Last night I collapsed into tiredness and kip really early – about 1830hrs. Woke up at 1225… no 0005hrs and made a cuppa and started work on me blog and posted one, checked emails, did no-end of graphics, Facebooked and read some blogs over the next seven hours… amazing but I expect to collapse early again tonight.
1020hrs: I am now going to struggle get my socks off and ‘ave a scrub down, do me teggies, shave, shampoo and a sh… Then struggle to get me clean socks on. Then put me pile cream on, then rub in me Painphor cream on me knees, then search fer me bus-pass, midday medications, hearing aids, glasses and get ready to go out and take some piccies fer me blog – well wrapped up of course (that’ll be me not the blog well wrapped up).
Do yer know I’m losing interest at the thought of all the bother now… Tsk!
Forced missen out of the house wandering if I’d forgotten summat like…
CPO’s Investigate – I know not what
Noticed two CPO’s across the road at the Nottingham Natural Health Centre, that would be the one where my neighbour went last year, forget what he went for now, but the treatment cost him £900.
Flipping biting cold wind again.
Caught bus into town, and attempted to walk down Clinton Street to get to Primark – blimey the mass of people. Bit of a struggle getting out of the way in time of more aggressive ones.
Clinton Street crowds scared me a bit…
As I turned the corner a youth belted passed on a bicycle nearly hitting a lady nearby. I did my usual and shouted “If yer too scared to go on the road yer shouldn’t be on a bike… I added a rather colourful word at the end descriptive of what we all have n out breasts.
Still to be expected this time of year I suppose.
The queue wot I joined before me injuries…
Got to Primark and boy was it busy, and dangerous too? Yes!
I hobbled around and bought some really thick long sleeve t-shirts, another pair of long johns and joined the queue.
See photo. Good job I had plenty of time.
As I exited the pay area a woman knocked her pram into me left arthritic knee, stopped talking on her mobile to say “Sorry duck” then continued on her phone as she walk away. Bless her I thought.
Then, as I approached the escalator to go down, a bloke rushed in front of me treading on me left foot! Bless him I thought.
I still managed some slow but nifty footwork to avoid (Just) the store detectives as they chased after one of Nottingham’s multitudinous shoplifters out of the store.
Came out £39 pounds worse off, and limping a little more than usual and walked into town wandering if there was an Iceland shop in the City Centre where I could get those egg and sausage muffins on offer at 89p… I bravely approached a CPO and cheekily ask if she knew of one. The look that said “What the #uck are you asking me for” came over her face as she said “No”.
Bulwell Market looking a bit sad I thought
So I decided to go to Bulwell again to the Iceland there – of course I could also feed me mallard ducks and pigeons at the same time.
The market in Bulwell looked rather sad today. (See picture)
I hobbled to Farm Foods and got two loaves for a quid to feed the sucks with, I’d already got the birdseed with me from home.
Then into Iceland and got the muffins and very nice they are too!
Another dumped shopping trolley today
Out and down to the rivers… to be greeted by the horrible sight of another shopping basket dumped in the water!
Suddenly I remembered I wanted some of the smoked cooked ham from Fulton’s Foods.
So I walked back up the main street to the shop and searched but they didn’t have any smoked ham in, so I struggled (The bags were weighing me down by now with all the stuff wot I’d bought like) around looking for any bargains but found none.
As I started out to feed the mallards, a woman on the disabled scooter came out of shop and was on her mobile phone – only the alertness and agility of those nearby prevented her from hitting them.
I wonder if it should be an offence to use a mobile phone when driving a mobility scooter? They can’t dock driving licence points because the idiots who drive them without concern for others do not need a driving licence, or tax, or even insurance by law.
Just a thought – perhaps I can interest Lynton Cox in starting a campaign? He’s good at that sort of thing… maybe not.
Me friends, the Mallards and Pigeons welcomed me with open beaks
So I waddled back down to the river… I think they are beginning to recognise me now cause I was greeted with much honking and quacking by the mallards, and the pigeons amassed in my vicinity – one of them must have liked me cause it anointed me hat with his pooh!
Bless him I thought.
New hat needed now… Tsk!
Pound shop after Christmas methinks.
Caught the bus back to Carrington and dropped off on Hucknall Road.
As I turned the corner the local pigeons spotted me and came down to be fed – but only the few seeds left after feeding the Bulwell ones – I bet they thought “Tight sod!”
Got in and put me togs and food away.
Made a cuppa and had couple of biscuits and set about finishing this diary off.
Faccebooked a while – finding a message from Mike Steeden that some shop is selling thick vests at £3.99 until Friday! Just my luck I’ve just bought 3 for £6 each from Primark today!
Tsk, Huh and blabboozlekins!
Did a bit of blog reading, checked emails and began to fade…
I’ll try to do some graphics but me eye-lids are gerrin’ heavy now.
Hope I can stay awake long enough to eat me Sausage and egg muffin later.
Unfortunately this feeling didn’t last long. So sad. Coreldraw still playing up and Inchy feeling down”Well depressed Now!
0315hrs: The usual being shocked into waking-up experience again this morning – instantly wide awake accompanied by a feeling that something is wrong?
WC.
Thought straight away about what I could try to sort the Coreldraw not working problem out. Nothing new came to mind, depressed I wandered down and put the kettle on. Started the laptop and got the cream form the fridge and ent up to tend to the ‘Inch’. Oh dear… the swelling is still declining but the blood was flowing again! Thank heavens for kitchen towels. Stopped eventually.
Angina playing up and for the first time in ages my ulcer joined in with other complaints! Tsk!
I opened Coreldraw9 in vain hopes, and got the same message, whichever option I clicked, just like yesterday I got the Error message then it told me Coreldraw9 has stopped working. This time I tried clicking abort again – and it started and was usable for a while?
I am now going to close it and try again to see if still works…
“An unexpected Error occurred please restart Coreldraw” message when I tried to close it down?
It closed down on its own accord!
I tried again…
For some reason I can get passed the opening warning sometimes and not others. It will not let me save a page at all?
Double depressed now!
Still fiddling and trying to come up ith a solution – for five hours now with no luck!
Still fiddling and trying to come up with a solution – for five hours now with no luck!
I decided when the radio said it was not going to rain again until early evening, to get the stuff ready for the Nottingham Hospice Charity shop and have a walk into Sherwood with it for em.
I went up cleansed myself well. Had a peep at the Inch to see if it had started to bleed again but no signs thankfully.
WC.
I set off hoping I’d not forgotten anything.
A new sign at the Chapel I espied:
Well fancy that… and I thought they were into Formula One racing. Hehehe. Oh I am feeling bitter and pissed off!
Still feeling low I carried on into Sherwood, the sky looked a bit threatening at this stage.
I called into the Continental food shop and got a small loaf of Rye bread. I thought it might cheer me up a bit – a totally forlorn hope of course. Then I realised I’d left all me coins in the bathroom so had to pay her with the tenner I had. Really cheered her up that did.
If looks could kill I’d be a gonna I can tell yer!
Only a new laptop with a graphic programme that works would do that. No chance at the moment. Clivey-boy suggested getting another graphics programme installed. Nice of him but the laptop is an old one running on old windows?
Anyway, I carried on to the Hospice shop and gave em me stuff.
As I was walking back the sky looked a bit lighter, but I didn’t feel any brighter.
Noticed the alcoholic mobility scooter maniac was at the pub again.
Hobbled along taking the scenic route and passed the flat I used to live in before moving to where I am now – Whatta mistake to maka! I was well happy there – but the landlord sold it to another and he wanted more rent than me mortgage was.
See how when things go wrong I start stewing on things? Poor twit.
I got back in the flea-pit.
WC.
Started the laptop, got me food out ready for microwaving later, made a cuppa and got me medications ready, then updated this.
But got a lot happier – Then he sadly and unfortunately became quiet a lot sadder as the day and his Coreldraw programme came to a bitter end!
Warning: Descriptive revelations of medical problems and applications follow in the diary. I Thank you.
Sprang awake at about 0240hrs – this time I realised why from the pain from rear-end haemorrhoids – I think I blew myself awake with a violent emission of wind from me anus and the pain woke me up – the aroma wasn’t very relaxing either?
I was down drinking a cuppa and on the laptop by 0250hrs. Then AVG decided it had to update – at 0400hrs it had finished updating!
Still, it gave me time to concentrate on me ‘Inch’ medicationalising. Hehe! Only the tinniest amount of blood this morning and the swelling has gone down – a pity in some ways I suppose I enjoyed that bit of extra girth while it lasted even if it was so painful.
WC.
0430hrs: Got yesterdays diary finished and posted, took me morning medications, passed wind (I haven’t stopped since I got up – but this was a serious contender for being classifiedas volcanic!) painfully and felt the warm wet sensation within seconds form me rear end. Went up and cleaned myself, applied extra cream.
The doctor did try me on the capsule thingies a while back, but I just could not get em to stay in, so I manage with the PKs and cream.
Blooming cold today.
Waiting in for me food delivery then going to go to town and see if I can get Blood Red Snow from the library or book shop if necessary. I’ll take me camera just in case owt interesting occurs. Mind you, they are pulling down the old BBC building over the next three days, the Vic Centre bus station is closed, might get a photo of that if I can get to see it when I hobble passed. Bet that causing a few frayed tempers and mucho congestion.
Morrison’s van driver just rang – he’s going to be late. Trees blown down on the A453 and an accident. Ah well, not his fault but annoying. I hope I can still get into town cause I need me little walks to encourage the ticket to keep going a bit longer and I really would like to find and read that book.
Hey-ho.
The Mail man commeth.
Letter from bank about me insurance – Letter from Inland Revenue with a little cheque returned from me tax overpayment and five leaflets for nothing I’m interested in.
Set off for a walk into town and took some nibbles for Mandy at the launderette and the staff at the chemists, dropping them off as I passed them. Mandy liked her lollies.
I noticed how the Nottingham In Bloom display was getting better. Hehehe!
Tiny bit of drizzle and the wind had died down a touch.
When I got to where they are demolishing the old BBC building I remembered to take a couple of photo’s.
I plodded on through a busy city centre in places and seemingly abandoned in others?
Got to the bank where the queues were horrendous. Being late thanks to Morrison’s (Not their fault really though) meant it was lunch time when I arrived.
A very nice lady told me to take a seat and she would be with me shortly as i was at the end of the queue?
I suppose it was me dynamic masculine looks and young body that made her help me. (Cough cough!)
She banked me tax cheque and told me about the insurance and to come back to see them when it was due again.
I like this being been nice to lark I can tell yer!
Then when I mentioned I had a Penny Bank account from 1963 that I could not access, she told she had been trying for her own customers without luck. When I mentioned the thought of appealing to the European Human Rights people – she only went on the interneat and got me the address, then printed out out a complaint form for me to use, then gave me an addressed stamped envelope to use, and then thanked me! Blimey!
Mind you she wasn’t a Nottingham gal, she wus from Manchester and commuted each day to Nottingham as she was relieving someone on holiday! Nice girl too.
Cheered up, I poddled through the town centre and went to the library and limped up to the third floor to ask if they had the Blood Red Snow book in. Another very nice lady had a look on her computer and told me they could get it from another branch for only a 45p charge and they would send me an email when it arrived!
By jimminee what a good day I was having.
I wobbled back through the town, traffic busy mind.
As I was walking down to the town, a youth banged into me as he joined his mates. Never said a word he didn’t, I don’t think he knew what he’s done actually.
And then as I crossed the slab square just in time to take a photo of it: There was a British Gas van parked with signs ‘Can We Help You’ and some tables and chairs at the side of the van, the chap there hiding in the van cause it was sprinkling with rain. I got there just as the traffic warden was giving him a ticket! Made my day British Gas being got at I assure you!
I plodded up to catch a bus, but unfortunately it started to belt down, so I dived into the Waitrose shop – fatal spending-wise that for me! But I only got some Greek style lemon mousse, so it wasn’t too bad.
Rain stopped as I left and caught the bus back to the demolition area.
Saw a couple of youths idling along looking at each car they passed suspiciously. Both wearing black hoodies.
Got in and started the laptop and made a cuppa, went to the WC put me bags away and returned to the laptop which still hand not loaded, so I waited.
Tried to download me pictures to Coreldraw9 but it froze. So I closed it and tried to open it again – all sorts of warning messages were coming on screen again when it froze again. Oh dear… I knew this was coming, the end of my graphicalistioning!
Luckily I think I can get to picture taken today before Coreldraw9 packed up.
I turned off the laptop and tried again – No!
So I turned it off and restarted again and uninstalled all Coreldraw things. And it told me to complete the uninstall I had to restart the laptop – Again! So I did.
Reinstalled Coreldraw9 again – then it told me it needed a computer restart to complete the DAB whatever that is.
So I restarted it once again.
All this must ahve taken two hours.
When I tried, Coreldraw9 stopped working again.
I tried again to run Coreldraw…
I can no longer do any graphics at all.
I am trying not to swear here.
I am so down now. At least I can get photo’s from me camera onto me blog, of course I can’t create any noe or doctor them… Huh!
♥ I was up at 0330hrs. (No choice in the matter, urgent WC attention required and I couldn’t get off afterwards Tsk!)
Usual brekkers, took medications and then thought I’d start the laptop and get on with some posts I’d nearly got ready for WordPress.
The laptop took an inordinately long time to start, I really am expecting the worst from the old gal soon. When she did get going, I lost the BT signal repeatedly.
Eventually I go both going after several reboots, restarts and complete reboot. Good old BT.
Spend far too long getting graphics ready for post later, but I did enjoy doing them though.
About 1230hrs, I did me ablutions and put me togs on, and set off I’d decided, to walk to Nottingham Hospice shop taking some bits for em again, and then to catch bus to town and go for a ride out to Derby, taking me books with me. See… I can plan ahead yer know sometimes.
As I was going up the little hill, I thought the skyline warranted a photo – hen I got the camera case out of me bag, I realised I’m left the batteries on change back in the hovel.
So, I hobbled backed to the hovel and got em um put in. Change of plan at this stage.
I had a walk into town (Took photo), and caught the round-about route bus to Bulwell. Then visited the Fultons cheapo Freezer shop in the hope of getting another pack of the cheapo but very good microwave pork sausages, and they had some in again, so gorra pack.
Then had a walk to the cheapo shop, but again, they had nowt in I wanted or fancied.
By now, me feet and knees were aching to say the least.
Dropped the things (DVDs books and a wall clock) off at the Headway Charity Shop, and bought a book, as I’d finished me Hitler the Commander book on the bus going there.
Believe this or not, but a Mobility Scooteress reversed and nearly clobbered me – I tooketh a photo, but she was well on her way by then.
On me hobble back to the bus station I called in Heron Frozen food shop to have a decker. They had some orange suckers at 10 for a quid, and Bread flats on offer at a quid, so I got one of each like.
As I was walking past the market place, a Mobility scooter came close to catchin’ me one as he went passed me and jumped off and went into the bookies… Tsk!
Caught the 17 bus back, cause it drops me off quiet close to the flea-pit.
No yobs about I’m very glad to say. Bet they’ll be out later…
As I turned into the street, the were a dead mouse at me feet! So I took a photo like.
Got in, started the laptop, put me nosh away, made a cuppa. I updated this crap, and posted it.
Did some microwave sausage sandwiches with bbq sauce, followed my an orange sucker. And ate it when I got off the WC.
Got to bed late last night, still managed to get some kip, and only one getup for the WC (No blood)
I woke up with a searing pain at the left back hand side of my jaw. I gingerly moved my mouth and a sharp pain came for the first three times I tried to move it – on the forth it dissipated, and after a while, no pain at all?
Angina, back passage, Arthur Itis, Reflux valve, Ulcer and Kidneys seemed no problem at this time.
Gorrup and started laptop, kettle on and made a cuppa and pot of porridge, then off to the WC again (All okay).
The laptop had still not started when I got back – I fear the old girl might be on her last legs. (Oh dear!)
Stopped drinking tea from here on today: as I was planning to go and see my Sister Jane, and hubby Pete. I intend to take some photos when I get there, to use in creating a hopefully funny post about the visit.
Set off to the bus stop, caught bus to town.
Caught bus to West Bridgford. Poddled around the shops and bought some vegetable casserole and a rather tasty looking Mushroom Potato caramelised onion meals that appealed.
Walked to Jane’s, via a different route than normal: eventually found my way and arrived.
We had a good natter, and I remembered to take the photo’s Jane and Pete posed magnificently for them.
Took some of their new posh ceiling lamp wot they got, and the three portraits of rams on the wall. Yes, they are of a rather higher class than wot I am yer know.
Eventually I departed, for the long long walk into Nottingham, via a route passed some old haunts.
By the time I’d gone about two miles, me feet and knees were ahurtin’, and I had to find a toilet.
I took some interesting photos though.
In town, I struggled the last few hundred yards to the bus-stop, and alighted on me way back to the flea-pit.
No yobs about, thankfully.
WC.
Finished and Posted blogs, and then just had to get me head down, I wus well shattered.
Sunday 17th August 2014
Up at 0600hrs, after actually getting some sleep in for once. Just a shame I had to knacker missen walking for miles to get it. Tsk!
Still aching a bit in places, but still, at least I got some kip in.
WC, no blood.
Hobbled down and put the kettle on and started laptop.
WC.
Made a cuppa, couldn’t face eating yet. Not like me at all?
Tiredness came over me.
Pete emailed me a photo wot he took of Fuey – their lovely 89 year old in human age cat.
Took me medications, and started to create this rubbish.
I intended to do blogging (or preparation for blogging) all day. Well, I enjoy it yer know, I’m harmless really.
Inchcock is going (Hopefully) to visit his Sister Jane and Brother-in-law Pete today. As you can see, Pete is not a fan of shavers, razors or Gillette at all. Inchcock is excited about his trip out, and looking forward to it with great enthusiasm and trepidation. The ‘Trepidation’ comes via his dream last night about wild mobility scooters on the rampage, and his excruciatingly agonising harrowing death at the hands of one of them!
1600hrs Tuesday11th August
Yobs on street. WC. Moved upstairs, read book, watched DVD, and had nibbles.
Wednesday 13th August:
More bad dreams. Up at 0500hrs. WC.
Started the laptop. Had breakfast (Medications) and a cuppa.
Blogged and emailed for a while.
Arthur Itis, angina and lower regions not feeling too bad at the moment. The reflux valve a bit bothersome like.
WC, glad to report all well in this activity this morning – No blood, No pain.
Updated this load of true baloney.
Got ready and set out to go to Jane’s house. Very busy in city centre. Caught 2nd bus out, and had a natter with Jane and Pete.
Said I was wanting to take their photo, but I lost the plot and forgot to take it. Tsk!
Caught bus back after an hour or so, and had a walk around town, then caught bus to Derby. I had a poddle about in the Eagle Centre Market. Noticed there wus a lot lot Disabled Scooter folk about – and today they were in twos!
Folk didn’t seem too happy today, but then there were plenty of yobs around acting in an intimidating fashion.
Fed the pigeons, avoiding the skateboarders belting around – bloody school holidays!
Caught bus back to Nottingham, then bus to the hovel.
Would you believe it, straight outside the house, 6 yobs swearing threatening and kicking a football about.
I brought me laptop up to the bathroom, where I’m doing this.
Didn’t want to call the police, as last time when I did, the clot of a Constable came straight to the house and knocked on the door, while they were looking – so they knew who called em. The next day I was attacked as I went out for a walk to the chemist. I didn’t see the youths as they came from behind, but I reckon it was them.
We’re a bit worried about Inchy today folks. He seems in a reasonable mood. Never mind, something is bound to bring him back down to earth with a bump. Talking of bumps, he had the one near his.. on his.. the one that appeared last month. The clinic surgically removed it last week, but he didn’t tell you about it because he was a bit embarrassed do you see. Well… the last few days really, nowt exciting enough to write about yer see…
Saturday 9th August
Oh, dear, WC visits throughout the night.
Woke up 0510hrs with cramps and fears from the nightmares I’d had..
Trundled down and put laptop on, then kettle on, then made cuppa and porridge, then took me medications… then waited for the laptop to finish booting up! Oh dear, I’m lost without me internet yer know.
Had to reboot laptop again, to get the internet going and letting me load wordpress with top bar on screen. By now, me cuppa and porridge were cold, so made another brew… While pouring it out, I had a dizzy spell, and managed to pour boiling water over me fingers. Applied water then olive oil to the tender red patches on me digits… oh, I think I swore a bit as well.
Posted Inchcock Today’s, then worked on graphics for another post.
Spent the whole day internetting on blogs and making graphics, it were grand it were.
Come early evening, I was drained mentally. (Poor old devil/thing).
Sunday 10th August
Up at 0430hrs. WC.
Laptop booted, kettle on, medications taken, WC, bowl of Grape-nut Flakes… then waited a further few minutes for the laptop to finish loading. I’m gerrin’ worried the old gal is about to conk-out… oh, lost without me internet yer know. Mind you, I might beat her to it yet.
Storms, rain and hibernation wus the order of things today.
Got no-end of blogging done again.
Monday 11th August
Up at 0400hrs, WC. (Bit of blood) A new twinge today to join me compilation of complications – stomach ache (Not the ulcer or reflux valve this time).
Laptop started.
WC visit, had to change me bandage.
Down, made a cuppa and took me medications.
Finally got me graphics finished for me ‘Inchcock’s Tips/Advice for those Approaching Old Age’ post, by gum it took ages.
I’ve been having a few more dizzy spells recently, and last night, I forgot to take me medications – this morning, no dizzies at all? Perhaps this is indicationistcal that one of me night medications might have been causing the problem – but which one? (See what a keen diagnostic mind I have today?)
Went up and dun me teggies, washed me tootsies, had a good shave, washed me horrendous torso, applied me Dermatological cream in the require places, changed me bandage, applied me ear-hole spray and took me midday medications.
Another cuppa, and I set off for the hospital. Got the bus today to town, then out to the QMC.
I wus seen to quickly, and out in half an hour or so. (No prodding or groping today – Drat!)
It wus piss.. pouring down when I got out, so instead of walking to town, I caught the bus there.
I remembered I wanted to have a look in the library for a book what Antony Beever had used for reference hen he wrote ‘Stalingrad’.
It was called ‘They Never Came Back’ by Siegfried Muhler. I hobbled up three flights of stairs and asked at the desk. The nice lady eventually told me it might be out of print. I should try a book store. So I did.
First I limped to Wesley Owen Books & Music, on Castle Gate. No luck.
Then to Waterstone’s on Bridlesmith Gate. They think it’s out of print.
Then WHSmith in Victoria Centre. No luck.
Along I staggered to Mary & Tony’s Books also in Victoria Centre – the nice lady there said she may be able to get me a copy in Romanian if I wanted?
I gave up.
Pottered around the City Centre a bit, and took a photo of the Council House – and very nearly copped it again with a Disabled Scooter nearly hitting me as I took the photo! Tsk!
Then into Tesco and got some Wholemeal bread wraps and a pack of Hunter’s sausage, and Torunska sauage. Then, after I’d paid the very weary looking chap on the checkout for them, I remembered I’d ordered a pack of Silesian sausage for delivery from Morrison’s. Well, at least I won’t have to buy any meat for the rest of the week, or even longer.
I wandered gingerly up to the bus stop, and caught the bus back to the hovel.
As I dropped off the bus, I remembered I’d not made an appointment for next week with the hospital. Ah well, it’ll give me run out another day.
I got in.
Got the laptop on, and updated this tosh.
I did some graphics in readiness for later blogs.
Went up and changed me shoes fer me slippers – the stubbed me toes on the way down stairs.
Juan Inchcock, our 68 year old Nottingham correspondent and unemployed Gas Street lamp wick trimmer, found himself housebound the today.
Partly due to his arthritis, angina, losing his free-bus-pass and walking stick, the flapping holed sole of his right shoe, and the lousy wet weather.
He was straining a thrice-used Asda Smartprice tea bag, when he thought about what he might be missing on his cancelled wonderful walks through his beloved Nottingham.
He takes up the story… no hang on, he’ll take up the story when he returns from the loo.
(Whistle whistle…)
Ah here he comes….
Inchcock explains all
I feel rather sad really, realising the many things I had come to expect to see and enjoy on my daily hobble into Nottingham and by bus-ride back home again.
The things I miss most
* The skills I’ve acquired over the years in avoiding the dog phoo and broken bottles on the way to the main road.
* Checking for the gangs of yobs, and taking a different route.
* The skilful way I avoid the stones thrown at me, and ignore having my parentage questioned by the little mites in the playground as I pass the Junior school.
* Passing the many Pay-Day loan outlets is a bit depressing though. Not often I see any customers in them, but they always seem to be someone smoking, with a pram with toddler and beer cans in it, and a few kids with them. The kids are usually trying their best to destroy the furniture in the office.
* The pleasure of guessing to myself, where the next road blocked off while the police investigate the murder, stabbing, or fire-bombing that took place the previous night will be situated.
* Using my vast experience and skills in spotting and avoiding the beggars, Big Issue sellers, and pickpockets as I approach the city centre.
* Observing the playful way in which the shoplifters are occasionally removed from the stores into the police vehicles.
* Popping into the 99p store to be short-changed, sneered at and overcharged, I have to appreciate their consistency.
* Moving along to the Pound shop and getting out without physical injury is very rewarding – reminds me of jumble sales in the 1960’s.
* The St Peter’s Church area. Where one can find Jehovah’s witnesses, Muslims’ and of odd Christian spouting their beliefs.
* The clever way in which I take the routes less likely to be shat on by the pigeons, not always successfully I admit… all this experience is invaluable.
* To stand and watch Himmler, the parking attendant, with his chest out, and weighed down with all his pouches, machines, and tackle around his midriff, strutting up and down Mansfield Road, as he totally ignores cars parked on the pavement, and in the disabled bay. I often wondered if his ticket machine actually works, I’ve never seen him use it yet this year (or last year come to that!).
* The lunchtime drunks falling out of the pubs can be entertaining too.
* I often wonder if I am the only person to see the drug dealing going on in the city library and McDonald’s.
* Avoiding the gangs of lager swilling pot smoking scary looking gentlemen who gather outside of the three benefit offices in the city centre is an essential part of surviving a walk through town. But I have to take care not to trip over any of empty strong lager cans.
* The gentle whiff of rotting decay rising from the canal, as the ducks try to navigate around the shopping trolleys, condoms, empty cider bottles, and bicycles to get to the bread I’ve thrown in for them is always worth a look.
* The constant melodious sound of intruder alarms, car, and emergency vehicle sirens and klaxon’s, mingle with voices and curses of people being arrested, the children swearing, and the many different languages being spoken, all blend together to create a distinctively Nottingham sound that should be appreciated.
* A quick check on the many Charity shops – but they cannot help me!
* I might pop into the Arboretum to feed the ducks, get mugged, on my way to a meeting with my financial advisor (Social Security Benefits Office).
* An essential part of my strolls through the City Centre is to count the many and ever increasing number of retail premises closed down, for sale, lease, or rent. I do a report each month for the Outer Peruvian Pregnant Kangaroo Appreciation Society’s newsletter, although they have never printed one yet.
* I’ll often stand outside Starbucks, Caffe Nero or Costa Coffee, and sniff in the aroma, watching the people inside who can afford £2.99 for a cup of the horrible stuff.
* The pleasant group of youths who congregate in the slab square near the fountains are worth a watch while I rest me weary feet and legs and eat me seaweed. I think the one with four ear-rings, a nose ring, smudged tattoos on his neck and green dyed hair is the best of them at seeing hoe far they can spit into the paddling pool area.
* Having been hit four times my Mobility Scooters (Or the people supposedly driving them) I am on tenterhooks when in the city centre. So I have to try and keep an eye out for them while trying to keep me balance walking, and watching for potential muggers. (I’ve been mugged twice as well).
