Tag: Arthur Itis

Inchcock Today: Sat 31st January 2015 – Sleepless night…Tsk!

Saturday 31st January 2015

Spent the night trying to get to sleep without any luck at all?

Gave up and made a cuppa and took me medications – then fell asleep!

Had to rush about a bit (Well I say rush… hobble rapidly is more like it) to get things ready for me visit to Sister Jane, she is not one to cross by being late believe me!

Had a shave and got missen spit and polished – got the things to take with to get Pete’s birthday and pay him a visit and I set off… then returned to change into me shoes from me slippers and set-off again…

I caught the bus into town to save time being as I had got a little behind this morning (They can’t touch me for it… can they?).

I got off at the Victoria bus station and took a photo of the Victoria flats (Apartments) and the sky that held clouds that seemed to be travelling at great speeds across the sky, I half expected the picture to come out blurred. Hehe!

I walked through the bus-station and into the top-level of the shops – sneaking some seeds to the pigeons on my way through – and I made for the Menkind Shop, after a look around I chose some pressies for Brother-in-law Pete that I thought he and Sister Jane would both like.

I opted for these three here like wot I photographicalised.

They both seemed to appreciate the humour in the first two, and the novelty and practicality of the ‘pen’.

I made me way in the wind and rain to the bus-stop for the West Bridgford buses and caught one quickly. Just avoiding being clouted by a cyclist on the pavement as I joined the queue – Git!

The bus was well crammed with passengers and when it came time for me get off – the left knee was restrained by Arthur Itis and I missed the bus-stop. Tsk!

Hey-ho, not too much rain when I alighted and started the short 10 minute walk to Jane’s posh house.

Mind you some of the pavements where no sun had got to needed a bit of careful manoeuvring along, due to the reattainment of the earlier snow making them a little slippery in places and the knee still not to enthusiastic about being used.

I arrived at their dwelling and was greeted and was given a cup of tea – I mentioned it was a bit weak and Pete said it was the tea-bags I’d recommended for them because they were strong ones, Glengettie brand. I said I couldn’t believe it it was so weak. With a smile Pete added “Probably because he’s made three cups with one tea-bag! Tight wad! Hehe.

I got Pete to take some head shots of me so I could doctor and use them later in me graphics, oh and one of me and Sister Jane to put on Facebook for the TFZ gals and guys.

When Jane viewed the photo on the camera she said:

“Ah, the dimple family!”

Then I took one of Jane and Pete that I thought came out alright.

They were wearing red because they were going to the Nottingham Forest match against Millwall later – that is why I had to visit them earlier than usual.

Oh, I almost forgot, I took a photograph of Fooey – in his usual position in his favourite chair – sleeping!

He’s getting on now, like all of us and I have always felt an affinity with him – he’s old, friendly, poorly, deaf and pretty ugly bless him.

We had a natter for a while (Jane Pete and me that is, Fooey doesn’t yer know… Hehe) and then I walked to the bus-stop with Pete who was going to the shops and I caught a bus into Nottingham.

As we walked into West Bridgford centre Pete pointed out some Mistletoe growing high up in a tree. So unusual I took a photograph of it from under the tree. Never seen that before?

Then on to the bus-stop where Pete carried on to do his shopping.

Again the bus was crammed full but I was just glad to be travelling for free

with me bus-pass, particularly with the knees playing up so.

As I got off the bus in town at an early stop to have a little walk around, the wind was getting stronger although it was not a cold one.

I wandered around for a while and called into an Asian store on Goosegate got some seaweed and blackbean sauce.

As I came out of the store I noticed several vehicles parked on the double yellow lines near the DG Cabs HQ.

Naughty!

As I limped towards the bus-stop for the Carrington buses, I espied another dangerous cyclist-swine crossing the traffic lights and onto the pavement – again!

By the way, when I was in the MenKind shop – I saw they were selling although they were out of stock today and were unsure when or if they would get any more – A pen camera! Must look again there, might get one to record the naughty cyclists on Nottingham pavements?

Back in Carrington I remembered I’d forgotten to make an appointment with the GP. Tsk!

Popped in the Co-op to get some bread. On the shuffle back to the dump I sneaked the pigeons who massed around me some seeds.

Got in and WC’d and the rumbling continued from me innards, but Arthur Itis was more bothersome today, and the rear-end piles were bleeding again. Still, yer don’t like to complain do yers?

Decided to have braised beef and instant potatoes for me nosh… ended up having beef sandwiches and microwave chips.

So tired now, hope for some sleep tonight.

TTFN all.

Inchcock Today: Friday 30th January 2015

Sorry about my absence recently folks – a most regrettable series of unexpected events having taken place and testing my patience to extremes.

Dentist problems, Arthur Itis, Anne Gyna, laptop dying a death, medical appointments – bought a new second-hand laptop that was as much use as a ‘Fart in a colander’ wouldn’t let me use coreldraw or let me on the web at all – got another one, this let me on the web and install and use Coreldraw (Fair enough Coreldraw still crashes regularly though), feeling so low about it all. Then of course could I find the unsaved passwords and user names?

Then I could not load Word so had to use the free Apache word processor. Luckily it gave me the option of which programmes to link to it. After some farcical fa-lingering (Is that a word… it should be!)

Not a bad little package either, I like it.

Downloaded AVG antivirus and installed it on new second had used laptop wot I’m using.

I wish I could find a way to disable the touch-pad though – I keep making errors and faux pas with catching it when typing or mousing and finding myself faced with complicated pages from deep within the laptops secrets asking me to choose options I have no idea about?

What a palaver!

Friday 30th January 2015

Up at 0500hrs

Lousy night full of dreams of which I can only recall odd bits of:

I think I had become a judge or dictator and was passing sentence on cyclists who drove on the pavement: 6 years… without medical attention, food, visitors and locked in their cells for the duration?

Bit worrying that…

Forced myself down the stairs (carefully) and noticed how light it was – t’was the snow that made it so!

Made a cuppa and took me medications.

I must try to get out later to the Nottingham Hospice Charity shop, snow permitting and get a walk in.

Started this diary passed wind and visited the porcelain again. I thought I’d got rid of the rumbling innards but back it comes. Huh!

Had a go at trying to work out how Serif Art works… gave up.

I wondered how the pigeons and mallards were doing now the snow had returned – hope I can get to feed one or the other of em later.

The arthritis and angina are not too bothersome yet today, the innards might keep me from getting my walk into Sherwood and bus to town though – I’ll do some graphics and see how they brew.

Coreldraw9 crashed and I had to force close and go through the starting instructions again. Huh! As I was about to close the laptop – Windows updates came in, so I ticked download. Taking so long I left em installing.

Took myself down to the kitchen to have a wash shave and titivationing as the tap twister in the bathroom has fell to pieces. Am I lucky or what? Hehe.

Got changed and the bits ready for the Nottingham Hospice Charity shop and set off, sneaking the dickies some seed as I departed.

The snow has all but gone now and I felt in decent spirits as I set off up Mansfield Road into Sherwood.

The sky was beautiful – then I was advised by my grumbling innards that it would be a wise move to find a toilet ASAP! Despite the pain in me knees I sped as fast as I could to the Sherwood Library – just in time. Luckily my EQ had made me carry a toilet roll in me bag that came in very handy as the WC there had only those little tiny shiny postage stamp size sheets!

I came away cleansed and proud of my foresight! I felt like stopping someone and telling them… but I resisted.

The constant involuntary wind emissions as I hobbled up the hill to the Hospice shop had me a tad worried, but all seemed okay.

I dropped off the goodies and caught a bus into town. The emissions of wind stopped as fast as they had started – until I was stood up waiting in the queue of folk to get off the bus – the ensuing involuntary blast that escaped will probably result in someone writing to the local paper about it… it felt like it lifted me up – and the pain with it!!!

So off to the Victoria Shopping Mall toilets, I didn’t need to guess, the haemorrhoids were bleeding badly after the nuclear explosion from me rear! Tsk!

So it took about 40 minutes from my thinking how well I was doing and feeling confident to becoming a nervous wreck! Hehehe.

Cleaned up and refreshed again… I had a poddle through the shopping mall taking some pictures for the TFZ gals in the market.

I called in the cheapo shop for the 4 for a quid Lion bars wot I like – they had gone up in price! Damnations curses and sadness ensued!

Nipped into Tesco and got some Cox’s apples (Best tasting in the world yer know when fresh), and special offer microwaveable buttered potatoes.

Had a wander around and ended up in Trinity Square, where I sneaked some seeds to the pigeons. I’m really must stop doing this before I get caught and fined, but there is one pigeon who has lost his foot and hobbles around bravely getting beaten to the food by the others usually – and I just can’t help feeding him.

The shopping centre apparently built the sides of the building sloping to prevent the pigeons roosting – hehehe!

I took a photo from the gallery walkway over Upper Parliament Street, no shortages of buses today in the City of Nottingham… fair enough they were not moving mind but…

As I walked back to the bus stop I espied two mobile food outlets next to each other – Joe’s Burger and chips and Ali’s Lamb / Chicken kababs and doughnuts. It makes me wonder how these chaps make it pay. They’re both with a few hundred yards of McDonald’s, Burger King, Kentucky Fried Chicken, two independent cafés and a gigantic cafe for the less well off.

It amazes me, especially as there were only three customers at one of the stalls?

Any road, I made me way to the bus-stop, but didn’t make it, I had to divert into the public toilets on King Street hastily – again just in time. Oh dear, getting fed up with with this now! I must call and make an appointment with the doctor.

Back to the bus-stop, searched fer me bus-pass which I knew I had earlier… found I’d dropped it in me bag somehow. Huh!

Got back in the hovel and paid a painful visit to the porcelain. Creams applied!

Put me bits away and checked on laptop, the windows updates had finished at least. Kept getting message from AVG that the initial full scan had failed and needed doing urgently – went into AVG and it told me I was protected?

Started this update and Coreldraw9 seemed to acting okay.

Had the mash with franks and bread, followed by yoghourt and a lion bar.

Got to get out early in the morning to get so see Sister Jane, but could I get to sleep… huh! 

The “Zimmer Frame Squeak’s” Pop Group formed by Inchcock

Nottingham Pensioner inspired by Englebert Humperdink’s comeback!

Arnold George Dorsey was born in Madras one of ten children to British Army NCO Mervyn Dorsey, who was of Irish descent, and his wife Olive, who was of German descent.

His impression of Jerry Lewis prompted friends to begin calling him “Gerry Dorsey”, a name he worked under for almost a decade. A name-change to the more arresting Engelbert Humperdinck, borrowed from the German 19th-century composer of operas such as Hansel and Gretel. Dorsey adopted the name professionally.

On 1 March 2012, the BBC announced that Humperdinck would represent the United Kingdom in the final of the Eurovision Song Contest 2012.

Juan found out about this in 2014 during one of his rare moments of awareness.

Henglebert Eumperdink’s return to sing in the Euro-vision Song Contest for England, has inspired the Nottingham pensioner and former Bottle Cork Tester Juan Inchcock to form a musical group from within his Nottingham City Hospital Rehabilitation Group members.

Manager and lead singer of the group Inchcock (69) commented on the forming of the group to our reporter Lint Onitt:

“The group currently consists of Arthur Itis (71), Cis Titus (60), Anne Gina (67), Con Genital (59), Ed Imma (82), Dee Zees (63), and Harry Thmia (63), but of course any one could pop their clogs at any-time, so we have a few reserves to replace them as and when we do drop off like.”

We waited while Mr Inchcock coughed up some blood-laced black gooey phlegm, limped to the WC to pass water, returned looking pale and shaky, smiled, adjusted his hearing aids and then continued:

“Our first recording is a mix of Bernard Bresslaw’s ‘They were making mad passionate love’, Bernard Cribbin’s ‘Right said Fred’, and Morecome & Wises ‘Boom Oooh Yatatata’, with a backing sounding similar to ‘Your a Pink toothbrush, I’m a blue toothbrush’ from Max Bygraves.”

I was flabbergasted, Juan had caught my attention with that statement.

Mr Inchcock scratched at his impetigo, and picked at the welts on his hands for a while, hobbled to the WC again, and returning muttering to himself about the Outer Mongolian Gungo bean crop being down by 2.6% in 1969, rubbed his arthritic knees then added:

“Although some parts of the recording were originally made in 1959, we think this song will impress the younger generation – when we first played it to the Rehabilitation staff here at the centre, they were speechless!”

He struggled to the WC, continuing when he returned covering his flies area with his welt covered finger bent crooked hands:

“And the sound is original too, not many songs out there that are recorded using a bazooka, comb and paper, and live recordings from the operating theatre!

We call our group ‘The Zimmer Frame Squeak’s’…”

At this point Mr Inchcock coughed, went white, passed wind and collapsed in a flabby heap on the floor, and was collected by the porters, carried to the WC and then taken out through the back doors.

Group member Arthur Itis (71) called out “Right I’ll take over now, we’ll do Bill Hayleys ‘Rock around the clock instead now Juan’s clocked out!”

If he survives, we will try to bring you more on this new old genre in music!

Inchcock Today: Tuesday 6th January 2015

Kept waking up throughout the night and each time I think I remembered parts of different dreams, but foolishly did not write any notes to trigger me into remembering them later to record here. Had a feeling I really wanted to, but no.

Got up at 0315hrs. Started laptop and made a cuppa.

WC’d.

Finalised and posted yesterdays Diary. Then started this one up to here… felt so low again for some reason.

The angina was okay, Arthur Itis still bad, the ulcer was okay, but I had specks of blood in both ear-holes?. I cleaned the ear-pieces of them both yesterday, wondered if I did not rinse them fully?

WC then another cuppa and took me medications.

Pottered about on Facebook and did some graphics for the TFZ stite.

Got the things ready to take to the Nottingham Hospice Charity shop. Then had a scrub up and got ready to go on me walk into Sherwood. Radio Nottingham said it was gong to be -3c tonight. Tsk!

Raining this morning bit windy but not cold now.

Set off on me walk up the first hill and down, where  took a photo of the traffic half way down.

The ran seemed to be lessening somewhat now – but the twit in the Mercedes still turned into the side road without signalling.

I carried on down the hill and up the next to the Hospice  shop and dropped me stuff off.

Came out and stood at the bus-stop, where I had an interesting conversation with an elderly lady took place. (I think – we were both wearing hearing aids):

Me: “The rain seems to be easing off a bit!”

The Lady: “They all say it’s due to the Poll Tax yer know!”

Me: “Yes?”

End of conversation.

I wonder what it was she thought I’d said? I was going to ask her but thought that would get us into an even deeper verbal pickle.

Bus to town and walked down to the City Centre to catch the tram to Bulwell. They were taking down the Winter Festival buildings this morning.

All I was going to Bulwell for was to take photographs of the market, feed the ducks and see if  could get some of them blackcurrant ice-cream lollies.

Got into reading me book and nearly missed me stop!

Went to the river Leen bridge and there were a few mallards today, so fed the little darlings.

The shopping trolley was still in the river. Tsk!

I wandered over to Fultons food shop but had none of me lollies in. They did have some microwave sausages in on special price though, so  got a tray. They’ll be me nosh for tonight.

Called in other shops but no lollies.

B&M stores had Heinz Curry flavoured beans at 4 for a quid. The bags were getting heavy now.

They also had some kids winter footwear at £3.99 to £5.99 on sale. They looked alright too, a bargain there for the ankle-biters shplifters… I mean parents.

Into the Pound Shop and got a bag of bird-seed and a can of fabric freshener. Very good when the wind emmissions get naughty you know!

Then into the market for a look around.

As I made my way to the bus-station the sky turned rather threatening again straight in front of where I was, but it was clear to the left and right?.

The rain started to get heavier and I sheltered under a bus-stop until the bus arrived.

I started nodding off on the bus, so got me book out and had a read like.

Phlegm coming up when I coughed now.

As I walked down the street to the hovel, I noticed a flower box with, maybe they were primroses battling the elements and growing in January.

I got in and WC’d and made a cuppa, started the laptop and made loads of microwave sausage sandwiches and set about demolishing them, followed by a Lemon yoghurt, ice lolly and a mousse and another cup of tea and me medications!

The stomach rumbled, the knees were painful, Arthur Itis was in a bad mood

Did some blogging and Facebooking and tiredness overcame me so I got me head down earlier then normal… Zzzzz…

Inchcock Today: A cold Tue 30th December 2014

Dream filled night again. Woke several times and the last time 0300hrs I made some notes of the dreams to aid my recording of the bits I could remember later.

WC.

Using me new glasses (spectacles) today, the reading ones don’t half pinch the bridge of me nose, when I move em or take em off its like taking off an Elastoplast!

Started the laptop and went to make a cup of char. Flipping cold again. Bravely opened the front door and took a photo quickly of the ice and frosted cars. This convinced me that going out to the laundry with two big bags of washing would not be a good idea today. I had enough problems getting about on the ice yesterday thank you.

Arthur Itis in the knees and ankles seemed in a good mood this morning, the rumbling grumbling innards and wind was back with a vengeance, the piles were sore, the angina was not bad at all at this stage and the ulcer was quiet too.

I returned to the laptop to start this Diary: first job to sort the notes of the dreams I’d made an hour or so earlier, but some of the things I’d written meant nothing to me?:

I was on Mansfield Road with two chaps and we sat on the pavement next to each other and were fishing on/in the road and talking?

At one time the corridors were there again with me running through them searching for something or someone, dark shadowy tunnels…

Then I was on some steps leading up into the clouds that seemed to open for me to enter… in my pyjamas I think and struggling to carrying a gigantic wheel-clamped car wheel?

Someone was hitting me on the head in an old telephone box, while I was trying to change the points in a Railway signal box seemingly at the same time with Elvis singing Rock-a-hula-baby in the background?

WC’d.

Made another cuppa and did some blogging and facebooking. I got a bit carried away with making graphics and neary forgot to take me medications. Tsk! Better a tad late than never eh.

-3º C (26º F) this morning.

I continued for hours making graphics for Facebook and posted em.

Read a few chapters of me book. It is heavy going smetimes but I’m enthralled with how the writers are getting through the ‘Who was blamed and  how those who were actually responsible masterminded the cover-up’.

Then I forced myself to get ready to see how the pavements were and assess if I dare go out to get some bread. Tsk!

 When changing me clothes I found blood on my hands… dang, dang, dang-dang! Hehe… I’d cut me neck shaving. Fancy that I thought.

Gingerly I left the hovel – to be greeted with pigeons wanting their daily seeds and fed em quickly before anyone noticed me.

It was still risky walking underfoot just like yesterday.

Got to the bus-stop looked for me reading glasses to view the timetable thingy and realised I’d left them at home. Fancy that I said (Again).

As the bus was going through the top estate a car came out of a driveway into the road without stopping and as near as damn it collided with another car. I assume either his brakes had failed or  the car slid on the ice on the driveway? As the bus pulled up at a stop I had a birds eye view of the altercation that took place between the two drivers. I think it might have developed into fisticuffs but the bus pulled away and the windows were too dirty due to the weather for me to take a photo of it.

A few hundred yard up the road and a police car sped in their direction with its ‘Blue & Twos going, maybe things did develop angst-wise between them?.

I got off the bus in Arnold and went into Asda to try and get some of those mini-frankfurters that I found so tasty. After searching for a while, I asked an assistant who told they no onger stocked them as they only had them in for Christmas. “Oh,” said I, “I’ll come back in a year if I’m still alive then shall I?” “Yes” she said.

I noticed their Kiosk & Customer Service sign and laughed a little to myself after last weeks performance when I went to get help and customer service from them.

I got a ready made Potato Gratin meal I think the writing on the pack said microwavable, but without me reading spec’s? (It turned out later it was – phew!) and some Lemon Curd flavoured yoghurt.

Noticed two more shops on Front Street had closing down Sales on.

I went into Futlon Foods shop, but the queues were mighty long. Had a search for me blackcurrant lollies but they had none in stock so I meandered out and down the road to Iceland.

Much more luck there, although they didn’t have any of me Bread Thins in just like all the other shops I tried? Still I got some baking potatoes, french fries, Yorhshire teabags 50% free and on offer too, microwaveable pork sub-rolls and jam and cream doughnuts. By gosh I live well, I know I’ve said it before, but I reckon HRH would be jealous yer know. Oh, and I got a Shepherds for 89p too.

As I was walking back to the bus-stop a van turned left in to Front Street – the wrong way!. The crowds loved that and waved at him and shouted… he parked facing the wrong way naturally and I watched another verbal battle developing!

I pressed on and caught the bus back to Carrington.

When I got off the bus the sunlight was very strong, although it was not hot enough to melt any of the ice on the pavements.

St Johns church looked nice, and I took a picture of it from the other side of the road. Best I thought ’cause when I take one from the back or Church Drive I often catch someone letting their dog crap in the graveyard as they walk their pet through it, kids vandalising the gravestones, muggers lurking or druggies dealing.

I nearly went and did another ‘Whoopsiedangleplop’ on the ice, twisted me knee stopping myself and of course now Arthur Itis is annoyed about it and letting me now. Tsk!

Got in and put me fodder away.

Planned what to have for nosh tonight. 

Shepherds pie methinks, with bread and followed by yoghurt, a lolly and a doughnut – not healthy but…

Oh… I didn’t get any bread – bother!

I enjoyed my shepherds pie, french fries lollies and yoghurt.

No wonder I have rumbling innards!

Inchcock Today: Monday 22nd December 2015

Monday 22nd December

Woke up at 0350hrs to the tune of me stomach grinding and a-churning and utilised the toilet yet again, as I had throughout the night.

WC.

It’s like a maelstrom in my innards again. Oh deary me, but not so bad later in the day.

I’m supposed to go to the launderette today as there are no INR checks at the hospital due to the holidays.

I’ll see how things develop and if they settle down stomach-wise later.

Went down and made a cuppa and took me tablets. Arthur Itis and angina both a lot easier this morning.

“WC.

Started this diary and did some graphicalisationing (Say that when you’ve had a few drinks?) for later.

I think the stomach is settling a tad after me last mammoth session on the porcelain blocked the drainage pipes perhaps?

I decided to get missen ablated and to chance going to the launderette later.

Getting the laundry ready in the two bags I banged me head on the falling off wardrobe door corner and I think I said ‘Flipping ‘eck!’

I just hope this doesn’t harm me chances of becoming a male model. (Silly mode adopted, I must be feeling better)

I even remembered everything needed to do the laundry this morning… and to collect my prescriptions from the chemist that is handily located next door to the launderette.

Very windy today (both the weather and me rear end).

Big John was already there when I arrived and we had a chin-wag with Big Bertha and she made us a cup of tea too!

He offered to run me to Asda afterwards so I cold get me nosh in bless him.

I remembered to fetch me prescriptions from the chemist next door… and to take some nibbles for the staff.

Doing well today memory-wise and was getting a bit worried about it. Which proved a valid worry, because at the end of the day I’d forgotten to call at the bank re their reminder that me house insurance payments were due. Tsk! Must call tomorrow at all costs.

Got the washing sorted and dried and Big John ran me to Asda (In his car like). Where we split up and arranged to meet back at the tills in 20 minutes.

We both arrived at the same time luckily.

As we left the store the police had just finished dealing with some our numerous shoplifters… not in Nottingham surely?… hard to believe I know. (Hehe) I noticed that they were all female officers and CPO’s – good for them I thought!

BJ dropped me off at home and lifted the heavy stuff into the dump for me, he shot off sharpish as he had a lot of things to sort for the coming holidays.

He’s going to call me later, but up to now he is going to the Papplewick Pumping Station at 1100hrs on Saturday and will take me with him. I’m looking forward to that and thanked him kindly.

I dropped the washing bags upstairs and made sure I’d got me bus-pass with me and set off on a walk to the Nottingham Arboretum in the high gusty winds. It was not cold with them though.

I arrived at the gate and entered the Arboretum drive with not a sole in sight. A bit concerning given that the place is a muggers paradise so I kept what few wits I have left about me on Defcon 2 alert.

As I reached the end of the main drive tunnel into the Arboretum proper, still nobody about.

When I came out of the other end the place was teeming with grey squirrels and I managed to photo one of them near the base of a tree.

Not the best of photographs I know, but then again I’m not one of the best photographers. And I’ve noticed that grey squirrels tend to ignore you when you ask them to stay still for a few seconds so you can take their photograph!

Down the hill towards the pond I waddled. Planning to veer left originally to take a photo of the old Galleon gun ships cannons, but I got distracted (I do that a lot I’ve noticed).

I saw my first person in the Arboretum. A chap sat on a bench with gigantic headphones on (That chap that was, not the bench with the headphones on like) happily listening to his music and shaking his head and legs to the tune, I think he was anyway.

All the way down to the bottom I went without seeing anyone else and arrived at the Pond and me beloved mallards and pigeons unknowingly awaiting their treat from me of meal-worm pellets and birdseed.

There were not so many of them as there were in Bulwell or Arno Hill Park but it didn’t take them long to polish em off bless their cotton socks. Oh, and no Turbo-powered paddling mallard here either.

As I walked towards the exit gates, I noticed some flowers struggling through the barren shrubbery and felt compelled to try and take decent photo of them – as they reminded me that nature can be so determined and powerful as these flowers forced their way into life and survival.

No idea what they were called, but they got me appreciation anyway.

As did my finding and making use of the Gentlemen’s room there.

I hobbled (The feet and knees were getting a bit painful now Tsk) into the City Centre and Tesco’s where I some bread and polish cooked sausages to freeze and last me over the holidays just in case I do get laid up like, or bad weather arrives.

I also got some Fresh Cream French Horns as a treat fer me as I feeling poorly… okay then: ’cause I like so much and am greedy!

 I went and joined the rather long queue at the bus-stop to catch one home. (A bus home that is, not a bus-stop)

A single decker bus arrived, and we were crammed in like sardines again… unfortunately… after a few minutes I felt the ‘phlop’ of a very minute escapage of wind from my rear end.

I did my best to appear nonchalant and kept staring out of the bus windows trying to whistle for an added innocent appearance…

Some of the comments passed between the passengers were a tad cruel. Hehe!

I was pleased to get off the bus and walk home in the fresh air.

I tried one of the cooked sausages that I’d bought – they were delicious. So later it’s a sandwich, sausages and cooked beetroot followed by two fresh cream French horns for me!

I hope… tummy permitting.

Inchcock Today: Wed 17th Sept 14

Wednesday 17th September 2014

I was up and treating me Inch bleeding by 0245hrs. Got some more cheapo bandages coming with me Asda order tomorrow, just in time.

Down and laptop on and cuppa made by 0314hrs.

WC

Yobs walking down the middle of the street at this hour. Slightly inebriated methinks?

I tried the site that Duncan advised me to again, but I couldn’t work out how to get me graphics onto it, let alone save em. Again! Thick? Me?…

Finished and posted me Inchcock Today for Tuesday, and did work on “Nottingham’s new Arboretum Pond-side Cafe/Take Away Opens” post.

Being as I hit the Publish button by mistake for the Preview button, I had to make sure I finished it then by updating. Tsk! Never mind, it took me yonks but I really enjoyed doing the graphic for it.

WC.

Morrison’s delivery came at 0819hrs – all there, no substitutions, and a very nice lady delivering it too!

WC.

I managed to drop me things I was taking upstairs, and twisted me knee trying to stop em falling – now Arthur Itis is toying with me again. Hello, a police car just went passed. A rare sight that.

Came down and sat on me reading glasses.

Laptop a little slow this morning… oh dear.

I put in an Asda order, cause I needed bandages, Cheesey curls and cheapo bleach.

WC.

Got the things ready for the Nottingham Hospice shop and hobbled off out of the house without forgetting anything (I hope).

Called in the GP surgery and booked appointment for 1040hrs next Monday. I could have taken one for Friday, but that’s the day me new modem is to be delivered from BT.

Knees bad again as I struggled into Sherwood and dropped me stuff off at the Hospice.

Mobility Scooters were rampant!

Caught bus into town, had a limp around and called in the library, to work out how to use their computers cause me bus-pass allows me a free hour each week, and with me laptop on its last legs, I could let everyone know by using their email. But no, they were closed down for servicing.

Took me midday medications in the slab-square, thought about giving one to the pigeons… not really like.

They’re erecting the buildings on the square ready for the World War show and display – telling fold how the Nottingham people coped and hat they had to put up with.

I heard on the radio (Headphones yer know), that in 1916 the council made it illegal for anyone to buy a round of drinks in a pub! You were not allowed to even buy your spouse a drink apparently? They interviewed a landlady of the pub who’s landlady was prosecuted for allowing a man to buy a drink for him and his wife.

I hope to get down and have a gander when it starts. I think it’s part of the BBC series: a link here if you’re interested:

http://www.experiencenottinghamshire.com/whats-on/bbc-world-war-one-at-home-tour-p612681

Frid Sat and Sun it’s on. I’ll try to get some photos if I can get there okay.

Caught the bus back, dropped off at Lidl and got some bits – I nearly fell asleep in the queue at the checkout. Good job those behind kept pushing me.

Walked back to the flea-pit and collapsed in pain with me knee and weariness. Put some extra pain gel on em.

WC.

Poor old devil.

Made some microwave sausage sarnies, and took me medications with em.

Inchcock Today: Tue 16th Sept 14

Tuesday 16th September 2014

Up at 0430hrs. No kip much last night, I’m getting irritable now. And that’s not a good idea when you live alone, cause it’s only yourself you can take it out on.

Gawd I hate missen!

Between WC visits I got the laptop going, made a cuppa and took me medications.

Still no luck with getting colour graphics to me posts.

I tried the site that Ratty advised me to, but couldn’t work out how to get me graphic onto it, let alone save em. Thick? Me?…

Got me laundry ready and set off. As I was hobbling along, Arthur Itis stabbed me up me left knee – the worst single pain ever shot through me limbs, and I said: “Well fancy that!” Not exactly but…

Got me laundry done, but I wasn’t in good spirits.

Came back to the flea-pit, and tried again at sorting out what was wrong with me laptop or Coreldraw9 package, waste of me time that was.

Updated me Lochmaben post for the Inchcock site. Mononchrome graphics of cause. But I did a decent one of me at the van with me tackle. (Fishing tackle I might add!)

Decided around 1315hrs, I’d get some more stuff ready for the Nottingham Hospice Charity shop, and take a hobble to Sherwood with it. I just hope the left knee ain’t too painful, if it is still, I’ll have to go see the GP in the morning… well, go get an appointment.

That is if I remember.

Yobs lurking about outside as I left the hovel.

Hobbled with Arthur Itis in my left knee rampant, up to Sherwood’s Nottingham Hospice shop with the bits for them.

Crossed the road and caught bus into Arnold.

I managed to get the last pack of cheapo microwave sausages in Fulton’s foods, then waddled into Iceland and got some lollies.

Managed to avoid yet another mobility scooter seemingly, driven by a drugged or drunk driver as it forced its way through the fleeing pedestrians.

Limped to the bus stop and caught bus back to Carrington. I intended when I got off the bus, to call at the GP surgery to book an appointment, but I stopped to empty me bag of some rubbish into a roadside bin, as I was doing so a car ran into the back of a parked van. The van driver sitting behind his wheel banged his head on it, no air-bag? Anyway, I called the emergency services and went to see if he was alright.

He was fine, but I think he would have liked to have beheaded the driver of the Mistubishi that hit him. Gave details to the police when they arrived, then hobbled home, well tired again.

Not up to doing owt when I got in, so got me head down to try and get some sleep.

Inchcock Today: Sun 17th Aug 2014

Saturday 16th August 2014

Got to bed late last night, still managed to get some kip, and only one getup for the WC (No blood)

I woke up with a searing pain at the left back hand side of my jaw. I gingerly moved my mouth and a sharp pain came for the first three times I tried to move it – on the forth it dissipated, and after a while, no pain at all?

Angina, back passage, Arthur Itis, Reflux valve, Ulcer and Kidneys seemed no problem at this time.

Gorrup and started laptop, kettle on and made a cuppa and pot of porridge, then off to the WC again (All okay).

The laptop had still not started when I got back – I fear the old girl might be on her last legs. (Oh dear!)

Stopped drinking tea from here on today: as I was planning to go and see my Sister Jane, and hubby Pete. I intend to take some photos when I get there, to use in creating a hopefully funny post about the visit.

Set off to the bus stop, caught bus to town.

Caught bus to West Bridgford. Poddled around the shops and bought some vegetable casserole and a rather tasty looking Mushroom Potato caramelised onion meals that appealed.

Walked to Jane’s, via a different route than normal: eventually found my way and arrived.

We had a good natter, and I remembered to take the photo’s Jane and Pete posed magnificently for them.

Took some of their new posh ceiling lamp wot they got, and the three portraits of rams on the wall. Yes, they are of a rather higher class than wot I am yer know.

Eventually I departed, for the long long walk into Nottingham, via a route passed some old haunts.

By the time I’d gone about two miles, me feet and knees were ahurtin’, and I had to find a toilet.

I took some interesting photos though.

In town, I struggled the last few hundred yards to the bus-stop, and alighted on me way back to the flea-pit.

No yobs about, thankfully.

WC.

Finished and Posted blogs, and then just had to get me head down, I wus well shattered.

Sunday 17th August 2014

Up at 0600hrs, after actually getting some sleep in for once. Just a shame I had to knacker missen walking for miles to get it. Tsk!

Still aching a bit in places, but still, at least I got some kip in.

WC, no blood.

Hobbled down and put the kettle on and started laptop.

WC.

Made a cuppa, couldn’t face eating yet. Not like me at all?

Tiredness came over me.

Pete emailed me a photo wot he took of Fuey – their lovely 89 year old in human age cat.

Took me medications, and started to create this rubbish.

I intended to do blogging (or preparation for blogging) all day. Well, I enjoy it yer know, I’m harmless really.

Inchcock Today – Thursday 31st July 2014

Awoke around 0500hrs, and greeted another wonderful day of excitement, jubilation, hopes, dreams, adventure, hysteria, passion and happiness.

Or, if you want the real truth, depression, accidents, frustration, discomfiture, vexation, pain, chagrin, nervousness, fear, loneliness, faux pas and decay. But I wont mention them.

Me hole…

Gorrup and entangled wiv me blog posting graphics and creations.

When I went out to take some stuff to the bins, I noticed the Virgin Media hole in the pavement was gerrin bigger… oh dear!

The cunning step that moves?

Then after feedin’ the birds, on my return to the hovel, I managed to trip ‘Up’ the step to the door. I now have a very pretty scrape down me right shin, and a bruised chin. Oh, that rhymed. Tsk!

Put some cream on me wounds, and while doing so, the tube burst!

Still, it didn’t bleed much, which means me Warfarin level might be a bit low… or is that high? Never mind.

While bending to clean up the antiseptic cream wot I squirted on the floor, Arthur Itis made an appearance in me knees. (Huh, and it had been so good up until then today)

Knees too painful fer meto pick up the seeds wot I split when ups-a-daisying up the door-step wot I swear moved on its own.

Received an email from me mate in America, Andy, with a funny in it that I thought deserved graphicalisating ( I know, no such word, but I like it) a bit:

I wonder who the modelled for the original artist/photographer?

Went off to town to see if HMV had got DVD I ordered in yet. “The Big Job” Made around 1959 I think, can’t find a date on the box. Comedy with Sid James, Sylvia Syms, Dick Emery, Jim Dale and other old comedy actors. Looking forward to watching it later on next week. after a long walk around Victoria Centre looking for the store that had relocated, I found someone official and asked him where it had moved to, naturally had moved to the only part I’d not walked through looking, at the far end of here I stopped and asked the bloke.

Feet humming a bit now, despite this I had a walk around town with the intention of taking some photo’s for putting on here. I remembered to take the camera, but early this morning when I was taking some off of it to put on here, I left the flippin’ thing on and it went flat… oh what a superior nit-wit I am.

Termination of compilation of the days activities at 1610hrs. Will commence tomorrows Inchy Today from that time, providing I remember to, the BT connection does not fail again, and the old laptop doesn’t die a sad death of course.

Made a cuppa and finished this off. TTFN all… 

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