Month: February 2015

Inchcocks Security Career True Tales of Woe – Rapid Alarm Response – The Bank Manager’s Activation

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Inchcock’s True Security Career Woes

Rapid Response Alarm Officer Inchcock & The night of the Bank Manager’s Home Alarm Activation

0302

I was on Alarm Response and Patrol checks this particular night. Anyone could usually tell when I was on these duties because the amount of alarm activations usually doubled when I was on this roster. Tsk!

About 2345hrs I was in Long Eaton near Derby carrying out one of the regular site checks when I got a call to inform me that an alarm had been activated at a house in North Nottingham. I knew the house as it is on our Patrol list for checks at the weekends, and owned by a bank manager.

I made my way towards Beeston then onto the ring road when I got another call from the controller to advise me that a second activation had been received making it a positive and the Police had been informed, but they told him that “We have no free units to respond, but will do when one is free.”

Nice… very encouraging that.

I arrived at the assignment address about 30 minutes after getting the call. A great big house with two gates and dozens of rooms.

I informed control of my arrival and that no outward signs of intrusion seen at the front and I was going to check the rear of the premises first.

I got the keys and codes from the van safe, locked the van, took a deep breath and walked to the back of the sprawling house.

1220hrs: I moved away from the window and informed control of the suspect on premises situation and he despatched the other patrol officer Darren as back-up support being as the Nottingham Police still had no one to send.

So I waited and observed monitoring for any activity.

I then saw the torchlight in a ground floor window and continued my observing.

Daz arrived asking where is the scum-bag, let’s gerrim…

After we gained entry through the front door and deactivated the alarm

Darren called out “Alright scum-bag, let be X#~♫ having yer… come on give up or my mate will come and get yer…”

I recall thinking ‘Oh no he wont!’

A bloke appeared though a door and came running at us calling out “I’ve called the police… he pulled up short and lowered his mashie niblick when he saw our uniform and the size of Darren… who did not take to be attacked and he belted the chap with left-hook of Henry Cooper quality.

As I was about to challenge Daz on why he clobbered him as it was obvious the chap was not an intruder but the bank manager when the door behind us burst open and the police officers entered, batons drawn and wrestled me an Darren onto the floor and we were hancuffed – I remember a canine officer being displeased with his animal when it licked me on the face when they were getting me up after being handcuffed.

Now we were in a pickle I thought.

Luckily my solver tongue explained what had happened in between my asking then telling Daz to keep quite.

The paramedics arrived and the bank manager was taken away for checks although he seemed alright, was very quiet and didn’t seem to hold any grudge against us?

When the officers and Darren had left, I did a check of the premises for any intruders, I could see the fuse box was open at the cellar head, so assumed that was the reason the torchlight was used? No signs of why the alarm activated were found and it reset without any bother later.

When I checked each room upstairs the third bedroom… well it opened my eyes I can tell yers… A four-poster bed with red and pink adornments, leather straps, handcuffs and a giant plastic prodding fork lay on the bed? Five TV or monitor screens were scattered around the room, and a gigantic mirror on the ceiling! No signs any bodies anywhere though.

Then I informed control all was clear and reset the alarm and secured the premises.

Sat in the van doing the incident report – one of the hardest I’ve ever had to do.

The Barclays bank manager didn’t complain at all – which was puzzling and unexpected, but comforting.

Wonder what he was up to on his own?

Inchcock Today: Hypodermic into his ticker

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Thursday 19th February 2015

Last night I had braised beef in onion gravy with soft bread followed by a yoghurt ice lolly, mousse and my medications. Mmmm!

But the wind… of dear, very persistent and noisome putrid pestiferous poohs meritorious of the Houses of Parliament… that bad! Oh dear…

I got up late at o540hrs and beautified missen ready for me extra Queens Medical Centre Haematology INR level test.

No blood from me rear-end, gel on me knees and ankles and the bruise on me head was almost gone.

Made up a bag of nibbles for the nurses, made sure I’d got umbrella, bus pass, INR record card, cash, reading glasses, hearing aids etc.

Set-off in the rain so caught a bus instead of walking to town in case I gotted soaked again like on Monday.

0400

Chocolate Pound on the left next to a real Pound coin

Popped into the chemists first to pick-up me blood-release tablets that they had ran out of when I picked up me monthly dollop of medications, and had a bit of fun with the girl on the counter that went down very well and all four of the staff laughed with or at me:

When Safira gave me the bag of Trental tablets, I pretended to read it and saying out loud “Oh one pound eh…” Then produced my earlier prepared gigantic chocolate pound coin and handed it to her. A lovely grin came over her face and she turned to the others and showed it to them and wallah… everyone laughing at the same time.

I really got satisfaction from that.

0402qmc

Patients having a fag out in the rain – addicts each and every one – Bless em!

Bus out to the QMC where on getting to the entrance I was tickled to see patients outside, some in wheelchairs some on drips, outside having a fag under the No Smoking signs. Bless em!

I was soon seen to and the samples taken and had me injection of Warfarin straight into me ticker and was back out into the rain and on the bus back into town.

Swallowed me midday medications then I took a photo on the bus through the front window but for some reason found it was far too blurred – again – to use?

403bcity

Evenin’ ‘all!

Getting the shakes is not doing my photographicalisational reputation any good at all!

As I dropped off the bus the Police paddy-wagon had pulled up a car and three plain-clothed officers were trying to ejecting the occupants.

The incident took place in front of the bus-stop my sister uses.

0401a

Plenty of buses in Nottingham this afternoon competing with the ebullient Nottinghomian citizenry for the right of way…

Wonder what they’d done?

I didn’t ask like.

I poddled up the stairs (Painfully) to the walk-over (Muggers paradise) to take a few of shots of the wonderfully, pleasant, happy, merry, joyous, contented, sweet, kind, philanthropic Nottinghomian’s on Upper Parliament 0401street in the rain.

Took a walk through the open market, but is was bereft of any choice, many stalls unoccupied and the owners of the stalls were obviously not happy as they glared at people as if to say “Yes.. you dare disturb me!”

403ccity

John Lewis Department store window today

I had a wobble though the rest of Victoria Shopping Centre and the first window I came to as I entered it was the High Class (Claimed by them anyway, the prices Are high) John Lewis department store windows.

I was intrigued by the display  windows I must say, felt something was missing like…

I noted some shoppers coming into the centre who were absolutely soaked through.

0403city

Me attempt at an atmospheric piccy

So I nipped back to the walk-over to take a photo in the heavy rain in an effort to try and get another atmospheric one.

It didn’t come out like that really, but it did catch some more Nottinghomians crossing against the lights. Oh it didn’t… the lights must just changed as I took it – Huh!

Hehehe!

403ctesco

One of many of Inchcock’s Weaknesses

I wandered to Tesco and managed to get some cheesy seaweed and gravy granules, then had another losing fight with my conscience over whether to purchase some fresh cream French Horns or not to purchase some fresh cream French Horns…

I purchased some fresh cream French Horns. Tsk!

I slipped the pigeons some seed on Trinity Square as I made me way to catch the bus back to Carrington and the flea-pit.

Got rather wet between the bus-stop in Carrington and the front door.

WC’d hurriedly.

Got changed and put two beef slices in the microwave and made some rich gravy and poured it over them when cooked – had some bread and sauce with em followed by the fresh cream French Horns. (Guilty mode adopted)

Had a scrub-up took me evening medications while continually coughing sneezing and passing wind.

Watched a Heartbeat DVD while I ate me nosh.

I haven’t had a single evacuation from the rear all day… bit worrying that!

Tired out now poor mite that I am…

Inchcock Today: Nottingham Hospice Charity Shop Visitation. Wed 18th Feb 15

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Wednesday 18th February 2015

Up at around 0500hrs… realised I’d missed me last nights medications… and took me morning medications.

Couldn’t recall the dreams I’d had just knew I’d had them?

WC’d – lots of blood from the rear cleaned up. Arthritis fair, angina flaring a tad, haemorrhoids leaking and a new pain in right arm around the elbow? Coughing sneezing and emissions from the back exhaust persistent. Tut!

Started laptop and finished and posted yesterdays diary. Then finished iff me Security Woes post about the Turkey Farm and posted that one to Inchcock on WordPress.

Remembered Iceland coming later and I must sort the camera for taking to the Nottingham Hospice shop afterwards Spent a while doing some graphic work and then facebooked a bit.

0301Another record form arrived from the hospital reminding me about tomorrows appointment for an extra INR level check.

Went down all clean and polished to wait for the Iceland man. Started me second less powerful laptop that will not handle Coreldraw or Serif draw and did some work on Apache and then the Iceland-man commethed.

I put the stuff away, not easily though I’d got that much the fridge and freezer are even more crammed than ever now.

Made sure I’d got the camera and bits for the hospice and set off on me walk there.

Fed the pigeons and set off on me poddle.

0302Passing a house on Watcome Circus I remembered attending years ago when I was on Security Mobile Patrol Alarm response and took a photo of it because I thought I’d do me next Security Woes about that night and can use the photo again in it.

At the time of the incident the house (Now flats/apartments) was owned and lived in by a bank manager who’s bank paid for the security response and patrols for him. I’ll say no more it might spoil the Tale of Woe.

0303I walked up the hill and onto Mansfield Road and down towards Sherwood.

The sky looked nice, but the wind was biting despite the sun coming out often during me hike.

Down the hill passed the traffic lights and realised I’d left me cards at home. That shouldn’t matter though as I wont be needing them for the cash or bus… would I?

At least it’ll stop me spending for once.

0304As I carried on up the next hill I noted that the Nottingham Reptile Centre had a new sign outside with their name on it – the satirist in me thought I could take a photo of that and put Osborne or Cameron’s (Chancellor and Prime Minister) face on the poster and post it on Facebook? Perhaps to the Funny Site.

What do you think?

If anyone would like me to, I can do one with the face of any politician for you if you like and email to you.

0304fbHere’s the idea what I thought of after I’d doctored the original photographicalistion like.

Not that I have anything against the unelected ministers or their spoon-in-the-mouth wealth or their nepotism nihilism or sybarite lifestyles in the least.

In fact I think they should have more notoriety and fame than they have already conned cheated lied and been handed… something like being the first Government Ministers to be launched into space… or hung for treason something along those lines like.

I digress, sorry back to the diary.

0305Up the hill and to my astonishment to gentlemen of Eastern European looks pulled up in front of me in a van at a road junction, with the back end of their van sticking out about 6 foot into the road where they had just turned from.

A bus driver expressed his derision at their parking and honked his horn as he could not pass. The unshaven and rough looking 0305apassenger went into the beer-off, and I could not get across the road, not that I wanted to like – I was hoping things would develop as the bus-driver was gesticulating at the un-road-savvy nerks… Eventually the white van man pulled forward hitting the car parked legally in front of him to make way for the bus to pass.

Then reversed and nearly hit a bloke who unlike me who waited, he walked behind the van into the road to get over the road.

0306This’ll be good I thought as the man approached the driver – but in seconds the drivers mate returned and they were off in a flash.

As I got to the Nottingham Hospice shop I had a dizzy-spell, first one in ages – shook me a bit.

I explained about the camera to the lady 0307and gave her the other bits and noticed some ladies footwear on sale and decided to take a photo for Patti Caroline and the TFZ gals.

It (The photo) came out very blurred though, perhaps a side-affect of the dizzy-spell?

As U left the store I noticed these dresses? in the window. I’m curious if anyone can help in what type they are?

Backup_of_Lynda5Made me way down the hill into Sherwood and on my way noticed a pavement cyclist crossing the pelican lights on his bike and up the pavement on the other side, narrowly missing clobbering an elderly lady as he did so.

I’d like to mention that this sort of activity from cyclists doesn’t bother me in the slightest.

WWarnLie

0308Further down the hill, and a private hire car had stopped in the bus-lane on double-yellow lines to go into a shop and two buses were stuck behind it.

The cab driver came out of the shop rubbing his beard and didn’t acknowledge the hooting form the traffic at all and calmly drove off.

Gawd I love Nottingham folk.

0311I resisted the smell from the take-away food shop, and started my way up the hill when I thought a miracle took place! A cyclist came passed me from behind making me jump (Well… I say jump?) and I called after him and got me camera out and… wait for it!… he got off his bike and started pushing it!

I was amazed at this, it has never happened before… then I realised he was two-thirds of the way up the hill and must have been knackered so that must be why he got off it?

I pressed on up the hill, the knees starting to twinge a bit now, but no more dizzies thankfully.

0310Then I came across my first piece of Nottingham Street Art of the day.

The legs from a toy doll – and feet away (Not sure how but I missed this off the picture…Tsk!) laid a plastic head of David Cameron?

What the artists intention was to create I don’t know. Hehe!

Up to the top of the hill and down into Carrington, and turning right at St Johns Church the site of the flowers forcing their way through up from the graves these little blue and white flowers made me again appreciate nature.

0312As I looked up Church Drive I saw four chaps having an altercation over a rear-bump in their cars – and decided to take the long route to avoid them.

I couldn’t tell what they were saying as I didn’t know or understand the language they were spitting at each other, better safe than sorry I thought.

0313As I got to the corner of my street I came across my second piece of Nottingham Street Art of the day, that was not there when I left the house.

I pondered over it a bit – and thought maybe it was created as a protest over the nearby cable television lines that had been vandalised and pulled out by the local yobbery? However the significance of the dog pee to the right of it left me puzzled – that is of course if it was canine pee?

Anyway I think it is as good as the rubbish bag display that they had in the Tate Gallery a few years ago – of course it will not be worth the £70,000 that that piece of art sold for I 0304fb2suppose.

Limped to the dump and hastily hobbled to the porcelain.

Here, I had a very very minor Whoopsiedangleplop – I bent down to rub some Phorpain gel into me kness and cracked me head on the sink.

Lucky it was only me head really – then another dizzy that couldn’t have come at a better time than me being sat-down at the time like.

I waited a few moments then stood up and all signs of the dizzy had gone, and tended to me tender rear area – still a tad nervous going down the stairs though.

Had a small Pork and pickle pie, a flake and a cuppa and started the laptop to do this diary update.

Make a cuppa and took me medications.

Tired again, must remember me extra INR check tomorrow…

Inchcock: Guarding the Turkey Farm Episode

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The Nottingham Lads True Tales of Security Career Woes

Guarding the Turkey Farm Episode

AC001thermI was posted one November, to a farm near Kinoulton in Nottinghamshire, assigned to protect the Turkeys being fattened in time for Christmas – of which many had been nicked by the naughty Nottinghomians.

As usual the assignment instructions were vague and lacking in detail.

When I arrived, it turned out I was required to drive between two location throughout the night, and try to count the Turkeys to ascertain if any had been stolen, and secure the premises and report it if they had.

One site was on the farm, and had 50 birds, the other site was at an old graveyard the farmer had bought, and was using temporarily as a hold for the birds, this one held 38 birds.

I was given an old Land Rover to do the patrols in, and offered the use of a kitchen in an abandoned cottage to get refreshments, and do my ablutions.

The farmer said he would be checking with me regularly throughout the night.

Counting turkeys is not easy.

I found the best way was to creep silently as possible up on them, and count them from a distance. Once they were disturbed, it was all but impossible to count them.. and the noise!

On about my third visit to the graveyard site, I could count only 49 birds, so I radioed in with the details, and parked under a tree to observe the site for a while in case anyone was still on site or might return for more birds.

I counted them again after about half an hour – and found there were now 50 birds!

Confused, I was determined to sort out this anomaly, and again counted them, 49 this time!

I entered the gate, and disturbed the noisy birds, in an effort to assess just how many there were. As I was doing this, the owner arrived and we did a count together – there were 49 again this time!

He joined me in the Land Rover to observe the site. He offered me a drink of Jameson’s Irish Whiskey from his quarter bottle. Tempted as I was, I had to refuse.

He told me that he too had found different counts during the same day.

We entered the fenced off graveyard once again to count them, and that was when I saw the mausoleum top, and broken down door in it!

The Turkeys had been going down into the vault, making the count vary!

The farmer was well pleased, and we drove back to the farmhouse, and he fed me with bacon, eggs, and home baked bread, with a strong cup of tea! Thanked me again for sorting it out, and was very happy.

AC02I returned the next night for my duties and checked the mausoleum gates and doors first – and detected some movement in the darkness from the top of the mausoleum, being fit and foolish in those days (Nowadays I’m just foolish) I climbed up onto the top, RT in hand and found two turkeys clambering around.

I was relieved that it wasn’t an intruder, but puzzled as to how they managed to get up there – and how was I to get them down again…?

As I stood there pondering about these things a solution came all on its own accord…

The roof collapsed and me and the turkeys were transported downwards landing inside the building… When the dust had settled I made out the shape of the farmer as he stood over me.

I was no longer in favour I could tell, then as I tried to stand up the coffin I was unknowingly standing on disintegrated… the farmer was no longer happy.

Not one of my best nights in the Security industry that…

Inchcock Today: Tue 17th Feb 15 – Launderette Day

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17th February 2015

Bad night, woke up shivering many times.

Dreamt of working in a security gatehouse with other officers and trying to get out to do a patrol but everything stopped me – forgetting keys and codes – getting lost on the gigantic spread out site – being RT’d back to the gatehouse – sinking in the mud… ended up trying to climb a fair wheel, no idea why but fell or got lost on it every-time… weird but I think I’ve had this dream or one similar before?

Got up latish 0630hrs – made a cuppa took medications and put water heater on – started this diary up to here.

Noted we had a red sky this morning through the drizzling rain. Red sky in the morning – Shepherds warning as me Dad used to say. That reminds me, I’ve got a shepherds pie in the freezer.

Titivated myself then got the laundry things ready.

Made up the nibbles bag for the launderette girls and BJ.

Set off to the launderette, chatted up Griselda (Another failure there) and set about doing me washing.

Taking out me bag with the book, lavender scented soap-bubbles, softener and drier balls I became aware of an extra strong scent of lavender present – the bubbles had burst and soaked me book into unreadability! I was on the last chapter too… Curse!

Then BJ noticed that none of the six machines belting away had any water in them and called Grizelda, who at first seemed puzzled then realised she had not turned the water on – so several customers were not happy.

The driers took £3 this week – we think the owner had cut down the time or temperature on them.

0201 Just a bit of fun added to this photo

BJ and I had a natter and when we were a lot worse off financially and the washing was done BJ put all the bags in his car and we set off for Asda.

0202Some incident had occurred near the school and we were sent away on another route by the nice policemen who seemed to really appreciate having their photograph taken…

We arrived at Asda and parked-up at one of the almost full Disabled Parking Only Bays – BJ checking the cars out to see if any able bodied louts had parked there.

I should mention that BJ is a registered 0203Disabled Blue Card Badge holder.

We split up to do the shopping and I made for the gardening section and got some pots of weed-killer first thing. Why do I always think of George Osborne when buy weed-killer recently?

Then I spent a fortune… microwaveable beef ribs orange juice, mousses, yogurts, bleach, mini Swiss rolls, burgers and frankfurters to mention a few.

I went through the self-serve checkout and had to ask for help a few times. Thus attracted the well known expression from the girl that said “Why do these old twits come in here?”

0205We were soon back at the dump and BJ handed me the bags from the car and shot off, me thanking him profusely for his help.

WC’d.

Put the clean laundry and nosh away… all bar the microwaveable BBQ ribs. I ate them with a cuppa and some bread.

A letter arrived, it was the results from the INR Warfarin level tests – far too low so I’ve got to go back again on Thursday for another test.

Still emitting wind coughing and sneezing a bit today. Although it’s hardly worth mentioning the passings of wind I’ve had them for so long now I almost expect them and am learning to accept the olid, noxious aroma that they distribute. I can’t try charcoal tablets because they may absorb the other medications I’m on?

On the bright side (What’s that?) no blood from the rear-end although sore, Anne Gyna has been very fair to me today, Arthur Itis as normal, ulcer no bother and the cut lip is healing well.

I realised then I’d not taken me bits to the Nottingham Hospice Charity shop in Sherwood. Tomorrow if  Iceland is not too late I’ll take them I hope.

Feeling tired now… poor old chap eh?

Inchcock Today: Mon 16th 15 – Back to the Hospital

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16th February 2015

I didn’t get to sleep for yonks last night despite me exhausting walk wot I took to the Arboretum yesterday.

Woke up well tired still.

WC’d.

No tablets to take due to me error in taking me morning lot last night… confusing meself now.

Laptop on to finish and post yesterdays Diary and started this one.

Thought through me tasks for the day:

QMC INR level tests at the haematology department. Must get the nibbles packed up for the nurses, Record-card already in crossword book in bag.

Meet Pete at noon at his bus-stop.

Get back and sort things for the Nottingham Hospice Charity Shop and take them in.

Got myself cleaned, medicated and polished and set off for the walk into town.

Oh boy shiver me timbers and cor blimey governor was it raining? Is the Pope a atholic? It was belting down!

I had a ponder for a while: Should I get a bus into town and pay £2.50 for the pleasure? (It was well too early to use me pensioners bus-pass). Or should I risk walking and hope the rain eases a bit?

I decided to risk it as well as keeping Arthur Itis’s joints moving thought it a good idea.

0101wetWhatta-mistaka-to-maker!

I was well wet within a few hundred yards of me walk – the rain had started to fill me bag, (Luckily the nurses nibbles were well wrapped up in an Icleland carrier bag) me new shoes were leaking, and halfway up the hill the floodwater was unavoidable by the buses and several unpleasant drenchings took place.

I just hoped that the rain would not get through me new coat into me mobile phone and/or camera.

Out of desperation I used me Pound Shop umbrella, that dripped (Obviously) into me bag, down me already soaked legs and me shoes like.

I squelched on into town and caught a bus out to the hospital within minutes.

Getting from that bus into the hospital (About 400yds) through the torrent of rain that decided to come down as I got off the bus was not nice. I got in though the entrance to the foyer area and had to shake off as much rain as I could before going in proper, as did many others.

Me poor old tweed Andy-Cap was absolutely drenched and I decided not to take it off cause I knew from experience that putting it back on again would be farcical.

I got to the haematology and only one person was there and I was in, gave them their nibbles, blood taken and out in a matter of ten minutes tops.

The rain had eased a lot when I came out and crossed over the road to catch a bus into town to meet Pete.

When I arrived in town I realised that it was far too early to wait for Pete in the rain and rang him to see if he could come any earlier – as I didn’t fancy going back to the bomb-site then coming out again to get re-soaked. He said no, he’d see me at the agreed time and I should go in a cafe for a cuppa and wait.

Fair enough I said. But no way was I gong into a cafe for a cup of so called tea… have you ever found one that served tea that didn’t taste like warm brown distilled water?

0102JI was outside Jessops department store so thought I’d go in and have a wander around in the dry and warmth. I went up to the top floor and started working me way down nosing at things and pretending I could afford them like.

0103JThey had some artwork on sale but nothing that attracted me, not my style really – apart from one piece that is of a stone built cottage in the hills of somewhere or other that I thought was a decent effort, a very decent effort… then I saw the price of it… £120 (USD$184.45, CAD$229.98, AUD$237.17 Euro€161.74, JPY ¥21860.95 a little too much for me..

0104busPete rang back to say he was on his way and would be there in fifteen minutes, then I had find me way out of the store? It took a while… Tsk!

As I poddled down the stairs I found that through the windows I could take an overview shot of the crossing on Milton Street below – so I took one to the left of the traffic then one to the 0105crossright of the crossing.

I think they show the weather as it really was although the rain had eased off by then a bit.

Got out into Victoria shopping mall and made me way to the exit and passing the Thornton’s store I espied some chocolate shaped like a Champagne bottle at £5 a go and thought sister Jane would like one for Easter maybe, so I went in and bought on. The young chap asked what I’d like writing on it… I must have given him a confused look and he repeated himself slowly. Then it dawned that they write a message of one’s choice on it in white chocolate… I got there in the end (Attracting the now much used “Poor old devil” look from him. I asked him to put Jane and some kisses which amused him but he had the nous and manners to turn around before laughing. (The tell-tale sign was his shoulders going up and down yer know… hehehe)

I met Pete and he said Jane wanted to know where the shop was that got the seasoned roasted seaweed for her, so we had a poddle around for a bit. We passed where the 19 year old lad had been murdered and there were hundreds of floral tributes on the lampposts. So very sad I decided not to take a photo out of respect.

The Chinese shop on Goose Gate was an Alladins Cave to Pete. We got some seaweed and then went to another Asian shop around the corner – but what a difference, mouse droppings, out-of-date stuff on sale and staff that looked and leered like they were tongue members.

0106GCI left Pete at his bus-stop but not before he took a photo with me camera of me with a wet barren atmosphericalisional background.

I poddled to me bus stop and caught one back to Carrington, calling in the public gents on the way.

Back in Carrington I popped into the Co-op and got some bread-thins then hobbled in the rain to the dump.

WC’d, kettle on, laptop internet on, made a flask of good strong tea and set about creating this diary.

Too late to take the stuff to the hospice… well I mean too wet really.

7-11-14 7-11-14bDuring which I realised I’d not taken a photo of Jane’s Champagne bottle that I meant to earlier. Huh! So I rang Pete and asked him to take one and email it to me please.

He did bless him, he took two: Here they are.

Notice the brickwork in their front room, spot on and classy – yer can see Pete was a brick-layer can’t you.

Mash and sausages for nosh methinks tonight.

Inchcock Today: Incorporating Inchies Mammoth walk to see his beloved Mallard ducks

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Sunday 15th February 2015

I yet again sprang awake at 0520hrs this time, passed me morning medication time but still.

WD’d, then made a cuppa and a pot of porridge and took the medications.

Spent a good few hours trying to get my head around Serif Draw x6 without much progress. Doing lines on text involves many more steps than in Coreldraw9 and to delete a guideline needs six steps opposed to just selecting and pressing delete in Coreldraw.

0701Got missen washed and brushed up and set off on me walk to the Nottingham Arboretum to see the mallards and pigeons.

Around the first corner at the end of the street I managed to avoid whoopsiedangleplop on some Canine Nottingham Street-Art, presumably designed with the assistance of their pet hound – judging  by the ‘Spread’ of the artistic blobs the owner must have been in a rush and forcefully pulling the poor thing along?

0702The view looked like somehting out of an old black and white picture as I wended me way through the jitty onto Mansfield Road.

Sneaking some seeds to the pigeons as I whistled and looked up to the sky – then saw yobboes lurking near the passageway so took the long route as I didn’t feel too comfortable about the 0703three lads drinking and shouting about something or other.

As I was walking down the road a 1962 Ford Zepher passed by, saw it coming so had time to grab me camera to take a photo of it. Gloriously memory tweaking seeing that, they were converted for Ford by Farnham Estates and very few were made. A rare treat to 0704see one nowadays, and the engine sounded in good nick too.

So I looked ahead and took a photograph of where I had to walk to get on me way to the Nottingham Arboretum.

Straight on to the traffic lights on the corner of Hucknall Road in the distance on this photograph.

Got to the traffic lights and took a photo of the next stretch of Mansfield Road down to the traffic island at the junction of Gregory Boulevard alongside the Forest 0705recreation ground.

A fair but of traffic around considering it is a Sunday.

The weather still a bit gloomy, but not me. I was feeling surprisingly perky at this stage, the ailments not too bad… apart from the angina but I can’t have it all ways can I now.

Pressed on singing away to meself to traffic islands and turned right.

0706To the pedestrian crossing you see in the picture and crossed over it and started to walk along the side of the recreations ground.

Where they are building something new for the kids, it might be football pitches perhaps.

IMG_0022Took a photograph of the piles of grit and sand stacked all over the old field because I thought how they looked like mole-hills… Giant mole-hills. Hehehe!

As I turned to carry on me walk no less the three police cars belted passed en-route towards the City Centre with their Blues & Twos activated.

0707A few yards further along Gregory Boulevard I turned down a path into the recreation ground, seeing these cars parked where they were, you can understand it, the sign is not big enough and they are Nottingham folk after all said and done!

Bless em!

IMG_0024I walked passed the cars and into and across the Forest ground on the footpaths you can see int picture, and up the hill to the right.

Half way up i stopped to catch me breath a bit, but moved n without resting as a rather large dog on its own was coming up behind me and showing its teeth!

Up the path opposite almost to the end of it and then I turned right up an old cobble-stone path steeply rising to the top and Waverley Street.

IMG_0025As I looked up the path I began to regret taking this route a bit… but the cobble stones first erected as a road  surface must have been designed so the horses could get a good grip when pulling drays and trams on the main roads.

Damp as it was, I didn’t slip on the hill at all.

When I got to the top of the hill Arthur Itis knees were complaining.

It was not too cold and there were very few folk about anywhere up here on the hill top.

IMG_0026I had a look at the memorial plynth for the local WW1 soldiers lost.

It’s been renovated and looked almost new – I fear with it being out of the way vandals may visit it soon with their grafitti or worse.

But I was soon recovered and crossed over and down Waverley Street passing 0708the tram stop for the Nottingham High School buildings.

“Ah… this is better!” I thought, downhill to the Arboretum gates.

Still uncommonly quiet, so much so it made me nervous, bearing in mind I was on my way down this hill to go into the place where I was mugged last year.

Shudder!

0711No one about at the entrance to the grounds (Mind you there wasn’t last August either).

I emtered and started to walk down towards the duck pond and saw several squirrels on the grass near some bushes.

I took some photos but for some reason they all came out very smudgy and blurred. A bit disappointed with that, but the least bad one I’m posting here – if you could have seen them with your own eyes you’d have been fascinated like 0713wot I was I think.

They seemed to be playing with each other like children.

Sorry about the quality or lack of I should say.

I walked through the trees where I was set-upon intentionally so as to break any lingering fears I thought.

Hobbled (And by now I Was hobbling) Down and around to the ponds edge and despite 0712everything felt grateful that I could still get about and so many interesting   things for me to do locally – but mostly so glad I had remembered me free pensioners bus-pass to use to get home later.

I opened me bag of meal-worms ready for the Mallards and got the seeds ready 0714for the pigeons and walked around the pond to the spot where they can get out and to the food easily.

I fed the little mites getting joy and satisfaction from dong so – I’m easily pleased.

I’m amazed at how well the mallards always seem to get on with the pigeons, cause mallards are not known for their passive nature are they?

The Aviary had now got some birds in the cages, no idea what they were but they had attracted a 0716good few folk sat watching them.

My final visit in the Arboretum was to my favourite few square yards of unkempt land near the gates at the bottom of the hill end.

The wild flowers that grow here get me admiration for how they not only survive but seem to flourish against all the odds.

Nature at its best this patch.

I walked into town down Waverley Street and 0717along Shakespeare Street on my way to Tesco to see if they had any cheesey seaweed in stock.

As I passed the Central Fire Station I looked up at the building – not a good idea as it happened and I stubbed me toe on the kerbside – Cursed, and .replied I was okay thank you to the kind young man with the gloves on who asked me if I was alright.

IMG_0037Called into Tesco, they had one packet of me seaweed left so I snaffled it.

As I came out to go to the bus stop I caught another Nottingham pavement cyclist and a few more Nottinghomians crossing the road against the lights at the same time. Naughty!

Caught the bus back to the hoppit.

Met neighbour who told me that a coach of visiting students had been attacked by a gang as it drove through Broxtowe earlier today. That might have been where the police vehicles I saw were going?

Got in the dump, WC’d put the kettle on and WC’s again? Oh dear…

I had six microwave sausages and some instant mash, followed my a lemon yoghurt.

WC’d, then started to update this diary.

Then made a big faux pas.

I took me morning medications in mistake for me night medications, well six of theeighboum before I realised. Then took me night medications with the Warfarin, but avoided those that were to be taken morning and night if yer see wot I mean like? – Tummy-ache within half an hour but still here. Tsk!

Must remember tomorrow INR tests (I’ve already put me record card in me bag ready so I don’t forget it again) Then I’m meeting Pete at 1200hrs at his bus stop in town.

Forget? Me?…

.

Nottingham News to encourage Tourists

/ Inchie / 8 Comments

Nottingham News to encourage tourists – February 2015

Comments in green are by Inchcock

Shanay Walker murder accused pleads not guilty

A woman accused of murdering her young niece and cruelty offences has denied all charges against her.BBC02a

Kay-Ann Morris, 24, from Nottingham, is charged with killing Shanay Walker, who was found dead at a house in the city’s Bestwood Park area in July.

Ms Morris, of Beckhampton Road, is also accused of cruelty to Shanay, in 2012, along with the same charge against two other children, in 2011.

A second woman has also been charged with cruelty towards the girl.

Juanila Smikle, 53, of Easegill Court in Top Valley, Nottingham, has been charged with cruelty to Shanay and to four other children, dating back to 2011.

Both women appeared at Nottingham Crown Court earlier, and were remanded back into custody.

A trial date has been set for 15 April.

Horrendous!

Inspectors criticise Nottingham prison violence and poor conditions

Three wings of prison had to be locked down for three days because of ‘prisoner ill-discipline’, report reveals.

Emergency measures had to be taken to stop Nottingham prison from spinning out of control because of unrest among inmates last September, inspectors have revealed.

Nick Hardwick, the chief inspector of prisons, said that a week before a snap inspection in September, three wings at the prison had been locked down for three days “because of what the governor described as prisoner ill-discipline”.

Get caught for the crime – do the time… no longer applies it seems.

Nottingham paramedics quitting as stress levels reach crisis point

It comes as stark statistics reveal that the number of paramedics resigning and taking daysBBC0001 off work with stress has nearly doubled in the last four years.

A total of 87 paramedics have resigned their posts already this financial year, with 6,325 calendar days also taken off work with stress – a huge rise from 47 resignations and 3,151 days off in 2010/11.

And health experts say the workload in the service is just not sustainable.

Not glad to read this in my condition…hehehe

Crackdown on Nottingham’s problem with illegal cigarettes

BBC02aBootleg, counterfeit or smuggled cigarettes sold cheaply line the pockets of crooks.

And Jane Bailey, trading standards manager for Nottingham City Council, said: “There is an issue with counterfeit cigarettes in Nottingham and we are working with our partners within the police and Her Majesty’s Revenue and Customs to tackle the problem. We would always urge anyone tempted to buy a packet of cheap cigarettes from a dubious source to think again.

A criminal activity surely brought about by the Governments over-taxation of the tobacco products?

Mansfield murderer Susan Edwards loses appeal

BBC02aA woman who spun a web of lies over 15 years after she murdered her parents and buried them in their own back garden has lost her appeal against her 25-year minimum sentence.

Susan Edwards and her husband Christopher, killed her mother and father, Patricia and William Wycherley, in Mansfield in 1998.

They then spent the next 15 years living off more than £280,000 of the dead couple’s money and creating an ‘elaborate charade’ to make people believe they were still alive.

The pair were jailed for life at Nottingham Crown Court in June, after being found guilty of the murders, and were ordered to serve at least 25 years each behind bars.

They should not have been given an appeal surely?

Three men arrested after a city centre fight which led to the death of a man have been charged and are due to appear in court

BBC01Muhamad Adnan, 22, of Middleton Boulevard, Nottingham, Callum Levi Ibrahim, 22, of Belfry Way, Edwalton and Azeem Khan, 28, of no fixed address, will be at Nottingham Magistrates Court on Tuesday morning.

The arrests were made following a fight in Thurland Street, just before 4am on Sunday morning, in which Joshua Bradley from Bulwell died as a result.

A 24-year-old man will appear at crown court, charged with the murder of Bulwell boxer Josh Bradley.

Richard Johnson, of Belton Sreet, Hyson Green, appeared at Nottingham Magistrates’ Court on Thursday February 12.

Wearing a baggy plain white t-shirt, dark blue trousers, and with his hair in dreadlocks, he spoke only to confirm his name, date of birth and address.

Johnson, who turned 24 just two days ago, stared at his feet, as the judge read the charge.

I wonder if found guilty, will he be given a suitable sentence? Oh of course not, we don’t hang murderers any more do we… just give them a few years being fed and free of financial worries for them then let them out to kill again…

Nottingham ‘loner’ jailed for home-made grenade

BBC0headA loner who lives with his parents has been jailed after police found a home-made grenade in his bedroom capable of exploding and injuring people.

Andrew Bird was sentenced to two years at Nottingham Crown Court on Wednesday, February 11.

The device, containing more than 100 pieces of metal, was found when his home was searched by police investigating him for harassing a 21-year-old ex-girlfriend.

As a result jobless Bird was convicted of harassing her and given a suspended prison sentence.

Nasty piece of work – a suspended sentence – Huh!

Shoplifting mum fined after stealing twice from Sainsbury’s

BBC02A mother-of-two has been fined for shoplifting twice from the same supermarket.

Sabrina McLean, of Longmead Drive, Arnold, stole alcohol and food from Sainsbury’s in Arnold last month.

The 30-year-old pleaded guilty to theft at Nottingham Magistrates’ Court and was fined £75 with £60 costs.

Marlene Domrynski head of the Nottingham Police Retail Crime monitoring team said: ‘In January we had an increase of 65% in shoplifting in Nottingham, this is pushing our resources to the limits.’

It’s rife nowadays!

Shoplifter spared prison and given chance to reform

BBC02aA former heroin user has been given a chance to reform despite shoplifting weeks after being released from prison.

Gareth Freestone, 34, stole two bottles of aftershave worth £50 from Wilkinson in the city centre on January 22.

He pleaded guilty to theft at Nottingham Magistrates’ Court yesterday asking for 18 previous shoplifting crimes to be taken into consideration and was given a 12-month community order, where he must carry out 120 hours of unpaid work. He must also pay £150 costs. Freestone, of the YMCA in Shakespeare Street, was last jailed in November for a similar offence.

Defending, Emma Wyborn said he had previously used heroin but had been clean for five months. She said he stole the items to pay for “everyday things” as his benefits payments had been complicated by his time in jail.

Reformed?

Nottingham Serial Thief

BBC02aA serial thief stole more than £1,000-worth of goods from shops over the course of four months – as well as stealing hundreds from his 87-year-old grandmother’s bank account.

David Brooks, of Manor Road in Eastwood, appeared at Nottingham Magistrate’s Court yesterday after admitting a total of 14 offences, including 11 thefts.

The court heard that the 34-year-old had stolen items such as perfume, joints of meat and a set of knives from shops in Eastwood and Giltbrook between September and January.

He had also stolen £380 from his grandmother’s account using her bank card, and admitted one count of fraud by false representation.

Brooks also pleaded guilty to two counts of failing to surrender to court bail.

Sentencing him to 22 weeks in prison, suspended for 18 months, chairman of the bench Keith Burd said: “We’ve given you quite a good deal. I want you to be under no illusion that if you fail to comply this time, you will not get a forth chance and you will go to prison.”

Scum!

Nottingham murderer still on the run.

BBC03Convicted murderer Mark Stoner-Seed is still on the run more than a week after absconding from jail – despite a nationwide manhunt.

The criminal, who torched a Nottingham house, killing a teenage girl and severely burning another woman, has been missing since Friday, January 23.

He had been released on a temporary licence from a prison in South Gloucestershire, but failed to return.

The 52-year-old is originally from Bestwood Park, and killed 17-year-old Christina Bunning when he set fire to a house in Forest Fields.

I’ll keep me eye out for him…

Two thefts from pay and display machines have been reported, one in broad BBC001daylight, in The Park.

Thieves plundered a pay and display machine by the Ropewalk at 3.15pm on January 11 and a theft from a machine at the same address was reported at 10.07pm on February 9.

In the local area crime update from Nottinghamshire Police, it was reported that a “serious number” of tyres were slashed overnight in The Park between January 28 and 29.

A burglary, two thefts from vehicles and another theft were all reported.

It was also reported that a “serious number” of tyres were slashed overnight in The Park between January 28 and February 5th.

Four burglaries, two thefts from vehicles, one mugging, one stabbing an attempted rape and another theft were all reported.

And The Park is a posh area of Nottingham!

Inchcock Today: Whoopsiedangleplop Day!

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Sprang awake at 0300hrs – urgent call to the porcelain replied to. Only a bit of blood this morning.

Sat there and some bits of memory of me dreams came back, so I wrote em down and put the laptop on to start this diary and record them.

I was lost in no man’s land on a battlefield, possibly a WW1 one – totally unconcerned at the shells and bullets falling all around me… I was looking for a bus-stop… fell down a shell hole crater and seemed to land on a subway station that was filled with American dressed folk – but all the people were talking in a tongue I didn’t know and I could not ask for directions as they didn’t understand me… I took a pork pie out of me pocket to eat and everyone stood back in shear panic… a policeman came up and shot me in the chest, I told him that wasn’t very nice was it? He then hit me with his baton and put gloves on and took me pork pie – I found myself in a very large American holding cell with tough cookies giving me the eye and closing in all around me, I passed wind and they all collapsed onto the cell floor and I was to be electrocuted as a punishment but no one could find the outlet to put the plug in to charge up the ten-slice toaster they had to execute me with – then I was in a submarine?

Hey-ho.

After finishing yesterdays diary I made a cuppa and took me medications then did some Facebooking and graphicalisationing.

WC’d.

Went down to make another cuppa and suffered a slight ‘Whoopsiedangleplop’ down the last three steps of the stairway – it could have been a stairway to heaven but I somehow managed to grab the rail in time, of course that meant I had to drop me tray with me cup, swabs, cutlery and milk on it… what a mess!

After checking on me knocks, cut lip and bruises I cleaned up the mess, swore and made another cuppa.

FrankCrutchReturned to me laptop and finished titivating an old graphic about Frank Jordan for his birthday and posted it to Facebook.

Put some gel in me sore lip, and Phorpain gel on me knees and hands, and cream on me bottom.

Arthur Itis not too bad at the moment, even Anne Gyna is in a good mood too!

WC’d.

Made a cuppa and started to install Seerif Draw x6 on me laptop.

Had my midday medications.

Installed okay, then I read the manual £14.99 (Just that it was in such small letters) combined with online help and started to get used to using it.

JanetAaron

Original Coreldraw9 graphic

WC’d.

Managed to import an old graphic and toyed about with it to get used to option etc. and posted them side by side on Facebook. The orignal graphic and the one redone I’d doctored today – while I was mildy pleased with the results, it took me flaming hours to do with the earning curve stuttering here and there like if yer know what I mean.

Drawing1jpg

Doctored using Serif Draw x6

I’m still unsure if I’ll be capable of mastering Serif enough to to create things from scratch like I can on Coreldraw9 when it lets me and doesn’t keep crashing.

Well weary after all that concentrationing.

Had a beef pasty and microwave chips fer nosh, then continued me self-teaching lessons on Serif x6 – tiredness forced me to stop.

Took me evening medications with a drink of spring water.

Had a shave and did me teggies, then ran a lovely hot bath with Radox, antiseptic disinfectant and washing up liquid in it – why you may ask washing-up liquid… I knocked the pot into the bath when I got in, Huh!

A good scrub up and cleansing took place then I soaked for a few minutes before the often excruciating getting out of the bath procedure took place, accompanied by the usual verbals like, Argh… Ohohhohhhooo, Argh! Carefullll, and Ouch!

Struggled out and just about to feel a bit proud of the effort when I felt me glasses break as I trod on them.

I swore.

They must have fell off the WC where I’d left them easy to hand like, but of course I didn’t hear them fall.

I dried myself off noticing how me wobbly bits were getting markedly more wobbly. Applied the dermatological cream all over, the haemorrhoid cream and Phorpain gel on me knees feet and hands.

Back on the laptop to do this diary to date.

Too tired to do much now, tried to watch an old Boon episode on YouTube – after I think it must have been the forth time I nodded off I gave up.

Inchcock Today: Hospital with Sister Jane

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I fell asleep (at last) early last night – sprang awake at 0300hrs and for the first time in ages could not remember having any dreams.

WC’d, bit of blood from the rear. Knees and hands not to bad with arthritis, ulcer okay, angina a touch bothersome and ticker beating away like a good un. The escapages of wind continue unabated however.

Made a cuppa, started laptop and finished yesterdays Diary and worked on some graphics and facebooked a bit.

Took my medications aware that I missed last nights so I can expect a bit of bother of some sort today. Tsk!

Must remember to ring Sister Jane later to confirm what time she wants me to meet her at her bus-stop in town to go with her on her appointment at the Queens Medical Centre.

Also must take out bins for collection, call at the GP to collect prescription and after going with Jane, I must call at the chemist for me monthly medications.

Rang Pete early and confirmed he and Jane would be going and I could meet them at 1315hrs at their bus-stop in the City Centre.

WC’d.

Made another cuppa and had a pot of porridge. (By gum I live well)

Forgot to take me bin out – Tsk!

Titivated myself and set off remembering to call at the GP surgery for me extra prescription – which they took a while to find, it was with my monthly prescriptions that the chemist had not collected yet. Hey-ho. I took them all down to the chemist as it was on me walk into town anyway.

Bit drab this morning with the odd spot of rain but not too cold at all.

0501As I was half way down Mansfield Road from the cemetery I thought how sad the row of shops looked across the road.

I pressed on and got into town and made my way to Argos to see if they had any mini-cookers in – they hadn’t – so moved towards the bus-stop where I was to meet Jane and Pete, and noticed 0502yet again the Nottinghomian’s habit of ignoring traffic and pedestrian lights as they crossed over the road against red lights again. No wonder the cyclists on the pavements don’t interest them.

Had a go at me crossword book while I waited in the bus-shelter for Jane and Pete.

They soon arrived and we walked to catch the bus to the QMC.

We set off and were soon at the hospital, very early for Jane’s appointment but they still came and took her in for the x-rays (That’s not the word she used but it I’ll forgotten the word).

0503Jane was out in 6 minutes and we were out walking to the bus-stop to get back to town and I took a photo of them.

Pete took one or more of Jane and me on his camera phone, I’m still awaiting him to email them to me.

In town I walked them to their bus-stop and had a poddle to Friar Lane and the Asian food shop, where I got some of the cheesey seaweed.

0504Then walked through the slab square in the city centre where the Nottingham Wheel was being well used, despite the rain now a little heavier.

I think I might treat myself soon and have a go one it to take some photographs?

Two police vans were outside Primark again. Shoplifter?

Walked up to Victoria centre the Trinity Square where I got a photo of some ‘bling’ in the jewellery shop window for the TFZ gals, much to the consternation of the lady inside.

0505Yet again as I passed the lights on Upper Parliament street the precious little Nottingham citizenry were still crossing against the lights.

Caught the bus back to Carrington and hobbled to the dump, got to the door and realised I’d not collected me prescriptions from the chemist – just as the rain got heavy again. Limped to the MedTrentalchemist and collected me sack of medications and returned to the hovel. They said they couldn’t get any of me Trental blood release tablets but would have some for me on Monday.

WC’d.

Sated me hunger pangs with 2 beef slices, a tin of potatoes and followed them with yoghurt and a mousse.

Laptop on, took me medications and started to update this diary.

Again I have a feeling I’ve forgotten something today…?