Inchcocks Future Fun Newspaper Headlines

.

Future Sports, Covidity, and Politics, unsung,
Including Boris, Cummings, even Cameron,
I threw myself into creating these, then the phone rung…
Told me the Bank is closing its branch… that’ll be fun!
A bill from the Council, Carers Fees, that stung!
Two weeks ago, Meridian arranged a direct debit…
About as reliable as Norman Tebbit!

Here they are; I hope you get a smile from;

Inchcocks Future Fun Newspaper Headlines

I fang You!

Inchcock’s Make ‘Em Laugh Series

By Inchie

78 years of age, pretty ugly, short, bald, pot-bellied, in ill health. Decaying physically and morally. Mechanical ticker valve, Duodenal Donald, Saccades-Sandra, Arthur Itis, Hernia Henry, Hard of Hearing Hank, Bad eyesight Boris, Reflux Roger, Peripheral Neuropathy, Nerve Neurotransmitters Not-working Wendy, Bladder Cancer Chris, Stuttering Stephany, Haemorrhoid Harold, Shaking Shaun, Dizzy Dennis, FND, ... there are others, but I've tired myself out, now! Hehehe! Oh, then I had a stroke! Now awaiting Cataract & Glaucoma operations. Diabetes 2, Leg-Ulcer-Ulrich, Cartilage Chloe & Carole and am flat-bound. Tsk! Failures, Accifauxpas and Whoopsiedangleplops are my Forte... Hehehe! I love making folk smile when I can. TTFNski!

9 comments

  1. Timothy Price – I specialize in daily art, documentary and promotional photography. If you have a special event such as a musical production, play, concert, etc. or have a product or fashion that you need photographed, or you are a performer, musician and artist in need of promotional photos please email me or call.
    Timothy Price says:

    Nice news ditty.

    1. Inchy – Nottingham. UK. – 78 years of age, pretty ugly, short, bald, pot-bellied, in ill health. Decaying physically and morally. Mechanical ticker valve, Duodenal Donald, Saccades-Sandra, Arthur Itis, Hernia Henry, Hard of Hearing Hank, Bad eyesight Boris, Reflux Roger, Peripheral Neuropathy, Nerve Neurotransmitters Not-working Wendy, Bladder Cancer Chris, Stuttering Stephany, Haemorrhoid Harold, Shaking Shaun, Dizzy Dennis, FND, ... there are others, but I've tired myself out, now! Hehehe! Oh, then I had a stroke! Now awaiting Cataract & Glaucoma operations. Diabetes 2, Leg-Ulcer-Ulrich, Cartilage Chloe & Carole and am flat-bound. Tsk! Failures, Accifauxpas and Whoopsiedangleplops are my Forte... Hehehe! I love making folk smile when I can. TTFNski!
      Inchcock says:

      Cheers, Sir. It’s the graphic making that I love so, Tim. But only when they come out okay. Hehe!

  2. Bill Ziegler – Cincinnati Metropolitan Area – I am a former resident of Delhi Township. These are memories of my life and times in that community during the 1950s and 1960s. A time capsule.
    Bill Ziegler says:

    Those are some stunning graphics, mate. Boris Johnson is looking a bit better than normal, much younger. Ever the staid stalwart leader…or the total opposite, of course.
    Great coverage on the 1/4 of the matches that were not cancelled. By the way, I like the fractional issue 1045 3/4 as the most-recent number.
    Grizelda Plunket, a possible reference to the famous Grizelda of good note.

    TTFNski,
    Billum and HRH reporting

    1. Inchy – Nottingham. UK. – 78 years of age, pretty ugly, short, bald, pot-bellied, in ill health. Decaying physically and morally. Mechanical ticker valve, Duodenal Donald, Saccades-Sandra, Arthur Itis, Hernia Henry, Hard of Hearing Hank, Bad eyesight Boris, Reflux Roger, Peripheral Neuropathy, Nerve Neurotransmitters Not-working Wendy, Bladder Cancer Chris, Stuttering Stephany, Haemorrhoid Harold, Shaking Shaun, Dizzy Dennis, FND, ... there are others, but I've tired myself out, now! Hehehe! Oh, then I had a stroke! Now awaiting Cataract & Glaucoma operations. Diabetes 2, Leg-Ulcer-Ulrich, Cartilage Chloe & Carole and am flat-bound. Tsk! Failures, Accifauxpas and Whoopsiedangleplops are my Forte... Hehehe! I love making folk smile when I can. TTFNski!
      Inchcock says:

      Bless yers Billum, thanks.
      Indeed the 6’4″ real Grizelda came to mind at the time. (Ah, sweet memories returned there!)
      Har-har!

  3. Bill Ziegler – Cincinnati Metropolitan Area – I am a former resident of Delhi Township. These are memories of my life and times in that community during the 1950s and 1960s. A time capsule.
    Bill Ziegler says:

    The groundrules were set to allow yer perfect graphics to find the room for stirring victories and wretched disapponment simultaneously. Fings aint wot they used to be, but memories color enough to make the world somewhat credible. The Newt Year is still young and is swimming about wif the tadpoles. Dive in old and crawl out young…but is it the other way around. Grizelda switches to and fro from 6′ 4” with lots of muscle to 6′ 4′ with lots of gristle. Memories is odd fings, is it so, or is it ain’t? Or ain’t it is?
    A good time to stop and feed the raccoons.

    1. Inchy – Nottingham. UK. – 78 years of age, pretty ugly, short, bald, pot-bellied, in ill health. Decaying physically and morally. Mechanical ticker valve, Duodenal Donald, Saccades-Sandra, Arthur Itis, Hernia Henry, Hard of Hearing Hank, Bad eyesight Boris, Reflux Roger, Peripheral Neuropathy, Nerve Neurotransmitters Not-working Wendy, Bladder Cancer Chris, Stuttering Stephany, Haemorrhoid Harold, Shaking Shaun, Dizzy Dennis, FND, ... there are others, but I've tired myself out, now! Hehehe! Oh, then I had a stroke! Now awaiting Cataract & Glaucoma operations. Diabetes 2, Leg-Ulcer-Ulrich, Cartilage Chloe & Carole and am flat-bound. Tsk! Failures, Accifauxpas and Whoopsiedangleplops are my Forte... Hehehe! I love making folk smile when I can. TTFNski!
      Inchcock says:

      Haha! I fanketh you Sire!

      1. Bill Ziegler – Cincinnati Metropolitan Area – I am a former resident of Delhi Township. These are memories of my life and times in that community during the 1950s and 1960s. A time capsule.
        Bill Ziegler says:

        Hehahe! Yer is welcometh, Sireeth!

  4. Lilly – Fort Thomas KY USA – I'm a published poet and essayist on women's lit, southern women's writers and have been a contributor to Know Theater Tribe original dramatic productions of evocative prose poetry. I also enjoy building, water color and acrylic. My work background has been from exec. secry to university fellow TA; advising;and consummate entertainment maven during a dream job as home maker! I traveled a great bit to and from my home state of CA and enjoy kayaking on the harbor and horseback riding. I love nothing better than an espresso and good music with a driving electric guitar! Ciao! (I'm also Italian and hot blooded!) This was written before cancer and the lock down! Now things feel quite different. I'm still me - kind of locked down with my two male family members! I will talk about both of them regularly and both are amazing people sharing the same DNA! I'm the "other" who slipped in and stayed for nearly 30 years when I planned on two! My life until I joined my family seemed both alarming and intriguing to so many people, I have been encouraged to write about the events that both formed, challenged and enhanced my state of being. Your kind attention is appreciated.
    Lilly says:

    Are you feeding the raccoons or do you mean you took out the trash?

    1. Inchy – Nottingham. UK. – 78 years of age, pretty ugly, short, bald, pot-bellied, in ill health. Decaying physically and morally. Mechanical ticker valve, Duodenal Donald, Saccades-Sandra, Arthur Itis, Hernia Henry, Hard of Hearing Hank, Bad eyesight Boris, Reflux Roger, Peripheral Neuropathy, Nerve Neurotransmitters Not-working Wendy, Bladder Cancer Chris, Stuttering Stephany, Haemorrhoid Harold, Shaking Shaun, Dizzy Dennis, FND, ... there are others, but I've tired myself out, now! Hehehe! Oh, then I had a stroke! Now awaiting Cataract & Glaucoma operations. Diabetes 2, Leg-Ulcer-Ulrich, Cartilage Chloe & Carole and am flat-bound. Tsk! Failures, Accifauxpas and Whoopsiedangleplops are my Forte... Hehehe! I love making folk smile when I can. TTFNski!
      Inchcock says:

      Ah, I’m not sure, Lisa… Hahaha! ♥

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