Took me a lot of effort and pain on the first ~Porcelain Throne visit. Rock solid again, followed by a second evacuation of almost liquid gooey content. My eyes were too bad to do the crossword while waiting.
As for the feeling ‘Out-Of-It’ scenario, things were better up to now.
But when the Computer Blue screen came up, the fretting and semi-panicking returned instantly.
This encouraged further worry over the non-arrival of the medications or catheter bags. And the mind wanderings were all about the current day problems with an expectancy of losing the computer at any time.
The better earlier concentration, although not good in itself, crumbled after the blue screen came on… Cragknangles! Not a lot on today.
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
The overworked Catheter day bag’s urine colour was just fine.
Even the inserted into little Inchie tube didn’t seem so much bother?
However… The Vitals readings were probably the highest they have been for a while. The combined two, I mean. I Was surprised at the SYS and DIA being so high again. Ah, well!
Clouds cross this found as the sun rises from behind the Woodthorpe Cell Block… I meant Woodthorpe Court flats. Hahaha!
The battery in the camera needed changing. The battery in the wall clock (the one that fell off of the wall) was changed as well.
A mid morning pouch emptying was a shock. A lot of dark red in there this time.
Carer Josef, Carer Sam, and Carer Carol-Anne attended up to now. (17:00hrs)
Afternoon view while the sun had retreated for an hour or so.
She was back later on, though, and she persevered for a while. Hello, Little Inchie is bleeding. Back in a bit… All stopped and fine now. Thatyointments stings but is of no bother to me. Ahem! Great balls of fire! Well Feet!
The lumps and depressions! I’m glad to report that a little bit of pareidoliaing was done with this photo. Does it not look like a thumb growing on the heel of the one on the left to you? Hahaha!
Hello, the urine has gone back to a good colour again? There will be a reason for this.
If anyone knows, can you please let me know?
I’ve decided on thick vegetable soup[ for tonight’s meal. I’ll heat up one of the brown thingamabobs in the oven… I’ll get the name shortly, bread, long, thin-shaped… Oh! Baguette, that’s it! I aim to make it with plenty of gravy to soak up with the bread. I’ll add some seasonings, mayhap a little of the soya lumps too. Slurp!
Above is the dreaded blue screen that came up on the computer. Argh!
Decent nosh under the circumstances.
Those include being miffed and pissed off. Worried, in pain and suffering from lack of sleep.
Don’t know why I said that; it’s all everyday stuff for me.
I fear for most of the day today, I was here, but my mind was far away.I started that-many plans, jobs and needs, but maybe got 10% of them done. In fact, I lost the plots more often than I retained them. I went way off-track. Let things slip, failed to remember to do things, to think anything out. I lost consciousness in a way and awareness of activities and plots planned and needed.But, do you know, I fretted and got hot under the collar far less than usual! Right up until around 20:00hrs, and all the worries, fears, shame, self-hatred returned. It was like mental torture, and the Thought-Storms kicked off and stayed with me. I was aware of the problems all the same, but just didn’t care? If I could buy a drug to put me back into that mode, I would. It was like a new lease on life. I suppose/imagine that Dementia Doreen played a hand in this, but for once, I didn’t mind. A shame it came to an end, but unfortunately, it’s left me with memory blanks over the last eleven hours. I wonder if Cannabis might help me get that wonderful part-day relief from worry back? Hey-Ho! This is the best I can give you… – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
A terrible night, almost sleepless, yet again. 04:00hrs: Decided to give up on sleeping and get the ablutions done early. No shower, too noisy that early for disturbing the neighbours. On the 2nd Catheter bag emptying, I was happy to see was Rating 2: Great! The right ankle ulcer had somehow been hidden from view this morning when I took these shots of it? But the fatty tissue on the feet and ankle made walking and hobbling a smidgen dodgy all through the day. But, Although I came close a few times… I avoided any tumbles. . Pareidoliaing here with this shot. I see lips and or a mouth in there around the ankle bone? Hehe!
Went into the kitchenette to get the kettle on for a brew of Punjana Signature Blend tea. The moon and sky looked blue to my eyes, so ~I took a snap of it. Mede the mug of tea as I went to get the milk from the fridge (Well, that’s where I keep it – Hehe!) I saw how the moon and sky colours had changed in about five minutes? I tried to get a good shot of it with the craters showing, but couldn’t get it right this morning. I think I took four photos of it, and this one is the best of the selection; on one, I actually caught only half of the moon. That is due to , and my nerve-end dying . They also caught me out when I was stirring the tea in the mug. Innit gobsmacking how maybe 2fl oz of liquid that spilt form the cup manages to spread itself on your dressing gown, hate counter, and the floor, and miraculously a few drops get into your right slipper? Cleaning that up was no fun. Ailments , & were all activated by the time I’d got the mess cleaned up and replaced the dressing gown. Got the Health Check belatedly done from the notepad. Well, this week is a vast improvement on last week’s returns! On the level tab, the L=Low, M= Medium and H= High for each scale. Just look at the urine colour chart levels. Looking so good at the moment. (Just, mayhap I shouldn’t have said that?)
duties. Not good at all, in several ways: ①: The time lost waiting for the fully-in-control of . I tried to do the crossword while waiting for the action that had come part-way and was stuck rigidly to restart. But , and were making it very difficult to read the clues. So I counted the cracks and cobwebs on the wet room ceiling instead. Cracks 32, Webs 2.
②: I gave forth with a convoluted sort of… “Oooohargh… ach, (grinding what few teeth I have left) Ohohoho… Phew!” As the motion finally passed! ③: Then the task of cleaning things up. The water closet was not refilled again. So, I had to fetch water from the kitchen. Not an easy task with a walking stick and carrying basins of water, but I got it done in the end. ④: I managed the four trips balancing act, and I got the tank refilled. But, on leaving the room, I shoulder-charged the door frame edge again! This encouraged to join the other active ailments. I know I shouldn’t have, but I took an extra-strong over-the-counter Ibuprofen painkiller after I realised how bad the level of bother was that was giving me. At one stage, I checked to make sure that the shoulder bone hadn’t been detached from my elephantine, flobby-bodied torso. Hehehe!
Still a cloudless sky out there. It hardly looks like Nottingham usually does from the Detention Cells at Winwood Heights. I’m in cell-block Woodthorpe Courts. It was a life sentence. You won’t be able to get your medications; The Wardens have told me that they will arrive the next day… on eleven occasions over the last three weeks. I did get part of them, with the usually failed promise that the rest will be delivered or fetched by the Carers tomorrow – again. Naturally, I’m still waiting for them. The NHS seem to be having difficulties getting any a . The water in the WC tank is not refilling, so I have to carry water to refill it from the kitchen every time I need to empty the catheter contents or use the . Many an , , and tumble. Also, my walking into doors and window-frames are all part & parcel of life in my beloved Woodthorpe Court Cell Block. Still, it’s much better than them posting/moving me to an ‘Alcatraz’ (Care Home).After I had the stroke, the needed bed space at the hospital, and I@ was dispatched to such a home… and remember many of the events during my 3-month stay. If it wasn’t for Brother-in-Law Pete and Sister Janet fetching clothing from the flat for me, I’d have run out of clothes. So many did not return from the laundry; you would not believe it! Fair enough, here in the Woodthorpe Cell Block, over the last six months, I’ve lost five bobble hats, four T-shirts, two towels, a dressing gown, pyjamas, and a jumper. But this is nothing compared to the Alcatraz. One week, I sent six items, and I never saw them again! I’m not a lucky person.
The wonderfully healthy-looking colour of the catheter bag’s contents continued to be, well, impressive! great!
I made an Asda order for next week. All went well, but of course, is their habit; there will be price increases and not available to add to the equation and situation.
During the day, Carers Sam, Josef, Jodie and Sam called on me.
In the PM, the sun got through. I took these shots facing the sun, and was pretty pleased with how they came out.
The weariness dawned on me, and my eyes were failing again. This is now a hemerine event. and will be, until I can get at least the cataract operation done and dusted. That is if I live long enough or the shortages of medications do not see me off first. I can see the headlines now: ‘Old Fart in Nottingham killed by the NHS & Parmascist’ Haha!
This view of the late afternoon clouds was an absolute pareidolia’s delight! And I found some animals in it, not saying what they were. That’s because, my looking at this now, I can no longer find them. I do feel a right fool! Which is understandable.
Waking up just in time to get these two shots of the brilliant sunset as the sun fell out of view over the horizon. ♥
The day bag emptying was again almost a perfect colour!.
again. Carer woke me up. Sorted what med we had in stock. And, of course, no night bags to swap for the day bag on … one day, we may get some. My estimate would be approximately September 2029. Or am I being over-optimistic in thinking I’ll live that long? Haha! ♬ Food Glorious Food ♬: Got in a bit of a pickle with having to work out the timing of the cooking of this feast. The oven, saucepan and microwave were all used in the preparation. Sliced crispy roast spuds, boiled spuds, carrots, onions, and beetroot with gravy and soy mince. I enjoyed this one. And the plain yoghourt with lemon curd added. Flavour-Rating: 8/10.
But I was grossly disappointed in the lack of sleep again! No pains this time, just wave after wave of Thought Storms. Humph!
Go Forth with hopes of better times to come… Or, not like! Hahaha!
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – OVERVIEW: Still flat-bound. No s nor any more of the 3 weeks overdue prescription medications received!Nothing was heard from the EENT Hospital about , or the operations possibly coming to fruition yet. Fancy that!
The first, and only one up to now, visit proffered an evacuation deposit that took ten minutes to push and coax out. Cost some blood and was painful, tearing some of the poor . Although the main issue was rock solid and clunked against the porcelain, it was followed by some messy, gooey, smelly mush! As I have often said: This daily agony, bleeding, frustrations, and many ailments, botherations, and failures do not bother me in the slightest. I only cried for two minutes!
Gave up on sleeping, and I rose (precariously) at 045:00hrs.
Emptied the day Catheter bag, rinsed, washed & disinfected the grey wee-wee bin. was beginning another attack as I was sorting the waste bins out. Thought I’d left the tap running at first, but it was only the poor old eyes; more specifically, it was methinks was to blame.
On refilling in auto-mode, as is the catheter’s habit, the dark colour of the wee-wee was a disappointment this morning.
Trouble, as described above, on the first visit.
Took this photo with the flash on as I went to make a brew Glengettie.
It was pitch black outside; nothing at all like this photograph came out looking.
. The flash of the flash made me think it was the moon. Hehe! I opened the window and shuddered with the cold breeze that met me face-on.
Now this is how the morning looked in reality (Not that I’m an expert in anything regarding reality; of course)
Forgot the tea, left it on the counter and went onto the computer. Later I remembered I’d forgotten the tea, went to make another one, and took this shot of the car park below.
Carer Shaquille did for me, and then Domestic Denise arrived. Then Carer Ator or Victor, then Carer Victor… yes, I’m confused too, called.
Each break, I got lost in where I was and what I was doing on the blog. Hehehe!
Later, the sunshine tried t get through for me.
Looking a little warmer out there now.
I was getting suddenly tired again, earlier than ever?
Not sure… no, I have no idea what the heck I took this shot for. It was supposed to show the urine colouration, but somehow or other, I took my kneecap? Mmm?
No good, got have a sit and rest, try to get some lost kip mayhap.
No chance of any rest at all, despite my terrible tiredness and the brain and body telling me to sleep. was launching the non-stop at me. I genuinely feared for my sanity. So many worries, past and present, were zooming into my mind… none getting any solutions, ever-changing subjects. Me getting more and more agitated at my incapabilities to get things sorted… self-loathing and mixed in here and there, many a pathetic whimpering moment of self-pity. I spent hours stewing in my thoughts – so frustrated… Maybe the worst two hours of the week. Defeat and impotence & inadequacy to face and actually tackle any of the worries. No one to help me with this… mind you, is there anyone capable of helping me get the medications and the catheter night pouches delivered? Or to get me online so I can get into my banking details? Something has to change here. I’m struggling.
Mind Blank for an hour or two after I got up to make a meal. Seems the ‘Meal’ was a vegan burger, cob, cheese curls & some beetroot. Buggered, if I can recall eating it at all? But this photo found on the SD card found in the morning proves I must have. More forgotten photos: This shot of the sky on the right must have been taken in the afternoon… I shouldn’t wonder, perhaps, possibly, maybe… but that really is a guess with the darker clouds? Of course, I could it be a well-off estimate. (I’m good at this and getting things wrong – a bit of an expert?) Also found this one. Judging by the sun going down, I must have taken this one from 18:30 to 20:30hrs. Again, there is a slight possibility that I might be wrong about this as well.No memory of taking it remains to access, in ‘s abode. That being my Brain, of course. Aha, these night pictures showing the moon from the kitchenette window triggered a flash of memory for me!
Mystery Picture Again!
If I’m right, I’d had to get up to take a painkiller as I laid there in the c1966. charity shop bought, second-hand, wincingly grotty, beige coloured, not working, crumb-covered from the nocturnal nibblings, & itch-making, uncomfortable, virus breeding, easy-to-fall-out-of, recliner and waiting fruitlessly for sleep to arrive. I decided to make a brew of Thompsons’ Punjana tea and spotted Mr Moon up there in the sky. Yes, I recall it now; I remember being disappointed in my efforts. Laughing it off, I meandered hobblingly over to the sink and got the pots washed. Got them done, and could I find the camera? Nope! My tired muddled mind mused of this. An in-depth search was started, drawers, cupboards, cabinets, fridge, cooker and oven, window ledge, the floor, and all corners/edges… Now panic was setting in. Had I somehow dropped it out of the window? Surely not; there is a strap on it. I always use that; I thread my skinny wrists through it or put it over my head.. BOING! In fact, , mayhap I looked down at the camera hanging down from the cord around my neck and resting on my man breasts!
I was not happy with myself, and self recriminationalisationing commenced. The insults and language used were positively atrocious. As if I’d not had enough humiliation for one day (Again!). I returned the camera to its usual location. To be frank, I just wanted to take some sleeping pills and hide away in peace for a while with Sweet Morpheus. Is that too much to beg for? But, no chance of that! Oh… No! The need for the arrived. The timing narked me a smidge. Obviously, I was well-tensed-up to start with. And the need was becoming more urgent; I had no choice other than to hasten to the wet room… Giving the door frame edge a shoulder charge that any Welsh rugby fan would have been proud of. This prompted along with shaking into action. They both kept at it all night long. Only to be joined for an hour or so by .
My battle to get to sleep was interrupted when sweet . needed to be emptied. I found that my usually rather anaemic, cadaverous, or eidolic leg colour was transmogrifying into a deep red in the extremities?
Now, this could be my INR level being too high or low, No blood test for over a month, so how will I know? My ankles were swollen; this will sound bizarro… Do you see the valve leaking? Colour of cappuccino. Or maybe rather more like a Cinzano, The valve opened AGAIN of its own accord… I took this photograph to record the problemo… I’ll take it with me to show St. Peter when I go, There may be fisticuffs, though!
It cost me an hour to clean up the mess and myself again. The moment I got back down in the £300, second-hand shop bought nine years ago, c1966, discomfiting, alarmingly beige-coloured, crumb-containing, TV remote hiding, not working recliner; Just what I needed, a return of the Thought Storming!
Gave-up the silly thoughts of sleeping around 04:00hrs and got the ablutionalisationing done. Humph!
Pickled walnuts and Gragknangles. Another day of delays and frustrations! Anything go-wrongable did! A day & nightmare. No medications, catheter night pouches arrived!. Or help with the banking on the computer. Took a tumble mopping the kitchen floor! The computer is doing really-weird things on its own accord. No chance of getting the blog done. So it’ll be a quick blog. Had to ask Carer for help with the Wilko order after getting in a mess with it. I am honestly getting to the end of my tether. 20:45 hrs and this is as far as I’ve got with it.
And red hat went to the laundry and never got back!
Fair colour after the first pouch emptying..
Took the pad off of the geyser legs. Getting in a mess with it
Walked around taking photos after investigating why I’d been woken up. Eerie.
Red sky morning shot.
Housing view.
Carer Kara watched as I put a new pad on.
Asda Order arrived. Daffodils for the Carers
The fridge filled up;
Fair colour after the third pouch emptying.
Afternoon sunshine.
Sun got through.
Evening sunset of sorts.
Nosh
Base of the meal, ready-made.
A photo with the camera cover dropped down. Unintended, of course! Meal served up; With added oven bakes potato chunks. Plain yoghourt with lemon curd added. Smashing Meal!
Sleep was another grind! Getting to sleep was hard work… Staying asleep was harder work… Between then, , and … oh, was active throughout the ever-wakening night, as well.
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – Fan-Bloody-Tastic! – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – My window-frame head-butting session from yesterday
that I thought might affect my brain… Hahaha! The things I come out with!
Affect my brain? A little late to do any serious harm to it.
The brain has had milling
about inside for a year or so now. As it turned out, no
damage was detected. In fact, I was a little disappointed
with the bruise quality, as it’s almost gone this morning!
Still, it didn’t affect my distinguished looks. Hehehe!
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
A decent kip compared to the last few week’s efforts. Unbothered by , or by the double-glazed head-butting wound on my forehead. However… conversely, , then combined to ruin the nocturnal sleeping session on their own. They both eased off at the same time, around 06:00hrs. At about 07:30hrs, arrived. I was so pleased to see him at last. But I was so tired I could not communicate properly. He told me to ring Matron about the leaking papules. Can’t recall much more; I think I kept nodding off while he was talking. Not being rude; just worn out through lack of sleep. I think he said as he left he’ll see me next Monday? A look at the roster later backed this up. Shame, only once a week.
I ran Matron. Later a Nurse came; she was a little miffed with me ringing in. I explained although was trying Otto stop me from talking, doing a reasonable job too: That the Carer, who was just out of the hospital with a similar problem, advised me to. I didn’t impress her! If looks could have killed through the ether, I’d not be writing this now! Even though not my fault – I humbly apologised as she swooshed out of the door, but missed whatever it was she said back to me. (Probably a good thing?) Don’t think that she scared me… but she did! Hahaha!
The wee-weeing started slowly, then suddenly got a move on. Once again, an excellent colour – but a horrible pong when I emptied the bag!
.
After the third visit to the , each one was messy.
. I belatedly made the first brew of the day. The dark clouds seemed to be moving quickly. Ether that or and/or , was assisting to make my eyesight even worse than yesterday. Mid-afternoon, I had to stop using the computer as my vision worsened, and I got tired again. This happens if you don’t get much sleep; I’ve noticed this!
Minutes after taking this shot, the sun came through the clouds.
. The skies quickly turned blue. But the sun was not shining on the car park below; it was shaded by the trees. I’ll try again later is I remember to… There I go again! Dreaming!.
I’ll have to pack up soon; the eyes are making things to complicated for me on WordPress. I’ll try to get some suitable Cartoons sorted out in a bit.
I did take this shot up high in the sky… A few lonely little clouds… But still highly pareidoliable! Be nice to know if either of the blog readers can see in the above what I can? Natural, I may be at an advantage with eye problems.
According to what I’ve looked up on the web, is the culprit that makes things appear to be moving when they are not. A beastie with jaws, I see?
Going to get an early meal, but a ready-made one. Lamb Moussaka! Make some gravy, and bake some cut-up spuds in the oven. A sourdough roll or two to dunk in the fodder… best-laid plans, and all that… I’m off…
Tuesday morning late (At last, I got some sleep) was Far too much, although I must have needed it, I suppose.
CATCH-UP: The supper went as planned…
Flavour Rating: 802/10!
I washed the pots and got my head down really early.
Carer Jodie arrived, waking me up, and medicated me, checked the. wristlet alarm, taps and cooker, and we had a little natter. Despite the uncomfortableness of the c1966, £300 pound,
second-hand charity-shop bought, crumb-containing,
odour-retaining, Harold’s Haemorrhoid-testing, nauseatingly
beige-coloured, non-working, virus-breeding recliner, within
seconds of bidding her farewell, I was back in the land of nod!..
Carer Jodie woke me again. But I still like her! Checked if I needed painkillers or Peptac, and mentioned that the. Warfarin tablets are getting low. She reminded me to lock the door. How I managed to do it, I don’t know; I was deep in sleep mode. And on and off, must have slept for about 13 hours or so. At last, but wish it could have been asleep all the way through without any interruptions. But it was needed!
Oh, there was one other break in my sleep I’d forgotten about. I jouncingly, joltingly, and jarringly woke up, positive that someone had come into the flat. Not sure if it was a noise or part of a dream I’d been having, but I was certain someone was in the hallway… Dang dang dang, DANG! I grabbed Metal-Micky, not to use as a weapon, of course, just a hobbling aid; although if the yobbos were back inside the flat again, it may come in handy for that. By the time I’d struggled to free my excessively large, flabby, hanging and drooping stomached body from the c1966, £300 pound, second-hand charity-shop-bought, crumb-containing, odour-retaining, Harold’s Haemorrhoid-testing, nauseatingly beige coloured, non-working, uncomfortable recliner… if there had been anyone coming in, they would have been about ten-minutes older by the time I got to the hallway. There were no signs of any intruders, of course. I checked that the door was still locked, had a peep out through the spyhole, and it was all clear. I got back in the £300, second-hand shop bought nine years ago, c1966, discomfiting, alarmingly beige-coloured, crumb-containing, TV remote hiding, not working recliner. I seem to remember saying to myself, “After all that kip, will I be able to get back to… Zzz!
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – PANIC STATIONS…
I don’t want to go into this too much… but…
The text from the bank indicated a worrying fact.
My balance has gone down by £3000 in a month!
I asked Carer Jodie if she could ask Carer Kara to
please have a go at getting me back in online
banking again. She tried a while ago, a couple of weeks
back, using the phone, and got the details needed and
tried to get me online with it. But, no joy. The details
given to her did not allow her/me into my account.
I really appreciate her trying in her own time too.
I’m worried, to say the least, now. Of course, I may
have got something wrong. I explained this to Jodie
and to Carer Sam later. I’m a bag of nerves!
Sam (1n:40hrs) said she would ask Kara to assist me.
Not heard anything yet (20:20hrs).
Hoping she can get hear tonight; she might be on the late
call. Every day there is something not going right! Well,
going wrong, summat to fret about.
The new medications and part of the original monthly
one have not arrived. No night catheter bags.
All a part of the NHS collapse and strikes?
My already shattered confidence and concentration are
not doing me any good. And without the needed
medications at the same time.
The thought of having to have a permanently fitted
catheter strangely left my mind today. Until a few
minutes ago, when I got some stabbing pains and
realised the bag was full & needed emptying. But
the colour of the wee-wee has been so much better
today. Although not the flow.
Which problems to worry about?
I’m sinking mentally as well.
First bag emptying. Not as dark as it looks. These day bags are in three compartments, with a shaded outer plastic. Off to the . Only two (messy) trips up to now Sorted the waste bins and bags. Carer Shaquille’s first call. The second call was from Jodie, who calmed me down a bit over the banking cock-up. But not solved anything. No Kara came, though. Second visit. Om the computer to get all mixed up and mistake making. (It was no bother!)
The weather was not nice…. Brrr!
Carer Sam arrived and said she would ask Kara if she could call on me.
This shot was a better one, got the colour as it was!
Getting dark earlier now.
A bit if a shock on the next bag emptying. Blimey, talk about bloody! And yet, the next emptying… Much better? Not complaining like!
Oh, where did the time go?
Pressed on with the blogging. Getting late now, 21:10hrs. Better get some nosh sorted out… Off to the kitchenette, I go… Hey-Ho!
Made the nosh, took a photo, and it didn’t appear on the SD card? Again!
Washed the pots, during which I felt liquid on my left lower leg? Can’t be the , that’s on the right leg. I felt a grope of the area and found some new fungal growths, about four of them, different sizes, and all leaking what appeared to be water?
I put a self-adhesive pad on them, check the Catheter Bag & colour of the urine… That was too red again. Tsk! And got my head down.
The pad was soaked in minutes and fell off. Fancy that!
Yet another crap night of sleeping. I had to keep wiping the liquid away all through the night with kitchen towels. One of the lesions is still running now (at 09:40hrs Saturday). The eyes and nose are doing a good imitation of the lesions. This reminded me of a Dr Who episode. Hehe!
Thus another horrible, tormenting night of getting up to empty the tiny day bag and wiping the weeping lesions.
I feel so lucky and blessed, you know… There are plenty worse off; wherever you go, But I’ve lost confidence and my mojo… Doreen makes my thoughts and mind an imbroglio, Whoopsies, accifauxpas, ailments to me are ipso-facto, Coping with pain? I’m an aficionado, Depression? Yes! But still a simpatico! This mind is full of confusion & mumbo-jumbo!
THE TALE OF THE LEAKING LEG! Not a Dr Who or Hammer House of Horrors tale! It could only happen within the Confines and Mysteries of 72 Woodthorpe Court, with the ghosts, wraiths, spectres, cacodaemons, apparitions, and other grotesquenesses that haunt the hallways and lobbies searching for Inchie; to curse with bad luck, create ambiguities, abstrucities, perplexities, misfortunes and botherations, to scare. worry and confuse me! This was one of their best efforts yet!
Last night’s scary quick growth of the leg lesions, and the sudden leaking of water from them, got even worse during the day. They eased off in the evening… for an hour or so, then…
New growth coming between the toes, and fate gave the papules a suitable pareidolia face to laugh at me! Hehehe! – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – Up at 06:30, wiped the water from my leg and foot. I’m getting good at this after doing it all night long instead of sleeping. Humph!
Some blood in the , that’s because we still do not have any s delivered!
First of three visits to the , all messy again!. Oddly, and reminiscent of the Dr Who episode, The Waters of Mars…
Not only the leg lesions but the eyes and nose were running???
Carer Sam arrived. The missing medications and catheter bags had not arrived yet. She brought the laundry for me and kindly hung up the dressing gowns for me. Then a little chin-wag. Thank you! Took two snaps of the depressing weather.
Carer Jo-Anne came. Had a laugh as she medicated me.
Prepped the nosh for this evening. Cooked some imitation lamb and a can of vegetable soup, well seasoned to marinate all day. Put them all together, and Carer Ayowole arrived.
Had a good cleanup of the lesions on the leg. They seem to be getting smaller now but still spurting water. I can still see the face on the leg.
Sister Jane rang, still in bed, bless her. She and hubby Pete are going to the football match this afternoon, then off to enjoy the Halle Concert at night. Nice! We had a good natter. Told her about the leg leaking. Hehehe!
The wee-wee had changed to a decent colour.
Concentration is gone, getting tired, and the eyes are getting dimmer, as is usual at this time of night.
Carer Chloe arrived; nice to see her; it’s not often she calls on me. Had a giggle, and she checked the dates on the fridge foods. (Three binned)
The lesions are getting even smaller now. Still pouring water out, though, but not all of them?
I turned on the oven to heat up ready fir the potatoes to go in.
A middling colour, not too bad.
Got the pots n the oven and turned the saucepan heat on the lowest setting to warm up ready for the spuds to go in, in half an hour or so.
Turned off this computer; as I did so, I could feel the water trickling a little quicker down the leg – another night of no sleep in the offing? Humph!.
Back in the morning… if I’ve not drowned in the night. Hehehe!
The nosh came out well…
I dined like a King… Well, maybe not! I can’t imagine King Charles with a tray on his belly, scoffing vegetable soup with extra potatoes for supper? Nor eating it with his leg with the mystery papules leaking water, stuck up on a chair that needed him to keep wiping it, as he kept spilling the gravy on his dressing gown, chest and chin. Hehehe!
At least the short-lived water-releasing papules; two days up to now, are leaking far less. But worryingly, it looked in the morning like some new ones were coming… and a few on the right leg now, too!
Yours, from the old moaner, killed by the NHS, Doreen Dementia, his mechanical aorta valve, Peripheral Neuropathy Pete, Dracula Depressions and/or lack of catheter night bags to stop his bladder infection. I mention these in the vain hope that someone will show an interest in what actually saw-me-off, in the end. when I’m gone. A bit late, I know, but wouldn’t it be lovely to come back to see other’s reactions?
Here are a few I could guess at: Unnamed: “Huh, I don’t know how the old scrote lasted so long!”
Unnamed: “I told him to go to the doctor!” Bank Manager: “Inchie? Who was that then?” My ophthalmologist: ” Ah, one less in the queue for a cataract job!” Dementia Neurologist: “I never actually saw him, but the nurses say he say he was in need of help. Didn’t get it did he? Shame!“ Local Pharmacist: “He’s dead? Hahaha! Doctor (GP): “Deceased? Ah, that’s a blessing for him; but more for me!” Audio Clinic Receptionist: Oh, pity. He was almost deal yer know!” Otolaryngologist: “Do you know, I never had a patient with more solid packed-in earwax in my life. I liked him. When getting the wax out, I’d call my colleagues to show them… they never believed that so much could have come from just two ear canals!” District Matron: “Yes, I’m sorry we couldn’t have supplied him with his much-needed medications and Catheter night bags. As he said himself; ‘At least when I snuff it, someone else will stand a chance of getting some night bags in hopes of relieving their bladder infections.” Automatic, Inc. (WordPress): Didn’t he used to write that crappy blog? St Peter: “Christ, I’ve got to put up with him now…”
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – Annuver mind-blowing, busy, getting nothing done, and frustrating… but not so much so as yesterday was! I think.
But don’t let fool you. It was horrendous!
When I say horrendous, it wasn’t all horrible; there were about ten minutes of near-contentment around 13:00hrs.
The promise of the medications about to arrive was soon demolished.
About a third of them came. But no Catheter night bags, and the new tablets for the Prostate reduction, failed to make it.
So, the night is going to be another one of agony.
Another promise of the rest of the things to arrive tomorrow; I’m not too hopeful of fruition after waiting for a fortnight. No Warfarin, but I do have a few left. No INR nurse arrived to take the blood for testing. No DVT nurse came for the vein draining. Heard nothing about the next brain scan. The after-stroke & falls team have not appeared for a few weeks. I’m out of the cream for Little Inches’ fungal lesion.
And I’ve had a tumble in the kitchen. Hands and knees job back to the front room, knocking the bottles of spring water off of the ottoman en route… with one of them landing right on my Onychovryotosis (ingrowing toenail). Slipped using the arm of the c1966. charity shop bought, second-hand, wincingly grotty, beige coloured, not working, crumb-covered from the nocturnal nobbling, itch-making, uncomfortable, virus breeding, easy-to-fall-out-of recliner, to get back up on my feet. Had to sit down for a while.
The Carer gals had done their best for me.
But there is always that feeling; ‘What next!’ There’s always something going wrong. Now it’s emails from Grammarly telling me my renewal has been refused, but not why. Is it another con job?
Depression is a constant in my life now!
Still, the Matron called to see me. She’s been asked to by the Doctor, who was worried about me? Now that’s new and nice! I mentioned the lack of medications, night bags for the catheter, and the odd sensations that overcome me at times. The problems with mail, email and the computer, not being able to get onto online banking to sort things out; and no help available with these issues. At least, I think I mentioned these difficulties to Matron. If not, I meant to.
Now 23:45hrs, and I’m up to here in the blog. Tired, smelly, worried, half-out-of-it, and so hungry. Nowt new here then… – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
A night of with the odd bother from tormenting ensuring that I seemed to spend longer awake than asleep. I gave up trying around 05:00hrs.
The urine looks darker than it really was when I emptied the pouch.
No change in the ankles.
No chance of any cloud pareidoliaing this morning. White cars rule in the car park.
Jimminee, the colour of the wee this time was almost perfect. And I was passing a lot, too!
The computer on! Made an order for Asda for next week. And signed up for the Delivery pass, which should save me a little. Went for the cheaper one, so I have to book orders for Tue-Wed-Thur each time to get it free.
The urine is getting a move-on today. Lovely colour too!
Wonderful clouds this afternoon!
During the day, I had Carers Kara, Domestic Denise, Carer Josef, and Carer Carer Sam, who brought the part-medications for me; bless her. And bless Carer Carolynne, who looked at the computer problem for me. No decision was made or action was taken; mind you, she didn’t have the time.
Went to check on the spuds in the slow cooker. Not sure how I took this photo?
Matron arrived. As I said earlier, whatever I could remember about the medicationalistical situation, I passed on to her. Got a student with her.
Hahaha! The wee kept on coming! A good thing, methinks?
Overcast as the rain stopped, I took this picture. Not very good, is it? Tsk!.
It’s gerrin’ a better colour as the night comes on! Great!
Nosh Served Up
The potatoes were slow-cooked with sea salt & vinegar. Can if garden peas, and a first for me, never tried them before, imitation fish goujons, with a cob or two. Followed by the cheapest of yoghourts, flavoured with some lemon curd mixed in. (Nice!) The vegan batter on the goujons was okay; the content of them was, well… tasteless! Disappointing, shan’t bother with them again. Overall, a flavour rating of 6.2/10.
Left the pots in the sink soaking and got my head down. Colin Cramps gave me a break, and even Anne Gyna onlywoke me up with her stabbing pains about six times. The tiny day catheter pouch Still none of the larger night bags delivered); let me know it needed emptying twice. As you can see by the top Ode, Dementia Doreen gave me an odd dream to use in the rhyme. Bless her!
May you find fun and festivities & have fantastic future feasts frequently!
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – Overview, Revue & Waffling Ode I sat looking at the screen for an age, impotent, Trying to be creative, but I couldn’t, The brains power and batteries were absent, The mind was not interested nor compliant! But, I was determined to get through this addlement… This Mind-Blank, with a feeling of being insignificant, My thought process is uncomplaisant… Was it Doreen’s Dementia being defiant? The thoughts fused, terribly absonant… Focus clarifies a smidgen, then back to blent, Many hours I’ve just spent… Doing this ode, although claudicant… I’ve written very little, originally meant… Going through denudement, with no denouement!
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
The urine was another bad colour.
Popped through the letterbox was a leaflet regarding Winwood Heights Social activities. Which was impossible to read due to the small print and, of course, , & are chief suspects as well. My immediate desires inspired, were for me to go on a day trip out to the coast, maybe? Then, of course, reality kicked in. How the heck would I cope with the catheter and bag emptying? Taking the medications? Ans, should be some miracle I made it to Skegness; there would be no way on the planet that I could resist a fish & chip meal! Then, of course, should I be foolish enough to go on one – there is little doubt that one of the medical procedures I’m on the list for would arrive on the same day! Plenty to choose from; Cataracts, Glaucoma, Saccades, replacement bladder, and DVT vein bleed. Or another one of the Brain Scans. I’ll have to go into a self-sulk mode and forget about any idea of a day at the seaside; it’s just impracticable! (Is that the right word?)
The Iceland order arrived.
Strawberry treats for the gals. With some different drinks this time. Vanilla ice-cream-flavoured ones. I tried one later from the fridge – very nice! The especially ‘flattened’ wholemeal rolls. Miraculously, they had some of the cheap kitchen towels in stock for once.
The highlight was a meal I had never tried before. Looking forward to this.
Good Heavens…
The urine was running a much healthier colour!
Mind Blank Time One minute I was on the computer, went to the Throne, and found myself five hours later, standing in the kitchen taking photos in the dark?Obviously, Carers had called, but could I remember who and when? No!
Raining!
Got back to the computer but just could not focus, so packed up and back to take the photos again.
The rain has stopped, and as I went into the kitchenette, the sun found a gap in the clouds, offering me some pareidoliaing time.
Got the oven on heating up for the potato chunks. The ready meal will go in the microwave for nine minutes. So potatoes in when the heat gets to 200, 20 minutes later, I can put the Moussaka in the microwave, and hopefully, they will both be ready at the same time.
Back to the . The messy evacuation needed cleaning up. Then I realised that the WC tank was filling up very slowly – and while doing it, there was no water available from the cold tap on the sink? Friday night again – things always go wrong when there is no one on-site to help! Grumph!
Back to check on the meal to check… But could not resist these views, a Pareidlia’s delight!
. Both of these snaps offered up a multitude of figures for me to identify. The fact is, I was at it so long I overcooked the potatoes – but nae bother, I like them tinged a little brown around the edges.
Gorgeous tasting this one was! I was sat in the second-hand shop-bought, £300, c1968, overwhelmingly-sickeningly-beige coloured, tatty, uncomfortable, wobbly, germ-producing, falling to pieces, food residue collecting recliner, feasting on this wonderfully flavoured fodder; when, in came Carer Jozef. He was soon off, with no night bag to change and no medications to give – they have still not arrived yet!
Finished off the nosh, washed things up and settled to watch a Jonathan Creek episode on the TV. But it was not to be... Zzz!
I’d like to report that things were very much better today. But I can’t! The agony of worries over the shortages of medications and the tube chaffing from tube; many other things, but the main one was , who was winning the battle with never having been so bad. , & ensured that my vision was crap and getting worse. Plus, so many hours were spent correcting mistakes. Just thought I’d mention it.
As usual for the last two weeks, frustratingly, there was no night-bag to change. This mystery of the medication’s non-arrival, and unattainable night catcher bags, is the reason for the pain I’m suffering. The night bag gave the day bag a refresh, which I believe helped clear the infection from the bladder. The mega-high Blood Pressure and the darkening urine since these things stopped coming to indicate this to me. But I’m powerless to do anything about them. No District nurse calling; new medications, along with last months medication, supposedly waiting for collection at the pharmacy. No DVT or
Phlebotomy nurse called in weeks now? I’m in bad pain through the lack of tablets. Doreen’s Dementia is affecting my responses. The eyes are making everyday tasks harder and full of accidents and mistakes. Oh, dear! Just thought I’d mention it. Not that it helps, of course.
Fancy that! But it lightened later.
Morning view
But the blood pressure was horrendous! I did extra checks in the hope that it would come down, but… Nope! Wonder if this is due to the none attainment of, and running out of some medications?
Fingers crossed
Oh the bright side (I had to look very hard, Hehe!), the ankle ulcers were nice and calm. (Says Inchie as he gets grief from the catheter tube via Little Inchie and cleans the blood up changers protection pants, . Then get more stabbings from .
A bad day all round today. Window-Man Joe called to do them. I was out of it most of the time with taking so many painkillers, I think. No idea what had happened for several hours. I keep mentioning the pain I was in to each Carer. At least, I think I must have.
Got the meal served up early, I gave up trying to concentrate on the computer. Cooked the meal without any damage. Hehe!
Sat watching TV with subtitles and devouring the pleasantly tasty meal I’d done for myself. Pretend meat (Very nice), beetroot, tomatoes, and potato cubes done in the oven after being sprayed with oil. Carer Josef arrived mid-feast. Can’t recall what happened, he was soon off, as there was no night bag to change, and I’d already taken the painkillers & Peptac. Nice lad.
