Monday, 16th May 2022
I was hoping for a better day!
Things stirred back to reality at 05:25hrs, after 6 hours of sleep and various periods of jumping awake. Making a total time being awake of two hours. Does that make sense? Sorry if not.
According to the best I can make out from the scribbled memory notes, the next occurrence was; P.Tarone Enight? Beats me!
I rose like a tried elephant from the c1968 second-hand recliner, grabbed walking stick Metal Mickey, and went to the wet room to get the Ablutions done.
But my dithering nature interfered, and I took the waste bin out of the wet room, emptied the others and made up some waste bags. Took them to the flat door.
It was drizzling outside, and as I put the kettle on, I took a photo of the road to the left of the kitchenette window. Plenty of trees on it get fresh air.
It’s no wonder I’ve never seen a for sale sign on the beautiful looking Cavendish Vale.
The skies were, I thought, ripe for a few minutes of pareidolia. I’m keen on finding figures in the clouds. But on this occasion, I failed to find any. Humph!
Well, apophenia, finding figures in anything, creases, reflections, cracks in floor tiles, and bulging veins. I’m experienced in that one, having more bulging veins than most people.
I made the tea, went to put the milk in, but diverted back to getting the ablutioning done.
Well, once again, it was a fair session. Fair enough, a few teeny-weeny cuts shaving, but no knocks and bangs, dizzies, toe-stubbings or tumbles. I didn’t engage the Smug-Mode… it’s early yet.
I even got out through the door without any shoulder-charging of the frame… Yes, go on then;
Got the laundry bag sorted. Made another mug of tea for the one I let go cold, and Dizzy Dennis gave me a few moments of concern… only a short bout, maybe a minute at most. But it had me holding on to the stick and hastening to sit down. But Dennis disappeared, and I was fine when I stood up? There are no messages from EQ, but I think it may be another semi-harrowing day, somehow?
Sunday’s photograph of the messy mud-slide onto the end car park on Chestnut Way. It has been known for Cataract Kathleen to do this to me! I hope I’ve not put this one on before?
This is this morning’s shot of the same area. I found some more of the indecipherable scrawl on the memory pad here, not the foggiest of what it meant. Try as I did, it remains a mystery,
A sudden robust rumbling from the innards! I was all but too late, getting to the Throne in time in seconds. Trotsky Terence controlled the evacuation. Gawdawfull messy it was! Had to change the PPs (Protection Pants) I’d put on an hour ago! Ah, well, I got everything cleaned up.
Richard arrived late; he’d had a lousy shift, I think. The poor lad looked done in. He still had a look at the SD card for me. Putting it in and out to see if anything changed; and found that the card had split! He took the waste bags out with him for me, with my thanks.
I hope the new card works in the Canon and the reader accepts it. Praying here! I opened the card, full of hope and cut my finger on the plastic! Got it fitted in the camera (not the finger, the SD card), and I tried taking shots that I did yesterday to use here and test the system. Good heavens, it worked! So, I engaged in the use of the, with reservations. As you can see here, it worked.
Outside my Winwood Heights Independent Living block of flats, I hobbled out onto the balcony to look at what was. Conducted my Blood Pressure and temperature checks. SYS 154, DIA 68, Pulse 78, and the body temperature was a decent 34.1°c.
A couple of miles away, I took a zoomed-in shot of HMP, her Majesties Nottingham Prison. And thoughts and questions permeated through… “I bet they can see their prison Doctor or Dentist at any time?”, “They’ll get their cataracts done quicker than I get mine!” “They are not worried about the rent, electricity, food, transport, bus fares, etc. going up?” “Most likely, get their free computers mended for free!” They’ll not worry about forgetting to lock their doors either! Hahaha!
Gawd, he’s been at it again, almost one-stop since morning. Bang, tap-tap, scrape, thud, boing… I did not retaliate. After all, what is the point in haggling with the self-centred, impolite, insensitive, disrespectful, snobbish, haughty, pompous, pretentious, uppity, scoffing, contumelious, smart-alecky, and ineffable, cruel, unsympathetic, toffee-nosed, self-important, nyaff, noisy nasty man?
As luck has it, I like him.
Far too ridiculously late, I made a start on this blog. Of course, something had to go wrong…
Am I the luckiest person on earth, I asked myself?
That honour must go to Steve Fries, the bigwig of Liberty Global, Whose inability to send an uninterrupted internet signal to Nottingham earns him $23 million a year!
Jealous? Me? Yes!
Miraculously, it was only down for a minute or so this time; I felt almost happy about it! Temporarily!
I thought I’d better check to see if any messages or missed calls had been received while I was so busy being mucked about my Herbert and Fries. Still, Herbert entertained me with some clattering-about sounds.
Could I find the phone? No! There was worry but no panic initially. All I had to do, was go through all of my jackets and trousers that I’d worn since I last used the mobile phone (whenever that was). I vaguely remember putting it in a pocket and saying, “Don’t forget that it’s in that pocket!”
Within about ten minutes, I settled for Thursday, when the foot lady texted me telling me I was late for my appointment again… that was in the brain box! I engaged my Sherlock Holmesian Methodology, and first, I worked out when I last went out. Now, what was I wearing? Maroon jacket? Blur jacket? Black trousers, or green trousers? Was I wearing my trousers – nobody said anything.
After a heated discussion with myself, I narrowed it down to the green or black trousers; and the red or blue jacket, all of which were in the laundry bag. Then thought, aha! (I do that sometimes), It might be in the pyjama bottoms, two pairs of them in the laundry. I almost felt confident as I went into the back room to search for the clothing in the bag… I should have known better at my age and after many years of failed memory training!
Well, now I was getting hot under the collar! I smugly checked through every pocket and the bag… not sausage in there. (Not that I was after one, of course, a figure of speech and all that).
A lengthy search in each room and all the clothes hanging up in the front room and the hallway proved a failure, with no mobile to be seen. Of course, if I knew my mobile number, I could ring it and hope I heard it to locate it. Although if it was in a pocket, as I still believed it was, I might not hear it anyway… I rang the desktop dancer and Warden Deana to ask if she could ring the mobile for me, but to was engaged… oh, that reminds me; she is six weeks away from getting married; bless her, and a lucky fellow too… I digress again, sorry. I do tend to do that a lot.
I rummaged, rooted and ferreted about, delving into the most unlikely of places, all to no avail. Then a spark in the brain suggested that it may have fallen and gone underneath the cabinet or recliner? Worth a look, so I did…
I got the torch and was leaning on the arm of the recliner to get low enough to check the sides, with my intentions bravely being, if no success, to get on my knees to look under the chair. But as I was leaning forward and on my left leg – perfect timing from the Nicodemus’s Neurotransmitters, who gave me a flailing right leg out of control dance… Which naturally had me on the floor in seconds. The spectacles are now in a precariously loose state of repair. Also, I’ve got two newly bruised knees and a red cheek from hitting the arm on the way down!
As I was recovering and considering how to get back up on my feet, Deana came in at just the perfect time! She got me up, made sure things still worked with the legs, and laughed at the (at the time unknown to me) red patch on the cheek that looked like a clown’s make-up! Hahaha! Not really, but she should have.
Deana rang my mobile. I couldn’t hear it. But she found it, under the cover on the back of the computer chair… in a jacket pocket! I am totally losing it, and a twit!
Well, worra day! Again! It’s nearly 1700hrs now, so sleep looks like being late tonight. This blog is not halfway through yet! I pressed on with it like a mini but fat hero, determined to get it up to date…
♫Oh, Susana♫ rang out. I hobbled to the door (It was a pronounced hobble, the right knee was in some pain, Tsk!) and found Josie returning the jar that held the two meals for yesterday. Bless her, I could not hear what she was saying, but plashed a smile, mentioning Betty Bunter, bless her.
Arrived, soon sorted. Then, I had a go at catching up on Facebooking. Then comments on WordPress.
Got the nosh started. It is now passed 21:00hrs. It’s been another gruelling day. I caught my hand on the oven dish as I took it out of the oven. I believe I said, “Bother!”
Veggie burger, fries, tomatoes and some sugar snap crap Ecuadorian peas. I realised a small stale cake and an out-of-date, but I could not see the date, and tasting it realised it was rancid. The banana was okay, though. However, despite these minor upsets, the flavour rating given was 6.5/10.
Had a wash, and when I came out to do the pot washing, the great sky looked to me just like an oil or water painting.
I took my time taking the last photo, as it was zoomed-in and getting the Canon camera to hold steady enough for a decent shot was not easy. I probably had to take six or seven tries to get this last one, which is not very good. But retains something about it that I like.
I deleted the old snaps on the new SD card. Thinking it would be less confusing for Kathleen’s Cataracts, Doreen’s Dementia and me. But no, I only deleted two that had not been put on the computer yet! Hehe!
Getting to sleep was nigh on impossible; well, it was. The Thought Storms rampaging through the brain, self-hatred, shame, fear… I was in the right state. It’d been a messy day, but why this? I put the TV on, but that didn’t send me off. Utter worn-outedness did it in the end, around about 02:30hrs!
Still, yers don’t like to complain, does yer?
Alto-Inchies Ode on Inchcock
I’ve been a bit worried about Inchcock for many a day,
His brain has been loaded with worries & clamjamfry…
Doreen’s Dementia is getting more and more on display!
His memory is shot to pieces, bar some bits of scintillae,
He’s had two falls, one on Sunday, another on Monday,
His outlook, ideas and hopes become anachronistically…
If they come at all, his writing is full of godwottery!
But it wouldn’t help if he won the lottery…
He’s lost interest in anything financially…
His nest egg dwindling, becoming almost eleemosynary,
Worried over increases, rent, care, food, even his tea!
Electricity, travel, all risen in price, becoming too costly…
Will he get through it? There’s no guarantee…
If he tops hissen, what’ll happen to me?
Alto-Egos don’t always have it this easy,
Dominating Inchcock has been easy peasy!
Where will they move me? What human will I accrue?
Putin? His Alto-Ego could resign, but will he do?
I’d like to get at a human that’s evil, bloodthirsty!
For I fear I’ll get another docile twit like Inchie.
Written to create a laugh and or smile!
19 thoughts on “Inchcock Today: Monday 16th May 2022”
Beautiful sky photos. Great looking meal. The burn looks painful Careful, my man.
I am also one for enjoying the sport of pareidolia, and also a person who participates in apophenia throughout the day and probably in my dreams at night. Both allow you to make sense of the environment…or something. Owt and nowt occurring simultaneously. But I must admit that it is more difficult to find recognizables in that swath of mixed gray cloudscape.
Herbert the Fulsome so identifies with noisome clanger music, music according to his ear I might suppose.
Red vehicles do like that section of the parking world at Woodthorpe, even the mud slide has a bit of a red tinge to it…but I might be a bit colorblind there. I once worked with a fellow who was very colorblind, he chose interesting clothing with various colors that clashed more than a bit.
Is HMP that expanse of white-painted buildings? Her Majesty’s Playground?
The sunset photos are absolutely splendiferous. Marvelous color-swept palette, a bit fancier than the gray cloudage.
And the views of the Altos are full of opinions not necessarily the views of the author?
Upon the cloud investigating Billum; I so annoys me when I see, or think I see mayhaps a cats head in the sky when I take a photo – then when the card-reader allows me, I get it on the computer, I can’t find it? Does this happen to the Proffesor?
Ah, clashing clothes, I am with similar problems, but there is no one to advise me nowadays. Hehehe!
Yes indees Sir, that be HMP. Just posted a blog on that Sir.
I’m not sure about the Alto’s thoughts, I’, beginning to wonder if I’m changing from Human to Alto, and back again, without realising it?
It is now 03:30hrs, when I woke I assumed it was the usual time of twixt four to five hours, and wee-wee’d, washed and got on the computer to finish off the HMP blog, it appears, best I can guessimate, I woke up around 01:30hrs… and now I have confused myself altogether. Help! Hehehe!
Seeing forms on a cloud must involve a different part of the brain, or some process that interprets the shape. That now makes me wonder what gives there. We have a laboratory devoted to optical delusionary or illusionary objects (UDO or UIO), it might be Lab 33 or Lab 72: your guess is as good as mine, of course.
I believe that each of us exists on a spectrum from human to alto, depending upon “who knows what” or “what knows whom”.
Looking forward to reading more on HMP, Sir.
I often forget what day it is. Yesterday was a Tuesday because that is the day that elections get scheduled over here, thus making today a Wednesday. Knowing this sequence also comes in handy when visiting the past or future with my time machine. Beware of dinosaurs or Morlocks.
Thank you for that cleverly wrote comment Proffesor Billum, that cheered me up and brought forth a laugh out loud at least twice! Muchum needed, too Sir (Herberts been at it again).
I fanketh you! Love to all.
So glad that you liked my commentskis on the shapes we imagine, things that brought on a much needed larf as well.
I certainly loved it!
Cat arrange themselves in many twisted and contorted manners, such as my latest photo of Fozzie the Fuzzy.
Inmates in HMP seem to wear similar types of outfits, what is the probability of such a fashion choice. Must be many millions to one, perhaps more. I always seem to put on the same kind of clothes, and never wear a necktie. Don’t miss the days before retirement when I had to wear what was expected for the company image.
I think you may indeed be experiencing a morphing process with Alto, and he with you. Ending up with a HumanAlto or an AltoHuman?
Waking up and not knowing the hour can result in confusion, especially when multiple hours are involved. Confusing yourself is inevitable methinks. Help is on the way, well as soon as I determine what the emergency phone number is in the UK. Here it is 911.
Aha, memories of Cyril prompted, thanks Bill.
Iconcur with the necktie Sir! 24 years managing Co-op, ten at Tesco, and then wearing the clipon tie (Theoretically it was harder for the guard to get strangled), for twelve years of so. One good thing about my third redundancy, I no longer own a tie of any description… and good riddance I say, so I’m in complete agreement with you Billum!
Now you mention it, mate, (Hehe) there could be a merging of different lofe-forms going on… no wonder I get confused so easily.
Had me larfing there, bless you, Sir!
Fret not of the number. Nein, nein, nein! I’ll remember it soon, erm…
Clip-on ties are convenient, and now I see that it is more difficult to strangle someone with a clip-on. Safety First!
Redundancy does have its bright sides.
I got a good larf from that memory aid for remembering the emergency number to dial. Dial even though I know of no one who employs a telephone with a rotary dial. What are they to do?
Hahaha! Well puit put humourly vented, too!
I’m going to lower the tone. If virgin media went down, methinks a virgin no more. 🙂 Strange how the mind works.
I can follow that, Sir. A Virgin in name only, Liberty-Global bought Virgin Media out for billions, and the’ve told tele-staff never to mention their name over the phone. I’m not surprised – CRAP!
Look at me, waffling again… Tsk!
There’s so much crap out there it stinks, whatever happened to even a modicum of pretence to actually care for the customer. went to a shop recently and was ignored for 15 minutes, but I needed what they had, no interest whatsoever in me. (I think they were millennials) 🙂
I guess money, freed and jealousy rules at the end of the day. (Did I say that?)
You did, and it’s true, sadly 🙂