Inchcock: His Guide for your new Wet-Room usage for the elderly

Now a dynamic 71-year-old veteran of his new Wet-Room for over eight weeks, Inchcock offers guides, tips and advice, aimed at any Nottingham City Homes Independent Living tenants dwelling in any of their excellent flats, from his own experience. Please be aware before reading further: This article may cause concern, fretting, shock, disbelieve and an apprehensive condition to any readers of a sensitive nature or who play Bingo.


Your bathroom will be turned into a spacious looking WetRoom for you, by the wonderful Nottingham City Homes maintenance team, above are the results from Inchies.

Be aware, they will tell you, you’ll have to manage for three or four days while the work takes place, without a bath or shower. Perfectly understandable, and you will appreciate the given warning. Unfortunately, it will actually take fourteen days and two to let the floor settle before you can use your new shower from the commencement of the work.

304If you are lucky, as I was, the chap who comes to do the job will be a grand bloke, who explains everything to you, is on time and cleans up after himself persistently and meticulously.

He took pride in his work, and I was most impressed with him.

Thanks mate!

After around the twelfth day, the electricians will arrive. They will not introduce themselves, 500they’ll just turn up and start working.

You can, when you realise they are they, sneak out and take a photograph of them.

The older one will not even notice, but the young lad saw the camera and posed for me immediately.

The older one didn’t say a word to me for to days, not until it came time for him to tell me about the shower workings. He did this is about 30 seconds, and I couldn’t understand a word he said, partially due to hearing difficulties and partly due to the speed 502in which he spoke unsmilingly, as they rushed off.

You may find, as I did, that they had fitted a dirty used double light switch for you in your hallway.

But, beggars can’t be choosers, can we now?

After all, we are not being charged for it, you know! The Occupational Therapy man Joel has interviewed you and decided you needed this doing.

503 504

You’ll also find pretty soon after the electricians have gone, the place will need cleaning up after them.Just as well I’d invested in a new cordless cleaner int it?

Just as well I’d invested in a new cordless cleaner int it? Mind you, the battery only last for forty minutes, so it ran out while I was removing the electrician’s bits of wire, broken off plastics, lumps from the wall and I’m still finding bits here and there now.

EleThe power for the shower switch will be located somewhere where it will be easy for you to walk into it as you pass by.

I assume this is a standard positioning from the antisocial, superior acting, know-all, I’m better than you, snotty Nottingham Homes Maintenance electricians?

10d2I can vouch for the size, solidity and potentially hazardous positioning of this box.

However, I waffle on too much, I do apologise.

I’ve made a graphicalisation of some of the risks pertinent when using your new shower.

I hope will be of help too!


02 ready

Inchcock Today Tue 2 Aug 2016: The new scales are definitely broken! I think…


Tuesday 2nd August 2016

Dienstag 2 August 2016

0410hrs: I sprung into life with a jump! I’d dreamt of amazing things, can’t really remember the fine details, I was so sorry I’d woke up?

A welcome indication of the need for a WWHD arrived from the lower regions. Along with the belief that I wasn’t ready yet to perform this duty, encouraged me to climb out of the shuddering wobbly £300 second-hand recliner chair and into the kitchen, kettle on, took the medications with half a Senna tablet and a cup of nice strong tea.

Gawd, it was cold this morning! The thermometer on the kitchen wall read 61°f Nippy that for August?

Arthur Itis was much easier, Anne Gyna was kind to me, Rea Flux still playing up mind, Duo Denal okay and the ankles and legs had gone back down a lot, far less swelling. I thought, perhaps with the water retention so much better, surely my weight must have gone down. So, to the throne in the wetroom for a WRHD session. Less painful a struggle today, but a bit of bleeding from the rear end. Took a while too.

10bSo, now the leg water had declined, I’d had a WWHD surely I was ready to mount the dreaded scales…


The heaviest ever this time!

I don’t want you to think I was depressed or angry with myself.

But I was, sad and angry with myself. Stumpshagglenob!

I got the nurses nibbles in the bag ready for the INR Warfarin blood test later in the day.

Feeling a bit down now, I got the laptop on to start the diaries and graphicalisationing on the TFZer project.

Ablutions carried out, nibbles, Anticoagulation card, empty jars and bus pass in pockets and off down on the walk to the surgery.,

10dCalled at the bottle bank down the road and deposited the jars, then stood on the end corner viewing the allotment area.

I love the green scenery, and the scarecrow someone had made! Hehe!

The blackberries were coming on, many fully ripe now.

Down the hill, up Mansfield Road and down again into Carrington. Took my time and got even slower after half way as the feet began to sting something horrible!

Booked in with the surgery receptionist and waited to be called in – which I wasn’t, because I didn’t hear the nurse calling and she had to come and tap me on the shoulder.

Nive chinwag while she took the blood, she even asked how Olive was keeping. Nice that! Handed over the nibbles.

Out and down the road into the Lidl insult giving shop. Got some bits and the new chap on the checkout gave me a foreign coin in the change and didn’t say thank you. I gave him the coin back informing him he could keep it!

The feet were worse now. Caught the bus back to Sherwood and waited at the bus stop on the other side of the road for twenty minutes for an L8 bus to arrive to take me right to the flats. Two tenant ladies joined me later.

The L8 didn’t come, but a number 40 did, but that does not take up to the flats, but two bus stops up Winchester Hill is better than walking.

10d2When we got there, I acted gentlemanly and assisted the two ladies off the bus.

They shot off at high speed up the hill to the flats.

I could not keep up with them. Tsk and bother, thought I might get a talk with them on the way, but no!

A painful limp and I was back at the flats.

I made a brew and got the laptop on – spent more hours doing more work on graphicalisationing on the TFZer project.

Called to see how Olive was, beautiful and radiant she was too! A chinwag and she rubbed in the pain gel for me in the areas I could not reach.

Her grandson arrived, and we had a further talk, then I gave her a cuddle and went back to the flat.

Got some beans in the saucepan to have with the pork pie, while I updated this tosh.

10d2Here it is on the left.nosh

Not the most inspiring dish of fodder I know, but I enjoyed it.

Curried baked beans, yellow peppers, sour pickled gherkins, a tomato and half a pork pie (Naughty). Followed by a banana and dessert, that guilt prevented me from eating all of it.

Put the dishes it to soak in the sink and checked the TV magazine. T’was one of those nights when there was so much I would have liked to have viewed, all on at the same time, Tsk!

Not that it mattered in the end, cause I soon nodded off and kept waking every few minutes having no idea what the plot or storyline was all about, or even what I was trying to watch actually.