Memory Mangling Malcom – Page 35

Inchy Today: Friday 14th March 2025

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Today started pretty well: it soon began turning,
Depression: In three minutes & it was leaving,
Then a seizure, after which my head was reeling,
The carer called; I can’t recall all I was saying…
Was I talking? Was he listening?
I thought I’d mentioned the washing…
But I’m uncertain, that’s the thing,
Depression Duncan had really moved in,
I didn’t even do any ablutioning…
Or any physical medicationalisationing,
It took me 5 hours to do this simple Odeing!
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Even as DDDD left, my brain was busy,
I wanted to think of my ode’s lexicology,
But my thoughts spinning-changingly,
Past events, wrongs, what about the laundry?
The carer can’t get through to the pharmacy,
Happy Horis is back, albeit belatedly,
I can concentrate again, you see?
But still more to do, washing & medically,
There’s just not the time available for me,
I’ll just empty the catheter of pee…
And a heavy-duty visit to the lavatory!
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Then a seizure did manifest…
A short one, for two minutes at best,
Already feeling at my wretchedest,
If DDDD comes again, I’ll feel aghast,
I feel bad-done-to today, badassed,
I’m not a believer, but my crucifix clutched
DDDD stay away, I’m not a hypocondriast!
You made my mind vague & overcast,
Please don’t come piggybacked,
You’ll get my spirits & hopes ransacked,
If you do come, make it short & fast!
It’d be better for me it if you hadn’t trespassed,
Still, if you do, I’ll try to be steadfast…
I pray your previous visit will be your last!
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HMG spent £45m on anti-spyware,
Stored it in a warehouse, it’s still there,
Waiting for them to find the highest bidder,
It’s a toss-up twixt China & Russia,
This gives the taxpayers acroparesthesia!
Humans need to find more absorbency,
To live life happily, honestly & guiltlessly,
Accept that it’s fraudulent… I mean HMG,
Accept wars, murders, are Earthly,
How to do this? Don’t ask me!
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Life’s changed, it’s gone all skewwhiff,
With depression and war, some us live,
They called an oligarch now, not a toff
Murder, bribery, drugs and Smirnoff!,
If you need help, others just scoff,
The UK PM is a dishonest caitiff!
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Life can be confusing, adumbral,
Some disbelieving, others agnostical,
Some study things all aetiological,
These mysteries are inextirpable,
Most claims are agathokakological.
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From ‘The Statue of Liberty’
Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled
masses yearning to breathe free,
Commoners, proletariat & bourgeoisie,
Things grew more criminogenically,
Now we have borders & Trumpery,
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Life can yet become more scarier,
People can get more sneerier,
Good deeds, help, will be scantier,
Undoubtably less sincere & trustier,
Hopefully, the ladies will get sultrier!
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Waste time worrying, of things imminent,
Carers, nurses, else solitary confinement,
Seizures, dementia, falls, being impercipient,
Ending up with a self-immurement,
Seeking a mental & physical demulcent.
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No time to get anything done in the first 10 hours.
In the dawn, and it was well gone 15:00hrs before. DDDD and the Mini-Seizures finally stopped.
The worst and longest-ever depression.
It’s now nearly 16:00hrs. And I’m going to get the ablutions and medications seen to now.
I spoke with the Caregiver about whether they are doing the domestic and laundry for me. It is not known yet. The Caregiver rang the chemist again for me but could not get through this time either. He said I was now deficient on Warfarin tablets. He returned later, after contacting the chemist, with a box of Warfarin. Thanks!

Computer problems again.
The seizures were all mini, I think, anyway.
I spent hours trying to get the photos on and gave up.
I deleted all the photos taken, and in the late evening, I tried again. The computer was slow, but in the morning I could save some! Not a lot, though.

I could see things (Seeing things in clouds, Pareidoliaing).
The nature of the clouds varied in this scene.

A Cornish pastie, beetroots and French fries.
And a lemon fool dessert.
Followed by some Cheezy nibbles, and a can of shandy. I can now drink from cans again. After giving up, due to the lack of teeth, more water was going on me and the surrounding area than got down the throat. The miracle solution, you ask? The dentist didn’t want to remove all my teeth and make me dentures, so I used a straw!
Can’t see how I’d not thought of this before. Haha!

Sorry, I don’t have much on, but I did a bonus ode.

I managed to get this after-sunset photo to go on in the morning. It’s quite a different aspect in this one.

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Today’s problems were eclectic,
DDDD made things so tenebrific,
Help from a carer, that was terrific👍🏻!
Seizures & DDDD were both horrific!
One call from , vitriolic,
DDDD makes me feel ‘Depressionaholic!’
I’ve never been less enthusiastic…
My thoughts confused, ever-changing, zebraic,
Carer ‘Joe’ helped me with matters urologic👍🏻,
one visit; can you beleive it!
When DDDD returned, it was dolorific.
Oh, and neurotransmitter shocks of electric!
One seizure left me soporific, almost hypnotic,
I told Matron Jackie I hope she looks into it,
I’d like them to give me a full mental audit…
With DDDD, life gets less etheric,
It concentrates on feeling depressic!
I must stop doing odes docudramatic!

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All The Best from Inchy & Inchie, Hehe!
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Inchy Today: Monday 10th March 2025

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I’m not coping with life’s cock & bull,
Not living life much, indeed it’s not complete,
It’s less agreeable, more allegorical,
With the ingrowing toenails on my feet!
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Lonely, depressing, confusing and exilic,
Killing, wars, hating have become endemic,
Greed has now become most eclectic,
This is making me into an elegiac!
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If companionship I could acquireth…
A recovery in my spirits may beginneth,
Even at 80, can life refresh?
No, I’ll just bewaileth!
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To avoid getting any angrier, or angstier,
Full of failure and being depressederer,
Maybe I ought to see an augurerer?
Before I meet St. Peter?
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I now struggle with things arithmetical,
As I always have with things astrophysical,
My knees and hands are all arthritical,
But I try to stay amicable.
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I’ve always been something of a hypothesist,
I wanted to be a mouth organist, a harmonicist,
And was always a reader, a hermeneuticist,
And a pretty fair anecdotalist!
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Nowadays, I’m incapable of getting a crescendi,
Sad as it is, at least I do know why,
But with the end of the world being well-nigh…
I worry about the survival of the tsetse fly!
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I went to learn about antispyware…
There were a lot of people there…
An MP, a roadsweeper & a beefeater…
Good job it wasn’t a vegetarian affair!
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I went to an anti-Starmer get-together,
We all agreed he spoke bilgewater,
We knew sadly that he wasn’t a suicider…
So we bought a steamroller to run him over!
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Sir Francis died aboard ship of dysentry,
Lincoln, Garfield, McKinley & Kennedy,
Each President was assassinated, sadly…
But no one has killed Starmer yet? – alackaday!
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WARS STILL RAGE IN OUR WORLD
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Last night, I slept much shorter, but I was far less ridden with jumping awake all the time. And I did get back to sleep more quickly each time, even if tried a few times to tug out my interstitial sulcus. What was totally missing for the whole time was . A smile emanating! I considered thinking about the possibility of making the bed but chose to remove the nocturnal catheter pouch, and urine was a six on the NHS scale.

Matron Jackie and an assistant called on me.
(As did seizures, dizziness and Anne Gyna)
I struggled to follow things with two voices to listen to.
Matron Jackie will try to get me help with hospital visits and doing the ablutions.

Seizures increased after they had gone.
Confused, I did not make any notes.
Did take some photos. Not necessarily in the order put on this blog, Confusion Konrad to blame.

Misty morning.

Clock-Calendar changed.

Waste sorted.

The spuds were readied and put in the slow cooker.

Evening shot.

Nine hours later, I made the first mug of tea.
Realised I’d turned the slow cooker on to boil the spuds but left them on the old cooker.
This could happen to any other idiot, you know! Hehehe!

It was yet another busy day, but little got done.
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Keep Safe! – Kia Haumaru!
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Inchy Today: Sunday 9th March 2025

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This ode was inspired by Koheleth,
Who came into my dream on March seventh,
We chatted, and also… methinketh…
We rewrote the ten commandments, meseemeth,
He asked what mankind was really worth.
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Seems we shared many an apomorph,
In this dream, I was an ectomorph,
Seems he rebirthed in Dusseldorf,
He said life today is unsocial & tharf,
I don’t know what his words were worth.
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Long dead, he’s now a Grim Reaper, today,
‘I’ve got my own; he contacts me each day’,
He added; Mankind’s existence is not justificatory,
I said Well, there’s always been wars & poverty!
Mankind no longer read the words of the Almighty!
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I said, we no longer use mankind, but humankind,
It’s considered insulting to our female kind!
His looks of scorn tormented my mind…
Women’s duties, the Lord defined!
To reproduce, to submit to her husband.
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To the window I was beckoned…
He spoke as his arms lifted skyward…
Earthlings are no longer disciplined,
The Lord is thought less of than cannabinoid,
Faith, they go out of their way to avoid!
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The vision ended, and I felt isolated, bare…
Was this Old Testament man really there?
What was it he wanted to tell or share?
Did he visit to lambast or assure?
To the bible we should adhere?
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It was written by men to suit their persuasion!
To get a stronghold on the masses & accreditation,
Hundreds of faiths, claiming authorisation,
It’s no wonder I get depression,
Faiths & Governments are anti-egalitarian!
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Proletariats get only biased adjudicature,
Let’s face it, Starmer is an out-and-out liar!
Justice, fairness, & compassion we require,
We get greed, oligarchs, violence & war,
What can we do? Nothing, I’m sure!
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I found an old SD card hidden on the floor underneath the computer desk. I also found some photos of the progress being made at a house in front of the flats. It took another to update the series, but now it appears finished.
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Last night was the worst night’s sleep of the year
What didn’t keep waking me up? Every bloody thing seemed to! And despite being tired out, I struggeld to get back to sleep every damned time I woke up! I gave up at 05:00hrs.
Anne Gyna, I suppose, was the most oft-repeated offender, closely followed by Shaking Shoulder-Shirley.
As I moved my muscular, healthy, perfectly formed body to get at the , I started coughing and sneezing! Humph! What the heck next? Double Hump!

I removed the nocturnal catheter pouch. It was a bit darker today, and as I stood up, I lost my balance and gave way at that second… Fortunately, I managed to land on the aged, grotty-looking c1966 made, charity-shop-bought, horribly beige-coloured, £300, Harold’s Haemorrhoid-testing, non-operational, acne-giving, virus-breeding, rickety, easy-to-fall-out-of recliner that I’d just climbed out of. A bit of good luck here: did not bleed!
I emptied the night pouch, disposed of it, and paid a visit to the Porcelain Throne.
A stinky affair, and sticky as well! I got the tune of Phorpain gel to rub into Cartilage Chloe and Arthur Itis. However, I got some pm the day cather bag. I had to take it off and wash it. I’ve only got two left. I must order some more. I clearly remember thinking something similar two weeks ago. This brought on , Why? I Dunno! But he did.

I took a snap of the view from the kitchenette window. However, when I uploaded the shots to the computer later, they didn’t appear on the SD card. Treble Humph!
I gathered all the wastebin bags into one and placed it near the front door. Then, I got onto the computer and realised I had not put the SD card in Kodak Tim 2 or Kodak 1. What a mess trying to sort them out. It seemed so much harder to get to grips with while DDDD was present. I spent hours fathoming about getting them arranged in order.
Some are on each SD card and on each internal storage.

So I semi-guessed, reading each box to see if it said day or evening. Some I could not read, thanks to Glaucoma Gladys. But they were obvious ones I had to take day and night, so there was no problem. I took them. Then, as I was emptying the catheter day bag, blood was coming from Little Inchy’s fungal lesion. So I applied some cream Hydrochloride cream. Gawd, it hurt. Haha!

As it turned out, I pressed on with the blog—a mission impossible. I did not finish yesterday’s post but am starting today’s. What an imbecile!

Was joined by the longest ever Absence Seizures. I worked out the best I could, which must have lasted three hours. I was finally coming out, or back into, mock reality. The carer arrived. I know I was talking to him, but I do not know what. I’m going to have to ring the Doctor about these. Mind you, I already have. I waited 8 days to get a telephone call back from her. I have waited another 6 days for a call. This gigantic, lengthy, non-eleptic seizure left me confused & drained. Not good!

I must get Saturday’s blog done now (22:36hrs).

Done it! Hurrah! .23:00hrs

Earlier sunset snaps.
Almost like a painting?

Food needed now!
Wunderbar!
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Concerned at too many a seizure…
Differing types, lengths, anywhither.
Waiting for Matron, as assessor & advisor,
Three weeks now, she may come in October,
Worried about my mental architecture,
My innards, eyesight and Back-Pain-Brenda,
Currently, the worst different types of seizure,
My latest ailment is arithmaphobia,
Doing the medications ordering and roster,
I feel a sort of mental nincompooper,
Signs of my becoming a cacographer,
Eyesight & shakes, a terrible photographer,
My mind & body are contracting dystaxia,
Options, decisions taken, ever more dotier,
Prolonged seizures? I become a gongoozler,
Ankle ulcers colours, black, red and/or zaffre,
Little Inchies Fungal lesion, Anne Gyna,
Shirley’s Shaking Shuddering Shoulder,
Toothache Tiffany, Gladys Glaucoma,
Earache Erasmus, Acne and Eczema,
Cartilage Choe & Carol, Episodic Ataxia,
Dementia Doreen, Paroxysmal Dyskinesia,
Dark Dank Depression Duncan, a canker!
For reading this Ode-Moan; I thank yer!

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Forgive My Foul Language, but Starmer!
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Inchy Today: Monday 3rd March 2025

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I find life to be undefined,
Plans and hopes are undetermined,
Often, my thoughts are unwarranted,
My intentions remain unendorsed,
No outcomes are usually unassured!
Daily seizures are unprecedented…
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My brain? It cannot really be classified…
My bones & joints are crepitated,
In High Mood Horis, I’m almost contented,
Deep Depression Duncan often caprioled,
No one here, no chance of getting croodled,
Life is getting more circumscribed…
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There’s a hollowness when I get depressed,
I get sorry for myself, feel disadvantaged,
It may prompt wild things to be deliberated,
My thoughts get convoluted, disassembled,
A nasty DDD session can only be described…
As coffee that’s been decaffeinated.
I hate it, sickening until it’s departed!
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DDDD can’t be rectified or remedied,
It’s beyond being cured or rectified,
After it was analysed, I was repulsed,
Dementia inside cannot be resarciated,
I admit I felt forlorn, resigned…
The seizures & DDDD never retreated,
Another visit soon, to be reinvestigated,
I wonder if my brain can be reinstalled.
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In High Mood Horis, I can feel stimulated,
Although that sounds a little sugar-coated,
To wild dreams & fantasies I succumbed,
DDDD returns, I get mentally spifflicated,
The longer the session, the more scunnered,
Mentally drained, and feel shanghaied,
Writing this ode, I’ve been shemozzled…
The DDDD has suddenly sequestered,
Blessedly to uncaringness I succumbed!
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If Happy Horis stayed all day accommodated!
And DDDD could be disconnected, abdicated,
Then hopes & plans could be activated,
Then I could be far less aggravated!
And no doubt feel much less alienated,
But of course, DDDD can’t be amputated,
The damned DDD can’t even be ameliorated,
But I can get so frustrated and acerbated…
Realising that my needs can’t be assuaged,
Dreaming the Seizures may be assuaged
And Anne Gyna’s pains be abrogated!
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Daily, I’m self-loathed and vilipended,
Verbally, I’m self-verberated,
Also, I get self-vulnerated,
Once, when I left the hot tap running, I vomited,
And again, was self-vociferated,
I believed I should be vapulated,
Had my sanity been vitiated?
I kid myself I am capably viveured,
I’ve still often get self-verbally-violated,
The line below: Can I be acquitted and vindicated?
I’d gladly see Starmer vivisepultured!
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DDDDD WAS ON FOR MOST OF THE DAY.
Little got acheived.
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I found a few missing photos from yesterday’s internal memory of the Kodak Tim 2. Here they are.

Late evening shots from the kitchenette.
To the left
Centre
And the right
An earlier shot, with the moon crescent
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There’s not a lot on here. I’ve got to admit that really got to me today. I’m so sorry, but I was pathetically mopping about in between the lousy seizures and just couldn’t muster any enthusiasm until late afternoon when visited me. He didn’t stay long, and it was soon back to sitting, staring at what might as well have been a blank screen. But with an overfull catheter bag, too! The Carer told me when they arrived. An hour later, and returned and is still with me as I type away now on this computer. I spent hours on today’s ode. The reason? I’ll tell yers, Haha! Who usually comes on bad around 16:00hrs or so, blurred things at 14:00hrs.
Then, amazingly, at 15:00 or so, the vision came back quite suddenly. So I’m getting on with it, but naturally, I expect the return on or at any time now. Omlt just typed this, and electric shocks shot up my right leg, followed by his ‘ailment-in-arms’ partner .
No shaving cuts today, yet. I didn’t have one! Dirty boy!
As I was about to go in the wet room. Miserably, I gave up the fight and, feeling sorry for myself, sat down and fell asleep! I was woken up by who was in cahouts with DDD and Seizure Sandra. The daft things, I guess!
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Only photos to trigger the memory from here on.

I’m not sure this is today’s shot of the waste bags. I may have got it mixed up and deleted the wrong one.

I was merrily grafting away here. And I got that fearful, sudden-sinking feeling; I thought I had left the hot tap running again. I moved limpingly to the kitchen, and the catheter contraption fell down to almost my ankle! Arrgh!
The tug on Little Inchy was as near to excruciating as I wanted it to be. At least the tap was not running – but I’d left the fridge door open!
Now, the problems multiplied.
I had a mini-seizure as I was checking the catheter and tried to pull it up quickly to relieve the pain. Lost my balance and reached out to grab the corner of the counter, and unfortunately, I missed it due to the intense sunshine blasting through the window! I now have even more scars on the tight leg ulcer, and it bled a tiny bit as I caught it on the trolley.
On the bright side, there usually is one if I look hard enough -at least I stayed, as wobbly as they were, on my feet.
Now I had water running out of the fridge, blood trickling down my leg, a mess to sort out, and the telephone started ringing!
I abandoned the mess I created and got to the landline in time. Sister Jane talked about tonight’s Forest vs. Ipswich F.A. Cup game. She and Pete are going to it. (I watched it later; it’s still on the box, in extra time).

Then I went back to the kitchenette, and it wasn’t until then that I realised I’d just soaked myself in the cold water I’d poured into the bowl and dropped it! Wet dressing gown, legs, and feet. Which, of course, made the messed-up area even larger to clean up now! DDDD went deep this time. I can’t recall everything I had to sort out. It must have taken me well over an hour and a half. Washing and drying inside the fridge and throwing away some soaked foods. I changed my shirt and protection pants. Putting my wet slippers, shirt & dressing gown into the laundry bag. Then, I got fresh slippers, a shirt and a dressing gown. I still had some cleaning up I’d missed, and the landline rang again.
All I could hear was background noise. For anyone who knows me, to ring this late worried me. I thought it might be my sweetheart, Frank’s Jenny, or sister Jane. Jenny might have been in a pickle with something, like Jane. I’d got Jane’s number on auto dial on the landline, so I rang her first; as I did, I realised she would be at the football match. No surprise she didn’t answer. Then I rang Jenny. I know it was late, but she might have needed support or help, so I rang. She told me she was okay, and that was wonderful to hear. She spoke of the window cleaner situation at the flats and asked about the medical problem, and I told her I was waiting for Matron Jackie to visit me to explain about the seizures. Bless her for her caring nature ♥. Then Jane rang back. I was in total disarray. So many things were happening simultaneously, and I had little, if any, control over any of them.

Anne Gyna and both turned their attentions on me at the same time.
I had to give up sorting anything out. Concentration and confusion took over. I’ll try to finish this before I give up and get my head down. I’m so tired and weary now. Even joined in the mayhem.
I’m not interested in eating at all. In the morning, I must ask the caregiver to redo/repair/replace the catheter for me.

I’ll get the out-of-sync photos on.

Aha, letters delivered.
Carer allowance cut?
It’s still unopened.
The same dosages.
I remembered and made time to update the c1970s clock-calender at 17:10hrs it seemed. Hehe!
Results of the Accifauxpas over the last two days!

I’ve eaten nothing all day and am so tired. I think I’ll have some biscuits and get my head down.
Another busy day is coming up tomorrow.
Just what I need after today’s farcicalness!
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A Thought: Please make tomorrow less stressful. PLEASE!
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I’ve got back with me again, now. Grumph!

TTFN.

Inchys Ode: Saturday 1st March 2025

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Duncan paid fewer visits today,
But perhaps I shouldn’t say…
It’s not as if he went away,
What will happen on Saturday?
Good luck to me isn’t anticipatory,
If it comes, it’s always only briefly,
Though it always returns, worryingly,
But I write this ode ultracrepidarianly,
I got that from my thesaurus dictionary,
My life bears moments of uncertainty…
Conjecture, questioning my own ubiety,
No claims to rightness or piety,
Awaiting a glaucoma op and urinoscopy,
I often act subconsciously, mistakenly,
Or over-humbly, sycophantishly,
At times, I’m away with the sidhe,
If Dark, Dank Depression Duncan, Dawns,
With my own brain, I can lock horns,
Duncan’s visit can feel like an aeon,
Attracts feelings of rejection and abjection,
Are these ‘downs’ real or an aberration?
He can bring on a cruel self-beration,
Sometimes, a sort of zombification,
A low, deeper than being woebegone,
While accepting my own antiquation…
With its struggle amany and vulneration,
Dementia Doreen is another vaurien,
Incogniscent Iris, seisures often…
DDDD the opposite of High Mood Horis, you see,
Alternates with DDDD visit frequently,
One extreme or the other, persistently,
Never equidistantly or contentedly,
I can struggle to find reality, facticity,
Thoughts, movements show contumacy…
My neurotransmitters are dying on me,
Are texts from limb to brain understood clearly?
A chance of it being right? They go astray!
High-Mood-Horis; I do what I can do quickly,
DDDDD? Then things can get tricky…
Throw in the odd interrupting seizure…
What I’m writing can turn to bilgewater,
I often turn into self-loathing babbler,
When Horis returns, I think he’s boshter,
Then, no matter if the problem gets bigger,
Or has the temerity to get smaller,
Or new farces & snags I discover,
While I’m under Horis’s protective cover!
Ménière’s, seizures… but I always recover,
In High-Horis-Mood, I seem not to bother..
Well, I don’t… I couldn’t be cheerfuller,
DDDD returns, I change into a self-depraver…
A curmudgeon, self-loather, a self-hater,
Yesterday, Horis was the chief-frequenter,
Today, DDDD is issuing his depressing diaspora,
Giving me paranolia, perfervour,
He’s in and out more than I use the door!
Today, more often than ever before,
Could this account for today’s pyrexia?
In speech, thoughts & actions, I palter,
Prevaricate, equivocate, peradventure,
Had my fortune told by a chiromancer,
When I was an anklesnapper…
She told Dad, Your son will, in the future,
See the world’s end and last disaster!
She didn’t say I’ll be wearing a catheter,
Or I’d have a heart attack, then get cancer,
Get shot twice, Cataracts or Glaucoma,
FND, or be fitted with mechanical aorta,
An ankle, throat and Duodenal ulcer,
Or I’d get thrown into a canal, then a mere,
Ingrowing toenails, or get ever-deafer,
Or I’d say thingummy, whatchamacallit, dojigger,
Impaired memory, due to Doreen’s Dementia,
Or I’d fail to get a job as a railway porter,
Through being colour blind, called protanopia,
Or I’d end up an octenarian with dysphoria,
Or fungal lesions, & sweet memories of Grizelda,
Or I’d be killed by a man called Herr Starmer!
As would many a pensioner and farmer,
Or have to grow up with child-sized todger,
Or succeed with a landladies daughter,
The nurse arrived to change my catheter,
Getting the tube back in meant a lot of swordplay,
I wouldn’t go back in straightaway,
We had a bit of a shilly-shally…
We got it in, although it was bloody,
Then she checked the state of my rear alley,
She gave the piles some close-up scrutiny,
She treated me kindly, ointmentatily,
Barrier creamed things gently,
She groped the swollen testical for me,
I was embarrassed; I didn’t act squeamishly,
No real pain, things felt a little sorely,
Thanked her, wished her well, merrily,
When I moved, things kicked off painfully…
After my Whoopsiedangleplopski!
I took a tumble down on my right knee,
The cather tube yanking at Little Inchie,
Care arrived; perfect timing to lift me,
Onto my computer chair, swiftly,
No serious harm was caused, thankfully,
The only real pain was testically,
Little Inchie felt a smidge itchy,
In the shower, a biol in my armpit!
I go in a tangle doing arithmetic,
My wind escapages were miasmic,
DDDDDawned, why did I feel complicit?
Guilt, shame, I felt I was a nudnick,
I wanted to run away, be nomadic,
Another seizure, after which I felt sick,
Inside, was I adopting things pseudologic?
I finished this ode; is it oxymoronic?
I sat for hours doing nothing!
At the computer, apparently just staring?
Yet I couldn’t stop thinking,
Mostly rubbish, pointless rambling,
Not in a seizure? My thoughts alternating,
Forgotten in seconds, more were coming…
No logic, common sense or warning?
Dark, dank depression Duncan was dawing!
I went with the flow; it wasn’t even annoying,
I don’t see why, but this was humiliating,
As silly things I started contemplating…
I, was the only thing I was hating,
My interest in everything started abating,
I’m so tired, having done and achieved nothing!
I’m ashamed; should I be publishing?
I so miss circulating, & friendly badinaging,
Mutual silliness, verbal consorting,
Oh, it’s already time for my Warfarin,
I might have a shandy with the medication.
Almost immediately, there’s less aggravation,
returned; my new addiction,
I can’t give a toss now about any affliction,
Gone are my worries and agitation,
I am proud now to be an anythingarian,
I could fight Starmer and Satan,
Who I think are working in collaboration.
I laugh at ailments and debilitation,
You’ll maybe read this as deliberation?
But when DDDD leaves, I lose my tension.
If only my Doctor would pay attention!
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
HOWZAT!
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
A bad day.
Put most of it in the day-long ode. Sorry.

Didn’t get up until past 06:00hrs.
The pouch was taken off and emptied.
Waste bags sorted and ready.
Made up some pots to use for the laundry.

Carer Chris arrived. No diabetic socks were needed to be put on, as I was planning to do the ablutions & medicationings later on.
As soon as Chris departed, I got in the wet room.
Shaving first—two cuts. The teeth went okay. No showering done, I was up too late. I dried off and had a heck of a job getting the fresh protection pants on. They are the thicker ones, as I’ve run out of the dearer ones, and with Starmer nicking my winter fuel money, I must cut back.

Carer Christopher took this on his second call, returning the laundry for me. It’s an excellent shot. I took three, but they all came out with massive shiny spots on them. Thanks.

Finally I got on the computer.
Determined to do a themed ode (above).
It turned out a bit dreary and covered so many things that I lost the plot altogether. It took me hours to complete, so nothing else was done, including sorting out the catheter equipment. Humph!

I took a break late in the afternoon. A cuppa, and went to investigate what nosh I had to make a meal with later on. Not a lot. So I think I’ll have a frozen ready meal with some bread. Then again, we’ll see what happens.

The nurse mentioned above arrived. A lovely lady.
Embarrassing it might have been, but she was so good at keeping me calm. XXX

I took this snap as she departed.

Back to the ode and eventually, I got it finished.

By then, it was really dark outside, but beautiful. I’m so glad I saw the sky when I did. I only went into the kitchen to make sure I’d not left the tap running or the fridge or freezer door open. What a colourful sky!
To the right.
To the left.
Zoom in ahead.
Well pleased with these efforts.

Carer Chris returned. Medications given.

I decided not to make a meal yet. If I leave until after his last call, I may be able to stay awake long enough to watch the FA Cup match highlights.
But then again… Hehehe!

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
TTFNski!
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Inchy Today: Friday 28th March 2025

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– Good Run Continuing! –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – POLITICAL, AGAIN – –
The future of the world? A bloodstain,
East, West, ne’er the twain…
We can’t agree to help Ukraine,
Redtop is back as President again…
:::::
Oligarchs, a financial sovereign,
People starving in Suriname,
Chinese think war is a game…
Prices and tax rises, gigantean.
:::::
Starmer, EU, arcane, inhumane,
Backhanders, threats to ducdame,
Wars, death, it always the same,
Do they resist, desist, complain or deign?
:::::
Our planet should be a hallowed fane,
We think more of money, financial gain…
Help each other? Or eat our frangipane?
What I write, I believe, is germane,
:::::
People are so much more legerdemain,
Proletariats can do nothing, we’re lurdane,
To Politicians: life’s a profitable game,
Russia, USA, China, all are Suzerain!
:::::
Which leader is a Bonapartean?
Which leader is a Hitlerarean?
Which leader is a Robespierrean?
Which leader is a Shakespearean?
:::::
Do they know that life is not a video game?
Blaming each other as the villain,
What they say, they do not mean…
Each leader just wants to be the top apogean!
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
FURTHERMORE & NOT WITHSTANDING…
A little serious, the above may seem,
Peace is something that rulers cannot attain,
Leaders do not accept the blame…
Neither do they feel or show any shame,
They’re extraordinarily, transmundane,
Am I living in the spiritual realm?
Who’s controlling Earth’s helm?
Is the planet getting overwarm?
Will we live to earth unwarm?
Are Earth’s leaders part of a secret deern?
Nuclear, coal, hydrogen, nor windfarm,
Will stop doing Earth harm,
Will the promised saviour ever return,
Keir spouts primarily lies & aeriform,
I don’t think politicians are homoiotherm,
Their actions affect my neuroectoderm,
Labours mob, are worst, skelm!
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– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
I discovered some snaps that I forgot to include in yesterday’s blog. Here they are. Better late than never. I managed to finish the longish Friday ode done before it got too busy. Seizures were again few & far between.

Afternoon views of the puffer clouds.
I’m glad I caught the contrails.

Evening shots.
Sunset.
The high up moon.

Evening meal, well, the only meal. Mixed a tin of chilli with a ready-made chilli meal. Bread & Lemon cake. Slurp!

Not a lot of detail in depth today. It’s been a busy day, and I’m being told off. Hehe!

A smidge deeper shade today.

VISIT
Not half!

Clock-Calender reset.

Daybreak shot.

Midday.

17:30hrs.

Notepad notes: Many are unreadable even with the spyglasses and reading glasses on. I’m assuming it’s always the same when it comes to teatime. It’s been like this for over a week now. I’ve partly guessed at some and left others out—not that many were on the pad. When things calmed down, I had a go at the word list replacement again. I wish I could rid myself of this addiction..
But it seems I’m obsessive. And I can’t!

Found the photos in the camera’s memory.

Multiple corrections were needed to balance things layout-wise before posting it on the blog. I got so angry with myself. This alone cost me well over an hour after I’d spent over two hours updating.

An undecipherable bit here…

Carers Marie and Selina made the first two calls. Marie changed the day catheter for me. There’s another unreadable bit here on the pad.

Phone Call from Social Services. She was not pleased with me. Sadly.

Chris did the teatime Carer call.

I realised that I’d not sorted out the catheter contraptions.
Mind you, I knocked over the drawers in the kitchen, and it took me at least three hours to sort out and reorganize them.

The main problem was that I did not stop working on the stupid word list. I’m not sure while I am doing it. I don’t think I’ll live long enough to finish it. Haha!

Went on comments and WP Reader.

Then realised how hungry I was. I almost returned to recompiling the word list, but I stopped myself.

Must get something to eat now.
I’ll catch up in the morning. (He says!)

I was getting the meal and about to photograph it when the landline chirped up. It was someone asking to speak to Helen. ‘No Helen’s here…’ – ‘Come on duffhead, don’t fart about!’ – ‘I think you’ve got the wrong number!’ – ‘Oh, shit, sorry midduck!’ So at least I knew it was someone from Nottingham when he used ‘midduck. ‘ Hehehe!

I forgot to take a photo of the meal: mashed potatoes, mackerel in BBQ sauce, beetroot, crispy onions, and garden peas. It was not as good as it sounded.

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
TTFNski!
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Inchy: Thursday 27th February 2025

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
If I can if I can pass to pensioners some pain,
Kill a farmer financially as I pass along,
Kill some pensioners, although it’s wrong,
Then my living shall not be in vain,
Then my living shall not be in vain,
Then my living shall not be in vain,
Take backhanders & get given a gong,
Then my living shall not be in vain.
If I do my duty as an Oligarch ought,
Make sure the war in Ukraine is still fought,
If I can spread messages that Hitler taught,
Then my living shall not be in vain
Then my living shall not be in vain
Then my living shall not be in vain
If I can help somebody as I pass along
And become a billionaire before too long…
Then my living shall not be in vain!
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –

0310hrs: I had an awakening like never before. I was instantly discombobulated. I knew I had to get up early for something… or did I? After a few minutes of trying to ascertain this seemingly critical mission was. I drifted back to sleep. That in itself was a rarity for me.

I woke up later, and the same thing happened. I was disorientated and perhaps getting a smidgeon psychotic over not recalling the urgent whatever it was!
I nodded off a second time. I had a dream this time: I was in a canal at night, keeping afloat using a wooden door. The next awakening was back to the usual style… with some shooting up my right leg, while gave me few jerks to the right. As if orchestrated, the moment stopped and launched a short but violent attack to get my shoulder joint out of its socket.
Amazingly, I went back to the land of nod again!
I think it was 0400hrs when I stirred once more. It took great effort, but I forced myself to dismount the hospital bed, detach it, and empty it .
The urine was the reddest it had been in the last week, scoring a 6 on the NHS scale.

I’d forgotten why I should have gotten up earlier, so I set about collating the contents of all four waste bins into one green one. I took it to the front door and added it to yesterday’s pile, which I had obviously also forgotten about taking to the waste chute. I was not with it, yet!

I went to the wet room to get the medicationalisationgs and ablutionings done.
There are usually calls for the to be used, but not this morning. There were no signs or signals from the innards. So, I got the teggies done. Then started to shave. Four cuts, all tiny ones, twice I dropped a razor, I knocked over the and dropped the can of shaving foam. Removed the plates of meat (feet) from the bowl of water, and had a good body scrub, and a gentler cleaning of the more delicate parts.
I dried off and tackled the areas in need of medicationalising. As is typical, they only caused pain, and I was puzzled that there was no need for them to be utilised. I did the other four areas and got the olive oil in the ears for the last task. No shower was taken this morning, but I did make an effort on the Porcelain Throne—a great effort. I had a go on the crossword book, but I had no success with that or encouraging the concrete torpedo to exit. It’ll come when it’s ready.

I veered of track, not that I knew what the track was anyway, and before getting dressed, I went to look at the prescriptions, which would last me until the next delivery. I was none the wiser after fifteen minutes of Arithmaphobia-driven struggling. It is very embarrassing to have this problem.

Finally, I got to the computer and adjusted the clock calendar on the desk. I then started on finishing yesterday’s blog and posted it off to WP.

The caregiver, Same, came at about 0830 hrs. She sorted the medications and put on my diabetic socks. She said that the warfarin tablets should last me until the next delivery.

I went on email and one from the Catheter deliverer. It is coming today. Unfortunately, I may have to leave the blog tomorrow to see if I can do a cartoon and ode. Because I’ve a mammoth job on Friday. I must find and sort the different catheter supplies and store them separately but in the same room. This is going to be a most-of-the-day job for me. I need lots of breaks, the Seizures, back pain, Brenda, Anne Gyna, and Gladis Glaucoma to be kind to me.
Ah, that’s why I wanted to get up early, in case they were delivered early and I could make a start on them... But they weren’t, so that’s that!

The Catheter contraptions box was delivered.
A big job for me to sort out tomorrow.

Getting dark already.
Took these shots from the kitchen window.

Getting on now. I’ll make a ready meal, methinks.

I added a can of cheap chilli to a ready-made chilli con carne meal. Bread and a lemon cake to boot!

– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
May I wish everyone a Great Day!
Not Pensioner-Killer Herr Starmer. Oh, na!
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –

SUGAR! I’ve missed some photos! I’ll put them on tomorrow’s blog. Danged Cognitive Impairment Iris!