Inchies November Whoopsiedangleplop selection.


Tuesday 1st November 2016:

Bewilderment, befuddlement and bemusement Whoopsiedangleplop day!

I dropped the pot of tablets, bent down to retrieve,

Knock off the antacid bottle, it smashed made a mess,

And it took me two hours to clean up, can you believe,

This was 0400hrs, just the start of the day’s stress!


Wednesday 2nd November

Not a successful day!

Needed lip-salve, extra pain killers and panty liner,

Harold Haemorrhoid bleeding badly,

Aggravation from Duo Denal and Anne Gyna,

Little Inches’ lesion was bleeding too, sadly!


Thursday 3rd November

PC World Fiasco

Called at PC World to ask about the being mended laptop,

Asked an assistant, a 6’4” vacant looking ankle-snapper,

Got told more lies and misled, will PC World ever stop?

And it felt like dozens of visits to the crapper!


Friday 4th November

Nosh Whoopsiedangleplop

Sourdough bread with the Frikadelles & mushroom,

Added to the Pasta tomato sauce with herbs, looking tasty!

Eating it, and had to rush to the wet-room,

Dropped the lot on the floor with being so hasty!


Saturday 5th November

Wet-room Whoopsiedangleplop

Painful, bloody, every single WRHD session,

The bowels offered only pain and suppression,

Depression was looming,

Well, that was my Impression!


Sunday 6th November

A slow, slow day

Rumbling Innards, dizzies and yet,

Hunger pangs emanated from the gullet,

Had a bean stew, black, red and flageolet,

Spend an hour or so on the toilet,


Monday 7th November

Storage Heater stopped working

I informed Obergruppenfurheress Deana,

She wasn’t happy, judging by her demeanor,

She had a look and informed the works department,

Told me they would send me a heater,

They would repair on 30th a long time to wait,

So, I had to order myself an oil-filled heater,

From Amazon, that turned out a self-defeater!


Thursday 10th November

When I started the computer, a black screen with the message “H/9485.455UW26 Out of range” came up? I turned it off and on again, and things seemed alright? Oh dear!


Friday 11th November

No heater yet

Had to use the static heater in the living room,

The loan heater was not going to arrive I assume,

Bent down to turn this on for the first time it would seem,

I treated the bruised head with Germolene.

Saturday 12th November

Fell off the stool!

Working on the internet, I managed to fall asleep,

Tumble to the floor, it was rather steep,

I leant back you see, forgetting I wasn’t in a chair,

I think I said at the time Bleep bleep bleep! 

Amazon delivered the heater, to the wrong complex,

I had to fetch and carry it, I was feeling very vexed!


Sunday 16th November

A bleeding awful day!

Cracked lips, Haem Aroids, even Little Inchy,

Bleeding away, and the lower regions itchy,

Even the face came up swollen and blotchy!


Monday 21st November

Tumble and being conned again!

Fell out of the recliner, falling on the floor,

Via the now broken Ottoman & feeling rather sore,

Email from Amazon, a ten-pound voucher I saw,

But to use it, I must purchase more,

The customer service was very poor,

Won’t use them again for sure!

Visited the surgery for INR test, all was well,

Then called at the clinic, wrong date, oh hell!

To PC world to be conned again as well,

Got all uptight with them and a nasty dizzy spell!


Wednesday 23rd November


Walked into the electricity box on the wall,

Slowly I think I crumbled to the floor in the hall,

Broke me left hearing aid and glasses in the fall,

Olive’s Malcolm arrived, couldn’t have timed it better at all,

Came around with me in the chair feeling despair,

Malcolm had kindly put me there,

He’d bought, and built me an office chair!


Thursday 24th November

Busy day

Checked the list of tasks-to-do, and decided in this order: 1030hrs L9 bus to town – Sourdough bread from Tesco – To the opticians to get glasses mended – Audio clinic for batteries and tubing (so I can repair the hearing aid I broke walking into the hallway electricity cupboard) and bus to the GUM clinic. then fetch the Betamethasone Corticoid Cream.



Sunday 27th November

Another tumble

Had a hobble up to Mapperley and the Aldi store,

Coped very well until on the way back, near Holly Tor,

Crossing the road, I tripped, tumbling to the floor!


Monday 28th November

Marathon Hobble

I had a marathon hobble today, 4 miles and more,

To the City Hospital, then to Bulwell and the food store,

Felt so proud of myself, feeling I could have done even more,

Afterwards, there was not a part of my body that wasn’t sore!


Wednesday day 30th November


The Nottingham City Homes repairman came,

To investigate and the heater and repair,

Took off the cover, spreading dust over everywhere,

Moments later he said, all done so there,

It had tripped out and I’ve reset it again

He asked for the loan heater so he could take it back,

I said; It never arrived, it never even came!

The storage radiator never did work again!

The zip on my trousers broke too!


I contacted Deana two days later when the radiator still wasn’t working and she said the NCH Repair team would be with me in four hours to sort it.

They never arrived!

United Carpets

British Gas

PC World

And now, Nottingham City Homes are all worthy of my contempt.


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