Tag: Satire

Inchcock Today Sat 18 June 2016: Chemist Whoopsiedangleplop and Baked cheesy potatoes the highlight of the day!

07

Saturday 18th June 2016

Before I stirred at 0520hrs, I was having a dream of, even for me; Great confusion. This time, once again, I could recall a lot of bits of it:

  • Hundreds of school desks, all I could find in mine was giant bars of carbolic soap?
  • The teacher in an SS Uniform with leprechaun assistants was checking along the lines of tables and patting everyone on the head, blessing them and giving each of them a lollipop for keeping their books and pens tidy?
  • I was panicking as they drew near to checking my desk – I lifted the top and jumped inside the desk to hide?
  • I found myself instantly in a sewer being chased by giant rats, next bit confused, but they caught up with me and handed me a bus-pass, telling me I’d dropped it when I fell in through the chimney? They lifted me up through a manhole…
  • I was in the middle of a dual carriageway (Confused again) – Found I was in a police cell that had been painted pink with flower pattern tea cups and saucers on the Noddy desk… Policemen were interviewing me, one with a long beard kept clouting me over my head with his plastic truncheon? 
  • Held in a cell overnight, in the morning I had Spike Milligan as my lawyer, we were sat on commodes talking…
  • I was, to be charged with failing to make my mind up on the Brexit issue?

I’m sure, there must have been more happenings, but could not remember them. But what I did recall was more than I usually do and bits were rather lucid too.

The £300 second-hand noisy recliner worked, and I got out of it and to the porcelain room. I had what must have been the longest lasting weewee of my life. I thought it would never end! Still, no bleeding this morning from anywhere.

Into the kitchen and got the kettle on – the view out through the window of the copse below brought a smile to my face.

Bootiful!

As I took the medications, I pondered… I’d forgotten to fetch the prescriptions yesterday, so I can have a walk into Carrington to get them later, or leave it until when I go for the INR test? I’ll never hang myself, far too much of a vacillator.

Got the Friday post finished and commenced this one. Facebooking for a few hours got caught up at last.

Got ready, shave shower and sh… the rest of the stuff like. Then off on my walk into Carrington for fetch the prescriptions and get some potatoes to make some cheesy baked spuds to have with me last ‘Not-yet-burnt’ minted lamb chops’ Then I realised I couldn’t cook them together, so decided on a beef slice with the tatties. Hehe!

Had an absolutely marvellous shower and did my ablutions. Used the orange shower gel today.

Caught buses back – oh me poor feet!

Off on the walk to the chemist shop.

No sun shining but is a pleasant enough day and the rain kept off.

I called en route to see how BJ was. But, he wasn’t in.

I thought I’d taken a photo of his street, but it didn’t come put on the screen.

Decided not to use the camera until I could find out what I’d done wrong or what had caused the annoying mini Whoopsiedangleplop!

On to the Lidl food store and had a wander around. Getting some bits en route: Tin of tomatoes with basil, jelly babies, mild chicken curry, BBQ ketchup (Catnip in America I think?), Natural and lemon yoghourts and some baking potatoes.

Caught the bus back, because me feet and knees were giving me some grief by then. Got another one for the three stops up Winchester Street Hill.

Got in the flat, wee-wee’d and made a cuppa. Took the midday medications. Then I got the laptop on and updated this to here and tried the camera out by taking a photo from the kitchen window.

Seemed to work okay? How it didn’t work earlier… Another mystery to take to my grave with me?

Got the potatoes in the oven and then checked the emails, a lot had come in since this morning.

Did some graphicalisationing on CorelDraw. Then did some Facebooking.

Checked the baking potatoes, turned them over,

Then applied some antiseptic cream to the burnt fingers. Tsk! 

Huh!

Finished the Facebooking, turned off the laptop and wee-wee’d with great involuntarily sustained persistence once again.

One of the baked potatoes skins had split, so I decided to get the flesh of both of them and spent ages mashing and mixing. I sprinkled some vinegar, sea salt and a lot of grated mature cheese with the potato for ages, then spread the mixture on an oven tray and forked the top of it to allow for quick browning and returned it to the oven, along with beef slices.

Half an hour later, it looked okay, and I served it up without burning my fingers this time.

Some tomatoes were added to this.

I scooped some of the cheesy potatoes into the surviving husks, dipped it in a bit of BBQ sauce, ate the split skins, and I dined away. The potatoes tasted lovely, wish I’d made more of and just ate them alone, now.

Planned to watch some TV after viewing some DVD. Kept nodding off, though. Reckon I got off proper around 0100hrs… with a very contented tummy, though! Hehe!

Inchcock Today – Sat 11 June 2016: Poor day

So let’s not assume, let’s try to understand others, please

Saturday 11th June 2016

Woke around 0400hrs, and as I started to mentally work out what was happening, and make sense of the dreams I’d had, I nodded off again.

Stirred again around 0510hrs, feeling a different person. Aching all over, heavy eyes, Anne Gyna giving me some grief, struggling with breathing a bit, although Arthur Itis was being gentle with me, the stomach was churning and the right arm/wrist painful. I wasn’t feeling too good at all overall. I wondered if I’d dreamt it, the waking up earlier?

The rumbling soon changed into a bodily demand for the Throne to be utilised. I risked using the throne, due to the severity of the needs, and the warm wet sensation that informed of the rear end was bleeding badly. But dare not yet use the sink or shower for fear of the flooring not yet being settled and ready to accept any water. But of course, I didn’t know, because no one has explained anything to me about when I could use it?

Taking a photograph while leaning out of the kitchen window, I had an involuntary passing of wind, and a dizzy spell. An Odd sensation that, hehe!

This reminded me to take me medications with a cuppa and do the BP tests. The stomach continues to grind away, I suppose ‘delicate’ would be the optimum word to describe how I felt.

Readings looked fine to me; Sys 143, Dia 74, Pulse 88 Temp 67.

Got the laptop on and started this page off, did the graphics for it, then remembered I’d not took me medications yet, made another cuppa and did so.

Facebooked for a few hours and decided to check the few Saturday buses available on the timetable. One every two hours, a total of three buses, so got me stand up wash and set off for the bus stop to go to Arnold and Asda to get the photographs printed.

Chinwag at the bus stop. In Arnold, I went in Wilko, got Dettol, shower gel and antiperspirant.

Boyles Store next, the bags was filling up now.

The Market Place looked a bit sad.

Then to Asda, ordered the photos and paid for them, got the receipt and spent more in the store, casserole veg, turnip, apples, bananas and beetroot. Collected the photographs and made my way to the bus stop.

Sat reading my book on the bench just beyond the stop.

Twenty minutes later as the bus arrived, I stood up and realised the set had been damp, I squelched onto the bus.

Hehe!

Back at the flats had a gossip with some residents. Frank told me not to use the shower gel, and it blocked the drain in his place. Now they tell me!

Got the nosh ready.

Battered whole onion rings, beetroot, tomatoes, sausages, bugles, red onions and pepper in oil.

Followed by an apple. The ham cob I only ate a few bites of. (Guilt yer know!)

Sister Jane rang to remind me of the England match on tonight and told me Nottingham City Centre had been blocked off due to crowd trouble between Fascists and Muslim supporters.

Oh dear!

I put the TV on to see comments on the upcoming game and…

More violence!

The match itself, England should have won, shame.

 More violence in the ground this time when the game ended.

The well organised Russians attacked the English fans.

Terrible! I felt infelicitous towards mankind.

The rumbling innards didn’t seem to matter so much now.

The frenzied violence had put me on a low.

Inchcock Today Thu 2 June 2016: Hectic day again… Tsk!

Thursday 2nd June 2016

Up 0450hrs. Manoeuvred out of the second hand £300 recliner chair and to the porcelain throne. I remembered about the bathroom door being the other way around this time. No bleeding from either of the lower region areas, good! But the knees were getting a lot of bother from Arthur Itis again.

Put the kettle on, got the ablution items as needed. Then took the medications.

Sorted the nibbles into the bag, for the Tenants Social Hour later.

Janet Arron and Henry

Laptop on and did some TFZ graphicalisationing, Emails, WordPressing and even had a go on Tetris.

This one of the graphics I got done, it is of Janet Arron, a beauty from the TFZ site, with Henry, her adorable impish kitten.

An official letter arrived, from the Police Pegasus team, they wanted an update on the details held.

Deana, Interviewing me!

0805hrs: Kevin, my maintenance man, arrived, made him a cuppa, and we had a chinwag. He set to working.

0909hrs; Deana Walker came to do the tenants interview.

She also supplied her details for me to put on the Trusted Contacts list on Pegasus for the Nottingham Chief Constable.

We managed to have a natter, in between the official form filling, well, entering it onto her laptop.

Bless her cotton socks.

The Dynamic Drill

Kev worked on the tiling in the bathroom for a couple of hours.

Then he fetched the gigantic drill in, got his helmet, ear muffs and smoke mask on and started digging away kindly keeping the bathroom door closed while he did so.

Looked to me that he was doing a good job of the tiles.

He then started on the drilling of the floor.

I observed that the door opened and concealed the light switch string behind it.

Light switch cord is now is hidden behind the door. Kevin pointed out that an electrician will be coming to move the switch to the other side later on some time.

I set off for the Tenants Social Hour at the community shed.

So few folks there today, I reckon no more than 15 in all?

I missed the raffle and forgot to pay for my tea – Oh dear. I’ll pay double next week.

We all seemed to be happy and made the best of it, though.

I got myself ready and set off to the bus stop for the trip to the clinic.

Bid Kevin farewell and down to the foyer, where I had a gossip with some fellow tenants, and we all left to catch the bus.

I was soon at the clinic. Booked me in, and took a seat in the waiting area. I was called in shortly. By a different doctor again, I’ve never seen the same doctor more than once at this clinic. The usual embarrassing examinations under highly lit magnifying tubes by several female attendants. Many, oohs and ahs later, they decided I should continue with the same treatment, and I was sent off.

Slab Square dancing today

Bus into town and went to the bank for some cash first. Then had a wander around.

There were some dancers in the slab square near the temporary food courts, and so many of the Nottinghamians joined in.

I went in Primark to get some more loose fitting undies, but they had none in stock. Tsk! I did get some of the warm long sleeved shirts. I got three while they had them in stock, at £6 each.

Out and went to the Spar shop to get one of their £1 bacon butties as a treat.

They were giving away copies of the sun for free!

I also got one of the TV papers for next week, like the one I got last week, like this one, although more costly, is so much easier to read.

I surreptitiously slipped the pigeons some pellets.

Caught the L9 bus back to the flats.

By gum, Kevin has been so busy today.

The tiles were nearly finished, the floor had been readied for the application of the shower tiles.

Made him a cuppa and managed a chinwag.

He told me of his camera, a Nikon Bridge P900 model. I looked them up on the web and was very impressed with them.

He’s going to bring his in tomorrow and show me the workings. Kind of him that. I reckon when I get the curtains sorted, one of these might be my expenditure?

He left it all neat and tidy again. Even put a board down so I didn’t fall into the hole in the floor and warned me about it.

Laptop on and updated this claptrap.

Got the oven warming up, to cook the meal for tonight.

Too tired now to do any more graphics.

Checked the TV paper to see if owt worth watching might be on the goggle-box tonight.

Ah, of course, the England Match vs. Portugal. I hope they haven’t found another Eusébio da Silva Ferreira? Hehe! A bit too tasty he was on the pitch he was!

Got the nosh done and watched the match eating from a tray on my knee on the second-hand £300 recliner… Luxury!

What a disappointing match it was!

No bread was eaten with this excellent meal again tonight.

(Smug Mode Adopted, Hehe!)

The early dreams were of my labascating down cliffs and off of buildings again, but never landing anywhere, just moved onto another thing to fall off of?

Hey-ho!

Brexit – In or Out? Inchcock remains puzzled!

The lesser educated pensioner of Nottingham, Inchcock, continues his quest to find a resolution to his decision on which way to vote in the Brexit Election

I think the lad needs some help.

George (Never had a job) Osborne:

It is my “responsibility” to warn on the risks to people’s jobs, standards too!

Millions of pensioners could find themselves worse off if the UK quits the European Union, George Osborne claims. Also, Cameron has won many concessions from Brussels?

He also said way back, that he would never increase VAT.

Compare and contrast. Here is the answer that George Osborne gave, in December last year, when asked whether he would consider campaigning for Britain to leave the EU.

“We have said that we rule out nothing. If you rule nothing out, you rule nothing out!”

Now here is the answer Mr Osborne gave today, to the MPs of the Treasury select committee in Parliament, when asked what would happen if Britain did indeed leave the EU.

“What’s absolutely clear is that our public finances would take a significant hit because the economy would be weaker, people’s incomes would be less than they would otherwise be, businesses wouldn’t be as profitable. And that would mean that our public finances would be around £36 billion worse off – dwarfing any supposed money we would get by not making a contribution to the EU. We would be very significantly worse off, and that would have an impact on public services like the NHS.” He added that as well as being “poorer” we would be “less secure”.

Look at those two statements. The Chancellor is now saying, with total certainty, that Brexit would make us £36 billion worse off, grievously damage the NHS, and leave us more vulnerable to terrorism and war.

The Chancellor spoke twice about the importance of Britain ‘living within its means’. Of course, this should be a basic principle of all good financial housekeeping and practically every sane person would agree with it.

Unfortunately, although Osborne talks of ‘living within our means’, the truth is that he has been the most profligate Chancellor in British history. Our national debt is likely to have doubled to just under £2 trillion under his stewardship of the nation’s finances.

Well, that didn’t help me to make my mind up!

The Cameron Threats:

He claims that a Brexit Vote is immoral? I think perhaps that sending troops to their deaths to kill, bomb and maim ordinary citizens all over the world is immoral?

Mr Cameron, speaking as the Treasury published an analysis warning that a British exit from the EU would plunge the country into a year-long recession and cost as many as 820,000 jobs in just two years. 

The report was criticised by leading Tory Eurosceptics such as Boris Johnson, who said it was a “hoax”, and the former Cabinet minister Iain Duncan Smith, who said it was “not an honest assessment but a deeply biassed view of the future”.

The Treasury document said that in the worst case scenario GDP will fall by 6 per cent, house prices by 18 per cent and the deficit will rise by £39 billion. The pound would drop 15 per cent. 

Speaking at the head office of B&Q in Hampshire, Mr Cameron said that, given these risks to the British economy, a Remain vote was the “moral” choice for voters.

Knowing Cameron and Osborne’s acts and decisions requiring vadiation, will get no such thing, but it they did it could not be believed…  This doesn’t help me to make my mind up!

Scottish Labour Party

 Then I read somewhere about Scottish Labour party leader Kezia Dugdale who  has pledged to support Britain’s continued membership of the EU but others will be allowed to campaign for a Leave vote, a Scottish Labour spokesperson said.

 Well, that didn’t help me to make my mind up!

Scaremongering from all.

 Some

David Cameron has been accused of “scaremongering” by his own MPs after warning that Britain’s exit from the EU could see Calais’ Jungle move onto the south coast of England.

With negotiations over Britain’s membership ongoing and a referendum likely to happen as early as June, both the “stay” and “leave” campaigns have ramped up their warnings of what kind of terrible things will happen depending on which way the vote goes.

But following Cameron’s latest suggestion, and a host of other “warning” headlines in sections of the media, Eurosceptics have hit back at what they clearly think are ridiculous assertions on the part of the pro-EU campaigners.

And yes, those Ukippers, Tory Eurosceptics and even Louise Mensch have managed to be funny…

This doesn’t help me to make my mind up!

The Leave.EU site published:

Leaving the EU would give us back control of our borders

  • The UK is currently obliged to accept ALL persons entering from Europe, regardless of skill level.
  • The UK public is increasingly concerned  by open borders, a recent poll by The Economist/Ipsos MORI found that immigration is now the most prominent issue on the UK’s political agenda.
  • 1.5 Million EU migrants moved to the UK between 2004 and 2010. Most of them were low-skilled. Low-skilled EU migrants can often deprive British citizens of jobs in the low-skilled end of the labour market.
  • By contrast, more and more non-EU visa applicants are skilled, yet the UK’s non-EU visa cap (for skilled labour) was filled within the first 6 months of 2015.
  • Migration accounts for one third of the deficit in social housing and undoubtedly puts pressure on public services as a whole. 

As the world’s fifth biggest economy, the UK is well placed to supply its own labour. So it would make sense for UK immigration policy to be tailored towards filling any employment shortfalls, with the freedom to draw specialist skills from a global talent pool.

Given the current free movement of people within the EU, Britain’s attempts to reduce net migration have led to incredibly tight restrictions on non-EU students and workers. Leaving the EU would ensure that the very best and brightest minds could come to the UK – wherever in the world they are from. What’s more, an overall cap on migration would allow the UK to ease some of the current (huge) pressure on public services.

Well, that didn’t help me to make my mind up!

Vote Leave published this:

A dossier of murders and rapes committed by 50 EU criminals in Britain has been published by a leading out campaign, in a move described by critics as “scaremongering of the worst kind”.
Vote Leave, which has its campaign committee chaired by the justice secretary, Michael Gove, listed 14 murders and other homicides committed by EU citizens in the UK, including the murder of 14-year-old Alice Gross by the Latvian Arnis Zalkalns.

The dossier also listed rapes by Lithuanian, Polish and Slovakian men with convictions in their home countries. The document quotes Lady Justice Hallett asking: “Do we have to take in anybody, even if they have a conviction for raping a child? OF course we do while were are in the Euro!” 

It is believed that a list of hundreds of criminal charges bought last week against, specifically Eastern European immigrants was witheld, on the orders of a Government Minister.

This doesn’t help me to make my mind up, but it did make me think a bit!

Eventually, I ran out of time and enthusiasm in my search to discover which way to vote.

After all, in a General election, we cannot trust or believe anything that the candidates say.

Thatcher, Blair, Brown and Cameron all failed to find honesty or openness, thus any trust from the electorate.

Then I saw this?

I’m more confused than ever now! Humph!

Inchcock Today Thu 19 May 2016: Tenants Social Hour missed, but Some anacreontic moments shared

Thursday 19 May 2016

After getting off to sleep so early last night, I sparked into life this morning around 0255hrs, had to climb out of the recliner because the mechanism refused to perform the lowering motion. (Good start to the day!)

To the bathroom throne, a bit of bleeding but not much this morning. However, I did notice the usual blubbery mass hanging around my midriff was getting decidedly larger! Decided I must try to control my amandation for fattening foods.

Carried out the BP and other tests. Sys 155 Dia 69 Pul 69, seems alright. I put the record of these in the bag to show the nurse later.

I went to get the nibbles for the nurses, and… Dang dang dang DANG… I found the missing Alarm Wristlet! What a plonker!

Did some Facebooking. Ablutions carried out, nibbles for the nurses and Hut staff collected and set off to the Winwood Hut. Deana not there so I apologised to Julie, grovelled magnificently and gave her some nibbles. Then I set out on the walk to Dr Vindla’s surgery for the INR level tests.

Walking to the surgery I espied to this gentleman had parked on a one-way street, the right way, but on double yellow lines about 15ft from the T-junction with the main road.

Naughty boy!

He noticed me taking the shot and moved off.

Pressed on in the warm and un-windy conditions and the feet started giving me a lot of jip. Tsk! Still, the left knee was not as bad as yesterday.

Got in the surgery and settled to wait, reading me war book. It was the Obergruppenfurher Nurse on duty today again. She decided to take the blood from the other arm, and it hurt for the first time in years, and a feint trace of a smile came over her face. Bless her!

However, although she moaned about not having much time, she did look at the BP record and wrote down if the Sys is below 140, and the Dia is below 90 let them know. Which confused me a bit, cause the Dia has never been as high as 90? Gave her the nibbles, and made my way dangerously to the bus-stop to get one to Arnold. I say dangerously because of the two young ragamuffin Pavement cyclists that very nearly had me and a few other pedestrians with their weaving at speed through the crowds. By the time I got the camera out they were well away and mixed in the distance with the poor pedestrians.

In Arnold, I walked to Wilko and got some more of the Special Offer lavender Dettol and a packet of bath salts: I might not need these for long, though, with the shower conversion almost due?

Then to Asda to get the photographs printed and collect the pressie I ordered for a particular personage, of a mug with his photo on it. But… I could not print any pictures out due to the flaming SHCD or whatever its card, having been broken and lost the corner plastic and the machine would not read it.

Hey-ho! So I did some shopping, got carried away again, but most of the cost was on salad stuff as part of my new ‘Reduce-the-stomach-size campaign’. Hehe! I got: Fresh Bistro Salad pack, Tomatoes, radishes, potatoes, a turnip, carrots, beetroot cubes and red onions. I thought, that for tomorrow a vegetable casserole? Tonight a salad, with the chicken thighs I forgot to mention like? 

Disappointed at being thwarted with the photograph mission, I made my way to the bus stop. Had a long wait, but the weather was beautiful. Interesting collision twixt two Vauxhall Corsas en route, but of course the camera had no card for me to record it.

Stayed awake for the journey to the flats (Just).

I got the veg prepared and into the Crock-pot, potatoes, carrots, parsnip, red onion, tomatoes, Oregano, basil, tomato puree and a splash of vinegar. I’ll see how that comes out tastewise.

Swapped the card from the other camera into the best one.

Laptop on and updated this, checked the emails: Sister Jane had sent one, providing she is feeling up to it, they will be calling to see me in the morning around 11 o’clock. Cheered me up a bit.

Then, BJ rang back, he had a great holiday in Ireland. Sounded a bit perkier the lad did.

Got the salad plate laid out, just added the potatoes and my lip were then smacking.

A strawberry (Small one of course, ahem!) trifle to follow.

Very enjoyable it was too.

Rated this as a good one. 9.3/10.

Watched some Hustle episodes again. I think this series is so entertaining and dryly humorous.

Nodded off early, that was nice for a change.

TTFN all.

Inchcock Today Wed 18 May 16: Deana (Flats Coordinator) to the rescue!

Wednesday 18 May 2016

Up and out of my recliner (Working again) chair and to the ‘tinkle room’. Little Inchy bleeding just a tiny bit. Heavy duty passage was okay.

Remembered that Deana (Complex Coordinatoress) is coming today to sort out a replacement wrist alarm – oh dear!

Made a cuppa and took the medications, did the BP checks then got yesterday’s diary finished and did some graphicationalisationing.

A quick check on emails and Facebook then did the ablutions.

The drizzle started, it looks like it may be going to settle in.

After several hours spent searching in one last effort to find the lost alarm and no Deana arriving, I wrote a note on a stick it thingy, explaining I’d gone to see her and I would be back if she is not there, to adhere to the door when I left to do so. (But I forgot to stick it on the door, cause going out, I had to go back for my hearing aids, Huh!). Deana and Julie were in the hut. Deana had forgotten about the replacement alarm and had also forgotten to take it with her when she visited the flats earlier. I told her not to worry as I was an expert nowadays on forgetting and losing things. She said she’ll be up later. Hope she is not too late, cause I want to go and get some chips, bread and fresh vegetables.

Returned to the min-apartment and waited.

Did some more graphicalisationing and emailed Sister Jane, then Deana arrived: She was in a rush, gave me a reprimand or two, instructed me to give her the Wristlet if I found it later. She set-up the new one, then gave me a friendly smile as she left.

I think she might have forgiven me?

It was starting to spit with rain again; however, I ventured out for a walk up and through the park into Sherwood. Not a single footpath cyclist was seen en route at all, whatsoever… none, I was almost shocked! Mind you, the rain might have had something to do with it?

I took a nice photograph from underneath the mini-umbrella as I started down the hill towards the shopping area.

The left knee started giving way from here on and for the rest of the day? With the right one, that is usually the worst of the two playing up, I began regretting not taking the walking stick with me, Tsk! But that would have been interesting fumbling with the stick, the brolly and the shopping bag. Haha!

I only went into the Co-op store to shop, because I had the money-off vouchers, £1 off frozen foods and 50p off when I spend over £5. The veg I wanted was not in a good condition, short dated and wrinkled like. However, they did have the Blitz kitchen towels on offer again, so I got a three-pack, a packet of vegetable crisps (Beetroot, carrots & parsnip), Wholemeal loaf, Low-fat Oven Chips (McCains – horrible and tasteless!) and some marshmallows on offer 50p off two bags.

The rain had all but stopped when I got out of the store and made my way limpingly back to and through Woodthorpe Grange Park and down to the flats. However…

Hobbling by the copse on the gravel path down to the flats, I came across some of these flowers in amongst the weeds, dandelions, daisies and buttercups I came across.Wondered what they were like?

Wondered what they were like?

The wildflowers there all looked beautiful.

When I arrived at Inchcock Towers, I did my best to clean the wet, mud and grass from the shoes. But still had to wash them in the sink with the scrubbing brush, then clean the sink and brush, and when I’d dried them best I could and went to put them near the door, where I found some mail had been delivered – the left knee gave a terrible twinge and gave way. Huh! Walking about like a poor cripple for an hour or so. If I get to see the ‘Nice’ nurse in the morning, I’ll mention it to her, see what he says. The pain doesn’t feel like the work of Arthur Itis?

Made a cuppa and took the medications, slipped one extra codeine phosphate in amongst them. It (the knee) eased off after a while and I felt only the usual Arthur Itis bother after. Seems that it is coming on only after I’ve been doing a bit of hobbling.

Set to making the nosh, as was getting exhausted for some reason again.

Sliced up a large tomato, beetroot, beef slice, wholemeal bread partially buttered and the terrible oven chips (Eurgh!) followed by two small tubs of ice-cream.

Despite the tasteless chips, I ate it all up, though.

Washed the pots, then put the INR result sheet in my pocket for the mornings INR blood tests.

Watched some Hustle episodes from the DVD, but soon nodded off – blissfully.

Inchcock Today Sun 15 2016: Ineptitude in abundance today

Sunday 15th May 2016

After waking up agitated many times throughout the night and having fruitless searches for the Wrist Alarm, I finally got off to sleep around 0300hrs and had some odd dreams again. The first and the most memorable was (Sorry the graphic didn’t come out well, but you get the idea?) about me in a room with floorboards with a hole neatly cut out of them. And, below was a blue ocean with a speedboat that was attached to the end of my green oven glove and I was attempting to tug it free? The second one I recall, I was in a delivery van I drove many, many years ago and had lost my shoes and could not reach the pedals? Odd?

Around 0330hrs, I sprang awake, again in need of the Throne and again, it was painful. Although feeling tired, I decided to stay up and have what turned out to be another futile search for the Wrist Alarm that went missing in action yesterday. Not feeling comfortable at all with this losing and forgetting things lately.

Got the kettle on and made a cuppa, took the medications and got the laptop on to do the diaries.

The sun was out early (0525hrs) when noises from somewhere I could not identify started off, a bit like drilling and gurgling? Not often this happens.

Made another cuppa and a pot of porridge.

A nicely prospective day, coming perhaps?

It looked likely from the kitchen window around 0630hrs.

Checked the emails: Loads of junk over the last two day. 

Checked out Facebook. WordPressed a little, then made yet another brew in the small mug that is new, see, a poet I am, I tell you. Hehe!

Decided to do some cleaning today.

Despite not feeling too good, as a self-punishment for losing the Wristlet alarm and not being able to find it. So I got the togs and set about doing the laundry. While the washing machine worked, I took some bottle to the bank at the end of the road, and three bags of rubbish to the chute. Then moved the washing into the laundry room dryer, having a little chinwag with a couple of tenants.

Back up on the lift to update this, and got the window cleaning gear out ready to tackle them later. Then down to collect the dried clothes. Another little gossip. And then back up to he apartment.

Put away the clobber in the airing cupboard.

Still irritated with myself, I set about doing the flat windows. Did the outside of the living room first. The main result were:

  1. I nearly fell off the step ladder several times.
  2. I used liquid soda first off, thinking it was the window cleaning spray, and it took ages to get it off and start again.
  3. I trapped my right thumb between the door and railing when it blew open and I tried to stop them colliding like. 
  4. Used three rolls of paper towels and all the Asda window cleaner spray and had to use the Morrison one too.
  5. Moved on to the kitchen windows, trapping forefinger in the release mechanism.
  6. The window flaked of rust and grime as I opened it and cleaning it up off of the ledge and floor caused the back to start off.
  7. Took a photograph of the cleaned windows fro a distance to avoid you seeing the fact that in the living room ones, I had appeared to just moved the smears around as opposed to getting rid of them. Hump!
  8. Got the living room and hall carpeting vacuumed with the Dyson and did just outside the door too… Huh! The dirt box filled up in seconds.
  9. Emptying the dirt box out into the bin lined waste bin and missed it! Grrr!

Felt so knackered then, I gave up trying to do any more housework and seasoned a tin of tomatoes then into the saucepan, to have with the remaining cooked belly pork later.

Got the laptop on to update this as the back pains got worse.

Also, I had failed to assuage or mitigate the guilt of losing the alarm wristlet, as I didn’t finish doing all of the windows in the living room, missed off two of the inside ones. How did I miss these? Incompetency? Stupidity? Banality? Or sheer deterioration of bodily and mental functions?

Did another pointless search for the alarm wristlet.

Weary, drained and depressed, I had the quick and easy meal of tomatoes and the remainder of the pork.

Despite my feelings of remorse and lack of confidence, I really enjoyed this.

I thought that Sister Janet and Pete would have enjoyed the belly pork. Wondered if I could take some for them to enjoy. They are very busy, though, and I’m in the same pickle. The pot of mandarins in jelly to follow was low-calorie, but not very nice. A bit bland.

Watched some of the old Hustle episodes from a DVD, and managed to enjoy them for the short time I managed to stay awake. Hehe!

Inchcock Today Tue 10 May 2016: Flat bound again!

Tuesday 10th May 2016

Slept better last night and woke up feeling the knees were so much better stiffness wise.

I assumed this would have been through using the new second-hand recliner I purchased yesterday from the bloke in flat 48 at Winchester Court? The pressure on the back of the knees was without doubt far less, and this cheered me up no end.

I nimbly (For me like) got up and to the bathroom.

Oh dear, the knees felt so much easier, but Arthur Itis had decided that today would be an imitation of Charlie Chaplin day for me. Hehe!

Haem Aroids was bleeding away and sore and Little Inchy was joining in too! And, the passing on the throne was really painful. But I was still elated at the knees feeling so… well, good, that I didn’t mind at all!

I prepared the vegetables and seasoned them in the Crock-pot slow cooker. Just turnip, onions and carrots this time.

Got them slow-slow cooking.

Next, I made a cuppa and took the medications as I started the laptop to finish off the Monday post.

Made a start on this one, doing the photographic touch-ups needed.

I remembered that Steve Age UK said he would call today to try and finish off the cancelling of Standing Orders for the old house.

I wondered why I’d written, ‘Stay-in’ on my paper diary for today.

We’ll see.

Facebook let me post again today. So I got caught up with the TFZer site, checked the emails and sent a photo of the new chair to Sister Jane and Pete.

I’ll have to stay in today, for when Steve Age UK arrives, but the wet drizzle outside is not encouraging to venture far anyway.

I rang Sister Jane to see how she was going. She seemed in good spirits. Some mail was delivered: One for previous tenant Magaret, three of bumph and one from the Cancer Treatment Centre. I’m going to have weekly checks before the cutting out session they have arranged for Tuesday, August 16th at 1515 > 1645hrs. They are to inform me of the day and times in a few days.

The rain is persisting still, not heavy mind, sometimes just spotting.

I did a graphic of my friend Lynton Cox and posted it on Facebook as a caption competition.

No sign or message from Steve Age UK yet.

I am surprised.

Had to turn off the Crock-Pot or the stew come casserole would have been too well done. Didn’t want to start to eat it and Steve Arrive and for it be wasted.

Steve did not arrive. Obviously, I’d got the day wrong – but with him not giving me his new phone number or email, I could not get in touch with him to find out the correct ay and time of his visit.

A tad dejected I got the vegetable stew served up and ate it with some Irish Batch bread.

Tried to watch some TV, but kept nodding off so got my head down with relative ease tonight.

Inchcock Today Wed 11 May 2016: Malapropism ridden day

Wednesday 11th May 2016

Kept waking during the night, unwilling to get up and that’s not me usually. Eventually around 0515 hrs, I lowered the chair (Thought I’d mention my new second-hand recliner again) and visited the porcelain throne. Performing the required motions was so painful again this morning, yet no bleeding from Haem Aroids or Little Inchy?

Made a brew and took an Entrolax pill with the usual medications, got the laptop on and finished the Tuesday diary. Somehow, I could not find the photograph of last night’s fodder, the vegetable stew in the camera? Mmm!

Did the graphics for today’s headers.

Started this page off and had a quick blast on Facebook to see if it would let me like! It did, hurrah!

Got the ablutions seen to and ready for a trip into town.

A decent conglomeration of tenants at the bus stop this morning. But I was the only one who got on the City bound L9 bus… either that or my lavender soap isn’t making it.

Hehe!

The rain started again on the way, and when I arrived it the city I nipped onto the pound shop to get an umbrella, cause I forgot to put mine in the bag, Tsk! But they had sold out with the downpours of recent days.

I had planned to take some photographs of certain areas of Nottingham to compare with the same shots years ago. But being as I’d left the notes of the areas in y dressing gown pocket and could not remember, apart from one, which areas I was going to photographicalise, I didn’t like. Humph again! I’ll post this one above on the Nottingham Now & Then site on Facebook later. (He say’s confident that he’ll remember to… Mmm) I cut down the new photo to try and match the ratio with the old one from… I don’t know when?

The Nottingham Pavement Cyclist were out in number again today. Bought the Nottingham Post.

Couldn’t risk taking too many photographs due to the heavy rain like, if yer know worra mean?

And me without a brolly too!

I had a waddle around and called in the pound Shop, where I bought some bits, well,  a lot of bits.

Nibbles for the tenant hour tomorrow, notepads, pens and treated me to a 20×2 biscuits pack of the caramelised biscuits, very nice they are too, especially at £1 a pack!

Great with a nice strong cup of jolly old tea yer know.

Made my way to the L9 bus stop, slipping some seeds to the pigeons en route.

The rain came a bit heavier then.

The folk who got on the bus all seemed a little miffed and unhappy, the weather I supposed.

I wish I’d taken the photographicalisation I did through the bus window a few seconds later. Then I might have caught a shot of the poor lad rushing over the crossing as her umbrella blew inside out.

As I passed the end of Clumber Street the rain had reduced the usual numbers of folks gadding about.

Mind you, they still need their coffee don’t they?

The journey back to the Woodthorpe Court flats was strangely bereft of gossip and laughter?

As the bus pulled up at the flats, I realised I’d forgotten to go and pick up the prescriptions. Well, fancy that me, forgetting something! I can call tomorrow if I go early enough because I think maybe Steve Age UK councillor might be calling about sorting the bank stuff out. Then again? Oh, no: The Morrisons delivery is coming then the Social Hour… oh dear!

Got the bits away, WC’d and got the laptop on graphicalisationing, Facebooked a bit, then got this updated and did the Newspaper funny post.

Nice meal apart from the Asda (Walmart) BBQ sausages, they were a bit of a let down tastewise.

Terrible!

Still, rated it at 8.2/10 for the rest of it like.

The potato cakes were grand.

The new second-hand Recliner began slipping just a bit as I was sat in it? Jerking perhaps a better word? Humph!

Inchcock Today Sun 8 May 2016: Flat-Bound and had a deep-thought… Oh yes!

Sunday 8 May 2016

I stirred into mock-life late again (For me like) this morning at 0525hrs.

A bit concernedly, there was no call to porcelain throne again, I thought that problem was sorting itself out, but no. Hehe! Still, the waterworks were working well enough if not too well today.

Hobbled into the kitchen to made a cuppa and take the medications and as I perused the landscape outside, saw through the light mist that a Pedestrian Footpath Cyclist had, I assumed fallen asleep on the bench, his bicycle on the floor nearby.

Odd hour for them to be about, no one else was.

I’ll have another look in a bit see if the ‘Swine’ is alright like.

Laptop on and finished Sunday post… no Saturday post. Then got on with doing more of the graphics I intend to use later, in fact, spent many hours, and still I haven’t gotten them like I wanted them to be.

Back into the kitchen to make another cup of tea, and to my surprise the bloke was still there on the bench, he’d moved position though from earlier on.

Whoopsiedangleplop number one then:

I took the tea into the living room and somehow managed, without almost any effort, to drop it on the new carpet!

I swore a little. Then tried to clean it up and ended up with the back giving me no end of gip in thanks now. Huh!

After another hour or so on the laptop, (still can’t get it right) I remembered the bloke on the bench and went to check again on him.

Two girls of the female species tried to rouse him without any luck, they were soon off.

Maybe he stank of drugs or booze perhaps?

I got some chips in the oven and peas warming in the saucepan, to have with the Krakowska cooked meat.

By gum the time had shot by this morning, well it’s well into the afternoon now.

I had a final glance out of the window and the chap had gone.

Got the fodder ready and watched a DVD while I consumed it.

Seasoned chips, Krakowska pork, beetroots, and demerara sweetened garden peas, followed by a lemon dessert.

Excellent! Rated this on at 9.2/10

I felt the day had been affected by my inefficacious efforts to understand life. (By gum, that was a deep thought for me!)

Once more, sleep did not come easily, even though I felt tired enough to? Sessions of falling off for a few seconds were rampant.

Still, there were two films on that I watched with a few nod-offs causing me to miss bit important parts of the films. Tsk!

I had a thought and wrote it down on one of my many waking periods;

“I seek Sanity and Peace, but no one has this, so I’ll stop looking!” Hehe!

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