Inchcock Today: Sprurghling along… Sat 21st Feb 15

Saturday 21st February 2015

After a night interposed with many uncomfortable rumbling-innards prompted visits to the porcelain.

I forced myself up into physical activity – much against the wishes of Anne Gyna and Arthur Itis.

Pain below me right elbow still with me – no bother from the ulcer, and no dizzies up to now.


Made a cuppa and a pot of porridge with honey and did some Facebooking.


Watched some old stuff TV on YouTube (Heartbeat).

Had a good scrub-up and abluted and noticed that the two front teeth that the dentist had filled had both gone black?


Pondered on if I should try having a walk today or not.

0602swissDecided to risk it ‘for a Swisskit’ (anyone remember that advert for the chocolate bar from… I don’t know when, ages ago?) and poddle to Sherwood to take me togs to the Nottingham Hospice charity shop, then call at the dentists and last to get a small cooked nosh from the hot food place.

0603sherwAs I arrived near Sherwood the sky looked amazing.

Though I’d check me Lotto numbers at the paper shop. After so many years of trying and only getting one win – £10 and that was shared – I can’t think of anything more futile… Huh, nor one number!

Mind you I’m not surprised.

Fortuitously the Library was open and I sated the demands of me rumbling innards in their WC. Phew!

0604msHalfway up the second hill I spotted two mobility scooters outside a shop and none outside the pub which is normal.

I pressed on up and arrived at the Hospice shop and gave them me bits, then up to the dentist. Where I had a Senior Moment…


 I pushed at the door and it was locked, so I read the opening hours on the door and thought well it says here that they are open 0840hrs t0 1700hrs on a Friday… why are they not open now at 1345hrs?

Quick as a flash I got it within minutes – today is a Saturday!

0606aI called in the hot food shop and got a tray of roast potatoes and… er, some meat or other like mince but it wasn’t mince to take home and reheat later.

As I was limping back to the dump I thought I’d take a more scenic route, longer, more hilly but with more trees and that like.

So I did.

I turned right down Haydn Road. As I plodded 0606bdown it the Second Hand Car Sales place that reminds me so much of George Coles Arthur Daley in Minders place from the 70’s TV show.

I don’t think I’d be confident enough to risk getting a car from there somehow.

0606cI carried on down and as I approached the pelican lights a sign that I’ve seen endless times on the side of the road made me smile for once as I saw a funny connotation attached to it today. The sign, behind the red car read: Humped Zebra Crossing…

I bet that made him jump? Hehehe!

0606dI got to the end of the road and turned left up the tree lines hill called Devonshire Drive.

I thought at the time, feeling so much better than yesterday like: “I can do this without any problem!”

And started to ascend the hill with grim determination and a commitment to get to the top in good spirits and maybe jump up then like wot Rocky did in Rocky 3 like…

0606eThird of the way or so up and I stopped to get me breath – but soon started off again showing great spirit bravery and bravado!

So proud of missen I wor.

About halfway up I stopped once again momentarily, the angina starting now and me feet and knees joined in too.

I began to think I maybe made a bad decision in taking this route back to the flea-pit now…

0606gme stick.

Nearly at the top now in this photos.

I realised as I struggled on that I may have seen my last marathon, game of squash, bungee jump or parachute jump as the pains emanating from various quarters of my decrepit ageing flobadob body were increasing in intensity and I needed to get to a WC quicker than I was doing.

Thank heaven the summit was only a few yards 0606haway and I turned right into Carrington and down the hill.

So glad to make it to the porcelain, but the bleeding was back.

I ate the reheated whatever it was meal and enjoyed it – then said a little prayer for it not to start off the rumbling and a-grumbling innards.

As I was washing the pots I managed quite skilfully and without any planning to drop the vinegar bottle right onto me corn on me right foot and said ‘Flipping heck’.

Made a cuppa and limped a little more acutely than normal, up and laptop on, took medications.

I’m so glad I didn’t go on a long walk.

Aye-up… I can feel movements from within…?


Nothing more eaten tonight, lost me appetite.

TTFN all.

Inchcock Today: Housebound Again with Diarrhoea! – Fri 20th Feb 15

Friday 20th February 2015

I really did spring awake this morning around 0530hrs – I laid there thinking how nice it was to remember so much details of the dream I’d just been having – when something happened that sent these facts into the ether of unimportance…

I passed wind and boy what a mess!

While I spent a considerable time on the porcelain I recalled what I’d written on me yesterdays Diary: I haven’t had a single evacuation from the rear all day… bit worrying that!”Never a truer statement has been made!

Oh yes, the Rumbling innards are back with a vengeance.

No moving from the bathroom much for me today…

Got missen cleaned up and refreshed.

Went downstairs and took the bins out for collection so as they will not be missed this week by the gentlemen of the Nottingham Hygiene Collection and Recycling Team.

Made a cuppa and went back up and started the laptop – another call to the porcelain – unpleasant.

Took me morning medications, then returned to the porcelain – where is it all coming/slithering from?

I know I’ve got a rather protruding flabby wibbly-wobbly stomach but how it has held all that is coming out now, I don’t know.

As I washed last nights pots I wondered which of the foods I’d eaten yesterday might have caused this unpleasantness?

Put me togs in soak, and updated this Diary of Woe.

Of course now I can remember nothing of the dreams I’d had. Tsk!


I wondered what had caused this malady to return? The minced beef slices, or the BBQ Ribsteak burger? Or neither?

403ctescoOr perhaps the French Horns. (Being addicted to them, I hope this is not the case!).

No further movements at this moment (0729hrs) but plenty of worrying gurgling and rumblings going on from the innards.

Good job I have a decent stock of toilet paper and other items still to hand 0507from the last bother that I had of a similar nature.

As I went down to make another brew, terrible thirst this morning, me other ailments made themselves known to me:

Anne Gyna, Arthur Itis, Hem Arroids and D.  Uodenal were I think a little envious of the ‘Gurgling rumbles and trots taking the spotlight for once. Hehehe!

0506I took a look in me refrigerator to check the use-by-dates on me food for a family of five stocks.

Suddenly I felt rather ill.

Sat down for a while and was back to my normal self in half an hour or so.

Wonder if this has anything to do with me INR Warfarin level being so low?

Still, on the bright side the haemorrhoids are not bleeding or too painful, I haven’t had a ‘Whoopsidangleplop’ yet today, no dizzy-spells and after the first forced involuntary messy evacuation the other ‘managed’ evacuations have not been as pungent.

Hello here it comes again…

I’m back again, Phwor!

Made another cuppa to quench me rabid thirst.

Now I know how convenient it is having the WC in the bathroom.

0505Updating the diary of woe and somehow managed to lose all me additional writings on me word processor.

I expect it’s something to do with catching the touch-pad that I cannot turn off – gets a bit frustrating and annoying that does, especially when you don’t feel to well. Huh!

Did some Face-booking.

Then worked on a Nottingham Lads Security True Tales of Woe and managed to get it finished and posted of to me blog.

The rumbling brewing and nervousness and expectation of involuntary movements remain.

Managed a pasty and some bread – hopefully it won’t bother the innards too much – oh dear, yes it will…