Category: Twitching Neck Nigel

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Take one fresh and tender kiss,
Add one stolen night of bliss,
Memories are made of this…
I recall my female accommodationists,
But try to forget the ones I missed,
My thoughts of them bring bleakness,
Some tall, some short, some with blemishes,
Often the blissfulness was boundless,
The passion could also leave me breathless,
Refusals brought brokenheartedness,
And they were pretty multitudinous,
Some buxomness, billious or blasphemous,
The contact activity was bootilicious,
Grizelda Freudenburger, the musculeist,
Her groping unquestionably was the best,
Some antics, entanglements were just pauseless,  
She was uncontrolled and never passionless,
Excited, her eyes grew the colour of quarenders,
Our tangles showed a certain recklessness,
We shared shirtlessness and sillyness,
Her body? The height of sumptuousness,
Her mind & body were scrumdiddlyumptious,
We’d mate for hours; we were not abstemious,
I’m upset now, no Grizzly, just memories!
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I woke at 05:45hrs, with the acid surge coming into my nose and mouth. No doubts, I’d just woken up at the end of a nocturnal seizure.
At teatime, I did a search on Google, with this result: Nocturnal seizures are epileptic seizures that occur during sleep, often causing abnormal movements, confusion, or screaming (Not screaming in my case, no mention of the acidity upsurge?). They can be managed with antiseizure medications, adjusting your sleep patterns, and taking safety precautions, such as using a low bed or a seizure monitor. If you suspect you or someone you know is having nocturnal seizures, it’s essential to consult a healthcare provider (Hahaha!) for a proper diagnosis and treatment plan. 
Considering that I was diagnosed with Peripheral Neuropathy eight years ago, and the Doctor didn’t even tell me what it was or meant. (I googled it) With so many ailments it brought, and it is still delivering over the years. I told her (Those were the days when one could get an appointment at the surgery). I’d probably have as much chance of winning the lottery, and I don’t do it, or seeing Grizelda again and having mad, rampant, delightful sex every day.
I waited a while before removing the night catheter bag and doing my balance checks routine.

Carer Nimra arrived as I was coming out of the wet room after doing the ablutions and a chronically painful Trotsky Terence pebbled evacuation. 

The Doctor’s receptionist rang me on the landline with the results of yesterday’s INR Warfarin blood test. Changes of the Warfarin dosages, which I passed on to Carer Nimra. 

The window cleaners arrived as I made another mug of tea and started the blog’s Ode. The £10 for cleaning the balcony windows is now £15.

I hobbled onto the balcony to take snaps, thinking the glass would be clean, but no. The rain started to fall, fine, but a lot of it.
I thought I’d taken a shot of the end car park, but when I went to upload them, they had mysteriously vanished from the Kodak 2 Tim SD card. Again! 
This one is of the Chestnut Way front car park, look at the rain!
ANOTHER COCK-UP!
I was positive that I’d ordered this Asda order for next Wednesday.
Huh! Help!
The Age UK lady said when I was in the hospital that they would send someone to help me sort out the finances, and with my Arithmaphobia. I was over the moon when she said that. But they must be busy with so many more immigrants and with people getting older and senile. I
I’ve now got so much stuff in the fridge! I had to jiggle things about to get these in it. Help was promised with this problem. Nnothing yet, they must be so busy. I chose this ready-made meal for my feast. I’ll add some potatoes and gravy to it first.

Then Ejaz arrived, took the laundry down to the launderette & returned. Explaining that he did not have a bus pass to go with me to the Chemist. I only had 2 £2 and a £1 coin, change from the window cleaners. He called his base. Then he told me someone from their office would arrive in 20 minutes to give me a lift. Ejaz got he walker out of the balcony for me. I think he enjoys it when I leave him alone in the flat.
Ejaz had confirmed on the phone yesterday that the Chemist can do both jabs, and we didn’t need to book in. (See later Tsk!)

Ejaz said we should go outside to meet her, so we did. But I’d forgotten to empty the catheter before leaving the flat. We walked through the connecting corridor into Winwood flats. And used the disabled toilet to empty the pouch before leaving.

The young lady who arrived was the one who was so helpful last time—a lovely gal from my Carer’s office—and she was off to the Chemist.

Things Did Not Go According To Plan!
I didn’t need to say that, really, did I?
Ejaz had phoned the pharmacy yesterday and was told we could have both flu & Covid injections without an appointment. Great, I thought at the time! But lurking in my conscience was a realisation of my expectations from my ‘Bad-Luck’ omitter. I knew something was going to go wrong; my EQ is very rarely incorrect.
We parked up in the free car park, got the walker out of the boot and meandered onto Mansfield Road and up to the Ascent Chemist. They could not do both injections! While they were trying to get someone to do the COVID-19 one, The Carer fetched her car from the car park and parked in front of the Chemist. She said as she left that she didn’t think we were going to get it done, and that the car would be ready to try another one. Bless her, also to save me walking. 
The pharmacist said to try the one over the hill on the right. The Jayplex Pharmacy. We drove there and got both jabs done. With aching arms, hehe! I was lifted back to the flat.

Ejaz was still there; he loves being on his own. He’d got the laundry in the machine and mopped the kitchen for me. I thanked the gal for the lift, and Ejaz nipped down to get my laundry from the dryer. 
I was feeling pretty good compared to last year’s do, when I had a 22-hour sleep after having had the injections. Thankfully, I may have had a different type of COVID-19 needle contents this time. Because I only slept for five hours tonight. But well!

I had an amazingly different Long Seizure!
I think it must have been for a few hours —unwell. Was it the effects of the COVID-19 or the flu vaccine? But I did have the acidity upflux, so I believe it was a seizure, but you never know. Maybe a combination of both – why do I say this? I’ll tell yer!. It appears I took photographs I cannot recall, and lost them on Thursday morning.
After waiting for the acrid acid taste to dissipate, I was on the bed, which I cannot remember getting into. The catheter bag was well-filled, so I went to empty it —no balance problems at all. 
ARRRGH! I’d been in the wet room earlier, because  again. So I went to the kitchen to find another bit of unremembered activity I’d been up to. A meal — stew — had been mixed and placed in a microwave basin, ready for cooking. How the heck could I have done all these things and remember nothing about doing them? I know this has happened before, but it still narked and confused me. 

Ejaz came for the first night call, noticing the meal, saying, “You’ve already cooked a meal? Well done!”
I said nothing about not remembering; I knew nothing of what was in the bowl other than it was a stew of some sort. It smelled nice.
I had a quick look in the waste bag, a tin of Irish Stew, and a torn-to-shreds cover from one of the ready-made meals from the fridge; the Marmite and Bovril jars were not in their usual place.
I may have mentioned the long sleep or seizure, but I’m not certain… no, likely not.

Here’s a snap of the meal.
But not so glorious this time. One of my worst-tasting efforts for years! The extra potatoes I seem to have boiled and cut up were too hard for Toothache Tiffany to handle. But I ate everything else, despite the out-of-the-ordinary flavourings. Should this happen again, and I prepare a meal without remembering, I’m going to give it a wide berth and dish it in the waste bag!

Getting help with transport today definitely helped cheer me up. And a laugh and a natter with someone was marvellous, I loved it. Thank you, too, to the ICC.
Inner City Carers team.

Have a Great Day, each!

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My Odes seem to be primarily anecdotal,
I rarely spurt out anything apoplectical…
Educated, inspiring, but some are comical,
Yet creating them can often be ahemeral,
They are certainly not in the least aesthetical,
Are they sufficiently rhymed and/or poetical?
My fretting over this is rather pathetical,
But my failings don’t seem to get me all apoplectical,
Should they, though? Is that practical?
Do my thoughts & words appear tactical?
Tumbles: Four trips this year, to the hospital,
Many things in the pipeline, primarily medical,
My fears & worries at times seem astronomical,
Now, an Ode about Fact & Finding,
I find myself today, constantly self-alienating,
I began this Fau-Ode with High-Horis visiting,
Immediately, Sod them, I stopped worrying, 
I got as far as, and up to here…
Horis left, Depression Darius did appear…
Along with yet another fear…
Ejaz got out the Health Checking gear,
Sys 178 Dia 59, oh dear oh dear!
I dialled for advice, & spoke to a medical advocator,
Asked questions & put us through to a cardiologer,
She was a fact-revealing questioner,
My answers? Seemed a patient, interested listener,
I revealed all my worries, finances, arithmaphia,
Being flat-bound, hospitalised in September, 
Twice, for 3 days, then 3 weeks in October,
All through my tumbles and my falling over,
Peripheral Neuropathy & effects of each seizure,
The last whoopsie produced many a fracture,
3 in my knee, my wrist, hand and finger,
Depression, can’t get to see my Doctor,
My fungal lesion & about my having diarrhoea,
Finances are dwindling. Can I afford to keep the Carer?
I rattled on for at least a quarter of an hour!
Realising I’d been such a talker, a twattler…
I cringingly apologised straightaway to her…
Realising we’d been cut off, I felt a plonker!
As I put down the phone, the lady rang back,
She was still calm, not at all bombastic,
I feel this Ode is getting a smidge banausic,
She told me, if I get any pains, to call for a medic,
I told her I’ve always got them, she was mirific,
Contact your Doctor if you are worrying…
If I try to, I know what I’ll be hearing,
“You are in a queue of 19 waiting”…
I’m sure that I heard her laughing!
This Ode may be partly biographic?
A nurse came from the DVT Warfarin Clinic,
Then the phone started ringing…
I wanted to say, as she started speaking,
You’re the 150th person in the queue waiting, 
It was a lady from the Doctor’s surgery,
An ambulance is coming for me, Hehehe! 
So I added this last bit hastily!
I’ll try to catch up on Tuesday.

It might be difficult if I’m waiting for the nurse. I’m feeling alright in myself —well, I say, alright… Haha! And Ejaz has booked me in with the pharmacy for Wednesday, to have my flu & Covid jabs. I’ll see if we have time to call in the Dentists to get a prescription for more of the Duraphat toothpaste.

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They said on the phone that they are going to see if they can arrange for an oxygen supply for me to use at home. In the hospital. 25 minutes after the 111 call had ended! On the way home, in a taxi, an hour after arriving. Home 25 minutes later. Caught up and finished the above Ode.

Up, bag off, and off to the wetroom.

HC Checks. All in the Ode

Again!

Called 111. All in the Ode.

Carers desk, Why did I take this?

Once more into the wetroom.

Took this while nurse-spotting.

Getting fed up with this.

Any more to come?

Cumberland pie, with some
alphabet potatoes added.
Lime & Lemon yoghourt.
In the morning, I found
several empty bags of
Salt & vinegar and
Marmite puffs. Guilty!

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I envisage getting in trouble if I meet St. Peter,
Will he be rigid, stern, or a compromiser?
Understanding, compassionate, or a despiser?
Grim Reaper says he’s an educator,
What’s the point in my getting any wiser?
Is St. Peter a prison guard, or a confession-taker?
Immigrant assessor, or a boarder protector?
Is he real, human, an alien or made of ether?
I see gates & railings surrounded by arboriculture,
If I get in, will there be a cyberculture?
Will there be an Oligarch or an arbitrageur?
Or politicians, murderers? I’m not sure,
Will I be classed as a voyager or voyeur?
I imagine it will be a different culture…
Heaven, spirits walking around in a djellaba, 
Hell? What can they wear? Asbestos, due to fire?
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Will there be Angels, Wraiths awaiting?
How deep will the interviewing be?
They may engage in serious, in-depth questioning,
Will there be divination by alectryomancy?
Can I still get my Warfarin and Amoxycillin?
Will I need them? No, I’m being silly…
Will there be signs? This way, no smoking?
Will Hell have a fire escape, to flee…
Can Hell catch fire? Just asking!
Will lost relatives be waiting for me?
Stalin or Hitler? That’d be foreboding!
Will Hell be full of virulency & acrimony?,
This shouldn’t bother me if I’m not breathing.
Would Heaven be full of veracity & honesty?
Will they allow Be-Bopping and burping?
Hell, filled with Politicians & the Oligarchy?
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In Heaven, could anyone contract an infection?
Maybe withcraft, or ecumenicalism?
Could one be happy? Find eudaimonism?
Avoid floccinaucinihilipilificationism?
Life has left me thoroughly forfoughten,
Mainly due to my bad luck & depression…
Will I ever get my trephination operation?
I never did have any guts or gumption,
Will Heaven give me any redemption?
Will I still suffer from constipation?
That was another daft suggestion!
At St Peter’s Gate, we’ll be dead, no question!
Will we get our hearing back for the interrogation?
Will it matter where we lived? Which Nation?
I think being honest is best, an obligation…
Even over my failures and cohabitation,
I made far too many wrong decisions,
Did things without the needed permissions!
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Many of my decisions were wildly extensible,
Options, choices taken, were empirical,
I think getting through the gates is epochal,
It matters not if my brain is extracorporeal,
Mayhap Heaven & Hell are Ethereal?
Undoubtedly, it involves the extradimensional,
At times, I thought it was all science fictional,
Elusive, not there, a fantasy, an eschewal,
Contrived my humans, who were fissilingual, 
Who claimed knowledge, to be fatidical,
I thought it was all a load of falderal,
But now the gates wait for my arrival!
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Historical or mythical – causational excuses?
Consisting of a dream, unreal fantasies…
See the number of flat-earth believers?
But blind faith can often be bounteous, 
I, uneducated, show a certain skepticalness,
When High-Horis visits, I’m at my slaphappiest,
Horis is now on one of his longest-ever visits!
Writing this Ode’s been my easiest…
It flowed, cause I’m at my contentedist…
In a Sod-Them-All mode, & feeling blessed,
But will St.Peter understand my gist?
I feel drunk, but I’m a teetotalist,
But there’s no telling how long I’ll be unstressed,
Free, unreserved, or unrepressed…
This Ode may not be one of my best…
I just needed to get things off of my chest!
Before I get to St Peer, where I hope to be blessed.
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0615hrs: I stirred, and as I was taking off the nocturnal catheter bag, I showed a lack of concern. No worrying, and no fretting about the things that lie ahead, no plans or thoughts in my bonce. Then realised I was having a visit from ! A real ‘Sod-Em-All’ moment. I rose, did the balance exercises —no wah, shave, teeth, or anything.
It didn’t even bother me when I discovered away, and felt the need for the . I limped contentedly to the wet room and got seated on the throne. A good ten minutes later, the painful, concentrated Constipation-Conrad-controlled evacuation was over.
Then the cleanup and medication were done. No wash, just the hands.

Carer Ejaz arrived and noticed that the top of the catheter on the right leg looked much better. I found out later that I used the wrong photo, but it was too late to change it. Tsk! Ejaz then did a body check. Phorpain-gelled the left Cartilage, Chloe, and the fractured knee. 
Gave me medications, Codeine 30g, Atorvastatin, Lameprozole, Ramipril, Furosemide and Beta-Blockers, and made an Anti-Constipation drink for me. Then barrier creamed the Acne & Eczema spots on my back, underarm and under man-breasts. He then formed new spots on the top of my leg. Then, Ejaz helped me with the Health Checks. As you can see above, they are still a smidhe too high, and it has been 13 days now. Must phone on Monday, might ring 111, cause we can never get through to the Doctors. He’s a good lad.

The Iceland delivery arrived after Ejaz departed.
The driver noticed my Dememtiua badge on my dressing gown, and was as short & curt as he usually is. Which was nice, though it didn’t bother me much. Horis was still with me. I took some snaps of the fodder. Tomatoes, Teiyaki crisps, nibbles for the nurses, drinkies put in the fridge for them. Cumberland mini sausage, pork pies, chicken thighs and cheapo imitation smoked ham. Some baking potatoes, doing one of them tonight, I think.
I got the iced coffees in the fridge safely. I had to mop up a fair bit of water from the refrigerator. Mmm?

Got on the computer, as Horis Sensation started to wear off a little. And I prepared for the arrival of . He never fails to appear after Horis fades; he’s like clockwork —the git!

Depression arriving, I nipped out on the balcony to take some shots.
This one caught the shadow of my block of flats. Of course, they are not really my flats, I just live in them… well, I say live… Then one of the sky to the front of the apartments. Then I deleted hundreds of emails to free up space on the computer.

I was working on the blog when returned. I was overjoyed! It seemed I abandoned my inhibitions when doing this Ode, and so easily the words flowed. Of course, I wasn’t checking them, not when in a ‘Sod-Em-All’ mode.

As I got yesterday’s blog updated and sent off, and this above Ode finished… faded, and Depression Darius returned. They kept changing nearly all day, from the lowest to the highest and back again.
This wrangled me a bit. At least Horis was there for the Odeing session.

Winwood Courts end car park at the end of Citrys Way. Note the lack of the small red car on the chevrons? 
The same direction, but higher up, catching some of the balconies of the flats in the picture. It came out a little lighter than it was.

I treated myself to a packet of Sticky Teriyaki Walker’s crisps. I’ve taken to these, after Ejaz said how nice they tasted.

Ejaz did the last but one call of the day. He noted I had some potatoes to bake and asked me to add them to my next order. Salt, plain yoghourt, Tandorri Masala, Chilli powder, white vinegar, coriander, and orange food colouring. So, I did! I added them to next Wednesday’s order. He’ll make me some seasoning to have with chicken and potatoes. I’m up to try that.

Got the nosh prepped and served up.
Mmm!

A day of multiple changes of mood.
Horis’s best day, I think, but with the inevitable return to Depression-Darius always following, I didn’t get the full benefit; But thanks anyway, to Horis!

Good luck to you all!

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Inchie was generally considered to be bonkers,
He thought politicians, mostly plonkers,
He once had an affair with a gal named Bren…
He’s got dementia, so he can’t remember when.
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Continued…
The lift to the hospital arrived about 12:30hrs,
and I was soon at the QMC. The driver took me in and up in the lift to the appropriate department on the second floor. 
I sat in the waiting area, on the seat in the four-wheeled walker. It only felt like five minutes, and I was summoned to an X-ray room to have the fractures looked at. I can’t remember why, but it may have been a fault with the big X-ray; they only checked the fingers and wrist fractures. They were okay, and I was signed off. I’ll be informed of a new appointment to check the knee.
I felt over the moon and was planning to see Carer Ejaz at the 17:30hr visit.
As instructed, when I received a signing-off completion card, I was to take it to the department’s waiting room desk and place it in the red container. A few minutes later, a lady came to check if it was my card and informed me that the transport had been advised of my waiting to be collected. It was about 14:30hrs.

At around 15:15hrs, a lady asked me if I’d like a drink. With the small day catheter bag filling, I exercised caution. I’ve had enough of catheter bag leakages this month as it is; they tend to occur if I let the pouch get too full. I thanked her and declined the kind offer.

Around about 16:00hrs, another receptionist came to me to ask if I was alright as it looked like I was about to fall out of the chair. (I’d nodded of) Adding, your lift will not be long now.

I got up and strolled around the floor and other departments’ waiting areas for a nosey, and to keep alert and awake. Back to the Fractures waiting area, and swiftly nodded off again. Zzz!

Waking up at 16:30hrs or thereabouts. Noticing that the waiting area had only about eight people there, compared to about 24 on my last awakening. Fell asleep again. Realising that there was no way, even if they arrived now, that I could get back to the flat in time to take the medications. Zzzz!

17:10 hours; I woke up to find myself alone in the massive waiting area, and the three receptionists had now become one. Some lights had been extinguished, and staff in their civvies kept passing by me on their way home. Zzzz!

17:35hrs: The lone lady woke me up to tell me that they would have to move me to another department, where I could wait for the lift. I was not annoyed or angry, as I fully expected a marathon wait for Hospital Transport. I’ve had this before, although it’s never been this long a wait. 

18:00hrs: I arrived in a ward corridor, and the lady explained why she was leaving me there to be collected. Zzzzzz!

Awoken by a nurse, I’m not certain of the time, because as she woke me, I could see two ambulance men approaching along the corridor.
It was pitch dark when we got out to the vehicle. Rush hour was in full flow. Two sociable types who had had a rotten shift were talking of having after starting their lift run; three more added! It cheered me up knowing that they were on their way to me, expecting to arrive at 15:20hrs, as planned, when they got the extra ‘urgent’ pick-ups called in. They had to travel to Bleasby and Ruddington, I think they said. That is why they were so late. They looked and sounded depressed, I have to say. But once I started telling them about my day, they lost their depression and as one said; That’s the first time we’ve had a laugh in weeks on this job! Hahaha! 
They got me up to the flat, after they said their cheerios, my first job was to empty the dangerously full catheter. Boy, it’s never stunk so bad, ever! I thought I was going to pass out. Haha!

I was going to get a wash and change, and Ejaz arrived about 21:00hrs. Only a short visit this one. We decided to take off the Ready-Wrap liner and straps from the legs in the morning. So I can get a much-needed shower and ablutioning session.

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I’m not keen on my transformation… here’s why…
Although no doubt there will be worse anigh,
My awareness is so bad that I can’t understand AI,
Stuck indoors, with no cleavages to descry…
I pass wind, that I need to defunkify,
No social life, probably due to my differentiae,
The Doctor tells me I have streptococci,
Why not say flu or pharyngitis? Why profundify?
Politicians do this too… they also openly lie,
Why do I have the urge to self-vilify?
Dark-Dank-Depression-Darius brings me inertiae,
High-Mood-Horis, make me uncaring — why?
The last time I experienced any contentment or fulgor…
It was donkey’s years ago, with Grizelda and Olga,
Mental & physical problems —were they my fault?
Do you think life is becoming a struggle? Arduouser?
Is it old age, decaying mind & body making me moroser? 
Discountenanced, more agitable, alarmable, panicable?
Getting older means more turbulence, wretcheder?
Querulouser, everyday tasks get more difficulter,
Then we ended up voting for Starmer!
Who robbed each pensioner & family farmer,
Starmer, the flaneur, fraudster and finagler!
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Missed off of the last blog—sorry.
Still working on the gravel path.
Last night’s much-needed and thoroughly enjoyed meal medley. Slurp, Gobble!

I rose around 0620hrs. Got the pouch emptied, and went for a freshen-up in the wetroom. The inevitable Porcelain Throne evacuation was even controlled by Constipation Conrad, which surprised me and poor Harold’s Haemorrhoids.

I was planning to get a full-works ablution session after Ejaz called. Including a shower, I’ll ask him to remove the legging straps and liner from each leg and foot. Ask him to put them back on on the next visit. (Which he kindly did for me later).

On to the computer to finalise the Tue/Wednesday blog. It didn’t take too long. But I lost time looking for my reading glasses, then realised I’d left them in the four-wheeled walker yesterday.

Ejaz arrived, and I was a smidge concerned for him; he was his usual self today. Ejaz was like a different person this morning. My EQ told me he was upset or uptight about something. He said, ‘No problem. ’ He issued the medications and removed the leg straps and liner for me. Then checked the Health Check figures were correct, and he took them for me. I hope he regains his usual spirit later. He departed, and I got ready for the shower and ablutioning session. 

A grand job was enjoyed. Just one teeny-weeny cut shaving, the teeth and gums didn’t bleed at all. 
I did the medicating of the private parts. After I’d cleaned the wetroom and put on the protection pants and slippers. Then used the aftershave and body fresheners on myself.

The only problem was that after I hung the towels on the dryer and returned to the computer, I could not find my reading glasses again. I returned to the wetroom, convinced I’d left them in there, but no luck. So, I searched the computer/junk room.
I thought I’d looked everywhere, spending 15 minutes searching, but couldn’t locate them. 
Back at the computer, I had another search for them, with little hope and some confusion. 
I searched through 20 pairs of old glasses, hoping I might have put it in with them during a seizure. It took me ages, trying on each pair in the hope of being able to read… But, No!
I made a third search of the wetroom.
I took so much time that Ejaz returned for his 13:00hrs call and pressed the intercom to get in!
I returned to the computer to put it in freeze mode… And saw the glasses on the counter in front of the landline phone! Unbelievable! Mind you, I was obviously struggling to find them with no close-up goggles on. They are thin black-framed specs, and I’d put them on the black spyglass—perfect camouflage! I did feel a fool!

Ejaz was still looking a little down and didn’t respond when I tried to cheer him up. Ejaz gave me Peptac, a Codeine 30g, and then Ejaz barrier creamed, phorpained, and foamed my body areas in need that I could not reach without too much pain or causing Dizzy Dennis to arrive, almost in silence. I hope whatever is bothering the lad can be cleared up. Bless him.

The sky changed with streaks of incredible clouds.
The view got a little misty after that.

I went to investigate what to have for my meal.
I opted for a ready-made meal.

Then things took a turn for the worse, computer-wise. An HP message came up, “Do you agree to HP altering your hard drive? Not the foggiest idea why, but I do know the computer is not in good health, so I’m going to click ‘Allow’ and finish this blog early to get it posted. It may well be my last one. Then, I’ll post the blog quickly, and turn it off and on to see if it still works, or not.

FINGERS CROSSED 

TTFNski Each

– – – – – I loved this one! – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
Suicide? I’ve resisted all acquiescences
Over-eating: What are my chances
 What foods? I’m full of indecisiveness,
Marmite, baked potatoes with extra-strong cheeses,
Shortbread biscuits, keilassa, smoked hostages…
Sorry, Starmer, that should be smoked sausages,
Wandering eyes, keen on cleavages…
Which can have some disadvantages,
Dagger eyes, a smack in my gob are discouraging,
Nice thick thighs hold a dangerousness,
I try not to ogle, but I think this is wise.
Cause it does bring out the gagger-eyes,
I get excited, have to rest on the chaise,
I used to take the wrong medicine doses,
Now it’s the responsibility of Carer Ejaz,
I blame Starmer & his accomplices,
Thighs remain on my list of appetencies,
I crave to stop my obscurity & ambiguities,
Toilet on time? I’ve no control over my incontinencies,
The neurosurgeon anticipates my neurathenias,
I must no longer air my pathetic grievances,
My cartillages, Arthur Itis or my Charlie Horses,
Stop my self-pity, & curses,
Laugh at ex-barrister Starmer’s perfidies,
Oh, and order some more nebulisers,
Try to listen as Herr Starmer mythologises,
In an effort to impress & get backhanders,
I give up my hopes for a UK ptochocracy…
I’ll try to forgive Starmer for his profligacies,
His lies, conceit, and his peccancies,
Stop worrying about HMGs justices,
I’d love to have something that stirs my juices,
A cuddle, compassion, hopefully some petrissages
Free myself of my inconsequentialness,
To regain a degree of my past indomitableness,
Maybe, try to accept my ineffectualness, 
But hang on at all costs to my equitableness,
Am I going insane? Will I give up & join the quitters?
Can I cope with any more of life’s helices?
I’m surrounded by so much inhumaneness,
Or has inhumaneness changed? I see the difference,
Compared to when I was fit & had youthfulness…
Logicality, hope, awareness and sensibility,
One thing I’d like to see go, specifically…
Is my late-life depressionability!
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –

Not such a lot on today. I ran out of time. Had to get it done, though. Tomorrow is a big day for me. The visit to QMC Q-HOCA3 Hand-on-Call Fracture Clinic. Wednesday 22-October-2025 at 13:30hrs. With Ms Alexia Karantana, or one of her team. Sometimes delays can occur, and you may be seen later than your appointment time. Any ongoing delays are posted on a television in the reception area. If you become concerned about the delay, whether it is on screen or not, please locate and ask a team member for an update. 
We have measures to keep everyone safe in our hospitals. (How is a tape measure going to help?) 
If you have Covid, cold or flu-like symptoms, or diarrhoea and vomiting, please do not attend the appointment. Contact your booking team (Who? Where?) to rearrange the appointment.

Check our website (https://www.nuh.nhs.uk/patients-visitors) for the most up-to-date infection prevention and control guidance.
If you are unable to access our website, contact your booking team at the number below.

Your Outpatient letters are going Digital! We will text you from +447860 039092 with a link to view your letters. You can choose to still receive paper letters and opt out of this service. Currently, not all departments are going Digital, so you may receive a mix of paper and electronic. 
To cancel or change your appointment, contact us on 0115 9249924 ext 93040.
Bring this letter to the appointment. If you have, as requested, a Carer with you for someone with Dementia, please tell a member of our team. 
If you need a translator, please advise our booking team ASAP. 
To help you prepare for the visit and be safe in our care, visit: https//www.nuh.nhs.uk/patiebts-visitors

Travelling to our Hospitals:

Please use public transport if possible due to limited parking availability. 
Medlink’s Park & Ride bus service is available from Queens Drive or Wilkinson Street. This drops off at QMC & City Hospital.
A tram stop is available at QMC. Further information: http://www.thetram.net 
A limited number of Blue Badge parking spaces are available at both Hospitals.
Payment for parking is via the pay & display machines. Card payments are accepted. Cash payments are limited.
Parking Charges: QMC/TC: http://www.nuh.uk/travel-to-the-ropewalk-housewww.nhs.uk/city-hospital. Ropewalk: http://www.nuh.nhs.uk/city hospital. If you are on a low income or are in receipt of certain benefits, you may be entitled to help with the travelling costs to receive NHS treatment. Enquire at the QMC General Office. City Hospital’s cashiers’ office or the NHS Treatment Centre’s Main reception.
For more information about getting to our hospitals, including maps: http://www.nuh.uk/getting-here
If a medical condition prevents you from using public or private transport, call Hospital Transport at 115 919 4477, extension 89708, two weeks before your appointment.
When coming to your appointment, bring a list of your medications. Names, how much and how often you take them. Glasses & hearing aids. Your up-to-date mobile phone number.
If you are using Hospital Transport, you may be picked up, so you must be ready up to three hours before your appointment time. Also, you may have to wait up to three hours for your return journey.
I have to be ready from 11:30 for my 13:30 appointment. Getting home could be a long job. So, I’m not blogging tomorrow; I might not even get this one done in time. Messy!
Got to get everything sorted to take with me, finish the ablutions, then get something to eat.
I’ll see if I can get time on Friday to catch up.
TTFN.

Handwashing

Tea

Evening mug

Afternoon tarmacing progress,

Early Food Delivery

Wednesday Morning.
No stand-alone blog available.
Due to spending so long at the hospital.

06:10hs; Woke up and got up without any resistance from the body or brain.
Took the Health Checks early, but it was not too good.
I’ll try to get some updating done, but I’m not sure when I’ll be able to do it and post it.

I spent an hour gathering things needed to take with me and listing them so Ejaz can make sure I’ve done it right. I could not find my shoes. I’ll ask Ejaz.

The Ocado order arrived. I made some daft mistakes on this one, which seems par for the course. I swapped the catheter to the other leg, the left one, which needs access to the surgeon, and the leg started bleeding when I took off the top strap.

Ejaz arrived, and boy, if ever someone was a saviour, he was this morning. He got my protection pants on. Took a second HC check and recorded them both. He found my shoes for me and got them on my feet.
Did a quick body check and barrier creaming session, then issued the medications.
Checked the list of things in the sit-down-on four-wheeled walker for me, all okay. 

I thanked the lad, shook his hand, and insisted he have a nibble and drinkie in thanks for his help.

He is coming later to do the laundry. I’ll hopefully be at the hospital for I don’t know how long, and as they warned me, there may be a delay of up to two hours to wait for the lift home. My wait this morning was from 11:00hrs to 0130hrs!

Got this done up to here.

From then on, I kept emptying the catheter bag to make sure it just might last long enough… which of course it won’t. So with any luck, there will be a loo for me to empty the bag in while waiting about, and not take a dizzy-tumble when I have to bend down.
It was a crying shame I could not afford for Ejaz to come with me to the hospital.
TTFN.
Just about to switch off the computer, and realised the catheter bag was leaking!
On my long shirt, socks, shoes, and the carpet!

It was leaked from the top connection, and the bag around the exit valve had split open!
What a mess! And with the transport likely to arrive at any time, there’s no point in calling the nurses. They would not have arrived in time. I rang Warden Deana, who came up just as I’d fitted a new day catheter – but I paid the price of all the bending. Dizzy Dennis, Confusion Konrad, Shaking Shaun, and the mini-seizures started.
I was in a right pickle.
I checked the new setup; it seems to be leak-free. Just ‘Give-it-time’.
I have to be one of the unluckiest twits in Nottingham. Maybe further afield. Tsk!
TTFN.

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
I considered this morning, it was time I abstained…
From life, hard enough, is making me addlebrained,
I grow more physically & mentally, totally drained,
With so many problems that can’t be solved,
Old ones, new ones get me so aggravated,
Computer mysteries, CorelDraw, nothing gets alleviated,
Blue screen, my hard drive memory terminated…
Imminent failure, it can’t be ameliorated,
Think my bank account might be being pilfered,
Plans, hopes abandoned and or distorted,
Is my sanity being manipulated…
I am so very depressed and frustrated…
Promised help is never allocated,
I’ve never been so beleaguered!
I’ve never been so bumfuzzled, flustered,
I’m full of anguish, melancholy and misery, 
Pathetically self-pitying, life now has me shtupped,  
I used to be a social dizzard…
It’s been donkeys years since I last Kvelled,
I think it must have been while being lactated,
My brain was sharp and uninhabited,
Now I find it’s got dementia, & been watered,
At the clinic on the 22nd, I might get Trephinated,
I always seem worried, fretting or wherreted,
Whatever my fate, it’ll just have to be accepted.
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
I fear the worst shortly. Sod all is getting done in my efforts to get help. The appointments and lifts for them keep changing, despite Ejaz doing his best to sort and arrange them for me. 
Into the valley of life, the idiot limped.

Colourful this morning.

Early morning view.

Problem after problem with the computer again.
Google changed things and confused me.
Grammarly stopped working.
Hearing aids packed up again!

I tried to get Grammarly to work again. Clicked on the use Google option – and got a screen…
Huh!
Went back and pressed the other options.
Nope!
Turned everything off and restarted.
Then tried again…
Lost now.

Two hours of further failures.

Then the .
It was a District Nurse to examine the leather-skinned leg and ankle skins.
She found that the lesions were bleeding when she took off the right leg’s bandage. Deciding to put on two different ankle and leg straps on both legs.
Asking if the Carer can take them off every morning, when you need to have a shower or wash your feet in a bowl. He can put them back on at his next call. My first thought was that with winter coming, I’m going to have a few cold periods without socks or straps on. She left a guidebook on how to put the ankle and straps on and take them off.
Cover
Left/right thigh instructions
Left & right toe & foot
Arm & wrist
Care instruction details.
Leg, Ankle & Foot.
All fitted.

Ejaz spent too much time trying to sort out a lift for the Neurology visit for me. Bless him.
It took us hours, and we got refused in the end.

Then he tried the Doctors to find out about the flu and COVID-19 vaccinations, t see if they were still coming to me for it. They aren’t!
After all his efforts, we still can’t sort it out.

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
Going to sort something to eat now.
Potato nuggets, sausage, garden peas, Milk Roll bread, and a Lemon & Lime yoghourt.

= = = = = = = = = = = =
TTFNski!
= = = = = = = = = = = =

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
NOT SO GOOD THIS WEEK!
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
Last night, I tried to learn to be a sky-reader,
I was advised on how by my new Grim Reaper,
I felt like an augurer, clairvoyant, an astrologer,
It was so easy for me to become a prognosticator,
Messeger flowed to me, informed me, without a palter,
I felt as if I had become a  psychic, a sibyl, a visionary,
My seeing future events could not have been clearer,
Like I was a prophet, druid or soothsayer,
A psychic, a haruspex, a wisdomed sage, a heralder,
A fortuneteller, mind reader, or a druid-soothsayer,
Hypothesiser, prophesier, seer, diviner, foreteller,
A theurgist, pishogue, sangoma, or an oracler,
The clarity of the details could not be lucider,
Grim’s system could not be any user-friendlier,
“Read the sky only when you suffer paranolia”…
“Do it straight after you’ve had a seizure!”,
“Best when you just listened to Starmer”!
“This’ll empower you to be a prestidigitator”,
I asked him if he meant a wizard or a conjurer?
“Well, no, but they’ll all of us, to get rid of Starmer!”

I did all he suggested; it helped my being agnosticall.
After a seizure, EQ on form… this is apocryphal…
The cloud formations spoke to me, spoke antithetical,
Clouds took turns in advising me; there were many.
Each forecast was doom-ridden, at the least, melancholy,
Each of the coming failings, due to Starmer, you see,
One pointing out Starmer speaking lies, anecdotal…
Unscientifically, qualitative and circumstantial,
I moved up to contact the planets, and was able…
Pluto only spoke of things like faith & hagiography,
I did get a forecast, though, out of Mercury,
About my visit to the neurologist on Wednesday,
Water on the brain, but my hippocampi…
Would soon be killing off my bit of memory…
I didn’t know it would get personally advisory?
To cheer us up, Starmer will lose his grip, Pluto says,
He will be forced out of office, in a mental haze,
He’ll return to his barristerisationings,
But end up on the streets, selling dodgy aftershaves,
This Ode is one of my worst ever, most horrendous…
I’ve just reread it, and I’m feeling bilious!
I thought I was known for my broadmindedness,
This effort is basically cockamamie, inferior, unstudious,
Grammarly-deficient, dissatisfactory, & ludicrous,
It seemed to have such fun, wit, and good ideas,
I now read it, and found it to be disceptatious,
paid me short visits,
But visits were exiguous,
Although his visits were by far the shortest,
They brought me joy; they were conspicuous!
This ‘Sod-’em-All’ mood, known for its ephemeralness,
Gives me a feeling of ephemeralness…
I love Horis’ killing off Darius’s efficaciousness,
Yet guilt lingers, not a part of Inchies…
Fretting, worrying; yes, not bothering is erroneous,
But gawd-strewth, it feels great, and that’s the truth!
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –

I stirred at around 04:00hrs. Tried to work out what was needed today. Realised I’d only had two hours kip, in the c1966, £300, second-hand charity-shop bought, crumb-containing, odour-retaining, Harold’s Haemorrhoid-testing, nauseatingly beige coloured, non-working, virus-breeding recliner. And was soon back in the land of nod, with sweet Morpheus.
I stirred for the second time at 06:00hrs. A reluctance to rise lingered, but was soon shattered by the imminent start of a rear-end movement. Good job that I was in the recliner, which was much easier and quicker to get out of than the hospital bed. I had a mild panic attack as I stood up too quickly and all but lost my balance. Then grabbed both sticks and dashed, well, that’s not the word, more, sort of hobbled and limped hastily to the wet room. I made it with seconds to spare. The pants I tore off, and I’m glad I did, if I’d faffed about taking them off, I’d have been in a right mess. No need to clean myself, my legs, or the floor this time, as is often the case, I was ‘Seconds away from disaster!’ Then I realised that I’d dragged the nocturnal cather bag with me, but no or damage to report.  I emptied it into a bowl and took it to the WC for disposal. It was an excellent colour for once. The lightest it’s been for many a month. As I I put the computer on, the . Off to the hallway to press the button to admit Carer Ejaz. Chimed out, and Ejaz came in. He was in good form this morning. The broken knee, and and were medicated. Medications given. And a body check was carried out. He was concerned about my going on my own to the hospital on Tuesday. Although the hospital recommended I take a Carer with me, the lift Deana arranged is for up to 3 hours before the appointment time, with a warning that I might have to wait two hours for a lift home afterwards. (NHS Transport). The Carers could not provide anyone at short notice. I’d hoped things would work out, and I got an Easy Link lift, then it would have been okay. It’s always a good idea if I can take Ejaz because, like with the dentist, he knows about my teeth problems. I couldn’t hear what the dentist was saying, so Ejaz answered and remembered what they told him I should do.
So, I hope I can hear and understand any questions I get, and can remember what went on in the hospital… a lot of it is already just a blur.

Sorry, just had a seizure with terrible after effects.
Waiting for help to arrive.

I’ll put photos on now if time.
Mega full, but so light. It soon darkened.

Tea.

Barrel replenished.

Planned a meal with tomatoes. Make some sarnies, and chips maybe? I’ll see how things go.

Couldn’t eat it all. I ate all the chips, though.

Not feeling very good now, no single thing in particular. CBD: Concentration, Balance, and
Dizziness. With intermittent dollops of Toothache Tiffany, coughing, and Shaking Shaun episodes.

I woke up after 4 hours kip, with the identical afflictions… plus Diarrhorea Diana really took a hold in the morning. With the CDB ailments, I felt terrible. And the hospital appointment due on Wednesday too. Plus no Carer available to go with me… not that I could afford it anyway. Tsk!

Now Grammarly has stopped working!
Clicked to sign in; “fail; mess Bad gateway?”

Tried in the morning; Same results.
Cannot get any help!