hopefully, they will be a success this time. Especially as the sky had reddened more now. I must say they looked almost like a couple of water paintings. Bootiful! And they went on the SDH card 
this time.
I spent a few moments perusing for figures in the clouds, pareidoliaing. I think there was a face in the lower of the photographs? But I could be wrong… I’m very often wrong, you know. It’s a natural gift I have. Glaucoma Gladys, SAccdes Sandra and Cataract Kathie don’t help.
Back onto the internet. I must send Fries a congratulatory email to get a signal through.
WordPress had the same problem as it started yesterday. I cannot access the comments when I’m on editing, My Home or reading? If I click on the question mark, which is not always there, as you see in this snap of the computer screen, I can sometimes get the list up? Fed up with this!
Started to update yesterday’s blog and altered the ode in it, which, on reflection, was not a good idea. I got carried away on Word Hippo to get some new rhymings that were suitable… three hours later… ♫ Oh, Susan ♫ chirped from the doorbell. Cheeky Charley came this morning to do me. Lovely chirpy lass, But the poor gal was not her usual self. Not offhand or anything like that, but seemed a little down; bless Her!
As I pressed on with the blog again, a rumbling from the innards had me hastening to the Porcelain Throne. A lot of painful effort was needed to complete the evacuation, and I had a go at the crossword book while waiting. I also spotted that the condition of the feet and lower legs had improved an awful lot this morning? Not complaining, like! Not as messy as yesterday.
The noise from above was barely noticeable. I hope that the disdainful, dismissive lad is not poorly or in pain.
I got around to drinking my first mug of tea of the day, and it was coming up to midday! I had made four mugs of tea, a Glengettie, Thompson’s Punjana, and now a Thompson’s Signature tea. I let go cold all the others – not on purpose, of course. I allowed myself half of my new daily ration of chocolate with the tea, two squares from a block of milk chocolate. Hehe!
I went through h to the kitchenette to wash the mug and found my feet sticking to the floor! I’d spilt some of the chilli-con-carne, I think, earlier when I was prepping Josie’s Sunday nosh. I bravely decided it needed a good sweep and mopping session…
I got the old spinning mop bucket out of the wet room, freshened the round disc mop, and cleaned the floor. On the heavy press pedal as I was spinning it for the first time! Not sure how I managed it, but it shot back up on me, and off came my foot? 
Naturally, it didn’t affect me. A man of my heroic nature, cool, calm and concentrated. With a proclivity for remaining composed, unruffled, and in complete control of myself, at all times. I was totally unruffled… Well, erm, maybe…
I checked on Josie’s meal and moved some of the Chilli Con Carne into a plastic bowl so she’d 
have enough for a second nosh later on.
Then got on with the mopping of the kitchenette floor. I made sure it was well dried, in case I had to go back in urgently to check on the food cooking for any reason… Now that’s something I seem to be getting short of lately… sense! Hehehe!
Sent off the Saturday blog and made a start on this one. Then sorted Josie’s tray out for her.
Some nibbles and a can of G & T. I actually remembered that she gave me that look last week when I gave her a can of… Oh, what was it? Woo-Woo or Mojito, I think. I think I’ll go into a Smug-Mode again… There you are! Hahaha!
I delivered the meal on time again and got an approving look as she inspected the can of G & T. She said she was on the phone with a friend, so I didn’t keep her.
As I entered the flat, I noticed the three waste bags still there laying on the box. Not taken to the chute for me. But it gave me a bit of exercise. I made another one and popped them all into the chute. However…
Coming out of the room, I had a minuscule, short involuntary right-leg Neuropathic Schuhplattler drop-something and flail-about dance. It only lasted a few seconds, but the timing was not good as I closed the door. Ah, well!
I turned the oven on and got some updating done on this blog. Took a break to make another mug of tea… I’m determined to get one drunk today! Took a distance and close up pictures of the beautiful 
looking sky.
The zoomed-n shot was not up to much, inferior quality. But taking it, I was sure I’d captured a figure of a face… but no! Tsk!
I had convoluted to get to look and the WordPress comments.
I’ll get my chips in the oven now; they should be hot enough. Sat and nodded for a few minutes, then got up and searched around for the missing magnifying glass, which had not been seen for months, and the mysterious hidden-away somewhere headphones. No luck with either!
Got my nosh sorted out and served up. The new Morrison’s beer-battered chips were not to my liking. A Flavour raring of 6/10 was the most I could give it. All else was okay. Whenceforth, I’ll try to get only the curry-flavoured ones. But they substitute such a lot. Hence the beer battered, which I did not order.
I was just about to nod off after eating what I did of the plateful, and the ♫ Oh, Susana… ♫, the Evening Carer arrived. Got the meds sorted and was off in a flash. Bless her! No waste bags; I took them myself earlier when the morning gal missed taking them.
Bill Ziegler, I like his style of writing and humour. I checked to see if any comments had come in and replied to them. Then Facebook catch-up… a lot had to be done.
Head down in search of sleep… and, importantly, staying asleep! Well, that was a failure…
The Sweet & Sour bread was well buttered and filled with plenty of the delightful tasting Polish Szynka Biata pork. My own recipe of burnt BBQ flavoured chips and sliced black tomato. An orange jelly and spray cream dessert. I 
enjoyed it all. Flavour rating 7.5/10.
As I exited the wet room from doing my ablutions, I walked yet again into the doorframe, giving it a decent shoulder charge in the process. Swear? Me? Yes!
I made the brew and Eurgh! It was not even warm, let alone boiled? I switched the kettle back on, washed the mug out, turned, and the kettle had stopped working altogether! I fiddled with the contact points and tried again. Ah! it’s lit up…
But it did! Peripheral Neuropathy Pete’s neurotransmitters failed at the flipping wrong time – just as I was pouring the water into the mug! 
As I got inside and rested Metal Mickey on a flat bit of the floor, it dawned on me, miraculously, that the J Sainsbury order is coming today! Crikey, it’s due 06:30 > 07:30hrs! It could arrive at any time. 
The chap transferred the things from his plastic boxes into my cardboard ones in a jiffy. I gave him a choice of cans in thanks (Gin lime & Lemonade), and off he went. Not a lot there today?
As I unloaded the boxes, I realised there was a lot there. 
Jenny and Francis. Something that didn’t matter was replaced. But the cheese curls were very hard! Bit of a disappointment that was
The fridge did not look very full after I’d emptied things and stored them away? A bit baron, I thought. Or is it me, being got at by Dementia Doreen again? Hehe!
Carer Richard came in without ringing the chime. Made me jump a bit. No way I can hear anyone knocking on the door. I was initially concerned that the chimer may have broken. Till he told me he had on the door. Well, it is the end of his shift. Haha! Bound to be feeling tired now.
I decided to take the flowers to Jenny and Francis, my treat; I hope it perks people up a smidge. Although later, Jenny emailed me telling me I didn’t have to bother. Which didn’t help me to cheer up much! I had to stop blogging for a while, not that it was going well anyway.
The snotty one was drilling when I got back to the computer, but it was still dour progress. Herbert kept the noise to short bursts, intentional or not; I appreciated that.
I went onto the balcony to take a photo of the end car park and decided not to bother. This is the only photo I could get onto the computer of the holes and cracks in the balcony roof joints.
Ups and downs today! I spent hours more blogging and was beginning to enjoy it a bit more when for some inexplicable but heaven-sent reason, the Neurotransmitters made contact with the brain! And stayed that way for about an hour; it was utter bliss! It couldn’t last I realised that, but it was so nice to type and know when the finger ends made contact with every button I hit on the keyboard.
Here we go. Oh, heckithump! SYS 164 DIA 66, Temp 34.1°c.
I made up an evening meal, but not what I planned to make. All four foods were excellent and tasty. The garden peas, the yellow tomatoes, the ready-cooked smoked bacon, and above all, the Cheesy-Twists, tasted heavenly! They had been overcooked, with hard crispy edges on them both, but that is how I like them! Ah, well, I ate it all up.
Evening Carer Valerie arrived, as I was just finishing the nosh off. It was all guesswork as to what she said; the gal has a low voice for hearing, bless her. I offered her a choice of nibble or drink in thanks. She took a handful. Hahaha! Valerie took the black waste bag with her to the chute for me. ♥
Luckily, I’d been taking many photographs, and even luckier, I managed after a frustrating battle with the computer’s SD card reader and got them loaded to use here. Although some of them I can’t remember taking. 
This is not, or is it, from Friday cause I seem to recall that the red van-man was parked back in his favourite illegal position on the chevrons? A good start, that is! Hey-Ho! I vaguely remember going onto the balcony to take this photograph, obviously using the Fuji camera, because of its shape, of the end car park… but no, on second thoughts, another cock-up I’ve made.
I think I got the icons back up, but not to what size they were; they are mentioned in the notes. As if the farce with trying to get the photos loaded from the card, and my giving up on the job. (I tried again in the morning and got the on! Yee-Haa! There was a lot of scribble concerning me making tea and dropping the mug, but catching it before it hit the floor and getting my fingers scolded a little. Hehe! I wondered why 
I took a shot of the morning skyline, and, according to the notes, I thought it was beautiful despite the gag colouring?
The more exciting thing was as I was closing the window’s door, I inadvertently caught the button on the Fuji camera and took a shot through the bottom glass. Hahaha! It came out better than any photo taken.
A mention of kicking off early with the clattering and tap-tapping was read. How I could have heard it with the state of my era-holes is surprising. It must have been loud?
SYS 158, DIA 69, Pulse 95 and the body temperature was 34.5°c.
I found another mystery photo I cannot recall taking, let alone why? However, the computer is not on. (See that? How quick I was to notice that? Hahaha!) It looks like it’s teatime ish, cause the lights going. It might have been when I gave up on blogging. Or not, maybe, perhaps, possibly…
Then eventually, I got the meal served up. It doesn’t look much appearance-wise, but I did enjoy this vegetarian effort for a change. Baked potatoes with butter, a leek onion and something else, I forget what it was now… ah, potato pie. Tomatoes and fresh garden peas. I can remember them cause I left them in the pan when I was about to 
start eating the meal. So went back and salvaged them. Put them on the plate and took this snap. Flavour Rating: 7.2/10, methinks.
I woke with a double whammy of ailments; I think that’s what woke me up. Still, it made a nice change from being woken up by Arthur Itis, Cathy Cartilage, Anne Gyna or Duodenal Donald. And plus as well, they both claimed down within a few minutes! Oh, I forgot to tell what they were, Tsk! 
I’d got the camera nearby, so I took a one-handed snap of it – Clever stuff! Well, alright, it wasn’t clever then! Hehehe! I’d got Colin Cramps distorting my right-hand something wicked.
Oh, Dearie me! The Blood Pressure was well up this morning. The body temperature was still low. SYS 169, Dia 73 and Pulse at 90. But was I bovvered? Nope! This feeling that lingering… it must be what it feels like when on dope? Har-Har! 
He was on form today. Considering that there will have been many noises I didn’t hear, there were dozens of times I did hear him due to my wax build-up. He’s consistent; I’ll give him that. He’s also an
Carer Helen Did the morning call. Ah! I remember she’d brought the washed laundry back for me. I found it all screwed up again, crammed into the bag! I think I might as well ask cleaner Esther to do the washing; she folds the clothes for me, saves ironing, and uses the freshener and softener supplied. I’m not blaming Helen at all, whoever it was that took the washing out of the dryer, should be spoken to nicely, and asked if she could fold the clothes for me, in future, please. This still irritated me even in the odd uncaring mood I’ve been in lately.
Bobble hats coming tomorrow, T-Shirts on the 9th or 20th, and the much-needed jammie-bottoms on Monday (the 7th, I think). Still, in the odd uncaring mood I’ve been in lately, it didn’t irk me?
Boy, did I clout Cathy Cartilages’ knee on the doorframe, coming out… Yes, I did! It hurt! A suitable synonym would be ‘ARGH! I thought I’d seek some sympathy from the ladies out there, so I took a photo of the offending knee cap, intending to inspire compassion from the ladies, but it came out wrong. I expected the picture to show how painful, swollen and bruised the knee looked… But, No! Despite the agony, I can’t see any damage to
Worked on the blog, then got the nosh sorted out. Cut up a selection of orange, yellow and black Natoora tomatoes and got some of the Squid (anchovy) vinegar on them; I wasn’t sparing!
End up with this meal served up. Potato cakes (Seasoned), fresh garden peas, tomatoes and a beef pastie. I got tucked into it but did not enjoy it as I should have. I may have been a little too tired?
What a wet, embarrassing start to the day! I would guesstimate that from waking and getting to the NWWB (Nocturnal-Wee-Wee-Bucket), it would have been about a minute or so, although it felt like half an hour. And still, I didn’t make it in time! Shame, despondency, self-loathing, and the ignominy of it at my age… Weeing one’s Protection Pants! Still, they did the job, but unfortunately, I have little feeling when passing water nowadays and pulled Little Inchie out before he’d run his course… So, the second job of the day was cleaning up and sanitising, then a change of pantaloons, washing myself thoroughly, and getting the socks, jammie-bottoms and jumper in the bowl soaking in Dettol. Well, that wasn’t planned!
Now I should have been in a Dracula Depression over this, but I had no idea why; maybe the embarrassing event when wee-weeing had overridden… What am I talking about?
I got the blood pressure and the temperature taken. I didn’t bother taking any pictures. I felt it would be a waste of time. The SYS 158, DIA 69 and temperature 34.8°c, seemed okay.
I took a Dioctyl (Poo-softener) capsule again. Getting things moving took a while and a lot of painful effort. I’ve not had to apply so much pressure for such a long time in years. All the way through as well! Still, to my surprise, there were only specs of blood. And the innards soon settled down again.
Ah, I suddenly realised that there had been no noise coming from Herbert this morning? I hope he’s not well and had an accident.
today, one tomorrow. Shame they were not both on the same day. Hello, that’s the third change of ETA! Not that it matters, really. It’s just the thought of it coming late in the night and my having to stay awake to receive it that bothers me. Also, will the delivery person leave it in the reception foyer or bring it up to the flat? Mmm? Or… is it a ploy to have them both delivered on Saturday? Which would suit me; it’s just not knowing.
I tried to get the photos onto the computer again. Much to my amazement, the reader let me load some, not all of them, but still. Here’s last night’s super-supper. Which went down superbly, even if 
it was eaten after midnight! I burnt the potato waffles to perfection for my tastes. The beef, potatoes, cheese, and bean pasties were a delight and tasted. The mini tomatoes, red, yellow and green, were smashing! Which leaves only the mushrooms… Oh, dear, not good, I ate only one of them! Someone mystery person, whoever it was, told me to try wine vinegar with this fungi, so I did! Sickly sweet they tasted. Which kept the Flavour Score down to 8/10.
The end of Citrus Walk photo was… no, no, Chestnut Way, showing Red Van man parked back in his favourite position, on the yellow no-parking chevrons on the roadway. Not that it would bother him, I’m sure. Potentially blocking any Fire Engines from turning to get to the flats. Whoever he is.
A photograph of the Ocado carrier bags that were delivered this morning.
Ah, well, time to get the shaving, medicating and showering done. I thought I’d check on the Amazon tracker first…
now. Exciting this is, innit? Well, not really, so fair enough!) I’m easy to entertain, ain’t I? Hehehe!
It’s still coming, but further away now? It’s all new to me this tracking lark. 
As I say, I’m easily pleased.
I made a vegetarian feast tonight. A Bean & cheese flaky pastry pastie. fresh garden peas, honeyed parsnips, ready-prepared M&S Parmentier Potatoes – Diced British potatoes coated in shallot and garlic butter and sprinkled with thyme. (Boy, they were good!), with yellow, black & red tomatoes. Followed by a lemon mousse and a lime & lemon dessert. Taste rating: 9.2/10! It was worth the time to prepare and cook and the effort and time to clean up the mess I made afterwards. It cost a fortune as well! Lovely! I slowly digested every morsel, like a gastronomer.
♫ Oh, Susana ♫ played from the door chime, and in walked Carer Elena. She soon sorted the medications out for me. I was having difficulty in hearing what she was saying with the ear wax blocking my hearing and the mask she was wearing. So despite her many patients, accommodating, asked-for saying it again… I had to guess what the Angel said, half of the time. But she left happily enough, taking the waste bag with her to the chute for me. 💙
I had a wash (I do that sometimes, you know), and got the bamboo socks on, and I got down in the recliner again.
I worked out that I’d been in the arms of Sweet Morpheus for about six hours! Fought off the Thought-Storms, with the aid of needing to use the Porcelain Throne.
I rose up onto my aching for some reason feet and found that Cartilage Cathy had departed from the right knee – which of course should have given me some glee, but, you see… Arthur Itis had returned with a vengeance in both knees! So, hobbling about is going to be a smidge painful today. Methinks. 
I wobbled my way to the wet room, sat, and waited… waited some more. Got the crossword book out. Then, still awaiting the commencement of any evacuation movement, I counted the veins on my right thigh. Back to the crossword puzzle, solved about three or four more clues, actually. Not the time for any Smug-Moding. Still not a sign of any rear-end activity! 
time. It eased more rapidly after I’d cleaned things up and applied the precious Germoloids ointment to the rear end. For some 
reason, I felt I could so easily get back in the recliner and back to sleep. And wanted to! Then I liberally applied the Phorpain Gel to both Arthur Itis’s knees and gave it a good rubbing in! Put a dab of Germolene on the arm where I walked into the doorframe yesterday. I didn’t mean to! Hehe! It’s surprising how a nothing bruise like that can hurt? Not that I’m complaining, after the Porcelain Session agony. Even I’ve got to laugh!
Got the computer on, and ♫ Of Susana ♫ rang out. It was the Carer Richard arriving. A good lad, who’s been down a little lately, but I can report that he was his old self again this morning! I don’t mind him coming later cause if I am the 
last call, we usually have a natter after the medications and Alarm wristlet battery checks. 
I pressed on with yesterday’s blog and got it posted off. 
The shower, shaving and Teggie-cleaning, apart from hitting my head on the power-box once again, went very well.
Getting dressed went okay, but the medicationalisationing had its moments of farce. I ended up with
I checked on the end car park… No, the photograph has not been doctored! It really is the red van’s man’s car, parked between the lines, and in the car park, as opposed to his usual blocking the entry/exit on the chevron lines. I wanted to congratulate him, but of course, being whoever he is, he’s parked in the Contractors Only Parking Space. Hahaha! But at least he’s found his way into the car park and not blocking things, so. Well done, mush!
Hello, the intercom is flashing? It was the Wilko delivery. ♫ Oh, Susana ♫ was chiming out from the doorbell when the driveress arrived. A helpful gal, who took the boxes into the kitchen and checked the number of items, blessed her cotton socks. I am a little concerned about the size of the box containing the Air-Cooker. I thought I’d ordered the smallest one? I’m going to struggle to get that on the minimal space available in the kitchenette? Oh, dearie me! It may have to be given away or sold to someone with more room? Still, Carer Richard is calling another da this week, and he has one. In fact, he encouraged me to get one. So, I’ll ask him to open the box to set it up when he calls, or if he hasn’t the time, I’ll ask him to put it in the other room for me, it’s blinking heavy, so it must be a big one… Tsk! I must get something right one day!