It’s Been a Funny Old Life Part 1 – Prosed pathetically by Inchcock

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I was born in late August nineteen fourty-eight,

The midwife handed me to Mam, for us to interrelate,

Mam wasn’t to happy, she was in a right two-and-eight,

Her fag ash dropped on me, as she did state,

Something the midwife to me did later relate.

I don’t want it, throw it in the Trent!”,

If I keep it, I’ll not afford the rent!

Later she said my birth was an accident,

And I was not exactly heaven sent,

She lyingly said she ‘took’ to me later to her amazement.

She left home when I was three, leaving me and Dad,

I can’t claim this made me really sad,

She left leaving debts, that made Dad not glad,

Her leaving home became a bit of a fad,

The longest spell was four years, I wasn’t mad,

Mad and sad when she returned I was, poor lad!

At school, a rough one I was bullied and quite thick,

Did the shopping and cleaning, no time to get sick,

When Mam returned, I’d be cut to the quick,

She’d moan and argue giving us some verbal stick,

Another crime, and she’d do another disappearing trick.

She returned when I started earning ready cash,

She dipped into me pockets, leaving me abash,

Nowhere was safe to hide me stash,

She flogged off me LPs, that made me teeth gnash,

At conning folk Mother had no match!

The last time she absconded and ran away,

She was on the Police’s wanted list that day,

Leaving a trail of victims every which way,

Will they ever catch her people would say,

Reports came in she was in San Francisco Bay?

Or Mablethorpe, Lincoln, France or Torbay?

For many months she eluded police, kept em at bay,

Eventually she had her day in court after much delay,

My Sister well remembers that infamous day!

The court packed with character referers would you believe?

Mother falsly crying upon her shoplifted sleeve,

They read out the charges, it was hard to concieve,

One hundred and nineteen, twas hard to preconceive,

A tangle web of conning and stealing they did weave.

The man who read out the charge got fatigued after a while,

The Magistrates even raised a sneaky smile,

Court spectators nodded-off for a while,

She charmed the officials in her own conning style,

It took several days to complete the trial.

Found guilty, what did the Mother suckered Magistrates give?

They gave her a furnished rent paid flat in which to live,

Increased Benefits to help her pay the fine, very allevative!

This suited Mother, her being so aquisitive…

More to follow…

Thu 4.6.2015: Inchcock Today – Medications Whoopsiedangleplops

Thursday 4th June 2015

Woke after two hours kip at about 0500hrs.

Laid there and felt the new pains in me left rear rump and the angina giving me gip. This made me remember I need to sort out/refill me dosage pots.

Had a wash shave and deodorising session, then went down and made a cuppa.

Which to do first I thought, the shredding, the medications or the bins?

I began to sort the medication tubs out – then realised I had not got enough medications to fill them… oh dear, had I forgot to collect them or had I lost them? Couldn’t remember. Had a good search but found none. I’ll go when the chemist opens to find out and hope there are some for collecting, because I’m almost out of Warfarin and Beta-blockers – as I said earlier, oh dear!  

I started the laptop and this diary off and did the header with Coreldraw x7 not crashing yet.

Facebooked a while.

Made another cuppa and did some shredding while I waited for the chemist to be open and call on them.

Set off on a walk to the Chemists next to the launderette on MAnsfield Road

The wind had gone and the sunshine was out – worried it might bring out the local yobbery later.

Got to the pharmacy and e medications were waiting to be collected. (Glad about that).

Called in the launderette and had a natter with Mandy.

Then bravely back to Lidl again.

Bought soe baking potatoes, one tomatoe (Dutch) Lemon cheesecakes, bacon misshapes, tea bags and an Indian Aloo Saag – why I got the Aloo thing I’mm not sure. It must have been the picture on the box that looked nice?

The biggest ingedients are Onion, water, tomato, potato sunflower oill milk and spinach in tht order. It had cumin ginger and fenugreek in it – not sure if that indicates it might be a little hot for me tastes? Still, too late now. I suppose them advertising it as reduced from £1.99 to £1 might have tempted me too.

Got back to the bomb-site.

Put me bits away. away and made-up me new pots of medications. Had a whoopsiedangleplop as I did… I dropped the wrong medication into the pots of morning medications ad had to changed the with the midday ones and got myself into a muddle with them – but sorted it with a bit of bad language and patience. Hehe!

I thought with the IVR levels fluctuating so, I might not have enough Warfarin to get me through until next time.

So I had a poddle to the GP surgery to put in a request for extra Warfarin tablets.

The sun was even warmer now, and the local sum-bags were beginning to appear out on the streets.

I walked back to the dumo by the long route where there are not so many hide holes for them to lurk in.

As I got back I thought the sky had a certain picturesque quality in it, so I took a photograph of it.

Fed the pigeons en-route.

Got to the flea-pit and made a cuppa. Cleaned up me bleeding Inch, and then started the laptop/notebook to do some of this diary to date like.

Did a bit of sorting out and shredding until the ‘Dizzies’ came on, I hate these.

I’ll make some nosh early and get me head down, not feeling too good suddenly.

Hope to be back later. TTFN all.

Well, failed to get me head down again, but did some reading, even that failed to let me nod-off. Tsk!

Did some Facebooking, when it let me, had to open it three times before it loaded?

WordPressed fer a bit then finished this diary off like.

Hope to be back in the morning.

Wed 3 June 2015: Inchcock Today: Shredded!

Wednesday 3rd June 2015 

Woke determined to get a load more shredding done – and, get some stuff sorted and taken to Nottingham Hospice Charity shop, at least the wind seems to have dropped a bit at last.

Up around 0600hrs, WC’d, took me medications with a cuppa and straight onto the laptop to get this diary started.

Did a bit of shredding first – blimey it takes ages and makes such a mess… a bit like me really. Hehe!

This new Coreldraw x7 is taking some getting used to. The old keyboard aligning don’t work and I have to go through a docker to do it now?

Back onto the shredding for an hour or so.

Then got the things collated and bagged for the Nottingham Hospice Charity shop and set of on a walk into Sherwood to deliver them.

Oh dear, the sun has broken through and the winds have started blowing again! Huh!

Had a wash and scrub up and readied the things for the hospice shop.

Set off feeding the pigeons on the corner as I proceeded on me hobble into Sherwood.

The sky looked a bit brighter, and the winds were not so bad as they have been.

As I got to the top of the first hill, a enormous tricycle passed me on the pavement – it were big and wide and I think it had an electric engine as it belted passed me – I got me camera out and it was gone?

Was I cracking up or what?

Steadily down the hill and up the next, crossed over the road and up to the Nottingham Hospice Charity shop. Where there was only one elderly lady on her own bless her cotton socks. We managed a little natter and I made me way back to Carrington on the opposite pavement I used to get into Sherwood.

I called into the Continental Food shop and got a small polish loaf.

Just over the hill and a Nottingham Pavement Cyclist took an interest in taking a photograph… Hehehe!

I pressed  and down to the Lidl store to see if they had any nice tomatoes in stock to have later with me planned bacon sandwiches.

The didn’t, they only had the bitter Spanish ones.

I did notice as I poddled around the store – they had a DVD of Expendables 3 at £4.99 so treated missen.

I noticed they had on sale some pulled pork in different sauces in the fridge. Hickory BBQ sauce, Bourbon BBQ sauce and Sweet apple sauce.

But they were expensive compared to those on sale at Fulton and Heron food stores, also they were smaller packs as well.

Got some ice lollies, relish, tin of chopped tomatoes and herbs, brown sugar and sliced potatoes as well.

Got to the checkout and when she charged me £14.99 I thought ‘Hello…’ Looked at the receipt to find she’d charged me twice for the DVD!

Being overcharged seems to happen far too often at Lidl. Along with the sneers and indifference of many of the staff I find it a shame that some other company doesn’t open a store nearby in opposition to these German fiddlers. Perhaps an Aldi, then we can surrender to the Hun fiddlers? Hehehe!

I eventually found a member of staff to tell about this, and the natural unconcerned way she just said “Yes, she’s charged you twice that’s all!” What? was a little hard to fathom. I guess this happens all the time there.

Hey-ho!

Staggered back to the decaying residence, WC’d and got me bacon and bread ready. I put some caramelised red onion relish on the bacon before cooking in microwave and made three sandwiches to nibble for nosh.

Got me things ready for shredding again in the morning.

Had me nosh while watching a Star Trek Next Generation film on DVD – but fell asleep part-way through, so did this diary instead.

The nosh was not bad at all.

Cooking the bacon in the microwave reveals no fat coming out of it at all, but a clear liquid that sticks to the side of the microwave dish and should not be wasted – but golly it’s tasty when you scrape it off with the crispy crust of yer Polish bread.

Bad trying to get to sleep tonight, the body said sleep but the mind said no!

Well gone midnight and still no kip… yet I feel so tired. Tsk!

Tue 2.6.2015: Inchcock Today – Very Windy, Withering day of Wistfulness

Tuesday 2nd June 2015

Woke about 0550hrs recalling a bit of me dreams:

Something about being thrown out of a helicopter and landing in a massive swimming pool filled with rice pudding in a field with hundreds of booing spectators all dressed up like General De Gaul around the edges of the pool?

Painful visit to the porcelain. Thought about the days demands while suffering. The GP surgery nurse for INR Warfarin tests at 1030hrs, and arrange CHA Health check appointment – Visit the Council flats near Winchester Street – Clinic visit – and possible trip to try and get some Microwave sausages? – Shredding to get some done at leasts. Oh, and try to get things sorted and taken for the Nottingham Hospice Charity shop.

Still dark and drizzly this morning as I fed the pigeons.

Realised it is ten days to me skin cancer cut-outs session.

Took me medications with a good strong cuppa.

Mixed me curried beans ingredients and left them marinating to have later.

Put the water heater on for me bath before I go to GP surgery.

No launderette again today, I’ll try to get it in tomorrow.

Started this diary off and made the header on Coreldraw X7, which has now started crashing just like all the other versions I’ve had… Huh!

Did some shredding, then got missen polished for the trip to the GP surgery.

BJ rang as I was about to go out – he kindly said he’d pick me up after and take me to see the Winchester flat complex. He asked if I needed anything from his trip to Asda, and I asked him to get me two bottles of bleach. We agreed I’d call him after coming out of the doctors.

I set off on me poddle to the Sherringham Medical Practice surgery on Mansfield Road.

By gum it were windy this morning again.

The trees had all lost some branches and were a-blowing in the wind.

Got to the GP’s and remembered to book me CDH health check (Tue 23rd June @ 0900hrs).

The nurse called me straight in and took me blood sample for the INR test, and kindly listened to me moaning about me housing problems bless her.

She thinks the bleeding on me ankles might be where I was bitten last week on me walk in the country with brother-in-law Pete.

 I left the doctors and phoned BJ – he’s had some bad news about a death of someone he knew and I felt a bit bad bothering him. He asked where I was and I said “Walking up Mansfield Road on my way to your house, should be there in ten minutes or so”.

I made me way slowly to his house, and saw there was no car outside, so I waited in the wild wind for his arrival back from Asda.

After ten minutes BJ rang and asked where I was, I said “Outside your house mate.” He said he’s be there shortly.

Ten minutes later I rang him, and he was at my house – bit of confusion there in communications Tsk!

An irate BJ arrived and took his shopping into this house and lifted me to the Council Aided flats up Winchester Street.

We eventually found the Nottingham City Homes delegates and one of them took us round the first block of two near each other flats to have a look at the ‘single ones free’, there were several apparently.

Boy were they in a bad state! They all needed decorating, walls re-plastering electrics checking, door frame edges plastering redoing, and the smells that lingered… some unidentified ones and alcohol, tobacco and BO were present. Maybe that is why the rents were cheaper than elsewhere? The tiny lifts I’m sure would not take a bed or wardrobe in them, they shook too. The windows evidently were turnable for cleaning, I tried it and could not get them to turn enough so I could reach to clean them. Hey-ho… but the views from the top floors were great. I could hear noises from a neighbouring flat – the worst type for me, muffled and I did not know what was causing them or the exact origin of them. Not good.

I didn’t expect too much when I visited, but was taken aback by the damage and decorating that would need to be done if I did bid successfully for one of these flats.

A little dejected, BJ ran me to Mansfield Road so I could catch a bus to the Clinic. I thanked him and gave him some nibbles in appreciation.

I was soon seen to at the G.U.M. clinic, and told to keep on with the Clotrimazole cream.

I was out in half an hour and caught a number 17 bus on Hucknall Road into Bulwell.

I dropped off short of the centre and went into Tesco. Where I purchased a pot of Bay Leaves, tin of Baked beans, tin of garden peas and some milk.

Out of Tesco and a little walk into Bulwell and the Market Place.

So many pavement cyclists about i didn’t even think of photographing them.

As I wobbled down the pedestrian area to go to Fultons Foods store, I espied in a jewellery/Pawnbrokers store some watches for today’s TFZers ‘Bling’.

Some were incredibly cheap – perhaps too cheap?

But I liked the oval shaped one in particular, good clear non-fussy printing on it.

I popped in Fulton shop and had a look around, but no blackcurrant & vanilla ice-cream lollies or microwave sausages to be had Huh! – However, they did have some thick-cut Bacon Misshapes in the fridge, so I got a pack to treat myself and try and cheer up, because I was little down after seeing the state and smells of the flats earlier.

As I came out of the store I tried to split the things between me two bags – and the wind took one off me bags down the street at great speed – luckily a young chap chased after and retrieved it for me – restored my faith a tad that did. I thanked him profusely.

The Market stall-holder were having a battle with the wind too.

I made me way to B&M to see if they had any of the Irish Curried beans or jars of their sweet beetroots in stock – they didn’t.

I caught the bus back to Carrington, taking a photo through the window of the sky that had brightened a tad – but you could see the clouds belting across the horizon still.

Damnable wind nearly had me over when I got off the bus at the top of the hill on Hucknall Road in Carrington.

All down the street the trees had braches broken off or damaged.

Fed the pigeons.

WC’d (No blood) made a cuppa and put me bits away.

Started this diary off.

Then got me nosh ready.

Two thick bacon misshapes, mixed leaves, bread thins, an apple and my second attempt at home-made Curried beans. Today I added some caramelised red onion relish on top of the bacon steaks… I hope to return later to report on what it was like…

Later: Even better than the first effort – I’m proud as Punch! (Swagger, shakes head and trips over the shredding machine – Tut!). All I did different to the first one was add a bay leaf.

Nodded off eventually. Sprang awake half an hour later, not knowing why?

Mon 1st June 2015: Inchcock Today

Monday 1st June 2015 

Sorry about the misleading header – I intended to get some stuff to the Nottingham Hospice Charity shop, but the weather prevented me… Tsk!

Up at 0500hrs – WC’d, and straight onto the laptop… er, notebook to get me posts done for the League of Mental Men site.

Brooches from a Jewellers in Bulwell. Is the ‘S’ one a dollar sign maybe, perhaps?

First time I’ve done it on the new notebook – took me hours and hours to get right.

Cuppa and took me medications around 0700hrs then carried in with the posts.

Did a bit of Facebooking.

Got some stuff ready for the Nottingham Hospice shop and had a walk into Sherwood with as the rain is looking less likely now.

Over half the day gone now, blimey.

Up and got missen cleaned and brushed up.

Came down to get me new razor from me shpping bag that I’d forgot to take up earlier in the week and…

Amazing how the wheather can change while yer having a wash innit?

Photo taken from me front door.

So, no going out after all. Although it ain’t started raining yet, odds are it will do soon – especially if I got out – now I’ve said that it wont rain I suppose.

Got a letter from the Doctors Surgery this afternoon. I’ve got to book an appointment for the CHD Health Checks with the Surgery Nurse. Being as (If I remember) I’ve got an appointment in the morning with her to have me INR Warfarin level tests done, I’ll do it then.

Feeling a bit peckish now, I’ll get me nosh ready methinks.

Well I enjoyed that folks.

Felt a bit… no very guilty for a having a stay-in do little day.

Took me medications and did this diary to the tune of many emergency vehicle klaxon’s and sirens outside.

Hell of job getting off to sleep Huh!

31.5.15: Inchcock Today: Raining, drab and depressed

Sunday 31st May 2015

Oh dear what a view this morning!

Woke remembering bits of some dreams I’d had:

I was on a gigantic treadmill going towards some high-rise flats, and people kept pulling me off the machine, I managed several times to fight them off and get back on the escalator, but each time they would drag me off again? The Duke of Edinburgh appeared out of some trees with several MI5 looking wallahs and shot me in me left kneecap with his hunting rifle… He laughed, well guffawed. I tried to get back on the escalator but someone had covered it with cooking oil, for some reason I knew it was Mazola cooking oil and wanted to know why they had not used ‘Trex’ cooking fat?… Found myself in an animal sanctuary of some sort trying to get a nail out of a mallard duck when the gate opened and in came the Duke of Edinburgh, in a kilt this time and shot me again…?

Family breakfast!

WC’d, a little blood from the haemorrhoids, and the blind boil was painful!

Made a cuppa and started the laptop and made me header for this blog.

Checked me emails. While doing this I noticed how dark dank and wet it was outside – then the pigeons came down for their breakfast.

Dark, dank, wet and windy – Tsk!

As I opened the door the sight was dismal – the rain was falling the winds blowing hard and it was dark and dank!

I checked on Facebook for a bit, then started on shredding me documents for a couple of hours.

I received an email from Patti Bekert for making curried beans.

So I hope to get all the ingredients from Tesco in town and try it out today.

Upstairs and spruced myself up and set off to town, no walking today with this rain.

Got as far as he church, and it dawned on me I’d got me reading glasses on when I looked at the trees.

So, back to the hoppit and changed into me other goggles.

Arrived in town and straight to Tesco, who I discovered didn’t open until 1100 am Sundays.

So I had a walk though the shopping centre getting a photo of some ‘Bling’ en route for the TFZ gals.

Pricey stuff this time.

I had a look in the shop windows and at the peoples faces in the centre – they did not look happy, well most of them didn’t look happy.

The fresh fruit drink stall had three assistants but no customers yet.

I left the centre and was greeted by the usual sight of the Nottinghamians crossing the lights against the pedestrian red lights as is normal for them.

Not many folk around yet, but this soon changed later.

The drizzle continued.

I wandered around and called in the Primark store to see if they had any zip-up cardigans in.

They didn’t – summer you see?

However, they were selling some headphones at £6 – large ear pieces on them, but at this price I was tempted and bought a set, as the old ones I used on the laptop had stopped working (As the previous four I had used had also conked out?)

I got back to Tesco and wandered around in search of the ingredients that Patti had emailed me to make me curried beans. I managed to get: Two tins own label baked beans @ 24p each, Worcester sauce @ £1.19, Bacon crumbles @ £1.69, a tiny bag of unrefined Fair Trade brown sugar @ £1-79 (Expensive I thought), Cheapo bag of Sultanas @ 84p and onion crispies at £1.39 (Didn’t like that, I can get them from B&M stores for 69p – but needs must I just had to try making me curried beans today).

I wandered out and over through Trinity Square to the bus stop and caught one back to Carrington.

I dropped off a stop early and called in Lidl to get some bread.

They had some mini vegetable pizzas in the bakery section that looked delicious at 59p each so I got one, along with a cob and some South African apples.

As to why I got that pizza I’n a little confused myself – I don’t like pizzas?But these just looked so nice?

Got back to the flea-pit and got me ingredients ready.

I added some black pepper I already had and mixed the mixture into the beans in a microwave pot and left them to enthuse… is that the right word?, so that the taste should come through when I make em later.

I stored them all (Not the apples) in box together so I didn’t forget which ones to use next time in the event that I get it right this first time like. (I think).

Laptop on and started this dairy.

Tried to get on Facebook, but it wouldn’t load?

Did some sorting and tried again – aha… Facebook back on now. Tsk!

The wind is getting bad here now.

Gerry’s First Home Made Curried Beans!

I must offer my thanks to Patti (Bekert) for her recipe for these beans, I was so pleased with how they came out and tasted.

Thanks Patti pet, absolutely and definitely unquestionably, absolutely lip-licking Wunderbar!

Watched a DVD while noshing, fell asleep, woke up and got this diary finished.

Evening all!

Sat 30.5.15: Inchcock Today –

Saturday 30th May 2015 

Up at 0400hrs – due to falling asleep so soon last night because I was so well shattered.

Cuppa and took me medications.

Spent far too long on the laptop/notebook! Tried to find out how to set the export function to default RGB 24 bit, as the 32 bit colours come out differently on screen when posted – Huh! I still have to do it manually for each graphic.

I searched the web to try and find out how to do it but found nowt to help me.

Then I had a go at searching the Windows 8 helpline thingy to change the screen from high to medium viewing. Like a shot I found in an hour later.

Getting on by then, so to appease the guilt a little I did some shredding of me old documents.

Spur of the moment thing, I decided to go to Bulwell in the vain hope of getting some Curried Beans and or Microwave Sausages.

The sky brightened up while I was at the bus-stop. The little speck in the centre of the picture is the police helicopter.

Caught the number 17 into Bulwell.

As I got off the bus a fight was taking place near the Taxi/Cab place, so I walked the other way to avoid any hassle to the Market Place.

Many pavement cyclist (too many to even think of photographing).

Mobility scooter haven Bulwell is as we.

Went to the cheapo shop, but they had no Curried Beans or Microwave sausages in.

Called in Heron Foods shop – but they had no Curried Beans or Microwave sausages in.

Went to the Iceland store – but they had no Curried Beans or Microwave sausages in.

Then finally into Fultons Foods – but they had no Curried Beans or Microwave sausages in either.

However they did have some Torunska sausage and Blackcurrant and vanilla ice cream lollies, so I got some.

As I came out of the store I noticed the kiddies ride outside the shop was doing a roaring trade – and they were selling (Or trying to sell) Candy-Floss at £1.50 each!) Bit pricey that I thought?

The only ankle-snapper on the Tea-cup ride seemed utterley disinterested to say the least.

I hastened (Well hobbled as fast as I could manage) to the bus-station so me Iced lollies didn’t melt before I got em in the fridge – but couldn’t resist taking a photo of some beautiful rings I noticed in the jewellers store window, for the TFZ gals.

Limped on and joined the queue for the bus, just missed one so had to wait a good while. Tsk!

Glad I remembered to take me book with me to read on the bus like. It’s stories and tales from the soldiers who were there at Dunkirk.

Soon back in Carrington and taking the long route to the dump, as a ganglet of youths were loitering at my end of the street.

Got in and no demand for the porcelain presented itself? Odd that.

Felt peckish earlier today – so decided to make baked potatoes and beef curry. Bit adventurous fer me I know.

Flippinng heck it hot! Too hot for me I’m afraid, I thought with it saying it was Chinese style it would me mild – Tsk!

Two hours later and me mouth and throat are still hot!

Oh dear, I just belched – cor blimey!

Fri 29.5.15: Inchcock Today – Out and About Photographicalisationing in the Rain. The fool!

Friday 29th May 2015

Woke remembering bits of some dreams… chasing people but never getting close to them, down streets, over rooftops and in sewers and caves?

Came down and made a cuppa, fed the pigeons.

Made sure my neighbours and my bins were pulled out for the Refuse Administrator Facilitators (Formerly Bin-men before the European Human Rights shower got involved) arrival later. (0545hrs)

A bit damp this morning, the sun forcing it’s way through though. It went back in as I wrote this.

Took me medications.

The space in the corner of the room, now free of Nottingham Hospice Charity shop donations and rubbish bags took some getting used to. Hehehe!

It’ll soon get filled again once I get me wind and find time to do some more sorting.

Not up to it at the moment, the stomach is churning again – a feeling of comfortableness and expectancy lingers about this – please not the runs again… Please!

Updated me diary with dates of Dentist, Skin-cancer, INR Warfarin level test and Clinic appointments.

At last, a heavy-duty call to the porcelain. Regrettably the anticipated runs turned out the opposite and blood flowed.

Cleaned myself up, made another cuppa and returned to the laptop.

Used Coreldraw X7 to make the header for this post.

Bin men called, pulled bins back off the road afterwards.

Went up to have an abluting session and shave. Bit of a shock when I looked in the mirror – Gawd I look pale, almost ghostly!

Got me things, bus-pass, Pound-shop umbrella (Raining heavy now) nibbles and small shopping list: Curried beans and cooked pork only on it.

I thought twice about going out when I opened the door and saw the rain belting down. Huh!

Got me Pound shop umbrella, bus-pass, nibbles and shopping list only curried beans and cooked pork joint on it – no Heinz curried beans left in Nottingham, Derby or Mansfield! Tsk!

On me walk into town I was weary of the gigantic puddles in the gutters and tried to nip past them between cars to avoid getting soaked when they drive through them – but no, a flaming bus came as I was walking by a big un and soaked me through all down me right side.

I walked on and turned back taking a photo of the next bus to show how the first one got me! Swines!

No rush this morning, cause I couldn’t use me free pensioners bus-pass until 0930hrs so I poddled squelchingly along up the hill.

At the pelican crossing near the entrance to the Forest recreation ground the lights had taken a bashing from some vehicle or other.

I pressed on slowly over the hill and down into the City Centre.

Found myself a little early to use me bus-pass when I got to the Victoria bus-station, so I went in Vic Centre to see if I could find anyone selling curried beans – mission failed, I returned to the Vic bus-station and got on a Red Arrow bus to Derby.

As we stopped on upper Parliament Street I took a photograph through the front windows of the bus.

The rain continued to pelt down.

Despite the weather, that didn’t stop James Hunt the driver from getting us all to Derby in double quick time.

In Derby I went through the back of the bus-station to the river Derwent, the first site was of several poor weather battered pigeons on the posts at the river-side.

I walked back a bit and threw them some seeds and earth-worm sticks.

This attracted the mallards and Canadian geese to approach me demanding more!

It amazes me how great big geese like these can pick up and eat individual seeds from the floor?

I get an odd satisfaction from feeding these wild birds, don’t know why but I just seem to feel better for doing it?

(Made new header later in Coreldraw X7 using one of me photo’s of the pigeons I took in Derby)

I left the birds fighting for the food and walked down and over to the Eagle Centre market – thinking I might find some curried beans at the cheapo stall there.

When I got up to it I found an empty stall – they had closed down! Tsk!

So up and into the centre proper an got missen a pork joint.

Then to the Derby City Council offices and caught a bus to Mansfield.

By gum I value me free bus-pass!

The driver left the engine running, a bit roughly to me mind, and got out to have a fag.

We set off and the journey took about an hour to get to Mansfield.

The scenery along the country lanes was wonderful, even in the rain.

As the bus filled up the buggy-bays did too.

The kids seemed determined to destroy the seats and ring the bell throughout their journey.

The aisle between the seats came in handy for their chasing game as well. The driver knew better than question their antics and disturb the mothers on their mobile phones – sensible bloke!

We arrived at Mansfield Bus station and those left on the bus seemed in an inordinate rush to get off?

I thought there might have been an injury or two as they battled each other to get off the bus first?

Then they seemed to scatter to various exits and disappeared into the ether?

I trudged down the rain soaked under-pass and went to check out the B&M store and Pound Stretcher store in search of Heinz Curried Beans.

None to be had – I know Lynton Cox told me they had stopped making them like.

But if they stopped making em cause they weren’t selling, you’d think there would be some left to be had?

Huh!

I made me way back to the bus-station and caught a Pronto bus back to Nottingham.

The wind is getting up now as well as the constant rain.

The bus stopped at some road-works for ages and this gave me a chance to take a photo of the fields and sky.

I was well pleased with this one.

I’ve made a bit bigger when I put it in. For once it was just how the eye saw it too.

And no reflections either?

We joined a rather long queue as we approached some roadworks using stationery trafficking lights.

We were there for ages, not that it mattered to me like, as I happily failed to finish me crossword again.

As we passed the roadworks the mud splattered onto the windows and that was the end of any good photo taking through the bus window.

I did try to take a photo quickly of a horse on a hill as we sped passed, but didn’t come out well. Hey-ho!

I could claim I was trying to take an atmospheric photo?

But I wasn’t.

Dropped off the bus in Carrington and hobble back to the House of rubbish.

I put the kettle on and as I started the laptop… sorry… Notebook (Can someone tell me the difference please?) there was no fewer than three peoples having a delve into the rubbish skip across the road – I caught the last one on me camera.

This skip certainly has fascinated and attracted much interest of the locals.

Made me pork and beans nosh.

Not made so much today, I’m learning.

AM. Note: Soon nodded off then, well tired I was.

Thurs 28.5.15: Inchcock today – Hectic!

Thursday 28th May 2015 

Up at 0450hrs – down to make a cuppa.

I espied after taking this photograph the seagull lurking on the roof. After reading about the Chihuahua pecked to death by seagulls in Devon – I hope they don’t move into Nottingham. Here are some headlines about Seagull attacks in England.

From the BBC News site:

“A pensioner has died after being attacked by seagulls in his garden. As the terror of overprotective gulls returns all round the UK, people are asking what can be done about them.” 

From the Mail:

Nikki wayne, 57, had previously spotted he birds diving for her five-month-old Chihuahua Bella. The seagulls swooped and pecked the dog to death before she could get back inside. Read more: 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3070426/Chihuahua-owner-horrified-beloved-puppy-pecked-death-gang-angry-SEAGULLS.html#ixzz3bQ1R4S4A 

From the Guardian:

Small dogs have bled to death, children’s lips been sliced open, and an elderly man died of a heart attack following a particularly vicious assault in his back garden (3). News that the Royal Mail has temporarily halted deliveries to an otherwise peaceful Cornish cul-de-sac because of the danger should come as no big surprise; it’s happened before.

A diving herring gull is a missile: special attack talon on the heel, razor-sharp two-inch beak, 1.4-metre wingspan, more than a kilo of angry bird travelling at 65kph. No wonder there’s blood. And there are more and more of them, at least in built-up areas: Britain’s urban gull population – thriving on takeaway scraps, open-topped litter bins and landfill sites to scavenge from, and wide ledges and flat rooftops to nest on – is growing by 20% a year. Seagulls can live for up to 40 years, and their survival rate in cities is 95%.

From the London Standard: Pensioner killed by seagulls

http://www.standard.co.uk/news/pensioner-killed-by-seagulls-6327549.html

Neighbours told how former ambulance driver Wilfred Roby disturbed a nest of chicks as he tried to clean bird droppings from the roof of his garage in Anglesey, north Wales.

The parent birds, joined by other gulls, swooped on the 80-year-old, knocking him off the wall on which he was standing and on to the ground, where they continued to peck at him as he lay unconscious.

Worrying innit?

I went into the charms section on Windows and found how to find and open the clipping option – then spent a good while finding out how to exit from it (Exit from the new green windows on Windows 8, I tried so many things that when I did get back into the internet I’d forgotten how I did it! Huh!.

I noticed in the email from the Housing place a little spelling mistake or two in it – or was it with the ‘Looing’?

Was it an indication of the gentleman’s intentions to inform me that my bladder control would be examined? Hehehe! Not that I could move in there even if there was any vacancies with it not being assisted housing.

Today Steve from Age UK is coming at 1400hrs to see me to offer advice and discuss how I can advance in my clearing out and assisted living home search.

BJ called last night just after I’d nodded off to kip, to tell me he’s coming today to take some stuff for me to the Nottingham Hospice Charity shop bless him.

BJ looking distinguished in this photo of him at the Pumping Station.

Did some Facebooking and took me medications, passed wind and started me piles bleeding.

The flock of pigeons came down for their breakfast as I took some stuff out to the bin. 

I managed to download and install some fonts to the new laptop/notebook – I still don’t know the difference between them or why the old machine was called a laptop and this one is called a Notebook? This is one job that is actually easier in the new windows, once you’ve worked out how to do it of course.

Opened Coreldraw x7 and made the header for today’s dairy.

Popped up to use the porcelain and me rear end was bleeding… Fancy that!

 The pain from me Whoopsiedangleplop at the Lidl check-out yesterday afternoon is less than I thought it might have, but still stinging a bit. No idea if any bruises have appeared I imagine they must have. I’ll get BJ to have a look when he arrives, because I’m supposed to log any new bruising on me Warfarin record card.

BJ rang I missed it and rang him back – he’ll be here at 1100hrs. (Somehow with his timekeeping record I doubt this – but would be pleased to be proved wrong).

Went up and got missen cleansed and polished in readiness for the day ahead.

Down at 1050hrs awaiting BJ’s arrival.

1120hrs, Still awaiting BJ’s arrival.

1140hrs BJ arrived. Quick natter and we were off to the Nottingham Hospice Charity shop with the many bags of gear for them.

When we left I called into the dentists just up the road to confirm my next appointment.

When I came out of there I couldn’t find BJ, he was not in the car?

He appeared a few minutes later, he’s been to the greengrocers and scrounged two empty potato bags for me to use for me shredded paper bless him.

He ran me home and I picked up me Warfarin Record & dosage sheet and had a walk to the GP surgery and booked my next INR level tests for next Tuesday @ 1045hrs.

Then back to the flea-pit to await the arrival of Stephen from the Age UK group.

He arrived at the stated time and we had a chin-wag about the assisted flat hunting, and looked at some on the internet.

Favourites at the moment seems to to be Colville Court near the cemetery – handy that, it’ll save on expenses when I croak-out.

Steve is going to have a word with City Homes to see if he can get them to raise my standing from the the bottom one of Group 4 in the waiting list for Independent Living accommodation.

And he also said he will also contact Metropolitan Housing who own Colville Court to see if we can go take a look at them first before applying to go on the waiting list.

The area is all prostitutes and students BJ tells me… Mmmm?

Wonder how he knows? Hehehe!

Steve was very understanding of me problems with me health I must say, grand chap.

I thanked him and Steve departed.

I then set off for me bus-ride into the City Centre to try and get some curried beans.

At the end of the street, I turned, and went back to the dump, and  collected me bus-pass.

The bus was full of mobile-phoners and kids in prams.

Got off and went into Tesco and spent too much again, Sopocka, Marmite Crisps, Tesco brand curried beans (Not good, but fair like), err… cream cake, radishes and other bits.

Within minutes of leaving Tesco I nearly had a collision with two daft Pavement Cyclists who crossed, against the lights like the pedestrians, they nearly clobbered into me and some other folk… Tsk!

At the next crossing lights, the Nottingham Pedestrians confirmed their intention not to reform their habit of crossing the road against the Red Lights!

In fact this mother was actually dragging her daughter by the arm while pushing a baby in a push-chair with the other arm! Amazing or what?

I noted they were getting on with the new Victoria Shopping Centre (Mall) main entrance as I walked to the bus-stop to catch a bus home.

Feeling tired now, another hectic day for the Young Nottingham Lad eh?

I called in the Co-op when I dropped off the bus. The reason being that when I was doing me paper shredding I came across a Dividend Card statement and thought I could supply them with the number of the card and see if I could get any ‘Divi’ back?

At first the woman just said “You’ll have to phone our customer services people and ask them”. I explained about me frequent problems using the phone, pointing to me hearing aids as I said this. She kindly offered to ring them for me with me confirming who I was like. It turned out the statement I’d found was from 1989 – Oooer!

She said I’ve to fill in a form and send it off – then kindly said if she could have the statement she’d do it for me – I went all coy and thanked her.

Back to the dump, no WC visit yet.

Laptop on and loaded me photographs from the day to use on here later, then got me nosh ready.

It was nice, but it was far too much for me to eat, got carried away a bit methinks?

Baked potatoes with olive oil spread and caramelised red onion relish, beetroots (Ruddy hard beetroots), Danish blue cheese, radishes, tomatoes, Silesian sausages, mixed leaves and bread thins.

I’ve bringing wind up now!

I had me Fresh Cream French Horn later on.

I got the diary dine up to this point and fell a-kip!

I just nodded off and brother-in-law Pete rang to see how I was – and tell me that the skin cancer growth they taken from his shoulder was found to be malignant. They are going to take some more tests and remove a greater area. I said I’d go with him if I was not in hospital myself. He’s had bad luck there the lad has.

The chap only had one patch of skin cancer growth and it turns out to be malignant. Hope all goes well for him.

Made me wonder about the eight patches of growth I am going to have removed on June 12th.

Hey-ho!

Wed 27.5.15 Inchcock Today – Carrying on Regardless…

Wednesday 27th May 2015

Woke remembering bits of some dreams at 0610hrs.

I’d made notes during the night, but they were unreadable.

I recall being in a cellar with shop accoutrements and equipment all over the place, not unlike the cellar at the old Co-operative House on Parliament Street in Nottingham was in the 60’s.

The old wooden cash drawer from No3 store on Carlton Road I recognised, with its divisions and round wooden pots for the cash, it even had the old dividend pad we had to fill in for each customer sale.

Scattered around were bacon slicing machines of various types, rusty delivery bikes with their baskets corroded, boning knives, saws, white staff and grey managers coats, the old wooden tubs of 60lb of Danish butter were even there.

Old counters and wooden floorboards and in the middle, many of the people I knew form those days were sat apparently playing cards?

I’m sure there was much more in the dreams because the notes I made were large – even if as I say, unreadable.

Down and started lap and Woes! When I tried to load Google Chrome I was informed that changes to the internet supplier has caused problems? I had the choice of reloading or resetting all attachments?

I reloaded but nowt happened. Then I rebooted the modem – and phew… all came back on. I hope this doesn’t happen again – the very thought of losing me internet connection makes me suicidal and panic in fear of doing something wrong and losing it altogether.

I wondered if it was because I was using the old laptop last night?

I nipped up to the WC and noticed me can of shaving cream was on the stairs with blood on it?

Had I been sleep-walking? I checked missen over but could not find any bleeding – even the little Inch and haemorrhoids were clear of blood this morning – but why the shaving foam should have blood on it beats me?

I had a rinse and noticed blood on the toothbrush? Weird!

What the flipping heck had I been doing in me sleep? (Hehehe – had to laugh to myself though).

Finishing this diary update now, and I’m going to do some Facebooking then get the shredder set-up and clear some of the mountain of paperwork… I hope!

Hello, I’ve just looked a piccy I posted in yesterdays diary, and the bloodied shaving foam is in that??? I’m losing it here…

On with the paper shredding for two hours.

Filled up a small paper bag and giant box’s with the shredded documents, nowhere left to store them for now.

I decided I’d get me laundrette duties done today, and I can get some nosh in at the same time.

So I got myself spruced up, fed the pigeons and set of to the launderette.

Many was on duty today, but she was busy.

Got the machine going and nipped to Lidl to see what they had for me nosh.

I got some New Zealand apples, jacket potatoes Silesian sausages and two cheese rolls.

When I got to join the queue at the checkout…

The chap behind me in the line swung up a pack of 6 large cola bottles onto the conveyor and the pack split as he did, hitting me on the shoulder and sliding down clouting me hip then thigh and knee.

The skin cancer growth took the worst of the blow.Tsk!

Shook me up a bit but I soon came round.

The security guard disappeared and a couple of youths from the staff came and asked me “Are you alright” “Yes” I foolishly said. And they disappeared too.

The young man that hit me was full of apologies and offered to help me home with the food. One of those things really.

I limped back to the launderette ad got me washing in the drier.

Mandy said I looked pale, what’s happened? I told her, she said Why is always that these things happen to you? I said: I was thinking the same. Hehehe!

Steve from Age UK rang me, I missed the call and rang him back. He’s going to call and see me tomorrow at 1400hrs.

Packed up me finished washing and trudged home.

The shoulder painful and the hip a bit so.

Put me stuff away and updated this diary.

Got me nosh prepared. Last of the Polish belly pork, Silesian sausages, me last can of curried beans (Sob!) cheese cobs, tomatoes, baked potatoes and tomatoes.

Very filling, nice.

Took me medications as I got up to visit the porcelain the stiffening of me shoulder was painful. Bet I’ve got some bruises, but can’t see the area of me anatomy to check.

Did some Facebooking but felt so tired.

Finished off this diary.

Must remember Steve from a

Age UK is coming tomorrow… please let me remember!

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