Go fortheth with caution as you begin life,
It’ll be full of hum-drumness, with trouble and strive,
Keep yourself fit for your maidens, perhaps soon, your wife,
But getteth as much rump-pumpy and nightlife,
And sexual encounters aplenty, nightly or twice,
No work tommorow? them make it thrice!
If you seek the young flesh of a buxom lass,
Gereth in there, be as bold as brass,
Treat her reet, and fill her wineglass,
Don’t rush the removal of her girdle,
Caress her as you manipulate her petticoat,
If it’s the bosses lasseth though, beware,
Do not let him catcheth you both sweaty and bare!
No keyhole peeping at the bosses maiden,
Whetheress she’s big, little, celibate or even single,
Cause ifeth the chief catches you, with passion ladened,
And the pair of you about to comingle,
You’ll getteth the sack for your intermingle,
They’ve been know to kill servants and bury them in the dingle!
If you show your remorse, throw yourself in the Master’s lake,
Then beggeth his forgiveness for heaven’s sake,
You show you are regretful and afternoonified,
A smile and gigglemug you should adopteth,
Or he may have you flogged, or even toppethed,
Quoteth the Bible, mention forgiveness and Jepheth,
Offer to take lower wage, 3 pence a week down to a peneth!
Afore you join the other servants to be at mirth, it must be agreed,
Make sure you can handle botheth the wacky-baccy and Mead!
Before ale intake makething sure, you have pee’d,
Enjoy your yearly dayeth off, and Godspeed.
If you getteth ill, visit the local apothecary.