Pathetic Parole Board Pansies! Overpaid, money-grabbing, HMG Pleasing Official Murderers! My hatred of these HMG-controlled, scum moneyites has no limit! Prejudiced, biased, inequity, greed! A complete & utter disregard for the victims and families of those raped, robbed, or murdered by the shits they have pathetically freed from prison. No shame or guilt! They are worse than criminals! – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
I slept a bit better last night once I got off. Rose removed the night bag and required the services of the Porcelain Throne. I could tell this was going to be an evacuation of a differing style from the last few day’s events. The rumbling innards could actually be felt, and I suspect, had I good hearing, would have been heard, as well! The repeated refilling of the WC tank is taking it out of me. Can you believe it? Constipation Konrad has been crushed by the return of Trotsky Terence! Three visits in an hour – no doubt more to come. – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
The sessions started very early. Each one was a slurpy, messy spitting-it-out job. Pebble-dashing the porcelain, my bum, and somehow it even sprayed the legs this time. On the rebound, mayhap? Hehehe! On the third one, the floor copped for a few sprinkles as well. It may have been in the morning, but it was a nightmare cleaning up and refilling the tank with buckets of water from the kitchen. I was about buggered by the third session! Now, I’d like to take the time to give some advice on ablutionalisationing in the shower. I genuine tip or two to help prevent what happened to me.
On the right is the object I head-butted when the carbolic soap shot from my fingers, and I bent down, holding onto the grab rail to retrieve it. You may be partially sighted as I am, but here’s a little tip. (I just washed mine as well; Little Inchie, Hahahah!) In the event that you followed my tip last year, here’s the thing to remember if you can: I mentioned keeping your good arm on the bar at full length – what I missed off last time was: Do not let the arm slip off of the grab bar – especially when you on the way down to retrieve your carbolic bar of soap. Just a tip, as contacting your forehead with the corner of the power box is likely to damage it; doesn’t do your forehead much good either.
I decided not to use the grey bucket for emptying the pouch in. From here on, until the toilet has been mended, I’ll keep it full of water in the bathroom to make it easier when I use the WC to start the refilling trudge from the kitchen to the wet room. Blown if it doesn’t look like rain coming on through the kitchenette window? A little glum view. Did the Vitals, and I made up the graph. Not a thought in my head about my having done both recordings in the morning, missing off the PM one. Sad! As I was putting the kettle on and dropping the tub of Glengettie teabags on the floor, as I gingerly rose up, the wind could be heard, even by me, and rain poured down. who called earlier after the second visit to the . It was he who fetched the medications and night bags for me; bless him. came later on. She said she was busy and didn’t stay long. As she was leaving chimed out, called, “Someone to see you”, and departed.
It was our local councillor, Dr Nayab Patel. Asking if I had any problems. She said in a manner and tone that told me immediately that she’s already asked many others and regretted it! Poor gal! I told her how I appreciated what the council provide. This pleased her. her fellow Councillor, who’d been in to see Josie at the same time, was ringing my door buzzer to rejoin her. Well, that went well, I thought.
The rain had stopped, and the blue sky with clouds appeared. An absolute total pareidolia’s delight! Do you see the open hand and fingers to the left of this cloud? Bootiful!
From the left window, I can see seashells in this cloud, whelk shells maybe? And some of the fingers that are overlapping from the right window picture? Also, there’s an animal head in there somewhere?
Oche bejesus, I forgot to put these on the right in. From the 20 minutes only of wind and rain falling! Top through the right window kitchen, second through the left one. The second from the left window. Then the bottom one through the bottom narrow window, really close-up to it. The rain spots came out looking decent?
Carer Carol-Ann, then Sam called… or, it may have been the other way around? The pouch emptying was done in a disposable pot so as to keep the water in the wee-wee bucket available for the non-working WC duties and refilling the water tank. Only been two more visits up to now. But I had to remember to keep an eye on the level. 200 max fit into the bowl.
Well, I do declare! – It looks like the leg geyser papules are trying to come back? Amusingly, again with or in a face shape? Not as funny as the first time. I might end up with a map of the moon? Or perhaps just one giant geyser papule? Hehehe!
Got some tomatoes and imitation bacon bits in the saucepan. Then I ferreted around in the freezer and found some vegan sausages, can’t read the date on the packet… , but I’m sure I will be okay. You can put that on my funeral plaque. “But he was sure he’d be okay” Hehe!
Get the nosh done next. There’s no doubt about it; this was not one of my best efforts at making a meal. I thought I’d added my usual extras and flavourings to the dish as well. The best I can grant for the Flavour Rating is 4.2/10. Shame! Maybe the sausages were out of date after all? The bread was nice, though.
Washed the dots… erm… pots and then actioned the activities. Which were messy; almost liquid again. But at least it was all over with one splattering of the porcelain. Then the task of fetching water from the kitchen to refill the water tank on the W.C. No problems with it this time. Cleaned up the wet room, then into the kitchenette to make sure things were alright, and boy, what a night view! Lovely it was!
I hobbled to get the camera and took these shots over the next ten minutes or so.
The bottom one reminded me of a sci-fi film with a visit from aliens meeting. Can’t recall the name, but it was good, and the dark cloud seems to rise from the ground made me think of the film. The one where the Americans were talking to the invaders with lights and sounds? I’ll have to look it up.Nope, can’t find it… Tsk! Minutes later, it looked like this on the right. This a perfect photograph and scene for any of the pareidolia lovers who might be reading this blog.
Took me a lot of effort and pain on the first ~Porcelain Throne visit. Rock solid again, followed by a second evacuation of almost liquid gooey content. My eyes were too bad to do the crossword while waiting.
As for the feeling ‘Out-Of-It’ scenario, things were better up to now.
But when the Computer Blue screen came up, the fretting and semi-panicking returned instantly.
This encouraged further worry over the non-arrival of the medications or catheter bags. And the mind wanderings were all about the current day problems with an expectancy of losing the computer at any time.
The better earlier concentration, although not good in itself, crumbled after the blue screen came on… Cragknangles! Not a lot on today.
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The overworked Catheter day bag’s urine colour was just fine.
Even the inserted into little Inchie tube didn’t seem so much bother?
However… The Vitals readings were probably the highest they have been for a while. The combined two, I mean. I Was surprised at the SYS and DIA being so high again. Ah, well!
Clouds cross this found as the sun rises from behind the Woodthorpe Cell Block… I meant Woodthorpe Court flats. Hahaha!
The battery in the camera needed changing. The battery in the wall clock (the one that fell off of the wall) was changed as well.
A mid morning pouch emptying was a shock. A lot of dark red in there this time.
Carer Josef, Carer Sam, and Carer Carol-Anne attended up to now. (17:00hrs)
Afternoon view while the sun had retreated for an hour or so.
She was back later on, though, and she persevered for a while. Hello, Little Inchie is bleeding. Back in a bit… All stopped and fine now. Thatyointments stings but is of no bother to me. Ahem! Great balls of fire! Well Feet!
The lumps and depressions! I’m glad to report that a little bit of pareidoliaing was done with this photo. Does it not look like a thumb growing on the heel of the one on the left to you? Hahaha!
Hello, the urine has gone back to a good colour again? There will be a reason for this.
If anyone knows, can you please let me know?
I’ve decided on thick vegetable soup[ for tonight’s meal. I’ll heat up one of the brown thingamabobs in the oven… I’ll get the name shortly, bread, long, thin-shaped… Oh! Baguette, that’s it! I aim to make it with plenty of gravy to soak up with the bread. I’ll add some seasonings, mayhap a little of the soya lumps too. Slurp!
Above is the dreaded blue screen that came up on the computer. Argh!
Decent nosh under the circumstances.
Those include being miffed and pissed off. Worried, in pain and suffering from lack of sleep.
Don’t know why I said that; it’s all everyday stuff for me.
I fear for most of the day today, I was here, but my mind was far away.I started that-many plans, jobs and needs, but maybe got 10% of them done. In fact, I lost the plots more often than I retained them. I went way off-track. Let things slip, failed to remember to do things, to think anything out. I lost consciousness in a way and awareness of activities and plots planned and needed.But, do you know, I fretted and got hot under the collar far less than usual! Right up until around 20:00hrs, and all the worries, fears, shame, self-hatred returned. It was like mental torture, and the Thought-Storms kicked off and stayed with me. I was aware of the problems all the same, but just didn’t care? If I could buy a drug to put me back into that mode, I would. It was like a new lease on life. I suppose/imagine that Dementia Doreen played a hand in this, but for once, I didn’t mind. A shame it came to an end, but unfortunately, it’s left me with memory blanks over the last eleven hours. I wonder if Cannabis might help me get that wonderful part-day relief from worry back? Hey-Ho! This is the best I can give you… – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
A terrible night, almost sleepless, yet again. 04:00hrs: Decided to give up on sleeping and get the ablutions done early. No shower, too noisy that early for disturbing the neighbours. On the 2nd Catheter bag emptying, I was happy to see was Rating 2: Great! The right ankle ulcer had somehow been hidden from view this morning when I took these shots of it? But the fatty tissue on the feet and ankle made walking and hobbling a smidgen dodgy all through the day. But, Although I came close a few times… I avoided any tumbles. . Pareidoliaing here with this shot. I see lips and or a mouth in there around the ankle bone? Hehe!
Went into the kitchenette to get the kettle on for a brew of Punjana Signature Blend tea. The moon and sky looked blue to my eyes, so ~I took a snap of it. Mede the mug of tea as I went to get the milk from the fridge (Well, that’s where I keep it – Hehe!) I saw how the moon and sky colours had changed in about five minutes? I tried to get a good shot of it with the craters showing, but couldn’t get it right this morning. I think I took four photos of it, and this one is the best of the selection; on one, I actually caught only half of the moon. That is due to , and my nerve-end dying . They also caught me out when I was stirring the tea in the mug. Innit gobsmacking how maybe 2fl oz of liquid that spilt form the cup manages to spread itself on your dressing gown, hate counter, and the floor, and miraculously a few drops get into your right slipper? Cleaning that up was no fun. Ailments , & were all activated by the time I’d got the mess cleaned up and replaced the dressing gown. Got the Health Check belatedly done from the notepad. Well, this week is a vast improvement on last week’s returns! On the level tab, the L=Low, M= Medium and H= High for each scale. Just look at the urine colour chart levels. Looking so good at the moment. (Just, mayhap I shouldn’t have said that?)
duties. Not good at all, in several ways: ①: The time lost waiting for the fully-in-control of . I tried to do the crossword while waiting for the action that had come part-way and was stuck rigidly to restart. But , and were making it very difficult to read the clues. So I counted the cracks and cobwebs on the wet room ceiling instead. Cracks 32, Webs 2.
②: I gave forth with a convoluted sort of… “Oooohargh… ach, (grinding what few teeth I have left) Ohohoho… Phew!” As the motion finally passed! ③: Then the task of cleaning things up. The water closet was not refilled again. So, I had to fetch water from the kitchen. Not an easy task with a walking stick and carrying basins of water, but I got it done in the end. ④: I managed the four trips balancing act, and I got the tank refilled. But, on leaving the room, I shoulder-charged the door frame edge again! This encouraged to join the other active ailments. I know I shouldn’t have, but I took an extra-strong over-the-counter Ibuprofen painkiller after I realised how bad the level of bother was that was giving me. At one stage, I checked to make sure that the shoulder bone hadn’t been detached from my elephantine, flobby-bodied torso. Hehehe!
Still a cloudless sky out there. It hardly looks like Nottingham usually does from the Detention Cells at Winwood Heights. I’m in cell-block Woodthorpe Courts. It was a life sentence. You won’t be able to get your medications; The Wardens have told me that they will arrive the next day… on eleven occasions over the last three weeks. I did get part of them, with the usually failed promise that the rest will be delivered or fetched by the Carers tomorrow – again. Naturally, I’m still waiting for them. The NHS seem to be having difficulties getting any a . The water in the WC tank is not refilling, so I have to carry water to refill it from the kitchen every time I need to empty the catheter contents or use the . Many an , , and tumble. Also, my walking into doors and window-frames are all part & parcel of life in my beloved Woodthorpe Court Cell Block. Still, it’s much better than them posting/moving me to an ‘Alcatraz’ (Care Home).After I had the stroke, the needed bed space at the hospital, and I@ was dispatched to such a home… and remember many of the events during my 3-month stay. If it wasn’t for Brother-in-Law Pete and Sister Janet fetching clothing from the flat for me, I’d have run out of clothes. So many did not return from the laundry; you would not believe it! Fair enough, here in the Woodthorpe Cell Block, over the last six months, I’ve lost five bobble hats, four T-shirts, two towels, a dressing gown, pyjamas, and a jumper. But this is nothing compared to the Alcatraz. One week, I sent six items, and I never saw them again! I’m not a lucky person.
The wonderfully healthy-looking colour of the catheter bag’s contents continued to be, well, impressive! great!
I made an Asda order for next week. All went well, but of course, is their habit; there will be price increases and not available to add to the equation and situation.
During the day, Carers Sam, Josef, Jodie and Sam called on me.
In the PM, the sun got through. I took these shots facing the sun, and was pretty pleased with how they came out.
The weariness dawned on me, and my eyes were failing again. This is now a hemerine event. and will be, until I can get at least the cataract operation done and dusted. That is if I live long enough or the shortages of medications do not see me off first. I can see the headlines now: ‘Old Fart in Nottingham killed by the NHS & Parmascist’ Haha!
This view of the late afternoon clouds was an absolute pareidolia’s delight! And I found some animals in it, not saying what they were. That’s because, my looking at this now, I can no longer find them. I do feel a right fool! Which is understandable.
Waking up just in time to get these two shots of the brilliant sunset as the sun fell out of view over the horizon. ♥
The day bag emptying was again almost a perfect colour!.
again. Carer woke me up. Sorted what med we had in stock. And, of course, no night bags to swap for the day bag on … one day, we may get some. My estimate would be approximately September 2029. Or am I being over-optimistic in thinking I’ll live that long? Haha! ♬ Food Glorious Food ♬: Got in a bit of a pickle with having to work out the timing of the cooking of this feast. The oven, saucepan and microwave were all used in the preparation. Sliced crispy roast spuds, boiled spuds, carrots, onions, and beetroot with gravy and soy mince. I enjoyed this one. And the plain yoghourt with lemon curd added. Flavour-Rating: 8/10.
But I was grossly disappointed in the lack of sleep again! No pains this time, just wave after wave of Thought Storms. Humph!
Go Forth with hopes of better times to come… Or, not like! Hahaha!
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – OVERVIEW: Still flat-bound. No s nor any more of the 3 weeks overdue prescription medications received!Nothing was heard from the EENT Hospital about , or the operations possibly coming to fruition yet. Fancy that!
The first, and only one up to now, visit proffered an evacuation deposit that took ten minutes to push and coax out. Cost some blood and was painful, tearing some of the poor . Although the main issue was rock solid and clunked against the porcelain, it was followed by some messy, gooey, smelly mush! As I have often said: This daily agony, bleeding, frustrations, and many ailments, botherations, and failures do not bother me in the slightest. I only cried for two minutes!
Gave up on sleeping, and I rose (precariously) at 045:00hrs.
Emptied the day Catheter bag, rinsed, washed & disinfected the grey wee-wee bin. was beginning another attack as I was sorting the waste bins out. Thought I’d left the tap running at first, but it was only the poor old eyes; more specifically, it was methinks was to blame.
On refilling in auto-mode, as is the catheter’s habit, the dark colour of the wee-wee was a disappointment this morning.
Trouble, as described above, on the first visit.
Took this photo with the flash on as I went to make a brew Glengettie.
It was pitch black outside; nothing at all like this photograph came out looking.
. The flash of the flash made me think it was the moon. Hehe! I opened the window and shuddered with the cold breeze that met me face-on.
Now this is how the morning looked in reality (Not that I’m an expert in anything regarding reality; of course)
Forgot the tea, left it on the counter and went onto the computer. Later I remembered I’d forgotten the tea, went to make another one, and took this shot of the car park below.
Carer Shaquille did for me, and then Domestic Denise arrived. Then Carer Ator or Victor, then Carer Victor… yes, I’m confused too, called.
Each break, I got lost in where I was and what I was doing on the blog. Hehehe!
Later, the sunshine tried t get through for me.
Looking a little warmer out there now.
I was getting suddenly tired again, earlier than ever?
Not sure… no, I have no idea what the heck I took this shot for. It was supposed to show the urine colouration, but somehow or other, I took my kneecap? Mmm?
No good, got have a sit and rest, try to get some lost kip mayhap.
No chance of any rest at all, despite my terrible tiredness and the brain and body telling me to sleep. was launching the non-stop at me. I genuinely feared for my sanity. So many worries, past and present, were zooming into my mind… none getting any solutions, ever-changing subjects. Me getting more and more agitated at my incapabilities to get things sorted… self-loathing and mixed in here and there, many a pathetic whimpering moment of self-pity. I spent hours stewing in my thoughts – so frustrated… Maybe the worst two hours of the week. Defeat and impotence & inadequacy to face and actually tackle any of the worries. No one to help me with this… mind you, is there anyone capable of helping me get the medications and the catheter night pouches delivered? Or to get me online so I can get into my banking details? Something has to change here. I’m struggling.
Mind Blank for an hour or two after I got up to make a meal. Seems the ‘Meal’ was a vegan burger, cob, cheese curls & some beetroot. Buggered, if I can recall eating it at all? But this photo found on the SD card found in the morning proves I must have. More forgotten photos: This shot of the sky on the right must have been taken in the afternoon… I shouldn’t wonder, perhaps, possibly, maybe… but that really is a guess with the darker clouds? Of course, I could it be a well-off estimate. (I’m good at this and getting things wrong – a bit of an expert?) Also found this one. Judging by the sun going down, I must have taken this one from 18:30 to 20:30hrs. Again, there is a slight possibility that I might be wrong about this as well.No memory of taking it remains to access, in ‘s abode. That being my Brain, of course. Aha, these night pictures showing the moon from the kitchenette window triggered a flash of memory for me!
Mystery Picture Again!
If I’m right, I’d had to get up to take a painkiller as I laid there in the c1966. charity shop bought, second-hand, wincingly grotty, beige coloured, not working, crumb-covered from the nocturnal nibblings, & itch-making, uncomfortable, virus breeding, easy-to-fall-out-of, recliner and waiting fruitlessly for sleep to arrive. I decided to make a brew of Thompsons’ Punjana tea and spotted Mr Moon up there in the sky. Yes, I recall it now; I remember being disappointed in my efforts. Laughing it off, I meandered hobblingly over to the sink and got the pots washed. Got them done, and could I find the camera? Nope! My tired muddled mind mused of this. An in-depth search was started, drawers, cupboards, cabinets, fridge, cooker and oven, window ledge, the floor, and all corners/edges… Now panic was setting in. Had I somehow dropped it out of the window? Surely not; there is a strap on it. I always use that; I thread my skinny wrists through it or put it over my head.. BOING! In fact, , mayhap I looked down at the camera hanging down from the cord around my neck and resting on my man breasts!
I was not happy with myself, and self recriminationalisationing commenced. The insults and language used were positively atrocious. As if I’d not had enough humiliation for one day (Again!). I returned the camera to its usual location. To be frank, I just wanted to take some sleeping pills and hide away in peace for a while with Sweet Morpheus. Is that too much to beg for? But, no chance of that! Oh… No! The need for the arrived. The timing narked me a smidge. Obviously, I was well-tensed-up to start with. And the need was becoming more urgent; I had no choice other than to hasten to the wet room… Giving the door frame edge a shoulder charge that any Welsh rugby fan would have been proud of. This prompted along with shaking into action. They both kept at it all night long. Only to be joined for an hour or so by .
My battle to get to sleep was interrupted when sweet . needed to be emptied. I found that my usually rather anaemic, cadaverous, or eidolic leg colour was transmogrifying into a deep red in the extremities?
Now, this could be my INR level being too high or low, No blood test for over a month, so how will I know? My ankles were swollen; this will sound bizarro… Do you see the valve leaking? Colour of cappuccino. Or maybe rather more like a Cinzano, The valve opened AGAIN of its own accord… I took this photograph to record the problemo… I’ll take it with me to show St. Peter when I go, There may be fisticuffs, though!
It cost me an hour to clean up the mess and myself again. The moment I got back down in the £300, second-hand shop bought nine years ago, c1966, discomfiting, alarmingly beige-coloured, crumb-containing, TV remote hiding, not working recliner; Just what I needed, a return of the Thought Storming!
Gave-up the silly thoughts of sleeping around 04:00hrs and got the ablutionalisationing done. Humph!
After last night’s near disaster with the computer – that resigned me to the fate of the computer’s death. I was worried stiff, and convinced that it was Kaput! Dead, finished! Now how can I get through, with no computer to order food in, get in touch with the bank (not that I can now, will have to rely on Kara to help me out once again, bless her, in getting online with the bank. Without the computer, this is mission impossible; Thus another sleepless night. Ailments kept waking me up. Doreen’s Dementia made concentration out of the question, but did it get me panicking a little… alright then, a lot! Yet this morning, things seemed back to normal with the computer? Carer Kara arrived for the first call of the day. I do love seeing her. I was going to ask her again if she fancied adopting me as a grandad… but forgot too. Humph! She changed the catheter bag for me, gave me the medications and explained about the medication cock-up with the chemist. Then she called someone about the night bag shortages. Telling me the clinic will send me some to the flat. Super-Gal!
We had a natter, and off she trotted, taking the waste bag with her.
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I was amazed and overjoyed (Naturally, this did not last long). When then the computer came on, it seemed to be operating correctly-ish. Of course, I’d lost track of where I was up to, what I had done, and what needed doing next to the blog. Although there’s nothing new about this!
The first trip to the proved to be a slight improvement on the previous day’s evacuation efforts. But worryingly, there was deep red and thick textured blood for the first time in weeks. I’m a smidgen concerned about the lack of any haematology nurses arriving for three weeks now to take some blood to analyse the INR (Warfarin) level. Has someone told them I’ve snuffed it, so I don’t need to bother? Also, I only have a part pack of Warfarin left in the medical drawer? Only one tube of Fenbid Forte, No Codeines, Paracetamol, No Lanzoprazole, No Bisoprolol (Beta-blockers), No Furesomide (Water tablets), or any Prochlorperazine tablets. Not to mention ‘s, or rather the absence of! Carer Kara rang about these for me this morning to try and get some that the chemist says he cannot get a hold of at all! This is not good! The continence team will try an alternative bag to see if these are in stock. This drawer has never been emptier. NHS problems? Pharmacy problems? Supplier problems? I’m also on the last few dregs of the Chloramphenicol Eye Drops. Thank heavens for Carer Kara’s help.
She returned later the second call and tried to get through to the bank to ask for written statements and get me online. But it was an on-hold call that the gal could not wait for, other jobs to tend to, people to be cared for. She did her best for me, but there was no answer to the calls, and she had to go through a series of questions to get through to nobody! Thanks for trying, gal! ♥ Much appreciated!
Now I can get the ablutions tended to before returning to this blog. Put the dressing gown into the laundry bag, got a new one near the wet room door, and turned on the towel airer to use later. I’ll time it again, going on at 12:25 hours. All done and cleared up by 14:00 hours: Best time this month. Is my luck changing… , I do ask some silly questions at times! “Is my luck changing?” Tsk!
16:30hrs: Going to get the early meal started now, folks.
Changed into sunglasses. I was feeling drained, nearly blind and strained. I’ll finish this in the morning. I hope!
Good Morning! Oh, dearie me… the nosh was disappointing last night. The same ready-made meal as last night, but this one had a lot of large chunks of carrots, which would typically be welcomed, but these were undercooked! Shame! Wonder what the third one (the last in the fridge) might taste like? Still, the oven-baked potato chunks were well cooked by yours truly. And the cheap yoghourt with lemon curd put in went down nicely. The best I can give for Taste-Rating for this one is 4/10.
Tried to stay awake to watch ‘Heartbeat’, but no! Carer Josef arrived and woke me up. Is there no rest in this aged, grotty-looking c1966 made, charity-shop-bought, horribly beige-coloured, £300, Harold’s Haemorrhoid-testing, non-operational, acne-giving, virus-breeding, rickety, easy-to-fall-out-of recliner? Obviously, not a lot! Josef medicated me and got off ASAP to let me fall asleep again, Bless him. I was soon back in the land of nod. Zzz!
Two-Hours later, from the door chime. I burst awake with a jolting, jarring, buffeting, twitching, and finally fluttered back into a semi-imitation wakefulness. Most reluctantly! But suddenly, sleep was of no interest. For it was Carer Carolynne who’d arrived. She gave the medications and checked the taps (faucets), and the stove was not left on. A little mini natter and laugh were enjoyed, and off she trotted on her missions. Could I get back to sleep? NO! Despite my mind and body demanding that I get more shut-eye, the brain and/or Sweet Morpheus denied me! Hours later, I did drift off and swiftly (it felt to me) went into a dream where Grizelda and I were on a big fairground wheel – snuggling up! Great!
Then, damn it… the kicked in. AARGH! Was I ropeable, furious, fuming, piqued, irritated, narked, depressed, or fed-up? YES! Was I once again in pain? YES! Was I suicidal? NO!
I feel my future, limited as it is, could be Panglossian
In a detrimental, foolishly-optimistic, unpropitious way…
Pickled walnuts and Gragknangles. Another day of delays and frustrations! Anything go-wrongable did! A day & nightmare. No medications, catheter night pouches arrived!. Or help with the banking on the computer. Took a tumble mopping the kitchen floor! The computer is doing really-weird things on its own accord. No chance of getting the blog done. So it’ll be a quick blog. Had to ask Carer for help with the Wilko order after getting in a mess with it. I am honestly getting to the end of my tether. 20:45 hrs and this is as far as I’ve got with it.
And red hat went to the laundry and never got back!
Fair colour after the first pouch emptying..
Took the pad off of the geyser legs. Getting in a mess with it
Walked around taking photos after investigating why I’d been woken up. Eerie.
Red sky morning shot.
Housing view.
Carer Kara watched as I put a new pad on.
Asda Order arrived. Daffodils for the Carers
The fridge filled up;
Fair colour after the third pouch emptying.
Afternoon sunshine.
Sun got through.
Evening sunset of sorts.
Nosh
Base of the meal, ready-made.
A photo with the camera cover dropped down. Unintended, of course! Meal served up; With added oven bakes potato chunks. Plain yoghourt with lemon curd added. Smashing Meal!
Sleep was another grind! Getting to sleep was hard work… Staying asleep was harder work… Between then, , and … oh, was active throughout the ever-wakening night, as well.
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – Fan-Bloody-Tastic! – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – My window-frame head-butting session from yesterday
that I thought might affect my brain… Hahaha! The things I come out with!
Affect my brain? A little late to do any serious harm to it.
The brain has had milling
about inside for a year or so now. As it turned out, no
damage was detected. In fact, I was a little disappointed
with the bruise quality, as it’s almost gone this morning!
Still, it didn’t affect my distinguished looks. Hehehe!
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
A decent kip compared to the last few week’s efforts. Unbothered by , or by the double-glazed head-butting wound on my forehead. However… conversely, , then combined to ruin the nocturnal sleeping session on their own. They both eased off at the same time, around 06:00hrs. At about 07:30hrs, arrived. I was so pleased to see him at last. But I was so tired I could not communicate properly. He told me to ring Matron about the leaking papules. Can’t recall much more; I think I kept nodding off while he was talking. Not being rude; just worn out through lack of sleep. I think he said as he left he’ll see me next Monday? A look at the roster later backed this up. Shame, only once a week.
I ran Matron. Later a Nurse came; she was a little miffed with me ringing in. I explained although was trying Otto stop me from talking, doing a reasonable job too: That the Carer, who was just out of the hospital with a similar problem, advised me to. I didn’t impress her! If looks could have killed through the ether, I’d not be writing this now! Even though not my fault – I humbly apologised as she swooshed out of the door, but missed whatever it was she said back to me. (Probably a good thing?) Don’t think that she scared me… but she did! Hahaha!
The wee-weeing started slowly, then suddenly got a move on. Once again, an excellent colour – but a horrible pong when I emptied the bag!
.
After the third visit to the , each one was messy.
. I belatedly made the first brew of the day. The dark clouds seemed to be moving quickly. Ether that or and/or , was assisting to make my eyesight even worse than yesterday. Mid-afternoon, I had to stop using the computer as my vision worsened, and I got tired again. This happens if you don’t get much sleep; I’ve noticed this!
Minutes after taking this shot, the sun came through the clouds.
. The skies quickly turned blue. But the sun was not shining on the car park below; it was shaded by the trees. I’ll try again later is I remember to… There I go again! Dreaming!.
I’ll have to pack up soon; the eyes are making things to complicated for me on WordPress. I’ll try to get some suitable Cartoons sorted out in a bit.
I did take this shot up high in the sky… A few lonely little clouds… But still highly pareidoliable! Be nice to know if either of the blog readers can see in the above what I can? Natural, I may be at an advantage with eye problems.
According to what I’ve looked up on the web, is the culprit that makes things appear to be moving when they are not. A beastie with jaws, I see?
Going to get an early meal, but a ready-made one. Lamb Moussaka! Make some gravy, and bake some cut-up spuds in the oven. A sourdough roll or two to dunk in the fodder… best-laid plans, and all that… I’m off…
Tuesday morning late (At last, I got some sleep) was Far too much, although I must have needed it, I suppose.
CATCH-UP: The supper went as planned…
Flavour Rating: 802/10!
I washed the pots and got my head down really early.
Carer Jodie arrived, waking me up, and medicated me, checked the. wristlet alarm, taps and cooker, and we had a little natter. Despite the uncomfortableness of the c1966, £300 pound,
second-hand charity-shop bought, crumb-containing,
odour-retaining, Harold’s Haemorrhoid-testing, nauseatingly
beige-coloured, non-working, virus-breeding recliner, within
seconds of bidding her farewell, I was back in the land of nod!..
Carer Jodie woke me again. But I still like her! Checked if I needed painkillers or Peptac, and mentioned that the. Warfarin tablets are getting low. She reminded me to lock the door. How I managed to do it, I don’t know; I was deep in sleep mode. And on and off, must have slept for about 13 hours or so. At last, but wish it could have been asleep all the way through without any interruptions. But it was needed!
Oh, there was one other break in my sleep I’d forgotten about. I jouncingly, joltingly, and jarringly woke up, positive that someone had come into the flat. Not sure if it was a noise or part of a dream I’d been having, but I was certain someone was in the hallway… Dang dang dang, DANG! I grabbed Metal-Micky, not to use as a weapon, of course, just a hobbling aid; although if the yobbos were back inside the flat again, it may come in handy for that. By the time I’d struggled to free my excessively large, flabby, hanging and drooping stomached body from the c1966, £300 pound, second-hand charity-shop-bought, crumb-containing, odour-retaining, Harold’s Haemorrhoid-testing, nauseatingly beige coloured, non-working, uncomfortable recliner… if there had been anyone coming in, they would have been about ten-minutes older by the time I got to the hallway. There were no signs of any intruders, of course. I checked that the door was still locked, had a peep out through the spyhole, and it was all clear. I got back in the £300, second-hand shop bought nine years ago, c1966, discomfiting, alarmingly beige-coloured, crumb-containing, TV remote hiding, not working recliner. I seem to remember saying to myself, “After all that kip, will I be able to get back to… Zzz!
ANOTHER BAD NIGHT KIP That is only to be expected, mind you. The geyser-like papules had to keep being dried, Anne Gyner was bothersome again and with no catheter night bags available, the little day pouch had to be emptied a few times. I hope the prescriptions arrive tomorrow. (Mind, I’ve been saying this for the last two Sundays!) Will the Finasteride tablets come? Not a cat-in-hells chance of getting rid of until they do. Then I’ve to take the entire course of them, however long that will be. Then the plan is, as long as I can pass urine myself, if so, for the district nurses to take out the catheter. But if I can’t pass, the only other option is a permanent catheter to be fitted. That is not a pleasant thought. Then again, will I ever get the tablets? They were ordered three weeks ago! Hey-Ho! The water-spouting papules still had the face pattern to them this morning. I think a new one coming up has given my face lips now! Har-har!
Another mystery photo was taken?
Grand colour urine this second emptying!
Belated first mug of tea. Took this to show you the dank weather
Today had three visits. All messy! Carer Rahmat came for the first two visits. Got the ablutions done after her first visit. Did it in less than two hours. No cuts, shaving, no bleeding teeth, no Whoopsies or Accifauxpas.
Then (It had to happen with me feeling smug, of course), I went to make a brew, and I just had to take a photo of the new flowering tree over the way, which is coming on a treat.
The kettle boiled, and I got the brew made. Turned to take another photo and realised I’d left the window open. Ouch! I head-butted the edge of the frame.
An hour or so later, the sun was doing its best behind the thick clouds t
Amazingly, what seemed like minutes later…
The clouds broke. It was probably hours later cause I was busy losing the battle with the computer, which is doing the oddest of things of its own accord!.
Tea-time Carer Charly or Rihanna arrived at 20:40hrs. They’ve been struggling today; bless ’em. Gave me the medications and took a snap of my head-butting the window frame result.
What a Plonker!
Got the meal served up.
Last of the imitation meat, thank heavens. Taste: 7/10. Not good at all, this. But all the other the ingredients were okay.
Only one papule is still leaking tonight; all the others seem to be dwindling into the ether as fast as they came on.
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – PANIC STATIONS…
I don’t want to go into this too much… but…
The text from the bank indicated a worrying fact.
My balance has gone down by £3000 in a month!
I asked Carer Jodie if she could ask Carer Kara to
please have a go at getting me back in online
banking again. She tried a while ago, a couple of weeks
back, using the phone, and got the details needed and
tried to get me online with it. But, no joy. The details
given to her did not allow her/me into my account.
I really appreciate her trying in her own time too.
I’m worried, to say the least, now. Of course, I may
have got something wrong. I explained this to Jodie
and to Carer Sam later. I’m a bag of nerves!
Sam (1n:40hrs) said she would ask Kara to assist me.
Not heard anything yet (20:20hrs).
Hoping she can get hear tonight; she might be on the late
call. Every day there is something not going right! Well,
going wrong, summat to fret about.
The new medications and part of the original monthly
one have not arrived. No night catheter bags.
All a part of the NHS collapse and strikes?
My already shattered confidence and concentration are
not doing me any good. And without the needed
medications at the same time.
The thought of having to have a permanently fitted
catheter strangely left my mind today. Until a few
minutes ago, when I got some stabbing pains and
realised the bag was full & needed emptying. But
the colour of the wee-wee has been so much better
today. Although not the flow.
Which problems to worry about?
I’m sinking mentally as well.
First bag emptying. Not as dark as it looks. These day bags are in three compartments, with a shaded outer plastic. Off to the . Only two (messy) trips up to now Sorted the waste bins and bags. Carer Shaquille’s first call. The second call was from Jodie, who calmed me down a bit over the banking cock-up. But not solved anything. No Kara came, though. Second visit. Om the computer to get all mixed up and mistake making. (It was no bother!)
The weather was not nice…. Brrr!
Carer Sam arrived and said she would ask Kara if she could call on me.
This shot was a better one, got the colour as it was!
Getting dark earlier now.
A bit if a shock on the next bag emptying. Blimey, talk about bloody! And yet, the next emptying… Much better? Not complaining like!
Oh, where did the time go?
Pressed on with the blogging. Getting late now, 21:10hrs. Better get some nosh sorted out… Off to the kitchenette, I go… Hey-Ho!
Made the nosh, took a photo, and it didn’t appear on the SD card? Again!
Washed the pots, during which I felt liquid on my left lower leg? Can’t be the , that’s on the right leg. I felt a grope of the area and found some new fungal growths, about four of them, different sizes, and all leaking what appeared to be water?
I put a self-adhesive pad on them, check the Catheter Bag & colour of the urine… That was too red again. Tsk! And got my head down.
The pad was soaked in minutes and fell off. Fancy that!
Yet another crap night of sleeping. I had to keep wiping the liquid away all through the night with kitchen towels. One of the lesions is still running now (at 09:40hrs Saturday). The eyes and nose are doing a good imitation of the lesions. This reminded me of a Dr Who episode. Hehe!
Thus another horrible, tormenting night of getting up to empty the tiny day bag and wiping the weeping lesions.
I feel so lucky and blessed, you know… There are plenty worse off; wherever you go, But I’ve lost confidence and my mojo… Doreen makes my thoughts and mind an imbroglio, Whoopsies, accifauxpas, ailments to me are ipso-facto, Coping with pain? I’m an aficionado, Depression? Yes! But still a simpatico! This mind is full of confusion & mumbo-jumbo!
THE TALE OF THE LEAKING LEG! Not a Dr Who or Hammer House of Horrors tale! It could only happen within the Confines and Mysteries of 72 Woodthorpe Court, with the ghosts, wraiths, spectres, cacodaemons, apparitions, and other grotesquenesses that haunt the hallways and lobbies searching for Inchie; to curse with bad luck, create ambiguities, abstrucities, perplexities, misfortunes and botherations, to scare. worry and confuse me! This was one of their best efforts yet!
Last night’s scary quick growth of the leg lesions, and the sudden leaking of water from them, got even worse during the day. They eased off in the evening… for an hour or so, then…
New growth coming between the toes, and fate gave the papules a suitable pareidolia face to laugh at me! Hehehe! – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – Up at 06:30, wiped the water from my leg and foot. I’m getting good at this after doing it all night long instead of sleeping. Humph!
Some blood in the , that’s because we still do not have any s delivered!
First of three visits to the , all messy again!. Oddly, and reminiscent of the Dr Who episode, The Waters of Mars…
Not only the leg lesions but the eyes and nose were running???
Carer Sam arrived. The missing medications and catheter bags had not arrived yet. She brought the laundry for me and kindly hung up the dressing gowns for me. Then a little chin-wag. Thank you! Took two snaps of the depressing weather.
Carer Jo-Anne came. Had a laugh as she medicated me.
Prepped the nosh for this evening. Cooked some imitation lamb and a can of vegetable soup, well seasoned to marinate all day. Put them all together, and Carer Ayowole arrived.
Had a good cleanup of the lesions on the leg. They seem to be getting smaller now but still spurting water. I can still see the face on the leg.
Sister Jane rang, still in bed, bless her. She and hubby Pete are going to the football match this afternoon, then off to enjoy the Halle Concert at night. Nice! We had a good natter. Told her about the leg leaking. Hehehe!
The wee-wee had changed to a decent colour.
Concentration is gone, getting tired, and the eyes are getting dimmer, as is usual at this time of night.
Carer Chloe arrived; nice to see her; it’s not often she calls on me. Had a giggle, and she checked the dates on the fridge foods. (Three binned)
The lesions are getting even smaller now. Still pouring water out, though, but not all of them?
I turned on the oven to heat up ready fir the potatoes to go in.
A middling colour, not too bad.
Got the pots n the oven and turned the saucepan heat on the lowest setting to warm up ready for the spuds to go in, in half an hour or so.
Turned off this computer; as I did so, I could feel the water trickling a little quicker down the leg – another night of no sleep in the offing? Humph!.
Back in the morning… if I’ve not drowned in the night. Hehehe!
The nosh came out well…
I dined like a King… Well, maybe not! I can’t imagine King Charles with a tray on his belly, scoffing vegetable soup with extra potatoes for supper? Nor eating it with his leg with the mystery papules leaking water, stuck up on a chair that needed him to keep wiping it, as he kept spilling the gravy on his dressing gown, chest and chin. Hehehe!
At least the short-lived water-releasing papules; two days up to now, are leaking far less. But worryingly, it looked in the morning like some new ones were coming… and a few on the right leg now, too!
Yours, from the old moaner, killed by the NHS, Doreen Dementia, his mechanical aorta valve, Peripheral Neuropathy Pete, Dracula Depressions and/or lack of catheter night bags to stop his bladder infection. I mention these in the vain hope that someone will show an interest in what actually saw-me-off, in the end. when I’m gone. A bit late, I know, but wouldn’t it be lovely to come back to see other’s reactions?
Here are a few I could guess at: Unnamed: “Huh, I don’t know how the old scrote lasted so long!”
Unnamed: “I told him to go to the doctor!” Bank Manager: “Inchie? Who was that then?” My ophthalmologist: ” Ah, one less in the queue for a cataract job!” Dementia Neurologist: “I never actually saw him, but the nurses say he say he was in need of help. Didn’t get it did he? Shame!“ Local Pharmacist: “He’s dead? Hahaha! Doctor (GP): “Deceased? Ah, that’s a blessing for him; but more for me!” Audio Clinic Receptionist: Oh, pity. He was almost deal yer know!” Otolaryngologist: “Do you know, I never had a patient with more solid packed-in earwax in my life. I liked him. When getting the wax out, I’d call my colleagues to show them… they never believed that so much could have come from just two ear canals!” District Matron: “Yes, I’m sorry we couldn’t have supplied him with his much-needed medications and Catheter night bags. As he said himself; ‘At least when I snuff it, someone else will stand a chance of getting some night bags in hopes of relieving their bladder infections.” Automatic, Inc. (WordPress): Didn’t he used to write that crappy blog? St Peter: “Christ, I’ve got to put up with him now…”
