T’Other day Inchcock suffered from Chronic writers block…
So off he went, to town to buy himself a new alarm clock,
Socks, medications, ear-muffs and a new frock,
Antiseptic cream, hearing-aid batteries and butterscotch,
Painkillers and wound coverings for his bleeding crotch,
Hearing aid-batteries, pipe baccy and a bottle of scotch,
Pawnbrokers, put his shoplifted Cartier watch into hoch,
Money in his pocket, proud as a Peacock,
Went to get the bread and the bone of a ham hock,
At the Nottingham beach festival he thought this I’ll de-frock,
He grabbed her round middle and thought poppycock!
As he cuddle up to her he got an electric shock!
Now he resides in a police cell-block,
Feeling right fool and great pillock!