Inchcock Today: Whoopsiedangleplop Day!

Sprang awake at 0300hrs – urgent call to the porcelain replied to. Only a bit of blood this morning.

Sat there and some bits of memory of me dreams came back, so I wrote em down and put the laptop on to start this diary and record them.

I was lost in no man’s land on a battlefield, possibly a WW1 one – totally unconcerned at the shells and bullets falling all around me… I was looking for a bus-stop… fell down a shell hole crater and seemed to land on a subway station that was filled with American dressed folk – but all the people were talking in a tongue I didn’t know and I could not ask for directions as they didn’t understand me… I took a pork pie out of me pocket to eat and everyone stood back in shear panic… a policeman came up and shot me in the chest, I told him that wasn’t very nice was it? He then hit me with his baton and put gloves on and took me pork pie – I found myself in a very large American holding cell with tough cookies giving me the eye and closing in all around me, I passed wind and they all collapsed onto the cell floor and I was to be electrocuted as a punishment but no one could find the outlet to put the plug in to charge up the ten-slice toaster they had to execute me with – then I was in a submarine?


After finishing yesterdays diary I made a cuppa and took me medications then did some Facebooking and graphicalisationing.


Went down to make another cuppa and suffered a slight ‘Whoopsiedangleplop’ down the last three steps of the stairway – it could have been a stairway to heaven but I somehow managed to grab the rail in time, of course that meant I had to drop me tray with me cup, swabs, cutlery and milk on it… what a mess!

After checking on me knocks, cut lip and bruises I cleaned up the mess, swore and made another cuppa.

FrankCrutchReturned to me laptop and finished titivating an old graphic about Frank Jordan for his birthday and posted it to Facebook.

Put some gel in me sore lip, and Phorpain gel on me knees and hands, and cream on me bottom.

Arthur Itis not too bad at the moment, even Anne Gyna is in a good mood too!


Made a cuppa and started to install Seerif Draw x6 on me laptop.

Had my midday medications.

Installed okay, then I read the manual £14.99 (Just that it was in such small letters) combined with online help and started to get used to using it.


Original Coreldraw9 graphic


Managed to import an old graphic and toyed about with it to get used to option etc. and posted them side by side on Facebook. The orignal graphic and the one redone I’d doctored today – while I was mildy pleased with the results, it took me flaming hours to do with the earning curve stuttering here and there like if yer know what I mean.


Doctored using Serif Draw x6

I’m still unsure if I’ll be capable of mastering Serif enough to to create things from scratch like I can on Coreldraw9 when it lets me and doesn’t keep crashing.

Well weary after all that concentrationing.

Had a beef pasty and microwave chips fer nosh, then continued me self-teaching lessons on Serif x6 – tiredness forced me to stop.

Took me evening medications with a drink of spring water.

Had a shave and did me teggies, then ran a lovely hot bath with Radox, antiseptic disinfectant and washing up liquid in it – why you may ask washing-up liquid… I knocked the pot into the bath when I got in, Huh!

A good scrub up and cleansing took place then I soaked for a few minutes before the often excruciating getting out of the bath procedure took place, accompanied by the usual verbals like, Argh… Ohohhohhhooo, Argh! Carefullll, and Ouch!

Struggled out and just about to feel a bit proud of the effort when I felt me glasses break as I trod on them.

I swore.

They must have fell off the WC where I’d left them easy to hand like, but of course I didn’t hear them fall.

I dried myself off noticing how me wobbly bits were getting markedly more wobbly. Applied the dermatological cream all over, the haemorrhoid cream and Phorpain gel on me knees feet and hands.

Back on the laptop to do this diary to date.

Too tired to do much now, tried to watch an old Boon episode on YouTube – after I think it must have been the forth time I nodded off I gave up.

Leave a Reply