06:15hrs: The old codger awoke. He found himself appreciating that he’d woken up overnight for only about six times. Much better than the previous two nights. Three by his , and the same by . He had a rumbling grumbling in his stomach. He then emptied his nocturnal catheter pouch. Not pleased with the amount of blood that seemed to be in his passed urine. He… well, I (Slipped into the second person mode there, sorry), I grabbed hold of and off to the wet room. WC duties first, and what a session this one was! The evacuated missile clunked into the WC bowl; it was wedged with about a quarter of it out of the water, and covered with the after-flow of a small dollop of high-quality stinky splashes from ‘s follow-up flow.
Ablutions and medicalisationing tasks were carried out. But, not without the odd . Here they are… Maybe not in order as they happened, but at least I can remember them: Cut my neck shaving, only a tiny one, no bother. Teeth and gums bleeding. All but went over getting the PPs on; I hate that balancing job. The urine flowing into the pouch looked a bit bloodied. And needed cleaning up again and ointmentating. But, I got it all done in under two hours. And then as a parting shot as I left the wet room, I shoulder charged against the door frame, and set off . Went back in and got some Phorpain gel on the shoulder where I could reach to rub it in. Oh, and I trapped my finger in the cupboard door. People won’t believe my good luck… or lack of it!
Carer Marie called. In a rush, but we managed a mini-natter. Then I spent hours making errors as I tried to get the blog started. Carer Kara called next. She was in a rush, too. However, she did sort out the problem I had with the TV yesterday. Did it in two minutes. (I did feel a fool not being able to get it done myself) Bless her. She shot off, and I was lonely again, just like when Marie departed. Sad, innit? Hahaha! I got a snack made up to satisfy my sudden hunger. Some Microwave chips, Eurgh! Milk Roll bread, and soy franks. Nice! Taste Rating: 5.2/10. Washed the things, and spotted some unusual activity of Devon close. On, Cavendish Close. So, I got from the kitchen and concentrated on getting clear photographs of whatever it was that was going on. But it was only some resurfacing of the road. I really must get to the opticians to get the eyes tested again… but then… if I do it will cost hundreds of quid, and the the Glaucoma operation is due shortly. Of course, I was talking in the NHS 1960’s mode there – what I meant was, (back to 2024); The Glaucoma operation may be due within three or four years, if I live long enough!
A kitchen window photo to the right was taken first. No idea what it was, but I loved this one. Nothing special on shoe, but I found it appealling. Then I took one of the lowering sun to the left of the window. At this stage, the night Carer called. It was nibble-nibbling Carer Christopher. We had a chinwag, but he wasn’t listening. Nothing new there. He took the laundry bag with him, it wasn’t full though. Laughs, and lads insults were swapped. Hehehe! .I almost got caught out when the catheter day pouch suddenly filled so quickly again – all okay though, nae bother. It was emptying slowly for some reason unknown to me. When to get second and last brew of tea, . And the beautiful sight of the sun setting caught my eye. I had no other choice than to go back to the computer to get the camera, and return to take these shots of the views offered me by Mother Nature. Gorgeous, even if not as good as they might have been. Ten minutes later, I caught the sun just as it was about to disappear over the horizon, and out of view. Lovely! Finally got the blog finished and posted off to WordPress.
I watched the TV at the same time as starting this blog going. But it ended up not being. I found so many mistakes on the blog I’d posted earlier, that it took me an hour to correct them all. Even then, I probably missed a few.
The baby baguettes at the side of the tray of potato hot-pot, shows up just how measily the mini-sized Parsley Box meal was.
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Another hazy, confusing day. Constantly fitting between tasks and somehow not getting many finished. I had a few minutes of almost clarity of mind when I was replying to the comments… it was heaven as long as it lasted. But that was it productiveness-wise. I struggled when the Community Rehab & Falls people were doing an update on my condition. I remember a lot, at least I think I do, but so many blanks, and I can’t find the numbers they left to contact them; if I remember anything, I’ve not told them as I fumbled along, losing track of what was going on. Stuttering Stephanie caused embarrassment, and (there’s a word for this, but I can’t recall it) when I used the wrong words a few times when answering their questions. I look up the word again; it is ‘Receptive Aphasia’; I’ve now given this ailment a name, calling her Receptive Aphasia Phyllis.
Confusion reigned, and I was out of it more than in. And, I forgot to record, or can’t find where I wrote it if I did, the time of their next appointment. Humph!
Once again, it’s the next day, and I have only just started on this blog. (Friday 09:30hrs)
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Getting my head down so late in the morning again and Thinking Storming Steven having regular go at my sanity, I was finally settling into a decent period of sleep, and the Carer arrived. (07:15hrs). This I recall. But what happened on the visit, is a mystery to me. I can’t read the scribbled notes about whatever happened, well, the odd word, like, no pouch… waste bags, throne and view. This, I assume, was the view. The first picture on Kodak Tim. Not many were there, with the two-hour-plus visitation from the Falls & Rehab interview. A lot of that I can remember, along with the blanks. Another reversal in style and content from the first failed visit to the Porcelain Throne. Waste bags were sorted out and placed near the doorway into the foyer. I recall seeing Josie’s as was, door and started to worry about her. I’ve found out she is in a care home in Arnold, but not which. I want to visit her, but no one seems to know where she is. Her family have been emptying her flat all week. So sad! I did ask for the carers on each visit to take the laundry down for me. But it’s still there, a bulging bag that is only going to get fullerer! Hahaha!.
Ah, I remember now; the first Carer was Christopher, and he came back later to check I was alright. Apparently, I was ‘Out of it’ and expressing depressional feelings on the first visit. Bless him!
NHS FALLS & REHABILITATION VISIT
Miguel, with Trainee Charlotte from the Falls Team, arrived at the flat, to do an assessment on me. Some of this section may be out of sync or missing altogether due to my FND. Had to put new batteries in the hearing aids, and they are all fine now with the hearing problem. But things being told me were not sinking in, and I was… well, what the word? Disorientated, adrift and losing track of what I was replying to as much as the advice and questions that were coming my way. The medical history was updated. After an hour or so, I was told that an appointment would be made for a visit from a Physiotherapist. Which may be affected by the Physiotherapist’s Strike Action. I’d hoped to get help with the FND symptoms and Cognisant Impairment Iris. They bother me more than anything physical; I know the falls and pains are caused by a combination of Peripheral Neuropathy, Pete, & Receptive Dysphasia Phyllis. I think I mentioned the electric current tingling in the ankles and feet getting worse. If not, I meant to!
Miguel got me to do some exercises with stretching, leg lifting etc. Concentrated on the knees, and Cartilages Chloe and Carole. Carole was far more painful when lifting the right leg. I mentioned that it sometimes the left leg worse, or both of them. He mentioned something at this point, I think, but that has absconded into the grey haze of forgetfulness along with other things. Talking of getting about difficulties, he had me walk around the flat with the trolley. I mentioned , and her wobbly handlebar. Miguel had it sorted in a short time for me; it works fine now. Grrreat! Thanks. Reflux Roger kicked off while we were talking, and Miguel looked very concerned. I’m sure I explained how the problem arose after the Mechanical Aorta Valve operation. Ensuring him that there was only a vague imitational bit of pain each time it blasted out the air through my mouth, and it happens every day or night. The night ones would have woken me up, but with Thought Storming Steve and Shaking Shoulder Shirley, I was usually awake when he hit me, anyway. After they had left, I could not find the contact numbers for them, as I mentioned earlier. Tsk! – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
The late afternoon is a mystery to me. I know I was a little peed-off at myself for not recalling or recording matters of the visit and self-loathing at the time, but rather than a Memory Blank this time, it may have been due to Receptive Aphasia Phyllis. As I had not got anything done between drifting off and coming back for about an hour, on the computer. Of course, I may have nodded off in the computer chair?
Can of 3-Bean soup, with a vegetable and tomato sauce. Two cheap but nice Asda baguettes. A pot of 10-calorie strawberry jelly for afters. It tasted lovely, rich, flavourful and most of it was eaten. (I made too much, methinks!)
I thought all that veg might have helped me on the Porcelain Throne Evacuation. It didn’t. This was my third failed attempt today! Hopefully, by the time the food works its way down into the guts, things will improve. Of course, I could be wrong!
How did you do at guessing what the thingamabob was in the photo? Hehehe! Did you spot the face in the foam cleaner? I have to admit, I can’t see it now, but did at the time? No, no, I can see it again now! I took a terribly bad picture of the evening view from the kitchen window. I’m getting good at doing this… something of an expert almost! But I tried one higher up, thinking it would be easier to get a decent-quality shot of the clouds in the night sky. The clouds I saw with my eyes taking this, seem to have melted away? Ah, well!
I clouted my right shoulder against the wet room door. As I checked, I’d not left any taps running. This produced the longest-ever bout come attack from Shirley’s Shaking Shoulder I’ve had for a long time.
Shirley’s shuddering carried on to when I got my head down. Typical, the one night out of the last ten, that Thought Storming Steven was giving me a rest, and Shirley takes up the mantle of keeping me awake!
Unbelievable! I finally nod off in the early hours of the morning, and REflux Roger wakes me up repeatedly with his gigantic emissions of wind! Not that they hurt a lot; they just wake me up with the power of the gastroesophageal emissions. Humph!
I’m not very good at the moment and will have to cut this short. It’s tomorrow at 12:56 hrs, and I’ve only just gotten around to this blog. I will tell you more in the next issue; the details are a bit tender in mind now. (I thought I’d throw in an Agatha Christie-like bit of content here, Hahaha!) – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – I’ll rush through this so I can make it a better effort tomorrow and amuse, entertain, and tickle you.
Another busy day. But, not not in a wrong way. The pleasure of Vampire Nurse Hristina coming to take my blood for the Warfarin INR checks. Another of my Angels. So sweet & patient, too, and the best bloodtaker I know. Very rarely have bled after she does me! ♥ called for her financial help visit. She ordered a lift for me following Monday, to the Diabetes Clinic in Bulwell. We were too early to book the doctor’s visit in February, but Kara will remind me nearer the time. ♥ She also pointed out how to use the TV remote again; I’m just not taking anything new in, nowadays… well, not keeping it in, anyway. She then made up the meal at the chair table for me – What a gal! She took the laundry down with her for me as she left. She’ll replace the catheter pouch in the morning.
I rose gingerly and felt so cold, as 05:40hrs. Removed the slightly dark urine bag and emptied it. I had a bit of a struggle to get the link tube out, but I got there without any .
Maddeningly Mangled Morning Moon Images
The last one was a smidge betterer!
Signs of a guilt-promoting nature in the bin!
Made a mug of Glengettie tea. I planned to drink it while blogging. But… Was interrupted by the need for a rear-end evacuation. And what a messy one, it was! Had a wash and got the tended to. Then I got daily as and if needed ones attended to. A lot of them were needed. I ran out of the dry-eye spray, but I’ve a little left of the dry-eye drops. Must get some more.
I had a search around in case I might have left a bottle of the eye spray with the medical supplies in or near the Steptoe & Son rubbish room. I’d not, Humph!
The laundry had not been returned yet. I’ll ask the Carer if they know where it is… as long as it’s not been stolen again, I’ll be content with that. Tsk!
A telephone call from the surgery confirmed the February Medicine Assessment appointment. Also, the change in the Warfarin doses, & the need to keep to them strictly. As the level is up and down, they want to know why.
I ordered some slippers from Amazon to stop people laughing at me when they called. Hahaha! They should be here tomorrow, about 22:00hrs. The chances of me hearing the intercom or being awake at that time are questionable, to say the least.
I found these photos of the morning shots that I had unaccountably missed earlier. Well, I say unaccountably, of course, the guilt will be shared twit, , and . With the wind blowing hard, I took these through the kitchenette window glass. The misshaped moon and reflection of whatever it was gave it an airiness? The wide shot of the houses qualified as terrible and artistic, I think? Hehe! It brought back to mind an arcade and Atari computer game of the 1970s. I can’t recall the name. Is there something about space?
The potato was selected to be used for the cheesy baked potato nosh. Got the mega-spud in the oven. Getting the ingredients together and the catheter day pouch emptied. Hours later, when the potato was nearly done, I got the knife and cutlery ready to cut the spud in half and mash it up with some Leicester Cheese, sea salt, black pepper and a knob of Flora no-butter butter… Getting the sharp knife, I, once again, knocked the box off of the shelf… Double-Humph! One of the cheaper knife blades broke into two, another the tip snapped off, not be seen again… (I anticipate finding it, or instead treading on it with no shoes on, later) Emptied the flesh into the mixing bowl. And gave the contents a food mashing up. I put a plaster on the cut fingernail afterwards.
Carer Chris called… or was it Carer Israel?
Finally, I got the nosh served up. I rinsed, put the pots in the sink, and took the meal to the front room. I very nearly had an . Luckily, I often do this; I was unsure if I’d left the tap running, so I went back to the kitchen to check… and I had! The plaster had come off of the finger and blocked the sink plug hole! The sink had filled virtually to the highest point. So I dived, moved the bowl, and yanked out the plaster. Saving the day and water-alert alarm going off! What a Hero! I ran the three scalded fingers under the cold tap and applied some Germolene. The finger had stopped bleeding, so it needed no attention. Back to the meal… eating it from the £300 second-hand shop purchased, c1966, welt-causing, uncomfortable, not-working, itch-inspirational, crumb-containing recliner, using the Carer Kara sorted out for me collapsible table. The cheesy potatoes were fantastic! The burgers were horrible. The wheatmeal rolls were okay. The HP fruity sauce… Eurgh!
I grappled my way up from the itch-creating, bruise-giving, catheter-tube-tugging, crumb-decorated from my nocturnal nibblings, God-awfully uncomfortable, cringingly-grotty, no longer working, dirty beige, anti-sleep designed, c1966, second-hand bought for £300, ten years ago from the charity shop, recliner, and felt amazingly up for it. Took the photo above of the nocturnal pouch. Then…
However, by the time I’d spent on the crossword book and counting the acne and Excema clumps that had fallen on the floor, about 15 minutes or so… The day pouch had almost filled up!
Carer Shaquille arrived, and we got the medications sorted; no need for any of the ankle or leg straps this morning; I planned to get a stand-up wash and shave. I didn’t make it; that was due to falling asleep again for over three hours later on.
Got on the computer, and I got a visit from my Angel of Mercy, Hristina. She is so kind and understanding, patient too. I also believe she has a high EQ, for she soon picked up on my depression, and we chatted a minute or two after she’d painlessly taken the INR Warfarin blood Test. ♥ A Sweetheart!
The long unanticipated Sleep. How did I not wake up or fall off of the chair remains another of the mysteries of Woodthorpe Court, with the ghosts, wraiths, spectres, cacodaemons, apparitions, and other grotesqueries that haunt the hallways and lobbies, searching for Inchie to curse with bad luck, create ambiguities, abstrucities, perplexities, misfortunes and botherations, to scare. worry and confuse me! Cataract Kathie, Neuropathy Pete and Cognitive Impairment Iris were the main culprits. There’s others, too.
But it took its time.
I cut the fat off of the meat, and cubed it, ready to go in the vegetables later on. Mind Blank Got the veg and sauce in the saucepan. Added the meat, peas and beans, and stirred it in, with some chunky veg sauce.
Blimey, it was freezing out there; the nurse and Carers said so as well.
Made a mug of Glengettie tea. And started on the Ode.
Sister Jane rang. We had a little natter. She will call me later, in case I nod off before the Forest Cup match begins later on. It’s on TV.
Pretty delicate clouds.
An hour later, the darkness fell, and the sun rushed down over the horizon. Then I took a close-up shot.
I got the potatoes from the oven and added them to the pan. Good and crisp they were. Maintained stirring up and, at one time, added a bit more sauce. Enough there for two meals, sn tomorrows will all ready for warming up. Well, that’s the plan!
I got a phone call from the Doctors with the updated Warfarin /INR blood test results. The INR had dropped to 1.8, from 3.2. The dosages had gone up a smidgeon, as I expected. 1½ every night, apart from Thursday, that is two. I got the nosh served up.
Bootiful! Rich, tasty, lip-smacking good!
Carer Israel arrived. In a bit of a rush, he’s doing the last late call as well, as I got ready to watch the football. I took a photo of him that was the best shot I’d taken for ages. Whoopsiedangleploppery! In the morning, I found that I’d not got the SD card in! Grumph! Sister Jane rang to remind me about the match being on TV.
The Cup Match was between Blackpool (League 1) v Nottingham Forest (Premier Div, [as of now anyway]). Premier League side Nottingham Forest needed extra time to see off League One’s Blackpool in a thrilling FA Cup third-round replay at Bloomfield Road. Forest had looked to be cruising into the fourth round when Danilo made it 2-0 in the first minute of the second half after Andrew Omobamidele had scored in the 16th minute on his Forest debut. But Blackpool fought back in style at a raucous Bloomfield Road.
Albie Morgan, whose poor back-pass had led to Danilo’s goal, pulled one back with a great strike from 25 yards before substitute Kyle Joseph headed in from close range to make it 2-2 to set up a frantic finish. Then, in the eighth minute of additional time, Blackpool almost won it, but Orel Mangala made an incredible block on the goal-line after Karamoko Dembele had gone around Forest goalkeeper Odysseas Vlachodimos.
Early in the second period of extra time, the visitors retook the lead as Ryan Yates’ low cross from the left was turned in by Chris Wood for what proved to be the winning goal.
Blackpool boss Neil Critchley felt the goal could have been disallowed for offside and said the fact video assistant referee technology was used at the first match (because it was held at a Premier League ground)) and not at the replay was damaging the “integrity of the competition”. Nuno Espirito Santo’s side will now play away at Bristol City on Friday, 26 January, in the fourth round.
Although sleeping with its usual broken nodding and waken routine, I was still in the second-hand, £300, c1968, overwhelmingly sickening beige-coloured, tatty, uncomfortable, wobbly, germ-producing, falling to pieces, food residue collecting recliner at 07:15hrs. And was almost annoyed when the summoning to the Porcelain Throne arrived and had to get up.
A decent amount of pee was passed! I can’t say the same for the rear-end evacuation on the Throne. Ah, well! A False Alarm, then?
I found this mystery photo on the SD later. What it was and why I took it remains another mystery of Woodthorpe Court, with the hobgoblins, spectres, gnomai, phantasms, ghosts, the grotesque succubae, extraterrestrials, ectoplasms, spirits, or the Fata Morganas, Cognitive Impairment Iris, & FND, that have been sent to taunt, irritate and terminate my already limited saneness of mind? You never know; I might remember what it was all about while I’m doing this blog… What am I saying… Tsk!
Washed, and I went back to the recliner… deliberately emptying the bags without checking for any nocturnally nibbled empty packets of crisps. Looking through the balcony windows, the ground frost was apparent.
Ti the kitchen to make a brew of J Sainsbury’s Extra Strong tea. And took the view above.
Carer Richard arrived, I can remember bits of the session clearly, but so many blanks remain. Even I can’t believe or understand why. Then a mild depression started due to this. I was losing what we’d said minutes earlier. But could recall the time he arrived?
I made a start on today’s ode. Concentration was good, and I knew this was going to take some time. Carer Maryam arrived. She said she was here to do the domestic shift. And a grand job she did for me. And, I can remember a lot of what the gal did and said. She cleaned the oven and the kitchen floor, tidied around, and had a go at the wet room floor but had to rush it a little as the time was up. Bless her cotton socks. Oh, yes, socks; I can recall Richard putting on the socks, ankle and legging straps for me now. And he checked the medication’s stock in hand and dates.
Back on the ode creating, which for some reason, I was struggling with. This annoyed me, as they usually flow pretty easily from my infected brain. But not today? After emptying the fast-filling day pouch… I got seated, and actually, no joking, I nodded off on the computer chair for I don’t know how long for. I woke up as chimed out, and Carer Marie came into the room. She was in a hurry today, but we did have a little natter, moan, and laugh, as she issued the medications. ♥
As the gal left, I got another hint that I needed to use the again, so I did. Haha!
It was a long wait, but I got the evacuation to start, and it needed some effort on my part to free the initial concrete torpedo, which edged its way painfully and bloodily into the WC; there followed a tsunami of almost liquid shooting out! I felt drained, and somehow or other, as I was working out what needed doing cleaning up and medically… I fell asleep again and sat atop the dark brown torpedo and brown liquid in the bowl. When I woke up, things had dried on the lower rear-end region, the stink was terrible, as I got myself sorted out first, a good cleaning, drying and Germolened the backside, I saw the clock, and by Jimminee, I reckon I’d been asleep for over an hour and a half, maybe longer. Another cleaning up session of the floor, porcelain and WC lid had to be done. Where did the time go? What day is it?
I got things sorted, went to the kitchen, and planned the meal of the day. Chips, peas and beef & gravy! A banana and pot of jelly for afters! Despite my frustration at the events and another bout of depression, I turned into a different person while eating this nosh. It tasted grand!
After Carer Chris called, I decided I’d had enough of taking horrible night photos and would do my damnedest to take some good ones! Well, that one wasn’t any good… Strewth, how many moons did I take? Haha! Wrinkles again. A misshaped moon too, but at least I got it looking vaguely like a moon.
Had a mug of tea, and… FELL ASLEEP AGAIN When I woke up, Carer Chris was in the room, taking off the leggings. I can’t say much more; I cannot recall much of what happened at all. After he’d left I realised that I had not started this blog off yet! Made a start, and now, at 02:45hrs in the morning, I’m up to here with it.
I went to check that I’d not left the tap or stove on, and decided to try one last time at taking a morning hot of the view from the kitchenette. Took the sky first, not very good was it… Again! That’s it, a semi-decent one at last! Well…
The stretched photo revealed (Just the bottle).
So weary now. 03:50hrs! I have the District nurse coming tomorrow, an Asda order, and someone else, but I cannot recall who, and I’ve not put it on my calendar. Humph! So, I do not have much time free tomorrow.
First things: Escaped the £300, second-hand, c1968, cringingly-beige-coloured, not-working, rickety recliner. Balance exercises, then…
This sad photo was taken from the kitchenette window. Supposedly, a close-up of Cavendish Avenue. Then, I tried to get a decent view of the horizon
Consistent!
Had a mug of J.S. red label Ex-Strong tea
arrived. No socks or strappings were needed, as I intended to get a shower later. But this didn’t happen. Humph! I asked the lad if he could help me with assembling of the table. Negative response. But I still gave him his treats, as usual. Bless him!
Bit of a change here…
Catching up with the blog for Friday. For about three hours of error-ridden writing.
Visit four: Another variation on an old theme.
Another attempt at a decent photo as it got lighter.
I nearly got caught out when the day punch suddenly filled up again. A little dark, still, too.
Hours later, I nipped out on the balcony to view the end car par mudslide. Shrinking back again. It might be gone soon if we do not get any more rain, perhaps?
Called. We had a little natter and treat sharing. No painkillers are needed.
Then, I decided to make an early meal. Surimi sticks, tomatoes, beetroot, chips, cobs, with a side of Chop sauce. Not bad at all.
Slurped! Ice cream followed.
I was drained, and I put the computer in ‘sleep mode’ and fell blissfully asleep… for five minutes or so. Tormenting, teasing dreams that even I could barely understand flowed for a couple of hours or more. Constantly bursting awake… Yet seemed to go back to sleep immediately? It was as if I wanted, needed, I had to, involuntarily, get back to the nightmares. Oddest few hours mentally than I’ve had for weeks! I’m certain that I was talking to myself all the way through! The need for yet another visit to the Throne was welcomed. Bad as it was, it broke my determination to try to get back to the mental turmoil of sleep. How messy… but welcome?
Late sunset photos were taken. Lovely shade on view. Tried a little closer. Then, to the left slightly.
Carer arrived; I was out of reality; I could not even remember who called. I found a set of Health Check figures in the morning, so I must have taken his B.P. I think it may have been Victor or Israel? I’ll publish the latest in the morning.
Hunger Again – I’m eating far too much lately! Frustration? – Depression? – FND? Naughty!
A confusing day. Mind Blanks, drifting off into sleep, even when on the computer. I’d had the longest unbroken sleep for ages, yet this did nothing to curb the drooping eyes, lack of concentration and endless run of depression bouts, varying between a few minutes, and hours. I have been nibbling all day long, never eaten so much in a day for many a month. Generally feeling fatigued without cause or reason.
0400hrs; Woke up, and just laid there, almost unthinkingly, in the itch-creating, bruise-giving, catheter-tube-tugging, crumb-decorated from my nocturnal nibblings, God-awfully uncomfortable, cringingly-grotty, no longer working, dirty beige recliner, anti-sleep designed, c1966, second-hand bought for £300, ten years ago from the charity shop. Four what must have been an hour or so. Joined by , which I don’t think bothered me too much at the time. It felt like having a video playing repetitively in my head, over several mistakes and bad options I’d taken many years ago. I surrendered any resistance, considering myself worthy of the self-lambasting verbal flow.
A good shade this morning.
Three early morning views. The high moon in the amazingly light sky.
When I got back to the kitchen, the sky seemed to have gotten a lot, very grown much darker? Or, did I set wrongly? Closer up. Even closer.
Not sure why I took this one.
I mosied along to the computer and got myself in a pickle, as I made so many errors, unfelt key depressions, and ended up having to close each open programme, and restart, in the hopes of getting the keyboard that I’d some-buggered up. Miraculously, when I rebooted it was working again.
This temporarily cheered me up.
I went out on the balcony to try and take a shot of the end car park, now seemingly permanent mudslide.
A pad patch here. Two hours at least. I’d just become aware of things, and a new Carer Called. I hope she does again, too. , a lovely gal. She introduced herself, and got the leg strappings on, and sorted the medications for me.
Well, blanks, really. Several over about an hour
I can recall taking this shot. I was in a depression at the time; the keyboard was playing up again… or maybe was, or both of us?
A Carer called, who and when I’m not certain. But after she or he had been, I deflated spiritually and physically. The computer turned off, and I got an early meal made. I swear I thought I’d taken two photos of that meal, recalling that the first one was so bad, that I took another one. But much, much later, hours later, after my failed attempts at sleeping or watching TV, when I got around to putting the photographs on the blog, it was on the card. Yet, the photo of the ice cream I had for desserts, was there on the SD card? !
The attempt to get to sleep failed. So, I tried watching TV. That failed and became so annoying, I got all agitated with myself. I get have few nodding-offs of a minute or so. No phone calls came in all day. Which is not unusual, but this brought on another depression and bouts of self-pity. I am having a bad day. Cheered when I had an Email from HRH Lisa. ♥
I literally sat there afterwards, with the TV pointlessly on, not being controllable, as, indeed, my mind was in a similar position, hazy.
I decided to get back on the computer again and I might as well stay up to get some New Year fireworks shots taken. But my confidence in getting any is minimal, to say the least. But I’ll try, but will I cope with falling asleep and missing them… or the shots coming out badly? Which is likely, as I type this, my old friend is kicking off, and not showing any signs of stopping yet.
Pressed on with this blog, to get as much done as I can before the planned fireworks photographicalisationing begins. If I don’t fall asleep! I didn’t. I think I was doing graphics for the blogs for a couple of hours, but it was going excruciatingly slow. The late Carer removed the ankle and leg strappings and ointmentated the lower legs. They were not painful at all during the day but started itching away on removal. Resisting scratching was a hard job. Hehe! However, they were a lot better than they had been lately, so a positive at last. The only pain was from the ingrowing toenail toe, that I proceeded to make worse by stubbing it on the £300 second-hand shop bought, c1966. moth-eaten, bedraggled, grotty, cringingly-beige-coloured, much-dilapidated, crumb-containing from my nocturnal nibblings, bug-ridden, itch-inspiring, not working recliner leg. It seems to be going a darker colour and bent more now?
Around 23:00hrs, I tried to take a decent shot of the end car park mudslide; you can just make it out.
The time (midnight) came for me to attempt to take the New Year fireworks photos from the kitchen window. Unbelievably bad shots they were too!
For a New Year, suitably so, Artistic, but not a Gainsborough, Showing a hint of fe-fi-fo?
As into the New Year, we flow… As a sage, these things I know,
Sunak Rishi will have to go… A defeated Tory will whistle-blow! The little boats will exceedingly grow… For Starmer, a coming body blow! He will become a confused Pinocchio, World War instigated via Moscow,
President Xi Jinping, China, also!
Arms Oligarchs’ wealth, will overflow,
The West will lose its limited Mojo,
Europe will ban alcohol & tobacco…
Legalise Cocaine, & Heroin, taxed though,
Then replace football with Subutteo, Europe will become the last Alamo, The smaller free word, ran by the Mafioso! Of course, this is all rubbish – Cheerio!
Another bite to eat. Two slices of plain bread, with one… Gorgeous early morning supper!
A day of lack of concentration, depression, mistakes and frustrations. However, I did get some graphics done in advance. But it took me that long to achieve; the night and darkness had fallen, and I did little else all day. No shower or shave, no cooking or eating. I just got carried away with making the graphics and odeing. I couldn’t help it. The depression convinced me to do what I enjoy doing cause nothing is going to help my memory, dizziness, loss of balance and confusion. It is at this moment, 18:20hrs. And I’m just starting this blog going. So, it will be another scarcity of details. Mainly cause I’m so tired and cannot remember much of what has happened! Sorry! Gonna be another lack of sleep night, methinks.
04:14hrs: Woke up. It seemed a good idea, but I don’t know why I bothered!
Nocturnal urine was a bit lighter.
Started by sorting the waste bags into one.
The plan was to get a shower & shave, so I left off the leg and ankle straps when Carer Richard arrived. When I asked him not to put them on, I asked if he could please ring my landline, as I’d not had any calls coming in and was worried that Liberty-Global may have gone off again. I gave him the wrong number and cheered him up. He verbally suggested that I was a nuisance – he was right. I found the correct number, and he rang again; the first one I gave him was for the Audio Clinic. Tsk! The landline rang. Thus, it made me feel much better that no one had rung me for four days. Humph! Sulk! Hehe!
I am off to the wet room for the only visit up till now of this very wet, rainy Thursday. Hey-Ho!
I took a half-decent shot to the moon as I made a brew of Glengettie… Dropped the mug, broke the mug, cleaned up the mug, and cut my hand doing so, and depression kicked off, along with self-anger. Apart from getting in a tangle with computer blogging, I did little apart from taking photos of the rain all day into the evening. Self-Pitying Paul visited.
Making another mug of tea later, I thought about cleaning up the mess in the kitchenette window ledge. That’s as far as it got… thinking about it. Boy, was I in a low mood today? Yes, that is the answer.
I topped up the Carers & Nurses nibble box.
I took three rainy photos later from the balcony. To the left, it was lighter as the sun was trying to rise. Then, straight ahead.
Took the one above a couple of hours later.
An hour later, A depressed and only semi-interested Inchy took a snap of the end car park mudslide.
Later, I spotted a chap from the flats on his disability scooter going up the gravel path to the park. He was driving along like Stirling Moss. The legal limit for these is 8 mph, but he was rattling away at well over that speed and uphill. If I get one, I’ll ask him where he got this one from.
. I took another shot of the same area as I did about two hours ago. The watery mud must have doubled in size! If the rain doesn’t stop soon, folks will need waders, maybe even a snorkel, to get to their car! Hehe!
. Getting dark now, but the rain had stopped.
I tried to take three shots of the late evening view. Not good this one… Not good, but better than the first? Ah, well!
I didn’t, and not much wiser now that I’ve seen the rings on this explanation, what’s different about the yellow glove? Ah, I’ve gorrit now!
Bread at last! I got the bread, all but one loaf, into the freezer to last me until next week’s Asda delivery. The tomato sauce I ordered turned out to be something else. It warned on the label that it was an extra pungent chilli sauce. I’ll give that away! The Danish loaf (substituted for Milk Roll bread) was eaten later with the evening meal.
I put some honeyed parsnips in the oven. And a can of curried beans, with tomato & basil sauce, and a suitable splashing of the Beetroot Borscht into the pan. Adding some gammon slices cut up. Slurp!
Carer Israel arrived as I was serving it up. No ankle or leg straps to take off. He gave me medications and attached the Catheter Nocturnal bag extension to the day bag. Nice lad!
IN ODE I’m no longer educatable!
Incapable of anything analytical,
Even owt logical or rational,.
Or mentally conceptual…
Reality seems more notional?
My brain’s going into neutral…
Not identifying needs so crucial or integral,
Simple daily tasks, normally classed as menial…
Making a brew and falling over was stressful,
Even my cookies, I thought, were untasteful,
At one stage, my odeing was unpoetical,
I was sinking into being pathetical,
Had a problem that was urinogenital…
That corrected itself unexpectedly, but wonderful!
I’m feeling better; a smile brewing was detectable!…
No cause nor reason to my being suddenly zestful…
But I lost the day, through feeling mournful,
A massive Memory Blank made me uncomfortable,
I’m back, belatedly, things seeming extirpable…
Don’t know what brought on this antidotal,
I’m content again, accepting being docile, Now aware I’m incognisable and coercible, Being free of the mind-devil’s grip is incredible! But the memory of this torture is indelible… Hours lost, but they now seem ephemeral… Always the chance of another mental embrangle, I tried to scribe this ode aesthetical… Whatever caused my blanks is a mystery, As I type this, I feel some affability… I’m returning to acting precociously, You may find some inorthography…
So this late started diary… Of detail, there’ll be a scarcity… My brain & body are still not agathokakological!
– – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – – –
Not much nocturnal drainage?
Another poor morning shot… Oh, dear, another one!
Not much rain today.
And an instant, as usual, unexpected, another caught me out as I went into the kitchenette. The stack of medical drawers was knocked over with some aplomb… Everything got mixed up, and I had a devil job sorting out what should go back into which drawer! All the bending down and getting back up certainly remained in the memory box. I had to take some Codeines afterwards. But I did find an in-date loaded hypo of Enoxaparin. Good! Then, I spontaneously decided to check through the nurses’ and carers’ medications. Imbecilically, I then checked under the table and the spare room… I got myself confused somewhat. And abandoned my medicational investigations.
THEN THE BIG MEMORY BLANK TIME! Erm, err…
Found myself taking some evening shots from the open kitchenette window. Best sunset for a good while tonight.
FOOD! Baked curried beans and soy mini sausages (all gone now, sadly). Tomato passata added, with the regulation Milk Roll sliced bread. I think I enjoyed it... well, it looked decent enough in this photo. Because another mini visit, stifled my recalling from her on, until the last caller visited and woke me up. No idea who it was. It was morning before the grey-cells pretended to be working again. I think my perceptiveness today must have been on holiday or AWOL.
