Rare afflictions and diseases (Updated) to be weary of

Disease: Philargyristalisation (Coveted money loving, greedy git)

Osb07SymptomsWhen sufferers find their parents, MP Uncles and Aunts leave them a fortune in stocks and shares, overseas investment, property, and a Bank, that they will never have to be employed or work in their lives. They will end up lying, conning and cheating along with their fellow Etonians at running the country, and lining their own pockets even more. The Chances are those most affected, will end up becoming the First Secretary of State and Chancellor of the Exchequer for the UK. Not only this but they will be able to appear in front of thousand of voters at a sports occasion and get booed at for over five minutes and they can just stand there, smiling benignly, totally unconcerned.

Most at Risk: Those in Parliament, and Lawyers offices, although likely to be found anywhere. Those who are Christened George Gideon Arthur Osborne are most at risk of Philargyristalisation.

Area’s most affected: Affluent areas with a low crime history thanks to the Chief Constables, Judges, MPs and Banking magnates also living in the area.

Named Disease: Deipnophobia – Fear of dinner parties

NCCwalk05Symptoms: Panic attacks, Gluttonisation, Fear of embarrassment, Getting the correct Cutlery usage mixed up with eating with your hands. Passing wind at the dinner table.

Most at Risk: Lottery winners, those marrying into Royalty, and those on Benefits for life.

Named Disease: HAJ (Had-a-job) Syndrome

NCCwalk01Symptoms: Being made redundant through no fault of your own, suicidal feelings, lack of food, and the disappearance of respect. No job prospects. Evicted from your home. You use the last of your dwindling savings to apply to the Lithuanian Government to emigrate there, the you come back and get enough benefits to live on.

Most at Risk: The proletariat, anyone not related to, a banker or a friend of a Politician, the unemployed, the millions of immigrants both legal and otherwise, the impecunious, the uneducated youths of today, and the educated youths of today without rich family connections. Those over 60 who have been made redundant four times in the the previous four years.

Areas most affected: The North – Midlands, and Outer Mongolia.

Named Disease: Spooninthegobatbirthness

NCCwalk03Symptoms: A snottiness and uncaring attitude that develops in Spooninthegobatbirth sufferers, cannot be countered. The bank balance and overseas investment accounts increase exponentially. Backhanders, blackmail, bullying, lying, hypocritical cons abound, expense fiddling flourishes, and perspicaciousness dissipates from their vocabulary and mind.

Most at RiskRoyalty, Aristocracy, Politicians, Footballers, and the Right Honourable George Osborne MP (Conservative) First Secretary of State, Secretary of State for Foreign and Commonwealth Affairs, now Chancellor of the Exchequer.

Areas most affected: The top 10% of the ‘Well-off’ of the population.

Named Disease: MSTG (Monetary Cystitis Tight Gits)

CL drinkjpegSymptoms: It is extremely painful, nigh on impossible for you to repay money owed by you. They will always find something more important to spend the money they have from muggings, robbing, housebreaking and other activities on, rather than repay any debts they have. Creating false debtor of their own, they pursue, mostly elderly infirm bloggers to try and extract some dosh from them. Most of them seem to support West Ham United.

Most at Risk: Politicians, Dentists, Lawyers, Bankers, Haliburton, Motor engineers and Taxi Drivers.

Areas most affected: Nationwide, but London seems to have rather a lot of the more aggressively affected of MSTG sufferers.

Named Disease: Hope Alopecia

DuncMonkSymptomsA sudden realisation that all hope is lost, other than for the War Mongers, Politicians, bankers, and Haliburton and other nepotistic clans. Often sufferers can be found, from those waiting desperately for their retirement and release from work.

Most at Risk: Birmingham immigrants from Scotland, Brin surgeons and LibDem Party leaders.

Areas most affected: Anywhere with any businesses still owned and ran by English management, so as you can tell, there are scarce.

Named Disease: CDA (Compassion Deficiency Anemia)

NCCwalk04

Symptoms: You couldn’t give a toss about anyone else. These patients ad sufferers of CDA, didn’t start out to kill or be  the reason for millions of peoples death. It’s just that they found they liked it.

Most at Risk: Most predominant nowadays in Parliaments/Governments, and Lawyers offices, although can be  to be found anywhere.

Areas most affected: Virtually throughout the world.

Named Disease: CCYCacospysy (Irregular pulse)

Symptoms: Panic attacks at Government Budget announcement time.

Most at Risk: The poor.

Areas most affected: The North and Midlands of the UK.

Named Disease: EDD Early Decrepitude disease

NN02Symptoms: A sudden realisation that the poor are getting poorer, and the Rich are getting richer.

Most at Risk: Those who are poor and getting poorer.

Areas most affected: Worldwide: In the event that you should feel or find any of the above symptoms coming on, do not consult your Doctor who will be too rich to be bothered to understand your frustrations and problems.

You should consider suicide, alcoholism, hibernation, or becoming a Politician.

Named DiseaseA.A.D.(Alcoholic Addiction Dysrhythmia)

MikeDrinkSymptoms: Finding you have not got any alcoholic addictions, and the concern and worry you get about being so different to everyone else, and worrying how others not addicted can manage to get through their day.

Most at Risk: Council house estate families with apprentice muggers under the age of eight, the unemployed, Lib-Dem politicians and supporters, NHS patients and Junior Doctors, Bloggers, Pensioners over 70, Drug addicts under 70 and Post-natal females from Lithuania. 

Areas most affected: Anywhere in the so-called free world.

The Department of Health’s Mental Disorder Minister has asked Inchcock not to publish his article on the disease; ‘CMPIA’ Crooked Members of Parliament In Abundance.

Inchcock Today Sun 28 Feb 16: Another day of beautiful skys

If you see a Lawyer passing your car while riding a bike,

Why would you Not, run him over?

CG poorly2

It might be your bike!

******

Sunday 28 February 2016

I burst awake at around 0220hrs, fretted a few seconds, then realised the heinously detestable dream I’d been having had not real; Boy was I glad about that! I was sweating and aching all over, and wrote down some notes straight away; Just as well I did, because by the time I got to writing this diary, so many of the details had drifted off into the ether.

I had got a job, in an immense conglomerate of a site, that seemed to have all the machines and offices that I’d ever worked it, and people I knew, but couldn’t name or link to anywhere.

The dream started in an office for the interview; and they seemed glad I joined them, then into a canteen with hundreds of four seater tables. Then someone came up to me and cursed me for not being in the loading bay to record something on the log? Then I was running all over the place searching for the loading bay.

Then someone told me when I asked them, where the bay was; On the roof?

Why I don’t know, but I went out of the complex, when I eventually found the way down and found myself climbing along the outside of cliffs, that turned into different types of buildings further on. The brickwork crumbled and somehow I clung on, then started mountaineering upwards and came to an inferner lift device, one for up, one for down.

Here I had the job of taking kids out of the dodgem sized scoops that came up to where I was, and throwing them into scoops on the downward section of the lift/hoist? The ankle snappers were each giving me much grief, some picking my pockets, some kicking me in the knees and privates and some throwing sweets at me! I had to keep climbing onto the rails and down or up to free the scoops when they jammed?

Not sure what happened then, but I found myself back at the complex, searching for an office I could not find. At times, I had to tackle climbing along sticks on the walls?

Boss’s kept chasing me and telling me this or that needed doing.

Then I was back on the coastline cliffs on the roofs of cottages with decaying tiles, desperately trying to catch some burglars who kept stopping shooting at me with I think, water pistols, it felt like they loaded them with bleach, it syng so much.

A bonkers dream, but frustrating all the way through.

The reflux valve was giving me some hassle this morning.

To the porcelain, to find ‘Little Inchy’ had been bleeding while I was sleeping. 

Cleaned him up then made a cup of tea and got the laptop on.

Did yesterday’s diary and started this on off.

I had to rush to the WC Throne, during which I passed an emission of extraneous wind from the rear quarters, that must have shown as about six on the Richter Scale. This started the haemorrhoids bleeding away. Tsk!

The reflux valve was causing breathing difficulties now. Humph!

biJoyceI spent many hours creating a graphic for the Troll Free Zone members.

Not one of my best, but I was glad to get it finished and posted.

Decided to get a cuppa, have a good soak in the bath, and take a walk into the park and try to get some interesting photographicalisationing done.

Going for me ablutions and medicalisationing of all quarters now. Hehe! Then get ready for my little walk.

Back in a bit, I hope.

1500 hrs: I’m back. Got the laundry going and started to read my book. Some folks coming and going had a natter or two or three.

Moved the clobber into the dryer the net off on a walk around Woodthorpe Grange Park.

P1050085On the way up the hill behind the flats to the park, a new tree had been planted, with this plaque at the foot of it:  “In Memory of David Alex Gillett (My Darling) Loved and Missed so much”. 

Felt myself swell up a bit.

Very touching.

P1050088Got to the top of the hill, and there were plenty of folk about today, football matches, pavement cyclists, screaming ankle-biters and yobboes lurking about in little gangs.

It was cold again too.

I walked along the top towards the footpath back down to the flats, and near the copse, I noticed a squirrel going across the mud and grass, then up one of the bare trees.

P1050086 P1050087

Got the camera out and tried to take a decent shot of him or her, but it went even higher, so these were the best I could manage to get.

This is the first squirrel I’ve seen for weeks. Do they hibernate?

Down the gravel footpath back to the flats, and had another read of me war book.

Then the foyer got busy with other tenants, and I enjoyed some more quick gossips in between.

About 30 minutes later, the dryer finished and I took out the washing and returned to the flat.

Put away the cleaned items. Got the lamb shank simmering in the saucepan. And took the two rubbish bags to the waste chute.

Made a cuppa. Changed into my slippers and put the dressing gown and sleeveless gloves on, it was getting really cold now. The forecast is for -3º c tonight.

P1050089Garden peas in the pan, made the gravy with the juice from the peas and got the fodder served up.

Had some potato cakes (Just out of date but still). 

Put food in the small bowl and had a great time eating nd enjoying it. 

Rated this 9.62/10. Great flavour! 

I must try to get some more of those lab shanks tomorrow after going to the doctors. They are nearly all bone, but the taste is excellent.

Medications were then taken.

Shoe cleaning completed.

Bath enjoyed.

TV on and fell to sleep!