Dicacious Inchy: Friday 30th August 2024

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SD CARD FOUND STUCK UNDER RECLINER! The last two lines added
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TODAY HAS BEEN THE WORST EVER FOR DEPRESSION
I’m sorry, but things are getting gradually worse.
The insurance company has cancelled my policy for some reason. Carer Kara told me not to worry weeks ago when they sent a letter telling me I had not paid. Kara had sent the month through the bank, as she is my official representative.
Now it seems I have a different Carer, who can’t talk to the bank, and muggings here can’t get through because I’ve forgotten how to do it. The new catheter is a night and day, mare.
Concentration is taken over by worrying.
I have had the odd moment of feeling easier, but that only comes when I give up and think silly things.
Not in good shape at the moment.
I’ve not done many photos.
The electric shocks have lessened after yesterday.
Carer Precious. Carer Maryham. She helped me get dressed after checking the body for marks and ointmentating the chest and ‘other’ areas. She helped me put on the Yaohuole gown, put the old one in the laundry bag, and took it down for me as she left. Bless her.
I was not feeling down at all; in fact, I was high.
Later, Carer Joanne called with a training Carer. She was Carer Šelin. Nice gal. Listened to Joanne’s instructions.
I was then even higher, singing.
Then, later, Carer Chris arrived. A letter from the insurance company had been delivered. This is terrible news for me. How the hell can I sort it out now?
I’ll do my best. I’m struggling.
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Not a lot, but clear.

First view.

Guess where I went…
Not that I was too bothered; I’d sank a little.

Second photo.

While up, I got the pander peas podded.
I shelled them and put them in the pan with some demerara sugar, and this time, I used ordinary salt.

Lack of concentration.
Fed up. I wrote a terribly sour ode, but I am unsure if I should publish it on tomorrow’s blog. It is a cry for help, I think.
See how things go the morrow.

I was sorely tempted to start on the booze again.
I’m sure I will soon. That’s how bad the depression is getting to me today. Bad!

When the seizures started, I couldn’t have cared less. Dark thoughts milled around.
Self-pity and loathing at the same time.

I’ve no idea why I put this on? I took it weeks ago.

No memory of taking these four, but it looks like I did them all at the same time; it may have been before I got the spuds in the oven on a low heat for later.
Beautiful!

And stayed in there for about three hours!
I may have to have instant mash later. Tsk!

Tried to catch up with the blogging. I’d spent so much time being depressed, coping with seizures or emptying this ridiculously tiny day catheter pouch.

If I recall correctly, I was going to check on the state of the spuds and got distracted by the changing sky.
The spuds were left for another hour and a half before I remembered about them!

Went to salvage what I could.

A slight altercation getting the spuds out of the oven.
The meal didn’t look attractive.
A vegetarian one this time.
But it tasted good to me.

After Carer Chris had departed, I washed the things, put them away, and took these sun-setting shots.
Looked a little like a water painting job.

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TTFN