The farcicalisational hiatus ridden bathroom to wet shower room conversion continues. Humph!

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I’d like to thank my beloved new landlord, Nottingham City Homes, who after only a month or so after my requesting this be done after falling getting out of the bath for the third time, agreed to forward my application to convert my bathroom into a Shower Wet Room. After their Occupational Therapist Assessor interrogation… I mean interviewed, me to assess my disabilities and needs, then agreed a few weeks later, to do the conversion for me. A good patient chap name of Joel, thanks to him too.

A few weeks later, after their considerate Occupational Therapist Assessor’s interrogated… I mean interviewed me to assess my disabilities and needs, they agreed just a few weeks later, to do the conversion for me, in theory. The psychoanalyst was a nice patient chap name of Joel, thanks to him too.

A few months later, a letter arrived informing me they had agreed to the work after assessing the state and conditions of the bathroom and would soon be advising me of a date for assessment to take place.

Only eight weeks later, a chap arrived to do the rating and risks of the job for me. He must have been magnificent, perhaps an expert at his job because he had a Biro pen behind his left earlobe, oohed and sighed professionally and he only took four minutes to do the evaluation of the job. I gave him a cup of tea and some caramelised biscuits. He was an expert biscuit-dunker as well. He told me I’d get a letter in a week or so, informing me if the application had been approved. I thanked him, he passed an emission of wind and departed.

Sure enough, three weeks later I got the letter telling me that the commencement of the alterations would be in four weeks time.

Sad to see the bath go, but tripping and falling getting in and out getting too often and was too much of a Whoopsiedangleplop risk to life and limb!

Initially, I was a little sad at the thought of losing the bath, because I do love a good soak in Radox and scrub up with carbolic soap. But so many slips, trips and bruising of the elbows, head and hips, while getting into and out of the bath was getting a little risky for me.

Two weeks later another letter informing me that the date had been put back for another week arrived.

It was now only eight weeks away.

At least the Paramedics should be happy now I no longer have a bath! Hehe!

All the experts who spoke to me assured at the most it would be a four or five-day job.

I felt sure I’d cope somehow without a bath or use of the WC.

As the day drew near, I had the mammoth task of taking everything out of the bathroom in readiness for the arrival of the chappy man or men, who was going sort it out for me.

Bathroom all cleared ready for the man/men

Heck of a job, carrying the cabinets out to the spare room with all the other unsorted dollop of bags and boxes. I got it done the night before the arrival was expected, well-drained I was.

The day arrived, and I waited nervously. Kevin, the workman, showed his appreciation a the bathroom being cleared, saying most are not and the first thing he has to do normally is clear it all away himself.

Tuesday 31st May 2016. Day One

The man, Kevin did all his work on his own throughout, up until his work was finished and the electricians attacked my flat later.

He showed care, consideration and kindness during their stated 4-day operation, even afterwards on the many more day it turned out he needed.

The bloke liked strong tea and caramelised biscuits, wanted the UK to leave the Euro, was sociable and kept me up to date with what was going on and future plans, and he was interested in photography too!

Wednesday 1st June 2016. Day Two

Bath out, pipes blocked off and tool in ready for further work!

He was a grafter too. He soon had up the tiles and got his stuff in to build a wooden frame, presumably, it was to contain the shower rail area?

The bath was out in no time.

I kept plying him with strong tea with demerara sugar and caramelised biscuits. Good job I had a fair stock in.

He shown interest in the smells coming from the slow cooking with its seasoned vegetables in stock, and even noted down the recipe as he left for the day! I asked him if he’s like to try some of my seaweed, but wouldn’t risk it. Hehe! He even found times for the odd times for a little chinwag.

Thursday 2nd June 2016. Day Three

Getting a bit fed-up with the twice daily rigmarole of having to get all the stuff for my ablutions out of the spare room and into the kitchen, standing in bowl of Radox and Dettol for me feet to cleanse, while shaving then stand-up washing, of my more than amply adequate flobby body and cleaning me teggies. Then medicating the areas needing medicating, and putting everything back away again. Then getting it out…

This Thursday I had to go out for my blood tests that fell at the same time as my social hour, so I had to miss that, cause Dean Walker, the sex-pot coordinator of the flats came to do the tenants interview.

0805hrs: Kevin the maintenance man, arrived, made him a cuppa, and we had a chinwag. He set to working.

Deana Walker came to do the tenants interview with me.

I hobbled to the doctors. Got some shopping and returned to the flat. Trevor had gone by then, I trusted him and had given him a key to use to let himself in and out.

Trev had been hard at it making the frame that it now seems, will hold the wall tile from the actual wall.

So I missed some of the noise of his electric sawing today.

He warned me yesterday that Friday would be the drilling of the floor day.

He’d done a lot more work again and had gone home before I got back. All clean and tidy.

Friday 3rd June 2016. Day Four

20 2 304 4

Trev arrived, had a cuppa and bickie and set to work with a vengeance.

Soon he appeared at the living room door, with his face mask, hearing defenders and gloves on, to warn me about the upcoming noise and dust. He disappeared into the shower room and closed the door to help keep the dust from spreading a bit.

304 4 304 2

20 2 Trev had got the floor drain installed, covered it temporarily and had readied the floor for the floor men to arrive next week.

He tried, but could not get a day and time for me, despite his many calls to try to.

Nice chap.

Saturday and Sunday Days Five & Six

I only titivated the place, as we were also expecting the electricians sometime next week, and were both aware of what to expect with them to clean up after them. A thing coating of dust had covered everywhere, as is to be expected.

Monday 6th June 2016. Day Seven

304 Electricians expected today, Kevin though.

He had his cuppa and biscuits and got on with the job again as usual. He posed proudly at the nearly finished wall tiles when he’d done for the day.

Nice to see a pride in someone’s workmanship.

Only one more day to go working here for Kevin now.

He took some photos for me to use later, with his posh camera and showed me some of the options on it. I may be tempted to get one later. But I’ve got to sort out and get some shower furniture when it’s all done, cause the cabinets I used in the bathroom will I think, be too wide for the available space between the water power box and the actual shower and will get soaked as well as be hard to get to. Huh!

Tuesday 7th June 2016. Day Eight

Trevor arrived but did not know when the electrician would be arriving, if at all. I went to ask Julie or Deana if they could find out, they couldn’t. I left.

Clinic day today. Waiting for the electricians to arrive.

On the laptop hours later before going out and I made a brew and took one for Trevor, the electricians had arrived, not introduced themselves at all and had started working?

Working away at making sure the carpet had bits of cut-off wire and plastic from I don’t know where, dust twinkling bits of metal, streak marks down the paintwork, chips of plaster off the corners in the hallway.

I took a surprise photo of them, that didn’t please them at all. The younger one said: “Wot yer doing?” Which is more than the older said for hours, he didn’t talk to me!

I went to see Deana about the double electricity bill I’d had delivered, one saying New Account and I owed them £289! The other one was right and showed me direct debits paid?

She was very busy but kindly dealt with it for me.

They, (British Gas, the French-owned company) told her I had two meters installed??? There isn’t room for two meters in the cupboards where the are kept, even if I did want to have two? They kept her waiting so long with tubed music in between and passing her to other departments, she told them to ring her back. She said she would let me know the result.

Later, just after Trevor had said his farewells, Deana called to say that British Gas who supply the electricity are cancelling the second bill. I thanked her muchly.

I went out to the clinic and when I returned the ‘sparkies’ had gone. The rubbish they made, they had left behind for me, mind.

A double light switch that looked second hand to me. (Above) They decorated the carpet nicely. Trevor had left the bathroom… sorry, shower room all ready for the arrival of the floor layer men.

Electricians placed the new power switch on the hallway wall, that was conveniently placed at a level with my glasses and nose, just in case I wanted to walk into it… Yes, I did!

Wednesday 8th June 2016. Day Ten

I had a lot of running around to do and no one had arrived before I went out. When I returned, the place looked like it did when I left?

Closer inspection I found the headphones were stuck under the recliner. The phone in the hallway was not on the stand properly, and some new bits of dust and wires were on the corner near the door?

No one know who it was that came in?

Might have been the electricians or the floor men? Still, no problem.

Thursday 9th June 2016. Day Eleven

The floor people had not been by the time I had to go out back to the surgery, so I left the note about calling Deana on the door again.

I returned many hours later to find the door unlocked. A few telltale bits of dust and the panelling with a new scratch on it near the shower room door were noted, and I opened the door to have a look in:

The floor had been done. But dare I use the WC by walking on the floor, no! I remembered being told it will need a day or two after completion before it was safe to use the shower, but could I walk on it?

I could not find anyone to ask.

Friday 10th June 2016. Day Twelve

Another search to get help or guidance on if, and or when it will be allowed to have a heavy-duty movement and or shower…

No answers to phone calls or emails.

Well, it is Friday, early finish day for Council Workers innit!

Looks like Monday then before I can use the shower.