Depression – Page 54 – Inchie Today

Incommoded Inchy: Tuesday 16th July 2024

This doesn’t bode well, does it?
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Good Morning Each!

I lost my District Nurse for the leg ulcer and Lymphorrhoea Leslie. Last call today. The wound has healed. Damn it! Another bright highlight is lost to the misery of my existence. The pain was worth it to get some company in the flat. Still, they will call to tend to the Catheter contraption every few weeks. So all is not lost company-wise.
I got an unexpected Iceland order today. I cannot recall making one at all. To make things worse, I’d just made one for Friday!
The ablutions again took me an age. Nearly three hours. Of course, after that, I forgot what I was doing and got terribly confused. When I returned to the computer, I proceeded to open the wrong blog and lost hours again before I realised I was working on an old one. Then, I made a mess of transferring it back to the original blog, and even more hours evaporated while trying to get it right again. I fear it may contain some errors, mistakes and cock-ups. I even made a mess of the Ode and had to touch it up… but now I find I’ve reposted the graphic with the mistakes still on it.
Condemnatory self-loathing combined with a frustration of mega-proportions followed. There is no doubt about it: & They are winning the battle to control my mind. They are increasing cock-ups daily and creating a feeling of pointlessness in life. Along with my financial bewilderment, my frustration grows deeper. The pointlessness I feel now is prompted by my inability to counter these at-the-moment problems and knowing they will only worsen. It’s the same with , & dying-off. It ain’t gonna get any better.
All this created a counter-opinion, and I feel shame complaining to myself. Obviously, (to me), I must deserve this misery. My past actions, maybe? I am just hoping that someone in the medical world reads this blog and can conjure up some compassion and help me to cope. Hahaha!
Enough of this self-pitying! At least, although a struggle time-wise, I can somehow produce the odd decent ode. Even if this blog is reduced to just an ode a day. Inevitable eventually, what with taking me three hours to get the ablutions done, and all the time spent correcting errors, the tumbles and stumbles, my camera using problems, my memory being unreliable, the catheter pains, Leg dances, my eyes fading, lack of hearing so bad I can’t hear the intercom, fire-alarm, door chime or water leak alarm. I’m guessing what people are saying. And the unwanted Dark-Dank-Depressions after each related incident, yet I still love doing this blog & ode. So, as long as I can, I will, even in cut-down form. I love reading other folks’ blogs and receiving and answering comments on mine. It’s my social life. And I do appreciate it. I can’t help it; I’m addicted! Now, where are my Codeines? Hehehe! Another minimalistic set of unreadable notes to refer to. It’s a good job that I took some Kodak Tim photographs to help me recall things. But it is now tomorrow, and my recollections needed some help. I’m getting things so mixed up lately. My concentration and eyesight are getting worse earlier each day.

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The nocturnal catheter pouch was removed, and the day pouch connected. At the same time, a little naughty, disapproving language was spoken to the painful . Which seemed to get them more irritated. Tsk!

I got the three waste bags made into one and placed it near the front door. I then had an
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I didn’t need to struggle to remember this incident! I hit my poor left foot’s toe as I turned around to return to the mini-hallway. Arrgh!
Even considering what was about the Cartilage girls and what was about to happen in the wetroom, this remains the single most painful experience of the day!

I hobbled to the kitchenette and took some non-prescription painkillers. Taking this photo of the view from the window. Still cursing for stubbing my toe!

I got on the computer to start the graphic for the ode of the day. To my Utter Dismay, the alignment options in the WordPress Gallery had a blank icon for the No Alignment choice box! Has anyone else gotten this new error from their WordPress? All is not lost. Pressing the blank rectangle still makes the graphic or photo non-alignment. Good innit? WordPress!

Five cube-shaped articles plonked into the WC. Followed by a short hailing of following up. I got the feeling that I had better not stand up yet. A good job, too! For a second wave from , heavier than his first, flowed… well splattered, freely. I think I was lucky here.

I cleaned and cleared up after the double-entendered evacuation. And did the teggies.
Then, the potentially dangerous job of shaving was tackled. Five bloody cuts, and a later by around ten minutes, I gave up trying to stop the flow of the red stuff on my cheek and nose. The Brut was not working this morning. This called for the strong stuff! I got the tube of cream that I used for Little Inchies Fungal lesions and dabbed some on the stubborn face cut. I’m so glad I didn’t jump any higher than I did, or else my head may have gone through the concrete ceiling into the above flats’ wet room! Well, it felt like it! I put a plaster with some Dettol on the ultra-tiny cut. Then I had another jump! Hehehe! But it did the trick for a while and stopped the flow.
Then, yet another farce: getting the fresh PPs on. It was all the same hassle and pain as yesterday’s attempt, but it took longer to get them on today. I’m not sure why, really. Silly me! Obviously (now I think of it), were hurting me far more today. It was another record length of time to get the job done.

I got back to my blogging duties, and the intercom sounded. It was a food order from Iceland. And did I make one only yesterday for next Friday? Indeed, there was an error somewhere. As I accepted the bags kindly dropped in the doorway for me by the driver, it was clear from the contents that this was indeed my order. The 2 extra large Lamb Shanks confirmed this. I got the things stored away, and what a job this was! After loading it up, I thought I heard the fridge creaking. Hehehe! I was pleased to see that I had some more pod peas in there, and they will be eaten up with a lamb shank & gravy, with some roast potato cubes!
Iceland had substituted some items again! Don’t think that this angered me, made me spit, or got me feeling all pissed off. Well… yeah, I did!
A few drops of rain when I eventually opened the curtains and took these belated morning shots of the view from the balcony.
The mudslide was somewhat intrusive this morning; well, it’s lunchtime now.

The Cartilage Girls continue to give me some pain. In fact, not that I’ve done a lot of hobbling about. Cartilage Chloe once and Cartilage Carole twice gave way on me. But thankfully, there have been no tumbles. I’ve been Tumble-Free all day up to now!

Carer Sam called belatedly. They are doing their best. Obviously, they have problems just as we do. No bother.

I launched myself most belatedly at the blog updating.

District Nurse Sarah (I think it was) came in to check over the burst ulcer from the burn and Diabetic Edema. She called for advice, and they agreed that this is as much as is needed with the diabetic bandaging. The ulcers on both of my ankles are leak-free now, but I’ll miss them calling on me.
I didn’t cry too much! Haha!

I started shelling the pod peas in preparation for the meal preparations. Quite a few of them got into the bowl, but many amazingly just jumped into my mouth. I can’t understand it.
These lamb shanks are easy to cook in the bag. I later dropped the peas in the water to cook.
On a low boil, they take only 30 minutes to cook this way.
I then sorted the potato cubes from the Asda bag from the freezer. Remove the ones with any black spots on them. Which was about 25% in total. And got them cooking on a tray in the oven.
After a while, Carer Sam arrived. Medicated me, and then I went to check on the now-burnt potatoes. I picked through them to remove the too-hard ones and those with the black spots I missed and got them in a dish to add later.
What a feast!
Thoroughly enjoyed it, apart from some of the burnt spuds being too hard for my shortage of teeth and the few remaining being in the sad, broken, painful state. It was almost, but not fully worth the pain afterwards from .

I had planned to get back on the blog, but fading eyesight and increasing tiredness forced me to stop everything and just sit down in itch-creating, bruise-giving, catheter-tube-tugging, crumb-decorated from my nocturnal nibbling, God-awfully uncomfortable, cringingly grotty, no longer working, dirty beige, anti-sleep designed, c1966, second-hand bought for £300 ten years ago from the charity shop, recliner.
I turned on the TV and just fell asleep. It was heaven!
Carer Chris came, and I cannot recall much of this visit. I think he… well, no, I don’t know.
Later, Christopher called for a late visit, and I still slept. I can recall him taking off the one sock I had on. In the morning, I found it crumpled up on the ottoman. He must have put the catheter night bag on for me.

I continued to sleep without any problems. Having the longest-ever kip for months! I suppose I needed it?
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Please try to be happy,
Content, surrounded by magnanimity,
Ousing with loveability & affinity,
Wallow in moving mutuality,
This sounds good to me!
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Keep Safe!
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Incontinent Inchy: Monday 15th July 2024

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04:25hrs: I begrudgingly heaved and hauled my overweight, blubbery body from the bed. I even thought of getting back in it as Cartilages Carole & Chloe kicked off the moment I put my colossal weight on the knees.
I bent to release the nocturnal catheter pouch. The bag was a little fuller this morning, considering I’d only been in bed for about four hours. Yesterday’s not being a happy laddie lingering into today. There I was, sitting on the Throne, having a go at the crossword puzzle book, just seeing if I get some answers to the many not-finished ones over the months. I
counted the cracks I could see on the ceiling. It amazes me how I seem to get a different number each time. And I suppose. 23 today. The first long, deep brown torpedo escaped painfully, followed immediately by splatterings from . The end loose evacuated product was once again of a Kharki hue, small and wet but lumpy. Well, it made a change for me. Haha!
The were tackled next. Starting with the hurtful, bleeding-again teggies. Then, the extremities needed cleaning in preparation for the medicationings. These were done before the shaving this morning. Another first for me is that I’ve always done the shaving first, but not today. I’ve no idea why. One good thing about having the diabetic socks and the compression bandaging on both legs is that I can’t clean them, so one job is saved. Also, I do not need to medicate the leg ulcers or ingrowing toenails.
Were Germoloided once things had dried from the washing of the bottie. I found that I’d run out of the anti-fungal cream for Little Inchies cream. So I tried some Germolene to see if that eased it a bit.
It didn’t help, but it didn’t make things any worse, either.
I got the Derma cream under the arms, man breasts and forehead, which was silly because I’d not done the shaving yet. Tsk!
Then moved on and gave a good rubbing in of the Phorpain gel to both knees. To ease the pain from , and . Next, I got the olive oiling done down both earholes. Had a bit of an then. I dropped the dropper bottle and lost even more time cleaning the mess I made up. But worse, all the bending to retrieve the olive oil from the mat and floor, set the Cartilage gals, Arthur Itis and off. I then performed a short but natty, nasty version of a , which made me wobble and joined the list of injuries. And I hadn’t even tackled the dangerous parts of shaving and getting dressed yet!
Still, being of excellent pain tolerance, a twerp, and so brave with it, it didn’t worry in the least, not one bit! But I assume you already knew that?
Then , the costly Cataract Blepharitis application process had to be done. The spray is no bother, but the drops I just can’t hold my hands steady enough to get it in right. Doing the pads is okay. Then, I waited for the regulation for 5 minutes and wiped it all off again from the eyelids. I would estimate the cost of liquid I missed the eye with that ran down into my mouth and onto my testicles from my chin, not to mention poor Little Inchie; it must have been about £10 worth every day I do this.
Now, the shaving needs to be done. I wondered how long I’d already spent doing the ablutions. I reckon I was already over two hours and still had to shave and dress.
The shaving was cutless! Yes! But getting the PPs on more than made up for my good luck with the shaving.
With either knee being liable to give way, my left leg is so painful to lift up.
Always a risk and or possibility.
On routine, I set about the tried, tested, but often failing ‘get-the-pants’. I wedged my rear end against the sink, with at hand, and of course,
the small Plastic Pickerupper Paul. I was gobsmacked at how easily I got my right foot in the pants. Might not be so bad, I thought to myself… What a plonker!
I all but went over when I first tried to lift the left leg up high enough to get the foot in the pants. On about my third attempt, I was getting frustrated, to say the least. Not necessarily because I couldn’t get the foot in; this is a regular problem, but with the pain I was going through trying to!
I tried one last time and was prepared that the pants would stay off if this did not work! Which, of course, is not on if Little Inchies fungal Lesion bleeds, as it often does, hence the PPs in the first place; it could be bloody and embarrassing if a Carer or nurse was here when it flowed down my legs, over the catheter bag and pouch, onto my foot and then the carpet!
There’s no other word for this; Lifting the leg with one hand holding the sink and the other with a picker-upperer and the walking stick was bloody painful! One final effort, a grimace, a few curses and both legs were in!
I was shattered! Aching all over. I felt like I’d been up for hours; in reality, it was about three hours of angst and pain, but at last, it was all over… until the morning, it’ll start over again!
Painkillers and some anti diarrhoea capsules were taken!
I actually chirped up a little later, Yes! Then again, I usually do if get on the computer, and even more so when the eyes are as clear as they can be, and I can see the keyboard and the letters. But at the back of my demented brain, I know that come midday, the double vision will return. (It did)

Carer Richard arrived minutes after I turned on the computer. I patiently waited for CorelDraw to load up —no, that’s another fib. Richard got the medications sorted out, but I forgot to ask him to take of the diabetic sock, so it will have to stay on until tonight when a Carer can take it off if I remember to ask him or her. I bet it reeks a bit!
I put the kettle on and sorted the waste bags into one. I left it near the door.
I returned to the computer and steadily progressed with the extra blog of old cartoons blog. Then, a sudden… well, fear came over me. Had I left the hot water tap running again? I hobbled hastily to check.
All was okay. After yesterday’s farcical, imbecilic three times of letting the tap run cold, my confidence was at a low ebb. I checked several times today, but up until now, I have not left the hot water tap (faucet) running. At least today, I got a wash and shave with hot water available. Despite spending nearly four hours in the wet room in agony, at least I got the cleaning and medicating done.
I had a mammoth, or maybe it was one of . Or perhaps I fell asleep on the computer? Up to now, I’ve only had two !

The sun did its best to get through today, but it couldn’t do it just like yesterday.
I took this shot through the kitchenette windows.
I made a brew of Thompson’s Punjana tea. I never got around to making one earlier.
I took the brew to my beloved but poorly computer and digested some of my favourite biscuits via a good dunking. Haha!
I like Yeo Valley organic milk and have tried it a few times. As instructed by the Doctor, I’m keeping within her demands that I have only two mugs of tea a day.

Arrived. A nice young gal. Showed concern at my wobbly walking. I explained the ablution episode and showed her a photo of yesterday’s burnt meal and saucepan. She did laugh!
I found some potatoes in the only saucepan I had left. Humph! They were well seasoned with sea salt, pungent soy sauce and a drop of vinegar to eat later.

Great balls of fire!
The bag tore off of the catheter pouch; it was so full!!! It had filled up so quickly.
It’s a darned good job that Carer Kara keeps a supply in stock for me.

Now I’ll have to pack up on the blogging. My vision is getting much worse.
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Back to finish off in the morning – I hope!

I’m back…
Carer Chris arrived. Tucked into the nibbles and drinkies, but he was in a rush, poor lad.
He turned down the heat on the oven. And I watched part of one episode of the old Heartbeat on the resistance to making a link, unwanted and needed, overpriced Virgin Media fibre TV.

I had a pastie, potatoes, and sliced fresh tomatoes for my meal of the day.
Followed by a naughty but nice Lemon and cream Bliss.

I took this late shot while washing the pots and settled to get some sleep. It took me hours to nod off, yet my body and mind were worn out.

Tired? Me? YES!

TTFN each. 🤔
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Implausable Inchy: Saturday 13th July 2024

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I’ll not mess about… Today started pretty well.
The Computer Froze. Somehow, I got it back on after the dreaded blue screen appeared. I pressed on with the blogging. The SD reader stopped working, and I spent hours not knowing what I was doing and getting so upset that Duodenal Donald kicked off for the first time in weeks! The Peptac was guzzled a lot after this started. It does no good, psychologically it may?

Then, both websites froze, including Google and Firefox.
I’d already lost hours on the first two disasters. I was lost on what to do with this one and thought it was the end.
I turned off the computer and then went back on again. I then got another dreaded MS blue screen. I was offered four options. But they may as well have been written in Outer Mongolian, from what I could glean or understand. Only the ‘Turn-Off Your Computer’ was decipherable. So I did. Really pissed off now. Even almost angry. I had a vision of me going into the fire at my cremation and waking up – such is my rotten, unbelievable luck.
I decided to get a wash and shower. Carer Chris came, and I got off track to give him his weekly treats for his son, as he’s off for two days. Medications, one diabetic sock on, and I bade him farewell and a good rest.
I went to the wet room for a good shave and shower, only to find that the hot water faucet had run cold! I remembered putting last night’s dishes in the sink to soak—then that, you know, sort of tightness of realisation in the stomach hit me en route to check to see if I’d left the hot tap running. I Had!
When Carer Joanne called, she didn’t look very well. But was kind enough to tell me some problems, with advice for me, with her Catheter, and I was having similar trouble. We were united in our sufferings. ♥
The JS order arrived, and the Low-Cost Food order arrived an hour or so later. The JS driver kindly put the things into boxes and bags for me, and bless her with cotton socks. ♥ Despite all the hassle of the day so far, I was pleased with some lemon wafer biscuits from the Low-Cost shop. And the adorable Vegan Maryland Cookies came from J Sainsbury. Now I have my three favourite nibbles to hand, and being depressed, lots of them were soon my tummy! I got a lot of bother from …serves me for being greedy.
Paracetamol & Codeines were taken. And no sooner, started electrocuting me. Bad enough, but she’s been at it now for eight hours on & off!
I got some peas shelled t have with the beef pie and potatoes later on. But was concerned about not getting the blog done. So, I ventured to the computer desk, smelling my unwashed B.O., as I prayed 🙏🏻 for the SD Card thingy to work and Google or Firefox to work again, and got the computer on.
Hallelujah! 👍 Or at least partly, the browser was working again, but the SD card reader wasn’t interested.
About four hours later, I tried another reader, but that did not work. So, I took out the leads one at a time and returned them. About the 11th, the lead was returned, and Bejesus, the reader, worked! Now it’s getting dark, I’m drained, and my eyes are getting worse. Just thought I’d mention it. I’ve been up for over 18 hours and still only just started this blog. I had to get the photos on CorelDraw to save them to file… and I know this sounds impossible – But CorelDraw Crashed!
Luckily, this costly, incompetent art package does a lot of crashing, so I can remember what and how to go through the salvation process several times a week. But it cost me the most valuable thing after my health and wealth loss: my precious time. And I’m not in a good mood now. However, I shall continue into the morning to get caught up. ,

Well, it is well past time to get summat to eat,
See you later… if I can wake up in the morning. Haha!

It is Sunday morning now, and I am still well behind with this blog, with a lot of catching up to do. But, first, I had difficulty forcing myself to get up. After a terrible night of broken sleep. On with the blogging photographs…

Dark again.

Beautiful tree copse and bottom field,

Treats packed up.

Waste bags sorted.

Say no more…

Later kitchen window view.

JS order arrived.
Got the stuff away.
Ready-made meals and fresh garden peas.

Low Cost Food order.

Thompson’s Punjana brew.

Hours & hours lost with MS Windows, computer and CorelDraw difficulties. Deep Dank, Dark Depressions!

Ah, a nice shot here.

I started shelling some pod peas to go in with the ready meal of Cottage pie.
Got on a slow boil-simmer.

Went to get the fodder served up.
The rain was back!

Baked potatoes are on the left of the tray, and gorgeously tasty Flora No-Butter, butter, and podded peas are added.
Cottage pie with some Hammonds sauce on top.
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We Need Peace

Peace to all, deserving or not…
Peace; Very little have we got,
Thanks to the Oligarchy lot,
Their fortune made is misbegot!
Peace? The chance is a longshot,
For peace, we can scheme and plot…
Putin prefers a riot…
But not amongst his own lot,
Anyone else is liable to get shot,
Peace is needed, but who gives a jot?
Find Peace? Humankind cannot!
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TTFN

Incogitable Inchy: Friday 12th July 2024

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Today, I could have done without it.
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It had to happen, I suppose, but I woke up. In the state of mind & body as described above – feeling crap! Uninterested in even trying to sort out the state my mind was in. The overriding guilt within. The… Oh, I said all this above. I’m sorry about that. A little more urine in my nocturnal pouch this morning, and still a bit dark in colour with signs of blood in it. But it didn’t bother me at that moment; What did get to me was the message of gloom from my EQ. Things would not go right today. (As if I didn’t know this already! It’s the same every day here in the slammer for me. Even what should have been a joyful event the other day, in getting an appointment with the opticians, just had to have ifs, buts, maybes and uncertainties about it. Not to mention that it’s costing me nearly £100 for them to just come to the flat. How much is needed for eye testing is a secret as of yet. And the date was a fortnight later. A protem time and date were given to Carer Kara.
I slowly rose from the world’s most uncomfortable bed, trod on the torch I must have knocked off the side table, and cursed mildly. This was followed by a realisation that a depression was brewing, and I tried to fight it off, all the same. Seeing the red bits in the sky, I fetched Kodak Tim to take some blotched pictures of the morning view. Had I not felt so low, I would have stood a while talking to the clouds… Yes, I talk to them and the trees, you know. Well, it’s a bit of company for me. But not this time, for the gurgling from within and the wind from the rear end was getting out, so and me wobbled along to the wet room. As I sat there, many of the usual ailments that didn’t seem too bad yesterday kicked off. Curiously, for only the second time ever, as I washed my body after the evacuation, I felt the dum-dumming of the mechanical Aorta valve beating away. At least It confirmed that I was alive, but I didn’t get too excited about it.

I made a brew of Thompson’s Punjana. And got the computer going. And I instantly cheered up. (Not for long, of course, but there you are!) The eyes were far improved on their condition last night. Why remains a mystery. So, I committed myself to finishing yesterday’s blog before the sight faded. It was a great time for an hour or two, and happiness almost thought about the possibility of breaking out. Silly, I know!
Carer Maryham arrived. I stopped computing, and she put on the diabetic sock for me. She handed me the medications, remembering to give me the Vit K one. Maryham had to dash off; she was busy this Friday morning.

I forgot about the blogging, so I sorted the waste bin bags into one and took them to the front door for collection.

I got the camera and took another sky view photograph. Blotches included, of course. The sun is having a job getting through again this morning. I could hardly believe it was July, with things being so cold and dark. Brrr! In fact, I was sneezing a bit.
Back to the computer… it had to happen; it always does, every day. !
I was loading the snaps for Blotchy Kodak Tim, and the machine would not let me import the SD card content for some unknown reason. The feeling of doom and gloom returned just as Carer Joanne came in. She identified my frame of mind immediately and asked what the matter was. I think she regretted it because I told her. Hahaha! I kept her waiting a few minutes while I tried and failed to get the photos. Last night, as I closed it, I updated the MS on the computer. Mmm?
Carer Christopher arrived. As he was sorting the medications, my super-new, old Nokia
The phone went berserk with text messages coming in. After three, I got a recorded voicemail. They were all supposedly from Lloyds Bank. Chris listened to the recorded message and said it was a scam. These were followed by four more messages. I think they were all the same ones repeated, but not confident as I cannot see well enough to read them now that my eyes are failing again. I could not hear the recorded messages, but Chris confirmed after taking the mobile phone that they claimed to be from Lloyds Bank. Chris said the texts gave me a passcode to log on to my Lloyds account, which I do not have. But I panicked a bit. I wanted to delete them. I asked if Kara was in today, if she had not gone home yet, and if she might take a look at them. So, I didn’t delete them yet. There was a telephone number to ring for assistance. But I was wary enough to ignore it. Obviously, my finance helper Kara was not available. So, I’m in a state and a bit of a pickle. What next! I thought back to this morning’s awakening thoughts from my EQ. He was right again!
Getting murky early tonight.
Well, packing up, as the eyes seem to insist. But a little later on in the day today, which gives signs of hope, methinks.
Going to get some nosh. Back in the morning… I hope.
TTFNski…

I’M BACK…
Two crisp fishcakes without any fish (don’t ask), six potato rostis burnt to perfection, and a can of peas and sweetcorn. A pot of orange jelly to follow. I ate it all up and had a bag of Frazzles.

The photo on the left was taken from the kitchenette window. Well, this came out different, didn’t it? Heaven knows what I did wrong. Tsk!

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The party is over, not that I was invited,
With my mind & body so blighted,
And struggling, being so poorly sighted,
I got through another day – I’m delighted!
Facing another, I expect it will be addlepatted!
Hopes and plans to be thwarted,
Accifauxpas ridden, unpremeditated,
My computer crashed, problems unpropitiated,
And it’s over 60 years since I mated!
Huh!

TTFN

Incoercible Inchy: Thursday 11th July 2024

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Possibly my most confusing day for weeks now.
In and out of control of things and happenings.
One late morning and Gawd knows how many more throughout the day.
I can’t recall being in such confusion for a long time.
I found out later that I’d placed an order for J Sainsbury. But it’s all a mystery to me. Looking at what I ordered really made me wonder how the hell, why, and when I made it.
I can’t help but occasionally worry about it and myself.

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It’s too dark yet again. It usually clears a bit later.

Taken while getting the Nocturnal Cather Pouch unattached. The white spot is the flash from Kodak Tim.

Made up a waste bag and hoovered around the main room. It’s that Inchy, you know, forever dropping crumbs, pens, torches, mobile phones (when he can find them), and anything else that is not attached to him is droppable, really.

Ablutions, medications & Porcelain Throne Visit(s)
I carried out another Whoopsiedangleplop after the first painful use of the Porcelain Throne – I forgot all about, or maybe I might have thought I’d done it, the shaving!
As with yesterday’s first attempt, the movement was showing no signs of any interest in escaping the depths of my heavily fabbed body and innards.
So, I got the crossword book out. Flipped it open and started on the random one. I also got a few answers; I got two more answers anyway. Then, the pain started, which again caught me by surprise. All the signs were that it was going to be a Trotsky effort. To take my mind off the pain, I counted the cracks on the wet room ceiling for a while. There were 27 cracks up there, I think. The pain suddenly reached a crescendo, and a tear came to my eyes; I gritted the few teeth I had left in my mouth, cringed and anticipated that a lot of blood would need cleaning up when it finally arrived. As it almost shot out, the pain eased, and the plump, plump… plumps were heard as the almost cube-shaped giant, Kharki-coloured Oxo cubes hit the water – to be followed by what I thought would have been the first things to exit… Whoosh, splatter, all done! I reckon it was controlled by 15% of Constipation Conrad; the rest was definitely a Trotsky Terence follow-through. This horrendous evacuation may have helped me forget I’d not shaved.
The medicationalisationing went tremendously well! Getting the PPs on was not so easy. With the assistance of the small pick-upper I keep in the wet room and sticking my butt in the corner near the door for support, I was pleased with how I got the right leg in the pants so comfortably.
I had to lift my left leg with my left arm to get it high enough to go into the leg hole of the pants, keeping the pick-upper in the same hand to pull at the pants to get my foot in. One second, I was struggling to keep my balance. The next second, I clumped down onto the floor on my knees. This upset, , , and in both knees, they let me know their discomfort in the usual fashion. Arrgh! didn’t seem too bothered by my tumble. This shows he’s healing up a bit.
Even crawling on all fours to the recliner to regain my feet was almost tolerable pain-wise. It took great effort to clamber up on the £300 second-hand shop-purchased, c1966, welt-causing, uncomfortable, not-working, itch-inspirational, crumb-containing recliner. I stayed there for a minute or two. As I grabbed , I’d left in the wet room and rose gingerly from the chair. Carer Christopher arrived. He seemed in a light mood, bless him. He got the one diabetic sock on and medicated me fully.
I decided a brew of Thompson’s Punjana was in order. I limped, with surprisingly little pain, to the kitchenette. I took this Kodak Tim of the grim view on offer. I think the sun will struggle to get through today. As usual, my eyes were much better in the morning than in the afternoon. So I made a mug of tea and pressed on with yesterday’s blog while I could see well enough. By 10:30hrs, the double shadows started to kick in. Krunglebumps! But I did get the blog finished and posted.

FLAT FIRE ALARM: I forgot to mention in yesterday’s blog that the Fire Alarm went off. This was the first time it had activated since they installed the new, louder one, and I did not hear the old one when it was activated. I had a hobble around to check things in the other rooms, but all looked well. I imagine it must have been a test. Because no brigade or staff members had arrived to check things out. They may have changed the day of the tests. When I could get about, any changes used to be amended on the notice board in the foyer.

The new nightshirt was delivered. I got it hung up to get into later when I’d shaved. Carer Kara visited me. She opened yesterday’s mail, both letters were from the bank. Nowt to fret over, she said. She asked how I was feeling and checked the catheter bag. Kara kindly took the laundry bag down with her.

I returned to the wet room, determined not to have any more tumbles, to get the shave I forgot about earlier done. I had a Porcelain Throne Mark2 visit. No chinks this time, straight to the slushiness if a regular heavily Trotsky Terence commanded evacuation.
Well, at least I get diverse, multifaceted, distinct evacuations. Hehe!
Then, I tackled the shaving. There was just one tiny cut, nothing to bother about. It took me much longer than planned because I couldn’t find my spectacles after getting on the new nightshirt. (I found them later)

My eyes are fading now. I’ll make a meal while I can do it a little more safely before the eyes get worse.

It’s not a bad effort visually. But the beef and I found both bits of it between the grizzled and fat, was disappointing, as was the so-called gravy. So much for ready-made meals!
Thankfully, the potatoes that I baked to accompany it were superb. They were seasoned with black pepper and some of the adorable No-butter butter, but even this did not fill me.
So I backed up the sad-tasting but good-looking meal by delving into my favourite biscuit box! Vegan cookies and Lemon Tartlets. They were nice!

Carer Christopher arrived. He took off my one diabetic sock. Dealt out the medications, and then I asked him to take a photo of me in the new nightshirt.
Chris took a few snaps, this one on the right being a first in many ways.
① The first shot of me wearing the new nightshirt. ② The first picture I’ve ever looked at and expounded a loud exclamation; “Arghhh, look at the size of that belly!” ③ And most uniquely, this is the only time anyone has caught me having two of my shakes on camera simultaneously. Bearing in mind that they are rare and usually do not last for more than a minute makes this all the more remarkable. I ought to be in the medical Gazette! Hehe!

I can hardly recall the details of Carer Chris’s last call. He woke me up but was in no mood to be activated. As for her leader, she never stops her bemusing, irritating meddling with the synapses and memory cells. is to blame overall, I think. But I could be wrong, of course. Perhaps failing was involved in the brain invaders’ plot to send me into another world of confusion. For all I know… which is more guesses than estimates.

May Peace & Contentment surround you

TTFN.

Incidental Inchy: Wednesday 10th July 2024

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At 03:30 hrs, an electric shock woke me. I did notice as I lay there thinking of getting up, or at least the possibility of this, that the nocturnal catheter back had next to nothing in it. Then nodded off again. I stirred again back into mock-life around 05:00 hrs and was glad I did. The memory box had sent me a message that ‘we’ must get the ablutions done before anyone arrives. Not that I needed this thought prompt; the moment I whiffed my BO was enough to trigger me into frantic action.
I rolled off the bed, stood leaning on the bed bar, wobbling for a few seconds, and then carried out the catching-my-balance routine. Which took at least three minutes of strenuous exercise. Hehe!
I considered doing a few press-ups, toes and a bit of shadow boxing, but the protection pants had come down and were hanging on the compression bandaging, and that caused me to forget about the physical jerks. It was true about the pants, though. Tsk!
I got a dressing gown on, and the innards instructed me to go to the Porcelain Throne. So, I did. The evacuation was a half & half-style. It took a lot of effort to get anything moving. And not a little pain. I was convinced that Constipation Conrad was back in charge of the action. Thinking that this would take some time, I got the crossword book and started having a go at it. I was doing well, as well. Then came the rapid splurge of liquid evacuating; it was all over in seconds. Unfortunately, the mess it sprayed all over took me ages to clean up. There’s always summat goes wrong! And I’d only been up for 10 or thereabouts minutes! Then the morning ablutioning and medications were started.

I got the too-large PPs off and cleaned my lower regions first. Medicated poor old , and Germoloided the piles. Washed my torso; it’s not easy for me, you know! All that blubber around the middle and the getting gigantic man breasts, a hell of a painful job getting to things. Applied the barrier cream around my goolies, under my man breasts and armpits. Cleaned what few teeth I could find left in the mouth. And started shaving. Astoundingly… I thought I’d not have a single nick shaving. , but I should have known better than getting cocky. As I applied the Brut aftershave to my face and body and sprayed the gargantuan mass around my bones and belly, I caught my , knocking it over. I hit my head as I bent down on the sink and simultaneously stubbed my toe as I began to get up from lifting Mickey.
Of course, this didn’t bother me in the slightest.

I got on the computer and am new to this site. Carer Evelyn arrived. She issued the prescription medications, and Evelyn swapped the diabetic socks for me. I asked her to take the laundry down for me. Nice gal. But after she’d gone, the laundry bag was still there. Not to fret, she said she was doing the next call as well, as long as I remember to ask her again.

Onto yesterday’s blog catching-up. It was slow-going as the eyes began to play up with the double and treble visions again. It looks like the sun may come out later.

Carer Kara came to do the financials for me. She went through my emails and opened the letters I could not read. Things seemed okayish. She then kindly told me that the doctor’s surgery had rang her back about the problems with my eyes. I have to have my eyes tested first with an optician. Then, get a report on them from the surgery. Then, the doctor might refer me to the EENT for another operation on the Cataract and Glaucoma… or at least get me on the list for them. I waited 2 years for the last operation that didn’t work. My eyes are worse than they were before the procedure. Humph!
Kara then called an optician who does home calls. The lady she spoke to said the home eye test would cost me £90.
They will call Kara back after giving us a temporary date without a time of day for the visit and determining whether they can fill it. Kara put the date on the Google calendar for me. July 2nd. Carer Kara is as good as gold.
I’m not chuffed with it, but it has got to be done.

Carer Evelyn, the washing has still not been taken. At the bin bag, oh, Carer took that, I think.

But make a meal, I’m really not feeling good.
TTFN!
Morning, I’m back.
The Caregiver called but still did not know where to take my laundry; the bag remains awaiting collection. I was in the right state when she arrived, so tired and exhausted.
I sorted out and ate the meal and settled in to watch the England Euro game. I fell asleep and missed most of it. Huh!

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Food Rating: 9/10!

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Ode From Fellow Blogger & Poet Paul.

Down Nottingham, there’s an odist called Gerald.
Whose smithing of words keeps us levelled.
He’s housebound but not gagged.
By his words bad leaders are scragged.
All of these make him our prophet and herald.

Paul wrote this in a comment. Nice!
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TTFNski, each!

Inchoated Inchy: Tuesday 9th July 2024

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I wish I could have found a turn-off button to the brain today.
Because it was of little use to me. And as for talking to myself out loud and swearingly, it went on and on, with no solutions, ideas, or hopes being created. By the time it came to Wednesday morning, all I’d done on this blog was the top section of graphics! And didn’t start this paragraph until nine o’clock! So this one will be sparser than usual, sorry.
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Not a good start!

I never considered washing and shaving until I smelt my B.O. as I got my head down 14 hours later! I did visit the Porcelain Throne with the intention of doing the ablutions after the evacuation, but as I sat there emptying the liquid product from my innards, I realised that the nurse was coming today to redo the ankle ulcer bandaging. I thought, well, I’ll do it later… but ashamedly, it wasn’t done at all!

The morning rain rained down.
I did notice it didn’t rain up (Hehe!).

This is the second brew of the day, which should mean the last brew, as I’m restricted to only two mugs daily. I consumed it as I worked hard, confused about what I was doing and possibly making more errors than ever before.
On the bright side, was so kind to me. I don’t think I had more than ten shocks all day!

The precipitation persisted for a while longer.

The Community Nurse Arrives.
This always cheers me up!
She set about getting the swathes of bandaged off of the right leg for me. The punctured ulcer was looking and feeling much better this time. And no sooner had she let the air in; an irresistible urge to scratch at the wound tempted me so much to chafe at it. Hehe! So, I think it might be getting better now. We, well, I, spoke of the eye problems. The nurse said I should get the Caregiver to call the Doctor for me. Carer Kara did it yesterday, but I’m unsure if she did it in my state now. Maybe she did later when she arrived today? I’m getting confused. Well, I fancy that; I’m getting confused! Har-Har!

The rain was getting lighter.

I got a letter informing me that I will be made an appointment at the Highbury Hospital shortly, and they will let me know later by post. The photo above was taken on my last visit.

Only the odd droplet of rain falling now. I went on the balcony and took a Kodak Tim from the end car park, where the mud-slide was. Plenty of it, too.

Then, as the eyes faded, I gave up on the computer and prepared the day’s meal. I made some roast spuds in the oven and added them to the sweet and sour ready-made meal I cooked in the microwave.
I’m sorry I bothered with it, now! It tasted just plain overly sweet; what happened to the sour bit of the contents? I’ll not be bothering with one of these again, Mr Asda!

Went to do the washing up, , I again the server trolley wheel. To a certain degree, I swore, rather viciously, washed the things up and took this photograph from the kitchen window. I love it when a snap comes out okay.

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What for you is happiness?
Not being loveless?
What are your favourite meal appetisers?
Mini Steak & Blue Cheese Pizzas?
Maybe tasty Stuffed dates with Ricottas?
Or, like me, cheesy baked potatoes?
Whatever – I’d love you to find that bliss!

TTFNski, Each!

Incessant Inchy: Monday 8th July 2024

(Starting this blog, Tuesday Morning)
The day of the one-eyed Inchy! Actually, Tuesday was as well. All day long, things were out of sync. My eyesight and hearing were not good, and I could not hear the intercom, door chime, or fire alarm activation. Cartilages Chloe and Carole were having a ball, freely issuing me pain at a whim. Both gave way a few times, but not at the wrong time, so no crumbling to the floor. Haha!
(I imagine they would have been disappointed in this).
And must have thought they deserved to win the prize for the ‘Bestest-Inchy-Brain-Interferers’ of the day. But that dubious honour was granted to , with a mention in despatches for & . The ankle ulcers and were both much kinder to me today.
I’m really not sure if I was having , , repeatedly falling asleep, or a combination of the three. But little got done that I set out to do. I felt so lacklustre.
Memory promoting from photos from here on.
The urine colour was not too bad later on.

Off to the . Messy!
The Asda order arrived. I handed some boxes and bags to the deliveryman, who kindly filled them for me at the door.
Then I carted them to the kitchenette, putting the things away in storage, the freezer, the fridge, the cupboards, the floor, and the junk room.
I took some Kodak Tim photographs along the way. This selection had a bottle of disinfectant (Lemon), bleach, and washing-up liquid.
Here, I have a Milk Roll, sliced bread, kitchen towels, bicarbonate of soda, soda water, and some of the economy kitchen towels, which I use to clean my spectacles, hearing aids, and cough into. Thick-skinned red potatoes are used to make baked spuds. Small fresh tomatoes and quick to cook potato cakes. A ready-made feast of cooked meals. Lamb Hotpot, Jamaican patties, Cumberland pie, and a sweet & sour battered balls meal.
I’m not going to starve! Hehehe! I must have ordered the wrong milk. It’s rare for me to get something wrong with food orders; this hardly ever happens. Ahem! Later, I tried this organic whole fresh milk. It was nothing special, but it was perfectly edible. My buying it again is not liable.
There was still room free in the fridge after packing everything into it.
Made a diversion to the wet room. For another of the visits. This time, in control, but only just this time. I sensed a possible resurgence underway from . After noting the lack of any post-evacuation rumbling and grumbling from the innards, I made this decision.

A series of mini s, all through the afternoon, broke my already fragile concentration.

The drizzle stopped and the grey skies turned a lovely blue hue. Unfortunately, the blotches were still on the Kodak Tim snaps. Humph!
It looked to me, as the right ankle ulcer covered with the compression wrapping was doing better. That was because the wanting to scratch at the itching had returned. On the other foot, it looked like that ulcer was brewing up to do a bursting out. I can’t win. I dread the thought of having to walk with both ankles erupting and both Cartilages giving me grief. I’ll never be able to get to the surgery, clinic or hospital. Thinking this gave me a dread of having to use a wheelchair. Please, I hope not!

I took this evening’s snap from the kitchen window and then worked out my plans for the daily meal. The ready-made meal with the shortest sell-by date was the Lamb Hotpot.
I got some frozen potato chunks cooking in the oven. I checked the timing for the hotpot, and it was six minutes in the microwave. I got some lamb gravy ready to mix. Then retired to the itch-creating, bruise-giving, catheter-tube-tugging, crumb-decorated from my nocturnal nibbling, God-awfully uncomfortable, cringingly grotty, no longer working, dirty beige, anti-sleep designed, c1966, second-hand bought for £300 ten years ago from the charity shop recliner, to watch the end of the ‘Heartbeat’ programme. as the first adverts came on the screen. Waking up in response to a giant whole-body-twitch and jump! I recalled a bit of a dream I had been having. It involved me and Grizelda in mutual contact! So, say no more! Then I smelled the potatoes cooking in the oven… I en route to the kitchenette, hit my shoulder on the edge of the door frame when I entered the kitchen. I found that the potatoes needed a little extra time to get them as I like them. Very well singed!
So I put the meal in the microwave, and as the microwave pinged, I took the potatoes out of the oven. I acquired the standard burnt finger on the oven racking. (I Germolened it.) Then I made some Germolene-flavoured Bisto lamb gravy, adding a drop of Winiary Przyprawa seasoning into the mix. Then, put the potatoes into the bowl, and poured the gravy over them. Followed by scrapping the lamb hotpot contents out of the tray on top. What an absolute feast of a meal this was! It just may have been the flavour of the Germolene that gave it an extra tang? Hehehe! I had a pot of mandarins in jelly to round off the meal.
Passed wind, bleached and drifted of into another mind-blank or sleep.
Woke up to find the food tray had fallen, leaving crumbs and gravy all over my new nightshirt, my legs, bandages and the carpet. I had to change my attire.
Carer Chris arrived and laughed when he saw the T-shirt that Sister Jane bought me a few years ago. He took a Kodak Tim snap of it and then of the sun setting from the balcony windows.
It was so sad to see so many new blotches in the Horizon pictures, sob!

It was good of Chris to take the piccies for me, all the same.

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May your plans not get stunted,
Nor your valuables get hunted,
May your problems be ameliorated,
Your hopes do not get frustrated.
That your sanity can be corroborated,
Your computer doesn’t get corrupted,
And your dreams will not be interrupted!
May good fortune be indicated!
May your problems be quadrated!

Please haveth a great day!

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Incarcerated Inchy: Saturday 6th July 2024

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Sorry, it’s not a good one (blog) from here on.
The England match, Seizures with the shock of them winning on penalties, the tumble, and much-needed sleep overtook me.
Highlights here and there, but little written content.
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Very dark.

Unknown why I took this. I can’t recall taking it.

Morning.

Taken seconds before the tumble.
Struggled to get the slippers on. You can see the loose carpet I slipped on seconds later between the slippers.

Waste sorted.

Bootiful!

Food delivery.
4 Frazzles were ordered and charged for, and 2 arrived.

Football Match. Seizure.

Taken to the right.
Taken to the left, both from the kitchen.

Still kaki, almost cube-shaped.
Had to patch up the compression dressing, then do the usual medicationings, olive oiled the wears, and Germoloided the haemorrhoids. Acne and Barrier creams were applied.
Had a struggle to get the PPs on today.
And getting the Phorpain Gel on;
It was as painful as it had ever been.
Talk about making myself jump, which, of course, got the Cartilages playing up. With the compression tackle on the right leg, I can no longer use Phorpain to ease the agony. Hehehe!
So, more painkillers were taken. At least getting dressed was not so bad; it was just the long pullover nightshirt.
The carer arrived and got the one odd bamboo diabetic sock and slippers on for me.

Fantastic sun rays are coming through the cloud to the right of the balcony. Had the alien invasion started? Hahaha!

Lamburgers with sliced tomatoes in sourdough rolls, & a can of carrots & peas were cooked and served up. A pot of mandarin segments in orange jelly was the day’s dessert.

What a great hue later on!
A Pareidoliaising Delight!
Heads, eyes, animals, Great!

Here’s the brolly revealed that I could not find!

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May your foibles ferment with festivities!

Incapacity Inchy: Friday 5th July 2024

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From here on, this blog will be sparse… very much so. For my eyesight and memory seemed to go off so much earlier today. Having less than 2 hours of sleep did not help. Finding no logical reason for this irked me a smidgeon. I slowly got a lot more tired earlier today. Then, the double vision started. Shame really. But the nurse came and rebandaged the leg and ankle. The wound on spouted out with a flourish of thick, deep red fluids when the nurse took off the sealing pad. She was not pleased with that. She noticed the bruise on my chin, and I explained my Non-Epilectic Seizure and told her how I could not recall going into the wetroom and did not even know I’d taken a tumble or if I’d passed out or not. I just came around mangled in the shower chair with a bleeding gum, broken tooth, sore chin and a headache. She said for me to ring my doctor and her. I’ve gone out of sync again.

I did not put the night pouch on last night, so heap-geep-coloured urine was in the nearly full-day day pouch.

My eyesight seemed pretty decent when I started writing the blog. But it faded quicker than usual.

Carer Maryham arrived, concerned about my looking so pale, and asked about the scar on my chin. I told her what had happened in my usual wit-interposed way. I got a good laugh back, which was my design. Hehehe! Maryham was concerned for me. Which was nice.

I watched a bit of TV for a while, including election results.

The trip to the wet room was a painful one. I thought yesterday’s was, but this was even worse.

!!!
The computer froze.

Then I got a message telling me things were being auto-mended. It was at it for two hours. I feared this was the end!

The District Nurse arrived. I was unhappy with the ulcer wound’s not healing at all. She also asked about the bruise on my chin, and I launched into a humorous explanation: ‘Ring your doctor!’

The computer was turned off because everything had frozen again. I was at a low ebb now.

Carer Kim came. We went through the same process, but I got a more significant response this time. Kim laughed so much.
‘Ring your doctor!’

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Amazing clouds as I made a brew of tea.
Then, the eyes finally got too bad, and I was about to pack up and restart in the morning, and Carer Chris came.
He medicated me and had to nip off. He was busy but looked so tired. Bless him.
I got some potatoes in the oven and then closed down the computer. Boy, was I tired!
For some reason, as I was cooking, my mind went back to Rationing. Many years ago, when I was on a fishing holiday with Bill, Malcolm and Jock, we had just arrived at Lockerbie in Scotland. I was backing the van into the car park, and Bill, a butcher, said out of the blue, “I wish they would bring rationing back; I made a fortune with all the fiddles…” It’s funny how I can recall this clearly, but I’d forgotten what I had planned earlier to have for my meal tonight. I think it was lamb burgers, but I found a short-dated vegan pie and had that.
I forgot to add the garden peas. The potatoes were grand, but the vegan pie was not so good, although the gravy was absolutely delicious!

Cleaned the pots and back to the £300 second-hand shop bought, c1966 made. Moth-eaten, bedraggled, grotty, cringingly-beige-coloured, much-dilapidated, crumb-containing from my nocturnal nibblings, bug-ridden, itch-inspiring, not working recliner. And spotted the scene outside of the sunset.
I thought I’d nip onto the balcony and take a Kodak Tim of it, which I did. Lens blotches included.

It was well past midnight before he let me into his world, a world that I was forced torn from by one of the longest-ever leg climbing I’ve had since they started three months or so ago. After which the ulcer emitted short, sharp, shocks, every ten-minutes it felt like, for the rest of the night.
had returned with a certain degree of nastiness and persistence.

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Have a good day, Tatty Bye!