Inchcock goes to get his medications and other bits from the old flea-pit – then into town to get bread milk and t-shirts – Returns to flat to find five letters from Nottingham City Homes, and one from he don’t know where!
The first one from the Nottingham City Homes:
From KGS Rents & Leasehold Manager: Just detailing why we have to pay in advance and giving a list of dates over the next nine months and how much. Gave me a Service User number and Reference number.
The second one from the Nottingham City Homes:
From their Customer Service Centre: informing me they would be sending a repair team to look at the Air Vent that is coming away from the wall in the kitchen – on 17th July twixt 0930hrs and 1430hrs. And to make sure an appropriate adult is at the property when we carry out the work. Move furniture and other items out of the area before their arrival. Fair enuf, I suppose.
The third one from the Nottingham City Homes:
From Alix Dale Communications Officer Capital Projects & Secure Warm Modern??? Nottingham City Homes have appointed Swift Fire & Security (Swift) to carry out an annual inspection and test at of all smoke detectors in Woodthorpe Courts sometime between 0830hrs and 1700hrs. As it is vital you allow the Swift engineer access into your flat. If these times are not convenient please call Swift office on (Number given) choose option 1 and then press 1 for service.
The forth one from the Nottingham City Homes:
From their Customer Service Centre: Repairs to UPVC window -Window stiff, itchen drawer. 9th July twixt 0930hrs and 1430hrs. make sure an appropriate adult is at the property when we carry out the work. Move furniture and other items however if the work is more extensive that we thought we may need to come back. You will be informed by a member of our staff on the day. We will attempt to carry out the repair on this visit. Fair enuf, I suppose again.
As if I haven’t got enough appointments with the decorators coming, the painter coming, the carpetman, cooker, fridge-freezer and me medical appointments – oh dear!
The fifth one from Gawd know where:
From a very poorly educated Olalacam Akeen who informs me: I can get a 200% return on the smalle amount of capital if transferred from your account. Details providedd will be not kept secret between Ilcoy Inc and yor self. Binned it!
Well, he speaks more and better English than I do of whatever his language is. Hehe!