Arose about 0330hrs and went down to make a cuppa.
I was going to do some porridge in the microwave, but stopped it as soon as the sparks flew from the sides of the door! I found the door edging was corroded. So, no hot food until I get another. (Being frustrated and depressed comes naturally and easily to me you know – Tsk!)
The laptop was upstairs so I returned to update and post yesterday’s diary and have a poddle on Facebook.
Feeling strangely depressed a tad again this morning.
The knees are still not very good, and the Angina… well, not good also.
Got a lot of sorting to do, the launderette; well I’ll have to manage for clothes until next week. Then I’ll have the struggle of carrying two dirty great bagsful down to the launderette. – Not Done!
I’ve got to get to the G.U.M. clinic to book another appointment. Not Done!
I want to get to the Nottingham Hospice Charity Shop with the bits for them. – Not Done!
I’ve got to go to the Computer shop to sort laptop. – Not Done!
I’ve got to sort out a new microwave cooker. – Not Done!
Got to sort the rubbish and put the bins out for collection. – Done!
Oh forget it… I can’t cope with the thought of it all. (Hehe)
I washed the little ‘Inch’ no blood showing at all. Until I pulled at him and it spurted out again. This time I could see the lesion as it filled with blood and then flowed out.
As I’ve said before, thank heavens for kitchen towels!
I went back down and put the bins put out collection, made another cuppa and took me medications.
Then I returned to the laptop. Coreldraw9 is now working in a slow fashion thankfully.
That was until his Coreldraw9 started freezing again! Poor old little mite that he is, he’s so down and sad again now. Tsk!
Thursday 13th November 2014
I sprang awake at 0130hrs and could not get back to the land of nod. Tsk!
So I decided to go down and bring the laptop up to work on me blog and post some photo’s of Lynton from his visit yesterday.
I got all the bit and pieces up okay – but could I find me camera?
Could I ‘eck as?
After searching the front room draws shelves floor etc and failing to find it – I searched the kitchen (that’s the only downstairs rooms in the house), then decided I had lost it completely. Bamboozled and annoyed with myself puts it lightly.
So, I decided to give up and fetch the things back downstairs. On my way up the stairs (An hour and a half after starting me searching) I saw the camera laying there – and naturally then remembered leaving it there last night to bring up later. (Huh, wotta plonka of the highest order!)
I managed to get em ready. Then tried to load the internet and the laptop beeped then froze on me. I had to press and hold the start button then reload/start the laptop.
But it’s been alright since?
Big mouth Inchcock! Grrrr…
Coreldraw9 keeps freezing, and I have to force close the flipping laptop, done it three times this morning. Oh woe is me, well down now. Tsk!
Did some work on a new post for a while, during which I felt the dreaded warm and wet sensation from the little ‘Inch’. Bleeding again… Hey-ho. I can’t go to the clinic today because I’ve promised to go with Sister Jane to the hospital for her to have checks on her knees and hips done. Bit of support yer know bless her.
Good job I got some graphics done earlier to use.
Also I said I’d try and take some photo’s today of the older parts of Nottingham for the TFZ group. So I’ll aim to walk to town in plenty of time to meet Jane at 1315hrs at her bus stop, then catch bus to the Queens Medical Centre, and take some on my way.
Spit and polished myself check Inchy (dribbling) and got things ready to take with me to meet Jane, I hope?
Set off on my walk into town planning on taking some pictures en route for the TFZ’ers site – but the knees were so bad a diversion would have meant me being late to meet Jane and Pete.
I couldn’t resist taking a photograph of the poor chap as I passed from outside of Pound World, who they had dressed up in Snowman costume and had apparently been hired to wave at the children?
Got into town and met them, we then caught a bus to the QMC arriving in plenty of time.
They both looked in good form, but Pete’s hearing is getting as bad as mine at times. We had a good natter while waiting and Jane was called in early for her tests.
They were completed in half an hour and we caught a bus back to town. I took some photo’s of them on the bus, I don’t think Jane was too pleased about it because the lighting on the bus changed her hair colour in the photo.
I hobbled along with them while they did some shopping,
Said our farewells and I caught a bus back to the dump.
When I got in all I as good for was getting my head down after applying more pain gel to me knees.
Bob Chapman, Terry Hennessey, Pete Hindley, Bob McKinlay, my favourite John Winfield were in Forest’s defence.
Jim Baxter, Henry Newton, Ian-Storey-Moore were in midfield.
Joe Baker, John Barnwell. and Barry Lyons up front.
All mismanaged so ably by Johnny Carey
1969, and my mates begged me to stop going to Forest matches!
Mick said I was a ‘jinx on them’.
Bill said I was the ‘kiss of death to them’.
Frank said I was a ‘curse on them’.
Alf said I ‘cast an evil eye on them’.
They each suggested I go forth and multiply and questioned my parentage.
They then pointed out that I’d only been to 6 matches that season, that resulted in:
Versus Man United Lost 2-1
Versus Derby County Lost 1-3
Versus Leed United Lost 6-1
Versus Burnley Lost 5- 0
Versus Leeds United Lost 4-1
Versus Coventry Lost 4-1
… and could I please stop attending the City Ground? (Or words to that effect)
I laughed this off as rubbish.
The next season, after I attended my first match (And only match of the season) versus Arsenal, and they lost 4-1… I did stop attending the City Ground after that!
I slept better last night, only waking up about five times I think.
Up and on the laptop drinking a cuppa by 0445hrs.
Not feeling on top form though, took some bags out to the bins to find someone had dumped their rubbish bags nearby.
Bit of an early dizzy spell.
Going to spend the day indoors methinks. Working away on the laptop and feeling guilty.
Gaws ‘eavens – the little ‘Inch’ is bleeding profusely again!
Crappo at times life innit?
Wednesday 12th November 2014
I was feeling nervous when I awoke at 0120hrs, apprehensive.
WC.
Checked out ‘Inchy’, bleeding again, applied some more Corticoid cream.
Had a rinse and cleared up the blood and came down had a sip of spring mineral water and got medications ready for the 0500hrs doses.
Can’t believe I do not fancy a cuppa.
Aware that today I have visitors coming to assist me, and I am very nervous at what they will find here at the hovel.
Updated this diary to here.
Lynton and his son John called, they were stuck on the motorway and would be a little later than arranged – nice that.
They arrived and I felt I’d known him for years.
We gossiped while they helped me get the laptop going so much better. We left it doing a clean-up programme and they drove me out for a bite to eat in Sherwood.
They kindly went into the Computer shop with me to analyse and understand what the chap was offering.
See me smiling? Thanks Lynton!
Then we went into a cafe where they treated me to a bacon sarnie, and let me knick one of John’s potatoe waffles.
We returned still nattering to the flea-pit.
They helped again by taking away some of the rubbish I have accrued.
They will never know how much they have helped me today – bless em both with all my heart.
A cuppa tea and they were off with fond goodbyes.
Sir Lynton Cox – A Gentleman
Now John has got my wi-fi sorted I can use the laptop upstairs again, and it is so much quicker.
Had a microwaved potato and sausages for me nosh.
Tired, but feeling happier than for a while I went off up to kip… angina playing up. Tsk!
The Chief Constable is posing for press photographs while Sergeant Gaztops sulks because they wouldn’t let him attack with hand grenades and nerve-gas
Hostage Drama at Nottingham Junior School
Police responded with dogs, helicopter, and ARV (Armed Response Vehicle) to a call for help, from the Sebastian Zulqurnain Junior School in Nottingham this morning at 0928hrs.
Officers sealed off all roads surrounding the school, apart from the one to the bookies and local pub. (Best not to upset the locals quoted the firearm bearing Traffic Warden Mike Steedenski)
A statement from the Nottingham Chief Constable Danny Soz-Poncemby said: “Twice last week, teachers and pupils reported suspicious characters lurking in the close vicinity of the school they knew they couldn’t be locals because they were not searching through the dustbins. It seems the same two have gained access to the premises, and when the teacher demanded they left and they refused, a hostage situation then developed.”
Sergeant Gaztops wanted to attack the school with hand-grenades and nerve gas, but we managed to calm him down with a Valium and gin mix and a promise of sex with the schoolmistress.
Our reporter Juan Inchcock asked: “Do you think that the intruders might be paedophiles?”
The Chief Constable replied: “Oh yes, I’d not thought of that!”
He turned to one of constables in riot gear next to him and commanded him to get more support and call for another CPO (Community Police Officer) to attend the scene, as soon as he’d finished having his breakfast.
Talks ensued, with one of the children via their Samsung Galaxy S2 mobile phones and the police negotiator.
At this point the burger can arrived and was allowed through the barricade so the officers who were keeping back the local muggers, shoplifters, gunmen and children absconding from their schools, could partake in food. Much to their delight.
No further details were forthcoming until 1430hrs, when it reported by the Chief Constable in a statement:
“I am glad to inform you that the hostage situation at the Sebastian Zulqurnain Junior School in Nottingham has been settled without any injuries this time.
He stopped to comb his hair, snuff out his roll-up and pose for some photographs to be taken by the press then continued:
“Both of the Police Officers abducted by the pupils were shook up, but released relatively unharmed after I agreed that no charges would be brought against the children. The graffiti on the headmistress’s door would not be cleaned off for 5 months, and the use of Ganja would be permitted in the playground for fifteen minutes a day during school time.”
He added as the Pizza and Burger vans pulled away:
Feeling a bit down again. Despite Lynton emailing me that he is coming over to see me with his son next week.
Did the LOMM update posts and some graphics for Troll Free Zone.
Waiting for the Asda delivery, then I’ll get washed shaved teggies and WC then get changed to go to the Queens Medical Centre for my INT level tests.
When I came down from ablutionising (Is there such a word?) my left thumb was bleeding from all around the nail! No pain, no lesions?
I took some bits with me for the Nottingham Hospice Charity Shop to drop off on the way back from the Queens Medical Centre.
I set off and caught the bus (Raining you see) into town. Then got another out to the QMC.
The rain has lessened as I arrived at the hospital.
Only a couple waiting at the haematology dep’t, and I was in five minutes later.
There was only two staff on. The new girl and a bloke brought in from another department – three staff off today she said! She also pointed out that i had blood coming from my left ear-hole?
Still she was happy could she could have first pick of the nibbles I took for them, including the fresh cream éclairs that tickled her fancy.
I was soon out and caught a bus into town.
Had a walk about a bit, got some DVD’s to add to the stuff got the Hospice shop.
Ambulance/CityWalked into town and as I rounded the corner, the first thing I saw was somebody being loaded into an ambulance.
That cheered me up no end.
The rain had stopped and the sunshine glistened. So I took a photo in the slab square.
Then walked towards the Sherwood bus pick-up point taking a photo pf an alley as I passed it. In this alley is a Barbers, a public convenience, a ladies hair dressers and a few other retailer. Not doing so well I’d hazard a guess by the lack of people around.
I caught the bus and dropped off almost opposite the Charity shop and took the bit in for them.
Then I had a walk back to Carrington, the angina still bothersome.
And I foolishly didn’t put any Phorpain gel on my knees cause they seemed okay at the time – When will I ever learn!
Nearly got ran into by a burke on a bike on the pavement as I turned the corner into my street.
Got in. WC’d.
Laptop on and made a cuppa.
It’s colder in this house than outside! Huh!
Felt that warm wet sensation in the region of my little Inch again, went up and checked. Bleeding. A good day for me bleeding today innit – me left thumb, me left ear and now my ‘Inch’ has started again. I checked the ear-hole closer and I think the wax or ear-drops might have hardened and when I put me hearing-aids in it might have caught it and pulled a bit off?
I’m looking forward to be nosh tonight (and hoping it come out alright like). I’ve got two big potatoes to do int microwave, then I’ll empty the flesh into bowl and bash it up with some cheese granules a splash of vinegar and a tad of sea salt, then return it to the microwave add some bbq sausages and rewarm it.
I’ll let yer know how it turns out later. I might have a bit of cooked beetroot with it. Egon Ronay? Huh!
Felt that warm wet sensation in the region of my little Inch again, went up and checked. Bleeding. A good day for me bleeding today innit – me left thumb, me left ear and now my ‘Inch’ has started again. I checked the ear-hole closer and I think the wax or ear-drops might have hardened and when I put me hearing-aids in it might have caught it and pulled a bit off?
Nottingham Health & Safety Executive have closed stalls down at a local Charity Fair, that was being held over the weekend, in support of the Lithuanian & Bulgarian Immigrants Benefit Claiming Association Inc.
The Council’s Chief Executive Akhtar Abdul-Hafeez, told our reporter: “They were in breach of Nottingham Health & Safety Chief Executive’s guidelines”.
The small fair, held on the Enoch Powell Park at the end of Mandela Maze, on the Prakesh Housing Estate, had been running for only one day, when officials arrived to assess the stalls, and decided to close down many of them.
Amongst the defaulting stalls that were in breach of the Council’s H&S regulations and closed down, were reported to the H&S Executive as:
The Coconut Shy:
Stall-holder: Name withheld due to MI5 and MI6 instructions.
The balls were made of wood and were considered too dangerous to use, and may have been acquired by the local youths in readiness for the next Nottingham riots.
We offered to allow the stall to remain open if they would use ‘screwed up paper towels’ in place of the wooden balls, but the stall-holder showed no interest in this idea.
Closed Down by the Health & Safety Executive
The Hook-a-duck Stall
Stall-holder: C. Senor – Restaurant Proprietor
We considered the depth of the water the plastic ducks were situated in was too dangerous at 5 inches.
Also after laboratory tests we also found the water to be contaminated with nub-ends, phlegm, Sangria and Tapas powder.
Closed Down by the Health & Safety Executive
The Rollercoaster Mouse Ride
Stall Manager: Mike Steedenski – Unemployed Big Issue Seller
Bearing in mind the possible dangers and high risk of accidents involved in this ride, we considered that there was too few translated warnings of the dangers on the list provided in: Pakinstani, Romanian, Polish, Gaelic, French, Bulgarian, Indian, Iranian, Senegalese, Nigerian, Outer Mongolian, Senegalese and Egyptian to ensure the safety of the multicultural local population of Nottingham.
Mr Steedenski seemed unperturbed by the decision as he continued to snog with his Manageress Shirley Blamey.
Closed Down by the Health & Safety Executive
The Bingo Stall
Stall-holder: Earl Lee Riser – Retired Milkman
It was decided that because the numbers were being called only in English that a possible public disturbance may ensue from the non-English speaking clients.
The stall-holder was unable to comply with our request for him to call out the numbers in the 14 dialects we requested him to.
We were concerned about the Local Arboretum Pond caught Grilled Stickleback Ribs in Nettle leaves being sold on this stall. Although they tasted alright when our inspector tried one, within seconds he ran off to the toilet, and has not been seen since. Ms Marsh Mellow denied having him imprisoned at her home.
Warning Issued by the Health & Safety Executive
Accident Claim Specialists Stall
Stall-holder: Sue Emall – Solicitor for League of mental Men Association Legal Services
After 15 minutes of observing this stalls activities, it was recorded on camera that the staff (A Mr Danny Soz and Mr Gaz tops were seen laying trip wires across the pathways between the stalls. Planting land-mines in the vicinity. And breaking up pavement slabs on the pedestrians entrance. Luckily only a Big Issue seller and unemployed Gas lamp wick trimmer was injured.
Closed Down by the Health & Safety Executive
The Health & Safety Investigation team claimed the reason for their selectivity of which stalls to close down, had nothing to do with the bribes of money, sex and free candy-floss offered.
My mates were away on holiday, so I wrapped myself up in a great coat, scarf, flat cap etc (It was very cold as you would have gathered, if not please pay more attention – thank you).
I took a beef dripping sandwich, apple, and bar of Punch chocolate, and set off to the match on my own.
There was a big crowd, and I made me way to the East stand at the front wall, behind the dug-out.
At half time, I struggled through the crowd to get a Bovril drink, and somehow managed to get back to my spot without spilling too much.
Just as I was biting into the apple, a surge of bodies forced me and everyone else nearby, to be squashed up against the low wall, fearing another surge coming from the yobs behind, I threw away the apple and Bovril cup in an effort to free my hands to use to help stop me being crushed against the wall.
At which point I found myself being man handled and dragged over the wall by two nice policemen, who gave me a dead-leg, crammed my arm up my back, and frog-marched me into the car park, and secured me in the back of an Austin black maria!
I stood in the cage in the back of the black-maria, confused, about what I might have done to warrant being here?
Occasionally, the doors would open, and a protesting yob or two would be forced into joining we already squashed up inmates in the cages.
I could hear that the match had finished, and after about half an hour or so, the doors opened again, and some police officers accompanied by a couple of police dogs pulled out a few of the incarcerated, me included, into the car park, and suggested we go forth and multiply!
Presumably those still in the van were to be prosecuted, we in the car park were cautioned.
I found out much later, why I was removed from the ground. A neighbour had been standing near to where I was on the East stand, and had seen it all happen, and explained it to me: As I was being crushed involuntarily into the wall by the surge of fans behind me, the apple I threw away to allow me to use my hands to protect myself from the wall, had landed on a policeman’s helmet!
Ah well, at least I understood why the bobby had dead-legged me, and caught my head on the cage door twice as he implanted me in the black-maria now.
Just how is Britain’s miniature answer to Ebola doing today?
Nervous, uncertain, cold and weary!
Sunday 9th November 2014
Bad night for waking up every few minutes it seemed – and fretting over something different every time.
Gave up and got up at 0250hrs.
Laptop took ages to start.
Made a cuppa and returned to it – Internet freezing again. Restarted twice. All three active blue lights on all the time now.
Third loading it is working… reluctantly.
I’m sneezing like a good un this morning.
Got loads of graphics done for the TFZers.
Coreldraw is not playing up now? Apart from the not letting me save of course. But still, in confuses me why.
Very cold this morning now.
Morrison’s order came, no substitutions.
I’m going to get myself beautified, sanitised and prettied-up and take the camera for a walk into Nottingham. Oh, and of course well wrapped up – me that is not the camera!
I attended the Remembrance service at St John’s, and came away slightly thoughtful but depressed as usual.
Being a Sunday (See how quick I was there?), not much traffic on Mansfield Road as I set off on walk into the City Centre.
As I arrived there, still not much traffic, but plenty of Nottinghomian’s lurking alarmingly about, as well as cyclist, mobility scooters, street performers and big Issue sellers as well.
I poddled through town to the South end and went in Sainsbury’s to get some bread for the birds.
I went down to the Nottingham canal and as I was feeding them I realised or rather remembered that it was now banned and I risked an on the spot fine of £65!
So I threw in the rest of the bread quickly… during which one of the animals shat down me left trouser leg!
I was not feeling too good, a bit dizzy and lifeless so I made towards the City Centre to catch the bus home.
On the way I nipped into the pound shop and got another bag of bird seed – that I will have to remember to use in Derby not Nottingham.
Walked through town, taking a picture of buildings and nice sky.
Hobbling now, I struggled to the bus-stop. When it arrived and I got on it, I took a picky of me leg and the bird poop!
Back at the Steptoe & Son hovel, WC, laptop started and made a cuppa.
Microwaved potatoes tonight, with some BBQ sausages methinks.
Do you know, I can’t figure out why I feel so low… Tsk!
How is Inchcock Today? – Nervous, worried and confused!
Friday 7th November 2014
I woke up regular as clockwork every 30 minutes or so all throughout the night.
I felt more tired when I eventually got up at 0330hrs than I was when I went to bed. Tsk!
Noticed message on phone from Brother in law Pete asking what time I would be at their place today. It rally is so sad that I’d forgotten I was going?
Texted back asking if 1200hrs is okay. I kept mobile in me pocket so I might not miss any reply.
Took bags out to the bins and moved them into the pathway ready for collection.
No frost this morning, just dank and drizzly.
Cuppa tea, medications and on laptop at 0400hrs.
Took some photo’s when I got there, and we had a natter of sorts.
Caught bus back to town then another to Carrington.
Not feeling too well at the moment.
Saturday 8th November 2014
Oh dear me – came down and found I’d left me freezer door wide open all night – Huh!
Five black bags of fodder now in the dustbin. So I’ll have to go out and get some replacements later.
Amazing, Coreldraw is letting me open without going through the recent clicking of warnings it indicated. Still not letting me close it properly but still.
I got tons of graphics done while I could.
Cyber-friend Lynton messaged me, I really appreciate this, but sometimes I am embarrassed and ashamed with how I exist. And find communicating any other way than the internet hard.
The internet Google Chrome kept closing on its own accord. Maybe this is the end. I’ll find out when I get back from shopping.
I decided to get out and buy some fodder from the freezer shops. Might go to Bulwell where there is three to pick from for the best value.
Caught the bus on Hucknall Road
The rain was heavy throughout the journey.
Got to Bulwell and called in Iceland. They only had the tasteless lollies in so got one box. Along with some microwave baking potatoes.
Then to Fultons. Got some flavoured potatoe halves.
Then to Heron got some different potatoe halves there.
Caught the bus back to the flea-pit.
WC.
Then I updated this then tried to work on Chrome to post it. It loaded very very slowly.
Then opened the Inchcock wordpress site, again very slow loading.
It let me post this anyway. (Slowly)
So I tried to do another one and see if it stayed hospitable.
Not bad, slow but working anyway. Bit like me really. Hehe!
