Category: The Nottingham Lads True Tales of Woe

Thu 25.06.2015: Inchcock Today

Thursday 25th June 2015

HeadThurs

What a busy, messy day!

Good sleep in last night, must have needed it.

Arose made a cuppa and spent an hour or two doing some sorting. BJ coming today around 1100hrs.

The wound was less painful this morning, but the angina is nasty and later when moving some bags I’d filled the wound started stinging again Huh!

Not in good spirits at the moment.

Not sure why?

Started this diary off and created the header.

Did loads of shredding.

BJ arrived and loaded the shredded paper into his car, took a couple of bags of unwanted fodder and lifted me to the recycling bins on Mansfield Road.

I walked back to get some movement into me painfully stiff limbs.

Got in the flea-pit to find me INR results log had arrived.

They had informed me my next test is on Monday 29th June – a bit disappointing that, because that is me day to meet Steve at the new flat to do the signing and whatever else with the Council representatives.

Crap!

So I WC’d and walked to the Doctors surgery to see if they could do me an appointment early on Monday.

Called in the Co-op on the way and got a loaf and some bananas.

The only one they could offer was a 0935hrs – which meant I would not be able to get to the flats on time for the meeting!

Crap!

The receptionist said get a taxi – but I doubt if it would arrive on time (Having worked for a private hire company in the past like!), or get there in time if it did arrive on time?

Crap!

I rang BJ to see if he could pick me up from the surgery as he was going to come with me to the meeting. He could not give an answer as he was busy at the time, said he’d ring me back.

So I till didn’t know what to do about the INR appointment. The receptionist said it had to be on the 29th.

Crap!

Of course Steve from Age UK is away on holiday so couldn’t consult him either.

Crap!

Ended up booking the 0935hrs slot, as the only other one on the day was for 1545hrs, and I don’t know if anything will be required of me at or after the meeting yer see?

Crap!

So, up to now that’s Friday (tomorrow) Skin Cancer wound check-up at 1500hrs (Hopefully I can get some sorting/shredding done at last, pains permitting).

INR Monday 0935hrs – meeting re-flat at Woodthorpe Court 1000hrs.

Wednesday Clinic checks and decision hopefully to be made about me bleeding lesion on me Inch.

Thursday 2nd July CHD health check 0910hrs.

Plus of course any other Whoopsiedangleplops inspired new accidents, mishaps or cock-ups in between. And any extra INR tests needed if the level goes too low again.

Crap!

Sorry to sound so niggled annoyed and frustrated – but I am!

I’m doing me best to get things sorted and new pains, appointments and other frustrations are getting in the way of any progress all the time.

Crap!

So tired again now, and lost heart. (Poor demented clot!)

Going to have bacon sarnies and a banana fer me nosh.

Not one of me better days, started wiv me feeling under-the-weather and not knowing why, ended up wiv me confused, frustrated and a tad depressed.

Hey-ho, we’ll see what tomorrow brings though!

Took me medications.

Taketh care all.

TTFN.

It’s Been a Funny Old Life Part 3 – Prosed ponderously by Inchcock

As an ankle-snapper I had a skinny physique,

In fact they knicknamed me ‘The Pipsqeak’,

When Mam was at home, times were bleak,

She and Dad shouted and fought, they didn’t speak,

She rarley stayed home for more than a week,

To the outside loo, if one wanted a leak,

Getting the tin bath off the yard wall every week,

Demanded a certain safety-first technique.

–

Drag it into the front room in front of the fire,

Clean it up with bleach and a pad of wire,

Heating up water in kettles & pans was dire,

The use of the fire and stove I’d aquire,

To keep the bath topped up as Dad did require.

After several top-ups Dad would retire,

Then t’was my turn in the cold water in front of the fire!

–

Dry missen off with the wet towel Dad had used,

Bath back on’t wall ready fer it to be reused,

Out to the coal-house while Dad snoozed,

Chopped wood brought in coal, getting bruised,

Laid the fire for the morning – felt abused!

–

Life was how it was, so why feel sad or blue?

No hot running water, fridge or TV it’s true,

Tableclothes? The Evening newspaper would do,

Lighting the gas-lamps was risky too,

When Pennies in the meters were due…

Mam had some arcade coins, one or two!

No toilet paper for our out-side loo,

Cut-up newspaper for wiping: the memories ooh!…

Wed 24 June 2015: Inchcock Today: Busy again… but not got much done?

Wednesday 24th June 2015

Sprang awake at 0300hrs – mind racing.

So I got the old laptop on and did some WordPressing. I took my medications.

Eventually forced missen to stop and have a wash and change.

Made a cuppa and fed the pigeons as I took out the rubbish and did some graphicationalisationing and Facebooking.

Then got the nibble-bags ready for later. So as I could give them to the nurses at the clinic (1300hrs appointment) and staff at the GP surgery (1100hrs appointment).

Bit nippy this morning.

Spent a good while trying to get to copy rich text from Word  but no luck. I can from Apache, but for some reason the spell-checker has gone wonky on that and is not working. Tsk!

WC’d and spruced missen up, then set off on me walk to the GP Surgery.

It had brightened up a lot as I started on me hobble.

Got to the surgery and was soon in the Practice Nurses treatment room having me stitches removed.

I must say, the wound is hurting more now that it was before, but by disturbing it, I should expect that.

The Nurse did say she was not too happy with it – and booked me in to go back on Friday for another check of it.

Handed the receptionist the fodder bag and departed.

Not much  traffic about this morning.

Poddled back to the flea-pit and added the appointment for Friday to me diary straight away like.

Then off again with me bus-pass to the Clinic appointment.

Would you believe the doctor there said “I’m not happy with this lesion not healing”. Everyone seems to be telling me they’re not happy with some part of me anatomy today! Hehehe!

I was going to take a picture of a three vehicle ‘Whoopsiedangleplop’ near the island on the way back – but I’d left me camera at home in the other bag. Huh!

Gor back WC to the lesion (painfully) stood up and caught me flaming skin cancer wound on the edge of the door! Whoopsidangleplop again!

Turned off the latop and set aout doing some sorting – but it’s painful with the angina, arthritis, bleeding little Inch and me newly banged wound. Huh and Tsk!

Made me nosh early – Sausage sandwiches I think, too tired to bother with owt else.

But found some microwave chips so decided to have sausage and chip sandwiches instead.

Not so good the chips – the sausages were okay though.

Rated: 6/10 overall.

Feeling well drained again… Tsk!

Tue 23 June 2015: Inchcock Today: Launderette Day

Tuesday 23rd June 2015

Up at 0630hrs. Decent sleep despite the dreams. Not that I can recall much about them.

Cuppa medications and worked on graphics.

Coughing and a-wheezing again – oh dear!

Got the laundry ready to take, two full bags.

Thne did me posts for the LOMM site that I’d forgotten to do on Monday – Tsk!.

Set off to the shops.

The pigeons came down to demand their breakfast as I left the flea-pit.

I was glad to see BJ’s car outside the launderette when I arrived.

At least I knew he was not poorly or worse.

Had a good chin-wag with him and Mandie.

BJ was soon off – told him I had some food and other things he might like to have or make use of from me sorting things ready for the move.

He said he’d ring me Thursday.

More Nottingham PAvement Cyclists as I made me way back to the dump.

I forgot all about any sorting and spent the day making posts for me ‘Nottingham Then and Now’ series for the WordPress Inchock site.

Eventually guilt made me do some sorting – but the shoulder wound got bad, and tiredness dawned and decided I would retire early.

Made me nosh.

Bacon, sausages in chopped tomatoes with added herbs – and bread thins.

Ate the lot of it as well.

Rated 7.9/10.

Wearily nodded off.

Mon 22.6.2015: Inchcock Today: Feeling anxious for some reason?

Monday 22nd June 2015

Sprang awake at 0300hrs and lay there fretting and pondering on how I was going to get any sorting done today – GP INR Warfarin level tests at the GP surgery at noon today.

Gloomy this morning.

Got some sorting done and rubbish to the bin, and put me ironing board outside with someone elses give-aways near their garage.

Made a cuppa, then thought I’d photograph the give-away stuff with me ironing board amongst them a few minutes later – and me ironing board had gone already!

At this time in the morning (0414hrs).

Did the header for this diary and Facebooked a while – soon feeling guilty and started to do some much-needed shredding.

While sorting out in the kitchen I came across a net of Marmite cheese that had fallen behind some rubbish – I’d tell you the sell-by date but as Victor Mildrew nearly used to say in his ‘One Foot in the Grave’ shows: “You wouldn’t believe it!”

Pressed on with sorting and shredding again.

Had a wash shave and changed and set off for the GP surgery.

Had me blood test and chin-wag with the Obergruppenführer… I mean Surgery Nurse.

When I left the rain was a-falling.

I’d hoped to get a walk into town in, but caught the bus instead. Thank heavens for me free pensioners bus-pass!

When I arrived in town the Nottingham Citizenry were proving their ability to cross the lights against the red lighted pedestrian signal, yet again. This them it had been on red for a good while, and a bus came around the corner and tapped his horn and one of the illegal crosses of the road actually put his two fingers up to the bus driver!

Visit Nottingham, the Queen of the Midlands the advert says. Hehe!

I had a good long walk around Nottingham taking photographs of certain areas so I could make a post “Nottingham Then and Now” with photographs from the past and today of the same things later.

Good job I didn’t walk to town, because by the time I’d finished trekking all over the City me feet and knees were killing me.

I called in the Nottingham Transport shop to ask what number bus does the route between Nottingham and Woodthorpe Park where the new flat is situated, and where it goes from in town.

After the lady consulted a map and the other Maidenoberführerin… I mean assistants, she suggested I go to Broad Marsh (Which I trudged through earlier on me photo-hunt) and ask there.

Peeved a little, I called in the Nottingham information Centre under the Council House and asked them – within 5 minutes they had given me the location, the number and a map.

I staggered (Well the knees were really bad, I knew summat was in the wind weather-wise) up to the bus stop and caught the bus back to the hovel.

When I got off the bus the flipping wind was howling and folk were struggling to walk against it, and it went really dark as the rain started to trickle down a bit with it.

Called in the Co-op and got some of their bread-thins to have with me later re-planned nosh tonight.

I was going to have the last of me BBQ Chicken with some mashed spuds – but when I got back to the flea-pit, put the kettle on, got the chicken out of the fridge – it was passed it’s sell-by date – I know that feeling Haha!

So it’ll be Sliced potatoes in onion sauce and sausages from the freezer later – I added some black-bean cooking sauce?

Don’t know where the desserts came from…

I wasn’t up to doing any more sorting so updated this diary… and ate two mini-swiss rolls.

Ate me nosh then did some Facebooking.

Despite me feeling tires I had a heck of job getting to sleep – Tsk!

Sun 21.06.15: Inchcock Today: Grafting away…

Sunday 21st June 2015

Woke at 0310hrs.

The shoulder wound was really stinging this morning. Might have overdone the sorting yesterday, took an extra painkiller with me morning cuppa and medications.

Couldn’t find the camera so I could finish yesterdays diary with the photo I took of me nosh.

Searched all over – fearing I’d somehow threw it out with the unwanted rubbish. Looked in the bins stretched to get down and started the cancer wound off stinging again (Tsk!), not there.

Looked in me black bags, not there.

An hour later I found it where I first looked for it! Fool! I’d put it back in its karki wallet and was looking for the black camera in me search!

Hey-ho. Got the diary finished and did some Facebooking.

Did some sorting – slowly, the shoulder still hurting badly for some reason since the nurse changed the dressing?

I went back on the laptop and searched City Homes eventually finding confirmation of my being accepted for the flat at Woodthorpe Court.

Feel a bit better now.

Still coughing and a-wheezing mind.

Had me nosh.

Patties curried beans, bacon and sausage. Rated it 7.9/10

Set to sorting, bit of shredding and then felt suddenly had a nasty dizzy-spell, felt drained beyond belief.

Just had to get me head down.

Poor old git!

TTFN folks.

Sat 20th June 2015 : Inchcock Today – Working away…

Saturday 18th June 2015

Woke around 0520hrs. The little Inch had been bleeding again – cleaned it up.

No memories of dreams at all – just know I had them and didn’t like them.

Got up feeling confused and still tired and got the laptop on.

Replied to some emails and messages then set about starting this diary and realised I’d not made a cuppa!

Put that right and took me morning medications.

Awaited arrival of fodder delivery, and did some shredding while I waited.

Soon had  a big bag of stuff made up for the Nottingham Hospice Charity shop.

send.

Set of on a walk into Sherwood with it.

As walked from the flea-pit to Mansfield Road I couldn’t resist taking a photo of the pavement.

I know we have crop-circles all over the world, but Pavement Circles was a new one to me?

It had just stopped raining, but I don’t know if that had anything to do with them?

Odd that, I’ll check next time I poddle that way.

Up the hill and down into Sherwood, up the next hill and on to the Hospice shop at the top of it.

Not many folks or traffic around yet.

Pavement cyclist in abundance in Sherwood, but they were too quick for me photograph em – Swines!

Limped up the Hospice shop and gave them me stuff, and collected me bags from last time.

When I came out, the Nottingham citizenry had awoke and were milling around in great numbers.

Halfway back at the top of the first hill, and no pedestrians about there only traffic.

I decided to walk down a bit further and call at the Lidl shop to get some of their bug bags to use for me sorting later.

I got some funny looks when I queued up with me 10 bags a pint of mike.

Hehehe!

So I took em back to the flea-pit with the two I’d got back from the Nottingham Hospice shop.

Made a cuppa and tool me midday medications.

Had a pot noodle what I got last week cause they were on offer at half price – 50p. Sorry I did now, it wer crap! Eughh!y

Finished of some graphics of Shirley Blamey and Mike Steeden and pt them in their gallery on Facebook. Then sent her them via email.

Feeling guilty I got on with this Diary up to here and then got on with some sorting of me rubbish like… fer several hours!

Well shattered now, poor old thing.

Packed a few bags with kitchen and cleaning stuff, moved the other stuff, made a mess doing it, spilt bird seed all over to join the shredded paper I spilt earlier when trying to pack it into a potato bag.

Mayhem Pandamonium and Help!

Going to read me book and have summat to nosh now, then take me evening medications.

Tried to ring BJ but he was not answering belss him.

Drained is how I feel really.

Hello, did yer miss me??? The internet connection went down for a few minute then. BT? Huh!

Decided to add the Nosh photo I took earlier – but could not find the camera?

Eventually after an hour I did find it.

Mixed Veg, sausages and potatoes, with Polish brown bread.

Rated: 8.4/10.

Fri 19.06.15: Inchcock Today: Back to sorting and shredding!

Friday 19th June 2015

Woke around 0345hrs.

Coughing and a-wheezing – oh dear!

Put old laptop on and finished and posted yesterdays Diary.

The shoulder is easier than before I had the wound cleaned, so I can get on with some sorting out and shredding later.

There won’t be much recorded today as I’ll be rather busy don’t yer know?

Tesco order coming at noon, hope to bag-up most of the stuff up ready to take with me to the new flat.

Updated DrawPlusx6 and tried to make header in it – no chance!

Made a cuppa and took medications.

WC’d, ‘Little Inch’ bleeding again – and the haemmorhoids too! Huh!

Had a scratch at me dressing on me back – it’s already coming loose! Another Tsk!

Did some Facebooking as I waited for it to get light enough fer me get missen sorted (Damned candles! – only joking).

Got some lovely comments today on WordPress and Facebook.

Me first cuppa went cold so I made another then fed the pigeons at the front door.

Surprisingly only three came down this morning and they were the young ones.

Getting independant now.

Got fully carried away when I got involved in trying to work our serif draw and managed to do a graphic for TFZ’s Lynda Lore. Lsto many more hours trying to remember and work out how I did it in the first place and couldn’t do it again. Tsk!

Got a wash and brush up ready for the delivery and sorting to start – I may regret this?

Tesco delivery came.

Nosh of sausage and bacon sarnies.

So tired now.

TTFN.

Thu 18 June 2015: Sheltered Flat Hunt – progress at last!

Thursday 18th June 2015

Woke around 0420hrs – really tried to remember the dreams I’d had, but only vague bits came to me. Something about being chased by women in an abandoned office block?

When I moved to answer the call to the porcelain I noticed the pain from the wound was a lot less – that’ll soon be put to rights by the Obergruppenfurher Practise nurse this afternoon mind, when she rips off the dressing cleans the wound and applies another dressing?

Some blood from the haemmoroids this morning. The sore throat was rampant still, the voice sounded a bit better to me, less croaky. The angina and arthritis was calm and passive. The duodenal ulcer no bother. The reflux valve beahaving itself nicely. Little Inch not bleeding, although the lesion seems to be widening? And, yesterday I had only one dizzy spell. Things looking good… perhaps I shouldn’t have said that?

Made a cuppa and took me medications, put the water heater on. Then strted this old laptop to finish and post yesterdays Inchcock Today.

Then did an extra post in rhyme (Of sorts) about me flat hunting recently and got it done.

Then made a funny post about life when you get old like.

Had a wash and brush-up.

Then went down and made another cuppa and got the new laptop on to do the graphics for them and get it posted.

Susan from Nottingha City Homes rang to confirm she’d put in a bid for me for the 72 Woodthorpe Flat in the high-rise block. She said she’d ting me back wit the result.

I set off on me walk to Colville Court to meet Steve.

I’d only got about 5oo yeards and the mobile rang. It stopped before I could answer, it was from Susan. During the walk I rang back 23 times, unfortnately all I got on each call was three beeps and no connection?

I waited outside the complex fro 15 minutes for Steve to arrive – during which a pillock on an illegal mini-motorbike kept belting by as his continually ran around the block. It was at this stage I made me mind up not to apply to live there – no point in escaping one set of yobs to find another at the new place?

When Steve arrived we went inside to view some of the flats. I must admit they were goreous, well thought out, and in mint condition, even though a bit more rent than the Council ones. But the local yobs had put me off by then.

I had a chin-wag with Steve and he rand Susan to confirm my interest in the flat at Woodthorpe (Sherwood).

Steve was on holiday next week, but he arranges with Sue for me go and sign the paperwork and sort options out on Monday 29th June, and I was assured it was mine despite the long wait.

My internet contributions will be reduced now, as I have to press on getting things sorted and ready for the move? Please bear with me folks.

Left Steve and walked into town to see if the EE shop could increase my allowance on the sim-card hire. But couldn’t provide them with enough details. I reckon they have een lost in the sorting out process? Oh dear.

Caught the bus home and updated this diary.

Have go in a bit to have me wound cleaned and redressed at the GP surgery.

Hard to say how I feel at the moment – so glad to have got somewhere but unsure if I’ve done the right thing if yer know what I mean.

And so worried about sorting it all out and getting it into order – but Steve will be back on the 29th and will advise and guide me I’m sure.

He said to concentrate on getting stuff I aim to take with me ready for transportation first.

Might treat missen to a lamb shank, potatoes and garden peas nosh tonight. Got to use up the freezer stuff – mind you, I’ve got to use up the dated stuff as well… Oh dear…

Went to see Nurse and was seen to early – all cleaned and re-dressed. I’ve not got to get it wet and to be careful she said, any bleeding and come back to see her. It feels much easier now though – mind you, it was bad.

So I’ll see how I go with starting some sorting again in the morning.

Hobbled back to the dump added this to diary and got me nosh cooking.

Rated 4/10.

The lamb shank was from Tesco. It was not very good, the gravy tastless, the peas (Also Tesco brand) were a tad bitter, but the potatoes (Lidl) were okay.

I was so tired out and soon got me head down after sending an email to PAtti Berkert telling her about the flat. She’s been through so much and is finally getting herself better, and has been such a caring friend. Thanks Patti.

TTFN all.

What has Inchcock learnt? Words of Wisdom for Whippersnappers to digest

Here They Are:

* The ability to lose things, animal, material and imaginary!

* The ability to get the wrong end of the stick!

* The ability to avoid winning any raffles, games, lotteries, hearts, or even coming as high as in the top ten!

* The ability to lodge oneself up the noses of all around me!

* The ability to be the only one out of 16 lads walking down the promenade at 0600hrs in the morning, who get bitten by the lone wandering mongrel dog that attacked us!

* The ability to be injured and immobile, and still fall off of the hospital trolley!

* The ability to fall asleep on the bus and wake up at the local Bus Station depot, unsure of who got the bigger shock, me or the poor bus cleaner!

* The ability to get peoples names wrong, and/or forget peoples names on a regular basis!

* The ability to misplace hearing aids, spectacles, remote controls, memory sticks, camera, pens, bus-passes, medications, mobile phones, keys, clothing, hats, and even spoons!

* The ability to end up with odd socks at the launderette on every visit!

* The ability to take me 6 morning medications at night, and your 8 evening medications in the morning!

* The ability to go into a room, and forget more often than not what you went into that room for!

* The ability to ring the wrong number on the telephone!

* The ability to be completely ignored at Bank queues, Business office queues, Job Centre queues, Hospital queues, Shop counter queues, Inquiry desk queues, Café queues, Pub queues, Council Benefits qeues and by the general public at large!

* The ability to lose total and absolute control of all and any emissions of wind from me anus!

* The ability to scare people horrendously when I smile and say ‘Good Morning’ to them!

* The ability to lipread wrongly!

* The ability to get on the wrong bus!

* The ability to maintain me life of sorts, despite your constant failings and depression!

* The ability to tell the truth – this will get you nowhere, I know, it just confuses the bosses and politicians!

* The ability to want to help others – a futile quality!

* The ability to eat however much one puts on the plate!

* The ability to almost see me feet looking down passed me ever expanding bouncy belly!

* The ability to walk past a Barbers shop without noticing his prices!

* The ability to remember things from years ago!

* The ability to forget things that happened an hour ago!

* The ability to enjoy using carbolic soap!

* The ability to realise that the adage ‘You can’t teach an old dog new tricks’ is valid!

* The ability to realise that ‘Old age people are measured as an economic liability and a social burden!

* The ability to realise that ‘Old age is a mental attitude as well as a physical problem’!

* The ability to become a sociopath, and enjoy it!

* The ability to realise that: When you live by yourself, all of your annoying habits are suddenly gone.

* The ability to understand what W. Somerset Maugham meant by ‘An unfortunate thing about this world is that the good habits are much easier to give up than the bad ones’

* The ability to accept and dwell in ones missed opportunities!

* The excellently honed and perfected ability to have the hospital staff in tears of laughter!

* An ability to present myself as a target for Pavement Cyclist and mobility scooter drivers everytime I venture out.

If you are lucky enough to live long enough, many of these attributes will come to you, wanted or not.

So make the best of things now kids, and good luck!

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