Part 2: My Beloved Grizelda – Bringing her home

02 GrizGiselda was about 5’11” tall, around 15 stone (solid with it), lovely black hair, gorgeous wide hips, tree trunk legs that I instantly wanted to wrap myself around for a month or so. I went where no man had gone before… and boy was it good, did I enjoy it or what!

Part Two – Taking her home…

I was getting myself ready to go and pick up Grizelda, as arranged, from the cottage she was staying in for her visit to England to visit her pen friend and my mate’s wife Susan.

As I was shaving, I was already getting palpitations from certain regions of my anatomy, at the very thought of once more gaining access to Grizelda’s foibles and bodily parts. I came out of dream I was in, and thought I’d better give her a ring to make sure all was still on as planned.

Surprisingly when I called, Susan said Grizelda was shaving too.

She passed on the message that she would meet me at the garden gate at 1100hrs.

I arrived, and as I saw her smile break out above that muscular body, I had to control my legs on the clutch.

I got out to meet her, and she picked me up gave me a wonderful slobbering kiss, put me down, and briefly cuddled my groin area and licked my bald head.

02 allegro

I named my old Allegro Estate, Wilhemena. She’s in the garage again here. She went there a lot!

She got into my Austin Allegro estate, the springs were tested as she sat next to me, and adroitly squeezed certain bodily areas of her choice.

We arrived back at the flat, and she did a tour of it and showed her approval.

I was about to make a cuppa and something for us to eat, when she called from the bedroom – that was that ended the cuppa and cakes idea for the moment!

02 bottleShe stood there naked, dominant, hirsute, and demanding attention.

I noticed an empty ‘Huntsman Bourbon Whiskey’ bottle on the bedside table – ‘Highly Suitable’ I remember thinking. She caught me alright… thank the Lord.


I opened my arms and clasped them around her – then did the same to her other leg.

I was thrown on the bed, and encased in her muscular body as she dived on top… ‘twas heaven!

I thought my ribs would have been broken, but didn’t care, as she rolled over and lifted me on top of her.

I licked her armpits, chest, neck, (avoiding the boils) as she turned over again, crushing my pulsing body beneath her now sweating stomach muscles.

Bliss ensued!

The planned trip to the cinema had to be delayed for another day (thankfully) as she was obviously intent and glad to remain available for more romping for the rest of the day!

My submissions that day were pitiful and pleasurable; I reached new heights of delirium in response to Grizelda’s handling of the situation and everything else she handled.

We went and collected her things from the cottage.

From that day, she stayed at my flat for the duration of her holiday… and my pleasure!

The memories of Grizelda are painful – only due to the fact that they are only memories now.

Part 20: A Nottingham Lads True Tales of Woe

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Co-op House Nottingham

I was working at the Nottingham Cooperative Society’s Co-op House on Upper Parliament Street, in the food hall, as general dogsbody, and not very popular goffer.

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The Caves

On my first day I was sent down to the cellars (Tunnels come caves) below the building, to lay mouse traps and rat poison, in an effort clear the place of the little mites. An order I thought a little out of the ordinary, but I followed them, collected the traps and poison, and went down into the bowels of the building to do my duty. (Little realising that the staff had set up a tape recording of eerie sounds, thinking it would be fun to scare me to death!)

I soon spotted the ‘Bush’ tape recorder after hearing the sounds it emitted, and carried on laying the traps and poison pots. By the time I’d finished, there were already some dead rats in a few of the traps.

Full of myself, I extricated a larger one from the trap, and carrying it in my outstretched hand, re-entered the store warehouse smiling and grinning, saying to I thought the mates I’d left assembling orders fro delivery, thinking I being rather droll and witty: “‘Ere you are then, dead as a dodo, we can put it in the mincer with the beef un make some money… haha…”

I stopped as soon as I realised the area shops inspector was stood directly in front of me!

I managed to get another job with Tesco.

Pat Phoenix’s Visit to Tesco

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Pat Phoenix as Elsie Tanner

Tesco on Granby Street in Nottingham, had arranged a promotional visit from Pat Phoenix, who at the time was playing the part of the very popular feisty Elsie Tanner in Coronation Street. She was supposed to sign autographs for ten minutes, and then do a mock shop to impress the public.

It was utter pandemonium, we had earlier built a wall of Heinz soup boxes covered in colourful crepe paper, behind which we had placed a table and chair for her to sit on and greet her fans, and offer her signature to them. (With her very large body guard stood next to her)

So many emotional fans turned up, we had to get all the male staff on the shop floor, to try and control them as they all wanted to speak to her first. At one time, we all linked arms to try and stem the rush of the dear old biddies from causing physical damage to the Ms Phoenix, it was like a football match at times.

Woes 20  02cigsShe and her bodyguard chain smoked throughout the time Pat was signing her signature for her fans. Rothman’s King Size they both smoked.

After about 40 minutes, she was able to escape the confines of the table and chair, did a very quick pretend shop, took her cheque, and left.

As she was leaving, I noticed that the soup boxes had their crepe paper coverings torn apart, and the tins were crushed and spread out on the floor during the melee. At this point, I also realised that I had blood coming from my ear-hole, and running down my white coat.

A few days later, a photographer, who had been taking pictures of the event on the day, came in, to find the staff in the photos he’s taken to sell them a print.

One of the girls (Kathleen, I remember Kathleen… sorry…) pointed out to me a particular photo; it was taken when I was in the line of staff trying to stem the flow of women, and it showed an old lady, about 5 stones and 4 foot tall, just about to push the pointed end of her rolled up umbrella into my ear-hole, in her efforts to get through to her soap opera idol!

Well at least I now know why I had to have four stitches in my lug-hole!

More Tesco Tales to follow…