Satire

Inchcock Today Thu 3 Dec 15: Gloomy day in many a way…. Hehe!

/ Inchie / 4 Comments

Thursday 3rd December 2015

Didn’t stir until gone 0600hrs – that would be due to me horrendously busy day yesterday and having to stay up far longer than usual with the late GP appointment and walking the dark streets back up the hill to the flats to get back.

WC’d and found Little Inchy once again covered in sticky blood – cleaned him up.

Made a cuppa and got the laptop on to finish yesterdays diary off. Bad day and good day in some ways yesterday was. I got to see Fooey at me sisters, got an unexpected late appointment with the GP and hobbled back to the flat in the dark wearily up the big hills.

Not feeling too great this morning mind – not as mobile as I usually am and it’s preventing me doing everyday tasks that involve bending. Never thought I’d say that… Hehe!

More meat flies appearing in the flat again?

Spent far too long on the web.

Had a bath to try and shake missen up a bit and into life, then decided to force missen out and have a walk into Sherwood to use me money off vouchers at the co-op.

P1020570Little Inchy was painful and bleeding again and the stomach rumbling once again, as I set off out of the flats and called at the Community shed with some more mail for Margaret the previous tenant.

On up into the park and down to Mansfield Road. Pedestrian cyclists in abundance.

P1020571Into Sherwood and the Co-op store. Bad news… they have stopped baking the Beetroot & Apple bread!

Swines!

Pottered around and spent me required ten pounds to claim me £2 off voucher.

When I was leaving the store another dizzy spell came. Oddly it didn’t get to me like normal… no that’s not right, what I meant was I accepted it as being normal and expected now.

P1020572On up and down to the park gates, a few yards up the hilly footpath and I had to stop and put down me shopping to get me breath?

Never had that before with such a light load?

On me way back to the flat I remembered the GP telling me to get me thing ready for going into the hospital on possible short notice.

P1020574So when I got in I sorted me things into a big bag and stored it in the rubbish that needs sorting room (Bedroom).

Think I’ve got everything in there, shaving tackle, toothpaste and brush, carbolic soap, jammies, socks, undies, dressing gown…

Sat down for a cuppa and drifted off into the land of nod again… for hours! Woke with Little Inchy in a mess, legs swollen summat awful, stomach churning and an instant dizzy spell – it must have been comical seeing me try to get up without toppling back again. You’ve got to laugh! Then tottering over to try and turn the light on. Hehe!

Thought soup would be the best for nosh tonight. Had me luxury beef and veg soup, added some Bovril and a tin of died potatoes and slowly slowly warmed it through, stirring all the time. I put a beef pastie in the oven to go with it.

P1020573Got it all done, and had two of me cheese cobs I’d got from the Co-op with it and a banana. Took me medications.

Feeling a bit rough as I did, I wondered what made me cook this load of nosh in the first place?

Still, I actually did eat most of it, despite me rumbling innards.

No message email or phone call from the GP surgery.

I didn’t do any cleaning up (Naughty!) afterwards, but watched some Sherlock Holmes DVD episodes. Well I say episodes, I kept falling asleep and rewinding the same episode ‘The Scarlet Claw’ – never got to the end of it though… Hey-ho!

Inchcock Today Wed 2nd Dec 15: Visit to Jane and Fooey – Doctor, out late for me, messy day!

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Wednesday 2nd December 2015

Water retention in legs – Dizzies & Little Inchy Bleeding etc.

Woke at 0430 hrs in need of the WC again, Little Inchy bleeding merrily away and stinging a bit.

I’ve had permission to visit me Sister Jane hubby Pete and cat Fooey last  night when she phoned.

Made a cuppa and took me medications. Checked me bag to make sure the nibbles and pressies were in it to take with me.

On me second trip to the porcelain a massive dizzy came over me – actually worried me it lasted so long. Must drop off at the GP on me way back and sort out an appointment cause they haven’t answered me email.

Finished Tuesdays diary and posted it – went to make another cuppa and another dizzy overcame me. Don’t like this at all.

Must have a bath at 0800hrs so I have time to get ready afterwards and catch the L9 bus into town. Don’t want to disturb me lovely neighbour before then.

Had a shave to save time later when I take me bath.

P1020559Me legs are still swollen and misshapen?

Did some WordPress work and then made another cuppa.

The last dizzy seems to be lingering with a very mild disorientation continuing after the initial attack… oh I like that description, I must use it when I eventually get an appointment with the GP.

Not heard anything from the building society, solicitors or Steve of Age UK, who said he would ring yesterday with updates on the house sale.

Gorra shave and bath and things ready and went down to the Community Shed to hand in some more letters received for Margaret the previous tenant. Nobody about so left some nibbles with the letters on the table.

Blooming windy this morning out here.

Back to the foyer to listen to the other tenants out of the wind as they gossiped away. Handed some nibbles out like.

Got into town and was soon on the number 7 bus out to West Bridgford and Janet’s home for a visit.

Got off at the wrong stop (Fancy that!) and walked to the domicile.

FooeynA nice cup of tea was presented to me and Fooey came out to seem for a bit of fuss.

Marvellous animal.

Jane, Pete and I had a jolly decent natter and I gave them their nibbles and treats.

I got a newspaper they had read in return. Hehehe!

I decided I’d call at the GP on the way home to make me appointments being a they had not replied to me emails.

This meant catching a different bus from town, dropping of en route to Carrington at the surgery, then either walking or catching a bus afterwards into Sherwood and walking up through the park to the flats. (That was the plan…)

Said me goodbyes and set off to the bus-stop – and was soon in the City Centre… where I forgot all about going to the doctors Humph! and had a stroll through the streets while having 40 minutes to wait for the L9 bus, that I shouldn’t have been catching anyway.

P1020562   P1020561Not many folk about in the slab square, the nosherys were not doing much trade. The Ice rink had a buxom well-built lass who worked in the rink, skating in short sleeves to show off her muscles and tattoos.

P1020563The food stall near the mini Helter-Skelter was giving off some nice smells, but no busy at all.

Ostrich, Reindeer and Kangaroo was on the menu.

Didn’t appeal to me though.

I walked up to the Victoria Centre and P1020564wandered down towards the L9 bus-stop, window shopping on the way.

The Nottingham pedestrians again showing their lack of interest in the difference between red and green lights.

Bless em.

P1020565Further on I espied some jewellery I thought might interest the gals on The Troll Free Zone.

They were in the second-hand jewellers shop and being older seemed to be more costly than the new to me?

Hope you can see the prices.

P1020566Got to the bus stop and waited a good while for the bus to arrive, then we set off. As the bus passed by Clinton Street I took a photo down it.

Even that street was busy today either

Then I remembered I was supposed to be getting the other bus to the GP surgery. What a plonker!

Got back to the flats and WC’d (Relief!), then checked on emails to see if they had made me an appointment at the surgery.

While doing this I got some mail delivered. Two for Margaret, to for me. Mine was some Asda bumf and me INR results, next date and dosage record.

So I emailed the doctors asking to book an appointment for next Monday for me Warfarin Blood test, and asking if they had made me an appointment to see the doctor about me water retention, bleeding Little Inch and dizzy spells. Maybe I’ll get a reply this time?

Still waiting.

Had a look at the available nosh and decided on a steak pie and beef slice with curried beans for nosh tonight would do me.

Just got it cooking and an email came in from the Doctors surgery – if I could get there quickly there is a cancellation appointment and Dr Vindla could see me. Answered it in the affirmative and  rushed about getting missen ready ASAP – made sure the cooker was off, taps and lights and made me way down and out, walked up through Woodthorpe Park while it was still open.

Soon realised I’d gone out and left me hearing aids in the flat. Tsk!

Hastened best I could to the bus stop on Mansfield Road, boy were the blown up legged giving some hassle!

Caught bus to the surgery and limped in out of breath. The Doctor saw me in a couple of minutes. What I love about Dr Vindla is she doesn’t faff about and gives it me straight.

Told her about little Inchy and she took a few prods pokes and examined the poor thing. “I’m a bit concerned about this” (So was I).

Then told and showed her me legs asking if I could go back onto the water tablets. She quipped “No, if I put you back on them again with all your other medications you might not complain ever again!” I got the coded message alright.

Then asked about the dizzy spells and she told me “There is nothing I can do about them! You’ll have to cope”.

Then she told me to wait outside while she rang the GUM clinic.

So I did.

She came out to me a few minutes later and told me they would ring me tomorrow with instructions/appointments. I asked the receptionist if it would be possible for her to email or message me on the phone instead of ringing and me possibly not understanding what is said. She said she would, instead of ringing.

P1020567Off into he night and walked back to Sherwood.

Then with the Park being closed, had to struggle up the Winchester Street hill and back to the flats.

Well shattered when I got in.

WC’d and thought about putting some of me Arthur Itis pain-gel all the way up and down me legs as well as the usual knees to ease the agony that they treating me to.

Decided not to, if it gets bad again during the night I’ll keep a tube of gel nearby to try.

P1020569Made a cuppa and rewarmed me rather unattractive looking pie and beans, then while waiting, got the laptop on for updating this and took me medications.

As I went into the kitchen to clean me pots and cooking accoutrements, I glanced out of the window and saw far away in the distance just one house out the thousands that had some Christmas P1020568lights outside, blue they were.

Titivated the kitchen and tended to Little Inchy.

After a day of running around (So’s to speak) I was well-drained.

Got into me jammies and sat down to read the paper that Jane gave me… Zzzz!

Inchcock Today Tue 1 Dec 15: Damned Dizzies!

/ Inchie / 2 Comments

Tuesday 1st December 2015

Woke at 0415 hrs in need of the WC, Little Inchy painful and belting out blood and needed a lot of attention to stop it this morning.

Horrible night again, spent more of it awake than kipping. Tsk!

P1020553Laptop on and finished the Monday diary.

Took me medications.

Regular visitations to the bathroom throughout the morning.

Had another dizzy spell and decided to email the GP for an appointment to tell her about these returning.

The Morrisons order arrived, got the frozen in the freezer but ended up with too much to get into it – left the others in the bags in the Hallway.

Got me laundry ready and took it down and got it in a machine. Expecting the Iceland order too later, so stayed downstairs outside the laundry room so i could see him arriving. Took me bottles to the bank down the road.

P1020554Ask a lady arriving to do her washing if she wanted me chips and ice-cream I couldn’t get in the freezer. Went up and fetched it for her – she had taken out me washing from the drier for me and I’d left me bag upstairs so fetched it. Good job the lifts were working today.

A bloke arrived wanting use both washing machines, me first enemy made at the flats when I said he was not supposed to use both at once.

P1020555The Iceland man cometh and delivered.

The lady told me to take me chips to the lady in flat 52 on the ninth floor, so I did.

Then got me nosh on and put away me clobber, and stored the fodder.

Laptop on to update this.

P1020556Got me nosh, and what a nosh too!

3 Potato pancakes (Two inside cheese cobs), sticky chicken on sticks thingies, chicken nuggets, carrots, peas, sweet potato chips and tomatoes.

Ate the lot of it!

Checked on email to see if I’d had any reply from the  doctors but no.

P1020558Tired to renovate the plaque I’d brought with me from the old place. A mate who I worked with when he had freshly arrived from Kingston, went home on a visit and brought me this back as a thank you.

I nicknamed him Tony and he stuck with it. I wonder where he is now?

Had another dizzy.

Sister Jane rang on the land-line. I can go visit them in the morning but I must get there before 1100hrs. So I got the bag ready with the nibbles and treats, made sure me bus-pass was in me pocket – oh, and while doing this I found the Co-op card I’d lost. It was in me new sleeveless jacket pocket. Huh!

Little Inchy had been bleeding again.

Sat down after cleaning up from the nosh preperationing and put the TV on – surprised that there was much on that I fancied looking at… fell asleep…

Newly Identified Medical Sydromes

/ Inchie / 9 Comments

Newly Identified Syndromes

Named Disease: HAJ (Had-a-job) Syndrome

aa03MSSymptoms: Being made redundant through no fault of your own, suicidal feelings, lack of food, and the disappearance of respect.

Most at Risk: The proletariat, anyone not related to a banker or a friend of a Politician, the unemployed, the millions of immigrants both legal and otherwise, the impecunious, the uneducated youths of today, and the educated youths of today without rich family connections.

Area’s most affected: The North – Midlands.

Named Disease: Spooninthegobatbirthness Syndrome

Osb07Symptoms: A snottiness and uncaring attitude develops that cannot be countered. The bank balance and overseas investment accounts increase exponentially.

Most at Risk: Royalty, Aristocracy, Politicians, Footballers, and the Right Honourable George Osborne MP (Conservative)

Area’s most affected: The rich 10% of the population.

Named Disease: A.A.D.(Alcoholic Addiction Dysrhythmia) Syndrome

aa03MS2Symptoms: Finding you have not got any alcoholic addictions, and the concern and worry you get about being so different to everyone else. A.A.D. syndrome is often claimed by alcoholics and West Ham fans for their failure.

Most at Risk: Those under the age of eight, and more mature liars.

Area’s most affected: Nursery schools, MOT stations, 

Named Disease: Monetary Cystitis (M.C.) Syndrome

aa03MS3Symptoms: It is extremely painful, nigh on impossible for you to repay money owed by you, forcing the sufferer to short change and overcharge whenever possible. Also builds an inbred hatred of Bank Managers, Loan companies and Old Age Pensioners.

Most at Risk: Pensioners, Politicians, Dentists, Lawyers, Bankers, Haliburton, George Osborne, Claret Appreciation Group members and Taxi Drivers.

Area’s most affected: Nationwide.

Named Disease: Hope Alopecia  (H.A.) Syndrome

aa03MS4Symptoms: A sudden realisation that all hope is lost, other than for the War Mongers, Politicians, bankers, Car Mechanics, David Cameron, Nigel Farage, Haliburton and other nepotistic clans.

One person definitely not suffering from this Syndrome is UKIP’s Nigel Farage. Campaigning in a seat where Labour “should weigh the vote”, Mr Farage said that his party is “taking big numbers” of Labour supporters making Thursday’s result “very very tight”. And with young and older voters both warming to his message on immigration and borders control, Mr Farage revealed that he had new evidence that the Labour vote across the country is collapsing because of the Corbyn effect. He produced polling evidence by former Labour leader Ed Miliband’s ex-adviser Ian Warren which he said showed 50 per cent of those who voted Labour in the humiliating general election defeat in May will desert the party. Humph!

Most at Risk: Everyone not connected with the above.

Area’s most affected: Anywhere with any businesses still owned and ran by English management, so as you can tell, these are scarce.

Named Disease: Compassion Deficiency Anaemia (C.D.A.) Syndrome

aa03MS5Symptoms: You couldn’t give a toss about anyone else.

Most at Risk: Most predominant in Parliament, and Lawyers offices, although likely to be found anywhere.

Area’s most affected: Virtually throughout the world.

Named Disease: Cacospysy Syndrome (C.S.)

aa03MS6Symptoms:  Irregular pulse, concern and worry that the government will find your stash of undeclared earnings from illegal practices of varying secretly ran companies. Panic attacks at Government Budget announcement time.

Most at Risk: The poor and the dodgy types.

Area’s most affected: All of the UK and FIFA representatives.

Named Disease: E.D.D. Early Decrepitude disease

aa03MS7Symptoms: Sudden realisation that the poor are getting poorer, and the Rich are getting richer, and you are one of the poorer. Urges to dress up in fancy dress and join WordPress might affect them. Memory loss and bodily function controls are common amongst these syndrome sufferers.

Most at Risk: Those who are poor and getting poorer.

Area’s most affected: Worldwide: In the event that you should feel or find any of the above symptoms coming on, do not consult your Doctor who will be too rich to be bothered to understand your frustrations and problems. In the event of your becoming disinterested in money and valuable items, Danny Soz (19¾) can be contacted for help. You could consider suicide, alcoholism, hibernation, or becoming a Politician. But best not to worry… your Doomed. Most E.E.D. sufferers end up not knowing the difference between the syndromes anyway, then read up on them and forget they did.

Inchcock Today Mon 30 Nov 15: Wet rain, GP, Clinic, Dizzy spells and bleeding… Tsk!

/ Inchie / 2 Comments

Monday 30th November 2015

Woke at 0345 hrs in need of the WC, Little Inchy not bleeding so bad this morning. Horrible night spent more of it awake than kipping. Tsk!

The rain had stopped at last, and the temperature was 55ºf.

Made a cuppa and took me medications, stomach rumbling again, but I put that down to me nibbling all day yesterday and not having a nosh.

Put me INR dosage card in me coat pocket so as not to forget it later when I go for me Warfarin level blood test.

Put me Lumix camera on charge, then took me morning medications, put me midday ones in me bag.

01W01Misty and raining heavily now – and I’ve got to walk to the GP surgery later, then go to the clinic to have me bumps and lumps checked.

Still, despite every thing I found missen singing again in the bath… Adam Faith and Billy Fury songs mostly, with the odd Rick Nelson and Nat King Cole thrown in.

Two nosh deliveries coming today. Morrison’s any-time now, then Asda tonight.

FooeyGot an email from Sister Jane in reply to mine, Fooey is not doing very well and she is expecting the worst. Poor old Fooey, made me so sad. I asked if I could go up to see them, no reply yet.

Made a start on the laptop and finished yesterdays diary off. Emails, messages and started this one-off.

No Morrison’s by 0845 hrs so I looked at me diary. It’s tomorrow when it comes not today. Tsk!

Out and caught the L8 bus into Sherwood as it was still belting down with rain and a bit windy with it. Dropped of at the bottom of the hill and walked up Mansfield Road and down into Carrington to the GP surgery.

The Obergrupperführer nurse was on duty today. But she doesn’t scare me like… WPlie

Had me test done and left feeling guilty after receiving a telling off about me weight, eating Brassica and going out in the rain?

Out and over the road and caught bus to the clinic (Well soaked again) – in and out in minutes today. Two doctors were off sick and I got another appointment.

P1020547Caught the bus into Mansfield just for the sake of it. Got some of me crossword book done e route.

Rained all the way and got even heavier when I got into Mansfield bus station.

Through the puddles under the subway and out into the shopping centre.

So many leaks coming from the roof I dare not get me camera out in the subway.

Called into B&Q to see if they had any bargains but no such luck, then I wandered up to another store and got some bread and tinned green beans.

P1020548Came out and took this rather sad photograph with the rain, closed down premises and lack of shoppers in the Mansfield City Centre.

 Had a whopping dizzy spell as I went down the steps onto the road.

Stood around holding onto the railings for what seemed like ages for it to abate, probably only a few minutes though. Decided to make me way back to Sherwood and the flat.

Walking to the bus-station in the rain is a blank in me memory?

Got the bus (Bless me free pensioners bus-pass) and felt a lot better.

P1020546Dropped off in Sherwood and an L8 came within minutes and lifted me up the hill to the flats.

Got in and WC’d (Relief!), hung me clobber up to dry out.

Made a cuppa and took me midday medications a little late but still.

The Asda delivery arrived with the usual substitutions on it.

P1020549Got me nosh ready, put me potatoes to bake in the oven, gave the 40 minutes then added the Cottage pie with sweet potatoes for 20 minutes, then popped me last Frikadellen in the oven with the others for ten minutes. The sweet potato-shepherds pie could have done with a bit more time, but I was so hungry I ate everything anyway. Added me carrots and peas from the saucepan, buttered, salted and peppered the baked spuds, added a sprinkling of vinegar and had a lemon yoghurt afterwards.

Drifted off to kip – woke up needing the WC urgently and had another dizzy.

Not a bad one, but it bothered me a bit having two so close together, not normal that.

Washed the pots up and titivated the kitchen but still felt tired, sat down to watch the TV and did so… in between dozens of dozing offs! No idea what I watched now, or rather tried to watch.

Kept waking up distorted and aching in places I didn’t know I had? Hehe!

Inchcock Today Sun 29 Nov 15: Ostentatiousness from the seagulls?

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Sunday 29th November 2015

Woke at 0310 hrs in need of the WC.

Cannot recall any dreams, ‘Little Inchy’ bleeding needed attention again, passed wind and nearly choked missen! Phwoar!

Laptop on to finish yesterdays diary off.

Kettle on and made a cuppa and took me medications.

After hours on the laptop I got a bath and freshened up.

P1020545Getting light properly now and the rain and wind is a-blowing!

Felt oddly tired and fell asleep when I sat down to have a cuppa.

Woke up hours later confused as to what day it was, time it was and where I was – for some reason I thought I should have been on a bus?

The stomach began churning once again, and I was nibbling nearly all the day… worms?

Listless a had a read of me book.

Went to make a cuppa and to me amazement outside the kitchen window were several seagulls. They were swooping at the window, I think one to two of them clouted the glass with their beaks?

Went to get me camera but they had gone when I returned. Alfred Hitchcock has nothing on this place! Haha!

Did very little of worth or value today at all – moped, read, watched TV… idle sod!

Took me medications and spent hours trying to get off to sleep.

Hey-ho…

Some of Inchcock’s Annoyances last week

/ Inchie / 6 Comments

Some of Last Weeks Annoyances

aa03MS

The hearing-aids hid themselves, once again,

Lost me Co-op card, another pain,

Little Inchy bleeding and leaving a sticky stain,

More laundry to do, but I don’t complain,

Phones Steve Age UK, BJ and Sister Jane,

None of them answered me, all calls were in vain,

The solicitor lied to me once more, they’re inhumane,

My confidence in them now disparaging and slain,

Fire alarms two, the lifts broke down again,

Of mending me heating, the Council are uncertain.

–

Thursday I dropped me dinner on the floor,

Bent down to pick it up hit me head once more,

I went the NHS drop in centre to get cream for the sore,

But they had closed down, so went to the chemist for some more,

The bleeding must be stopped that’s for sure,

The chemist applied a ligature,

Yet this day there was to be more!

Shame on my part, as I broke the law,

Fed the pigeons, got a right lecture like never before,

To the policeman for mercy I did implore,

He let me off, and I went home feeing guilty and furthermore…

Fell over in the bedroom right onto the floor!

I just don’t care any-more!

DSC00091

Inchcock today Sat 28 Nov 15: Some sorting done at last

/ Inchie / 8 Comments
P1020538

The Moon refusing to go away this morning…

Saturday 28th November 2015

Woke at 0400 hrs, WC’d, checked the temperature, a decent 57ºf this morning, made a cuppa and took me medications. Felt tired still for some reason, old age I suppose?

I’d been dreaming but could not define exactly what took place just knew it was related to running and chasing again.

Laptop on started this tosh off.

Facebooked a bit, then WC’d, made another cuppa and tripped up and went over in the bedroom when looking fer me clean bath towels. Luckily I fell on a pile of bags with clothes in that are waiting to be sorted – and made no noise to disturb me neighbour either, with the soft slow-motion landing I had. No injuries lumps bumps or cuts… apart from feeling a fool! Hehe!

Got a wash and shave and into me togs.

Out to catch the L9 into Arnold and get some Anya potatoes ’cause the craving for em came back.

Great chin-wag with the other residents waiting for the bus.

P1020539Dropped off at Sainsburys petrol station and waddled in and got two bags of me spuds – not very buy for a Saturday and I was out in time to catch the next bus back to the flats. Bad news, they have gone up to £1.50 a small bag.

WC’d then got me potatoes on the boil slowly.

Got me things ready and did some laundry to catch up on the pile I have still to do – having forgotten to take one of the bags with me last Tuesday. Tsk!

Out to the lifts and they were out of order, both of them.

P1020541    P1020542

So I popped down the twelve flights (24 really, two for each floor) of stairs and into the lobby on me way to the laundry room… guess what? The Fire Brigade were here again – this time in numbers and talking to someone in the lobby and looking unhappy about whatever it was they were doing. I assume they have turned off the lifts for some reason. Possibly a follow-up from the activation yesterday?

P1020469None of the other tenants heard any alarms?

Cleaned the machine and got me washing into it.

Then back up the stairs to the flat, definitely harder than coming down from the flats. Hehe!

P1020540Checked me spuds doing nicely. Then I put on another pan with the rest of them in it, and me carrots in another to warm them up later.

Cleaned the kitchen floor and it was time to go down the 24 flights of steps to the laundry room and get me togs into the drier.

Brigade chaps still milling about.

Togs into drier and back up the stairs to check on me spuds.

Somehow I’d turned off the rings when I put the new saucepan on? It’s not easy being a pillock yer know!

One more down to the laundry room with me bag to put the togs in. I was surprised at how well I coped with the stairs, and Arthur Itis was good about it.

Took me togs out and folded them – I acquired an odd sock in the process.

My next door flat lady arrived as I was leaving the lobby, now free of personages and the fire engine had gone from outside.

As we got the now working once again lift up to the flat she told me she had suffered her computer being hacked by someone demanding money not to destroy all her files!

She had taken it to a computer shop and they told her they can remove it in time, the git said she now has 2 days to pay-up. I hope the shop bloke was right about sorting it for her.

P1020544Into the flat and checked me spuds, done nicely, turned off the heat and left the lids on for later.

Really enjoyed me nosh tonight. Baby carrots, pickled beetroot and egg, sausages, Anya potatoes and chestnuts. Rated this one 9.54/10.

Sorted some togs out I’ll not need – owing to the shrinking… or right, owing to me getting fatter! Taking them to the Nottingham Hospice Charity shop next week. Might drop them off on me way to the GP on Monday.

Had a look on Facebook for a bit, then decided to settle and watch a DVD – what a decision that was, it took me so long to decide which to watch it was dark! Ended up watching some episodes of Sherlock Holmes from the 1930’s.

Getting to sleep took ages and ages. Then kept waking up regularly. Tsk!

Inchcock Today Fri 27 Nov 15: Help arriving today – no, I take that back…

/ Inchie / 4 Comments

Friday 27th November 2015

Woke at 0245 hrs, I’d been dreaming and waking up all night – the dreams were all of the same theme but totally different situations: I was searching for something in each dream but someone or thing was stopping me getting to where I wanted to search… an undertaker who looked like Spike Milligan was hiding papers as I tried to search on office, then he became a judge wearing a helmet and sentenced me to join the Conservative party as chauffeur to one of the MPs?  That was in the last dream I think. Bits from earlier ones all seemed to have me searching on rooftops again?

I could feel the lower regions damp, so went to the bathroom to clean up ‘Little Inchy’ again and have a session on the porcelain. More washing to do again now too!

I came out of the bathroom, put the kettle on and thought I could hear music? Odd that I thought at 0330 in the morning?

P1020529Went to the door tracing the music, P1020530opened the door to find it was the fireP1020532 alarm belting merrily away.

I went into the kitchen opened the window and awaited the arrival of the brigade to get a photo of them.

The first tender arrived. The lads got out casually and wondered into the foyer to check the fire-panel I assume.

One of the officers even looked up to see if he could see any flames – or he thought I was being cheeky pointing me camera at him? Hehe! Probably the second reason, cause none of them called at the flat to check.

The second tender arrives with great haste.

The third didn’t come near enough for me to get a photo of it, as it turned around behind the garages and departed whence it came.

Bit of excitement to start the day, P1020533bonkers dreams, fire brigade now, what will be the third thing?

Me tea had gone cold so I made another.

‘Little Inchy’ was sore so after they had left I called in the bathroom to check on me pads I’d put on Inchy and found I’d left the hot tap running in the sink! So, no hot water or bath today for me! Huh!

Took me medications and got the laptop on to finish yesterdays diary off.

The ulcer was a bit easier this morning, well a lot easier actually, Anne Gyna calm, reflux valve too, the blister on me finger from burning it taking out me nosh from the oven yesterday had come up and burst nicely, the toothache has lessened, Arthur Itis was lingering but not too bad, no dizzies at all and the temperature in the kitchen was up to 60ºf. Things looked good, a bit worrying this!

The tummy started rumbling a bit later, but nowhere near as bad as the last two days.

Checked me emails and comments.

biGladysGot onto some Facebooking. TFZ’s Suzieann’s birthday today, on with doing a graphic for her up there in Scotland. Took me while and the flipping Coreldraw started playing up cause I was using so much memory in creating this, but I was pleasedish with it, just hope Suzie likes it.

She’s a lovely witty gal and suffering at the moment with having her eyes treated. Hope she has a marvellous day.

Got a good bath and titivated missen and called at the Community Hut on me way to walk into Sherwood.

No one in again, so left the mail or the flats last tenant Margaret on the desk with some nibbles.

Tried ringing Steve again on the way, got an answer this time. He’s going to call round later bless him.

Walked up to the park and down onto Mansfield Road and left down into Sherwood and called at the Co-op shop see if they had any bargains and get me bread. They had some potato letters at half-price so I got a bag, along with a TV paper and me bread. Couldn’t find me co-op card – add me losing the letter from the Nottingham Building Society and I’m now waiting for the third thing to lose today. Tsk!

Came out search me pockets but could not find me Co-op card!

P1020536I noticed some residents at the bus stop so a bus must be due to catch back up to the flats.

Here they are, I showed the photo’s of the fire tenders from this morning. Two knew nothing about it, but this chap who has good hearing heard them and got up to watch.

P1020534We all had a natter, not much time as we were only going three stops – but it was all uphill.

We all got in the lift had a joke and departed.

Into the flat and to the WC – glad to see I’d not left the heater or light on or tap running! Sad innit?

Put me potato letters in the freezer. Made a cuppa and sorted some paperwork as I searched again for the NBS letter to show Steve of Age UK.

Without any luck. Tsk!

Laptop on to update this while I awaited the arrival of Steve.

Started a graphic using Corel Draw and Corel Paint for the TFZ gals.

Got missen in a pickle – Photopaint won’t close and Draw will let me close it until I exit from Photopaint? Oh ‘eck!

Ended up crossing me fingers and force-shut-down the laptop.

Steve rang later, he’s too busy to come but will call the NBS on Monday to find out about the house movement.

P1020537Had me nosh and took me evening medications.

Potato letter waffles, carrots pork pie, sausages, tomatoes and beetroot, followed my a pot of mandarins in orange jelly.

Got the DVD on the TV sorted a bit now, thanks to advice from Duncan Robertson – so watched the last two episodes of the ‘Life on Mars’.

Tried the laptop to see if it loaded alright and it did. Just hope that Coreldraw works when I next use it.

WC’d, then decided I’d watch some TV… the usual story, spent 10 minutes picking out what to watch and fell asleep within five minutes of putting on the set. The anaesthetic qualities of TV programmes are much underrated ain’t they?

Inchcock Today Thu 26 Nov 15: Things gerring a bit better…?

/ Inchie / 2 Comments

Thursday 26th November 2015

P1020527

No snow, no ice, no rain as the day lit up

Woke at 0600 hrs, still feeling bitter about FraserBrown (The amateur mock-Solicitors) mucking me about.

WC’d, made a cuppa and took me medications, remembering to take the extra Warfarin. Then realised I’d already taken them last night – a good Whoopsidangleplop start to the day!

Took ages finishing yesterdays dairy off, the ages on Facebook catching up.

Several cups of tea later, I started this one off, then got missen ready to go to the Clinic – bath have etc.

Want to go feed the ducks today if I can get ready in time and the clinic visit is not too long like.

So I’ll gerrof and prepare missen then.

TTFN.

All ready, bus-pass, camera, clinic cards, wrapped up warm, stomach settling and off I go.

P1020520Off on the L9 into town.

Nottingham pavement cyclists were rampant today.

I wondered down into the City Centre and wondered around for a bit taking photographs as I waited for the time arriving to nip up to the clinic.

P1020523The Christmas stalls were attracting the attention of the local ladies.

This stall selling well overpriced ladies accoutrements seemed popular.

I wanted to tell the girls that they could get the same stuff they were selling for £5 and £8 from the Pound Shop P1020522around the corner.

The German food stall was busy preparing the food on a giant rotating dish in the middle of the stall. I must say it smelt lovely.

If I win the lottery later I might be able to afford to buy some of there meats.

P1020525I must be feeling a bit better methinks, cause when I saw the sign hanging up on the stall that said ‘Olde English sausages – the noticed the Robirch Sausages bag they had just emptied onto the grill, I  felt like telling them that Robirch sausages are Irish made, not English, mind you they are great tasting though.

I wandered up to the clinic and noticed more Nottingham Pavement Cyclists buzzing through the crowds and scaring some of the old folk. Swine!

I got there and handed me letter and card to the receptionist. She read them, frowned and asked me why I was attending today and not in January as is me usual appointment time?

“Because the letter you sent me” I says… “Told me to come today at 1245hrs!”

She glanced down at he paperwork again, tutted and said nothing other than she pointed to the benches and commanded me to take a seat. Which I did.

As I waited I thought how lucky she was – if she was to lose her job through being thick, arrogant and uncaring, she’d walk into a job with FraserBrown pretend solicitors, fit in perfectly she would! Hehehe! Bitter still, Me?

A lady with a wonderful smile called me into the treatment room and was most helpful and understanding. (She wouldn’t stand a chance of getting  job with FraserBrown We-hate-Clients Solicitors at all)

She even explained why they cannot replace me inner plastic bit that went discoloured. She said it so nicely I was happy they hadn’t done it just for the opportunity to talk to her.

As I left someone else was getting an earful from the receptionist, who I think noticed me smiling at this? Oh dear, I hope she’s not on duty in January, she might remember me.

P1020526Another Nottingham Pavement Cyclist nearly got me as I walked through town on me way to the Canal to feed me ducks.

Outside a pub on South Parade an ambulance was collecting a customer and gently getting him in the bck of the ambulance.

P1020521A police officer got in with him?

On down Wheeler Gate I plodded, more pavement cyclists but they were too quick for me to gerrum on film.

I walked through the Broad Marsh shopping centre and called in the DVD shop to have a nosey around.

They didn’t have owt to tempt me with though.

Along to the Pound Shop, where I got carried away. Found they had just two pairs of the fingerless gloves with matting on the inside left, these are great when your fingers freeze, cause they help me keep hold of whatever I was holding at the time the fingers froze… if yer follow me like. So I got them, then saw they had tinned steak so I got one of them, a pair of long socks and a stylus pen for using on me mobile.

P1020517Then poddled to the Heron Store and got some bread.

Out and across the road to the Canal bridge… where a group of youths stopped me and asked if I was local, each had a clipboard and I said “Are you?”

It could have got interesting as I noticed the sneer coe on his face and the others closed in. But the traffic lights changed then and I could not hear what he was saying o wandered off pointing to me hearing-aids. Wonder what they wanted, survey or selling summat I suppose?

P1020519Got to the bridge and it was getting late, so I thought I’d drop the bread down off the bridge to the ducks.

I was amazed that there were so few birds there today. A chap stood watching me told me they had done a cull last week, he saw them doing it.

That’s not nice.

P1020518I wandered back into town to catch me last L9 bus.

Getting busier as the day went on in town it seemed.

There are now three saxophone player street artists on the stretch of road from slab square to the mall.

I thought I’d caught one in the photo above but missed him. You can see h equipment on the floor on the left though. (Failed again!)

P1020524Plenty of traffic about as I approached the bus stop.

Got on the bus and at a later stop the chap form the 4th floor of the flats got on and we had a little natter.

Nice chap, he’s the one who usually tells me a story from his passed, but didn’t today.

Got in WC’d, put me bits away, made sure I’d got the right medications ready and laptop on to update this load of waffle.

P1020528Got me nosh ready. Frikadellen, pulled pork balls, sweet potatoes in batter, beetroot in vin & orange, baby carrots and bread thins.

Followed by a banana, mandarins in orange jelly – there was to be a pot of orange yoghurt as well, but that had gone sour when I tried it, uergh!

After much hassle getting the DVD to work on the telly – I fell asleep watching it.

Kept waking up in between weird dreams, until 0300hrs when I had to go to the WC to tend to normal functions and clean up ‘Little Inchy’ who had got excited and started to bleed all over me. More flaming washing to do again! Tsk!