Nottingham Pensioner inspired by Englebert Humperdink’s comeback!

Arnold George Dorsey was born in Madras one of ten children to British Army NCO Mervyn Dorsey, who was of Irish descent, and his wife Olive, who was of German descent.

His impression of Jerry Lewis prompted friends to begin calling him “Gerry Dorsey”, a name he worked under for almost a decade. A name-change to the more arresting Engelbert Humperdinck, borrowed from the German 19th-century composer of operas such as Hansel and Gretel. Dorsey adopted the name professionally.

On 1 March 2012, the BBC announced that Humperdinck would represent the United Kingdom in the final of the Eurovision Song Contest 2012.

Juan found out about this in 2014 during one of his rare moments of awareness.

Henglebert Eumperdink’s return to sing in the Euro-vision Song Contest for England, has inspired the Nottingham pensioner and former Bottle Cork Tester Juan Inchcock to form a musical group from within his Nottingham City Hospital Rehabilitation Group members.

Manager and lead singer of the group Inchcock (69) commented on the forming of the group to our reporter Lint Onitt:

“The group currently consists of Arthur Itis (71), Cis Titus (60), Anne Gina (67), Con Genital (59), Ed Imma (82), Dee Zees (63), and Harry Thmia (63), but of course any one could pop their clogs at any-time, so we have a few reserves to replace them as and when we do drop off like.”

We waited while Mr Inchcock coughed up some blood-laced black gooey phlegm, limped to the WC to pass water, returned looking pale and shaky, smiled, adjusted his hearing aids and then continued:

“Our first recording is a mix of Bernard Bresslaw’s ‘They were making mad passionate love’, Bernard Cribbin’s ‘Right said Fred’, and Morecome & Wises ‘Boom Oooh Yatatata’, with a backing sounding similar to ‘Your a Pink toothbrush, I’m a blue toothbrush’ from Max Bygraves.”

I was flabbergasted, Juan had caught my attention with that statement.

Mr Inchcock scratched at his impetigo, and picked at the welts on his hands for a while, hobbled to the WC again, and returning muttering to himself about the Outer Mongolian Gungo bean crop being down by 2.6% in 1969, rubbed his arthritic knees then added:

“Although some parts of the recording were originally made in 1959, we think this song will impress the younger generation – when we first played it to the Rehabilitation staff here at the centre, they were speechless!”

He struggled to the WC, continuing when he returned covering his flies area with his welt covered finger bent crooked hands:

“And the sound is original too, not many songs out there that are recorded using a bazooka, comb and paper, and live recordings from the operating theatre!

We call our group ‘The Zimmer Frame Squeak’s’…”

At this point Mr Inchcock coughed, went white, passed wind and collapsed in a flabby heap on the floor, and was collected by the porters, carried to the WC and then taken out through the back doors.

Group member Arthur Itis (71) called out “Right I’ll take over now, we’ll do Bill Hayleys ‘Rock around the clock instead now Juan’s clocked out!”

If he survives, we will try to bring you more on this new old genre in music!