Old, sick, weary, but harmless. I need to make others smile!
Inchie: A Messy Wednesday 20 May 2026
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – Today consisted of various upsets, problems, bothers, frustrations, periods of depression, moments of pathetic, and self-annoying self-pity. A couple of moments, mainly when the damned new Windows 11 was confusing, or the new CorelDraw 26 play-ups and anti-Inchie activities took so long to work out how to proceed, and in some cases were skirted around, without the slightest hope of my remembering how I got through that particular problem. Of course, each and every one would return later. I was regularly self-distracted, not coping, confused, panicky, incapable, unlucky; even bewildered at times.
There were a few times that I felt almost blas’e, as I decided there was no point in going on. Convinced things are getting worse, harder, more difficult each and every day.
All I did for the majority of the day was struggle with the computer and clear accidental wet-room problems.
I think I just moaned about my problems to each Carer, and felt guilty after each grumble about my miserable, ever-failing, mental and physical lifestyle.
I just read the above. I felt bad for writing it. Sorry!
But I’m sure I’m getting rather pitiable. I wish the Doctor would recognise my problems.
Then again, if she were to, it would mean being referred to the suitable department in the NHS. Wait for an appointment, as with the neurologist who took six months. Then I was assured a lift had been arranged back, but told to cancel the appointment as they cannot do a lift there. So if I were to live long enough to get help, I’d have to sort help from the Carers to arrange a lift, get the money to hand to pay for it there and back, then get me dressed on the morning of the day.
No, sod-it, not worth the bother & hassle. – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – I’d shout for help. Is there any point in going on about my deteriorating confidence, interest, and increasing depression, frustration and increasing ailments? I believe things started affecting me mentally after the fall revealed the TBI. Two of my Carers have kept me going, and a feeling of concern has been shown. But they are coming less often now. So many people are far worse off than I. Hence, the guilt returns. I’ve not been this low before. By this afternoon or tomorrow, things may perk up? 😂 – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – Just thought I’d mention them. Hehe! – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – FOOD GLORIOUS FOOD A FEAST OF FODDER IN STOCK NOW!
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – WATER AS WELL AND THE OVERUSED TOILET PAPER – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
By Inchie
78 years of age, pretty ugly, short, bald, pot-bellied, in ill health. Decaying physically and morally. Mechanical ticker valve, Duodenal Donald, Saccades-Sandra, Arthur Itis, Hernia Henry, Hard of Hearing Hank, Bad eyesight Boris, Reflux Roger, Peripheral Neuropathy, Nerve Neurotransmitters Not-working Wendy, Bladder Cancer Chris, Stuttering Stephany, Haemorrhoid Harold, Shaking Shaun, Dizzy Dennis, FND, ... there are others, but I've tired myself out, now! Hehehe! Oh, then I had a stroke! Now awaiting Cataract & Glaucoma operations. Diabetes 2, Leg-Ulcer-Ulrich, Cartilage Chloe & Carole and am flat-bound. Tsk!
Failures, Accifauxpas and Whoopsiedangleplops are my Forte... Hehehe!
I love making folk smile when I can. TTFNski!
It’s odd how the definition of self-worth can morph as we get older. I see why you want to hold out as long as you can, live on, and retain some semblance of agency. I’m not sure what the answer is, or if there even is one.
In keeping with your consideration of others being in worse shape, I sometimes find myself comparing my own existence to those who perish every day who likely would have contributed far more to society than I ever will. Though I’d be remiss if I didn’t recognize that my ability to reflect, empathize, and consciously try not to do harm is already more than can be said for a large swath of people. Suppose the comparison, then, is awash.
I still think you’re better off trudging forward, Inchie. I hope they’re able to properly figure out your ailments and allow your natural abilities some air to breathe for the last legs of your golden hour.
Worrying, Paul. I can’t believe the Doctor has not responded, and we got the email to send it via the receptionist. I just took a tumble (half-hour go), mate. My kitchen floor has now got the slow cooker and lid, boiled potatoes, a bit of blood, and garden peas scattered all over it. Oh, I’ll take a photo for the blog. Tsk!
Cheers.
Oddly, the surgery rang me a few minutes ago. Telling me the blood tests for renal and Warfarin are calling Monday this week… no, next week.
I wanted to tell her about the Catheter flowback & blockage, after reading up on how dangerous they are. She said something I did not decipher, and rang off. It’s the absence af antibiotics and pain killers worrying me a bit. I do not know if the new good ones will be permanent or not, and they have taken Codeine off my prescription list. Argh! I tried to order some Co-Codamol from the chemist, but he asked tons of questions, and has not confirmed my order. Picklewarts!
Cheers mate, all the bestest!
It seems to me all the processes of help are in actual fact hindrances.
Your day sounds really bad, Gerry, and you still managed to post a blog post, take some good photos and have a nice meal. Keep doing the best you can. 💖🙏
It’s odd how the definition of self-worth can morph as we get older. I see why you want to hold out as long as you can, live on, and retain some semblance of agency. I’m not sure what the answer is, or if there even is one.
In keeping with your consideration of others being in worse shape, I sometimes find myself comparing my own existence to those who perish every day who likely would have contributed far more to society than I ever will. Though I’d be remiss if I didn’t recognize that my ability to reflect, empathize, and consciously try not to do harm is already more than can be said for a large swath of people. Suppose the comparison, then, is awash.
I still think you’re better off trudging forward, Inchie. I hope they’re able to properly figure out your ailments and allow your natural abilities some air to breathe for the last legs of your golden hour.
Best to you. Keep your head up.
Cheers for the wonderful wish for me. 👍
Sounds dire on the pain killers, hope the crash gets sorted out.
Worrying, Paul. I can’t believe the Doctor has not responded, and we got the email to send it via the receptionist. I just took a tumble (half-hour go), mate. My kitchen floor has now got the slow cooker and lid, boiled potatoes, a bit of blood, and garden peas scattered all over it. Oh, I’ll take a photo for the blog. Tsk!
Cheers.
Oddly, the surgery rang me a few minutes ago. Telling me the blood tests for renal and Warfarin are calling Monday this week… no, next week.
I wanted to tell her about the Catheter flowback & blockage, after reading up on how dangerous they are. She said something I did not decipher, and rang off. It’s the absence af antibiotics and pain killers worrying me a bit. I do not know if the new good ones will be permanent or not, and they have taken Codeine off my prescription list. Argh! I tried to order some Co-Codamol from the chemist, but he asked tons of questions, and has not confirmed my order. Picklewarts!
Cheers mate, all the bestest!
It seems to me all the processes of help are in actual fact hindrances.
Your day sounds really bad, Gerry, and you still managed to post a blog post, take some good photos and have a nice meal. Keep doing the best you can. 💖🙏